Side Dish: Spoiled Basket

Side Dish: Spoiled Basket

-----------------------------------------

A mix of boredom and fear. That was how I felt that Friday night. It was a rainy night and I had volunteered to stay behind and to clean up the cooking club's disastrous mess. Asparagus there, three cartons of spilled milk here, and to top it all off, a large bag of flour, all wasted thanks to Nolan trying to bake a loaf of bread. Seriously, you give a guy an empty bowl and he somehow manages to burn it by pouring expired milk in it. There was even some red stuff over at the counter. I remember sniffing it and thought it was blood. Taste told otherwise. The cleaning went on and Sombra the janitor knocked on the door. Told me that school's closing in ten minutes. I nodded and decided to just fix the seats and stack the unwashed dishes on the sink. Walking out, I passed by the gym and heard a noise. At first I jumped and probably screamed like a girl for a second, before peeking inside. It was Rodrigo Primehoof. Notorious student. Heard he was more racist than Norman, more devious than Flash Sentry, worse cook than Nolan. Normally, I would've just left the guy like always but I figured that if someone exaggerated about his cooking skills and I haven't heard any other reports of exploding bowls of milk from the home eco kitchen, then he probably wasn't as bad as many would believe. After all, even my introversion is usually exaggerated by many, though I can only handle so many people in one hour before I just drop like a sack of potatoes. Rodrigo was limping to the basketball container while holding his crotch in pain. I came in and knocked on the door to tell him that school was closing in a few minutes.

"Rod?"
>"W-what? Oh, hey! (Ah...my freaking crotch)"
"School's closing in a few."
>"Yeah, yeah, just cleaning up the place. Balls are scattered everywhere."
"Were you talking about these basket balls or the ones you're holding on to because honestly, looks like they both need some help cleaning up."
>"Haha, very funny. (Ah..crap, it burns so much)"
"What the heck were you doing in here anyway? I didn't know you play basketball."
>"I don't. I was just releasing my pain by throwing these balls everywhere...then the pain ricochet'd back at me."
"Penny for your thoughts?"
>"Nah, not pennies man. My whole life." He says, sitting down.
"What about it?"

Rodrigo sighed heavily, and then tried to shoot a ball to a hoop.

>"Everything, man. Besides Laine, Vinyl and Councillor Cadenza, everyone is freaking afraid of me! Ever since I've been at this school, they've all been treating me like a criminal. Axel even tried sticking a chip in my arse because he was afraid that I would try and do something. They all think I'm a criminal thanks to a single event from LAST YEAR!"
"Well, it's highschool. First impressions will brand you forever. Like real life if you're caught on the news or something like that."
>"Yeah, but I've done so much to try and change myself, and it all just fails miserably. I mean you probably don't know how it feels like to be treated like a plague! I bet if Ebola were a woman, she'd commit suicide the moment I ask her out."
"Exaggeration won't help-"
>"But I'm not exaggerating! You think I wouldn't be here throwing balls all over the place in a fit of rage if I was just exaggerating? You don't know how it feels to have a problem like this!"
"Actually, I do."
>"Sure, big dude with a talent for cooking that hangs out with a cute botanist and a runner up for the student council elections while being hunted down by Coach Spitfire to join the football team, knows what an unwanted guy like me feels."
"Nitpicking on me wouldn't hide the truth. Sure I was lucky to find friends, but in the long run, I don't have much else to look forward to." I told him, handing him my bottle of pills.
>"The heck is this?"
"Panic attack pills. Anxiety pills. Whatever you want to call them. I call it my normality medicine."
>"What's this got to do with-"
"I can't be in certain places because I get my heartrate up. I can't eat, sleep, talk or stay in crowded places because I lose my stamina and my heart's will to be normal. I have a condition that limits me to do things. Because of it, I've been branded a hermit by everyone. No one wants to talk with me or hang out with me because I either cut it short just to run off or they're afraid they'll give me a heart attack. A fragile little armadillo. No one but a few people wants to hang out with me, same as you."
>"At least you're not being hated!" He retorts.

I put my hand on his shoulder, patting him.

"Only difference is that you still have the chance to change what people think about you. I don't have the choice for the sake of my health. You're luckier than most people."

Rod scratched his head looking unsure. He then looked at his phone where he has a wallpaper of him and Laine posing by Starswirl's monument. For once, I saw for the first time Laine Sunflower smiling. Usually she was always so grumpy, especially when people look up to her. Rod then stared at his phone for half a minute.

>"Yeah, but some even luckier than others..."

