This is E3

Come one, come all!
It’s the first day of E3
Guess what all the buzzwords mean
Come one, come all!
Time to laugh at all the lies
See that guy who’s starting to cry
Come and join the shit show...
E3
Once a year we have a sticky thread around
Dedicated to the greatest show in town
Every dev is nervous, trying to calm down
Once again it’s time for E3 day
It’s the show we break down to laugh and cry
It’s the show where every host will certainly lie
Every trailer is pre-rendered at this feast of hype

This is E3
Every demo is just lazy
This is E3
Everyone is acting crazy
Gimmicks, physics engine for the bait
They don’t even give a release date

This is E3
Remember Mr. Caffeine Man?
This is E3
No English for the dev from Japan
Bad jokes, tech woes, something will go wrong
And we’ll laugh at the next-gen crap
And we’ll sneer at all the remakes
All because it’s time for E3 day

Come one, come all!
Hurry, hurry before they’re gone
See the indies tripping balls
Come one, come all!
See the king of all the hype
Try not to laugh at his height
Welcome Todd Howard
Lie!

Here it is, the show will be starting soon
Here it is, the hype machine running on fumes
Time to see what they got in store for this year
Lights go out and then it’s time to cheer
Post a picture of the game breaking on stage
See the devs sweating and trying to escape
Could this be the moment we’ve been waiting for all day?
Why?

Now we have the Ps4 with no new games
Just an upgrade for 4K and a bunch of claims
They’re afraid their crowd will turn to the master race
Look at that you can see the fear on his face
The Xbone’s exclusives are on pc too
Why bother with a console, isn’t it true?
But then Phil Spencer wore a t-shirt for Battletoads
What did he mean?

This is E3
Here comes Sean, what will he play
This is E3
“It’s procedural, I can’t say!”
See the tits on that Nintendo chick
For we need an E3 king to pick

Everybody!
Once a year we have a sticky thread around
Hail to the thread
Dedicated to the greatest show in town
Oh, what a thread!
Every dev is nervous, trying to calm down
Anons, post your pics!
Once again it’s time for E3 day
We’ve never had one like this!

It’s the day we all laugh at this industry
From us you won’t get any sympathy
Once a year we see their tricks
Where the lies will never stick
For the change to see something good
And pick a dev who’ll put the fun
Back in E3 day
E3 wrap-up
All the memes and no gameplay, E3 thread archived.