Anon's Night Before Hearth's Warming

>T'was the day before Hearth's Warming, and all about the land,
>All the ponies were a-scurry, preparing for next day planned.
>For all the little ponies knew of such a cheer
>That an alicorn named 'Saint Bonnie' would soon be here.
>Though the cheer spread far, it wasn't spread all,
>For a resident Anon's cheer was found to be small.
>He did not celebrate the holiday himself, you see
>For Anon celebrated a day called 'Christmas', he did it with glee.
>But he was the only one who knew what Christmas was,
>So on that day he shut himself away from all the buzz…

>"HI, ANON!" Pinkie beamed, her joy well-renowned,
>As her bouncing and pronking were Anon-bound.
>Anon flinched as his friend, 'Ponk', entered his house,
>Waking him from a nap, along with his mouse.
>"What do you want?" he growled, grumpy as hell.
>"Just saying hi~. Though, you don't have to yell."
>He sighed. For Anon, this was a horrible day.
>It reminded him for all his family taken away.
>"What's wrong, Anon?" Pinkie asked. "Did I make you mad?"
>"Sorry," he admitted. "Just feeling a little sad."
>"Sad?!" Pinkie screamed. "NO NO NO, CAN'T HAVE THAT!
>"We need to get you presents! A train! A toy! A hat!
>"OOh! Maybe some festive fudge I've been cooking all week-"
>"PINKIE!" Anon interrupted. "I'm fine. Don't worry about the freak."

>By freak he referred to himself, for a reason
>That made him unhappy to be a human this season.
>"O-ohh…" Pinkie stammered. "But I wanted to get something
>"So you wouldn't, well, not GET anything!"
>"I'm fine, really," he stated, but Pinkie did not listen.
>For soon he saw that her eyes started to glisten.
>And soon he was whisked away by a pink fluffy blur.
>Onward to Sugarcube Corner! With Ponk as his chauffeur.

>"Good afternoon, Anon!" said Twilight, a smile across her face.
>"You finally decide to leave your old place?"
>Anon scowled. "Ha ha, very funny. I blame Pinkie
"For bringing me out here, away from my stinky
>"Home." He grumbled again. He'd rather not be here.
>"Come onnnn, Nonny, at least have some cheer."
>"Here," Twilight said. "I'll buy you something to eat."
>"Mr. Cake, can I get a Super-Duper Deluxe Choco-Lover Treat??"
>"Sure thing, Princess!" he said, chipper as ever,
>And off he went to undertake this endeavor,
>Leaving you and Twilight and Pinkie to stand
>In a gingerbread house that was completely grand.

>It took a matter of minutes, but it was done.
>Now the dessert was ready, and his consumption begun.
>God, it's so good, Anon mentally noted.
>Though, he noticed a Pink Pony doted
>Upon his shoulder. Why did she care?
>He longed to be loved; no colt or mare
>Could replace the family and friends he had.
>'>implying Anon had friends. bro, u glad?'
>Indeed I am, my friend. But that is not the point.
>But here in the story, we're at a joint.
>Perhaps Anon can find it in his heart
>To embrace the holiday spirit, each and every part.

>Anon, munching on his dessert, to himself wondered
>Why, after many a good day in Ponyville plundered
>These ponies would be nice to him. Perhaps they sought
>To give him good cheer, that they might ought
>To wish him well on this fine day. To him, that was weird.
>Why'd they care about him, a no-family neckbeard.
>"Soooo, Anon, you gonna open my present?"
>To your surprise, indeed a gift that Twilight meant
>For you to open rested upon your lap. "Huh," he grunted.
>"Thanks, Starbutt." And the present of which he confronted
>He opened up. Wrappings, ribbon- Holy shit!
>Was that a? Hoo boy, yeah it was. His lip he bit.
>Twilight Sparkle had gotten him a book.
>And- was it? Yeah it was! It had that look(?!)!
>"Do you like it?" she asked. And, still in shock,
>He nodded. "I l-love it, Twilight! Oh my god," he would balk.
>"THANK YOU SO MUCH TWILIGHT! I LOVE IT SO MUCH!"
>"I had to do some heavy research, it's probably off a touch,
>"But I'm very glad you like it!" She was nearly ecstatic.
>At his reaction, a glee so charismatic.

?! - Full disclosure here, it was a Captain Underpants book.
 What, you thought it was 'Twilight'? For that there's no hook.

