Object.size = function(object) {
    var size = 0
    for (key in object) {
        if (object.hasOwnProperty(key)) {
            size++
        }
    }
    return size;
}

function newPerson(name, weight, age, interests) {
    this.tag = name
    this.weight = weight
    this.age = age
    this.interests = interests
    this.shout = function(say) {
        if (typeof say == "object") {
            var finish = "I love "
            var iter = 0
            for (var phrase in say) {
                iter++
                finish = finish + ((iter > 1 && iter < Object.size(say)) && ", " || (iter == Object.size(say)) && ", and " || "") + say[phrase] + (iter == Object.size(say) && "!" || "")
            }
            console.log(finish)
        } else if (typeof say == "string" || typeof say == "number") {
            console.log(
                say == this.tag && "My name is " + this.tag + "." ||
                say == this.age && "I am " + this.age + " years old." ||
                say == this.weight && "I weigh " + this.weight + " pounds." ||
                this.tag + " shouted: " + say
            )
        }
    }
}

var grant = new newPerson( //args: name, weight, age, interests
    "Grant",
    1000,
    69,
    {1 : "men", 2 : "dicksucking", 3 : "8 year old boys"}
)

grant.shout(grant.tag)
//output: My name is Grant.
grant.shout(grant.weight)
//output: I weigh 1000 pounds.
grant.shout(grant.interests)
//output: I love men, dicksucking, and 8 year old boys!
grant.shout("I like penis!")
//output: Grant shouted: I like penis!