A Canterlot Wedding pt. 1

>The Doctor has a surprising selection of clothes.
>Some that even fit YOU.
>As you emerge from The Doctor’s wardrobe, you overhear him talking to Pinkie.
>”How do you feel about desaturation?” He asks as he looks her over, moving her head all around.
>Pinkie giggles and puts up with it. “I don’t know, will it tickle?”
>The Doctor smooshes her cheeks. “Absolutely.”
>Pinkie goes off, jumping and hollering. “DO IT! DO IT!”
>As The Doctor sets up a bizarre 1950’s raygun device, you feel the need to ask. “What is this and why are you doing it?”
>After some fiddling, he says. “She can’t just go around being HERSELF, dead and all. I’m going to disguise her.” Without a warning, he activates it.
>You swear Pinkie screams just before she falls to the floor laughing hysterically. Her pink coat and hair fading to a dull grey.
>The ‘desaturator’ or whatever glows a bright pink. “There you go!” The Doctor proclaims patting his apparatus. “I’ll return it when we’re done.... Now Pinkie.... You have to swear to me that you will not not NOT reveal your identity, even to your friends.”
>She nods.
>”Promise me Pinkie,” He says, taking her by the shoulders.
>She goes through the motions and it makes you smile. “Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.”
>The Doctor processes what just happened. “...But do you understand?”
>You put a hand on him. “Of course she does Doctor... She Pinkie Promised.”
>He smiles, “Well ok then, let’s find a parking space.”

>After an INCREDIBLY bumpy landing, The doctor throws the doors open. It’s definitely Canterlot Castle.
>Wait a second... “So,” You start. “This wedding... After it, you’re taking me to my own time right?”
>The Doctor stops dead. “Oh... About that... No, this will be your stopping point.”
>Your eyes bulge. “What?”
>He spins to you with a sheepish smile. “Intersecting timelines and all... So... No. Don’t bother yourself with it, I’m sure it’s fine.”
>You aggressively step towards him. “How long have I been away Doctor?”
>”Oh, not long at all... Only.” His words lost in mumbles.
>You grab him by his bowtie. “HOW LONG DOCTOR?!”
>He shrugs like it doesn’t really matter. “No more than two months....”
>You throw him down and Pinkie has to physically restrain you. “TWO MONTHS! I’VE BEEN GONE FOR TWO MONTHS!”
>He scrambles to his hooves, “It’s fine... I’m sure it’s fine.”
>You stab a finger towards him. “My daughter has been left on her own for TWO MONTHS after I disappeared into the night and everything’s ‘FINE’?!?!”
>You all stand in silence for a moment until a clopping sound down the hall draws closer.
>Your heart leaps as you hear “DAD!”
>Scootaloo jumps into your arms over Pinkie’s head.
>Luna follows behind her. “See? I knew your father was around... Oh, Hello Doctor.” She says turning to that jerk. “Reliable as I expected.” She turns to you, smiles, and gives a wink.

>You hold Scoots tight before she hops away. “Wish I could stay and talk, but Rainbow Dash will need me. She’s going to do a Sonic Rainboom after the ‘I dos’! Going to be AWESOME!” She says as she runs off.
>”As fate would have it,” Luna says after Scootaloo’s out of earshot. “When I contacted the Doctor was the morning after you.... absconded.”
>You give a grunt.
>”I ensured she was well looked after. I told her I required my knight for preparations. She arrived with the rest of your friends not too long ago. Good decision, I see he is as reliable as ever.” Luna says to him.
>The Doctor becomes upset. “OI!”
>She frowns at him. “I was imprisoned in the MOON!”
>He waves a dismissive hoof. “I freed you....”
>Luna raises her voice. “After a thousand years! I went insane and actually BECAME Nightmare Moon.”
>He shrugs and shakes his head. “You obviously got better, I don’t see why you’re so cross.”
>She looks like she’s about to say something else, until she spots something, or rather somep0ny behind you.
>Her smile returns, “Well hello, you are?”
>Pinkie thinks for a moment. “Inky... I’m Inky Pie. Pinkie’s sister.”
>Luna’s smile doesn’t fade, “Greetings Inky. Your sister was a very brave and wonderful p0ny... We all miss her dearly.”
>Pinkie smiles and nods, you’d assume she’d be blushing if all her colour hadn’t been drained.
>”So my knight,” Luna says back to you. You’ve already met the groom. Your ‘good friend’ Shining Armor. I think it’s time you met my niece.”

