Apathy Anon (One-Shot)

>Be Anon
>In Equestria n' shit
>Ponays have been bothering you endlessly with their friendly bullshit.
>"How's it going, Anon?"
>"Wanna join our social function, Anon?"
>"What ya up to , Anon?"
>"Hey Anon, how's your cock?"
>You don't fucking care.  You never fucking cared.  What's worse is the ones that think you're obligated to give a shit about them.
>"Aw, you weren't at my birthday bash, Anon!"
>"Could you help me down at the library, Anon?"
>"Aren't you going to ask me about my day, Anon?"
>"Still wondering about that cock, Anon."
>Why is it so bad to be a little recluse?  You don't have to know everything about everyone every god dam day.  No one is always interesting, and it's not like you're going to suddenly stop being nice because you didn't converse with a person.
>So here you are, trapped on a train ride for a trip to the Crystal Empire you didn't want to go on.  You slump in your seat, hoping to at least snooze to speed things up.
>"You know, we could talk about your cock to pass the time"
>ZZZzzz...

>When the train finally arrived, you were promptly dragged via pony posse to all the tourist sites the town had to offer.  Merchant square, big library, fashion salon, olympic arena, blah blah blah.  Your group came to the castle grounds last to show off the throne room.  The tour had one of those boring guides, so you managed to slip away from the drowsy oration.  After getting a good ways away from the group, you take the time to chill out on a big red sofa in an empty atrium.  As you idly gaze about the area, you eyes fall on a passageway leading downwards.  Bored and mildly curious, you make your way towards the mouth of the ramp, noting that it arced back into the building further down.  As you descend, you can make out a slight humming noise.  Further down, the tunnel takes on a blue hue from some light source.  The exiting mouth of your corridor is upon you, and looking out, you find yourself in a large cavern.  It was an apparent nexus for the castle above, crystal hewn for supportive wall structures to keep it stable.  At the center, you found the source of the humming and light – a twirling, heart shaped piece of crystal.
>”Oh, hi!”

>You turn around, impulsively murmuring “Not my cock”, but managing to keep it low enough as to be inaudible.  You stand straight faced, albeit a tad startled – a testament to how much the equines had been pestering you.  In front of you is a pink royal, the crown tipping you off if the Alicorn race didn't.  Her violet eyes stared at you with an open innocence shared by her smile.  Wherever you were, she wasn't upset you had gotten there.
>”Went ahead of the group to see the Crystal Heart, huh?”
>You look away from her towards the object in question.  It floated above a few feet above the surface, emitting a light aurora as the crystals refracted light.
>”I suppose I could give the tour myself.  The Crystal Heart is the, well, heart and soul of the Crystal Empire.  The emotions of those present when it's used flow through the castle's walls up to the Boreal Spire, where they are amplified and spread out across Equestria quick as lightning.  Our people's happiness emboldens that of the equines from southern countries, and makes for the long standing enjoyment we have of one another's company.  The Heart is a beautiful but powerful object, and had this room made after the events of King Sombra to keep it secure.”
>The mare looks at you expectantly, possibly awaiting praise or questioning.  You opt for the latter.
”So this crystal modifies the behavior of equines across the continent based on the emotion of the user?”
>She nods happily.
>”That's the gist of it.  Sombra tried using the crystal to warp Equestria towards subservience, and took the whole city to attempt it.  With only you and I here, I imagine the crystal wouldn't do much.”
>She looks about, a smile playing on her face.
>”You know, with that said, it wouldn't hurt to give a tiny demonstration.  Besides, it's not like you get another chance at impressing the human, eh?”
>She motions you over to the crystal, her horn glowing with a white magic.  She points it at the Heart, preparing to signal the Boreal Spire.
>”Go ahead and hold the crystal lightly.  I don't expect much change, but you should at least be able to see how the process works.”
>You walk up to the crystal, letting it twist in your hands as the mare's spell reaches full power.
>”Here we go!”
>As the spell is cast, you can't help but hold a passing thought.
“I don't think you realize just how apathetic I am.”

>The white light from the casting fades.  As you blink, you can make out the Princess walking back towards the ramp tunnel.
>”So yeah, that was the Heart and everything.”
>You look about, carefully letting go of the crystal as it kept floating in place before moving towards the ramp yourself.  As the pink mare makes her way up, you speak before she can get out of view.
“Never caught your name, by the way.”
>”Eh, s'fine”
>She disappears up the tunnel, and you see no sign of her once you reach the top yourself.  You make your way through the castle, backtracking a bit to where you last saw the tour guide.  Eventually, you bump into them again as they begin to look at portraits.  The old stallion gazes idly from frame to frame before settling on one.
>”So yeah, this is King Sombra.  He uh, did some spooky wooky stuff and liked crystals a lot.  Cool guy, I guess.”
>A round of “eh”s went across the gathered crowd.  As you ventured towards the throne room, the guards on station lounged against the wall.
>”Hey tour guide dude”, one of them offered.
>”Hey.”
>They stared at each other for a moment before idly wandering their eyes about the room.  Some of the group began to wander off towards windows in the silence.
>”Oh yeah, I need you to open the door so we can see the king dude.”
>The guard roused off the wall, opting to lean on his spear instead.
>”The Prince?”
>”Yeah, that.  What's his name again?”
>”It's uh, dunno.”
>”Whatever.  So can you open the door?”
>”Yeah sure.”
>The guard makes his way towards the double doors.  Rather than using magic, he simply falls against the left door, cracking it open enough to let two abreast enter.  As those of the group close enough to remember to enter squeezed in, the tour guide made his way towards the throne.  It was a fine, crystal carved structure with some plush sitting material at the bottom.  Atop the throne was Shining Armour, who you had met before.  He lounged on his stomach, legs curled forward off the edge of his pillow.
>”Sup.”
>The statement was targeted towards the tour guide, who offered a shrug.  Taking his position next to the throne, he coughed before waving a hoof over towards the Prince.
>”Kay, so this is the armour smith guy.  Light... shield.  Something.  He's a prince... yeah.”
>Shining attempted to give a wave towards the crowd, but gave up halfway so it looked like a sign of dismissal.
>The tour guide stood for what felt like a reasonable amount of time before wordlessly walking out of the throne room, not necessarily motioning for anyone else to go.  The rest of your time in the Empire was quiet to say the most.  As you entered the train back home, the ticketmaster didn't bother holepunching your stub.  You sat in the train cart, occasional shifts in the rail making a bump in the ride as you went home.  The equines were mostly silent, with the occasional yawn to break the monotony.  As you stared out the window, a passing idea caught in your mind.
“So, does anyone want to ask me about my cock?”
>”Meh.”
>Today was a good day.