Rodrigo didn't seem bad when I talked to him. I noticed that despite his pessimistic talking, he seemed genuinely optimistic about changing for the better. I envy him in a way. Ever since I was a child, I had already conditioned myself to stay a loner, which in turn, screwed up my social skills when I  grew up. When I talked to Rodrigo, I kinda saw a reflection me in him. While he was misunderstood, he was always alone, hanging out with the same set of friends he's had since the start. I hung out with Sweetleaf and Roman because I was used to them. My anxiety disorder gives me panic attacks whenever I have social problems. Even the tiniest one with a stranger could get my heart rate and breathing to go into abonrmal levels.  When  I told Mary about my past, she knew the right words to say. She told me that I should try and break out of the comfort zone. Try and control the anxiety, not let it control me.   Now, I feel as if that if I become friends with Rodrigo, maybe I could be one step closer into finally breaking out of my extreme anxiety disorder. People always did say that doing nothing will change nothing. The day I became friends with Roman and Mary were the most exciting and scariest days of that year. I was reluctant at first. I couldn't say a word to any of them without stuttering or just backing up and pretending that I was just some third wheel to them, but then I got used to them. However I never joined Roman on his campaign tours and I never joined Sweetleaf out for some social gathering because I was afraid of unfamiliar environment. The same feeling of uncertainty I had when I moved into Canterlot was what I felt whenever they invited me to do something with them. I couldn't help it if I'm too scared for my health. I guess this is what Roman feels everyday when he's awake.
 That night, I  decided to go on and try to help Rod in any way I could because in a way, I'd also be helping myself. As I walked through that night, I passed by Mary Sweetleaf's home where I heard some muffled noise at her backyard, followed by some glass breaking. I assumed she was up tending to her garden so I decided to  visit her.

*CRASH*
"..."
>"*CLICK*"
"Mary?"
>"Huh?" Mary says, doing a 180 degree turn and pointing a silenced pistol right at me.
"Wh-WHOA, WHOA!"
>"Pete? Goddammit, you nearly scared the crap out of me." Sweetleaf says while taking the piece of rolled paper off her mouth
"The heck are you doing with a gun!?" I asked her.

She then looks at her gun, confused. It's as if she just realized she was holding one.

>"What are YOU doing in my backyard?"
"I...I heard some noise and..."
>"*TSH-KSK*"
"A-and I thought that"
>"*BANG*"
"D-drop by and say hello..."
*CRASH*
>"..."
"So...uhh..."
>"Oh, sorry, was your heart acting up again?" She asks genuinely concerned.
"N-No, just that I...I...I came at a bad time.
>"Sigh. No, you didn't. I was just relaxing, shooting bottles and looking at the night sky..."

By the tone of her voice, it looked like she was tired and was about to go to bed. I quickly tried to say goodbye and leave before I become more of an unwanted guest.

"So...err...I'll see you tomorrow?"
>"Pete?"
"Y-Yeah?"
>"..."

Mary takes out another roll and lights it up before looking at me with those sleepy, dead-serious eyes of her.

>"Would you judge me as a horrible person?"
"W-what? No, NO! Of course not!"
>"Of course you won't. You've known me for twenty two months."
"Yeah I mean, you're great person! You've helped me and Roman tons of times, plus you're ...uhh... a botanist!"
>"If we met for the first time and you saw me as a dangerous criminal, would you still judge me as some sort good person?"
"Mary...is this about-"
>"Yes, it's about that."
"Look Mary, I don't judge you for whatever job you have right now, illegal or not. I mean, sure you own some narcotics but I don't want to ruin how I always see you in school. You're Mary Sweetleaf. Your...drug dealing persona is just another Mary..."

Mary looks down on the grass and casually throws the gun to a pail. She can't stop but to grin at what I said while maintaining her sleepy looking eyes. I could hear her teeth gnashing.

>"Even if you see me as a good person, I'm am who I am. A criminal prowling the nights and places that no child should ever witness at an early age."
"Mary..."
>"Like little Alice into her wonderland..."
"Mary."
>"Go on. Get out of here, Pete. I'll see you in the morning." She says as she limps to her door.

My relationship with Mary is...unstable. Many times she's like a big sister who would help me at her free time. She's done so many good things.  But when I found out she was a drug dealer, I still tried to pretend that I never knew she was one. For the past few months, she had been my closest friend. She has so many secrets and I feel sorry that every time I come to her house, I see her family photos. She doesn't open up all the time, but whenever she's feeling down, she always comes to me first. When I slept that night, I couldn't help but hear the somewhat cryptic words she said over and over again in my head. "I am who I am." Mary believes herself to be a criminal masquerading as a student of a school, that her true nature is revealed in the desolate place of the night's underworld. She was a criminal, a drug dealer that only I knew about. She trusted me enough with the secret, to the point where I would cover for her over and over again. In a way, the conversation reminded me of Rodrigo. How she asked me in a pot-fueled haze if I would judge her poorly even if she started off as a criminal when we met. People around the school are always branded by  whatever first impression they make on their first day, and I want to change that for Rod's sake, and for any other who's branded unfairly. Like I said before, it would be good for my social health as well.

The next day arrived and I eagerly avoided the halls. There were too many crowds. One thing about taking other paths around the school was that you could always see some neat little easter eggs in your environment, like Scott Green stalking the history teacher Time Turner, who in turn was talking to a blushing Derpy Hooves,  Flash Sentry making passes on Amy Mint Heart, Soarin subtly hiding a magazine copy of "TRAPS INCORPORATED" in Naomi's backpack and so on. Walking outside, I saw Rodrigo already trying to do some good this early in the morning.