>You’re taken through a set of halls and corridors.
>Despite your many visits to Canterlot, the castle is still unfamiliar territory.
>You walk confidently besides Princess Luna. “Is Twilight around? How has she been?”
>Ever since Twilight became Luna’s advisor, you’ve seen precious little of her.
>”Twilight Sparkle is fine. She has been rather busy attending to her brother.” Luna says as you step outside.
>The sky is tinted the oddest pink.... That’s not the sky.
>The Doctor stares up. “Is that a shield? That’s why landing was so rough.”
>Luna nods. “Yes, there has been threats made against Canterlot. Extra precautions had to be made.” She turns to you and smiles. “Of course, I always feel much safer with my knight at my side.”
>You return her smile. “What is thy bidding my Princess?”
>She giggles. You’re sure if this was a true medieval setting, you’d be executed for making a princess giggle. “I want you to look after and escort my niece Cadence, the bride... There she is in the garden, would you like me to introduce you?”
>You wave Luna away. “Come on Princess, you know I’m a p0ny person. I can handle this.”
>Luna nods and you see her walk back to the castle arguing with The Doctor again.
>You approach the pink coated and multi-colored maned unicorn... no, pegasus... no both.
>Dropping to a knee before her, you say in your best respectful voice.. “Princess Cadence, I am Sir Anon and I have been appointed your personal escort.”
>That’s got to have impressed her....
>She looks down at you with quite the pissy expression. ”YOU can call me Princess Mi Amore Cadenza.”
>Wow... what a bitch.

>’Princess Mi Amore Cadenza’ goes about her bridal duties. Her first stop is Applejack and her backing.
>You open the door and Bitch Cadenza enters the kitchen without a word to you.
>Oh Applejack. It’s only been a few hours for you, but to her, you’ve been gone for months.
>Not surprising that when Applejack sees you, she disregards the royalty in the room and heads straight for you.
>”ANON!” She shouts as she runs into your unexpecting arms.
>Now you’re covered in flour, but you don’t care at all. “Hey AJ, sorry about that... I was unexpectedly pulled away.” You say, running a thumb across her cheek and giving her a kiss.
>The Princess clears her throat and Applejack snaps back to her. “Oh, ahm sorry Princess... Just hadn’t seen mah special somehuman in a while.” she chuckles.
>The Princess nods slowly.
>After a moment of awkward silence, Applejack shows off her pastries and baked goods.
>The princess seems impressed... at least you think so. She’s so damn cold to the two of you.
>After trying some treats the two of you prepare to head out.
>AJ hands you a small bag of some of the things she’s been baking. You kiss her on the head before following the Princess out.
>As you leave and close the door, she turns to you and takes the bag from your hand.
>”We’re going to check on my dress next and I don’t want your food near it.” She says, floating the bag back through the kitchen window and out of sight.
>What could Shining Armor see in her?

>Ah Rarity and her brainy specs.
>Looks quite appealing in them, you have to say.
>”Oh Anon!” She shouts with a smile. “Good to see you!”
>You introduce Princess Mi Amore Cadenza.
>The dress looks lovely.
>Well it’s a Rarity design, but this one’s especially nice.
>The two discuss the fineries of fashion and you space a little.
>You’re snapped out of it after a discussion about the train length.
>”Anon dear,” Rarity says. “What do you think?”
>What the hell do you know about dresses? “I... like the colours...”
>The Princess rolls her eyes, “What would HE know about wedding dresses?
>BITCH!

