the truth

[FNG] Protogenic: not just the intro to drugs, meeting you, hurting jon, all of that. but about how much the demons inside showed.. im pretty sure its very obvious im not a person who operates well under stress and i know in the blink of an eye i vent it all out in the only way i know and it never is pretty. Its only been a year but i can say for sure that sophmore year was the darkest time of my life. I run away from stress usually or find another way to circumvent it and was not mature enough then to care/realize about what i was really doing to myself and others...
[FNG] Protogenic: then i submitted my well.. what remains of friends to my view on everything just about. and i dun goofed.
[FNG] Protogenic: i know theres something wrong with me and i want to say i have been trying to fix it
[FNG] Protogenic: its just.. this loose end and the constant reminder of how fucked up i am and what it can do to people
[FNG] Protogenic: really makes me cringe and i cant stand it anymore
[FNG] Protogenic: it was nice to run away from it all and be independent for the summer but like i said.. things happened and i saw that who i really am can change and im going to do my best to do so
[FNG] Protogenic: so this is my down to earth honest apology to you which... was well overdue
[FNG] Protogenic: as youve already said..
[FNG] Protogenic: and if i get any feedback from this at all, i just hope that i can atone, im not asking that you talk to me again ever at all or anything, i just want you to know.. i fucked up and im truly sorry
[FNG] Protogenic: its really sad that something similar to what i had done to you and jon that year had to have happened to me for me to understand what i had done. and there will be no more running away, or excuses
[FNG] Protogenic: just what i think and feel
[FNG] Protogenic: for once.. the truth