A Helping Hoof P12

>You are Chrysalis, queen of the changelings, and the mastermind of the nearly successful plot to overthrow the throne.
>And you are walking hand in hand with the key to your new plan.
>In fact, you just got done with being kissed by this significant character.
>It was pretty nice.
>You are Chrysalis.
>And…WHAT IN THE WORLD IS GOING ON.
>THIS IS NOT GOING ACCORDING TO PLAN.
>THIS IS NOT GOING ACCORDING TO PLAN AT ALL.
>You were supposed to drain him of his love, and give birth to more changlings.
>To supply love to your people so that they may recover from this past defeat.
>Not…go on adventures with him to find his…loved one.
>You don’t go on adventures!
>You’re your people’s mother!
>You don’t help random strangers!
>…
>Come to think of it, why didn’t you just turn into the pony he loved and drain him right there?
>Why such an intricate plan in the first place?
>Things are getting out of hoof, quickly.
>And you’re really in no mood to stop the ride, it seems.
>You sigh slightly.
>The two of you walk…hoof…hand in hand through the forest back to the griffon.
>This…this was not what you expected at all.
>It was nothing like the gloom and doom deception that you were used to.
>This felt…different.
>A good kind of different.
>”So…Chrys…do you know this voodoo pony or whatever?”
>Truth is that you don’t. You know of her general location, and that she exists, but beyond that you’ve never met.
”No…not really. But she’s sort of a local legend among these parts I believe.”
>”Well, that’s great. Let’s just ask for directions then. I’m sure nop0ny would ever question the only two humans in Equestria, who are both exiled from the kingdom.”
>He looks at you and smirks.
>You smirk back.
“And you just said nop0ny.”
>His face goes blank for a moment.
>”Fuck…did I really?”
>You nod and giggle slightly.
“Regardless, Anon, I know she’s in the Everfree Forest. What’s the worst that could happen?”
>You are such an incredible liar; you don't even let the fact that you're absolutely terrified slip out whatsoever.
>You don’t go on adventures. Your last adventure was conquest, and it failed.
>Mostly you stayed at the hive, spawning changelings and plotting schemes.
>This was something new.
>And newness was scary, especially if it involved a certain haunted forest that was full to the brim with creepy crawlies and evil creatures that wouldn’t think twice of attacking you.
>Yes, you were Queen, but without love, you were a pretty average unicorn as far as magic went.
>You could scare off a hungry timberwolf or something small with your magic, but not much more.
>You were probably screwed if you were to try this alone.
>But Anon’s here and he can keep you safe, right?
>You look to him, his uneasy visage probably hiding some kind of inner strength.
>A lesser p0ny…man would have given up far sooner.
>But he didn’t.
>He’s right here…with you.
>You grip his hand a little tighter.
>You were safe.
>You approach the clearing where the griffon ‘landed’.
>It was more like he crashed gracefully, but whatever.
>He also seems to be asleep, a raspy snore coming from his gnarled beak, curled into a feathery brown ball exactly where the two of you left him.
>You sigh and call out to him.
“Herny, wake your lazy feathery butt up, we’re departing once more.”
>He shifts slightly, a large yellow eye opening lazily.
>”Eh? Back already? An’ I was jus’ driftin’ off too.”
>He rises slowly, brushing a few leaves off of his wings.
“We’re headed to the Everfree. Give us a lift and I’ll consider your debt paid.”
>He blinks at you.
>”Ye…ye mean it?” he says warily, turning to face you.
>Herny was one of your finest mercenaries, but owed you a great deal of bits.
>You were eager to oblige them, as you knew exactly how to twist his beak.
“Honest. I might even forget where your family roosts. Maybe.”
>You snicker, noticing Anon giving you a rather puzzled look.
>”Do you really have to threaten him like that, Chrys? I mean, shit, he’s just flying us around.”
>You roll your eyes and flip your hair out of your field of vision.
>He wouldn’t understand, but that’s okay.
>He’s just a human, after all.
“It’s just business, Anon. It’s not like I’d actually hurt them or anything”, you whisper to him.
>It felt bad to lie to him, but you’d already come this far.
>”Yeah, well, fucking with someone’s family isn’t really funny. Just saying.”
>You shake your head at him.
“Oh calm down, will you?”
>”I ain’t gonna wait all day, you two. Daylights a wastin’” Herny says, lowering himself to the ground as to give the two of you easier access.
>Anon approaches the griffon, stops, and turns towards you.
>”You think…I could ride up front? Or whatever?”
>Herny laughs, coughing a bit afterwards.
>”I’d watch it, meatbag. I’m prone to bitin’.”
>You send him a dirty look but he ignores it, motioning for Anon to get on with his neck.
“Go ahead, Anon, it’s alright. It’s not like you’re steering him or anything.”
>”That’s a good thing because I’ve never even ridden or a horse or anything.”
>…a horse?
>Does that mean there are ponies on Earth too?
>But why are they called ‘horses’ and not ponies?
>His land is indeed strange, but…it would be nice to visit, you think.
>Maybe.
>”You coming, Chrys?”
>There Anon is, atop the Griffon without your help, though you can tell he’s a little uneasy and very uncomfortable.
>”You ever thought of getting a saddle or something?”
>Herny turns his head nearly 180 looking right up to Anon, his beady little eyes attempting to bore a hole into the human’s face.
>”Ye’d be wise to never speak of saddles or even that I let ye ride me at all, meatbag.”
>Anon shrugs and you smirk.
>You guess that he doesn’t know that people don’t go around riding things around here.
>It was a little normal for you, as you liked to be carried around on a palanquin when you were tired of walking.
>It was good to be queen, after all.
>You climb up Herny’s leg and sit yourself behind Anonymous, making sure to scoot close to him.
>You actually weren’t used to riding things either, and even though you’d been in this form for a while now, it still took a little bit to get used to sometimes.
>You wonder idly how Anon does it.
>Humans are quite the creatures.

>You are Anonymous
>And this is the closest you’ll ever get to riding a griffon.
>Technically you WERE riding  griffon before, but this time you’re the pilot.
>Except you’re not really steering him or anything.
>…
>Well you’re not going to let that spoil your fun.
>His spine is even more uncomfortable than riding passenger, the bony old bird’s skeleton seemingly on a quest to ravage your sack.
>No amount of adjusting is able to stop its infernal quest, sadly.
>Well this was probably not going to be that long of ride, wherever it is you were going.
>Chrys is sitting incredibly close to you, behind you.
>You expected her to completely embrace you, pushing her (lack of) boobs up against your back and just making this ride THAT much better.
>Or worse.
>You were still sort of at odds with yourself about this whole thing.
>You didn’t want to be labeled a cheating scumbag, but goddamnit.
>Extenuating circumstances, right?
>And holy shit you were alone.
>You have to have someone to help you in this world.
>It’s only been a little over a month after all.
>”Where’re we goin’ Queenie. I ain’t got all day.” Herny asks, clawing at the ground impatiently.
>”Just take us to the edge of the Everfree. Preferably where nop0ny notices a griffon and two humans on a little adventure.” She calls from behind you.
>You don’t turn, but you can tell she’s smiling.
>”An’ then you’re gonna let me go, aye?”
>Let you go?
>Then how in the world are you going to get back to…what was the village called.
>Something with a K?
>”Of course you silly bird. Like I’d really hurt your clutch. Baby griffons are adorable.”
>She giggles playfully, a sound that is a bit alien.
>You figured her some kind of conniving seductress.
>It sort of looked like she was warming up to you though.
>Almost on cue she leans forward and puts her arms around your waist, just barely resting herself against her back.
>Just as sudden, Herny takes off in his own haphazard fashion, the liftoff shaking and rattling you around.
>You grab a handful of feathers and squeeze your legs tight.
>This was different.
>And altogether terrifying.
>Crystal seems to feel you tense up and tightens her grip on you, holding you close in a makeshift hug/safety belt.
>”Anon, you’re fine. He wouldn’t let you fall anyway.”
>You can barely hear her over the flapping of Herny’s wings.
“A-are you sure? I mean he doesn’t seem to like me that much.”
>She leans her chin on your shoulder, a slight hint of hot breath hitting your neck and causing all manner of goosebumps and blood flow shifts.
>”I like you. Isn’t that good enough?” she whispers in her bedroom voice.
>Or at least that’s what you think she’d sound like.
>Thankfully your nethers are in too much pain to give any response.
>This fucking griffon needs to put some damn muscle on him.
“I…like you too.” You respond shakily.
>She responds by squeezing you slightly harder and nuzzling into your neck.
>”If ye’d be kind enough to not get anythin’ all over me feathers, queenie?”
>He turns, glaring at the girl behind you.
>Was she…?
 “Uh, Herny, watch the damn sky please.”
>He turns his beak your direction, still flying forward.
>”I don’ need ta watch th’ damn sky ta know where I’m goin’, meatbag.” He croaks at you, coughing slightly.
>Crys simply giggles.
>Herny narrowly avoids a low flying tree, causing the two of you to latch on to bird and human, respectively.
>Your stomach lurches violently as he banks hard to avoid the obstacle.
