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[FLUTTERRAPE] Three Anons One Pit

Nov 29th, 2012
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  1. >Day 15 in Equestria
  2. >You are Anon
  3. >So are the other 2 guys sleeping in the same bed as you
  4. >Sort of
  5. >Getting torn from your world and forced into this one had some strange effects
  6. >Namely the two other Anons being brought into existence
  7. >You stare at the ceiling for a while and think about how weird your life has become
  8. >Look at the window to your bedroom
  9. >A flying horse wearing a mailbag flies into a tree
  10. >The sad part is that it's not the weirdest thing you've seen since you came here
  11. >Sigh
  12. >Sit up between the two Anons and crawl off the end of the bed
  13. >Look back at the other two, who are still snoozing
  14. >The bed is tiny, and you don't even need covers since you're all squeezed together for warmth
  15. >It's not that bad.
  16. >It's just two clones of you. So no one can judge you
  17. >Walk downstairs and eat cereal for about 10 minutes while staring blankly at a wall
  18. >Look at the clock
  19. >7:29
  20. >Here we go
  21. >7:30
  22. >The clock chimes once to signal a half-hour
  23. >There's a knock on the door
  24. >Aaaaand go
  25. >"IF THAT FUCKING PONY IS HERE AGAIN I'LL RIP IT'S SPINE OUT AND CHOKE IT WITH IT."
  26. >Hear a small "eep" from behind the door
  27. >Also hear the two Anons get up and walk downstairs
  28. >Go over to the door
  29. >Open it
  30. Hi Fluttershy
  31. >"H-hello Anon... Umm... Which one are you again?"
  32. I'm the normal one
  33. >Her ears perk up
  34. >"O-oh g-good. I was afraid I got the angry one again"
  35.  
  36. 1/10
  37.  
  38. Nah. It's good. What do you want this time?
  39. >Lean against the door and give her a flat look
  40. >"W-well I just wanted to know what umm..."
  41. Spit it out, Fluttershy. We've done this for 8 days in a row now.
  42. >"Do you think you could walk around n-naked today? The other ponies feel uncomfortable around you when you're w-wearing so many clothes..."
  43. That's bullshit and you know it.
  44. >She hides behind her mane
  45. >"Oh... Yeah, sorry..."
  46. Anything else?
  47. >"W-well"
  48. Cool
  49. >Slam the door
  50. >Fucking horse
  51. >Walk into the kitchen and see the other two Anons
  52. >The one eating your cereal looks up
  53. >"Did ya' kill her?"
  54. Nope.
  55. >"Pussy."
  56. >He goes back to eating
  57. >Look at the other one staring out the window
  58. >He turns and beams at you
  59. >"Isn't it absolutely beautiful today?"
  60. >God you look creepy when you smile that much
  61. Yeah, it's a nice day. So what's the plan for today?
  62. >"Murder."
  63. >"Reading!"
  64. >"Genocide."
  65. >"Baking?"
  66. >"Some other form of death that involves these disgusting animals"
  67. >"A picnic!"
  68. Those are all horrible ideas. I'm ashamed of both of you.
  69. >"We are you, dickwad"
  70. Whatever.
  71. >"Well, have you got any better ideas, grumpy?"
  72. >Think for a second
  73. Baking.
  74. >"But I sa-"
  75. At Sugarcube Corner
  76. >"That the place with that pink one?"
  77. Yeah.
  78. >"I'll kill her and fuck the corpse"
  79. Of course you will.
  80.  
  81. 2/10
  82.  
  83. >A few minutes later you're all walking down the road.
  84. >Silence between you three
  85. >Look to your left
  86. >The happy you is humming and walking with a bounce to his step
  87. >Look to your right
  88. >The angry you is kicking rocks at nearby animals
  89. Yeah. I think I know what I'm calling you two from now on. We can't go on being called "Anon"
  90. >"I don't know why we don't use our normal name! Andrew is such a lovely name, afterall"
  91. >"Fag"
  92. Fag.
  93. >He frowns
  94. >"Well what do you suggest
  95. >You point at him
  96. You're now called Happynon.
  97. >You pat the other one on the back
  98. And this grumpy fuck is called Angernon.
  99. >"Those are the worst fucking names i've ever heard. You're lucky you're as handsome as me or I would have dragged you behind that bush and throttled you."
