Advertisement
Not a member of Pastebin yet?
Sign Up,
it unlocks many cool features!
- *Ring* *Ring* *Ring*
- "Myughh... fuck off alarm clock."
- >You awaken in a groggy daze.
- >The morning sunlight entered uninvited into your room through the window, signaling that its time to wake up and get ready to take on the day.
- "Snooze damn you..."
- >You turn to your left and grab the small analog clock off the counter next to your bed.
- "How do I... fuck'n thing..."
- >You shuffle the clock around in your hands, at last finding the little button at the top to stop the insufferable clanking of the little bells.
- >After a few short moments, you finally manage to turn it off.
- "Fuck it. I'm awake."
- >Rolling out of bed, you stretch, scratch some key areas and make for the bathroom.
- "Gotta pee gotta pee..."
- >When in doubt, whip it out.
- "Ahhh..."
- >The first half of your morning ritual is already complete.
- >Time for a hot shower.
- "Little cold, mostly hot."
- >Turning on the shower head, you let the water warm up before stepping in.
- >You strip down and fling your boxers into the corner near the door, adding to the pile of dirty clothes sitting and waiting to be attended too.
- >You step in the shower, getting blasted by streams of steamy water.
- "AH!"
- >The initial feel of the hot water always stings just a wee bit.
- "Ahhh...that. Is. Better."
- >Never takes more then a moment to turn into a soothing feeling...
- "Whadda I gotta do today, whadda I gotta do..." You ponder out loud, still waking up. "Fuck'n, gotta talk to Mayor Mare, go see Rarity about my order then- WHAH!"
- >You slip backwards, latching onto the ledge of the small window on the wall next to the shower.
- >Your foot swings upward and bangs into the nozzle.
- "Owe, Fuck! God!"
- >A big ass rumble made you slip, felt like something hit your house...
- "The hell was tha-" you stop and stare in awe out the window, "Oh my god..."
- >A massive eye peered in, staring directly at you.
- >"Hi Anon!"
- >Oh god its Sauron!
- "Wh-what the actual fuck!?"
- >You stammer back, tripping over the tub in the process and ripping down the shower curtain.
- >"Hey, no language like that anymore remember? Twilight said so!" The eye says, "I'll tell her y'know!"
- >Wait a tick... that voice is familiar.
- "Hold on... who are you?"
- >You sit up, the shower curtain partially covering your nakedness.
- >Uhhh, duh. Its me, Rainbow Dash, your friend..." She looks down at your exposed waist, "Hehe, good morning to you too."
- >What?
- >Oh hell! Morning wood go away!
- "Ahh! F-fuck!"
- >You quickly cover yourself with the shower curtain, rising to your feet and wrapping it around your waist.
- >You can hear Rainbow's giggling outside, her size making her voice a damn stereo.
- >You say nothing else, only retreating from the bathroom back into your bedroom, slamming the door behind you.
- "What the fuck?!"
- >You feel the house rumble, she must be moving around up there.
- >Better not break anything. Took forever to save enough bits to get your own place!
- >You rush over to the window, looking upward to see if you can spot her.
- "Did...did she leave?" You say to yourself, hoping she was gone.
- >"Nope!"
- >Her eye returns.
- "Nyahh holy crap!" You fall backwards.
- >"I'm still here!" She says cheerfully, "Anon, why are you using a shower curtain as a towel?"
- "Why the hell are you giant?!" You shout back, "-HOW- the hell are you giant!?"
- >"How are you not outside yet?" She asks, "The sun came up like an hour ago!"
- "GET OFF MY HOUSE DAMMIT!"
- >"Ugh, Fine." Her eye rolls.
- >The house rumbles again with the sound of giant hooves climbing off the roof, trailing off as they stomp their way to the ground.
- >Little pieces of roof and hay fall to the floor surrounding you as she does so.
- >Looking up, you can see not one, not two, but a fuck-load of little rays of sunlight piercing through what was once your ceiling.
- >You quickly get to your feet and open up the window, seeing a giant blue Pegasus sitting just to the side of your outside wall.
- >"Hurry up and get ready would ya? We gotta have fun today!" She stomps her hoof into the ground when she said that, making the ground quake.
- "Whoa, shit!" You catch yourself on the ledge of the window, "You fucking got house all over my damn floor!" You turn and point back into your room.
- >"Uhhh..." She turns her head, looking into your room. "Heh, sorry. Don't worry though," She waves her hoof, "I'm making your roof my new nest. Its really comfy."
- >Like FUCK she is!
- "Like FUCK you are!"
- >"Relax dude, I can get us free roof maintenance if you want?"
- "Thats not gonna help when you just break it again every day when your sitting up there!" You cross your arms, "No deal!"
- >"Oh yeah?" she crosses her forehooves, "What are you gonna do about it, tiny?"
- >She pokes you with her hoof, knocking you down.
- "Ah, Dammit!" You quickly get back up, angrier now, "I'll take a sharp tree branch or something and poke your ass all fucking night and keep you awake if I have too!"
- >She rolls her eyes again, "Anon, would you just chill out? You'll love having me as a roommate!"
- "Maybe if you weren't like fifty feet tall I would!"
- >"Pffft, whatever." She stands up, blocking the sun, "I'm gonna go do some laps around town. See ya later roomy!"
- >She crouches and leaps into the air, making the earth shake and blowing you off your feet and onto your ass again.
- "God dammit..."
- >Yup. Fuck this noise. Time to start saving up again.
Advertisement
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment
Advertisement