>"Here kitty kitty kitty."
>>"MAOW!"
"Rodrigo? What the heck are you d-doing with that tree?"
>"What does it look like! I'm climbing it!" He says, shaking like a man hugging a large cube of ice.
"You're barely three feet off the ground! At this point people will think you're some sort of tree fetishest!"
>"WHAT!? That's what I look like from your perspective? HOLY CRAP, I NEED TO-"

Before Rod could say another word, the white cat up the tree leapt to his face in a fit of confused rage.

>"AHH! OH GOD I CAN'T SEE! I CAN'T SEE!"
"Oh crap, hang on, I'm coming to-"

Despite my wanting to help the poor man, a crowd of students suddenly walked out of the door and began accusing Rodrigo of being a tree humping freak. I wanted to defend the poor guy, but I couldn't. My agoraphobia is conflicting with my will to help, and I'm reduced to an ostrich hiding his head under the ground. (Figuratively of course). Rodrigo fell to the ground with blood on his face while the cat takes a final wee to add insult to injury. Being Rodrigo is suffering. When the bell rang, the crowd left and Rodrigo was left in the mud. I rushed from the bush I hid from to his aid, and I wasn't alone. A little girl whom I presume was Rarity's sister went to pick up her cat. She looked at Rod with an unsure face. She didn't know whether to thank him or fear him. I didn't know if she witnessed the whole thing, though I presumed she had, otherwise Rodrigo wouldn't have tried to get the cat off the tree in the first place. In the end, she left without saying a word, much to Rodrigo's dismay.

>"PTEWEY! Ugh, if my bad luck keeps going on, I may have to start getting used to liking the taste of dirt. Strangely enough I keep having weird dreams where I'm a pony eating grass every now and then."
"Come on. Up you go, we're going to be late for class."
>"Ugh. Hey, where's the cat?"
"A kid got her. I think it was Seaty Belt or something."
>"Oh...at least she got her cat." He says with a disatisfied matter.

As we walked to our respective classrooms, we continued to chatter.

"Rod, listen man, I wanna help you out."
>"Help me out? How?"
"I don't know, anyway I can. I want everyone to change their opinion on you."
>"Whoa there, good samaritan, where's this coming from?"
"Last night, I felt like...I don't know, I felt like a useless guy when I told you about my predicament, like I was sapping pity or something. I figured if I tried helping you with your social problem, I could help myself with my crowd-anxiety problems."
>"We just talked last night and suddenly you wanna be my buddy?"
"I know it all feels so sudden, but we all gotta start somewhere."
>"Do you even believe if I'm innocent of all the things people kept saying about me?"
"To be honest, no. Most of the times you were always found in the scene of the crime suspiciously. I just...I just don't want to judge you based on the norm of the students'  horrible rumor spreading."

Rodrigo stops and just looks at me with a weird smile on his muddy face.

>"You're really going to try and help me?"
"I am. It's gonna be good for both of us. Maybe if...maybe if we're both lucky, I could finally be free of my social phobias."
>"Oh god, thank you man, thank you, I...I never thought anyone but Laine and Mrs. Armor would take me seriously, I-"

Just then, the student named Bonbon Sweetdrops emerged from the ladies' room and saw Rod hugging me with a completely awkward look on my face.

>>"OH MY GOD, ROD IS RAPING ANOTHER STUDENT! ROD IS RAPING ANOTHER STUDENT!" Bonbon yells out loud.
>"WHAT!? NO! I'M JUST GIVING HIM AN AWKWARD BRO HUG!"
>>"YOU THINK YOU CAN YELL AT ME LIKE THAT? CHECK YOUR PREVILIEGE YOU MALE TERRORIST SCUM!"
>"B-BUT-"
"I...C-Can I but in for just one second? H-He was really just hugging me awkwa-"
>>"UGH, THEN IT'S PUBLIC DISPLAY OF AFFECTION BETWEEN TWO DISGUSTING MEN? YOU BOTH ARE DISGUSTING! SECURITY! MODERATORS! SOPHIE'S BOYFR-   MMMPH!"

Rodrigo sticks duct tape on her mouth and lightly punches me on the shoulder.

>"RUN DUDE! SHE'S GOING ALL IN!"
"Ahh!-" I say before we both head for the hills.

The day went on. Rodrigo spent the free periods trying to help other people. I told him to start with minor things like helping with their homework. Sadly everyone kept treating him like Sunset Shimmers before the Dazzling incident. No one trusted him, not even with the smaller things. Rod never gave up, but decided to call it a day.

>"Maybe tomorrow we'll both be lucky."

After school, I walked home while practicing coin flipping. Crossing Sweetleaf's home once again, Mary greets me from her rooftop, half-drunk. Beside her were two empty bottles of light beer.