>As if the flight itself wasn’t bad enough, it had to have turbulence.
>He finally turns back, and rises into the air a little higher.
>”I was jus’ testin’ ya.” He shouts to the both of you.
>Crystal lets go of you slightly.
>”There’s a clearing over there, Herny, just…set us down. I don’t think Anon’s feeling well.”
>You weren’t really, but were trying to hide it.
>How could she tell?
“I…didn’t want to say anything but...” you whisper back to her.
>Your body tenses up slightly as Herny banks again towards the clearing.
>Yeah, there’s not much holding back if he keeps this up.
>What the hell though, you weren’t sick earlier.
>Maybe it was that mystery meat from the other night.
>Of fucking course the only meat you’ve had since coming here makes you sick.
>Herny swoops down into the small landing area, raking the ground with his talons as breaks.
>You thank him by slamming into his neck with your body.
>You complete the embarrassment by pulling out a few of his feathers.
>Crystal fares no better, squeezing your poor innards in a poor effort to hold on.
>Herny himself actually doesn’t seem to be alright with all of this, and slides roughly on his side, throwing the two of you loose.
>You don’t have time to react as you’re sent hurtling from the eagle headed taxi cab in a rough roll, your clothes just barely protecting you.
>They were dress clothes, not adventuring gear.
>Damnit Rarity.
>You stop rolling, and lie there panting, grabbing a hunk of grass as if it’d help you stay still.
>Your body is wracked with sickening dizziness and you close your eyes as hard as you can.
>If you don’t move, maybe you won’t hurl.
>Don’t hurl don’t hurl don’t hurl.
>”Anonymous!”
>Crystal rushes to your side, where you lay on your stomach breathing slowly.
>”Anonymous are you alright? Damnit Herny, you old bag of feathers! I swear if he’s hurt you’ll…”
>You hear the flapping of wings and a harsh chuckle.
>“Oh and you’re just going to crash land and leave us here? Oh you had better be glad I’m not feeling overly vengeful right now you stupid wretch!” She yells at the bird, her normally playful voice thick with acid.
>Herny says something to her that you don’t catch…and you think he just took off.
>Well, you’re stranded again.
>Sick as all fuck and probably cut up and bruised.
>Such is your life.
>She huffs loudly, cursing at the air quietly.
>You lay flat, scared to move.
>She walks back over to you, kneeling down and resting a hand on your back.
>”Anonymous…are you hurt? I know the ride was…less than perfect.”
>You groan in agreement.
>”Come Anonymous, we should hurry up. The forest is not a fun place to be at night.”
>You lie still, refusing to move.
>Fuck all that, you’re not about to blow chunks in front of the girl you’re falling for.
>Not a lot of options here.
>She shakes you slightly.
>It helps in a negative manner.
“Chrys…sick…stop…” you manage to mumble through a mouthful of grass.
>”Uh! Can I help? Are you okay?”
>You hear her rise and shift a little.
>”I’ll…um…go get you some water.”
>You hear her walk away slowly.
>Where the hell is she going to get water?
>Whatever, that’s not important.
>With much effort, you manage to lift yourself up with your arms, though the movement does little to quell the raging ogre in your gut.
>You need to release this torment.
>Thankfully, your body is in a good enough mood to where it is more than happy to oblige.
>After a bout of dry heaving, you finally do the deed, as it were.
>Exhausted, you rise to your feet just as Chrysalis approaches you from the forest.
>”Anon! Oh my god are you okay?”
>You sway slightly, struggling to keep your balance.
“Fine. Water?” you say, your throat making your voice sound raspy and pained.
>She kneels down to your level and hands you a little metal flask of water.
>You don’t move, simply looking at her.
>”Oh. Right.”
>She unscrews the cap and shakily offers the edge to your lips, barely tilting the tin of water.
>The cool liquid enters your mouth slowly, washing the sickening residue down your throat.
>Crystal pulls the flask away after a moment and recaps it.
>”Are you okay, Anonymous? What happened?”
>You  take a deep breath and wipe your mouth with your shirt.
>You’re not feeling 100%, but it was a solid 80% at least.
>Fuck yeah.
>Water.
”I’ll be alright I think.”
>She offers a dainty hand and you gladly oblige.
>You rise and flash a weak smile to her as your body wobbles slightly.
>”Looks like we’re on our own now, Anon.” She says, turning to the forest, her eyes showing a small amount of worry.
“Don’t worry Crys, there’s nothing in that forest to be scared of.”
>”I hope you’re right Anonymous. Come, I think I know the way.”
“Didn’t you just say you didn’t?”
>She motions to a little dirt path not far from where the two of you are standing.
“Oh.”

>You are Rarity.
>And this is probably the worst idea that you’ve had to date.
>You start out from Carousel Boutique, with no real direction.
>All that you knew was that Anon was missing.
>That’s all that Raritan said that they knew as well.
>First things first though, you’re severely out of booze, and even if you didn’t have a plan, you should at least stock up.
>There’s nothing worse than a dry mare.
>You giggle to yourself as you make your way to Berry’s hole in the wall.
>Her ‘shop’ was basically a shack that seemed to be fashioned out of whatever wood she had lying around.
>She refused anyone’s help in making it look prettier, and you had to admire the girl for that.
>It was the worst looking ‘building’ in Ponyville.
>Regardless, Berry somehow kept a magnificent stock of various wines and spirits, usually ice cold.
>Berry was not a unicorn, and her talent was to create wine.
>You usually shrugged the coldness as a matter of ‘magic’ and left it at that.
>After a few moments of drunken gibberish from her side, you’re able to partake of a few fine beverages for the road.
>One travel-gallon of Cider, from Berry’s own reserve.
>You’re not quite sure where or how she managed apples away from Applejack and her family, but again, this was Berry we were talking about.
>One bottle of scotch, seemingly four years old.
>Also your favorite.
>One bottle of wine, a Riesling from the Crystal Empire.
>…on the back of the bottle it said “Brought to you straight from the Crystal Empire! I don’t even know how I got there, but their grapes were amazing!”
>…Berry went to the Crystal Empire before the lot of you even knew of it?
>There’s no possible way. This had to be some kind of made up selling point.
>Lastly you grabbed a flask of gin.
>For emergencies.
>Berry also let you try a concoction of hers on the house.
>Something she liked to call “really good stuff”.
>It was in a small clear bottle, the liquid a viscous green.
>You accepted it, but Celestia be damned if you ever get desperate enough to drink something viscous.
>…you did drink cough medicine though.
>That doesn’t mean a thing.
>That was Sweetie Belle’s fault.
>She was probably the reason Anon ran away too.
>Hmph.
>Alright, we have our supplies.
>You fish out the gallon of cider and start sipping at it through the handy straw in the top.
>You really liked straws.
>You wonder if there was a way to make a crystal straw?
>Now that would be amazing.
>What were you doing again?
>Hm.
>You decide to take a stroll.
>It’s still morning, probably around 10 or so.
>Celestia’s sun is high in the sky and shining down on your brilliance.
>”Rarity…what in the world happened to you?”
“Eh?”
>You turn and see Twilight, who seems to be carrying her own little rucksack of supplies.
>Of course, they’re books.
>But books and booze both start with Bs, and that’s brilliant.
>You giggle again.
>”…are you okay Rarity? You don’t look…uhm…alright.”
“Nonsense Twilight, I’m perfectly fine. I’m just out…what was it that I was doing?”
>She looks at the massive jug in front of you.
>”Drinking cider in public at 11 o clock in the morning?”
“Besides that, darling. I have a feeling it was…oh yes! Anon!”
>Twilight looks at you incredulously.
>”Anon? What about him?”
>Oh right, she doesn’t know he’s missing.
>Well, you’d keep it a secret for now. It seemed the lot of them didn’t like him to begin with anyway.
>How dare they treat him like that at the castle?
“It’s nothing Twilight. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got something important to do.”
>You take a long drag on the cider and start to depart the purple p0ny’s vicinity.
>”Wait Rarity, please. Can…can we just talk for a little bit?”
>You turn and lower your eyelids at her.
“What  now, Twilight?”
>She levitates a book out of her sack and floats it over to you.
>”I…found a book that I think might help you a little.”
>You take the book and glance at the cover.
>”Overcoming your Addiction: The Three Step Guide”
>Is this pony serious.
“Twilight…why do I need a guide on overcoming addiction?”
>You see her eyes dart down to the large mug in front of you.
>You sip from your straw loudly.
>”Isn’t it obvious Rarity? Look at you…you’re a mess.”
>You instantly glower at her.
“Well, I certainly didn’t expect to be insulted by one of my friends on my journey. Good day to you, Sparkle.”
>You heft the book in her general direction and continue on your way, not bothering to look and see if she caught it or not.
>Some nerve on that p0ny.
>Calling YOU of all ponies…
>A MESS.
>You take another long draught of your cider, smacking your lips together.
>Damn good cider that was.
>”Rarity…I’m sorry. Look.”
>Twilight is following you but you try and ignore her.
>”I’m just…worried about you. You’ve been distant lately and…well…”
>You take another sip, roll your eyes, and turn back to the lavender unicorn.
