Prehistoria Adventures

dragomorph: When you clear the portal, what greets you is a place that may have, at one point, been the ideal place for the modern stone age family.
dragomorph: The disappearance of people seems to have destroyed that, however; there are plenty of rough-hewn yet functional houses and roads, but absolutely no people.
dragomorph: Lawns are overgrown.  Roads are cracked.  It's like a prehistoric post-apocalypse.
dragomorph: Except...  You notice some movement, and before you know it, (Link: http://mspaintadventures.wikia.com/wiki/Salamander)some strange little lizards are peering out at you from the houses.
dragomorph: They seem to be eying you curiously.
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "...What are those?"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Perhaps they're the natives."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Do you think they can talk? They look pretty smart."
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "I don't know, but I've yet to meet anything sentient out here."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Well, we might as well give it a try!"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Hello! Do you speak English?"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby is fashionably late.
doesnotlikesoaps: Except...not all that fashionably.
fetchie88: Ken is hanging behind the presumably more experienced adventurers, taking everything in.
Rin: Kaguya: "Aw, they're pretty cute!"
AlopexPlasma: "...Er. Vorbiti romaneste?"
dragomorph: One of the little lizard creatures, after a length, emerges from the house and sort of waddles up to the group.  And... well, he doesn't so much speak as much as "bubbles."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Well, I'm stumped. I don't suppose any of you speak bubbles?"
Rin: The "bubbles" just make Kaguya squeal with excitement as she approaches it.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "None at all, really."
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Hmm... it sounds like a complicated language."
dragomorph: With some focus, it can be translated as, "Oh ho!  At last, some creatures have emerged from the glorious portal!  We were beginning to wonder if that piece of shit even worked!"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "I take it you don't get a lot of visitors out here."
dragomorph: Another one emerges, doing the same sort of odd dancy-bubbling as the first.  "No!  Many moons have passed without so much as a merchant!  It has been so lonely!"
dragomorph: The first one corrects.  "And by many moons, we mean three weeks."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Well, as long as we're here, is there anything we can do for you little fellows?"
AlopexPlasma: (His sidequest senses are tingling.)
HurricaneChris04: The way that was said makes Ky wonder if they have short lifespans. He certainly doesn't consider three weeks a long time...
dragomorph: One of them starts bubbling at the other, who bubbles back.  Words of "Giant Beasts of Carnivoration" can be heard.  Is that even a word?
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "There seems to be something troubling them..."
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "I wouldn't blame them if they didn't want to visit." He glances around.
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "...Something attacking?"
dragomorph: Finally, one replies, "We may have something you're interested in.  See, we have found this place to be comfortable and worthy of settling down with -- except one thing."
dragomorph: "THE BEASTS OF CARNIVORATION!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "What does that even mean?"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez looks suitably dramatically shocked by this reveal.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "The beasts of carnivoration?!"
Rin: Kaguya: "What's so wrong about carnivals?"
dragomorph: "Horrible things!  They stomp in and eat us like tasty, tasty bugs!  If we only were rid of them, we could live in peace!"
fetchie88: Ken just blinks. He is pretty sure that's not a word, indeed, but that doesn't affect the impact.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Very well!"
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "...Carnivores."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "The beasts of carnivoration? They sound beastly!"
dragomorph: "Oh sure, if you wanna be hoity toity about it."
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "I, Tyrant Valvatorez, PROMISE that we shall rid you of this carnivoracious menace!"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Well, our purpose seems clear!"
dragomorph: "Hooooraaaaay!"  So.  Much.  Bubbling.
HurricaneChris04: Ky...cannot find the words to respond.
Rin: Kaguya: "Ohhhhh. I thought they were just using another word for it." She was wondering where the Ferris Wheel was. "But they seem pretty happy that we're going to get rid of these beasts for them!"
HurricaneChris04: One, he was volunteered. Two, tyrant?
AlopexPlasma: Joachim claps Val on the back.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Well said!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby is just going to stand there. And twitch.
fetchie88: Ken nods, willing to help, but he's not certain how much he can do.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Now, where might we find these carnivarious beasts?"
dragomorph: One of them seems to think.  "Hmmm.  Well, we're not too sure!  They are cunning creatures.  Cunning creatures with HUNGER.  But perhaps THEY might know."
