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- >Day fighting in Equestria
- >You wake up in the morning
- >You go to the bathroom and splash some water in your face to truly wake yourself up
- Ahh...that's better.
- >After doin your routine in the bathroom, you head downstairs for some eggs and oj
- >While chewing on your eggs there is a knock on the door
- >You walk over and open the door
- >It's surprisingly not Fluttershy this time
- >It's Twilight
- >And she looks worried
- >"Okay I don't have much time to explain this so shut your mouth."
- >You lean against the door frame
- >"Fluttershy...we didn't believe you before when you said she was crazy for you."
- >You nod
- >"Sorry for that...anyways, she convinced Discord to rip open a hole in universes so she could meet another version of you, hopefully one that loves her back."
- Shit...
- >"But he got a little carried away and turned it into a sort of game and kidnapped Fluttershy so you would come..."
- I don't like how this is sounding...
- >"Shut up! Okay its a fighting tournament between you and other Anons."
- What makes you think I want to save her?
- >"Because Celestia will have your head if you leave that tournament without our sixth element of harmony."
- Oh...why can't you help?
- >"Discord's rules. Only the Anon's can compete. They can however use companions, and you have me."
- Son of a bitch...okay let me get ready.
- >You walk back upstairs and put your brass knuckles and an exact replica of Ash Ketchum's hat on
- >Basically the only two things that came with you when you were sent to this strange horse land
- >You walk back downstairs
- Lets do this.
- >Twilight teleports you both to Ponyville town square
- >There is a giant circular portal in the middle of it
- >You can see right into it
- >There is a floating island with a coliseum in the middle of it
- That looks inviting.
- >"Shut up...let's go."
- >You walk through with Twilight
- >You see tons of green and yellow flash around you before landing in a big red room
- >You walk to a door on your left and open it
- >Your jaw drops
- >Tons of other Anons are sitting around
- >Some have other ponies with them
- >You are the only one with Twilight
- >One of them you think is gay because he's wearing tights that say CP on them
- >Probably means Cum Purse
- >You smile to yourself and sit down next to a questionable Anon
- >You turn towards him
- Uh...why are you wearing girls clothing?
- >"I am a girl."
- >Rainbow pops out from behind him-her or whatever
- >"YEAH so step OFF."
- >You put your hands up in defense
- Sorry.
- >You turn to your other side and see another strange Anon
- >But not strange in that other way
- >He's snuggling with a lung
- >Better not ask
- >A more normal looking Anon without a shirt on comes up to you
- >"Hey. Do you know what we're supposed to be doing here?"
- I think it was some kind of uh...fighting tournament.
- >"Oh...sucks for you guys then."
- >He goes back to his seat
- >You look down to Twi who is almost hiding behind your legs
- What an asshole right?
- >She nods
- >The rest of the Anon's (that you can see) appear to be normal
- >The only one that stands out is the one with Rainbow next to him dribbling a basketball with her wings
- Hmmm...
- >He's holding a picture of something close to his chest
- >A voice calls out from the sky
- >"Hello Anons! You will be participating in a fighting tournament for your freedom, what you're here for, and an extra prize of your choice!"
- >It's Discord
- >"The Mortal Koombat tournament will begin as soon as the last fighter arrives."
- Mortal Koombat? What?
- >The door swings open and another Anon walks in
- >He has a...robot Twilight with him
- >You nudge Twilight
- Look at that! It's you but...as a robot!
- >"Shut up..."
- >Discord speaks
- >"Alright now that all of the Koombatants have arrived, please make your way through to the yellow room out of the double doors."
- >A line of Anons forms walking through the door
- >Twilight holds your hand with her hooves
- >You scoop her up
- Relax, I got this.
- >She sighs as you stand in the yellow room
- >Discord speaks
- >"Each one of you is to take a ball from the basket. The ball will have a number on it. You will face the person with the number next to yours."
- >Twilight whines a little
- Shut up.
- >"So it would be like: if you get 1 then you will battle 2. If you get 3 then you will battle 4. Understand monkeys?"
- >SomeAnon calls out: "Fuck you!"
- >You turn and see two others holding him back
- >One talks
- >"Just relax and maybe we can get some ice cream later...that sounds nice right?"
- >"SHUT THE FUCK UP FAGGOT!"
- >He lets go and the enraged one just sits down fuming
- >The third Anon sits next to him and puts an arm around him cheering him up
- >He looks up at you
- >"It's not gay if it's me."
- Okay then...
- >You tune back in to Discord
- >"So make a line, and pick a ball."
- >You all do so and sit around the room in chairs
- >Your number is 9
- >"Okay will the Anon's with the numbers 1 and 2 please stand up?"
- >The shirtless Anon and the Anon with the robot Twilight stand
- >Then the room fades away and you are all sitting in the coliseum front row seats while those two stand in the center
- >Discord comes back on
- >"You have as much time as need be. But if I see you working together, I will kill both of you. Also another thing..."
- >You hear papers shuffling in the sky
- >"Ah here it is! All fighting conditions that would benefit any Anon have been enabled, and you must kill your opponent. Bonus points for creativity!"
- >Twilight gulps and hugs your chest as you stare into the battlefield
- >"Let's get this show on the road!"
- >Suddenly it becomes night time in the arena
- >A big moon casts it's glow on it
- >You watch as the Anon with no shirt on stares up at it
- >Then he falls to his knees
- Woah woah is it over already?
- >Twilight lets go of your chest and looks out
- >The Anon's hands and feet grow beefy and furry
- Oh shit.
- >Then the rest of his body
- >He stands upright as a werewolf thing and howls at the moon
- >"FIGHT!"