  100. Yeah I think they're pretty good as well. What do you think, happy?
  101. >"I think they're lovely"
  102. >You all carry on walking and promptly fall down a pitfall
  103.  
  104. 3/10
  105.  
  106. >"WHAT THE FUCK"
  107. >"Oh gosh."
  108. Ahh shit.
  109. >You all look up at the culprit for this cruel prank
  110. >A familiar Yellow mare looks down at you sheepishly
  111. >"S-so is being in a giant pit your fetish?"
  112. >"HOW THE FUCK WOULD THAT EVEN WORK?"
  113. >She winces
  114. >"I umm.. I d-don't know..."
  115. >"WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE, I WILL BREAK EVERYTHING YOU LOVE."
  116. >"E-everything?"
  117. >"EVERYTHING."
  118. >She *eeps* again and look at you
  119. >"D-do you like my hole, Anon? T-there's plenty more where it came from!"
  120. >She turns around and shows you all her rear
  121. Oh god why
  122. >"Oh fucking hell"
  123. >"That's revolting"
  124. >She faces you again
  125. >"Y-you don't like it?... Oh..."
  126. When you woke up this morning, what made you think that digging a massive pit in the middle of a road would be a good idea?
  127. >"I told you man, she's retarded"
  128. >"W-well, Anon. I thought you might swoon for me if you saw this pit... Maybe think 'wow! Fluttershy has done such a good job with this pit! I think i'll show her my... hot... dick...'"
  129. >She trails off and starts drooling
  130. >Happynon giggles at this
  131. >You and Angernon glare at him
  132. >"Oh, what? She can be adorable at times. Even if she is a little bit odd"
  133. >"I hate you so fucking much"
  134. >Happynon frowns
  135. >"Well we're going to be down here for a while, so I think you'd better get used to me."
  136. >"I AM you, you insipid shitstain."
  137. >"Well then I guess you just insulted yourself, silly!"
  138. >Angernon is taken aback and starts trying to blurt out a response
  139. >He fails, sits down, folds his arms and sulks
  140. Welp. I don't think this day could get any worse.
  141.  
  142. 4/10
  143.  
  144. >"Yoo hoo! Anon! I'm back now!"
  145. You left?
  146. >"Y-yes. And now, since you're all stuck here all day, I can guess your fetish!"
  147. >Angernon looks at you with glistening eyes
  148. >"Kill me."
  149. Later. Look, Fluttershy. Just get us out of here and I'll take you out to dinner or some shit like that.
  150. >She giggles at you
  151. >"Silly, I know you're lying to me! I have you just where I want you now! And nothing can take you away from me!"
  152. >Angernon starts crying
  153. >Happynon sighs
  154. >"Fluttershy, darling. Can't we work something out? I'd be happy to spend time with you if you wish. I'm identical to Anon here, I just have a nicer attitude. Doesn't that sound like fun?"
  155. >He looks at her with a desperate look on his face
  156. >She stares back with a dreamy look in her eye
  157. >"Oooh~ I'd like that very much... But you can do it once I'm done with you three"
  158. You're seriously going to keep us in a fucking pit all day? We need to eat you know.
  159. >"I'll bring you food"
  160. And we need to drink-
  161. >"And drinks"
  162. And we will obviously need to use the toilet-
  163. >"Dig a hole"
  164. We're in a hole.
  165. >"Another hole, silly"
  166. You're sick.
  167. >"Shush, Anon. Momma will make you want her by day's end"
  168. >Angernon stops crying
  169. >He glares up at her and points a finger
  170. >Opens his mouth
  171. >And begins a 30 minute scream-rant about the things he'll do to her after he gets out of the pit
  172. >Some of which you don't think are even possible
  173. >Especially the one about the Tea Leaves.
  174. >That one was just silly.
  175. >Sit down and listen to him scream
  176. >Happynon sits next to you and rests his head on your shoulders
  177. >It's not gay if it's you
  178.  
  179. 5/10
  180.  