“Twilight, as much as I’d love to stay here and chat, I’ve very important business to contend. Now unless it’s something pertinent…”
>”Pinkie wants you to go to her party!” Twilight suddenly shouts, causing a few birds in the nearby tree to flutter away.
“…I beg your pardon? A party for what exactly?”
>Twilight giggles nervously.
>”Just…ya know. A party. To make up for the one that was so um…stressful the other day.”
>Stressful is sure one way to put it.
>But you have no time for a party.
>You take another sip on your cider.
>Or you would, if the straw would suck up any more.
>You rattle the cup and of course.
>Of course it’s empty.
>You toss the empty flagon to the side, roll your eyes again and sigh.
“I don’t have time for a party, unfortunately. I need to be going.”
>”Wait…Rarity…”
>With a purple flash she teleports in front of you, startling you even though by now you should be used to it.
>She teleports EVERYWHERE.
>”Please…your friends miss you. We miss you.”
>You flip your mane dramatically.
“Miss me? Did you not just see me last night?”
>She looks a little downtrodden.
>”I mean... you haven’t spent much time with the rest of us since you and Anon started becoming a thing…”
>OH
>IT
>IS
>ON
“You’re going to tell me that I’ve ignored you?! You’re all just jealous of me and Anon! I should have known that it would have come to this. Hmph. Now excuse me, I must be off.”
>With your blood pressure soaring and your face contorted into a scowl, you stomp away from Twilight.
>However, your vision starts to undulate as your body wobbles uncharacteristically.
>Not a few steps away from Twilight do you find comfort in the grass.
>You’ve passed out.

>You are Anonymous.
>And whether your manliness will allow you to mention it or not…
>You are fucking lost.
>After the little stunt that Herny pulled the two of you found a little dirt path in the woods and started your trek in what you hoped was the right direction.
>You are beginning to think that not even Crystal knows where she’s going.
>But again, you’re not going to say anything.
>You’re in a land that is 100% unfamiliar.
>You could pretty much say that you were lost in any one location on this damn planet.
>Thankfully you still have plenty of sunlight left to trek aimlessly through this unknown forest.
>You’ve been letting Crystal lead the way.
>You want to say it’s because she’s sort of been here longer and probably would serve as a better guide.
>But you can’t stop watching her hips sway back and forth as she walks, her form fitting dress hugging her small hips graciously.
>You take a deep breath and try not to take the thoughts any further than necessary, lest your boner awaken.
>That fucker was trouble.
>There was also the trouble of stepping too close to Crystal.
>You’d get a whiff of what you guessed were some kind of pheromone based magic perfume and instantly start bonering up the place.
>Why the hell was she wearing that anyway?
>To seduce you?
>Shit it isn’t THAT difficult.
>You grin as you remember the lack of effort it took to fall for Rarity.
>She didn’t even really have to try, actually.
>You just suddenly found her incredibly attractive.
>Then your mind starts to flash of other images, such as your first sexual encounter.
>BONER AT 10%
>SHIT
>”Anon…how long have you been on Equestria?”
>Thank god.
“Uh, I think a little over a month. Why?”
>She turns and smiles warmly.
>”No reason, just chatting. Though…judging from what you’ve said that seems like an awful short time for all of this mess to happen.”
“You’re telling me. I can’t catch a fucking break.”
>”Well…you caught me. That’s good enough, isn’t it?”
>You DID catch her bathing.
>FUCK THAT’S A PUN
>You catch yourself smiling regardless.
“Yeah, it’s proving to be my only saving grace. I really appreciate you coming with me on this crazy journey, Crystal. It means a lot.”
>She reaches back with a wispy pale hand and you grasp it, unsure of her intentions.
>She pulls you closer to her.
>”I think I don’t really mind coming with you. Being next to you is pretty nice, if I do say so myself.”
>OH GOD OH JEEZ
>Every time someone said something cutesy and romantic to you, you pretty much melted into goop.
>And…it seems that Crystal is really enamored with you.
>That was…you weren’t sure how to react to that.
>That’s not to say you didn’t like her as well it was…well…
>There were still the lingering feelings of Rarity lodged in your heart.
>You weren’t too keen on letting them go, but you could tell that Chrys was into you hard, and you were falling for her.
>Who could blame you, she’s human.
>She’s a really fucking weird human, but that doesn’t really mean anything.
>You were pretty odd yourself.
“I think that’s a pretty good idea.”
>She smiles and the two of you walk hand in hand, side by side through the forest.
>You know what, fuck it.
>You can be lost for all that you care.
>You grip her hand a little tighter, eliciting a smile from the dark haired maiden.
>You had someone.
>Someone that wasn’t such a selfish bitch to you, and didn’t want you just for sex.
>And wasn’t an alcoholic.
>…
>You hang your head slightly as the thoughts drift about in your head, lingering like a foul odor.
>That’s not right.
>That’s not you.
>You still loved Rarity she was just…a little troubled.
>You try and bar the negativity from your brain and instead return to the present.
>You are lost, but you’re not alone.
>That’s significantly better than what you’re used to.
>”Anon…I’m sure that you’re aware by now that we’re rather lost.”
>Crystal pulls you out of your internal monologue.
“I’m aware.”
>”…you also realize that Herny was our only way back to Kelethin, without hoofing it.”
>You nod.
“I also think that this whole trip was probably a fool’s errand, but goddamnit I don’t really have a lot of options. What’s the worst that could happen? Ponyville is over there. I’m sure we could find help that doesn’t care about humans.”
>She smiles and rolls her eyes.
>”Ever the optimist, aren’t you?”
“I’m dead, and I’ve lost just about everything, Crystal. All I have is optimism.”
>She squeezes your hand slightly as the two of you wander aimlessly through the forest.
>”Well, I think that I recall she lives rather deep in the forest. This path should lead in her direction. Though I’ve never met her myself.”
>Even more good news.
>You sigh and continue the journey in relative silence.
>It seems like the stories about the Everfree were probably false.
>Twilight had told you that the Everfree was the most mysterious place in Equestria, where monsters and beasts of all types tended to gravitate towards.
>You think you might have seen a bunny, once.
>To be honest, this was probably the most peaceful you’ve been in your short life in Equestria.
>Or is it un-life now.
>Whatever.
>”So…Anonymous…what do you do?”
>You cock your head towards her, suddenly in deep thought.
>The fuck did you do?
>Other than fail and die a lot, it seems.
“Uh…is nothing an acceptable answer?”
>She laughs, her slightly sing-songy voice carrying through the woods.
>”While I can believe it, there has to be something you’re good at. What have you been doing with your time in Equestria?”
>So she wants the truth eh?
“I’ve pretty much done nothing at all. Well, no that’s a lie. Recently I got a job as a masseuse but…it didn’t end well.”
>Oh fuck wait she’s going to ask you to massage her
>”A masseuse?” She says, lowering her eyelids and smirking seductively. “Wow…no wonder. I bet those fingers probably feel like magic on a pony’s body, “
>You can feel her fingers start to caress your hand slightly.
>”You don’t think you’d mind practicing a bit on me, would you?” She whispers, leaning a little close.
>Silence passes as your body tenses up slightly.
>She winks one of her bright blue-green eyes at you, and you swear you could’ve lost it right there.
>One of these moments you’ll get used to the fact that a girl actually wants something to do with you.
>”Besides, you owe me two kisses. Those aren’t cheap, you know.”
“Wait, I owe you?”
>She nods slowly, smiling all the while.
>”You stole two kisses from me, loverboy. It’s only fair I ask something in recompense.”
>Loverboy.
>Oh dear.
>You have to massage a human lady now.
>Oh man what if she gets naked.
>Goddamnit no, we’ve been good about maintaining boner levels.
>…you really wouldn’t be able to control yourself then.
>”…and since I do believe we’re about as lost as can be, maybe we should take a break. I hear some water nearby.”
>Sure enough, in the distance you can hear some water flowing.
>You were parched, for sure.
>Whose bright idea was it to not pack any food or water on this trip?
>Well, you hadn’t really planned on trekking through the forest or having griffon-based crash landings.
>So, you, of course.
>Your stomach gurgles annoyingly.
>And didn’t you just throw up?
>How the hell were you hungry?
>...because now you were empty, and hadn’t eaten since last night.
>At least you were able to solve some of life’s questions today.
>Suddenly your mind flashes elsewhere.
>What if she tries to take another bath?
>Here’s hoping for…
>Both?
>You can’t say that resisting carnal urges was easy, especially when a goddess of a woman (minus the tits) is hitting on you 24/7.
>But…you knew full well that this ‘death’ business was serious shit.
>So far you figured out that only Twilight was able to resurrect you, for whatever reason.
>And if you were locked out of Ponyville, that meant you were pretty much as good as dead if something happened.
>Best not take the risk.
>Unless someone was to ferry your body to some secluded spot and kidnap Twilight Sparkle and force her to shoot her life-magic into your cold body.
>…
>Your brain thinks funny things sometimes.
>The two of you pass through the brush, finally, and come to face with a small stream.
>Surrounded by the woods, and dotted with a few craggy rocks, the stream cuts through the forest with a slight murmur of rushing water.
>It doesn’t look more than a foot deep.