>"HEY THERE, BIG BRAWN AND HANDSOME!"
"Mary! You're drunk again! You shouldn't be up there!"
>"Oh plhlesh, I'm barely drunk. It's called excited drunk! It's like pretending to be drunk, only like...I don't know, warning shots!" She says while pretending to pour herself a drink.
"Get down from there, you're going to hurt yourself!"
>"SHut up, you're not my real mom!"
"Mary!"
>"Yeah yeah!" She says, jumping from the roof to the ground."
"OH GOD, JEEZ!"
>"What!? I survived didn't I?" She says while opening another bottle of alcohol with her teeth. This time more stronger one than the ones she had been drinking.
"Drinking at this time? You're going to attract attention from the police!"
>"Oh screw them. They don't know who they're dealing with." She says confidently while losing balance.
"Mary, come on, at least pretend to care about your-"
>"*GULP* *GULP* GULP*"

Mary drinks half the bottle of gin without a care in the world.

"God, Mary! Cut that out!" I tell her while snatching the bottle from her.
>"Heyyo, if you wanted a drink, you should've asked! There's plenty of es' to go around!"
"What the hell's gotten into you, Mary!"
>"Not much, haha, hahaha..." She says, laughing and punching a wall."

Mary then started smiling before looking at me with those eyes of hers. The bags under her eyes. She hasn't slept well. The whole dark nature of her other job would sometimes get into her head. I warned her about what psychological trauma she could endure. She was stubborn enough to tell me before that she was 'used to it'. She went to me and started laughing, and laughing, and then she uttered a single sentence before heading back to her door.

>"They...they didn't...they were innocent...I..."
"Sweetleaf?"

Sweetleaf had then locked her door. I didn't bother her and thought to myself that it was just one of those problems of hers that needed some solidarity.

"Ah...o-okay, I'll see you t-tomorrow...I guess..."

The next day, Sweetleaf was absent. Rod had already thought of a way to try and even the general perception in his favour.

>"Pete! Pete!" he shouts in the library.
>>"SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Everyone else tells him.
"Uh, h-hey!"
>"I got some great new ideas that would help me a lot!"
"Great...err, what's with all the gum on you?"
>"Ah, I was helping an old lady cross the street, then somebody yelled that I was kidnapping his grandma, so I had to run and hide in a dumpster...beside a gum-making factory."
"...Wow."
>"As a shibe would say. ANYWAYS, past is past, and I'm was thinking, what if...wait for it...I RUN FOR STUDENT COUNCIL PRESIDENT?"
"...That is the dumbest idea I've ever heard."
>"Some support you are."
"No, listen, besides the fact that I'm already locked on supporting Roman Roland, people already see you as worse than Hitler. You'll lose before the debate competition would start!"
>"Hmm, you're right. Besides, Hitler won all the ladies' votes through his sexy moustache."
"Err..."
>"Ah, look at me, I'm starting to talk like Laine. You know that girl has a poster of Hitler drinking Mountain Dew in her locker?"
"..."
>"Oops, getting off topic here. HOW ABOUT I go volunteer for community service?"
"Aren't you on community service for three years thanks to all the 'offences' you allegedly did?"
>"Oh right...this is getting harder than I thought." He says, rubbing his noggin.
"How about...uhh..."

At that moment, a crumpled poster rolled onto my foot. I read it and told Rodrigo about it.

"This? How about this?"
>"What?"
"Volunteer for the Animal Shelter. Lend a helping hand today. Free dinner."
>"Oh crap, this is perfect!"
"Yeah...you know, considering what happened with Seaty Belt's cat."
>"Pshh, that would all be a thing of the past once we do this job. Maybe the pacifist community would finally see me as a good guy than a fall guy!"

*RING* *RING* Went my phone. I  stood up and talked outside the library.
"Hello?"
>"Pete..."
"Hello? Who is this? Mary?"
>"..."
"Mary, are you there?"
>"I...sorry, I shouldn't have ca- bzzzttt..."
"MARY?"

Mary hung up that morning. I wasn't sure if it WAS Mary at first, but I called her phone again.

"Mary? Are you alright."
>"Pete...s-sorry...I just...wrong number...I g-guess..."
"I..."
>"No, forget it, it's nothing..."

Sweetleaf hung up once more. I decided to call her again but she responds with a text saying *DO NOT DISTURB*. I wondered if she was just high or drunk. Either way I decided that it was just another random thing she was doing.
Afterschool hours, we both volunteer by the shelter, being handled by a hippy named Beach Comber. He was the stereotypical hippie anyone would come to know. Curly hair, round tinted glasses and uses a really lazy accent.

>"We're here for the volunteer work?" Rodrigo asks.
>>"Ah, actual new volunteers! I didn't think Fluttershy would be able to advertise it!"
"W-Well, we're here."
>>"Excellent, excellent." he says, rubbing his hands together.
"So..."
>>"Follow me to the front yard, brah"

Out the yard, there were dogs and cats, donkeys, pigs and two goats, all making noise or bathing in their own filth. The moment I stepped out of that door, my agoraphobia is slowly acted up again. I stood there with my legs barely able to hold my own weight. They started shaking. So many living things in one small place. Unlike with other strangers, I managed my agoraphobia with ease thanks to the lack of humans in the vicinity.
Rodrigo noticed my frozen state and was a bit clueless on how far my anxiety disorder could go.

>"You alright? Allergy or something?"
"I...I...I c-can do this....b-baby steps..."
>>"So, long story short, we have some customers coming about, you two bros need to try and convince them that the shelter is going down and that they either donate or buy a dog to help the shelter. Speaking of which..."