- >The other Anon tells his Twilight robot something and she charges at him
- >WereAnon jumps at Twibot and she disappears
- >Then you see a purple flash in the air on the other side of the arena
- >It's Twibot and she's charging something up
- >You can tell because she's floating there and it looks like the air around her is spinning
- >There is a loud pang noise and you watch as a giant purple lazer fires at WereAnon
- >WereAnon runs over and grabs the other Anon and uses him as a shield
- >Twibot calls out as the Anon struggles in WereAnon's hold
- >"NO-MASTER!"
- >She flies down at an incredible speed and jumps in front of the blast
- >There is a bright purple flash and when the smoke clears you see nothing but Twibot's head
- Oh no...
- >Twilight is tearing up on your lap
- >WereAnon lets go of him and backs up a bit inspecting the scene
- >He kneels down to her with tears in his eyes
- >"Master...Will-I-Dream?"
- >"Yes Twibright...yes you will."
- >The lights in her eyes fade
- >He stands up and faces WereAnon
- >He looks furious
- >WereAnon bounds over to him
- >He punches WereAnon in the face, making him back up a bit
- >WereAnon slashes out at him but misses
- >They stare at each other for a second
- >Then Anon steps forward to punch him in the gut
- >WereAnon thrusts his claws into Anon's midsection
- >Everything is quiet as you watch blood run down WereAnon's claws
- >Then he hoists him up and slams him into the ground hard
- >He removes his claws and licks them
- >A deep voice calls out from nowhere
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >The wereAnon freak grabs his head, rips it off, slashes his chest open, and stuffs the head inside
- >Fountains of blood spew from that Anon
- Oh my god...
- >"We're gonna die aren't we?"
- >You look down at Twilight
- Let's hope he gets beat by chance later...
- >The world fades away again and you are back in the yellow room
- >"Congratulations! Please walk through the door on your right."
- >He does so and then the room flashes green
- >"Okay! Next up, 3 versus 4!"
- >They stand up and face each other
- >One has a sort of cape on and the other has white hair
- What?
- >The world fades away and you are back in the coliseum
- >"You all heard the rules last time!"
- >"FIGHT!"
- >They rush at each other and begin exchanging blows in the center
- >The caped Anon jumps up and brings an elbow down on the white haired Anon
- >It hits him on the back and he falls to the ground
- >Caped Anon stomps at him but he rolls over in time
- >He stands up and jumps back
- >Then lightning strikes him
- >But he still stands
- What?
- >You see the lightning surge through him and it appears to heal over his bruises
- >That's kind of over powered
- >He runs forward at the Caped Anon and jumps up
- >The Caped Anon steps back
- >Lightning Anon punches the ground, sending a pulse of electricity out
- >Caped Anon jumps far back and dodges it
- >Then Lightning Anon stands up straight and speaks
- >"I'm sorry I have to defeat you like this..."
- >Caped Anon flashes his fangs and flies at him
- Woah he's a vampire?!
- >The Lightning Anon fires a lightning blast at the ground, sending him flying in the air
- >Some electricity hits the vamp's face and he staggers for a second
- >Lightning Anon takes this time to fly down at him like a bolt of lightning
- >He strikes him and chars his body
- >But he still stands
- >He's paralyzed
- >Again from the sky
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >He walks up to the Vamp and holds him up
- >Then he pulls out a gun of some sort and puts it to his chest
- >He pulls the trigger and a spear of lightning arcs through the Vamp's chest, turning him to dust
- Holy fucking shit. Twilight, I think we're gonna die.
- >She trembles
- >The world fades back to the room
- >"Congratulations!"
- >The white haired one walks through the doorway
- >The room flashes green again
- >"Alright now it's time for 5 vs 6!"
- >A normal Anon with a pickle jar stands up
- >So does an Anon with a drunk Rarity
- Hmmm...this could be interesting Twi.
- >The room changes back to the colesium
- >You see them in the middle
- >Rarity is standing on her hind legs and swaying while putting her front two hooves up
- >The Anon next to her has his fists up, but it doesn't look like he's ever faught before
- >The other Anon still has his picklejar tucked under his arm
- What the fuck is that about Twi?
- >She shrugs
- >"FIGHT!"
- >Rarity steps forward and almost falls, still keeping her hooves out aggressively
- >"Nopony is going *hic* to take my Anon from me!"
- >She steps forward towards the pickle jar Anon
- >He chuckles and puts his jar down and his fists up
- >"Wanna go then?"
- >Rarity walks over and punches him in the chest
- >He swings out only to miss because Rarity swayed
- >"Huh?"
- >He tries for a kick and she jumps on him, knocking him over
- >Then she repeatedly wails on his face
- >He eventually gets a hold on her flanks and throws her off
- >He stands
- >"How can this be? I haven't seen the way of the drunken hoof in over 700 years!"
- >He runs at her and just when he's about to strike, she vomits on him
- >He grabs his face and tries to wipe it off while screaming
- >The other Anon and Rarity kick and punch at him on the ground
- >Then, he isn't there anymore
- >He comes out of his pickle jar a few feet back
- >"Okay, no more games."
- >He pops open the jar and drinks some of the juice
- >His body buffs up and then he rushes at Rarity
- >She flinches and he punts her to the wall
- >Insta KO
- >Now it's just OP pickle and the other Anon
- >The he rushes at the pickle guy cursing about what he's done to Rarity and how he'll kill him for it
- >The mysterious pickle Anon just laughs, runs up, and uppercuts him
- >The other Anon stands up and tries to attack again
- >The same thing happens except this time with a drop kick
- >The Anon lays on the ground gasping for air
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >He raises a leg and stomps it down on the other Anon's head, crushing it to mush
- >Twilight grabs you tighter
- >"I...I don't want that to be you...when we go out there...we can't lose. Okay?"
- >You nod to her as the room fazes back to existence
- >"Congratulations!"