>Good, that means there’ll be no crazy sexy bath times.
>”And besides, you interrupted my bath the other day. I think we can work something out, can’t we?”
>She looks to you with a sly smile.
>Your face is red, of course.
>You’ve had a ton of random sexy nonsense happen since you happened into Equestria.
>You’d think that you’d be used to it by now.
>This place seemed to just teem with sexual undertones.
“…uh…yeah we can figure something out. Maybe.”
>She gives you a slightly puzzled look as the two of you near the water.
>As she steps into the water, her body visibly reacting to the cold, you notice something a bit odd.
>She’s not wearing any shoes.
>Has she been barefoot this entire time?
>”It’s a bit…chilly Anon…care to come warm me up?”
>Uhhh
>Buhh
>Nope, your brain is still dumb.
>You sit down on the shoreline, the grass cold against your thin pants.
>They were dress slacks, not adventuring pantaloons.
>You sigh, thinking about Rarity once again.
>As you undo the laces on your boots, you catch some splashing in front of you.
>The hell is…
>She’s…she’s dancing.
>Her small feet make tiny splashes as she maneuvers about the creek in spirals, and figure eights.
>Occasionally, she would hop on top of a rock, and leap to another in a rather mind blowing feat of grace and agility.
>You watch her; slack jawed, for a good few minutes.
>She seems to be absolutely loving this, for whatever reason, her black dress’ sleeves and skirt flowing past her like tiny capes.
>You catch a glimpse of her emerald colored underwear in the process.
>GOTTA UNTIE THESE BOOTS
>OH MAN THESE BOOTS ARE GOING TO GET SO UNTIED
>Your hands fumble at the laces.
>You’ve been tongue deep in a pony’s behind, why the hell are you freaking out over underwear?
>Before you can answer yourself, your head is suddenly soaked with a splash of cold water.
>Surprised as hell, you look up to see a smirking Crystal.
>”So you think you can steal two kisses AND get a free show? Tsk tsk tsk Anon, you’re being rather greedy today.”
>You wipe the water from your eyes and huff at her, quickly undoing the other shoe.
>She splashes you again, this time just a little bit with a kick of her feet.
>You throw your boot down and rise to your feet.
>She will rue the day.
>You will make her SO wet.
>…
>Wow really brain?
>You dry and drive the thought from your brain as you tread into the icy water.
>It’s the middle of spring and the sun is shining, yet this little creek chills your feet to the bone.
>But the running water does do your tired feet a bit of good.
>And it’d be nice to soak them a little bit IF THIS WASN’T WAR.
>You charge at the wily female, intent on tackling her into the water, but she’s much too spry for you.
>She leaps atop a rock next to you and blows a raspberry at you.
>”Awww…Anon…you can’t even get a girl wet can you?”
>Oh for fucks sake.
>You lean down and send a small wave of water up at her, but of course she dodges it, expertly landing in the water a few feet from you.
>She seemed very light on her feet, this one.
>You suddenly get a rather clever idea.
>Once again you rush at her, your heavy footfalls causing miniature explosions of water where you step.
>She rolls her eyes, and bends her knees slightly as you reach her, probably going to jump away.
>NOT TODAY.
>At the last second you slip a little lower and are able to grab a hold of her legs.
>You wish you could have seen the surprised look on her face.
>And then in that same split second you see the rocks on the bottom of the creek.
>FUCKING GOOD ONE ANON
>DAMAGE CONTROL STAT
>You grip her calves with all your might and manage to spin mid-fall.
>Unfortunately for you, this means you land on your shoulder something fierce, the water doing little to cushion your fall.
>You think you hear something snap.
“FFFFFFFffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckkkkk” You scream out, causing a few birds in the nearby trees to retreat from their roosts.
>”Anon! Anon what’s wrong? Are you hurt? Oh god you’re hurt…”
>You’re soaking wet.
>And in incredible pain.
>You attempt to rise, lifting yourself up with your arms, but you wince in agony as your right arm falls useless.
>You grit your teeth and pant.
“I’ll be okay…can you help me out of the water.” You reply to her, your breathing erratic.
>You reach up a left hand and she pulls you up with a bit of difficulty.
>You try your damndest to not move your arm but you still manage to wiggle it thanks to fucking gravity.
>You look over to the appendage and attempt an assessment.
>Crystal beats you to it.
>”You’re arm…it’s…not supposed to look like that!”
>Keen observation.
>It looks dislocated, but you don’t really know.
>You’re no medical expert.
>But if it was broken, then you would be able to move it.
>Right?
>Fuck how do you relocate an arm.
“I…I think I dislocated my arm. Uh…do you know how to relocate it?”
>She quickly shakes her head no.
>”No I…I don’t know anything about um…stuff like this. Oh god I should find help, hold on.”
>She starts to turn away but you reach out with your other hand to stop her.
“No…don’t go. I think I can do this, I saw it in a couple movies. I’m going to need your help though.”
>She nods quickly, and you acknowledge the desperate fear in her eyes.
>”Anything.”
>You lean on her and walk slowly.
>PAINFULLY SLOWLY
>Back to the shoreline.
>You sit down next to a rock with a little help.
>This is going to fucking hurt so bad.
”Okay…you’re going to have to bend my arm at the elbow for me, and then make an L. Then keep my upper arm straight and pull my forearm slowly outward. It should work.”
>God you hoped it’d work.
>She kneels in front of you, holding out her spindly arms.
>They’re shaking profusely.
>So are you.
>She places her hands on you, and you can feel her twitching still.
>”Is…is it going to hurt.”
>She turns to you, her bright blue-green eyes full of tears.
>You nod slowly.
>You take a deep breath, but there’s probably no way for your heart to slow down any quickly right now.
“Okay…go ahead.”
>She bends your arm, putting a small amount of pressure on your upper arm causing immediate discomfort.
>You grit your teeth.
>She makes the first shape slowly, and you close your eyes.
>Gradually, she starts to move the other direction.
>Your body immediately disagrees with this plan of action, the pain more than enough to convince you.
>You grab a handful of earth in your other hand and attempt to crush it into diamonds.
>Her gentle pace helps though, and she’s trying her best.
>Something wet hits your wrist.
>You open your eyes, squinting.
>She’s crying, muttering something to herself.
”Crys…it’s alright. I’m okay just…go on.”
>She continues, your breathing and pain increasing tenfold as your ligaments disagree with your bone structure for a moment.
>At the apex of this rotation, she turns to you.
”P-push on my shoulder. Try to push it back in.”
>You could feel your own hot tears streaming down your face now.
>With jittery hands, you feel pressure on your bicep and then…
>Something pops.
>And you feel so much better.
>SO
>MUCH
>BETTER
>Good god.
>”Did I do it? Are you b-better?”
>She’s in your face immediately as you try to move the arm again.
>It hurts, and you’re going to have to baby it, but thank god.
“You did amazing, babe, thank you. I’m…s-sorry for-“
>She doesn’t let you finish that statement as you’re immediately hugged with the force of an angry god.
>She wrapped her arms under yours, as to not hurt you.
>How thoughtful, now you’ll have broken ribs as well.
>”I was so worried! Oh my stars I didn’t know what I was doing but you were so brave and…”
“Shh shh shh…no more of that. I’m fine.”
>She sniffles looking at you pleadingly.
>”Are you sure?”
>You nod, taking another deep breath.
>Her frown starts to turn up a little.
>”Did you just call me…babe?”

Meanwhile…
>”W-where do you think she was going?”
>”And who in their right mind would turn down a party!”
>” She musta drank one heck of a doozy.”
>”Yeah I found this weird bottle in her stuff.“
>”Rainbow Dash, put that down. I’m trying to figure this spell out.”
>”What are you trying to do anyway?”
>”…just a little…okay I got it!”
>The sounds of magic fill the air briefly as the spell is cast on the slumbering alabaster p0ny.

>You are Rarity.
>Element of Generosity, and the most fabulous p0ny in all of Ponyville.
>The last thing you remember is shouting at Twilight and…the rest is a hazy blur.
>You shake your head as you open your eyes, your squiggly mane wiggling to and fro.
>You seem to be in Golden Oaks Library.
>Standing around you are your friends, Applejack, Twilight, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie.
>And apparently Fluttershy decided to show up too.
>How absolutely dreadful.
>Wait, something isn’t right.
>”There you are Rarity. You took quite the fall back there.” Twilight says, with a slight smirk
“I…what happened?”
>”You just sort of passed out. But I cast a curative spell on you and it seemed to work.”
>She did what?!
“YOU DID WHAT?”
>You shout to the purple p0ny, your rage beginning to boil.
>”I sobered you up, Rarity. You were obviously too far gone to listen.”
>This can’t be happening.
>You quickly look around for your bags, and see them lying next to Rainbow Dash.
>Berry’s mystery drink seems to be lying next to it.
>Fucking JACKPOT.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Twilight.”
>You shine your magic and levitate the bottle in your direction.
>However, Rainbow Dash interrupts your telekineses, swatting the bottle out of the sky.
>“Hold on there, Rarity, this is an intervention! No more drinking.”
>The bottle crashes against the wooden floor noisily.
