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>A P0nygone x Wuten forced pairing cause I fucking can.
>Day Illuminati in Equestria
>Be working with Spaghetti King Wuten
>Be creating a new strain of pasta dish capable of self replication in a laboratory
>Have a breakthrough, self replication for pasta becomes possible.
>Wuten: Yeeees.... yeees.
"Dude you're fucking weird."
>Shin: And he took three of my assassins and made them into pasta sauce! Do you have any idea how long it took them to get their hair like that?!
>Wuten: Necessary sacrifices for greatness gentlemen.
"I think you just want to never run out of spaghetti."
>Wuten: That too....
>Anon and Shinobi watch in horror as Wuten digs into the self replicating spaghetti with his bare hands
>Wuten: Soo... delicious.... more..
"Why would you do that? Seriously, why?"
>Music starts to play through a nearby intercom
>Wuten: Do not question my methods Anonymous... and what is that?
>Shinobi: It's coming from outside.
>Thinking it's an invasion Anonymous, Wuten, and Shinobi gather nearby weaponry and make their way out of the basement lab, up the stairs from the first floor of their home, and to the second floor.
>Wuten takes a look out of the second floor window to find... P0nygone standing outside
>Screwball is standing to his left, she's holding up a boombox
>Well that explains the music
>But why is P0nygone here... and why is he looking at Wuten like that
>P0nygone points to Wuten and begins to sing
>P0nygone: Now and then I think of when we were together....
>Screwball sings as his back-up
"What is he doing?"
>Shin: He's... singing?
>P0nygone: Like when you said you felt so happy you could die...
>Told myself that you were right for me
>But felt so lonely in your company...
>But that was love and it's an ache I still remember...
"Should... should we shoot him?"
>Wuten: No... let him sing.
>P0nygone: You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness...
>Like resignation to the end, always the end...
>So when we found that we could not make sense
>Well you said that we would still be friends
>But I'll admit that I was glad it was over...
>Shin: Is he done?
>P0nygone: But you didn't have to cut me off!
>Shin: I guess not..
>P0nygone: Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing!
>And I don't even need your LOVE
>But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough
>No you didn't have to stoop so low
>Have your friends collect your records and then change your number
>I guess that I don't need that though
>Now you're just somebody that I used to know...
>Now you're just somebody that I used to know
>Now you're just somebody that I used to know

"Okay maybe he's done now."
>Wuten starts to lean out of the window
>Shin: Wuten what are yo-
>Wuten: Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over...
"Oh god damn it not you too!"
>Wuten: But had me believing it was always something that I'd done...
>Shin: I'm outta here...
>Shin places his weapon upon a nearby bed and walks the fuck out.
>Wuten:But I don't wanna live that way
>Reading into every word you say
>You said that you could let it go
>And I wouldn't catch you hung up on somebody that you used to know!
"Right behind you."
>You throw your weapon next to Shin's and walk out of the room.
>You leave Wuten and P0nygone to sort this bullshit out.
>P0nygone: But you didn't have to cut me off!
>Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing
>And I don't even need your LOVE
>But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough
>No you didn't have to stoop so low
>Have your friends collect your records and then change your number
>I guess that I don't need that though
>Now you're just somebody that I used to know...
>Somebody...
>Screwball: (I used to know)
>P0nygone: Somebody...
>Screwball: (Now you're just somebody that I used to know)
>(I used to know)
>(That I used to know)
>(I used to know)
>P0nygone: Somebody...
>Somebody...
>Screwball: (I used to know)
>P0nygone: Somebody...
>Screwball: (Now you're just somebody that I used to know)
>(I used to know)
>(That I used to know)
>(I used to know)
>P0nygone: Somebody...


>Be day 182 in Equestria
>The Illuminati have fully settled into their new base of operations
>A giant metal monolith on the edge of Sweet Apple Acres
>Be working on cleaning up another mess from the Spaghetti King
>God damn Wuten and his spaghetti antics
>As you're mopping the floors an undead lich comes walking towards you.
>His clothing seems a living entity as it snakes around him
>It's as if he's wearing smoke...
>When he's no more than a few feet away he speaks to you
>Chronicler: Anonymous... have you seen Betty? There is much we need to discuss.
"Oh, um... yeah she's right here."
>You walk over to a metal door with a touchpad next to it
>After putting in a combination the door opens for you
>An hour ago she walked in with Winona and she was carrying some glowing green potion
>You thought nothing of it.
>But... when you open the door and see what's inside... you probably should have warned someone.
>You're greeted to the site of Betty... she's sporting a horse cock... a real god damn horse cock with balls.
>So that's what that potion was for
>She's currently pounding it into poor Winona
>Betty: Oh yeah you got a tight little dog cunt don't ya?
>Winona yelps and tries to move, but Betty and her horse cock are too powerful
>Betty: Oh god I'm cumming for the 12th time!
>She screams at the top of her lungs and unloads cum into the air
>She unloads an amount no human body she should be capable of doing
>That's when you see... that the entire room is covered in horse semen
>Poor Winona is covered...
>Betty turns to the two of you, panting heavily.
>Betty: God that was awesome.
>You look on in horror, you turn to Chronicler
>His empty eye sockets are witnessing the site
>It's impossible to discern what he's thinking due to the face that he has no facial expression
>His sudden turn to you causes you to jump in surprise
>Chronicler: Anonymous. I need to show you something.
"Wait what?"
>His skeletal arm grabs hold of you
>A wave of nausea washes over you as you're teleported to a lone tower within a darkened realm
>Chronicler: See... the thing of it is, I need your assistance on something. It is of dire importance.
>He walks towards the opening in the tower and you follow close behind
>After all he's your only way out of here
>When the two of you eventually get inside the tower you see various trinkets, skulls, weaponry, and tomes.
>Though a single item stands out from the rest.
>Chronicler approaches said item and hands it to you
>You hold it as if it's the most fragile thing on the planet
>Chronicler: Anonymous, this particular item holds my life, my very essence is in this bottle.
"And... you're giving it to me because."
>Chronicler: Because I need you... I need you to destroy it.
"What?! Why?"
>Chronicler: BECAUSE FOR THE REST OF MY IMMORTAL LIFE THAT SCENE WITH BETTY WILL PLAY IN MY MIND! I no longer wish to live... and I cannot kill myself... nor is there a spell powerful enough to rid me of such horrors.
>You stare into the bottle, hesitant to bring an end to someone who's lived for so long
>Chronicler: If it helps you'll be brought back to the monolith upon my demise.
>The decision seems a little easier now.
>You raise your arms above your head to smash the bottle to pieces
>Suddenly you hear Betty shout from outside
>Betty: "I'm cumming while a elementary school student licks my asshole!"
>A strand of semen hits the bottle and knocks it out of your hands
>Like webbing it keeps the bottle pinned to a nearby wall
>Chronicler falls to his knees
>Chron: Why me...?
>There's no way in hell you're going to dig through futa horse semen to get to a bottle
>Chronicler knows it, Betty knows it, everyone knows it.
>How did Betty even get here?
>It doesn't matter it's fucking Betty Spaghetti
>She comes stumbling into the tower
>Her hardened horse cock throbs with want
>She gives you and Chronicler a very... very scary face
>Betty: It's dangalang time...
>Chronicler: Jokes on you.
>Chronicler attempts to cast a spell, but the semen on the wall absorbs the spell before it can be cast.
>Cron: Semen that can absorb magic? Clever girl...
>Both you and Chronicler are horribly horribly raped by Betty
>Today wasn't a good day
>Since Chron has no hole Betty takes his eye socket
>Today was a worse day for the lich.