Autotelic Jacks Review - Manatsu no Dramatic (Klaius)

For timing reference if needed, in my ddream the first note falls on 1.467.

1.467 to 11.173
I see no reason to not follow the pr with the freezes completely going with 4321, making this freeze note 4.
About the 16th stream notes, I know you start it halfway through to reflect the rising volume, but that doesn't work so well when the sound is so continuous, so I recommend either starting it from the first note or ignoring it completely.
Additionally, the stream notes should make jumps alongside the beginning of freeze notes too.
It kinda sucks with 3 columns, but try to incorporate some vague PR by clustering groups of notes following the same sound with repeated patterns.

12.055 and 12.408
It's more intuitive to make 12.055 a jump, extend the previous hold up to 12.408 and include the corresponding hold follow up on 12.408.
Cutting the 16th stream was a good choice.

13.026
For consistency, this note in 13.026 should only be included if you layer in the hihat consistently in 12.938, 13.291, 13.379 etc.
It's technically present in every 16th but a x.xx rhythm (like if you included notes in the timestamps I mentioned) works better. You can differentiate the weaker ones like 13.379 by not forcing minijacks.
It's fine to ignore it when it mixes up with stronger sounds like 13.644, although it's also possible to take a '1 arrow per sound' approach to layer it in situations like that.

13.732
The synth that goes on 12.761, 13.114, 13.467, 13.996 and so on is the main hook of this section so you definitely don't want to ignore it here in 13.732.

13.820 to 13.996
Those dumped 24ths don't add much and don't go to anything in particular (that weird vocal-like sound would extend up to 14.173, and would also warrant a similar treatment over 12.761 to 13.114 at least).

13.996 to 15.408
After commiting to the clap sound in the 3 note jack in 13.644, it feels really strange to change the layering scheme completely on 13.996 to ignore its sound like in 13.996, 14.438, 14.879 and 15.144.
Instead of simply making all synth notes jumps and ignoring the rest, try to build a more complete layering from 13.996 to 15.408, possibly including both clap and hihats.

15.585 to 22.467
Should be essentially a repetition of 12.761 to 15.408 layering wise, aside maybe from accenting the proeminent hihat starting on 18.585 to reflect the gradual build up.

22.467 to 23.349
If you want to focus on the new sound by only layering it as jumps, it's better that you remove the starting freeze and make 23.261 a jump.

23.349
It probably better to include a freeze here as the only sound that differentiate this quad from the hand at 23.879 is that fading buzz thingy.

23.879 and 24.055
These two hands should be different to reflect changing sounds

24.055 to 46.291
Your layering approach here is closer that what should've been done in the previous section if you swap the clap with the bass.
The jack usage is generally fine, so I won't comment on that directly. Now to other specifics, noting I might not list repetitions of the same thing:

24.144 and most 16ths right after 4ths
These only make sense if you are following the non-stop melody or percussion, so you shouldn't have rests in places like 24.849, 25.379 or any other 16ths unless you _really_ want to put emphasis in something.
In any case, I think it's good to include them as an explicit build up from the previous section.

25.644, 28.467, 31.291...
Undifferentiated synth hit

29.173, 29.349, 32.173...
Undifferentiated percussion

27.232 to 27.585
Considering there are actual 32nds right after, it's better to differentiate using a different rhythm to dump that sound (e.g. 24ths).

31.555
Disregard what I said about having continuous 16ths, this is fine like this.

46.644 to 52.291
Not a big fan of using mines like that but it's acceptable

52.291 to 74.879
I don't mind dumping 24ths and 32nds to the vocals, but be consistent about it in two ways:
-Use exclusively higher than 16ths rhythms to represent them, otherwise it becomes a confusing mess over the other instruments;
-Be consistent about it by including it over all (or most) vocal hits;
-Be careful to not make it the main source of difficulty in a non-jacky way.
That would affect all the layering of this section so I won't spend much time pointing what is currently done.
My suggestion for layering up to 63.585 would be focusing on bass as jumps (e.g. 52.291, 52.820, 53.349, 53.879, 54.055...), clap as hands (e.g. 54.408) and ignoring the continuous 16th stream.
After that you could mix up the hihat 16ths (e.g. 64.467 to 64.644) as 3 note jacks.
Given the context of the jax pack, I recommend trying to pattern the dumped 24ths so to force a lot of 12th jacks either through trills or by 'clashing' with the layered jumps/hands.

74.879 to 86.173
See previous note about dumping the vocals.
For the sake of making it easier so to fit the music, it might be better to ignore vocals and simply follow the continuous 16th stream in this section.
Alternatively, considering how continuous the vocal is, 24th trills might be good too. For the sake of jax, trills would be great actually.

86.173 to 93.232
See previous note about dumping the vocals.
Additionally, do make use of the claps in the layering to induce those 3 note jacks (e.g. 87.055 to 87.232).

93.232 to 94.644
16ths only make sense to the continuous stream, so either remove them or include in every 16th gap.

97.467 to 120.055
Your approach here is generally ok but, besides what I mentioned about dumping (which is fine to ignore a bit given how heavy the section is), I need to point out two things:
-Rework various ghost jumps (e.g. 97.732, 98.085...) and missing jumps (e.g. 102.055, 102.232, 102.761...);
-98.702 to 99.585 and repetitions don't really warrant these jacks or even all those jumps. Particularly bad when you consider that all the other jacks are more or less justifiable.

120.055 to end
Repetition of a section I already covered.

And for a last remark, regardless of what I said in my review, the main motif of the chart (i.e. section starting on 24.055, repetitions and variations) is pretty nice and fits in my pack.
Because of this, I'll ask you to make sure that:
-It's ~feeling~ is not lost after making changes;
-The rest of the chart doesn't steal the spotlight either by excessive difficulty or density.

And pls fill the metadata in the .sm properly.