>You grudgingly walk her home.
>As you open the door for her, you see Twilight and Shining Armor talking in the front room.
>Armor sees you at the door after greeting his fiancee.
>”Anon, how have you been you big jerk?” He says as he steps around the Princess.
>You enter and scoff at him. “Been doing alright, how about you you traitorous dog?”
>He lowers his head in a mock fighting stance. “Takes one to know one I guess....”
>You two stand off for a moment before laughing and playfully swatting at each other.
>Yeah, he might have been one of Celestia’s loyalist generals, but he was the one to sign the Loyalist surrender AND helped you foil an assassination attempt against Luna.
>”How have you been? What have you been up to? Aside from marrying a Princess and all...” You ask as you two stop acting like children.
>He rolls his eyes. “Not much... Captain of the Royal Guard... Maintaining that force field thing you saw outside. You?”
>You give an impressed whistle. “Ok, glad you’re keeping yourself occupied. I’ve just been doing my thing down in P0nyville....”
>You two are interrupted by the Princess. “Shining Armor dear, can I see you in here?”
>He excuses himself.
>That leaves you and Twilight.
>You beam at her. “You must be so happy your brother’s getting married.”
>She nods. “Oh yes, I’ve heard so much about you.”
>You chuckle, “Yeah I guess I’ve changed since last time we talked. I’m like a whole new person I guess... Where’s Spike? I’ve missed the little dude.”
>She smiles and winks. “He’s away on special Dragon duties... An ambassador of sorts.....”
>You’re both distracted by raised voices from the other room.

>You and Twilight... ‘investigate’
>Miss Princess Mi Amore Cadenza sure isn’t happy about something.
>”I just don’t see why....” She says to him, stamping a hoof.
>Shining Armor cuts her off. “Because it’s important, to me, to Luna.”
>”They’re BOTH the reason we couldn’t....” She sneers at him.
>”Cadence, I’m not going to.... OW!” He drops to his knees, holding his head. “I... I need....”
>She shakes her head and turns.... Where you two are.
>”Cheese it!” You whisper to Twilight.
>She turns to you and tells you to go.
>You’re out into the night before she catches your snooping action.
>Something’s fishy...
>And you’re going to be calling somep0ny the fuck out tomorrow.
>You run into Pinkie, she tells you The Doctor had to take off for a while. Something about how the shield interfered in the schism boobly babble and needed to take in internal cruise control wingle wangle.
>You don’t tell her what you saw, or what you have planned... This won’t make you the most popular one around... But you know it’s what needs to be done.

>Here you go. Through that door.
>They’re practicing for the actual wedding tomorrow.
>Gonna do this, might as well do it in style right?
>Armor, shield, sword on your belt for good measure.
>Swaggin’
>Here goes nothing.
>”Stop!” You shout.
>Everyp0ny mumbles in shock.
>”Armor, Princess ‘Mi Amore Cadenza’ is no good for you.” You come forward, right up to her. “She’s been disrespectful to my friends, rude to me, and refused to help you when you were in pain last night.... I may have been eavesdropping.”
>Cadenza’s eyes quiver and fill with tears. “You... You start a war and take him away from me for two years... almost kill him... and now you’re trying to ruin my wedding.... THAT’S why I hate you!” She shouts before running off, crying.
>As she leaves, Shining Armor storms up to you. “Anon! Do you want to KNOW why she didn’t help? It’s because ever since I started casting this shield, I’ve been getting migraines and TWILIGHT’S been the one healing me so Cadence can focus on the wedding... On her own I might add.”
>He storms off to console his wife to be as your friends filter around you giving you murmurs of anger and disgust... Even Applejack and Scootaloo.
>All Luna has to say to you is how disappointed she is.
>The only one that stays behind is Twilight.
>You apologize to her. “I’m sorry Twi.... I made a big mistake.”
>She smiles at you and for a moment, you think she forgives you. “Yes, you did.”
>Her eyes flash green and you’re surrounded by fire.
>The last thing you remember is screaming to her as she laughs maniacally, and you being phased through the castle floor.