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "Who are they?"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "They?"
dragomorph: "Oh, yes, them!  ...do we have to send them to THEM?"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Who are we talking about?"
Rin: Kaguya: "Oh can you? I'd like to meet *them*."
dragomorph: "Well, they have to be good for SOMETHING."  THe first one turns to them.  "You'll know 'em when you see 'em.  Just go down the road, turn right, and look for the overgrown path."
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Very well! Let us venture forth, and return triumphant!"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Well, what are we waiting for?"
AlopexPlasma: He's already venturing off.
doesnotlikesoaps: He could do without the large hamminess. "Well, 'they' won't find themselves," he remarks, and starts walking down the road.
fetchie88: Ken follows, with a little bow to the lizards as he passes them. "We'll do our best", he promises.
dragomorph: As you head down the road, you might notice the lizards have settled into the ruins fairly comfortable.  A few seem to be jumping on something that looks like a really rough canopy car.
dragomorph: A few more are working on adding some large tube to what appears to be a mailbox.
dragomorph: There's a small crowd wearing very crumpled hatwear and looking sheepish about it.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "....Is that an automobile?"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "...I'm not sure."
fetchie88: Ken: "Not...quite...?"
dragomorph: "What is an automobile?  This is a transportable bouncing apparatus!"
dragomorph: "...wheeeeee!"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "What a strange and diverse culture."
HurricaneChris04: Ky is...just unable to comment.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby can sympathize.
AlopexPlasma: ...Come to think of it, they don't know how long it'll be until they reach Them. The kid and the girl might get tired before long. Hm.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Say, can we borrow your... bouncy thing?"
dragomorph: "You want to bounce on it too?  Be our guests!"
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "Huh?"
dragomorph: They jump off and to the side, executing stylish and agile flips through the air.  Except for that one, who falls on its ass.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Good thinking, Joachim."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim ducks into what looks like the driver's seat. Okay maybe he's got more selfish motivations. This looks pretty cool.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Hop in, everybody!"
fetchie88: Ken isn't sure what this has to do with....oh.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez hops in!
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "...Or hop on, if you like!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby stares at them for a moment, then gives up and gets in. It'd be more convenient after all, right?
fetchie88: Ken: "Is this really going to be faster?"
fetchie88: But he's climbing in regardless.
Rin: Kaguya joins the rest of the party inside somehow.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "...a touch primitive. It appears to be powered using our feet."
dragomorph: The car has no mechanical engine, but there seemsm to be a space under the seats where you can, uh...
dragomorph: ...charge it with your feet.
HurricaneChris04: Aand Ky, against his better judgment, climbs in.
AlopexPlasma: ....Well, this does look pretty easy to handle! And to think he'd been worried about understanding this newfangled technology.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim starts jogging with the thing.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez helps.
dragomorph: It goes a lot faster than you'd expect!  Salamanders go flying.
doesnotlikesoaps: He isn't even helping and yet it's going faster than he thought it would. Maybe it won't be so bad, right?
doesnotlikesoaps: Yeah, right.
doesnotlikesoaps: But Barnaby is going to reluctantly do his part and start jogging.
fetchie88: Ken will try to help, too, though he probably won't be able to keep pace that well.
dragomorph: Salmanders watch you guys as you go, wondering what those strange big creatures are doing with the bouncing apparatus.
dragomorph: Humans are fuckin' weird, man.
dragomorph: Eventually the spot to turn right shows up!  Hope you guys are paying attention!
AlopexPlasma: Welp, the driver sure isn't. Someone better yell.
Rin: Nope, Kaguya's just too busy having the time of her life.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "Turn right!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Leave it to him to be the killjoy.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez banks into theturn!
dragomorph: SCREEEEEEECH
AlopexPlasma: This sure is a right turn.
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "You could have at least slowed down first!"
dragomorph: You're lucky you didn't tilt the thing over, man.
Rin: Kaguya: "Can we do that again?"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "Never again."
