dmt is a cactus

Kektus plant (Cacturne) @ Life Orb
Ability: Water Absorb
Shiny: Yes
EVs: 252 Atk / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Adamant Nature
- Swords Dance
- Drain Punch
- Seed Bomb
- Sucker Punch

hawt fiya (Chandelure) @ Choice Scarf
Ability: Flash Fire
Shiny: Yes
EVs: 252 SpA / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Modest Nature
IVs: 30 Atk / 30 Def
- Fire Blast
- Shadow Ball
- Memento
- Trick

not hax (Jirachi) @ Leftovers
Ability: Serene Grace
Shiny: Yes
EVs: 252 HP / 224 SpD / 32 Spe
Careful Nature
- Wish
- Thunder Wave
- Iron Head
- U-turn

racist (Krookodile) @ Leftovers
Ability: Intimidate
EVs: 252 HP / 4 Atk / 252 Def
Impish Nature
- Knock Off
- Earthquake
- Taunt
- Stealth Rock

no this is patrik (Starmie) @ Leftovers
Ability: Natural Cure
EVs: 252 SpA / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Timid Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Psyshock
- Scald
- Recover
- Rapid Spin

popcorn (Whimsicott) @ Leftovers
Ability: Prankster
Shiny: Yes
EVs: 252 HP / 4 SpA / 252 Spe
Timid Nature
- Moonblast
- Encore
- U-turn
- Leech Seed