- >Pickle guy's body goes back to normal
- >Then the crazy pickleman moonwalks through the doorway while whistling
- Haha what?
- >"Okay gentlemen and gentlemen! We have a special match up this time! Calling up 7 and 8!"
- >A fat Anon with a mustache and a red coat stands
- >So does a regular looking Anon with a jacket
- >His jacket moves like there's something inside of it
- Huh? Twi do you see that?
- >"Yeah..."
- >The coliseum comes back and you watch as the two of them walk very far away from each other
- >Discord calls down
- >"Don't make me choose which one of you to kill...Now FIGHT!"
- >The fat talks
- >"If you insist."
- >He one throws something on the ground in front of him
- >It looks like a cube
- >But then it unfolds into a robot with lazers and guns all around it
- What?!
- >The other Anon opens his jacket and tons of tiny...crab ponies come out of it
- >They all charge at the robot
- >Including that Anon
- >The robot begins firing on the massive crowd that is approaching
- >But the sidestepping of the crab ponies is too much for it to handle and it is quickly overcome by the wave of tiny hooves crushing it
- >They surround the fat Anon and start beating him
- >The ringleader of the abominations reaches him and tells them to stop
- >The fat Anon puts his hands up to surrender
- >The other Anon stares at him
- >Then he puts a hand down to help him up
- >Fat Anon grabs his hand and stands up
- >A voice calls down
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >Lord of the Crustacean Pones calls out
- >"Discord! I'm not going to kill him!"
- >A huge clawed finger comes down and squishes the Anon who sent out the robot to fight
- >"What the fuck Discord?! I said I wasn't going to!"
- >"Well someone has to do what that voice says..."
- >The room fades back
- >"Well uh...Congratulations I guess...even though you didn't kill him, you still weakened him."
- >The Anon frustratedly stomps through the doorway with his mini army of crab ponies following behind
- >The room flashes green
- Oh no...
- >"It's our turn isn't it?"
- Yes Twilight.
- >Discords voice comes back on
- >"So anyways...number 9 and 10!"
- >You stand up and so does that freak who is wearing womens clothes
- Shit.
- >The world fades and you are standing in the arena
- >"A-anon?"
- Yeah Twi?
- >"If we don't make it-"
- Shut up and let's kick some ass Twilight.
- >She gulps
- >"FIGHT!"
- >Rainbow digs her hoof at the ground and snorts
- >Then she runs at you
- >You get down to punch her but she flies around you at the last second
- >She bucks your ass so you fall face first in the dirt
- Fuck...
- >You look up and see Twilight fighting the girly Anon
- >Not really fighting though
- >Like slaps and shit
- >You roll over and Rainbow cracks you in the face, busting your lip open
- >You drive your fist into her side and hear a loud snap and she falls over crying
- >You stand up and turn toward the faggot who has slapped Twilight into submission
- Hey bitch!
- >He/she looks over
- >You run at him/her dragging your fist along the ground
- >You let out a tremendous roar and deliver an uppercut smoother than no man in the existence of ever could achieve
- >Except maybe http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7pDmva4RlQ
- >The nasty half man half woman thing flies up and lands on it's back
- >"FINISH HI-uhh...IT!"
- >You raise up your arm and drive it down into it's face
- >Surprisingly, your fist goes right through
- >Cracks the skull like an egg and spills the blood all over your hand
- >The world fades back to the room and a bruised Twilight holds your leg
- >"Congratulations! Please move on through the doorway."
- >You walk through and see weird machines
- >A pony grabs your arm
- Hey!
- >"Come on mister, right onto this chair here."
- >You sit on the chair and Twilight sits on the one next to you
- >A bubble goes over it and green smoke comes inside
- >The smoke cleanses your body and you are healed
- >The bubble opens and you sit forward
- Nifty. Do we still get to watch the battles?
- >"Yes."
- Cool. Right Twi?
- >You turn and see her still in her pod
- Must take longer if you're more beat up...
- >Discord's voice reaches your ears
- >"11 and 12, stand up!"
- >One wall of the room fades and you can see right into the battlefield
- >It's the Anon that was sitting with that picture to his chest, and Rainbow dribbling a basketball with her wings
- >Versus...a FUCKING DRAGON?!
- Holy shit is that a dragon?!
- >You get up and go closer to the wall
- >It is about your height and talks like you
- There's an alternate universe where I'm a dragon?! FUCKING BOSS!
- >"FIGHT!"
- >Rainbow stops dribbling the ball and flies straight up in the air
- >Then she drops down like a bullet at the dragon Anon
- >He simply puts his hands up to stop her
- >Dumbass
- >The other Anon rushes him while hes distracted and hits him in the gut
- >Then Rainbow headbutts him from that velocity
- >But that stupid cunt doesn't understand dragon bone strength
- >Her neck snaps when she hits his head
- >The other Anon runs over to her twitching body
- >"No...NO! I will never forgive you for this! I -WILL- GET BACK TO MY FAMILY!"
- >He runs at dragon Anon and fakes him out with a punch
- >Dragon Anon falls for it and dodges, only to be crossed the other way with a kick
- >Anon's leg hits the dragon in the neck but he doesn't move
- >He just grabs Anon's leg and flips him around onto the ground
- >Then, still holding his leg, he brings it to touch his head while he screams out in pain
- >He lets go and Anon struggles to get up
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >Dragon Anon stands back and takes a deep breath in
- >Then unleashes waves of green flame onto Anon, burning him to ash as he screams out for someone named Tiff
- >The wall fades back to normal and the dragon Anon walks into the room
- >He is taken to a seat like you were
- >Twilight just finishes hers
- >"Wow! I feel so much better!"
- >She runs over to you
- That's great Twilight.
