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- >Your last few months have been some of the toughest of your life
- >Getting displaced into a forigen world populated by small, technicolor equines is one thing
- >To find out that there's more dudes than chicks is another
- >You've made some pretty awesome bros, that's for sure
- >Rainbow Blitz, Bubble Berry, the list goes on. . .
- >But, you've desired female companionship for a while now
- >Be careful what you wish for, you mused
- >In one of your trips of Canterlot for some more esoteric material for Dusk Shine's library, you ran into Princess Highblood
- >Cute as a button, but rotten to the core
- >You really didn't want anything to do with her, but man, did she want you
- >And whatever Highblood wants, Highblood gets.
- >Royal connections, a desperate bid to further the Platinum Line, and you imagine a whole metric fuckton of whining, you found yourself betrothed to the little spoiled mare
- >You stood now on a balcony of a obnoxiously lavish manor, looking down toward Ponyville
- >You missed your simple life there, working on some of the construction and renovation work
- >It was on again, off again
- >You were a good worker, but you kind of intimidated the mares on the team
- >Easy come easy go, you supposed
- >Your eyes fell upon one iconic building
- >Sugarcube Corner
- >You wondered how Bubble Berry was doi-
- >Wait, Bubble Berry
- >That's just your ticket out of here!
- >A wicked grin spreads across your face as you retire to your quarters for the night
- >The next morning was an early one
- >You spent it buttering up the the royalty with her favorite breakfast, sweet talk, that sort of thing
- >You poured on the attention and praise, and she soaked it up like a sponge
- >You suggested that the two of you throw the biggest party this towns ever seen in celebration of your engagement
- >She loved the idea, and gave you the means to hire the best help
- >You told her you'd be out and about for a while, and promised to be back by sundown.
- >She was beside herself with excitement, and went to her own way
- >Probably to gossip and tell people out the future party
- >Whatever.
- >Most of the evening was spent reserving the most top shelf location in Canterlot, get the most excellent party favors, all that sort of thing.
- >All the was left was to hire the baking and the entertainment
- >You took a ride down to Ponyville via train, and exited to a the familiar hamlet, and saw familiar faces
- >Mandolin, Big Marcelline, Applejack, Butterscotch. . .
- >They were all happy to see you, but you didn't have much time to talk
- >You headed Sugarcube Corner, heading inside
- >It wasn't busy, but there was a familiar stallion there manning the register
- >'Just a minute! Mr. Cake dropped his contact lens, and I gotta find it!'
- 'Ah. . .this can't wait, though. I've only got till sundown!'
- >He banged his head on the cabinet, muttering a quick horsefeathers and standing upright when he heard your voice.
- >His pupils turned into pinpricks as the biggest smile spread across his face, and he started to shake
- >You sighed, bracing yourself for what was to come
- >You were ambushed by a speeding pink bullet as you felt his legs wrap around you and him nuzzle your neck
- >'OhmySolarisAnonitsbeensolongandImissedyouwe'veallmissedyouandIgottothrow a huge party now and-'
- >You stopped him by putting a finger on his snout
- 'I came for a party, but, not a homecoming one. At least, not just yet. . .'
- >He made a scrunchy face. 'Is it for the meanie-pants Highblood?'
- 'In a sense. You see. . .I've lead her to believe that I'm out and about getting stuff for an engagement party. And I am. . .so I figure, why not get the best catering and entertainment in Equestria?'
- >'But she's such a sourpuss! Even if I was there, I couldn't make her cheer up.'
- 'Ah, but here's the trick. The way I figure it is, if you show them a good ol' Ponyville party. . .the biggest, most awesome, superfantastic party ever, she'll think I'm not cut out for bein' a king, and I'm home free! Plus, catering a Canterlot event will rake in a big pile of bits. Win-win!'
- >He got that excitable look again and squeezed you harder. 'Oh, Anon! All that time in the Library with Dusk Shine did do something good for your noggin!'
- >He let you go, and was cartwheeling and bouncing all over the place
- >You thought he was gunna break into song, but he didn't.
- >You sighed happily, letting him tire out a bit before you continued talking
- 'Well. . .I should be going now', you said after a whole three straight minutes of bouncing.
- >He seemed to stop midair, letting out a gasp similar to the one he gave you when he first met Dusk Shine.
- >'But anon! You just got back! You can't leave again so soon. . .'
- 'Breaks my heart, bro, but thems the breaks. Highhorse is gunna get suspicious if I stay out too long.'
- >He giggle snorted at the nickname and trotted over to you, looking happy, but you could see his misty eyes
- >'I'm glad you came back. . .even if only for a while. I missed you so much.'
- >You sighed, nodding.
- 'Yeah. . .I am too. But I'll be back for good soon enough. The party is going to be in a month. Think you can last that long?'
- >'Yeah. . .yeah, I can.'