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Regardless, we seem to have arrived."
fetchie88: Ken cranes his neck to see if he can spy the overgrown path they're looking for.
dragomorph: Sure enough, there's a somewhat obscured and overgrown path to what seems to have been a park at one point.  There's a salamander with a hoe next to the entrance watching with confusion.
dragomorph: ASsuming you guys have the sense to STOP there.  Hope the soles of your shoes are heatproof.
ZebulonCrispi: Screeeeech.
doesnotlikesoaps: Oh, great, his boots need to be repaired now.
dragomorph: At least you're there.  Talk about weird forms of transport.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "So that's what driving's like! Not bad at all!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "No, it usually involves a steering wheel, an engine and minimal use of feet."
doesnotlikesoaps: He sounds bitter.
dragomorph: The farmer salamander shrugs and begins working hard on a small patch of crops.  Angrily, for some reason.
HurricaneChris04: Ky, on the other hand, is more than happy to stick to walking or cycling.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Could he be one of the 'them' that the salamanders mentioned?"
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "We're here, so we may as well ask."
fetchie88: Since they've arrived at their destination, Ken will attempt to climb out of the car.
fetchie88: This might involve climbing over someone. Sorry.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Well, they said we'd know Them when we saw Them...."
dragomorph: It looks like it's farming mushrooms, upon closer inspection.
doesnotlikesoaps: He gets out of the car himself, though not without some effort, and shakes the dust off his boots before critically glancing it over and then turning his attention to the salamander farming mushrooms.
dragomorph: "grumble grumble"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim climbs out as well. "Are we just going to watch him farm mushrooms all day?"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "Excuse me, sir?" Winning smile, go!
dragomorph: The salmander looks at him.  "What?  Can't you see I'm busy farming the fuckin' mushrooms?  Always the fuckin' mushrooms.  Even when we all showed up here, I'm stuck with the goddamn fuckin' mushrooms!"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "You... don't like mushrooms?"
doesnotlikesoaps: He blinks for a moment, honestly taken aback by this, before putting on the same smile from before.
Rin: Kaguya: "Oh, I've never heard of those kind of mushrooms before."
dragomorph:  "I fuckin' hate the little things!  About as bad as all the fuckin mushrooms back home!  And yet here I keep farmin' them 'cause if you don't they just take over!
dragomorph: Fuckin' things."  Man, someone needs to diversify this guy's vocabulary.
doesnotlikesoaps: Must...persevere... "Well, I'm sure you've heard of 'them', right?" he asks, placing particular emphasis on 'them'.
dragomorph: "Them?  Oh, you must be talking about THOSE numbnuts.  Down the path."  He jerks his, uh, head down that way.  "Make sure you do what they want or else they get all pissy about it."
doesnotlikesoaps: "Thank you."
doesnotlikesoaps: Making his way down that path now.
ZebulonCrispi: Onwards!
AlopexPlasma: Follow the leader!
fetchie88: Ken glances back at the farming salamander, but will follow Barnaby.
Rin: While Kaguya does want to converse more on the effectiveness of 'fuckin' mushrooms', she chooses to not get left behind.
dragomorph: Down the path, after some dealing with the overgrowth, you finally see... a lot of salamanders.  In bedsheets.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "That must be the Them!"
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "They're certainly different from the ones we've previously seen."
Rin: Kaguya: "They're not that different, are they?"
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "They're wearing...are those bedsheets?"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "It seems like it."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "They're wearing little robes! That's different in my book!"
dragomorph: One of them approaches them.  "HALT!  Who enters the Enclave of the Great Order of Secret Wizards?"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Secret Wizards?!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Time for that winning smile! "Ah, sorry if we've interrupted anything."
doesnotlikesoaps: "We were just told to come here. Apparently you could help us with a problem?"
dragomorph: "Hmm.  So they have come to us for advice!  We may be able to help... but you must do something for us first!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "Like what?"
fetchie88: Ken: "Something for you?"
dragomorph: "It is a most vital and important task!  And that..."
dragomorph: "is..."
dragomorph: They all shout at once.  "BEHOLD OUR ROBES!"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez beholds.
HurricaneChris04: Ky just. Stares. In bewilderment.