- >You russle her mane
- >Discord comes back on
- >"Great match that was! I can smell him from up here! 13 and 14 please stand up!"
- >The wall fades back to the arena
- >There is a regular looking Anon that's talking to himself, and that weirdo in tights
- Haha...cum purse...
- >"What?"
- Oh nothing.
- >"FIGHT!"
- >The one in tights runs full speed at the Anon having a conversation with himself
- >Then the superhero guy gets thrown high into the air
- >The Anon talking to himself moves his hand and the gay looking one gets flung around like a pancake
- >He slams him into the ground and then flies up really high
- >The guy in the superhero costume takes off his mask and takes a deep breath in
- Jesus that went by fast...
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >The flying Anon goes straight down with a fist
- >The fist connects with his chest, creating a massive blue explosion
- >When the dust clears, the Anon is still standing there talking to himself
- >The wall fades and that Anon walks in
- >You walk over to him
- Hey who were you talking to?
- >"Oh uh...Discord."
- What? Why? Wait are you cheating?!
- >"No no! The Discord trapped in my head."
- Twilight how is that possible?
- >"Umm...alternate universes Anon?"
- Oh right.
- >Discord comes back
- >"Alright...thought that one would have been a little more entertaining...but nope. Okay last battle of the first round! 15 vs 16!"
- >The wall shows the battlefield
- >You see the three Anons on one side and the creep hugging the lung on the other
- >Then he puts it down on a rock and pulls out a machete
- >"FIGHT!"
- >Almost instantly, the angry one of the three Anons charges at the lung guy
- >The softy calls out
- >"Wait a minute! I don't think that's a good idea!"
- >Only a grunt responds to him
- >The angry Anon runs up to him and throws a punch
- >The weird one ducks and pulls the machete up, stabbing through the angry one's midsection
- Oh shit...
- >The softy screams out
- >"WHY DIDN'T YOU LISTEN TO ME?!"
- >The angry Anon falls over
- >"F...fuck you..."
- >The softy looks at the ground and holds back tears
- >Then his fists clench
- >"Who do you think you are hurting us like that?!"
- >He storms over to the crazy Anon who is now licking the blood from the blade
- >The crazy Anon swings the blade at him but he ducks and tackles him to the ground
- >They wrestle on the ground until the scary Anon grabs the machete again
- >He stabs it into the back of the Anon's neck, killing him instantly
- >Then he stands up and stares at the remaining Anon
- >He is just looking at the two bodies with a shocked expression on his face
- >The psycho Anon approaches him
- >He remains still
- What's he planning?
- >Twilight shrugs
- >The crazy Anon gets face to face with him
- >He still doesn't move
- >Discord's voice comes on
- >"Oh wow, I wasn't expecting this...it seems the remaining Anon has gone into shock..."
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >The crazy Anon grabs him by the throat and lifts him up
- >Then he stabs into the his chest and hoists him above him
- >The blood runs down the blade and all over the crazy Anon
- >He licks his lips and the wall fades away
- >Twilight nudges you
- >"I don't want you to fight him."
- Lets hope not.
- >The door opens and the blood soaked Anon comes in holding the lung
- >He sits on a chair in the corner talking to it
- >"Congratulations fighters! You have survived round one! Give yourself a round of applause!"
- >Everyone is quiet
- >"Fine then. Anywho, time to start round two! Please walk through the doorway and take a seat."
- >You all do and you sit in the corner away from everyone
- >Twilight snuggles against your side
- >"You know...I think we're gonna die here."
- I don't know Twilight. We could get lucky.
- >Discord comes back on
- >"Koombatants 1 and 4 please stand."
- >The shirtless Anon stands
- >He must have gone back to normal when you weren't looking
- >And the white haired Anon stands
- >The room fades to the colesium
- >The environment looks like a jungle now and vines form the seats you sit in
- That's kinda cool.
- >The sky gets dark and the moon comes out
- >The shirtless one does his transformation again
- >"FIGHT!"
- >The wereAnon runs on all fours at the lightning Anon
- >Lighting Anon fires a bolt at him and he falls over
- >But quickly jumps back up and snarls
- >Lightning Anon runs at him and punches him in the gut
- >WereAnon slashes his arm and a tiny amount of blood squirts out
- >He propels himself backwards by shooting lightning from his fingertips
- >Then a bolt of lightning hits him again, healing the cut
- This guy's immortal!
- >WereAnon growls and howls
- >Then he jumps at the lightning Anon
- >He holds up a hand and a barrier of electricity forms around his body
- >WereAnon can't divert his path and hits the barrier
- >After a grand lightshow, he falls down twitching
- >The lightning Anon picks him up and throws him
- >"I know you aren't done yet. Get up."
- >The wereAnon jumps back to two feet
- >He's about eight feet tall
- >Then he howls up to the moon again and digs his claws into the ground
- >He takes off at the lightning Anon
- >Lightning Anon speaks
- >"I'm sorry, but you are too dangerous for your own good."
- >He makes a fist and holds it to his side
- >Electricity sparks from his fist and makes chirping bird sounds
- >You are on the edge of your seat
- >There is a blue streak and the lightning Anon is on the other side of wereAnon
- >And WereAnon isn't moving
- What just...
- >WereAnon coughs up blood and turns to lightning Anon
- >There is a hole right through WereAnon's chest
- Oh my god...
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >Lightning Anon holds up a finger to the sky and his palm out facing WereAnon
- >A bolt of lightning strikes his finger and surges through him, shooting out as a blast from his palm at WereAnon
- >There is a loud pop noise and a bright light
- >All that remains are WereAnon's feet
- >Both your and Twilight's mouths are open
- >The room fades back into existence
- >Discord speaks
- >"Congratulations! Loved the sparks at the end! Now proceed through the door."