Beach Comber holds out a donation jar, demanding we pay tribute.

"Seriously? We're a-already volunteering!"
>>"Do you want me to go bankrupt? Half the time people come here for the free dinner, now pay up for donations!"

I hand the man a dollar. Rodrigo does the same. Beach Comber looks at the jar with contempt.

>>"Seriously?"
"What?"
>>"COME ON, THE SHELTER REALLY NEEDS THIS, BRAAAAAH."
"FINE, FINE!" I tell him and gave him a dollar fifty.
>"Uhh...I...err..don't have any left..so..."
>>"Pshh, typical. You come volunteering and you can barely (grumbling at a distance)"
"..."
>"I bet the free dinner's gonna be worth .50 cents."
"If you're lucky."

We then started to do our jobs. Rod decided that I do the customer handling and that he handle the feeding and fight-breaking in the playpen. First customers who came in was a couple.

>>>"For the last time, Matilda, I do not need a pet donkey!"
>>>>"Oh Cranky, I know how much you wanted one when you were still a kid."
>>>"That was 40 years ago!"
>>>>"Well I wanted a child twenty years ago, but I couldn't, so why not just buy a companion? I heard it's good for your health!"
>>>"Pshh, as if a donkey would be good for my health."
>>>>"Oh hush now. Excuse me, good sir?"
"Ahh...W-Welcome to Beach Comber's A-A-Animal S-Shelter....I...err..." I managed to utter while poking both my pointing fingers.
>>>"My wife here wants a pet donkey. Whattayagot?"
"Uhm...w-well, we have f-four donkeys! I t-think we can find s-something suitable for you and y-your lovely wife..."
>>>>"Such a gentleman."
>>>"Hey, I can be a gentleman!"
>>>>"Excuse my husband. He's always so jealous." Matilda jokes, trying to light her husband's mood
>>>"I am not!"
>>>>"So, where are these donkeys, young man?"
"F-Follow me..." I say, waddling to Rodrigo.

Rodrigo was busy trying to get the horde of dogs off of him. Apparently the scent of bubblegum was still too strong even after he took all of the gum off of him.

>"ACK! THESE DOGS ARE KILLING ME!" Rod shouts out.
>>>"GUAH! SEE, THESE SHELTER ANIMALS ARE KILLER, MATILDA!" Cranky yells out loud.
>"W-WHAT?"

Rod threw all the dogs on him away and dusted himself off.

>"I didn't know we have customers! Don't take everything I say so seriously, sir and madam!"
>>>"But those dogs were-"
>"MERELY PLAYING AROUND! HAHA...ah...err..."
>"R-Right..."

As the three converse, my anxiety grew five levels up. All the animals were slowly walking and slithering around my legs. Coupled by my claustrophobia in this really small fence, I started to panic subtly. I started to back up to the pig pen and I accidentally tip over the entrance.

>"Trust me sirs, our donkeys are of top tier qualities! Now if you would just-"
"ACK!"
>"PETE!"
>>>>>"OIIINK!"

The pigs suddenly ran out of the pen and began spreading chaos all over the shelter, causing a chain reaction of gates going down.

>"AH NUTS, THE ANIMALS!"
"Ah...I...I...Ah..."

I remember that day clearly. I was petrified. Everything was in disarray. Damn me for that day. Beach Comber was too busy taking a crap while listening to the Beatles with his head phones to care. Rodrigo was out there trying to control the situation.

>"DOGS! NO, BAD DOGS! NO, NO, DON'T GO FOR THE OSTRICH. AHH! PETE, HELP ME WITH THIS!"
"I...I..."
>>>"FOR GOD'S SAKE BOY, DON'T JUST STAND THERE, HELP THE KID!" Cranky says
>>>>"AIIE! THERE'S A MONKEY ON MY BACK!"Matilda cries out
>"WAIT A MINUTE, WE DON'T HAVE A MONKEY!"
>>>>"GET IT OFF, PLEASE!"
>"PETE! PETE!"

Animals...everywhere. Dogs around, cats around, goats around making noises. I couldn't grasp the situation. I couldn't reach for my pills. I did what I did best, and [spoiler]ran away[/spoiler].

>"PETE!"

I ran to the inside of the shelter's office and tried to calm myself. Suddenly a girl puts her bag down and runs outside. It was Fluttershy to the rescue. She was late to the volunteering party.

>>>>>"Oh my goodness..."
>"HAAALP!"
>>>>>"H-Hold on!"  Fluttershy yells

Fluttershy then, with her expertise, rounds up all the animals. Rodrigo was still getting beaten up by the pigs' round bellies. I was sitting by the corner trying to control my breathing and drinking my pills. In a minute, all the animals were under Fluttershy's command, slowly walking back to their respective kennels and pens.

>>>>>"Are you alright?" Fluttershy asks Rodrigo.
>"Where the heck is Pete?"
>>>>>"I think I saw him in there." She says, pointing to the office."

Rod stormed the office while Fluttershy kept on apologizing to Cranky and Matilda. The look on his face when he saw me in there by the wall, scared like a little kitten.