>The green slime bubbles caustically as it attempts to eat through wood, leaving Rainbow dash to leap into the air as to get away from the volatile ooze.
“You were going to drink that?” Rainbow cries at you, appalled.
>Using the scene as a distraction, you attempt to rush to your bag.
>Maybe they haven’t got rid of the rest of the rest of your stash.
>You are soon apprehended by violet magic.
>”Get a hold of yourself Rarity! Please.” Twilight asks, approaching you.
“Don’t try and tell me what to do, Twilight!”
>You shout at her, shocking the rest of them.
>”We jus’ want to help sugarcube. There’s no reason to get irate bout it.”
>You turn to Applejack, the rage clear in your visage.
>She is taken aback slightly.
>Good.
>”Wow…Rarity I’ve never seen you like this…is it because of Nonny?” Pinkie asks, the sole voice of innocence in the crowd.
“What do you know about Anonymous?” You sling her way, her baby blue eyes shrinking slightly at your verbal assault.
>”Rarity, what in the world is wrong with you all of the sudden?”
“Like you would understand. Let me go, Twilight.”
>”No, not until you own up to your addiction. It’s destroying you. Look how you’re treating your friends!”
“The same friends that watched my Anon get dragged away!”
>You’re practically snarling at this point, your emotions getting the better of you.
>But you don’t care.
>They took away your happy juice.
>And then they had the GALL to say his name.
>”And he’s part of the problem. How can you not see this?”
>She levitates a mirror over in front of you.
>You quickly fire a magical bolt and shatter it, sending glass flying.
>The others flinch to avoid the shrapnel.
>A fragment flashes by you and cuts your cheek.
“Let. Me. Go.” You snap at her, ignoring the cut.
>Twilight drops you, her pupils dilated and her face wearing a mask of pure grief.
>”Fine. You win Rarity.”
>”Are you sure Twilight? I mean…she looks like she’s gone off the deep end.” Rainbow asks, still protective of your bag.
>You approach her, your eyelids lowered, not budging an inch.
>”Just…be careful Rarity. Whatever it is you’re doing.”
>”Um…I think I have an idea of what she’s doing...” Fluttershy squeaks from behind Twilight, seemingly trying to avoid you.
>She’s not worth your time.
>Not any more.
>Rainbow relinquishes your saddlebags.
>In silence, you don them and step out of the library, making sure to slam the door behind you.
>Friends.
>Hmph.

>You watch Rarity leave the library, the rest of your friends all in various states of grief and shock.
>”What the hay just happened?” Pinkie asks, breaking the silence.
>”I…I don’t know Pinkie. She’s never been like this.” Twilight replies, walking over to the new hole in her floor.
>She magics a patch of wood for the floor and sighs slightly.
“I uh…I think I know what she’s doing.” You say again, trying to be noticed.
>Twilight turns to you.
>”What in the world could cause her to act so…un-Rarity Fluttershy?” She asks, clearly saddened by her friend’s outburst.
>”You’re not going to say she’s a changeling too, are you?” Rainbow adds in.
“No…nothing like that. Um…there were some royal guards that came to my door the other day…”
>You are Fluttershy.
>And you’re actually trying to defend Rarity, the p0ny that used to be your best friend.
>Now she’s so distraught over Anonymous that…she’s acting crazy.
>That probably means one thing.
“…and…Anonymous um…escaped from Canterlot Castle. The Princess has no idea where he is and…I think Rarity is trying to go look for him.”
>”Shoot today is jus’ throwin us curveball after curveball so far.”
>”Why would she go through with this by herself? Why not ask her friends?” Rainbow says with a hint of sadness.
>Twilight hangs her head.
>”None of this is making any sense. Why wouldn’t the princess tell us? Anon is our friend too.”
“Um…I think I know that too. She thinks Anon is in league with the changelings. Disc Ward didn’t say why.”
>”Disc Ward? You mean that creepy guard that was hitting on me the other day?”
>”So hold up, yer tellin me Anon somehow escaped the dungeon at the castle, and the Princess thinks he’s the enemy now? Jus’ cause he lost his temper?”
>”That still doesn’t explain why Rarity’s acting so funny, Fluttershy.” Pinkie Pie exclaims in confusion.
“Well…she’s been drinking a lot. And she just lost Anon. So she’s probably hurting…I know I am…”
>The other four look at you like you’re crazy for a second.
“What?”
>”…I’ll have a talk with her, guys. I think we goofed it up pretty hard this time.”
>”I have a better idea, Dash. Why don’t we help her find Anon?” Twilight says, cleaning up the broken glass and nonsense with a quick spell.
“Um…Disc Ward and Raritan said to leave it to them.”
>”I bet they also told you not to tell us, too, right Fluttershy?” Twilight asks, forcing a smirk.
“Eep…um…oops.”
>The others have a giggle as you shy into your mane.
>But despite all of this nonsense, you’ve finally a means to help Rarity.
>And maybe find Anon in the process.
>”I’m totally one hundred percent super duper okay with looking for Anon. He’s no changeling. He’s just silly.”
>”I’ll go too, Anon’s none too bright. There’s no tellin what kinda danger he’s got himself into.”
>”You can count me in too, Anon needs our help, and if the Princess isn’t going to send aid then we’re going to need the best of the best. Namely me.”
>Twilight rolls her eyes.
>You and the others all look to her.
>”Then it’s a deal. Dash, why don’t you-“
>”That won’t be necessary, girls.”
>You hear a voice from Twilight’s basement.
>”Oh jeez now what. Who’s there?” says the purple unicorn, rolling her eyes and trotting over to the staircase.
>A brown stallion clambers up the staircase, with a goofy grin on his face.
>”Captain Disc Ward. I’m with the COPS. We figured Rarity would try and look for Anon, since Raritan is an idiot and can’t keep his muzzle shut. And since this Anonymous fellow was in close contact with the rest of you Elements, I figured you’d also be worried about him.”
“Um…I’m sorry for blabbing my stupid mouth Disc.”
>”It’s fine, Fluttershy. I’ve sent Raritan to have a chat with Rarity. I just hope to Celestia that he doesn’t screw things up again.”
>”And…what about our plans to go find Anon, Disc, you know you can’t stop us.” Rainbow says, a bit uneasy as Disc’s gaze passes over her.
>Disc turns to Rainbow and breathes a heavy sigh.
>”No, since you’re the Elements of Harmony I can’t really stop you. But as a member of the royal guard, I can certainly help you, if you don’t mind. I can’t let the heroes of Equestria journey alone, now can I?”

Meanwhile…
>You are Chrysalis.
>Or Crystal, as the hapless Anon believes.
>” It was a...a slip of the tongue is all.” He says, still sitting down.
“My my my, Anonymous, you’ve already kissed me and now you’re wishing to slip me some tongue?”
>You really don’t know why you keep doing this.
>Any other target you’d never waste this much time seducing.
>You just keep layering more and more affection on to this affair.
>What’s going on with you?
>You know what though, you’re really enjoying this.
>You’re not about to give up your plans.
>Anonymous was key to your plan.
>And so what if you’ve got him wrapped around your…finger.
>You’re still getting used to this body.
>But…dancing in the creek…you’ve never felt so alive.
>Nothing at the hive compared to the freedom you’re experiencing now.
>You were always accompanied by guards and soldier changelings whenever you went on an excursion.
>Now, you were alone.
>Well, except for Anon.
>He blushes cutely at your remark.
>God this human was fun.
>”…just help me up will you.”
>You offer up a hand and he takes it.
>His hands are rough and worn compared to your own.
>Oh god…to feel those hands on you.
>NO
>You’re not going to give into your base urges!
>Not now, at least.
>Though to be honest, it was getting very difficult.
>He rises, his grip much stronger than yours.
>To feel him push you down and…
>AHEM
>Very VERY difficult.
>His dark shirt is drenched and sticks to his body.
>He wasn’t quite musclebound, and you had no idea if he was tall for his species or not.
>Regardless…this male was attractive. He wasn’t even a pony but you couldn’t help but admire his body.
>”Uh…Crystal? Now you’re the one who’s staring.”
>You shake your head and feel a tinge of blood rush to your cheeks.
“Just…thinking. It’s beginning to get late. I doubt that we’ll find this p0ny any time soon, based on the light.”
>He looks down and checks his wrist for a watch that isn’t there.
>”Oh right.”
>He was also the silliest being you had ever met.
>You figured that was the main reason you liked him.
>Everything about being a queen is always serious.
>Deciding which quadrant of the hive was to do each job, each year.
>Maintaining secrecy amongst all of Equestria.
>Finding and exploring new hunting grounds.
>It was tiresome, hard work.
>You felt less and less like a queen as the days went by.
>And you were still young.
>He looks to the sky.
>”Kinda hard to tell what time it is though. I’d wager around…what 5 or so?”
>You shrugged.
“I’ve never been a fan of time, anyways. It’s never on my side, it seems.”
>”Well, we still have a little while. Maybe we’ll find her…”
>He trails off after that remark.
“…I suppose you’re thinking ‘what if we don’t?’”