- >He does so and the room flashes green
- >"Okay for our next match up...5 and 7!"
- >The Anon with the crab ponies stands and so does the pickle guy
- >The room fades back to the coliseum
- >The pickle guy holds his jar up and swishes the juice in there
- >"FIGHT!"
- >The Anon screams out for them to attack
- >They come flooding out from everywhere and swarm over to the pickle guy
- >But the pickle guy doesn't react. He just pops off the can to his pickle jar
- >Then he splashes some of the pickle juice out and quickly runs away
- >The juice is absorbed into the ground and it shakes, stopping all of the crab ponies
- What the fuck is going on Twilight?
- >"How am I supposed to know?!"
- I thought you knew everything!
- >She facehoofs
- >Then a huge pickle erupts from the ground, sending crab ponies and rocks flying everywhere
- >You see the pickle guy throw his jar at the other Anon who is speechless
- >The instant before it hits him, the pickle guy comes out of it
- >He comes out of the jar foot first and kicks the Anon in the head
- >Then he catches the jar as Anon grabs his head
- >He sparta kicks the Lord of the Crab ponies to the wall
- >The Leader of the krabby poni coughs up blood and manages to stand
- >His vision is blurred
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >Pickle guy opens his jar and dips his finger in
- >Then he touches the ground beneath the other Anon and runs away
- >The ground rumbles and a thick pickle shoots out of the ground up into the Anon's ass
- >He screams and falls to the floor
- >You can barely contain your sides but Twilight doesn't find it funny at all for some reason
- >The room comes back and the pickle guy smiles at everyone there
- >"Erm...Congratulations! I think...not really sure what just happened there."
- >The pickle guy shuffles through the door
- >He's a strange one
- >"Okay so now we have...number 9 and 12!"
- >Twilight gulps again as you stand
- >So does the dragon Anon
- Great.
- >The world changes to the arena
- >Twilight is trembling
- Hey relax. Just put everything you got into it okay?
- >She nods and dragon Anon snorts
- >A tingly sensation occurs in your stomach
- >This dragon guy has to have a weakness of some sort...definitely not his neck
- >"FIGHT!"
- >The dragon Anon rushes at you
- Fuck!
- >You dive out of the way and your shirt is cut open by his claws
- >That was too close
- Twilight! Hold him!
- >She grabs him with magic and you walk up to him
- >You begin slugging on him all over
- >He doesn't even flinch
- >Then his hand breaks through the magic barrier and he grabs you
- >He lifts you up and throws you onto the dirt
- >Your hat comes off but who gives a shit you might die
- >You hear Twilight yelp as you roll over on your back
- >You look and see him dangling her by the tail with his claws next to her head
- >Suddenly your mind actually decides to work
- >You remember back to last week
- ---Last Week at Twilight's---
- >You are sitting on a chair next to Spike
- >"Hey Anon wanna know something?"
- >He's been telling you random things about dragons for no fucking reason
- >Damn kids
- I guess...
- >"A dragons ONLY weakness is his tail. You break that and it's over."
- Cool story...
- >You look at him with no expression and he continues to tell you stupid shit
- ---And we're back---
- >You grab a stone and throw it at his head before he swipes
- >He looks at you and snarls, dropping Twilight
- >Then he slowly walks towards you
- >You struggle to stand and get into a kneeling position
- >He grabs you by your hair and lifts you up
- >Using your super ultra power of luck, you sneeze on his face
- >He drops you and turns, grabbing his face and coughing
- >This is your chance!
- >You bring your fist down as hard as you can on his tail
- >It snaps like a twig and he screams out in pain
- >He falls over with tears streaming onto the dirt and forming a small puddle next to his head
- >Damn that must suck
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >You walk over and pick up your hat
- Dirty...
- >You pat it on your leg and walk back to him
- >You put the hat on and frown on him
- >Then you grab him by his tail
- >He wails and flails his legs
- >One hits you but not hard enough for you to let go
- >You begin to swing him
- >Around and around and around
- >A disgusting pop followed by a squish noise occurs
- >You look down and see only a bloody tail attached to a spine in your hands
- >Then you look over to your right and see his body with a huge hole in it
- Heh...
- >You throw down the tail and the room fades back into existence
- >Twilight falls onto you and you pick her up
- >"Congratulations! Totally thought you were gonna die there."
- >You grunt and walk through the door to a room similar to the other one
- >You sit in one of the machines after you put Twilight in one
- >The gas cleans you up
- >How? Dunno that shit's magic
- >Last time you questioned magic you almost died
- >The cover opens and you stand up and stretch
- >Discord's voice comes on
- >"Number 13 and 16 please stand."
- >The wall fades and you walk to it to watch
- >Twilight comes over too
- >The creepy Anon with the lung and the one who claims to have Discord in his head stand out there
- >The lung guy takes out the same machete after laying the lung on the ground
- >"FIGHT!"
- >The creepy one charges at him with the machete while smiling
- >Discord-Anon just stands there though
- >The creepy one stab him through the stomach
- >But it fades away
- What?!
- >There is a whistle
- >You and the creepy Anon look up to the sky and see Discord-Anon with a machete the exact same size as his
- >"I figure we should make this a fair fight huh?"
- >The other Anon just smiles back at him
- >He drops from the sky and rushes at the creep
- >He swings down on him, but it is blocked so a loud clank sound happens
- >They are locked in a power struggle with the blades
- >Creepy Anon kicks the other one in the nuts and he falls to his knees
- Oh it's over.
- >The creepy Anon swings down on the other Anon's head
- >There is a clank noise
- >Somehow, he knew that was coming and brought his blade up to block it
- >The creepy Anon growls like an animal
- >Then Discord-Anon sweeps him off the ground with a swift circle of his legs
- >He falls on his back and his machete falls right next to his head
- >Discord-Anon holds his blade to creepy Anon's neck
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >He throws the blade and turns around
- >"Come on then."
