Twilight Clop (a.k.a. BEST CLOP EVER)

>You are anon
>and this is the weirdest fucking problem you've ever been in your life
>let's go back about 30 minutes
>you were toying with twilight
>yes that means what you think it means
>after about five maregasms you decided to put it in
>and for a long time that was going great
>about four maregasms later, and a very peculiar problem came up
>twilight got a cramp
>not just the normal cramp
>she got her cramp in her vagina
>yes this made her very tight
>it also made her hurt a lot
>so much so she can't use magic
>and this is where we continue
>“anon hurry up and take it out”
>apparently your deck is making this cramp gone longer than it should
>so you'll happily oblige
>you pull back
>and drain twilight across the floor
“ummmm, twilight I think we have a problem”
>“gahhh the hell kind of problem could be have with you pulling out”
>I wonder how she's going to take this
“remember how I said you were so tight that it felt like I was sticking my Dick in a Mountain Dew bottle again?”
>“Get to the God damn point anon this hurts”
“when I got hard inside the Mountain Dew bottle, I got stuck”
>“point”
“your tighter my Dick sinew and it's the biggest erection I ever had”
>“get to the point dammit”
>this pain must be really fucking with her ability to think
“I'm stuck twilight”
>you seem look in her eyes as she turned around
>it went from this really really pissed that you were pulling out fast enough, to one of abject horror that you couldn't
>“ahhahh, what are we going to do now”
>well it's not like this information can hurt
“in my world we had a pill that said if you had an erection lasted for more than four hours you should go to a hospital, which made me think that this qualifies as emergency that hospital worry”
>she spends her head around again, deadpan stare
>“anon it's two in the afternoon, there is not a chance in hell I'm leaving the library through Ponyville during the middle of the day when everybody's going to be shopping with you stuck in me”
>okay them what thoughts do you have is because I got nothing
>a mixture of pain intense thinking and time is of the essence does not make for good combination
>“what do we what do we what do we what do we what do we”
“if you didn't spike away we could have had him go get a doctor”
>“anon it's bad enough that he walked on rarity had a casual visit, he doesn't need to be do see me doing you”
“well he has fingers he could at least learn something from me”
>it was your attempt at a joke
>twilight did not find it funny
>then again having someone get stuck inside of you because you have a cramp in you cunt probably takes the jolly mood right out
>she just groans and frustration
>and then you have a bright idea
“twilight I have an idea and you're not going to like it”
>“what idea could I possibly not....”
>That's really all she got out before you jammed your thumb up her ass
>she loosened up a bit, you try to pull out
>she drags her hooves across the ground
>she may loosened up a bit
>but she didn't loosen up enough
>and now she might even be tighter than before
>“what in the fuck made you think that would be a good idea”
“all be honest I thought you were to get tighter...”
>she snapped her head back faster needs those ponylly possible, if you weren't in such a compromising position that look would scare the hell out of you
“... Here me the fuck out before you get pissed, I knew you really get tighter, everyone gets tighter when you play with their ass, but they also relax after a few moments, I thought this would inspire your cramped the calm it tits”
>“well it didn't work”
“well fuck you too, I don't hear any of your smart ideas”
>she looks down with a mix of pissed and dejected in their face
“guess I may as well take my thumb out”
>to which you receive a shocked reply of ”no God for love or Celestia don't”
>curious you just got ask
“you're in pain, my Dick is stuck in you, why do you want my thumb up your ass now”
>“mumble mumble mumble mumble mumble”
“was that speak up”
>“mumble mumble runs mumble mumble Cork”
>you caught two words
>two words you wish would never be in that sentence
“one more time, clear and concise words”
>a sigh
>“you can't take it out because I have diarrhea in your thumb is corking my ass”
>fuck
>fuck
>fuck
“so my thumb is now a butt plug for you”
>you receive a whimper and a nod in return
>fuck my life
>okay anon think
>twilight isn't thinking straight
>she doesn't want to leave the housebrary
>but we need to get to the hospital
>we need something to cover's
>we need a disguise
>and then it hits you
“my Halloween costume from last year”
>“what the hell is hall... Nightmare night, what is your stupid costume have to do with this situation”
>twilight was a bit bitter about that thing after she lost the costume contest you and Lyra
“twilight, the costume is a two pony costume, one of them needs to be human”
>“no shit, I helped rarity make it for you, what does that have to do with the...”