>”Well, yeah. I mean…what if all we do is stumble around the forest? This place seems pretty harmless, but forests are never very fun at night.”
>You nod in agreement.
>It was actually rather odd.
>You hadn’t encountered a single creature of note since the two of you venture into the forest.
“I’m sure we’ll figure something out, Anon. Who is going to mess with two humans in the forest? I mean, look at you. You’re packing.”
>You pat his arm lightly, but he jumps back, wincing.
>OH SHIT
“Oh Anon I’m sorry! Are you still hurt?”
>He rubs it gingerly.
>”Yeah, but I can move it still. Just, be gentle alright.”
>You can’t believe he hurt himself at your expense.
>A rocky creek wasn’t that much of a danger to you when you were in your own form.
>You had your chitinous skin to protect you
>You guess humans were a little flabbier.
>But…why would he do that?
>He doesn’t even know you all that well…
>If he was a guard of yours, you’d of made him take the blow and then…
>You DEFINITELY wouldn’t have helped him fix a dislocated shoulder.
>…it was damn obvious Anonymous was turning you soft.
>”So…uh…I can’t help but notice you’re barefoot.”
>You cock your head confusedly.
>He starts to strap on his socks and boots, doing it slowly as to not injure himself further.
“Um…yes? What of it?”
>What an odd question.
>”Just an…observation I guess.”
>He’s still avoiding looking at them.
>…maybe…?
>He stands and looks into the distance.
>”I think we’re still lost. You know, for the record.”
>You take the chance and run your foot up his leg, trailing your toes against his skin.
>Humans had nails, which you found interesting.
>You made sure he felt a little of them.
>You can feel his body shiver slightly through your foot.
>”Uh…Crys…not that I’m going to tell you to stop or anything, but we should probably get going.”
>You also notice some movement in his pants.
>You giggle to yourself.
“Lead the way, babe.”
>He rolls his eyes at you and starts the trek down the path the two of you were on earlier.
>A brief thought flashes in your mind all of the sudden.
>Maybe…this could last.

>You are Anonymous.
>And the trek through the forest is tiring you out far more than you had ever realized.
>Between the injury, your pretty horrible luck, and your now ever growing hunger, you’re starting to wonder if this was worth it at all.
>You wanted to be with Rarity, but goddamn, this is one hell of an adventure just to get her back.
>You had only known her for a while anyway, right?
>You figure that you’ve been walking for a while now.
>Maybe an hour, maybe two.
>You passed the time with a bit of chitchat, but it seemed like Crystal was keen on just holding on to you and walking.
>To be honest, that was perfectly fine with you.
>It was perfectly amazing to be able to just walk in the forest, in silence.
>Especially with a beautiful girl at your side.
>You’re starting to see an orange glow on the horizon.
>And your stomach is VERY upset with you.
>You’ve been trying to ignore it for a while now, but shit’s rough when you’ve been walking nonstop for a while now.
>And you’re injured.
“Crystal…uh…hate to ask but have you seen anything edible on the way here? Fruit or…fuck even a bunny or something?”
>She raises a finger to her chin, tapping it in thought.
>”No, actually. Are you hungry?”
“We’ve been walking for a good three hours and we’ve been on this hairy little adventure for longer. How are you NOT hungry?”
>She simply shrugs.
>Fucking vegetarians, holy shit.
“Well, I’m bloody starving and I’ve gotta find something to eat. You mind helping.”
>”Not at all. So just find some berries or something, right?”
>You nod.
“I’d prefer something a little more substantial, but Equestria isn’t really known for having McDonald’s  on every block like back home.”
>She blinks at you.
>Wait.
>Don’t you fucking tell me she doesn’t know what McDonald’s is.
>She can’t be from such a back assward place where they didn’t even know what a McDonald’s is.
“…Starbucks?” You say, attempting another well-known branch.
>”What are you talking about Anon?” she says, shaking her head in confusion.
“Just…just drop it alright. Uh, I guess you take the left I take the right. Meet up in a little bit and holler if you find something.”
>”Uh…before you go, is fish okay?”
>Fish?
>Fuck yeah fish is okay.
“Yeah, if you can find some. But I didn’t gauge you much of a fisherman, Crystal.”
>She nods happily and trots off into the forest.
“Don’t be too long, alright?”
>”Of course not, babe.”
>She blows you a kiss and with a wink she disappears into the forest.
>Great, now she’s using that against you.
>You turn and walk into the woods.
>You’re not going to find anything in here.
>You could eat leaves, right.
>That’s calories…cows eat leaves.
>You’d seen ponies eat leaves.
>You look up at the trees.
“No, I think I’d rather starve thanks.”
>After a little bit of fruitless searching, you finally give up.
>Fruit would be good about now too.
>You find an old log, and decide to take a seat for a little bit.
>You needed a little alone time to think.
>So this bitch is from some place in Europe, okay. That’s fine.
>You knew some people from Europe.
>But at least they knew what McDonald’s and Starbucks was.
>She didn’t wear shoes.
>Had fangs.
>Crazy hairstyle.
>Crazy ass eyes.
>Some sort of magical perfume that turned you on.
>And of course a weird as fuck dress.
>Rarity would give her the makeover of a lifetime.
>…something doesn’t add up and you’re really not sure what to think of it.
>Well…you are in magical pony world.
>What if…now this is just an idea.
>Now bear with me.
>What if.
>Now hold on.
>What if…
>”Anooooon!~ I found something!”
>Crystal’s cry echoes through the forest, and doesn’t seem to be too far off.
>Maybe you should ask her in person.
>You don’t have anything at all to lose, anyway.
>Wait, yes you do.
>Her.
>FUCK.
>Okay, whatever, just…you’ll find time.
>Nothing was really pertinent any more, anyway.
“Coming!” You call in the direction of her voice.
>After a little, you come to the little path.
>Light is fading pretty hard, but you can still make out the dark haired beauty’s form.
>”I found a little stream and um…caught a fish.”
>She stretches out her arms and…lo and behold.
>It’s a fucking fish.
>Raw, and dead, but still.
“Wow Crystal, I’m proud of you. How the hell did you catch it?”
>She rolls her eyes and flips her hair out of her face, smiling coyly.
>”Magic, obviously.”
>You facepalm briefly, and take the fish.
>It’s not incredibly large, but it’ll do.
>Probably much better than whatever the hell was in that stew from yesterday.
“Okay, I’m going to need to find some firewood and a clearing to cook this thing. After that abomination of a stew from yesterday-“
>”You seemed to eat it rather happily.”
“-I’d rather not get sick again.”
>You give her the most neutral face you can muster.
“So come on, we’re losing light. I have a feeling we’re going to have to camp out tonight. And these wet clothes need some place to dry or we’ll probably catch hypothermia or something.”
>She nods and follows you, eagerly reaching for your non-fishy hand.
>You let her have it, and the two of you venture forth.
>Today seems to be looking bright for you.
>You may have a new, albeit confusing, girlfriend.
>And she’s actually a human(?).
>Not a pony.
>Luckily, not a little further down the path do you find an abandoned campsite, complete with a firepit.
>This is probably a pretty well traveled path, so of course there’d be campsites abound.
>There’s even a little rocky rise in the land that you could set up as a shelter with a little work.
>Time to put all those Survivorman episodes to good use.
“Okay, Chrys, since you seem to be good at finding random shit in the forest, see if you can gather up some dry shit and some wood so I can build a fire. I’ll start to set up a shelter of some kind.”
>”Um…its going to be dark soon, you know. Are you sure you’ll be okay alone?”
>Why the hell is she asking you that, shouldn’t you be worried about her?
“Well that gives you reason to hurry, if you’re so worried about me.”
>She smiles and waves, walking into the forest.
>”Whatever you say, babe.”
>You could probably get used to that.

>You are Raritan.
>But you can’t be Raritan.
[spoiler]Because you’re already Raritan[/spoiler]

>So instead, you are Rarity.
>And you can feel your blood practically boiling.
>They had the nerve…the AUDACITY to accuse you of not only addiction, but that it was Anon’s fault?
>Deep breaths, Rarity.
>It’s not worth it.
>It’s not worth it.
>They’re your friends…they don’t know what you’ve been through.
>They don’t know Anonymous like you do.
>And they don’t know that he’s gone.
>You can feel the tears welling up already.
>Gotta keep it together.
>You exit the Library and…at this point it’s probably wise to just go back home.
>Anon’s probably okay.
>You look to the sun and…how long were you out?
>It seems to already be setting.
>Maybe Celestia is closing down shop early today.
>Yeah right.
>You fish through your packs and find your emergency gin.
>This seemed like an emergency.
>But it was GIN.
>Gin always made you mean and ornery.
>But it was so effective at giving you a buzz.
>You open the flask and pour a bit of the libation into your throat.
“EUUUURUUUGH”
>You hack and sputter as the foul liquid makes its terrible way down your throat.
>This was horrible gin.
>You turn towards the Boutique.
>It’s going to be a long walk home…
>Alone.
>Oh Celestia where’s that gin.
>With a hacking gargle you manage to force down another swig.
>You wipe your mouth with a grimace.
>This isn’t working.
>As you near your home, you notice a white Pegasus standing out front.