  181. >The day goes on
  182. >Angernon screams
  183. >Happynon pleads
  184. >You reason
  185. >Fluttershy tries to guess your fetishes
  186. >"Tentacles?"
  187. >"DEAR FUCKING GOD NO MAKE THEM GO AWAY"
  188. >She mutters a few words and the hell rift in the middle of the pit floor closes, taking the lovecraftian horrors with it
  189. That was fuckin' crazy.
  190. >"Yes... It was quite, horrible..."
  191. >Poor Happynon. This is really taking a toll on him
  192. >You put an arm around his shoulders and give a reassuring squeeze
  193. >He smiles at you
  194. >Fluttershy sees this
  195. >"Oh! Are homosexual relationships your fetish, Anon?"
  196. IT'S NOT GAY IF IT'S ME
  197. >"Sure it isn't, faggot"
  198. Shut up, Angernon.
  199. >"Well umm... Just a second"
  200. >She runs off, leaving you three in silence
  201. How long have we been down here? Who has the watch?
  202. >Angernon pulls the watch you three share out of his pocket
  203. >"It's 5. We've been down here for nearly 8 fucking hours"
  204. God damn.
  205. >Happynon taps you on the shoulder
  206. >"Andrew... If we get out of here, I'd be happy to answer the door to Fluttershy in the morning from now on"
  207. >What a trooper
  208. That won't be necessary. I don't think we're going to make it out of this alive
  209. >"I hear that. I can't believe that bitch tried to feed us Hay. Doesn't she know what humans eat? Fuck i'm hungry"
  210. We all are, man. Keep it together
  211.  
  212. 6/10
  213.  
  214. >Angernon squirms
  215. What's up?
  216. >"I've sort of... Uhh, been holding it in all day"
  217. >Oh shit no.
  218. Ok. Relax, we'll dig a hole
  219. >"I'm not going in a fucking hole. Toilets are what separates us from the animals"
  220. Ponies have toilets you retard.
  221. >"Toilets and Opposable thumbs"
  222. Smartass
  223. >"I'm not shitting a hole, Anon."
  224. >"Y-you can shit on me... If you want..."
  225. >"OH FOR FUCKS SAKE"
  226. >Look up and see Fluttershy
  227. >She's got a lantern and a sleeping bag
  228. You must be fucking joking. I'm not spending a night in a pit
  229. >She smiles
  230. >"Well it's not like you're going anywhere. And neither am I so get comfortable"
  231. >She throws a few apples down
  232. >Happynon squeals
  233. >"Yes! Food!"
  234. >He chews his apple with a content look on his face
  235. >God that's cute
  236. >Fuck off, brain.
  237. >"Thank Christ for that, I'm starved"
  238. You sure you should eat anything, Angernon? You already need to go
  239. >"I'll hold it in. If I die of clogged up faecal matter in my rectum I'm blaming Banana Hush."
  240. >Happynon lowers his apple
  241. >"I was eating..."
  242. >"Suck it up, you pansy"
  243. >Look up at the heavens
  244. God, when did I wrong you so?
  245.  
  246. 7/10
  247.  
  248. >Fluttershy gasps
  249. >"I-I'VE GOT IT!"
  250. Again, how did I wrong you?
  251. >"Y-you three should all make out! Ohh I can't believe I didn't think of this until now!"
  252. >Angernon stares at her
  253. >"You what, mate?"
  254. >She clops her hooves excitedly
  255. >"If you all have gay sex right now in this pit, you're sure to love it! And then i'll love it! And then you'll love me!"
  256. >"Your logic is utterly fucked"
  257. And so will you if she has her way. Come on, guys. We need to get out of here.
  258. >"But how, Andrew?"
  259. Dunno. We'll think of something. Three minds are better than one.
  260. >"But what if it's all the same mind?"
  261. >Damn. That's surprisingly clever.
  262. >Smart and cute, you never even saw it in yourself-
  263. >FUCK YOU BRAIN
  264. >All three of you put your heads together and start planning so that Fluttershy can't hear
  265. >"A-are you all kissing down there? Please say yes..."
  266. >Surprisingly, Angernon has some pretty awesome ideas.