>The gears they are a turning
>“that... That just might work”
>twilight starts walking over to the closet where you kept That shit
>forgetting that you are in her vagina and ass, stimulating herself a bit, and causing a little more pain
“twilight focus we have to walk is one now remember, take it slow”
>the rest your trip the closet is an uneventful
>it was a whole 3 feet away from you but dammit that's 3 feet was hard
>you open the closet and only realize now,
>the costumes can be on backwards
“ummmm twilight I think we have a problem”
>“what now anon?”
“The costume is going to be on backwards”
…
>And in unison you both say
>“shit”
“shit“
>it doesn't discourage you from putting the costume on
>but twilight quickly discovers one thing that we both forgot
>“we made this costume anatomically correct”
>what
“what”
>“there is an eye hole back here for me”
>and then it clicks
>“you're looking out the ass are you”
>while can her face turned red one she's embarrassed
“you don't have to answer you already did”
>looking back at you she's went the pissed again, as you never really get the fuck her again
>I mean outside the cramps this is a pretty fun time,
>but you keep kissing her ass off
>anyways
>you get the costume and
>twilight looks out the Brown hole
>you don't put the head and
“okay twilight this is going to be awkward, this is going to be embarrassing, and if it's found out you may never want to see your face in public again, are you ready”
>nervousness creeps over her face
>“let's just get this over with and forget it ever happened”
“the cramp or the sex”
>“the cramp, the diarrhea. lack of competence afterwords, the horrible ideas that come up, the ass, pick any of them they're all worth forgetting”
>you notice she never said the sex
>you might have a second chance after all
>and with that you're out the door

>Half an hour later
>you have barely made it less than halfway to the hospital
>and every single pony in this whole town stops to ask you questions
>every
>single
>one
>you and twilight endure
>and you move on
>thankfully none of her friends showed up
*whoosh *
>fuck my whole life my whole way of jinxing things
>“I anon...” She says snickering“ what are you doing in that costume”
>let me paint you a picture right now
>you are in an anatomically correct
>horse costume from Earth
>that requires a pony and a human to where
>you have the tail lifted up and tied around your neck
>you are walking backwards
>there is a Brown hole and the marehood walking in front of you scarring any child who happens to see it
>and you are getting so many dirty looks from people who are trying to enjoy a lunch
“rainbow come close I got a secret”
>snickering still she gets in close for this
>and you explain exactly what the hell happened
>from the very beginning
>the nine maregasms
>the cramp
>the thumb
>the runs
>and you've done it
>I believe you just killed your best friend
“yeah fuck you too”
>and you begin your snails pace crawl away
>but not before rainbow gets up and stops you
>unable to contain her laughter
>“hehe.. Wait wait... Let me get some ropes hehehe... I can at least airlift you there”
>you just got to ask
“so airlift or continue to walk?”
>Not even a moment's hesitation, “airlift, get us a platform to stand on and make sure it can't be seen through for obvious reasons”
>with a salute, she's off
“I hope she gets back soon”
>all you can hear from twilight is a small grrr and a whimper that shortly followed
>all in all
>it took rainbow 10 minutes to get a piece of wood ties some rope to it and have you all balance for her and airlifted to hospital, easily cutting your trip by 40 minutes... You came out ahead
>nice
>you're up in the air and by the clouds, the breeze feels nice against your sweating head
>oh shit you just realized twilight underneath this costume
“hey twilight you get any of the breeze”
>“yeah, despite all that's happening right now it feels rather nice”
>the hell is she getting the breeze
>it dawns on you it's going into the anus and cunt
>she's having a reverse fart and queaf blown into her face
>and while that is disgusting and funny at the same time, you can't help but laugh
>“what's so funny”says twilight slightly annoyed
“nothing nothing I'll explain to you later if you still want to now”
>and with that the rest of your airlift is in silence
>rainbow true to her word set you down right in front of the automatic doors of the hospital
>and she sticks around
>you're going to vote that she's always there for her friends and not that she wants to see this train wreck play out
>as you get inside your life strange looks from the ponies waiting
>the human
>in earth horse costume
>walking backwards
>without the had
>tail lifted up
>MareHood and doughnut anus is exposed
>nurse Redheart just gawk's it you
>as you shamble over to her you tell her that you have an emergency
>shaking her head, probably too clear the shock out of her eyes she asks “what's the nature of your emergency”
“can we get a private room before we explain?”