>A white Pegasus with a curly yellow mane.
>Oh no.
>”Oh hey Rarity!”
>Raritan.
>He excitedly trots to meet you.
>If you rolled your eyes any harder they’d likely fall you.
>You take another swig of the gin.
>You regret it.
>You gag and damn near choke on the foul liquid.
>This REALLY isn’t working.
>You hope the rest of your ‘supplies’ made it in your bag.
>”Disc told me you were going to go on an adventure, so he told me to help you out.”
“No adventures today. Go away.”
>He shakes his head.
>”Can’t do that, maam. Royal orders.”
>You walk by him and into your room.
>You make sure to close the door with a slam, but he seems to catch it.
“Raritan, I did not allow you into my abode. Please, if you’d kindly see yourself out…”
>”I was also told to…um…keep watch over you.”
“…Royal orders?”
>He nods enthusiastically.
>Why does Celestia hate you all of the sudden?
“Sweetie Belle, are you home?”
>”I’m in my room. Don’t open the door.”
>Well we can’t have that.
>You trot over to her room and…she’s locked it.
>Or well, she has something in the way.
“Raritan is here. He’s going to cook us supper. Would you like some?”
>”Wait, I can’t cook!”
“Well it’s not like you’ll force a lady to cook her own meals, now would you?”
>You flash your sapphires his direction and of course it works.
>…it worked really well on Anonymous too.
>”I’m not hungry.” The fillie replies.
“Nonsense, you’ve not eaten all day Sweetie. Come on out.”  You call to the door, a bit more sternly.
>A bit of silence passes and shuffling of items is heard from inside.
>The door opens and Sweetie Belle steps out, looking defeated.
“Now…be a dear and help Raritan cook, would you? I’ve got a bit of business to do.”
>”We both know that’s a lie. You haven’t had a customer since Anon started living here.” She says dryly, the comment hitting you like a slap to the face.
>So you respond in kind.
>You reach out and pap her on the cheek with a hoof.
>”Ow! What was that for?” She cries to you, rubbing her cheek with a hoof.
“Now be a good little filly and help the nice royal guard with dinner?”
>”…Anon would have never let you hit me…” She whispers as she walks by, but she knows you can hear her.
>Your eye twitches, bringing forth the rage from earlier.
“You would be wise to not mention his name around here, Sweetie Belle.”
>She doesn’t even turn to you as she walks away.
>The NERVE on that filly.
>How DARE she talk about your Anonymous like that?
>You’re positively fuming.
>This is not good.
“Sweetie Belle do NOT walk away from me. What did you just say?”
>”Rarity…calm down. She’s just a filly.”
“Of course, darling. My apologies.”
>WHAT
>THE
>FUCK
“I mean…what? No, I’m not apologizing for that! She badmouthed Anonymous!”
>”So what, she’s just a kid, Rarity. Please calm down. You’re starting to scare me.”
>You nod slowly.
“Fine.”
>Okay what in the world is going on.
>You’re sober, you know that.
>That gin wasn’t poisoned was it?
>Why aren’t you acting yourself?
>Is it because of…
“Raritan…I never asked…what is your special talent?”
>”Um…” He starts to think, bringing a hoof to his chin.
>Well his cutie mark was of you…does that mean?
>”I actually never really figured that out. I mean…it’s your face. Does that mean my talent is you? Because that’s just silly.”
“Raritan…tell me to sit down.”
>”…what?”
“Just…do it.”
>”Um…Rarity please sit down.”
>You plant your flank on the ground, your muscles acting on their own.
>…
>”Um…what the hoof?”
>You rise, gritting your teeth in frustration.
>Fabulous.
>Sweetie Belle is being a brat, and there’s a pony that’s special talent is quite literally ‘you’.
>You walk over to your saddlebags and pull out the merlot.
>You pop the cork with your magic and take a swig.
>This isn’t going to be nearly enough.
>Night begins to fall, and after a little organized chaos in your inspiration room to kill some stress, you sit down at the table and pretend to read the paper while Raritan and Sweetie Belle start to make dinner.
>You needed a little time to think on things, and it was amusing to watch the two of them go.
>They’re both horrible cooks.
>During their attempts to make vegetable soup, Raritan managed to cut himself twice, and Sweetie actually managed to burn water.
>It actually was on fire.
>You ran out of merlot WAY too early.
>That just left your scotch, and you were hoping you didn’t have to waste such a good drink on trying to get through the night.
>But…the alcohol wasn’t working.
>Twilight’s spell must of done something to you, because unbeknownst to the other two in the room, you were silently crying behind that newspaper.
>Anonymous was missing.
>And there wasn’t a damn thing that you could do.
>You had the idea of venturing out to find him…but what good could that do.
>You’re just one p0ny.
>And he’s probably captured by changelings.
>…or worse.
>”Rarity…um…do you like zucchini?”
>Raritan asks, breaking you from your concentration.
>You make sure to hide your eyes from him.
>You don’t want to give this guy any ideas on ‘cheering you up’.
“Yes, zucchini is fine.”
>He smiles happily and carries on, chopping away at a green squash with excitement .
>Suddenly there’s a knock at the door.
>You wipe your eyes quickly and start to go for it, but whoever it is opens the door anyway.
>”…Raritan…I’d ask you why you’re wearing a little apron with a heart on it, but I don’t really think I want to know the answer.”
>”Oh! Disc! Isn’t it cute?” He wiggles his tail in excitement.
>You feel the need to vomit all of the sudden.
“Excuse me, why are you barging into my house without my consent?”
>”Because I can, Miss Generosity. Come on in girls, I think we need to have a little pow-wow.”
>Girls?
>In steps Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and lastly, Fluttershy, who steps as if she’s attempting to sneak into your house.
>They all seem to be in varying degrees of apprehensive.
>”Uh…I don’t think we made enough soup for everyone.” Sweetie Belle says while standing on a stool to stir the big pot of soup they’d managed to cobble together.
>”Your daughter is adorable, Miss Rarity.”
“Sister.” You grumble through gritted teeth and glowering eyes.
>Disc Ward remains unphased.
>”Now that I’ve gathered all of you here, it’s about time I spill the beans.”
>”…oh shoot I didn’t put any beans in the soup, Sweetie!”
>”Raritan, please shut up.”
>”Yessir.”
>”Alright. So you all know that Anonymous is missing from the Castle. He somehow escaped, and there were no signs of a forced entry. Now, Celestia has magic wards all over that dungeon, so whoever did it had to be rather magically skilled. We’re, of course, suspecting changelings.”
>He begins to pace back and forth, eying the 7 others in the room with scrutinizing gaze, of course ignoring Raritan.
>If he was about to suspect you as a changeling…oh Celestia help us all.
>You’d destroy him, and everything he holds dear.
>”Which means that Anonymous is in danger, or that he’s been in cahoots with them all along.”
“You have the nerve to barge into my home and-“
>You’re cut off by Raritan, as he whispers a ‘shhh’ to you.
>Stupid magic.
>”I’m not accusing anyone of anything, Miss Rarity, so please calm down. This is a matter that must be dealt with as soon as possible. Raritan and I have been scouring the town for clues and have yet to come up with anything conclusive. So the next step is to try and find the monkey himself.”
>He turns and trots over to you, his visage stoic.
>And then he kneels down on his forehooves in front of you, and Raritan follows suit.
>”Miss Rarity, if you don’t mind, I’d like to help you find your lost loved one. Miss Fluttershy informed me of what happened. I realize you’ve been through a lot lately. It’s the least that we can do. On behalf of the Royal Palace, I apologize for any grief we may have caused.”
>You blink rapidly, in disbelief.
>Here you were, thinking that this p0ny was here to spout anti-Anonymous nonsense and arrest you too for something ridiculous.
>Now you have two decorated royal guards kneeling in front of you, offering their help and…and…an apology.
>You’re in no mood to stop these tears.
>Like a river crushing through a feeble dam, your emotions are suddenly unbarred.
“I…I just…”
>You sputter and mumble as white-hot tears rush down your cheeks.
>You crumble to the ground, burying your face in your hooves as you sob loudly, uncaring for who might hear.
>”Rarity…we’re all here for you. It’s going to be okay.” Twilight Sparkle speaks up, moving closer to you.
“I’m just… I’m so sorry I…”
>”It’s alright Rarity. Get it all out. We ain’t been the best of friends lately, either.” Applejack adds in.
>”Yeah…we’ve all been too hung up on everything else to realize that…well…you kind of really like that big ape.” Rainbow chimes in, as obnoxious as ever.
>”And Anonymous is all of our friends. We wouldn’t want him to come to any harm out there anyway.” Pinkie Pie says, as you sniffle a little, trying to regain your composure.
>That just leaves…
>”Um…Rarity…I…I swear that I’ll never try to hurt you or Anonymous again. I just…want to see you happy again.”
>Activate maximum emotions.
>You wail loudly as your tears intensify.
>Your friends all gather around you, holding you close.
>”It’s going to be okay, Rarity.” Twilight speaks to you softly, petting your mane as to calm you down.
>”We’ll take our leave now. Everyone report to the Library tomorrow at 0800 hours and be ready to travel. I have a feeling that we’re in for quite the journey.”