>"Oh, there you are, darling!" came the sweet voice
>Of Rarity, the most generous mare by choice.
>"OH! Uh- Hi Rarity," he said, a stammer made apparent.
>"Oh, dear Anon, are you here on an errand?
>"Or perhaps you're going to embrace the cheer
>"That Old Saint Bonnie will soon bring here?"
>He rolled his eyes. "Anon, don't roll your eyes,
>"It's supposed to be a fun time for all sizes."
>"Sorry, Rarity," Anon said. "Just that I don't believe
>"In the Equestrian holiday of Hearth's Warming Eve.
>"Though…I'm not against enjoying the day, just, y'know,
>"Speaking as a human in Equestria. By the way, so much snow!"
>She sighed. "I know it must be strange to you, still,
>"But no pony- well, no human, for that matter, will
>"Remain unloved on today of all days. I got you a present."
>Oh boy another present, Anon thought. He took what she sent
>And opened it up. Was that? Oh jeez, it WAS!
>"Oh my God is that a new suit? For what cause?!"
>Indeed, the new fancy suit was a dark violet
>And had a rich green shirt, and a tie hued of scarlet.
>"I figured you needed something to replace that old rag
>"That you always wear. Please, feel free to brag~"

>He jokingly wondered if everyone in Ponyville
>Was gonna give him presents. Some force of will.
>Then, he heard the rough, brash call
>Of Top Cunt's voice. God help us all.
>"Hey there, Green-bean." Yep, fucking Rainbow Dash.
>"What?" he deadpanned. "Here to give me a splash?"
>"Nahhh, just came here to give you a gift."
>Huh? A gift? For him? His bane looked adrift,
>She never got him anything for Christmas-
>Sorry, Hearth's Warming. But still, this was
>Very off. "Okay?" He took the bag. And he started
>To open it…his own eyes darted
>To the picture that lay inside. It was a photograph
>Of Rainbow Dash, bottom up by at least half.
>OF ALL THE DAYS SHE COULD HAVE MESSED WITH HIM,
>SHE JUST HAD TO PICK THIS ONE. Anon's head brimmed
>With fury, and he got up to leave in stride.
>"Anon? Where are you going? Don't you want to come inside?"

>His fury untapped, he finally started to yell.
>"You know what, Rainbow Dash, go to hell!"
>"ANON! What are you-" Princess Twilight began.
>"No shut up, I'm going home. Much better than
>"Staying here with this fucking cunt.
>"Good day, good night, and Happy Whatever,
>"I'm not coming back, not today, not ever!"
>He left, his yelling subsided. And he didn't turn back.
>And everypony there wondered what had made him crack.
>But Anon knew. He knew full well why he snapped.
>Each year, on this day, he felt trapped
>With no one to be with. He had no family
>Here to help him be happy or full of glee.
>And I saw him run home, tears in his eyes.
>An idea I had, like a lightbulb it flies.
>So I made great haste. I needed to be quick,
>If I wanted to do the job of 'Saint Nick'.

>Onwards to Anon's house, a place full of clatter
>So I could see myself just what was the matter.
>And there I saw him, full of tears and beer,
>No doubt miserable from lack of holiday cheer.
>Normally I would enjoy this sad display
>But I didn't. Not here, and not today.
>It had to be stopped. Putting out my wick,
>I thought of a plan, and I thought it up quick.
>Adjusting my voice to a deep baritone,
>I called out to him. "YOU ARE NOT ALONE."

>Startled by my booming voice, he whimpered,
>"Who's there?" His anger's probably simmered.
>"IT IS I, THE GREAT SPIRIT OF THE HOLIDAY.
>I'VE COME TO SHOW YOU CHEER. COME THIS WAY.
>Not waiting for him, I cast a little spell
>To show him sights of those who had meant well,
>And into his very mindscape I leapt
>To discover where his sorrow had kept.

>Inside his dreams I saw his past.
>Of friends, family, humans amassed.
>"THIS WAS YOUR HOME, WAS IT NOT?"
>"Yeah. Mom, dad, friends. They all sought
>"To keep me happy on Christmas each year.
>"But now…" he sighed. As to their fate, I feared.
>"They're gone. All of them. I can't go back.
>"Trust me, the other have tried." The area went black.
>"Whoever you are, spirit or not, just go away.
>"Leave me be, on this whatever eve or day."
>Not content with his answer, you knew it had begun.
>So another spell cast and the dreamscape spun
>Into a different sort of place. Of Sugarcube Corner,
>With all of the ponies gathered to discuss the foreigner.