- >The creepy Anon is obviously pissed and he jumps up and rushes at him
- >The other Anon snaps his fingers and the creepy Anon stops
- What just happened?
- >Then a bucket appears from nowhere and the creepy Anon flies up above it
- >He falls to diced pieces and is put in the bucket labled "Creep"
- >The wall fades away and the Anon walks through
- >You go to him
- I give you my respect man. That was pretty cool.
- >You put out a fist and he bumps it
- >"But...I don't understand. Why are you being nice to me if we have to face each other next?"
- We do?
- >"Do you not know how tournaments work?"
- Uh...of course I do...uh...no.
- >He sighs
- >Discord comes back on
- >"Great job you freaks! Lets step it up to round three! Since there will only be two battles taking place, I've decided to put a handicap on the one I think will be the shortest. Just to spruce it up a bit."
- >The Anon with Discord in his head looks at you and sighs again
- >"Okay now move through the doors to begin."
- >You all do and this room is much smaller than the other ones
- >There are only four of you left
- >The lightning Anon, You, the pickle guy, and that Anon that has Discord in his head
- >"Koombatants number 4 and 5 please stand up."
- >The Anon with the electricity and white hair stands up
- >And so does the mysterious pickleman
- This has to be a good one Twilight.
- >"Sure...but it's not the fight I'm interested in. It's winning back Fluttershy."
- You're starting to sound like you like her or something.
- >"Psssh what? That's nasty Anon! How would that even make any sense for me to like Fluttershy? Even if she is really cute...and smells like flowers..."
- Okay then, lesbo.
- >She punches you in the arm while blushing heavily
- >The world fades away and you are back at the Coliseum
- >Except the sky is red and there are volcanos in the background
- >You aren't sure if they're real or not and you don't want to find out
- >The white haired Anon shakes hands with the Anon holding a pickle jar
- >Then they jump far back
- >"FIGHT!"
- >They both run at each other with their fists out
- >The fists clash and a tiny poof of wind comes from the impact
- Woah...
- >Neither give an inch as they stare at each other
- >Then the Pickle guy tries to sweep lightning Anon but he jumps backwards
- >Lightning Anon puts his hand in the air and a bolt of lightning hits it
- >He channels the lightning between his two hands and then shapes a sword with it
- >Pickle guy takes his jar out from under his arm and pulls out a pickle
- >He points the pickle away from him and it forms into a 10 foot long pickle sword
- >Your mouth drops at the sight
- >They clash with blocks and parries all over the arena
- >Neither one hits the other
- >The lightning sword cuts pickles' sword in half when they clash in the middle
- >So the pickle guy jumps back a few yards and pops open his jar again
- >He jumps high up into the air and splashes the juice in random spots around the arena
- >The ground begins to tremble again and tiny pickles erupt from the ground
- >Followed by giant pickles
- Hey...hey Twilight.
- >"What?"
- Looks like Lightning Anon is really in a pickle now huh?
- >You and Twilight laugh at your fucktarded joke
- >As the giant pickles fly up, lightning Anon jumps on them as stepping stools to get to the falling pickle guy
- >He finally catches up to him and hits him in the stomach
- >He carries him by fist to the ground for a more devastating effect
- >A tiny shockwave occurs when they hit the ground and lightning Anon jumps back a few yards
- >Pickle guy stands up and shakes it off
- >They stare at each other for a minute
- >Then run the opposite direction
- >The pickle guy taps his jar and the barrage of pickles stops
- >They turn and face each other from opposite ends of the battlefield
- >Lightning Anon puts out his hand and the chirping sound comes again as it wraps in electricity
- >The pickle guy holds his jar in his hand
- >They run at each other with incredible speed
- >The chirping gets louder as lightning Anon speeds up
- >The pickle guy keeps a straight face
- >They are about to collide when the pickle guy throws his jar at lightning Anon
- >Lightning Anon ducks and strikes at him with his attack
- >Or so everyone thought, because the pickle guy came out of his jar at the last second
- >He turned, grabbed his jar, and chopped lightning Anon in the back of the neck
- >Lightning Anon falls over unconscious
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >The pickle guy puts down his jar and opens it
- >Then he picks up the unconscious lightning Anon and throws him at the jar
- >The jar sucks him up and there is a loud grinding sound
- >Then it spits whats left of his torn apart body back onto the battlefield
- Holy peppermint crust...
- >Twilight gives you a "the fuck" look
- >The room comes back and the pickle guy walks through the doorway before Discord has a chance to talk
- >"Okay fine then...next battle."
- >You stand up and so does Discord-Anon
- >The arena comes back to you
- >"Well here's the handicap for this one: All magic has been nullified!"
- >The other Anon groans in frustration
- >Twilight looks to you
- >"If you need me just scream my name...I can try to help."
- >She walks to a rock and sits down
- >"FIGHT!"
- >He runs at you with his fist out
- >You block it with your forearm
- >Then you punch him in the stomach
- >He coughs and then headbutts you
- >You step back a second
- >He tries to punch you but you bring your palm up and stop his fist
- >He screams out as his wrist snaps under the pressure
- >He jumps back a few feet
- >You rush at him and swing your leg at his side
- >He grabs it and flips you on your back
- >You kick his arm so he lets go and you crawl away and stand up
- >You stare at each other
- >Then you run full speed at each other
- >Your fist hits his face and his fist hits your face
- >You both remain like that for a second and then draw back your arms
- >You are both out of breath as you stare at each other
- >He tries for a punch but forgets that's the hand that is fucked up
- >You smack it away and he screams out
- >He drops to his knees holding his wrist
- >You sparta kick his head and he falls back
- >Before he can move, you walk to his side and bring your fist down on his lower chest, winding him
- >He gasps for air on the ground
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >You shake your head lightly
- >Then you raise your fist up
- >You punch his chest again as hard as you can
- >Your fist goes in deeper and seven loud snaps happen at once
- >Anon coughs and then blood spills out of his mouth
- >You see a yellow mist come out of his nose
- >It forms no other than Discord
- >"Thank you so much. I can't wait to cause havock back in my realm. Ta-Ta~"
- >He zaps away
- >You stand up and look to Twilight
- >She shakes her head slowly without breaking eye contact with him
- >The room comes back
- >"Congratulations!"