>"Good god man, I needed you five minutes ago! What the hell are you doing in here!?" He asks angrily.
"I...I couldn't...I mean...so..many..."
>"Dammit man, my face is messed up because of you!"
"I know, I k-know..." I say, giving myself a facepalm.
>"If it weren't for Fluttershy, I would've...ugh..."

Rodrigo sat by the wall, wiping the mud off of his face.

>"Bro, I'm sorry for yelling. I don't really understand your condition, and-"
"No, it was my fault. I should've told you that I couldn't handle every sort of crowd from humans to animals. I feel so...helpless..."
>"Oh, there you go again with the self pity crap."
"..."
>"Look, maybe it was bad a start for you to try and ...how you say 'shock therapy' yourself to stop having your anxiety problems but you're seriously going to get me hurt if I keep on trusting you or relying on you to get me out of a tight spot."
"Yeah...I mean...ugh..."
>"I appreciate that you wanted to help me, but if I can't rely on you, you're just giving me more problems. Just...just go out and help the girl, I'll try to reason with the shelter guy about this whole mess."
"R-Right..."

I went out and saw Fluttershy endlessly saying sorry to the couple. The couple, well, Cranky, angrily walked out of the place. The wife felt indifference.

"U-Uh...crap..."
>>>"A-Are you volunteers?" Fluttershy asked.
"Yeah. Me and Rod were...you know, trying to help out when we saw the posters. Lot of help we were."
>>>"I didn't expect that we'd get volunteers though. I mean, I haven't gotten much help with recruiting save for the last two recruits of three months ago, Applejack, Norman and Applebloom."
"It was Rodrigo's idea but this whole thing's a mess. I mean...I..."
>>>"It's alright. I know it can be overwhelming but if you come back tomorrow, I'm sure-"

Suddenly, Beach Comber stepped out of the office.

>>"WHAT IN BLAZES HAPPENED?"
>"S-Sir! I can explain" Rodrigo says, trying to calm him down.
>>"THE REPAIRS ARE GOING TO COST ME A FORTUNE!" He yells to the skies.
"I...I c-can pay you back, we swear!"
>>>"Mr. Comber, please calm-"
>>"I AM CALM...I AM CALM...I JUST NEED SOME...HERBAL TEA...YEAH. " He says while twitching.

He then looks at Rodrigo and shouts at him.
>>"BY THE WAY, YOU TWO ARE BANNED FROM THIS PLACE."
>>>"W-What!?" Everyone said in surprise
>"Please reconsider, sir!"
>>"OUT, PLEASE!"
"I...look sir, it was my-"
>>"ALL OF YOU, OUT!"
>>>"E-Even me?" Fluttershy asks
>>"YEA-...Well no, you help me clean this place up, but you two are fired!"
>"But we weren't even hired in the firs-"
>>"YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT!"

Rod and I both went out smelling like dog manure and mint (for Rod). I couldn't even look at the guy but I could tell he's disappointed.

"Rod I..."
>"I'll...see you tommorow man. It's getting late." He says in a really disappointing manner.
"..."

I went home and figuratively beat myself for being so damn useless. I took my anxiety pills just to try and calm myself, though it was mostly a pointless effort.

"Ah Rod..."

I grabbed some rootbeer from the fridge and did my homework in an attempt to do something *at least* productive that day. I couldn't forgive myself and tried calling Rodrigo out of guilt. Phone didn't answer so I went up to get a good night's sleep. I thought to myself that I probably wouldn't be able to sleep well thanks to the guilt.  But when I went in my room, I didn't expect company.

>"Pete..."
"MARY!?"
>"You *sniff* busy?"
"I...uhh, no, I was just...WAIT, what the heck are you doing in my house!?"

As I said before, Mary was absent that day. To see her in my bedroom nearly gave me a heart attack. She was wearing a dark-yellow duster. By her side was a Russian hat and a mask. In her hand was a small locket. Golden with some of it chipping off the chain.

"Are you alright, Mary? I mean, are you bleeding or-"
>"...No..."
"What happened?" I asked her.
>"..."
"Mary..."
>"I was there...I couldn't save them."
"Couldn't save who?"

Mary gave me the locket. Inside it was a picture of two people I didn't recognize.

"Who are they?"
>"...The unlucky ones. The product of my screw-up."
"What happened? Were they part of your...job?"

Mary started crying quietly. I moved in to hug her with one arm.

>"I killed them...I killed them all...they were innocent...GODDAMMIT..."
"Shh...just...just let it all out, Mary."

I never understood much of what she had done in that job of hers. I knew it was illegal, I didn't know she did something she took deep into her heart. I tried asking her about it, but she kept answering vaguely.

"What happened out there?"
>"Two...sacks...No...*sniff*...No one s-safe...I could've saved them, I could've..."
"Mary..."
>"They w-weren't even supposed to be there...It was s-supposed to be a clean job..." She says, basically using my shirt to blow her nose and to wipe her tears.