Rin: Kaguya: "Whaaaa?" It may not be possible, but she's more baffled than she's ever been.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby just facepalms.
fetchie88: Ken's expression probably mirrors Ky's.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim beholds with extravagance, going down to one knee and gasping.
AlopexPlasma: "I BEHOLD!"
dragomorph: The "secret wizards" all nod approvingly.  "Excellent, excellent!  And the rest of you too!"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "I have beheld your robes, Secret Wizards."
doesnotlikesoaps: ...ugh, fine. He acknowledges their robes with a nod and says, "I behold."
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "They...certainly are a sight to behold."
doesnotlikesoaps: His tone is not very beholding.
Rin: Kaguya is just going to reach towards one to grab a hold of their robe.
HurricaneChris04: That prompts Ky to reach out for Kaguya's wrist. "They said 'behold,' not 'hold!'"
fetchie88: Ken nods, getting his act together. "I'm...beholding them too," he offers.
dragomorph: "THEY HAVE BEHELD THE ROBES!  HUZZAH!"  They all bubble happily for a bit, before one of them finally calms down.  "Very well!  We are pleased with your beholding!  Ask us what you will!"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Great wizards, we seek the Beasts of Carnivoration."
Rin: Kaguya: "And any nearby carnivals!"
dragomorph: "Oooooh."  They all bubble together.  "We see all!  We KNOW all!  ...the nearest carnival is in a few weeks in a strange, faroff land called Sirocco."
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "And the beasts?"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby makes a note to avoid said carnival if it ever arrives.
fetchie88: Ken'd opened his mouth to ask that same question, so he shuts it and nods somewhat impatiently.
dragomorph: "The beasts!  Terrible, bloodthirsty creatures!  They consume our brothers!  But we have seen them!  They come from a cave, to the North!  Beware!
dragomorph: They will rend you limb from limb if you are not careful, and then you shall behold robes no more!"
dragomorph: They all wail in horror, as if this is the worst thing ever.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "So.... what exactly are the beasts?"
doesnotlikesoaps: ...he's starting to consider that. "We'll be careful," he says. "And how do we know if we see them?"
dragomorph: "The beasts!  The hooooooorrible beasts!"  More wailing.  "You will know!  YOU WILL KNOOOOOOW!"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "It would seem that our adversaries are most dreadful."
fetchie88: Ken has a feeling this isn't going to work, but he presses for more information anyway. "That's not enough. How will we know?"
dragomorph: They seem too distressed to answer.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Enough! Let us take our leave of this enclave and deal with the horrible beasts waiting tot he north."
Rin: Kaguya: "Right! I'm ready to kick some ass for these cute guys!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "I suppose I'll have to help, then."
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "Then what are we waiting for? Let's get going."
dragomorph: Leaving behind the, uh, secret wizards, you work your way through some fairly dense jungle.  Eventually, you see a large cave ahead of you.
ZebulonCrispi: Into the cave!
AlopexPlasma: Onwards!
doesnotlikesoaps: Against his better judgement, Barnaby follows in.
dragomorph: It's dark.  Did anybody pack a light?
fetchie88: Ken glances around the cave for any signs of what might lurk within, but falls in line behind the others.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez can see in the dark.
ZebulonCrispi: But no.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim can....
AlopexPlasma: turn into a glittery little bat.
AlopexPlasma: Which he does.
Rin: Leaving Kaguya to shriek at the sudden transformation..
doesnotlikesoaps: He could activate his power right now, but he's saving it for later, just in case.
dragomorph: The sound of her shriek reverberates through the cave.
dragomorph: And then
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Whoops, sorry! Should have warned you!"
dragomorph: the ground
dragomorph: begins to shake.
doesnotlikesoaps: Ground-shaking usually means bad things, right?