- Fuck off.
- >"Fine asshole. Go through the fucking door already."
- >You scoop up Twilight and head through the door
- >Except there isn't a healing room this time
- >The pickle guy just sits there in this white room on a steel chair looking at you
- >"Hey."
- >You can still see the imprint of lightning Anon's fist on his chest
- Hey...
- >"That was an okay fight."
- >You smile
- Well thank y-
- >"For a beginner."
- >Your smile fades
- >Twilight jumps out of your arms
- >"That wasn't a nice thing to say!"
- >You put your arm out
- It's true. Did you see the way he was fighting that other Anon? That was crazy.
- >Discord speaks
- >"Now for the fourth round!"
- Wait don't we get to heal up?
- >"Nope."
- Why not?!
- >"Because I said!"
- >Well...you're fucked
- >The arena comes back
- >You sigh
- Let's get this over with.
- >You put your hands up in fight position
- >The pickle guy just stands there
- >"FIGHT!"
- >You rush at him and swing for his head
- >He leans back and grabs you by the shirt
- >He tries to throw you but since your shirt had earlier been ripped, it tears off of you
- >You use the time he is stunned to kick one of his legs
- >A loud pop noise followed by an angry groan hits your ears
- >You look down and see that you have kicked his knee back the wrong way
- >He holds it and screams
- >You swing your leg up to his head
- >He stops it with his arm and lets go of his leg
- >Then he punches your pouch of manlyness
- >You fall over in tears and he goes back to his leg
- >Twilight runs over to you
- >"What can I do to help?!"
- >Your voice has reached that of a little school girl
- Get his...hit him with a magic blast!
- >She charges up her horn and fires a thick lazer at him, sending him flying back
- >You crawl over to what he dropped
- >His jar
- >He doesn't notice
- >You stand up
- Hey pickle guy!
- >His head snaps to you
- >You thrust down the jar
- >Hidden by the sounds of his screams, the glass shatters on the ground
- >The pickle guy begins screaming at the top of his lungs
- >He curls up into a ball and begins...drying out?
- >What?
- >You watch as his body shrivels to a wrinkly thing
- >Then its back cracks open
- >And a regular Anon comes out of it
- >He looks exausted but also scared
- >"FINISH HIM!"
- >You grab Twilight and whisper for her to charge up an electrocution spell
- >Her horn glows and you pick her up
- >"Anon! What are you doing?!"
- >You run up to him and stab him in the chest with Twilight's horn
- >Then you slap her flank and she releases the spell
- >The Anon cooks from the inside out and falls over
- >You kneel down to Twilight after pulling her out
- Sorry.
- >You walk over and grab the remains of your shirt
- >Then you rub off the blood from her horn whilst she trembles
- Twilight...
- >"It's...it's okay Anon. I know you wanted to get it over with. And now we won."
- >The room comes back
- >"Congratulations Anon! Please step through the doors!"
- >You and Twilight walk through to a healing room
- >You both get in the machines and get healed
- >You sit up and look over to Twilight who is staring at the ground
- >Probably thinking about that last kill
- Hey...you okay?
- >Her head snaps to you
- >"Oh uh...yeah. I'm fine."
- Sure?
- >She looks away
- >Discord's voice comes on
- >"Got a suprise for you! Hurry on to the next room!"
- >You walk with Twilight through the door
- >It looks like the first room
- >"You may pick two partners to raise from the dead to help you here. Boss stage!"
- Oh crap.
- >You look down to Twilight
- Who should we choose?
- >"The two strongest fighters you saw out there."
- >You sit and think for a few minutes
- I got it. Discord bring back the pickle guy and lightning Anon.
- >"Alright."
- >There is a white flash and they both stand before you, back in their prime
- >They look at each other and then at you
- >Lightning Anon speaks
- >"Why...why are we back?"
- He let me bring two fighters back to help me fight some sort of boss.
- >Pickle guy sighs
- >"I can't believe I let YOU beat me..."
- Let me?! Suuuure.
- >Twilight puts a hoof up
- >"This is no time to be arguing!"
- Sorry.
- >The room fades away and you are in the coliseum again
- >But it seems...bigger
- >Wonder why
- >The sky is a blur of random colors and there are floating mountains everywhere
- >Far off on one little floating rock is a throne and Discord sits there
- >"Ready to face the boss Anon? You have one advantage here. Very little gravity."
- >A huge thing jumps up from the side of the coliseum
- >You look up at it
- >It's another Anon but with different ponies all on his limbs
- >"Your boss! Giant Rapezord!"
- Fuck.
- >"FIGHT!"
- >Rapezord puts an arm down towards you
- >Pickle and Lightning Anon run out of the way while Twilight teleports you to another spot
- >He punches at the spot and the Celestia on his arm squeals
- >Wait...how are they on him
- >You look closer and see a clear liquid running from her
- Oh that's fucking gross.