She kept on uttering to herself that she could've 'done something', 'I could've saved them', etc, etc. To be honest this wasn't the first time she came into my home like this. Many times would she suddenly appear at my doorstep or my window, crying her eyes out or wanting a drinking buddy. To see a woman I always see as a strong productive woman, occasionally turn into a puddle of tears.

"I...I don't really know what to say, Mary..."
>"I could've saved them...I could've saved them..." She kept uttering to herself.

Mary spent the next thirty minutes just crying beside me while we looked out the window to the starry sky. I kept thinking of ways to comfort her. I tried to lighten up the mood by mentioning the Rodrigo incident a few hours ago.

"You know, f-funny story. Rod and I went to this animal shelter. Volunteered and all that. Rodrigo wanted to spend some time with the animals because he wanted to do some good deeds. Sadly for him,  everyone there was angry at Rodrigo. Probably sensed he was a terrorist, haha."
>"*sniff*"
"It was an easy job too. I blew it for Rod though."
>"...*sniff...w-what happened?" She asked, genuinely curious.
"I...I had a panic attack. Rod was left to handle the customers and the animals on his own. I broke the pig's cage door and they all...I mean, I just left him there to defend himself. Cats and dogs were all over him and the pigs were breaking everything."

Mary wipes her eyes and begins to chuckle a bit.

>"I guess you could say he was covered in bitches and pussy."
"Haha...I...I guess so. Anyway, if it weren't for Fluttershy suddenly showing up for some reason, he'd be full of bruises."
>"...Y-yeah... I wish my life had simpler problems like t-that..."
"You could quit anytime, you know?"
>"..."
"I still felt guilty for leaving him like that."
>"It's ...*sniff* not like you were at fault. You do have a mental condition. Well, a heart condition a-actually..."
"I could've done more...but I didn't. Rod must be so pissed at me."
>"..."
"But I supposed it couldn't be helped. Stuff happens. Sometimes bad things happen and we couldn't do a thing. Like with you."
>"Pete..."
"I don't know if you meant that you killed these two literally or in a sense that you let it happen to them, but don't...just don't push yourself down too hard. I know you wouldn't quit your other job for any reason in the world, but screwing up is just...a part of life I guess. We feel bad and just move on."

Sweetleaf tries to clear her voice while taking the locket back.

>"...I'm...I'm sorry. F-for *sniff* barging in on your home. I didn't...I didn't know who else to go to. I have no one else..."
"Mary..."
>"I...I didn't kill those people...by my hand, but like what you said, I could've done something."
"I won't tell you again that this life isn't for someone as young as you, but for your sake, I hope you find some peace in this."
>"Me too, Pete...*sniff*...me too..."She says,  snuggling up to my arm.

As the night went on, I realized that I had already given myself some answers. I thought to myself that my little chat with her kinda lifted my spirits up. That stuff happens whether you like it or not. That there's always another day and that you shouldn't just dwell on the past. To try again another day. For Sweetleaf's problem, it was close enough, but isolated as well. I never asked her again about the two dead people in the locket. I trust that she could recover on her own. I could never  talk her out of that drug life, but everyday I pray that she does. The next morning, I woke up with Sweetleaf beside me. We were still sitting on the floor. The sun shined bright on our faces. Mary woke up after I moved my arm a bit.

"...Ugh, my back."
>"Morning already...?"

Sweetleaf then stood up, grabbed her mask and Russian hat and did some stretches while casually fixing her scarf.
>"Thanks Pete." Was the last thing she said before jumping out of my window.

I took a bath and ate some bananas and went to school. There I saw Rod brooding by the bench.

"R-Rod?"
>"Pete..."

I sat beside him and worked up another apology.

"Rod,I'm really, really, really-"
>"Pete come on, there's no need to apologize. We were...we were both at fault." at that time.
"I...well, yeah but..."
>"But nothing. It was selfish of me to tell you that you were useless. I underestimated your anxiety disorder and again, we both did wrong yesterday."

I nodded. The students around scowl at Rod whenever they pass by him.

>"Did you know news of the shelter incident spread?"
"R-really?"
>"Yeah. Said I sabotaged the shelter and all that."
"You don't think Fluttershy-"
>"I don't know what to believe."
"Rod..."
>"Sigh. You know, every day I do a lot of good things. Not to make me sound like an egomaniac, but I just wish for once, I get appreciated. I mean, I've tried going to the soup kitchen. recycling and preventing Flash Sentry from harassing women but I just end up getting framed or accused of crap. It's a streak of bad luck. Like my mom, while pregnant with me,  broke 15 mirrors underneath a ladder while black cats everywhere roamed in front of her."
"Well, I know it's not much advice, but keep on doing it."
>"What?"
"I mean, keep doing what you do best. Help other people. Try until you get lucky."
>"Yeah but I'm getting tired about it. No one appreciates it."
"So what? A good deed's a good deed. Sure people may try to shoot you because they have a bad perspective of you, but doesn't mean you're supposed to become what you're...branded by others. You're not Rod the terrorist. You're Rodrigo Primehoof, the guy who...just ends up doing the right thing at the wrong time."

As I talked to Rod, Fluttershy and Seaty Belt (while holding her cat) walked to the bench.