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby starts glowing blue.
dragomorph: The shaking grows more and more pointed.  And then, in front of them, you see!
dragomorph: ...a small lizard.  Well that's...
dragomorph: Wait, no, never mind.  It just got flattened by (Link: http://finalfantasy.wikia.com/wiki/Tyrannosaur_%28Final_Fantasy_VI%29)this thing.
dragomorph: Which is freaking huge.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Carnivoracious, indeed!"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Bah! We can take him!"
doesnotlikesoaps: He really should've seen this coming.
dragomorph: (( BGM Change:  (Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zU2agExFiE)FF6 -- The Decisive Battle ))
dragomorph: It roars.  Seems like it's hungry -- and you all look like delicious morsals.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez draws his sword.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim flutters for altitude.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby settles into a fighting stance. Come get some.
dragomorph: ((Order:  Valvatorez, Barnaby, Ky, Kaguya, Ken, Joachim. ))
dragomorph: ((Valvatorez!))
HurricaneChris04: Thunderseal is in Ky's hand in the blink of an eye, and he enters his own fighting stance.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez leaps like an anime character, charging blade-first directly at the Carnivoration Beast's horrible maw! +
dragomorph: The beast shifts its head away from the blade, attempting to snap at the juicy morsal wielding it.  The blade nicks it, but its scales are tough and it doesn't seem too phased.
dragomorph: ((Valvatorez react ))
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez...gets eaten?
ZebulonCrispi: Yes, he is swallowed whole, but from within the dinosaur's mouth he strikes once more! Maybe it's more vulnerable here.+
dragomorph: The dinosaur winces, and spits out the ouchie thing.  It's PISSED now.
dragomorph: ((Barnaby))
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez lands, much stickier than he was a moment prior.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby charges, straight for the legs, then once he's close enough, brings up his leg for a kick. Keep in mind that he has his Hundred Power activated right now.
doesnotlikesoaps: +
dragomorph: The creature attempts to maneuver away, but still gets smacked; the force of the blow causes it to stagger a bit.  It's possibly you've broken the bone a little.
dragomorph: It snaps down at Barnaby, attempting to get the little bastard.
dragomorph: ((Barnaby react))
doesnotlikesoaps: Ha, screw you, he's much faster than you now! He darts out of the way.
doesnotlikesoaps: Then he goes for the other leg. +
dragomorph: With the leg smacked as it is, it can't quite keep its weight up, and the force of the second blow staggers it to its knees.
dragomorph: ((Ky! ))
HurricaneChris04: Stun Edge Charge time. Ky levels Thunderseal at the Tyrannosaur's head. A huge arrowhead of plasma erupts from the blade and flies at it.+
dragomorph: Its dodging is reduced, and the plasma hits its head.  It doesn't kill it, but it looks like it hurt, and it looks pretty mad.
dragomorph: These things are a much bigger threat than the little ones.  It decides to bring out something a little nastier.  For a moment, it glows... and then the cave shakes.
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "What's it doing?"
dragomorph: Small, glowing hunks of rock begin to manifest around it.  And then... they begin raining down on its foes.
dragomorph: ((All react))
HurricaneChris04: Ky ducks, jumps, and spins out of the way of any rocks that come flying at him.
doesnotlikesoaps: Thank god for Hundred Power. He darts in and out, glowing blue as he narrowly misses being turned into Bunny mush.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim is fortunately a much smaller and faster target like this. He zips out of the way of any that are actually in danger of hitting him.
Rin: Kaguya wastes little time in revealing her own sword and activates the power within. Several moon shaped blades whirl up around her and knock any rocks that may rain down upon her stationary form.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Those are some pretty neat tricks!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "This is no time to be impressed!"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Nonsense! There's always time to be impressed!!"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez scatters into a host of bats, dodging between the meteors with greater agility than his humanoid form.
dragomorph: Yeah, this dinosaur is not a happy camper.
dragomorph: ((Kaguya!))