- >He seemed heartbroken, and it was tearing you apart
- 'Bubble Berry. . .you know you are my bro, and so is Rainbow Blitz. But. . .I'm not into stallions. Always know, though, that I do love you, just not in that way.'
- >He was silent for a while, simply nodding
- 'Come on. Let's see a smile. You've got a lot of planning do, and a lot of tricks to cook up for Snothorn, huh?'
- >He got back his characteristic enthusiasm and nodded vigorously, pulling you into a hug again
- >You said your goodbyes and left the bakery, but not before hearing the quiet sound of glass breaking, and perhaps the loudest swear you've ever heard in a while
- >You were laughing the whole train ride back about that.
- >You returned to the Platinum Manor but minutes before Artemis rose the moon
- >Highblood was nothing if not a stickler for punctuality
- >The servants said she was waiting in her bedroom for you
- >Panic.jpg
- >You reluctantly headed up there, and opened the door cautiously
- >She was leaning forward in a somewhat 'seductive' pose, her face contorted and scrunched, but not in a cute way.
- >She lacked her usual dress and Platinum line necklace she loved so much, and they were strewn about on the floor
- >'M-mm. .. we-welcome home, d-d-ear. . ' She said, sounding strained and trying ever so hard to sound sultry.
- 'And. . .how long have you been like that?'
- >She let out an annoyed sigh and flopped down on the bed. 'Ever since I got home in the evening. . .you do now how RUDE it is to keep a princess waiting, don't you!?'
- >You sighed.
- 'Of course. A Thousand apologies your majesty. Forgive this poor and simple creature for his tardiness.'
- >You said it in the most convincing way possible, despite screaming internally in anger.
- >She seemed pleased at this and sat on her haunches, looking at you with a smirk.
- >'As it should be. I'll have to get you a tutor when we are wed. . .speaking of, how did your scampering about the city go?'
- >You walked over to the bed, sitting next to her as she wormed her way under your warm
- >Her embrace wasn't a welcome one, but not entirely bad
- >You'd prefer Ponyville mares. In both your arms.
- 'Reserved the ENTIRE Guilded Rose for us, got the finest silk and diamond encrusted widgits for party favors, and got THE best entertainment and catering in Equestria.'
- >'Ooooh, you spoil me! Who's going to be feeding and entertaining us.'
- 'Now, a good magician doesn't keep his secrets. I've had a tiring day, so I need to get some sleep.'
- >You stood, but before you felt a hoof on your shoulder
- >'Anon. . .can I ask you something?'
- 'Yes, lovey mare over there?'
- >'There. .. there will be lots of money at the party, right?'
- 'Enough bits you can swim in, love.'
- >She squee'd with happiness and dismissed you.
- >You breathed a sigh of relief. You were worried she would have said something to make you feel bad about breaking this engagement!
- >You laughed to yourself, and went to sleep
- >Your dreams were filled with lots of pink and pastry.
- >The next weeks were a whole bunch of planning and preparing
- >Highblood, in her unlimited snootiness, demanded the party favors be more extravagant, and the party venue get more and more ridiculous layouts
- >Royalty usually wouldn't get away with this, but what Highblood wants, Highblood gets. . .
- >she'd been dolling you up in all sorts of ridiculous outfits as well, but eventually you convinced her with a large amount of buttering up and belly rubs that a white tux would be fine
- >Didn't prevent her from garnishing it with ALL THE GEMS
- >While Highblood organized her end, you were corresponding with Bubble Berry by means of letters
- >Barbera, bless her dragon-y soul, had found away to send letters to you via dragonfire
- >The catering would be top shelf, and you told them to serve smaller portions on bigger plates and garnish the crap out of them
- >Sell more, use less, and it looks fancy. They'll hardly be able to tell the difference.
- >The pieces were in place, the the party was today.
- >You stood on the balcony again, looking down at Ponyville.
- 'Make it a night to remember, Bubble Bro.'
- >You smiled, and headed out to the shindig
- Music: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15JCb6P60Vw
- >The party was. .. anything but, to say the least.
- >So many snooty ponies in one place.
- >So many ponies Highblood showed you off too.
- >You think she was more so showing off the Solaris-damned suit, than anything else.
- >Your ruse with the food had worked, and you only heard a few complaints about the quality of the food
- >Highblood never let them the end of it for their quips
- >The party venue was guilded, encrusted with gems, had rivers and fountains of liquid silver. . .
- >You could fee the collective poverty of your old world weeping at the egregious waste of money that was going on here
- >You grinned and bared it, for as the sun set down, the party gathered around the stage of the venue for the entertainment
- >The lights dimmed, and the light crews did their thing as you took the stage
- 'Fillies and Gentlecolts! Thank you all for coming out here tonight! We have a very special guest here tonight. . .'
- >Cue drum roll, and the curtians opening to reveal. . .Bubble Berry.