  267. >Digging hand and footholes in the walls of the pit
  268. >Standing on each other's shoulders
  269. >Digging a tunnel with the plates you have down here from the Hay meal you got
  270. >You nod your head approvingly
  271. Nice ideas, Angry.
  272. >"No problem. I just want to get out of here"
  273. >"I agree. I miss the sun on my face..."
  274. >Look at Happynon
  275. >You gotta get him out of here, even if you and Angrynon die. He doesn't deserve any of this.
  276. >You probably should have mentioned earlier, Angrynon and Happynon aren't just physical manifestations of your emotions. They ARE your emotions.
  277. >You are incapable of feeling happiness or anger since they came into being.
  278. >It makes having them around that much more enjoyable and useful, since they can channel your emotions when you can't.
  279. Ok. I think I have a plan.
  280.  
  281. 8/10
  282.  
  283. >You all wait until nightfall
  284. >Fluttershy bids you all goodnight and sweet dreams and goes off to sleep
  285. >After a while you hear her muttering in her sleep
  286. >"mmmm... three dicks at once..."
  287. >Fuckin' Horse.
  288. >You pull the other two in
  289. Ok. Lets move.
  290. >You all carefully break the 3 plates in half, creating 9 half pieces
  291. >They're made of porcelain, so it's a tough material.
  292. >You press them into the mud-walls of the pit and test them once they're far enough in
  293. >They can support your weight
  294. >Slowly and surely climb the wall, planting more foot/hand holds with the plates.
  295. >Eventually you climb out the top and beckon to the other two
  296. >Angernon climbs up there faster than a monkey and starts humping the ground when he gets out
  297. >Happynon is next
  298. >You hold out your hand and take his to help him up
  299. >His hands are so soft...
  300. >BRAIN. STOP.
  301. >Once you're all out there are high-fives and pats on the back all round
  302. >This wakes up Fluttershy
  303. >"o-OH! You're umm... Out..."
  304. Yeah. We are.
  305. >Angernon cracks his knuckles
  306. >"I'm gonna enjoy this"
  307. >Happynon holds him back
  308. >"Don't, we can settle this without violence..."
  309. >Angernon shrugs him off and walks up to Fluttershy
  310. >He grins maliciously at her
  311. >He forces her out the sleeping back and rips it to pieces
  312. >Once the cord that tightens the back is free, he uses it to bind Fluttershy's wings as hard as he can
  313. >"O-ouch... Please... That hurts!"
  314. >"Good."
  315. >He stands back and looks at her proudly
  316. >"There we are!"
  317. >And punts her into the pit
  318.  
  319. 9/10
  320.  
  321. >You can't help it
  322. >You laugh
  323. >You don't feel happy at all, but you just felt it was the right thing to do.
  324. Nice work, Angry.
  325. >He grins at you
  326. >"I'm pretty awesome aren't I?"
  327. Will she be ok?
  328. >"Oh yeah. I left her some... Food..."
  329. >You notice he looks more relaxed-
  330. >OH DEAR GOD
  331. >You grab the lantern and light up the pit with it
  332. >Fluttershy is lying in a pile of Angrypoop
  333. That's... Brilliant.
  334. >Angernon laughs
  335. >"Come on, I'm hungry. I wanna eat at that Sugarcube place. After this I feel like kissing that pink one. She'll be a welcome sight"
  336. Wow, really?
  337. >"Nah. If she looks at me i'll break her face. But I'm still pretty hungry"
  338. Time?
  339. >He looks at the watch
  340. >"11 o Clock. Think they'll still be open?"
  341. Only one way to find out.
  342. >You all head down the path into Ponyville, watching out for any giant holes
  343. >Angernon walks on ahead, fuelled by his hunger
  344. >You and Happynon walk side by side
  345. >Look at him in the moonlight
  346. >He smiles at you
  347. >"Thanks for getting us out, Andrew"
  348. >Put an arm round his shoulder and pull him in close
  349. >Feel his hand slide into your back pocket and stay there as you walk into town
  350. >Its not gay if it's you.
  351.  
  352. 10/10
  353. THE END.
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