- >Pickle Anon runs up his arm and kicks him in the Flutter-err...helmet
- >He steps back and jumps up
- >You jump up too, afraid he would stomp back down and kill you
- >You're all floating now
- >But you can swim through the air
- >Lighting Anon takes advantage of this and flows through the air like a bolt of lightning in a slowed camera, leaving a streak behind him
- >He smacks into Rapezord's chest
- >It does nothing
- >Literally nothing happens
- >He just smacks against his chest
- >Rapezord puffs out his chest and sends Lightning Anon flying to the ground
- >But pickle grabs him before he makes contact with the dirt
- Twilight, give me a push!
- >She throws you with magic
- >You fly straight at his arm just above Luna
- >The same thing happens, you just smack against it
- >A wave of pain hits your body when he swings his arm and throws you
- >Twi catches you with magic and brings you back
- >Rapezord flies at the ground and stomps it with Cadance
- >She lets out a huge moan
- >The ground rumbles and huge chunks of it fly up at the four of you like bullets
- >Twi casts a bubble shield around you and her while Pickle Anon and Lightning Anon dodge them or break them
- How are we going to even do damage?!
- >"I don't know!"
- >The barrage of rocks stops and Lightning Anon holds up a finger and puts out a palm like before
- >A lightning bolt hits his finger and pulsates out of his palm as a blast
- >It hits his Luna and he wails out
- >Twilight screams out
- >"That's it! The ponies! Beat them first!"
- >Pickle Anon nods and pops open his jar
- >He takes out a pickle and throws the jar to Lightning Anon
- >"Hold this for a second."
- >Lightning Anon looks at the jar afraid but still catches it
- >Pickle Anon holds the pickle out and it begins to glow green
- >Then it stretches and grows
- >It has become a pickle buster sword
- >The buster pickle
- >He holds it out to the side and flies at Rapezord
- >Rapezord swats his Cellyarm at Pickle Anon but misses
- >Pickle Anon brings his buster pickle down on Luna, cutting off her head
- >Ponyzord screams out as Luna's vag stops tightening and slips off of his hand
- >His hand is pruny as an eighty year old nutsack
- >You stop yourself from throwing up and continue watching
- >Rapezord falls back and pickle goes for his Flutterhelmet
- >But Rapezord kicks pickle Anon down to the ground with Chrysalis
- >He slams agains the ground and makes a crater
- >Lightning Anon zooms down
- >You can't see what they're doing but Rapezord holds out Celestia to them
- Twilight! We have to do something!
- >"Uh...Uh...I've got it! I'm going to throw you!"
- Wait wh-
- >Is all you get out before you go flying at Celestia incased in a purple saw shaped bubble
- SON OF A BITCH!
- >Your bubble cuts through the middle of Celestia and Rapezord gets down on a knee
- >The bubble turns off but you keep flying
- SHIT!
- >You fly out of the colesium
- >And hit a rock floating
- >Right on your damn nose
- >You push off the rock and turn around
- >Celestia has fallen off of Rapezord
- >Rapezord looks at Twilight
- >Then he flies at her and roundhouse cheeselegs her
- >She goes spiraling to the ground
- TWILIGHT!
- >What are you doing? It's not like she can hear you anyway
- >Pickle Anon and Lightning Anon finally get up and look over
- >They can't see you because you're so far out
- >You hang your head
- I can't believe I'm being forced to watch this...
- >Pickle Anon and Lightning Anon lock arms
- >They start spinning around
- >It becomes so fast that it creates a tornado of electricity and brine
- >They steer the tornado to Rapezord who tries to swing at it
- >He misses and Cadance gets grinded up by the shocking vinegar twister
- >Rapezord yells out again and tries to swing a leg up at them
- >He hits Pickle Anon with Chrysalis and he goes flying to the coliseum wall
- >KO'd
- >Lighting Anon holds out his arm and you hear the familiar sound of birds chirping
- >Then he flies at Chrysalis
- >There is the blue streak and then she explodes in a red and black mess everywhere
- >Lightning Anon stands there trying to wipe off blood and Rapezord sees him
- >He steps on him
- >There was nothing but gore left
- >Shit
- >A purple lazer hits him on the only pony left
- >His Flutterhelmet
- >He grabs it with a hand and says something
- >Then he grabs Twilight with both hands
- >He starts crushing her
- >Her cries and wails finally get to you
- No...I have to win...
- >You sit forward a bit on the rock
- >Then you turn your Ash Ketchum hat backwards
- >Shit just got serious
- >You crouch on the rock and then extend your legs fast
- >You go flying back to the arena with your fist extended out
- >You gain speed as you fly and so much so that your fist almost catches on fire
- >In a flash of red and pink, you tear through the Flutterhelmet on his head
- >He falls over, dropping Twilight
- >You land against the wall and rush over to Twilight
- >She lays still
- Twilight?
- >She moves a bit and groans
- >"An...Anon? Did we win?"
- >A single tear goes down your bloodied up face
- Yes we did Twilight...
- >You scoop her up
- >There is clapping
- >You turn and see Discord clapping on his throne
- >"Wonderful job! You've won! Now you have your freedom, and I will give back Fluttershy. She'll be there when you get back."
- Hold on that wasn't all of it. You said I get an extra prize.
- >"I will grant you one wish. Choose carefully."
- >You turn to the mess of bodies behind you
- >Then you look down to the barely breathing Twilight
- I...I want you to restore everything to the way it was before all of this.
- >"Damn it Anon...well the rules are the rules. Have it your way."
- >He snaps his fingers and everything goes back to normal
- >You are standing at the town center holding a normal Twilight
- >Fluttershy appears next to you
- >She hugs your leg
- >"Oh my goodness! I'm so sorry Anon I thought that maybe one of those other Anon's would love me back..."
- >You russle her mane and put down Twilight
- >"I'm so so so so sorry! Uh um...unless fighting is your fetish...maybe?"
- Are you serious?
- >She shrugs
- >Fucking Fluttershy
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