Rin: "Leave it to me♪" Leaping up towards the head of this "Carnival Beast", she'll activate those moon scythes again to lead the assault, followed by an impressive swing from the giant sword. +
dragomorph: It roars in pain, but it sure seems to be able to take a lot of abuse.  You get the sense it's a pretty tough bastard through that hide, which might explain why it takes a licking and keeps on ticking.
dragomorph: It bites towards her, a ferocious, angry chomp.
dragomorph: ((Kaguya react))
Rin: She just might be quick enough to attempt to deflect with the sword - it is pretty darn big. +
dragomorph: It chomps on the blade and rears back, roaring at the cuts to its mouth.  We hope that sword's pretty durable, though, because those jaws are wicked strong.
dragomorph: ((Ken))
fetchie88: Ken has been trying to keep out of everyone's way (or at least not need to be rescued again), but he can't sit by and do nothing.
fetchie88: He glances around for anything that could possibly serve as a weapon, no matter how small.
dragomorph: There's some rocks scattered about, including some sharper ones that got knocked loose from the ceiling during the meteor attack.
fetchie88: Grabbing up a sharp rock and hoping the beast doesn't notice him (since everyone else is so obviously more lethal), Ken tries to slip to the side and stab the beast in the leg. Even if he can only provide a distraction, that might be enough. +
dragomorph: It's not a lot of damage -- it's a pretty tough beast, after all -- but it hurts a little.  It rears its head around, aiming to snap at the latest problem.  It seems to be slowing a bit from the onslaught, but it still packs a bite.
dragomorph: ((Ken react))
doesnotlikesoaps: #
dragomorph: ((Barnaby assist))
doesnotlikesoaps: Hell, no, kiddo. This is going to make for the second time that he's princess-carried you out of the way of danger.
fetchie88: Ken: "Somebody, while it's watching...!"
HurricaneChris04: @
dragomorph: ((Ky support!))
HurricaneChris04: And as soon as Ken says that, Ky sprints at the monster, gathering magic before finally charging at it, surrounded by a field of electricity. "RIDE THE LIGHTNING!"+
dragomorph: The beast roars in pain as the electricity surges through its system, successfully distracting it from its prey.  It still has some fight in it -- but not much.
dragomorph: ((Joachim))
AlopexPlasma: Joachim swoops down. Despite his appearance, he's not one jot weaker in this form, and all that power is concentrated into one bone-breaking bat-sized headbutt.
dragomorph: Yeah, it totally didn't see you there.  Compound all the damage it's been taking to the head this fight and, well, one bat-tering ram is enough to crack its skull.  It staggers a bit longer, looks ready to fight more...
dragomorph: ...and then falls to the ground, and is still.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez reforms from the cloud of bats.
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "...Is it dead?"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "I hope so."
dragomorph: Oh yeah, it dead.
Rin: "Does it have any neat stuff on it?" Kaguya gets right to business.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim hovers above the critter, resuming his flashlight duties.
AlopexPlasma: "You think it's carrying a wallet or something?"
dragomorph: It has a FABULOUS SPEAR in it!  ...that can only be equipped by imps.
doesnotlikesoaps: Meanwhile Barnaby is just placing Ken down. Thank god, he wasn't sure if he could keep up the fight beyond five minutes.
doesnotlikesoaps: And then he sees the spear.
doesnotlikesoaps: "...why would a dinosaur be carrying a spear?"
fetchie88: Ken nods his thanks for the second close save.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "It's probably best not to think about it."

HurricaneChris04: Ky: "As long as we have proof that we slew this creature..."
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Yes, let us return to the village. Our promise is fulfilled."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "...Well, how 'bout one of you cut off the head."
AlopexPlasma: "That should do it!"
Rin: Kaguya: "Um... but how are we going to carry a head that size back with us?"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "This spear should suffice."
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "If not, perhaps a tooth."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "In the car, of course! We can push it."
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "How is it going to fit?"
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "We have to get back through the jungle, first.
fetchie88: Ken: "Um, I think the spear should be enough...."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Good point! I'll just carry it, then."
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "Let's just take the spear and go."
dragomorph: Spear taken!  Just... don't question it.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby is already making his way out of the cave.
doesnotlikesoaps: Also, at this point he's stopped glowing blue.
dragomorph: When you head back to the stone age town, a large group of the salamanders have gathered waiting for your return near the entrance to the obscured pathway, including one or two "wizards.'
dragomorph: When they see you, they all begin flailing and glubbing happily.  In true RPG fashion, they've apparently heard about your feat before you actually reported it.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby just puts on the usual smile.
