Don't Litter in the Woods

														Don’t Litter in the Woods

	Chad and Mitch made their way along the trail. Wind rustled through the trees, and birds chirped noisily. Loudest of all were the pair walking the path. One was dressed in athletic shorts, with a t shirt that bore the logo of a sports team, while another wore jeans and a band t shirt.

	Chad and Mitch were college students. They and a larger group of their friends had taken advantage of the last week of summer to head on up to Sam Houston National Forest for a little getaway. Basically, they had come to get drunk, get high, and get lucky. Unfortunately, the Texas heat was sweltering, and the group had forgotten two of their coolers in the car when they hiked out. Chad and Mitch drew the short straws, and thus it was their mission to retrieve the aforementioned coolers. Of course, they brought along a little liquid courage.

	“Hey Mitch, check this out!” said the one in jeans. He raised the beer can he held in his hands, and gulped down the last drops of what was inside. He then neatly placed the can on the trail, end up, and kicked it like a soccer ball. It sailed in the air for a good distance, before smacking into the side of a large pine tree, crumpling up.

	“Fuck dude… I’m so crossed.” Mitch tossed what remained of his blunt to the ground. He crushed the beer can in his hand (soaking his hand with cheap beer) and hurled it off, in the direction that Chad’s can had went.

	“Ouch!”

	“Dude… Did you hear that, Chad? It sounded like, like somebody just fuckin’ said ouch, dude. Like out there.” He pointed. “Sounded like a little girl. Fuckin’ creepy, man.”

	“Fuck… I heard it too… What the fuck… Let’s get moving.”

	The two bros began to pick up the pace. Alone and isolated, they were feeling nervous, and wanted to make it back to the relative safety of their campground as soon as possible. They would be around others, and being in the presence of girls would force them to act more bravely.

	Behind them, they could hear a twig snap, and rustling in the brush.

	“There’s something in there, maybe a fucking hog or something! Fuck the coolers, let’s get out of here!”

	A few more steps down the path, and the two litterers found who was stalking them in the woods…

	Something- no, someone, burst from the thick undergrowth, doing a neat little roll before springing upright. It was… a little girl! She couldn’t have been more than ten! Chad and Mitch looked at each other in surprise. It was strange enough that a little girl jumped out in front of them, but the way she was dressed made it even weirder!

	The girl’s skin was pale, and appeared unblemished. Her hair was long, and a deep chestnut color. It flowed down over her shoulders to the small of her back.  Her body was clad in a tight light green leotard, with pink accents and frills. She wore boots that went up to her knees, and green elbow length gloves with similar pink trim. On her head was a green pointed cap. It looked like something a fantasy character would wear, like Gandalf or the witch from Wizard of Oz. Around the hat a pink ribbon was wrapped, which was tied into a cute bow on the side. In one hand, the girl held what looked like a short staff or club. It appeared to be intricately carved, and near the top of it were spiky looking thorns. At the very tip, a pretty flower sprouted. In the other hand, a beer can, which the girl was currently crushing in her hand. If she had not been wearing gloves, Chad and Mitch would have seen her knuckles go white, so hard was her squeezing.

	The girl tossed the can at the two boys’ feet. She looked up at them from under the brim of her hat. Her eyes were creepy looking, an unnatural shade of purple. She looked pissed, and she was breathing heavily, like she was real worked up.

	The two just stared at her.

	“Aren’t you going to pick up your trash!?” The girl barked.

	The girl’s voice sort of stirred Mitch from his shock. “Who- like who the fuck are you?!” He asked the mysterious girl. There was nothing wrong with questioning such a peculiarly dressed girl all alone in the woods.  “Why are you wearing that?”

	“Who are you?” The girl said arrogantly. “Why are you here trashing up my home?” She tossed a lock of her hair over her shoulder. “If you must know, I’m Violet Wildroot. And this is my magical girl outfit.” The expression on her face looked bored, like she was repeating the same piece of info for the 100th time. “And please don’t use bad words. Thanks.”

	“Where are your p-parents?! “ Mitch’s eyes were bulging out of his head. The effects of the alcohol and marijuana were causing his vision to pulse. Was this a hallucination?

	“Parents?” The girl laughed. “I don’t have parents. What do you think I am? An idiot? I can take care of myself. Now pick up the can!”

	Chad nodded and knelt to pick it up. “Chill the fuck out! We’re sorry; just stop being such a little bitch about it!”

	The little girl looked so angry, it seemed like steam was about to come out of her ears. She stamped a little booted foot in the gravel. “I’m. Not. A.” She hesitated a moment, before giving in and repeating the bad word. “BITCH!”

	Mitch held out his hand, praying that he’d sober up soon. “What… What I think he was saying, is that it’s just weird you came outta nowhere looking like a cartoon character. And that you’re a little girl bossing us two around. Just not something we are used to, ya know.”

	“Yeah, bitch.”

	Mitch put his hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Chad, please!” Chad puffed up his chest.

	“Look,” Violet began. “I can tell you two aren’t the brightest. You’re probably already alcoholics. I know you’re potheads. Believe me, as a plant witch, I know all about your precious weed. And I know you two can’t handle it…” Chad looked insulted by Violet’s words, but let her continue. “You probably got here on some dumb athletic scholarship…” Violet waved her free hand around, mocking throwing a ball. “Ooh look at me, I can through a ball, waste money on me for a free education that I won’t take seriously.” She dropped the sarcastic tone. “So, anyways-”

	“FUCK YOU!” Chad screamed. Mitch cringed and put his arm around Chad’s shoulder and turned him away. “We’re sorry, we’re sorry! We are leaving now!” Mitch began to hurry away, Chad in tow.

