Anon in Equestria - Chapter 1

Zuul’s Anon in Equestria
Chapter 1

>You throw your bag of groceries into the back of your car and slam the trunk shut.
>Check the time.
>It’s 6:35 pm.
>You’re really tired for some reason.
>You get behind the wheel, start the car, pull out of the parking lot and start the familiar drive home.
>The sun is beginning to set behind the horizon.
>It’s shining directly into your eyes.
“Fucking sun.”
>You’ve followed these roads so many times that you don’t even need to think about where you’re going.
>Each turn is automatic.
>The vibration and sound of the engine is hypnotizing; you give your head a shake to keep yourself awake.
>Today was an unremarkable day.
>”Are you ready, Anonymous?” asks a voice from the backseat.
>You freak out and swerve off the road like an idiot.
>You feel brief weightlessness before impacting a tree and blacking out.

>…
>Head hurts, legs hurt, everything hurts.
>You can hear voices nearby but don’t really care.
>Why are you on the ground?
>Because you crashed your car.
>Fucking shit sucks.
>The voices your hearing are loud and urgent but you still don’t care.
>You open your eyes to take in your surroundings.
>It’s very dark, and you’re lying between a dumpster and a brick wall.
>This is not where you crashed your car.
>A cute female voice catches your attention.
>She’s clearly terrified and holding back tears.
>The other voices sound rough and threatening.
>You turn onto your side to look out from behind the dumpster.
>You see at least three people in the shadow of a tall building.
>You realize you’re in a dark alley, late at night, and about to witness a mugging or rape.
>What do?
>Before you can do anything, the female screams for help.
>The aggressors lose their shit and attack her.
>You still can’t see what the fuck is going on.
>Suddenly a light shines from the end of the alley and you see everything.
>They’re all ponies.

>What the fuck?

>The two male ponies stop kicking the shit out of the little pink female pony.
>They turn to look at the new arrivals: an orange cowgirl pony and a purple unicorn pony with a glowing horn.

>What the fuck?!

>Cowgirl pony delivers a bone-shattering kick to one of the attackers’ jaws.
>Purple unicorn pony throws the other into the wall beside you with her unicorn pony magic.
>The cute pink pony is a bleeding mess, barely conscious.
>”Can ya hear me, Pinkie?” asks the orange one.
>No response from Pinkie.
>”Pinkie?” she persists.
>The purple one’s legs are shaking.
>Neither of them notices the pony beside you has picked himself up and is silently approaching them from behind.
>You notice.
“Behind you!”
>Orange pony sees him and takes him out with a swift kick to the head.
>Now her and her friend are looking at you.
>You’re still awkwardly wedged between the dumpster and the wall.
>You feel dizzy; everything is going dark.
>You black out again.

>…
>Wake up again.
>Was it all a dream?
>You open your eyes.
>You’re on an unfamiliar couch in an unfamiliar hotel room.
>What the fuck happened last night?
>Were you drugged?
>Magical talking colourful ponies do not exist.
>The door to this room has a doorknob, how would ponies use a doorknob?

>Doorknob turns; pony enters.
>”Oh good, you’re awake. I’m Twilight Sparkle.”
>What the fuck?
>There’s a purple unicorn named Twilight Sparkle talking to you.
>Her huge adorable eyes blink twice.
>”What’s your name?”
>Shit, what is your name?
>”Uh, can you talk?”
“Anon. Yes, I can talk. You can call me Anon. Hi.”
>”Hi Anon. Um, what are you? If you don’t mind me asking… I’ve seen and read about a lot of different creatures, but never anything like you.”
“I’m a human.”
>”Fascinating! And, where do you come from?”
“Where am I?”
>”You’re in Manehattan… In Equestria.”
“What the fuck? Sorry. I have no idea where that is.”
>”You don’t know where Manehattan is?” She sounds surprised.
“I’ve never heard of Manehattan or Equestria.’
>Twilight looks puzzled.
>”How did you end up in the middle of a country you’ve never heard of?”
>You just shrug.
>The door opens once more and the orange one enters.
>She has a saddlebag filled with food.
>”Applejack, you’re back. This is Anon. Anon, Applejack.”
>”Oh, howdy, Anon. Thanks for savin’ us last night.”
>You smile.
>Applejack turns to Twilight.
>”Did Pinkie wake up while I was gone?”
>”Yes, for about a minute. Her condition isn’t improving.”
>You follow the ponies into the bedroom to check on Pinkie.
>She’s sleeping on the bed, cut up and bruised.
“Why didn’t you take her to a hospital?”
>”It’s a long story, Anon. I’ll tell ya when we have time. Right now we have to take care of some things. Would ya mind helpin’ me wash these sheets?”
>Twilight levitates Pinkie out of the bed and puts the bed sheets and blanket into a basket.
>They are filthy, bloody and smell as if Pinkie had urinated on them.
“Can’t the cleaners deal with this?”
>”There are no cleaners.” Applejack tells you.