>Apparently can she can sense that something's not right and directs you to the nearest vacant room
>once inside door closed you ripped the costume off
>you are correct that she was gawking before, but a better word for the description her face might have been flabbergasted because that's really what it looks like right now
>you snap your fingers a few times
>and she snaps out of it
>and you begin the rundown
>cramp
>penis stuck
>thumb corking the runs
>and she runs out of the room
“I wonder if we scare her off”
>before anyone to respond the nurse comes back in with a shot
>“this is a muscle relaxant, it should stop the cramp almost immediately”
>just before she jams the needle in the twilight
“wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait”
>immediately it stops
>“why the fuck wait anon”
>yeah twilights pissed
“what will happen with the runs?”
>Red heart looks at you and then looks away
>it's how you imagine a doctor reacting when they have to tell the family that their child's going to die
>you know what's going to come out of her mouth
“rainbow get rarity quick, tell her it's a fashion emergency effect gets her hear any faster”
>hold off on the deal until rarity gets here
>“why  anonymous, this hurts, I want this over with now”
“you really want the first time we have sex with each other to also be the first time we experiment with scat Play”
>her jaw drops
>“hurry rainbow get rarity now”
>again was a salute rainbows off

>Two minutes later rainbow barges in the hospital with rarity
>apparently saying it's a fashion emergency gets her ass in gear
>“where the fashion emergency I can't let this happen”
>and she walks into the room
>you stuck in twilight
>thumb jammed in the donut hole
>red heart watching
>and rainbow pushing her in
>she snaps out of her stupor
>“what... What's going on here?”
>Rarity we need your help
>not letting her get in a word in edgewise you continue
“we need you to create a butt plug in twilight around my thumb so my thumb can exit the anus”
>shock, seriously the anything you can do today that is in the shock someone into not responding right away
>“what.. What makes you.... What makes you think I can do that?”
>She says in the most offended tone she can huffing and get into a the start of a little hissy fit
“rarity if you really want me to say why I know you can do this, I will, or we can take it as I have now and you don't know why I have”
>that little huffing hissy fit look fades from her face into one of horror
>her eyes then turned to squint
>she's looking at you for any sign of your lying
“twilights in pain I wouldn't screw with the right now”
>with that she widens her eyes not realizing that twilight hurt and agrees quickly
>“fine darling I'll do this but you owe me”
“no gems or pastel colors and it's a deal”
>she nods and creates a little plug around your thumb
>you pull your thumb out
“okay redheart give her the shot”
>she gives a determined not and jams the needle deep into her flank just above the cutie Mark
>injecting everything that needle had in it, it takes all of 10 seconds for the vice like grip on your deck to be released
>you pull out fast
>a relieved decide comes over twilight
>you quickly get a fucking bedpan
>in the confusion rainbow in rarity both stare at your junk
>you don't care that rainbows staring at it
>but rarity has a God damn job and she's failing it
>but you make a quick
>you get twilight Bedpan
>enter rarities horror, she sees exactly why you had her make a butt plug
>“my... My.... Magic... Touch...”
>And that's all she could get out before she fainted
>and it's not one of her little dramatic faints either
>she fell on the ground hard
>her head bounced a bit

>Twilights in one bed
>sleeping rarity is in another bad, all parties present decided it would be better to let her sleep than to wake her up immediately
>the nurse said that twilight will have to stay in for about a day for observation because of how long she was cramped for
>rainbow decide to keep her company, apparently she had a daring do book that she had finished yet and they were going to read it to each other
>rarity came back from a CAT scan and show no signs of head trauma
>physical damage none emotional damage, magic touch diarrhea what you think
>all in all, pretty fun day
>these ponies never leave you a moment of rest
>wait
>dammit
>I never get to cum