>"Rainbow Dash, what the BUCK?!" Twilight screamed.
>"That was very bad! You saw how his tears streamed!"
>"I told you I was sorry!" Rainbow shouted. "But I thought
>"He would like that sort of thing." Apparently not.
>"Well, we can't change the past," Rarity sighed.
>"But we can still cheer him up. We'll do it tonight!"
>Anon looked towards wherever the voice came from.
>I kept myself hidden. Better to keep him dumb
>As to your being. "Why are you showing my this?"
>"YOU ARE NOT ALONE. THEY, TOO, SHALL MISS
>"YOU IF THINGS KEEP ALONG THEIR CURRENT PATH."
>"Alright, that settles it! We'll go an' surprise
>"The pants offa Anon before sunrise."
>"Yeah! Don't worry, Nonny, we'll save you from death!"
>"Pinkie, he's not in mortal danger. Don't hold your breath."
>And I saw Anon's face contort to mixed emotion.
>"T-They care? W-Why would they make a motion
>"To try and help me?" And to that I said this.
>"YOU ARE NOT ALONE, BOY. THEY, TOO, SHALL MISS
>"YOU IF FATE KEEPS ALONG ITS CURRENT PATH.
>"C-Current path? The fuck?" And now, upon his profane tongue
>The land once more distorted into a new life unsung…

>It was a cold, stormy winter night.
>About a year after the fateful blight.
>"Where am I?" he asked, and I only nodded
>Towards the Sugarcube Corner. It was kind of blotted.
>He ran towards it, and saw a familiar face.
>"Pinkie Pie?" It was her, and though the laws of time-space
>Prevented her from seeing him, he saw her sorrow.
>"What happened to her?" he asked, her emotion he borrowed.
>"Oh…Anon, why did you have to leave us here?"
>"Leave?" he asked. But his sorrow fell on a deaf ear.
>"You could have at least said why."
>And off she went to deliver a pie.
>I once again pointed to an enormous tree.
>The very castle that stood as far as the eye could see.
>And he went there, hoping to clear up confusion.
>Instead he saw Twilight, in a suit that was a fusion
>Of what they wore and what he wore.
>"T-that's my suit.." he noted. "I need to know more."
>And Twilight sighed. "I'm going, Spike. To see
>"Anon once more. Take care of the place for me."
>She walked off, towards a then-unknown place,
>With me and Anon following her with great haste.

>There I saw it. Old Ponyville's Graveyard,
>Home to the old, the sick, and the charred.
>"W-why is she going here?" Anon asked with hesitance.
>"I THINK YOU KNOW WHY." I said. His countenance
>Grimaced, and he walked over to where Twilight lay.
>"Oh, Anon…I'm sorry. It was on this day
>"That you left us. If I had known-
>"Well…if any of us knew why you were alone,
>"I'd have come sooner. I did what I could,
>"…the others. They tried to move on.
>"But the news made it a harsh unwelcome dawn.
>"I'm sorry. Happy Hearth's Warming, Anonymous."
>And she got up, tears in her eyes, body autonomous.
>Anon looked upon the stone that she her prayers gave
>And saw that it was his stone, his very own grave.

>He was stunned by the very sight of a tombstone
>That bore his name. Unable to cope with it, he moaned.
>"This has got to be a joke! You can't be serious!"
>But I was. I told him that. He was furious.
>"I don't want to die, I don't want them to live their life
>"With the fact that I left them in strife!
>"I need to go, Spirit! I need to stop this from happening!"
>"YOU CANNOT CHANGE THE FUTURE. CEASE YOUR HAGGLING."
>And with his fear instilled I cast one last spell
>That would wake him from this Celestial-forsaken hell.
>I vanished from the sight, and he woke from his napping
>To find that a pony was upon his door a-tapping.

>"Anon? Anon, are you there?" she called.
>That was definitely the voice which drawled
>Of fear and worry. "I am, Twilight."
>"Can we come in?" she asked, and he beheld the sight
>Of six ponies; THE six ponies, all came in
>To visit Anon. He knew why they visited him.
>"We were worried that you had, er, that you weren't
>"Happy with today. I'm sorry if you felt burnt-"
>But he came up to them and hugged them so warmly,
>As his entire being finally filled with holiday glee
>And his heart grew three sizes that day.
>(To me, I find that a tad bit too gay.)
>"Thanks, girls," he choked. "I needed that, I think."
>Then he saw something. He took the moment to blink.
>Was it the spirit he saw, or something else- nay.
>It couldn't be anything else but the sight of a sleigh.
>It was the vehicle of the mysterious Saint Bonnie,
>Flying away with a sack of toys which looked not-too-scrawny,
>Off to spread holiday cheer, late into the night.
>And he smiled, the old human; and I did, too, though very slight.
>But upon the house I saw no need to dwell.
>And away I left, for now his heart was well.
>And as his friend Pinkie gave him a present to unwrap
>I close this story now, the cover soon to flap.
>And I, Discord, called out as I flew out of sight,
>"Merry Whatever to all, and to all a good night!"