>Applejack lets you eat and shower before helping her with the sheets.
>You feel much more relaxed and content now.
>You both leave the hotel room to go wash them in the laundry room downstairs.
>The building is very empty and quiet.
“Where is everyone?”
>”This hotel has been closed for weeks, Anon.”
>”What?”
>”Twilight, Pinkie and I decided to stay here so we could stay hidden.”
“So that’s why you didn’t want to take Pinkie to a hospital? Why are you hiding?”
>”Like I said, it’s a long story. Do you know the princesses Celestia and Luna?”
“No.”
>”The ponies responsible for raisin’ the sun and moon everyday?”
“Wow. Uh, that’s not how day and night works where I’m from.”
>”About a week ago the sun and the moon suddenly stopped movin’. Turns out both princesses had vanished. Twilight decided the six of us should go to Canterlot to try to figure out where they were, but they had disappeared without a trace.”
“The six of you?”
>”Twilight, Pinkie Pie, me, and our other three friends Fluttershy, Rarity and Rainbow Dash. Anyway, there were no clues whatsoever as to where Princess Celestia and Princess Luna had gone. We started askin’ ponies around the city for information, and that’s when we started bein’ attacked! We think somepony is targetin’ us because of our investigation.”
“Is that why those ponies attacked Pinkie Pie?”
>”No, I think those were just a couple of good for nothin’ wrongdoers. Crime has been on the rise in Equestria ever since the two ponies that run the country disappeared. The fact that we haven’t had daylight in about a week doesn’t help the situation.”
>The two of you have arrived at the laundry room.
>There is no washer or dryer, there are only a few tubs, washboards, and a clothesline outside the window.
>Applejack begins filling a tub with water.
>You see the moon just above the horizon, as if it had only been minutes since the sun set.
“Where are the rest of your friends?”
>”Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash and Rarity? They’re back home in Ponyville. Twilight and I left in a hurry.”
>You have filled up your own tub.
>Applejack washes Pinkie’s blanket while you wash her bedsheet.
>”Pinkie Pie does a lot of things I don’t understand, and yesterday she came here to Manehattan with no explanation. We came with her to keep her safe.”
>The warm soapy water has turned a gross reddish colour.
>You and Applejack drain the water and start over.
>It starts to sink in that you’re in a different fucking universe, possibly forever.
>You may never see your friends or family again.
>You feel cold.
“Twilight said she had never seen or heard of humans before. How will other ponies react to me?”
>”We have a lot of different creatures here in Equestria, Anon. I wouldn’t worry too much about fittin’ in. Besides, who cares what anypony thinks? I’ll be your friend!”
>Applejack looks up from her work and gives you a warm smile.
>You return the smile while resisting the urge to hug her.
>Applejack is best pone.

>You and Applejack return to the hotel room with the clean sheets.
>As soon as you enter, Twilight calls from the bedroom.
>Pinkie is waking up.
>You gather around the bed while Pinkie struggles to sit up.
>She looks at Twilight and Applejack, and then she sees you.
>”Hi! I’m Pinkie P-Owww.”
>She falls back onto the bed in pain.
>”Try not to move, Pinkie. I don’t know the extent of your injuries.” Says Twilight.
>”I’m Pinkie Pie.” She finishes her introduction.
“I’m Anon. Nice to meet you.”
>You shake her hoof.
>Twilight is impatient.
>”Pinkie, you have some explaining to do. First you leave Ponyville to come to Manehattan. Applejack and I come along for your protection, still you decide to wander away from us into some dark backstreet and end  up getting beaten by those thugs. We would all be dead if Anon wasn’t there! Why have you been so unreasonably spontaneous recently?”
>”I’m always unreasonably spontaneous, Twilight.”
>Pinkie giggles weakly.
>”But the reason I came here wasn’t spontaneousness! The creepy voice told me to!”
>”Creepy voice?”
>”Yesterday I started hearing a voice in my head. He told me that a visitor from another world would be arriving in Equestria, and that he would die if we didn’t find him. The voice told me exactly where to go, and I could tell he was being sincere, even if he creeped me out.”
>”Anon.”
>The ponies all look at you.
>”Are you from another universe?” asks Twilight.
“Yeah, I guess I am. What did the voice sound like, Pinkie. I heard a voice in the back of my car before I cam here.”
>”I don’t know. Kind of scary, but not unfriendly. Not friendly either. What did he tell you, Anon?”
>You think back to your last moments on Earth.
>Was that yesterday?
>There are no ‘days’ here anymore.
“He just asked if I was ready…”
>There is silence as you all think.
>It is interrupted by the sound of the front door opening in the other room.
>This hotel has been closed for weeks.
No one is supposed to know you are here.