>>"Umm...e-excuse me."
"Fluttershy?"
>>>"Mr. Primehoof?"
>"Hey...Rarity's sister."
>>>"It's Sweetie Belle."

Seaty Belt. Sweetie Belle. Same thing.

>"Fluttershy...well? Is he going to sue me or something? You two here to accuse me of whatever?"
>>"Actually, we're here to thank you."
>"To...what?" Rod said in disbelief
>>>"I...uhh...wanted to thank you for trying to get my cat off the tree. Days ago, I didn't want to t-talk to you because everyone said you were a bad person. But hearing what Fluttershy had to say about you...I kinda guessed you weren't as bad as I thought you were."
>"T-Thanks...?"
"See that? Looks like you finally got another one on your side."
>>"About yesterday..."
>"Yeah yeah, it was my fault, yadda yadda-"
>>"Actually, I wanted to try and get you to come to the animal shelter gain. To help. I talked to Mr. Comb and while he was upset the other day, I managed to persuade him to give you another chance."
>"Why? Why would you want him to give me another chance?"
>>"No one in this school cares about the shelter except for you two. In fact he actually kinda just accused you solo and forgot about...Pete here."
>"OH COME ON!"
>>"B-But, calm down, i-if you want, you can volunteer again! W-we could really use some help! I was really happy when I found out that the shelter had volunteers yesterday, even if everything did go into full chaos. S-So I was hoping if you-""
>"Oh, so he can try and haggle our money and-"
"Psst, don't screw this up man!"
>"Oh right. I mean...I'll...think about it. It's a definitely, though."
>>"That's wonderful" Fluttershy comments."
>>>"Mr. Primehoof, we kinda overheard what you and your pal was talking about, and I wanna let you know that I wish you the best of luck in your streak of bad luck. I mean, I've heard of bad luck streaks but yours must be cursed by some wizard or something!"
>"Hah. You got that right kid. I should buy an Ouija board and talk to my sorcerer ancestor, that jerk!" Rod jokes.
>>"So I guess I'll s-see you later then, Rod."
>"Sure thing, Fluttershy. Just keep him off my back. Even from hundreds of miles away, I could still feel his angry stare."
>>"Sure! Sure! Again, thank you for considering."

When Sweetie Belle and Fluttershy left, their words left a lasting impression on Rodrigo's face.

>"Wow. What a morning! It's like someone just gave me a free delicious meal! Feels so good!"
"See? People ARE starting to appreciate you."
>"I guess..."
"Eh, it's a small start, but it's better than nothing."
>"You're right. I got you, Laine, that little Rarity, Vinyl and Cadenza. Maybe things are finally looking up. Plus that yellow girl is pretty cute."
"You thinking of dating her?"
>"I don't know. She seems so much like an ideal daughter to me."
"Dude..."
>"N-Not in that romantic way! I just kinda fantasize what my future would be like with bad luck genes like this. I always thought I'd have like, opposite luck for children."
"Err..."
>"Know what, I'll just stop before someone thinks I have a fetish for daughter-daddy crap. I'm happy enough with what I have. At least I have a new stone to step on, one rock closer to a better tomorrow. What about you?"
"Me?"
>"You joining me?"
"...No. I'll...I'll just slow you down."
>"No offense, but I think that not joining is for the best. What do you plan to do now?"
"...I don't know. Maybe I'll just find another way to cure myself of my anxiety."
>"Well, I hope you do find a way. Maybe you should just stick to cooking, or join the varsity. Like I said before, Coach Spitfire needs some big bros on her team."
"Rod, in a field full of people, that would be a horrible idea for me. I could cost the school the whole game."
>"Eh, you're right. Then...uhh...Stick to cooking then."
"..."
>"That's what your good at, right?"
"...Yeah, you're right."

*RIIIIING*

>"Bell's here."
"Guess I'll see you soon?"
>"Yep. Thanks for everything, Pete. I mean really, I appreciate it."
"Y-You too."

As I walked to the school's doors, Sweetleaf catches up. Her hair still wet, fresh from the showers.

"Mary! Feeling okay?"
>"Define 'okay'."
"Err..."
>"I'm fine. I'm really fine." She says, trying to reassure me.
"..."
>"Oh don't be so suspicious. Hey, let's go to that skating rink that opened up last Thursday. I heard there's not much people at this day of the week in that mall."
"I...I don't know how to..."
>"I just need to take my mind off of things, okay?"
"Well, alright. I'll come with you." I tell her.
>"Wonderful!" She says, hugging me like a brother.

The past three days had been eventful for me. It wasn't completely odd, but it was a break from my regular routine. I've learned that dwelling on the past, keeping your crutches and doing nothing will solve absolutely nothing, but forcing yourself to change for the better in a less than graceful manner would just be my downfall. I decided to take it slow. Enjoy myself for whatever
will come in the following days and maybe, like with Rod, I'll get lucky and find something new and exciting in my life that won't give me a panic attack.

The End.
[spoiler] A partial continuation to >>>/mlp/19460241 [/spoiler]
[spoiler] Ow, my fingers. [/spoiler]