- >He was in his music suit, the one he used to chase off the Parasprites, but it had been kicked up to 11, and a position for a copoilet
- >'CANTERLOOOOOOOOT! ARE YOU READY TO ROOOOOOOOOOOOOCK!'
- >You tore off your tux, some how, revealing your casual 'rags'
- 'LEEEEEETS DO THIS!'
- >You hoped in next to him and smiled, looking out in the crowd
- >Before you started, you could see Highblood turning neon white and screaming externally
- >The next seven minutes were awesome. That's the only way you can describe it.
- >After the song finished, fireworks went off on the stage, a sonic rainboom went off directly overhead, and the instruments spewed out candy and confetti to the stunned crowd
- >You and Bubble Berry were exhausted and panting from the music, and you shot him a coy grin
- >Your bride-to-be was on the stage in an instant, and was livid
- >'YOOOOOOOU! What is the MEANING of THIS! What was that SONIC ABOMINATION! WHAT KIND OF PONY CONSIDERS THAT ENTERTAINMENT!?'
- 'I do, babe. Best music ever. People who played this in my world were considered gods! Maybe even something higher!'
- >'AEGH! I thought I could CHANGE you into something passible for a husband! But you are still that crude, inconsiderate, lowbrow, apething I met in the street all that time ago!'
- >She spat her words with venom, but you waved them off.
- 'Yeah yeah, weddings off I'm guessing?'
- >She seemed to explode at that. 'YOU BETTER BELIEVE ITS OFF, MONKEY!'
- >She stormed off stage. You could feel a twinge of regret, but considering her, she'll probably buy a husband or something eventually.
- 'Well, folks. Sorry to waste your time tonight. It was all an elaborate ruse, I'm afraid. Never really liked her, to be honest!'
- >The crowd seemed to snap back into reality after that
- 'Well, you can pick up your diamond plated party favors on the way out. . .'
- >'Are you kidding! I simply must know the name of the bakery who prepared tonights dinner! It was astounding!' Offered a mare.
- >'The music was not quite to my taste, but I am curious to see how such a device works!' Offered another.
- >'I say, that style of yours is rather unique. . .bold, even! Who made you those clothes, human?'
- >You looked back at Bubble Berry, reigning in his excitement if only just
- 'Well. . .in no particular order. . .'
- ~~~
- >You were back in Ponyville, living with Dusk Shine in his library
- >Life was simple
- >Grass grew, pegasus flew, Solaris raised the sun, and you build things for ponies
- >Bubble Berry had his . . .incidents of flirting, but he had since reigned it in
- >You were back where you started, but. . .
- >That also meant no female companionship, still
- >Hearts 'n' Hooves day rolled around, and you spent it in the bottom of a cider glass in your favorite watering hole, The Sour Apple
- >Barkeep didn't ask any questions, so long as you had the money
- >You heard the doors swing open, and in strolled a mare
- >You seemed to perk up as she sat next to you, ordering a hard cider.
- 'Popular drink today, huh?'
- >'Yeah. . .you that human on the construction team?'
- 'Yup. Good pay. Out of doors. Really good work out. '
- >'Mmmh. . .' She said, trailing off as her drink arrived.
- >there was an awkward silence as you could feel the spaghetti spilling, but you decided to man up.
- 'What's pretty mare doing here all alone on a Hearts 'n' Hooves day, anywho?'
- >She blushed a bit. 'I'm not that pretty. . .and, I don't mind being alone.'
- 'Well. We're both here. Why not make it a date.'
- >She smiled a bit. 'Sure. Beats getting sloshed alone.'
- 'Yeah. What's your name?'
- >'Toffee.'
- 'Anon. Nice to meet you.'
- >She took a drink of her cider, sighing happily. 'So. . .you were engaged to Highblood?'
- 'Yeah. Took some cleverness to do so, but I managed.'
- >'Guessing that Sonic Rainboom a few months back had something to do with it, huh.'
- 'Yup.'
- >'Sounds like quite a story.'
- 'You don't know the half of it. . .it was, a night to remember.'
- >As you told your story, you could see her becoming more enthralled and interested, and it wasn't just the liquor doing that
- >You told her some silly stories about your time in Ponyville, as did she
- >You laughed, you smiled, and you enjoyed each others company
- >Before you knew it, Artemis had risen the moon, and you had to go your separate ways
- >'Anon. .. your really neat. I think I might just be falling for you.'
- 'If I can seduce royalty, no mare is immune to my charm.'
- >She gigged, nudging you a bit. 'Well. . .maybe we could get to know each other better. Want to come over to my house and make some sweets together? or, whatever you want to do.'
- 'I'd like that a whole lot, Toffee. I really would.'
- >'It's a date, then, officially.'
- >She waved and trotted off as you stood there with the biggest grin on your face.
- >Life here wasn't so bad, after all. . .
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