Cri Log

[19:10:17] <Masaaki_Kagura> Cri, do you think I should leave ES?
[19:12:58] <Koishi_Komeiji> rose and I have been talking about it. but not for the reasons you might be thinking. I don't think the envoronment is a good one for you right now. It's less of a leave and more of a take a break so you can feel more secure in both yourself and your writing.
[19:13:33] <Masaaki_Kagura> Alright Cri.
[19:13:49] <Koishi_Komeiji> ima say something that i've observed okay? it's not a bad thing it's juts something to keep in mind okay?
[19:14:18] <Koishi_Komeiji> the large number of people makes you feel nervous. You don't want to be left behind when something is going on so you get nervous and that sometimes causes problems.
[19:14:46] <Koishi_Komeiji> I think it might be too many people for you to be comfortable right now. HOWEVER we're setting up a thing for you
[19:14:56] <Masaaki_Kagura> A thing?
[19:15:09] <Koishi_Komeiji> something for some smaller scale RP so you can focus and have fun without the pressure of a big group until you get more comfortable
[19:15:19] <Koishi_Komeiji> this is completely your choice though okay? I'm not telling you to do anything
[19:15:23] <Koishi_Komeiji> its juts been a worry
[19:15:50] <Masaaki_Kagura> I've just been..not feeling welcome at ES with ecverything I say being taken as whining or excuses.
[19:16:07] <Masaaki_Kagura> I'll take anything as long as I have RP and can enjoy myself.
[19:17:30] <Koishi_Komeiji> well the problem is not that so much as the fact that we have so few players. When RP does happen sometimes people want to have smaller RPs. With just a few characters and such.
[19:17:58] <Koishi_Komeiji> i'm sorry i'm not wording very wel.
[19:18:07] <Koishi_Komeiji> i'm stuffed from thanksgiving and just a teeny bit drunk
[19:18:11] <Masaaki_Kagura> It's okay.
[19:18:26] <Masaaki_Kagura> You know my birthday is coming up again now.
[19:18:33] <Koishi_Komeiji> (not drunk enough to declare my love for everyone and flop into a pile of mush anyway)
[19:18:37] <Koishi_Komeiji> mhmm
[19:18:54] <Koishi_Komeiji> but what do you think about that? taking a break
[19:19:14] <Koishi_Komeiji> away from the pressure of the community (and null) so you can de stress
[19:19:31] <Masaaki_Kagura> Sounds like a plan. I just...feel so useless there right now anyway, and no one is there anymore. I miss you, Cri.
[19:19:52] <Koishi_Komeiji> part of the issue is null. Sayu is gonna deal with him
[19:19:59] <Koishi_Komeiji> and also i have lots of homework and stuff
[19:20:16] <Koishi_Komeiji> i've scarcely been able to keep up with my stuff
[19:20:32] <Masaaki_Kagura> I figured. ;w;
[19:20:45] <Masaaki_Kagura> I'm just at a loss at this point.
[19:21:13] <Koishi_Komeiji> its okay. you just need to re establish your foundation
[19:21:17] <Koishi_Komeiji> i've noticed something
[19:21:36] <Koishi_Komeiji> you're much better in RPs involving 2 or 3 people total rather than large groups
[19:21:53] <Koishi_Komeiji> so lets focus on that for awhile okay?
[19:22:05] <Koishi_Komeiji> you have all your friends in skype so feel free to chat there
[19:22:13] <Koishi_Komeiji> but stay away from ES for awhile.
[19:22:15] <Masaaki_Kagura> Alright? So...where and when is this gonna happen?
[19:22:41] <Koishi_Komeiji> like...we'll probably do it skype based since its easy
[19:23:02] <Masaaki_Kagura> Sounds like a plan.
[19:23:26] <Masaaki_Kagura> So do we need to create a group again?
[19:23:44] <Koishi_Komeiji> kinda yeah or revive the old noe
[19:24:07] <Koishi_Komeiji> we're gonna just do some nice RPs. various fun and silly things. doesn't have to be canon
[19:24:11] <Koishi_Komeiji> doesn't even have to be touhou
[19:24:39] <Masaaki_Kagura> Okay.
[19:25:41] <Koishi_Komeiji> keep it clean though, okay?
[19:25:43] <Koishi_Komeiji> :3
[19:25:45] <Masaaki_Kagura> I just...my bans have screwed me up. I can't act on anything because of my fear of screwing up again.
[19:25:48] <Masaaki_Kagura> I know.
[19:26:03] <Koishi_Komeiji> lets fix that fear a bit okay?
[19:26:03] <Masaaki_Kagura> Save the NSFW for the Steam Groups, I know.
[19:27:00] <Masaaki_Kagura> Alright. That fear has just hindered me and made me be on the defensive all this time.
[19:27:36] <Koishi_Komeiji> and masaaki. in the future when everything is calmed down and you're not stressed try to avoid talking about inactivity during exam season/work time/holidays
[19:27:45] <Koishi_Komeiji> everyone is in a thanksgiving food coma righ tnow
[19:28:23] <Masaaki_Kagura> I know, I know. It's just nothing changes throughout the year is all. Like it or not everyone is always busy and unable to RP. That's how I feel.
[19:29:44] <Masaaki_Kagura> Then when I speak out everyone gets at me to get a life, a job, a driver's license,, things like that. It gets old.
[19:31:34] <Masaaki_Kagura> You want to know one RP I honestly enjoyed. That RP you and I did together.
[19:31:57] <Koishi_Komeiji> well why don't you tell them that you want to get a drivers license? its a good experience
[19:32:05] <Koishi_Komeiji> even if you don't use it learning to drive is a good thing
[19:32:26] <Koishi_Komeiji> or do the bus thing
[19:33:00] <Koishi_Komeiji> a job is good too. It feels good to do a lot of hard work and then someone hands you some money
[19:33:03] <Koishi_Komeiji> it feels good to earn it
[19:33:06] <Koishi_Komeiji> :3
[19:33:23] <Masaaki_Kagura> I say that, but then they go tell me things like tell your mom you want to and stuff like that. My mom's going to say I'm not ready yet, and think that I'm being pressured and all.
[19:34:28] <Masaaki_Kagura> There are hardly any buses here nowadays too.
[19:35:41] <Masaaki_Kagura> Anyway I'll brb, nighttime prep.
[19:36:38] <Koishi_Komeiji> if you feel you're ready
[19:36:45] <Koishi_Komeiji> then you should tell her
[19:36:49] <Koishi_Komeiji> if you don't then you don't
[19:36:59] <Koishi_Komeiji> but she might be a little too protective.