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "Rejoice, humble villagers, for your oppression is at an end!"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim is no longer a bat. "The beast is slain!"
dragomorph: "Look!  There it is!  The Skewer of Neutrality!  They really have done it!"  Glub glub glub!
dragomorph: "We must take them to see the Grand Glubber!  He will surely reward them!"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "So long as you can live in freedom, no reward is--" Somebody stop him.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "Yes, thank you."
dragomorph: The group lead them along towards what they say is the "Grand Palace of Pathways"  This, uh, turns out to be basically a prehistoric bowling alley.
ZebulonCrispi: Val sees nothing odd about this.
dragomorph: Inside, there seems to have been all manner of strange prehistoric equivalents of furniture set up to look... vaguely royal?  A salamander with a fantastically LESS crumpled hat and a sceptor sits on some appropriate benches.
dragomorph: "Lo!  I have heard word that you have triumphed over our terrifying foe!  You must be commended for your efforts!" exclaims the obvious leader.
dragomorph: "And so... you are commended!  Commend, commend, commend -- ow!"  One of his loyal subjects elbows him.  "Oh, right, reward.  Very well."
dragomorph: "PRODUCE... THE SPHERE OF COLLISION!"
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "The Sphere of Collision?!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "The Sphere of Collision? What does that even mean?"
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "I have a hunch..."
fetchie88: Ken steps back automatically. He has a bad feeling about this.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "I think it's a sphere."
Rin: Kaguya: "But we already *looted* a spear."
dragomorph: AND LO, THE SPHERE OF COLLISION IS PRODUC -- it's a freaking bowling ball.
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "I knew it."
ZebulonCrispi: Valvatorez: "How magnificent!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "...it's a bowling ball."
dragomorph: "UNLOCK... THE SECRET CHAMBER!"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "What are the holes for...?"
dragomorph: AND THE SECRET CHAMBER IS UNLOCKED!  ...by bowling the ball down one of the aisles.  Strike!
Rin: Kaguya cheers on instinct.
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "That."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim "How did he do that without fingers?"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "I'm not quite sure, and honestly, I'd rather not find out."
dragomorph: The pin setter lowers, but instead of a full set, there's a single, ornate stone pin, which two of the salamanders grab and lug over.  One of them unscrew the top...
dragomorph: And there's Anemoi!
doesnotlikesoaps: Finally, the whole reason why he went on this mission in the first place.
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Where's your sense of adventure, man!"
dragomorph: "Behold!  Such glorious glowstones such have never been seen --"  "Oh come on, we come across this crap all the time."  "Shh!"
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "I've had enough adventure for today, thank you."
dragomorph: The Grand Glubber nods his head, and a few of the gems are passed to everybody; about 3% for everybody.
dragomorph: "A  request... the Skewer of Neutrality is a grand artifact for us, a symbol of the day our land was freed from carnivoracious tyranny!  May we keep it?"
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "Say no more! It's all yours!"
HurricaneChris04: Ky bows. "Thank you very much. We appreciate your generosity."
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "Take it, I don't see much use for it."
dragomorph: A couple salamanders happily take the spear.  "You are welcome anytime in our glubly little village, heroes!"
Rin: Kaguya bows in gratitude as well. Enjoy. "Thank you for your kindness! I'll come by and visit every chance I get!"
fetchie88: Ken looks down at his anemoi and mutters "heroes...?" to himself. Everyone else is so much more impressive...
doesnotlikesoaps: Heroes...that's a nice sound. He glances over at Ken.
doesnotlikesoaps: "You helped too."
fetchie88: Ken nods, swallowing. "I suppose." And he'll try a smile, for Barnaby's sake.
dragomorph: And lo, much celebrating was done!  They offer to hose a feast in your stead, but considering what they eat, you may wanna pass...
HurricaneChris04: Ky: "That's...that's quite all right. You've done enough for us already, and we should be getting back soon."
doesnotlikesoaps: Barnaby: "Ah, no, thank you, I'm watching what I eat."
doesnotlikesoaps: ...what, you thought he got this figure by collecting bottle caps?
fetchie88: Ken: "...thank you for your offer. But I'm afraid I'm not hungry."
AlopexPlasma: Joachim: "It actually looks pretty good... Another time, perhaps!"
dragomorph: MISSION COMPLETE