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- > With hammers, nails, pliers, saws, screwdrivers, and a blowtorch you thin the herd slowly
- > Relishing in the fear and pain in their screams and faces.
- > "EEEEAAGHH! BIIIIIG HUWTIES HEWP!SANTAH NUU NICE! SANTA MEANIE! I SOWWY NUU BE BAD!"
- > Wittew weggies broken by crushing blows
- > "WEGGIES HEWP FWUFFY NUU BE MEANIE HEWP WUN! PWEEEEASE HEWP! HEWP FWUFFY!"
- > Nails in hooves, eyes, ears, no-nos, poopies, through legs into the ground, and in every other body part imaginable
- > "SQEEEEEEEEE FOOTSIES HUWTY! Whew offa fwuffys nuu see dawk! WHA? I NUU HEAW FWUFFIES! EEEEEEEEEEEEE- NUU SPECIAW PWACE HUWTY BIIIIIIG!"
- > Pliers remove the useless nubs of teeth one by one, toungues torn outtear off tails, and a personal favorite remove no-nos in the worst way possible
- > "AAAAAAAAAAAH!! MAAH TOOUFIESSH HHUUWHHIEE! WHAAH? GHAGHBALA HHOUGHE WHEW GHOO?! Wha' you doin Santah? Why touch fwuffy no-no's? Nuu! Nuu huwt Nuu NUUUUUUU AAAAH!!"
- > Saws cut into fluff and flesh removing legs, severing spines, bisecting, disecting, and disemboweling
- > "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH FWUFFY WEGGIES NUU WOWK NUU FEEW WEGGIES WHY?! WHY NUU WUN?! WHY HUWT FWUFFY?"
- > Screwdrivers slowly twist into flesh and give lobotomies with interesting results
- > "Wha' dat fingie? WHAA HUWTY HEAD! HUWT- Wha? Whew... whew am I? Who... am I? WHAT AM I HEWP! NUU KNOW WHAT I AM! WHAT IS MY PUWPOUSE?!"
- > The blowtorch, though smaller than the standard issue flame thrower, has great effect on the flamable fuffy fluff
- > "Fiwe pwetty! You nuu huwt fwuffy? Iss so wawm! Wuv wawm! W.. wawm too wawm santah! Hewp! Wawm too wawm! HEWP HEWP! FWUFFY BUWNIN! HEA-aAAAAAA! HEEEEWWP FWUFFY!"
- > Ah the cacophony of screams an pleas for wuv, huggies, and huwties go way sound like the sweetest bells to your ears
- > After five hours the sun has almost set
- > Looks like you've enjoyed yourself for a little too long
- > Now comes your favorite part
- > A shame you can't make it last
- > The dams and foals are sitting by themselves with their smarty still tied to his mare
- > They have shit and pissed themselves with fear like all other fluffies many times today, but they manage to shit again when they see you turn to them
- > A wide grin has settled itself on your face like a crecent moon or cheschire cat
- > Wading through the shit, blood, and piss covered field stepping on or kicking injured and dying fluffies out of the way
- > "OWIES! WHY? I SOWWWWWWY! SO SOWWWWWWY!" "EEEEEE HUWTY!" *Crunch* "GHABFFHAAAHAA"
- > With blood, shit, piss, and fluff staining your body you look like a dirty santa
- > Minus the beard
- > Picking up a bouquet of foals you gently snip the tie letting them tumble out of your hands
- > You are close enough to the ground that they are unhurt, minor owies aside
- > "Waa mummah, whew mummah, hungwy, scawed, wan mummah, mummah"
- > Grabbing one of the foals you hold it up to the dams
- > "Gif bebeh nuu huwty! Bebeh nuu bad! Hewp bebeh!"
- > You grab it's leg with your finger and thumb and slowly begin to twist
- > It chirps and cries and flails its other legs
- > "Mummah! Mummah! Wuv! Mummah! Wuv! Mummah! Mummah! Hewp! HEWP! EEE EEE EEE EEEEE!"
- > You slowly twist its leg till you feel the bones crack and the leg is completely backwards
- > "NUUUUUU NUU HUWT BABEH! MUMMAH HEWP BEBEH MUMMA SAVE BEBEH! GHa!"
- > You stuff the baby into her mouth and twist the other legs one by one
- > The dam screams but doesn't bite down trying to save the baby
- > Then with all of his legs broken you turn him around his head wet with drool but still chirping for help but not speaking
- > "EEE! EEE! EEE! EEE! EEE! EEE!"
- > You turn the foal around and squeeze hard sliding your fingers down the body towards his back
- > Right into the dams mouth
- > "Nuuu! Nuu taste pwetty! Why bebeh make bad poopies on mamah?!"
- > The chirping pick ups and the foal lets out a final scream as its organs are forced out of its anus into the dams open mouth
- > You repeat this process with each foal on the ground each chirping for help and wuv
- > And each dying screaming
- > Once you are done you notice the dam has prematurely birthed her own foals
- > The underdeveloped ponies are barely breathing and try to cry out but are unable to speak or crawl
- > Useless leg nubs scrape on the ground and they roll around for help
- > You pick these up and show them to the dam who is now mobile but seems unaware that she has birthed
- "Your babys are here you bad momma, you didn't clean them"
- > "WAN BEBEHS I CWEAN I NUU BAD DEY NUU BAD NUUUU HWUTY SANTAH!"
- > They're still calling you santa, this is hillarious
- "Well then, CLEAN THEM UP!"
- > You force the tiny underdeveloped foals into the dams mouth one at a time
- > She gasps and gargles for help but the smarty has long since stopped fighting he simply sits hugging his mare with his free leg
- > The five foals are in her mouth
- > You close her mouth shut and the squirming foals fight for their lives against her mouth
- > She swallows, a reflex, but she immediately starts screaming
- > "NUUUUUUU- BEBEHS IN TUMMY! I SOWWY BEBEHS! I NUU MEAN TO EAT BEBEHS! HEWP! HEWP MISTAH! BEBEHS NEE HEWP! NUU NUMMMIES! HEWP! HEWWWWP!"
- > She forgot you were Santah, pity
- "Okay, I'll get your babys out."
- > "Oh! Thank you hooman! Thank you!"
- > You flip her over her stomach moving with babys in her
- > And take out your hack saw
- > Those of you in the audience can probably see where this is going
- > Her joy turns to abject horror as you saw into her stomach
- > And then her stomach
- > And through her spine
- > You open her like a fluffy candy
- > The foals, some cut in half, others dissolved from acid are all dead.
- > "NUUUU BEBEHHHHS I SOOO SOWWWY HHH- HH- I SOOO SOWWY BEBEhs I i.. so... soww..."
- > She dies cut in half with all her brood dead.
- > The other dams share simmilar fates.
- > Some plea for their lives, their foals, for huggies, wuv, sowwy, but they all die in excruciating agony.
- > Ah, there is no feeling like this in the world.
- > With all the foals and dams dead, except for the smarties you pack up
- > All around you shitting, bleeding, moaning fluffies beg for huggies to make the pain go away
- > You take your machete to each
- > The cleanup team doesn't report abuse but won't clean up if the fluffies aren't dead
- > No paycheck if your job isn't done
- > Doesn't mean you can't have some fun
- > With smarty, mare, and foals zip tied together in hand you return to the van to have some extra special fun with them
- > The farmer takes one look at you and frowns
- > "Did the little shits get what they deserve?"
- "If I could have it my way, they would still be getting what they deserve"
- > Farmer smiles and walks inside
- > Creepy fuck but hey
- > So are you
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