	“I’m not done yet!” The girl screamed.

	She waved her wand, and there was a great ripping and tearing sound, the sound of something erupting from the earth. The ground shook like a mini earthquake, knocking the two drunks slightly off balance. Before them, a giant hedge grew. It was too tall to jump over, and looked thick.

	Chad ran towards it, breaking Mitch’s hold, and tried to stick his hand through it. It was far too thick. He couldn’t even get his arm up to his wrist in it, and his fingers were poked by thorns as he tried breaking through it. “M-Mitch, what the fuck!” Chad seemed distressed.

	Mitch whirled around to the little girl. “Look, please. I said we were sorry. C-can we just go?”

	Violet made a sweet face. “Yes, you did apologize. But I’m not through with you yet…”

	“FUUCCKKK! YOU!” Chad screamed. He hunched his body over and spread his legs apart. Perhaps he was assuming a football pose, or maybe a wrestling one. He charged, and he was quick.

	Violet was surprised by this, but she was even quicker. “Roots!” With a shake of her wand, a thick root emerged from the ground, snaking around one of Chad’s ankles. He was yanked down hard into the dirt. He looked like he was out like a light.

	“My, that was serious, wasn’t it? Now I really need to come up with a suitable punishment…” Violet walked over to where Chad was prostrate on the ground, and ran her fingers through his hair. She glanced back up at Mitch with a grin. “Perhaps I’ll turn you two into pretty flowers. Yes, I think that will work…”

	Mitch put a hand over his eyes, then leaned over and puked out the nasty canned beans he had for breakfast. Violet started to laugh.

	“Hoot! Hoot!”

	“Wh-what? No! Are you serious! I… I didn’t mean… I’m sorry…”

	Was Violet talking to Mitch? The tone of her voice had certainly taken a 180, and why would she apologize to him?

	“Hoot, hoot!” Mitch looked up to see an owl perched in the branch of a tree… At least… It looked like an owl, but not one he had even seen. It looked oddly alien. What on earth was in this weed!

	“But Puchuu, can I please??? Just this once!” Violet had lost all her anger. Now she sounded like a little girl, whining in the toy aisle for her parents to purchase her another doll.

	“Hoot…”

	“But it’s not fair!” Violet stamped her foot and kicked.

	The owl turned its gaze towards Mitch. The glowing yellow eyes were hypnotizing. Mitch felt his knees go weak, as a wave swept over his consciousness, and he collapsed backwards onto his butt. The owl returned its gaze to Violet. This time, when it opened its beak, it didn’t hoot… it spoke!

	“No Violet-chuu, you can’t turn them into flowers. I won’t allow it!”

	“But they hit me with a can! And they were cussing at me, and one of them tried to beat me up! He tried to beat up a nine year old girl! Can you believe that?!” Violet was about to cry.

	“Yes, they did do those things, but does it really qualify turning them into a flower, Violet-chuu?”

	“Yes! Yes it does!”

	The owl creature seemed unimpressed. “Violet Tansy Wildroot…” The owl used the girls’ full name for emphasis. Her eyes widened, and she blushed.

	“You know I take good care of my flowers!”

	“Enough, Violet. Stop.” The owl’s voice was haunting. It sounded neither male nor female, but it changed pitch to sound more serious.

	“I… I… Okay, Puchuu…”

	“Good girl. Now, release that one from your roots, and then apologize to the conscious one.”

	“Apologize?!”

	“Violet…”

	The little girl’s head hung low as she twisted her wand and caused the roots to slink back into the ground. She blushed bright red and kept her eyes focused on the ground even as she faced Mitch.

	“I-I-I’m sorry…” Violet stuttered.

	“Good.” The owl looked back over at Mitch. “I’m sorry this happened. Violet is still relatively new, and she’s learning things. Now, is there anything you’d like to say to her?”

	Mitch shook his head. “N-no…”

	“Very well. I think she’s had enough scolding for the time being, anyways. I would try to make it up to you, but I’m not sure what else I can do. Well, I think there is one thing...”

	Then, in a flash, the girl and the owl were gone. One more moment passed, and then there was darkness…
																	…
	Mitch woke in his tent. Loud music was playing. What was that? Taylor Swift? He was back at camp… Some time had passed, and he had a hell of a headache. Ugh. What happened? He rolled over in his sleeping bag, searching for the zipper of the tent. He found it, and opened the tent.

	Outside around the campfire were his friends, including the cute coeds, but not Chad. He glanced over to Chad’s tent. It was zipped shut, like his had been. He rubbed his head. Damn, it was so sore. Again, he wondered what had happened to him. He went with Chad, somewhere away from the camp… but why? What was he doing? Coolers, right?

	For a moment, Mitch remembered something. An argument, a little scuffle… An owl, a little girl who claimed to be a witch, a giant hedgerow… Then his memories faded?

	Mitch shook his head. What had he smoked? That shit must’ve been powerful. He made his way towards the campsite, and then sat down next to a hot girl on one of the logs they’d pushed up towards the campsite to use as a seat. The girl was blonde, with a nice rack. Mitch thought her name was Jessica. Glancing across the camp, he could see the two coolers out next to the stove. That’s what he and Chad had done. They went to get the coolers. He was sure there were some nice cold ones in there.

	“Hey, pass me some of that shit I smoked last time. It was fuckin’ fire!” Mitch proudly proclaimed. The girl passed him her blunt, and Mitch raised his hand. One of his friends at the cooler tossed him a beer and he caught it perfectly. Just as he cracked it open, he wondered for a moment if he’d get so fuckin’ baked that he’d see that freaky little girl in her goofy hat again. He laughed to himself, and then took a nice hit before downing the can…