>You are Anonymous.
>And night has fallen on the Everfree Forest.
>And Twilight was right.
>This place is rustling your jimmies something fierce.
>You’d managed to hit the jackpot on scrounging up supplies, somehow.
>Amidst the forest you found an old cart.
>You soccer kicked the thing apart and fastened together a meager shelter under the rocky outcroppings in the clearing.
>Crystal was similarly lucky, having found a bundle of hay and some kindling for the fire.
>After a painstakingly boy-scout inspired twig-tugging, you actually started a fire.
>This never worked, not in the movies and not on TV, but fuck it.
>Magic.
>Whatever.
>After using a bit of the hay for the fire, you used the rest to make the bed for the two of you a little more comfortable.
>Now, you were just sitting next to one another next to the flickering flames, your fish skewered all the way through on a stick, roasting slowly.
>”So…Anonymous. I can’t help but notice that you haven’t asked me if I was okay with sleeping next to you.”
>She’s right.
>You just sort of assumed, at this point.
“Well, is it so wrong of me to assume that you wouldn’t dare pass up the chance?”
>You were starting to try and strike back at the silky seductress.
>Or at least, trying to.
>”Wow, look who suddenly thinks he’s hot stuff. Fine, then, I accept your offer. On one condition.”
>Oh shit.
>”You’re going to have to get rid of those wet clothes. You’ll catch a cold or something.”
“Look who’s talking, your clothes are just as wet.”
>”And did I ever say I WASN’T going to take them off?”
>…
>INITIATE PANIC MODE
“W-wait what?”
>”What, I thought you were trying to be ballsy, Anon? Is there something wrong with sharing a bed with me?”
>You fidget slightly as she leans into you a little harder, resting her head on your shoulder.
>”Relax, Anonymous. I’m just playing with you. I know your…condition…doesn’t allow you to do anything fun. I’d hate to see something happen to you out here.”
>And with that, you’re panicking internally as well.
>Because you know that you could do something and get away with it, with her.
>As explored by Rarity yesterday, it seems that only actual penetration makes you lose your life force.
>Anything else was probably fair game.
>Probably.
>Thank god the smoke from this fire is making her perfume hard to smell.
>You reach out for the fish.
>Thank god for TV as well.
>Though you’d never used this skill before, and honestly you never really fished, you were able to gut and clean the fish with a piece of rock you’d found.
>Yes, you mangled the poor thing a bit, but fuck it.
>Meat.
>You bite into it, and find it to be crispy, dry, and nearly inedible.
>…you chew a bit and swallow.
“You still have that water?”
>”Of course.” She replies, pulling the little flask out of a pocket in her dress.
>You eat in relative silence.
>Through the crackling fire, chirping insects, and the rustling wind through the trees, you find yourself sitting a bit more at ease.
>You eat as much of the fish as you can, and throw the rest into the fire.
>You guess that’s going to have to last you a little.
>You wrap an arm around Crystal, staring off into the dark forest.
>”Anonymous…” She asks, trailing a finger down your leg absently.
“Yeah?”
>”…do you like me?” She asks, plainly.
“Of course I do.”
>A little bit of silence fills the air.
“Do…you think you could ever…um…love me?”
>You turn your head slowly and look down at the damsel.
>Her eyes are sparkling in the firelight and in them you can clearly see something you hadn’t noticed before.
>There’s a deep emotion in them that…you can’t put your finger on.
>Loneliness? Loss? Confusion?
>You turn the questions to yourself, in kind.
>You were alone, that much was for certain.
>You were accompanied by great loss, both of yourself and the girl who you loved.
>And…through all of this hardship and drama, you were confused and horribly in over your head.
>…could you ever love her?
>You really don’t think that you can even begin to start thinking in absolutes right now.
>You’ve only known this girl for a couple days.
>But…you’d also only known Rarity for a little while as well.
>And all things considered, things have gone a lot more smoothly with Chrysalis than most of your days with Rarity.
>…magical Equestrian nonsense and crazy whack-ass adventures aside.
>So you answer as best as you can.
”Probably?”
>Suddenly you feel a strange sensation wash over you.
>It’s wholly familiar to back when you had those crazy nightmares and it felt like your body was covered in pins and needles.
>Except this doesn’t hurt…it just sort of tickles all over your body like a fine mist of water.
>And as quick as you notice it, it’s gone.
“…did you feel that?”
>You shake your head, as if it was some kind of bad trip.
>”Feel what?”
>She rises suddenly and opens the ‘door’ to your little shelter, crawling inside.
>”I’m thinking it’s high time to call it a night. Keep the flame burning, it’ll serve to ward off anything that might think us food.”
“Like what?”
>”This is Equestria. That’s not really a bright question to ask, Anonymous.”
>She has a point there, though you’d only seen pictures of the various mythical beings in one of Twilight’s books.
>Fucking manticores, really?
>”No peeking, Anonymous.” She calls from inside.
“Promise. Though technically I’ve already seen you naked.”
>You had, when you stumbled upon her bathing.
>”Yes, well, there’s that.”
>She creaks open the little wagon siding, passing you her dress.
>”Hurry up and get undressed, I’m rather cold in here.
>You set it out on a tree near your shelter, and shakily start to undo your bootlaces.
>Was this happening?
>You’d never lain with a human girl before.
>A spark of questioning enters your brain after that remark but you decide to block it out for now.
>There’ll be a time and place for that.
>You unbutton and peel off your shirt, admiring the three little azure diamonds for a fleeting moment before you hang it next to Crystal’s garments.
>Give it time, Anonymous.
>This adventure isn’t over yet, after all.
>Suddenly you hear a bestial noise from across the fire, though you see nothing.
>”Anonymous, what was that?”
“Stay here, I’m going to go check it out.”
>You look around for a stick or something to use as an improvised weapon.
>Finding a suitable branch, you wrap a little hay around the end and fashion a torch.
>You suddenly feel a little more badass.
>”Be careful Anonymous. And try not to get, eaten.”
>You roll your eyes.
>Like that’d happen.
>You’re a big ass human, what in the world is going to fuck with you?
>A bear?
>The noise intensifies as you leave the campsite, your cobbled torch casting a flickering glow in the distance.
>You still don’t see anything, but…hold on a second.
>You pause and listen a little more intently.
>…is that…
>Suddenly something large and brown catches you off guard and leaps at you, knocking you to the ground and sending your torch clattering aside, the embers quickly losing their selves to the land.
“What the fuck-“
>Is all you manage before you feel something sharp clamp down on your leg.
”FUCCCCCCCK”
>You scream as loud as you can, bending in half to try and push whatever it was off of your leg, but all you feel is wood.
>The pain is absolutely unbearable, and the tree that seems to be biting you is having none of this resistance nonsense.
>You beat at the thing with your fists; your sore arm was your dominant one and is doing little in its weak state.
“Crystalll!”
>You yell, trying to get her attention.
>Fuck Fuck Fuck.
>This isn’t how you die, is it?
>With that thought, something else clamps its maw on your neck.
>And everything goes black.

>You are Crystal.
>And you swear you heard Anonymous cry your name.
>Oh no, you hope he’s okay.
>You clamber out of the shelter, still nude.
>No time for pleasantries.
>Suddenly you feel a strange sensation.
>In this body, you decided to hide your horn at the base of your spine.
>And…it feels like something is tugging at it.
>As if someone had a rope tied to it, and was trying to pull at it with all of its might.
>What in the world?
“Anonymous! Where are you?”
>You sense something in the distance.
>Something intensely magical.
>Before you have a chance to go take a look at it, fear grips you like a sack of ice to the head.
>And then you hear it.
>Silence.
>No fire.
>No bestial growling.
>No crickets.
>No wind.
>A sudden crackling discharge of green and white energy catches your eye in the distance from the fire.
>You cast a quick little spell to give yourself a little better vision at night just in time to catch what is happening.
>An orb of white hot magic is expanding from the ground, and is obliterating the trees around it in a fast ever-growing pace.
>You hastily change back to your original form and fly as quick as you can away from the anomaly, watching from behind as the campsite and more of the forest is caught in the blast radius, the dark trees being enveloped in white, and then promptly disappearing.
>You flap in the air, a good distance away, watching in disbelief as the forest is quietly consumed by…whatever the hell that was.
>You’d never seen anything like it.
>As quickly as it started, the expansion stops, and the white dome disappears with a magical sparkle.
>You sniff the air, a sudden smell of ozone permeating the area.
>Raw magic.
”Anonymous…!?” You call out to the forest, magically augmenting your voice slightly, hoping he’d hear.
>But there is no response.
>You feel your whole body shaking as a million different thoughts scramble through your brain.
>You try and shut them all out and focus on figuring out this mystery, first.
>In silence you flap down to the forest, stopping right before the blast zone.
>There is absolutely nothing there aside from some rocks, all of the trees and greenery are just…gone.
>Wait…there is something, there in the epicenter of the blast.
>Throwing caution to the eerily silent wind, you go to investigate.
>Surrounded by the husk of two timberwolves, their bodies turned to nothing more than bits of firewood…
>Is Anonymous.