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- “See you in a week!” I say to Rin as I see her off on her flight.
- See you in a week…
- See you in a week…
- Those words echoed in my head throughout the night. Rin would be going on a trip to the United States for a few days, and it is unlikely that I would be able to contact her during her stay there. A week without Rin? It’s difficult to imagine, me and Rin have been best friends for as long as I can remember. Ever since we met, we haven’t spent more than a day away from each other. The thoughts of not being able to see Rin for a week leaves a worrying feeling that I can’t quite shake. Regardless of that though, I still have school at Otonokizaka High tomorrow, and that means I’ll get to see the rest of µ's. Hopefully they can take my mind off of Rin’s absence.
- The next couple of days went better than I expected. Classes were a welcome distraction, though our teachers still asked me to help Rin catch up when she came back. It was something that I was more than happy to do, considering how much Rin does for me, helping her with schoolwork has always been the one thing I felt I could in return for her. Also, with no looming performances, and with only the eight of us being here, µ's practices were lighter than normal. With some of the toll taken off of our normally intense practices, the panting that came with exhaustion was replaced with laughter. It made me smile, seeing my friends in such a joyous, exuberant mood. Though the smile was bittersweet,it made me sad to know that Rin couldn’t be here with us.
- A couple more days went by, as they did however, the more impact Rin’s absence began to have on me. I-I was only worried about her of course. Despite her grades, Rin is actually smarter than she lets on. Though her carefree attitude sometime lands her into trouble, I’m not sure how well her personality meshes with the west, so I just hope she’s okay. Hope she’s doing better than I am. I haven’t been able to focus as well in class, something that hasn’t gone unnoticed by our teacher. Even during lightened µ's practice, I couldn’t get into it, and I was failing to keep pace with the others. It felt like when I first joined µ's. I was a bit slow dancing to the beat, and Rin was a bit fast. And Rin…
- But before I could lose the battle against my tears, I hear a voice call out to me.
- “Hanayo, what are you still doing here?” I look up from the ground to see Maki looking at me, I open my mouth for a reply, but no words come out. “You seemed pretty distracted today.” Her face said otherwise, but her voice held concern.
- “Uhm, I-it’s nothing,” I meekly say. I’d gotten over my shyness when I joined µ's, at least when I’m around the group, but my confidence had been waning, and the occasional stutter came back.
- An awkward silence hovers between us for a moment.
- “We’re walking home together, okay?” Maki eventually says, walking off before hearing my response
- “Sure,” I say, talking more to myself, as I pack up my things quickly, not wanting to leave Maki waiting for too long.
- I see Maki waiting for me right outside of the school gates, she seems to be thinking hard about something.
- “It’s a beautiful day today, let's take a scenic route,” Maki says, turning to face me as I approach. I only nod, and at that signal, Maki promptly begins to walk off in the direction of Akihabara.
- As we walk through the streets of Akihabara, I notice that Maki seems to be going somewhere specific. She said we’d be taking a scenic route, I thought she meant that we’d be going into a few stores, and maybe picking up something to eat. Maki hasn’t stopped yet though, and right as I’m about to ask her where we’re going, a small little shop catches my eye. It was a small Ramen shop. Rin’s favorite one to be exact, we’d come over here so often that even the owner knew us by name. I didn’t know how long I’d been standing there, I might’ve just stood there for the rest of the day if Maki had not walked back over to me.
- “Looks like I was right, Hanayo” Maki says, as she also glares at the ramen shop.
- “W-what do you mean, Maki?”
- “I led you here on purpose, I’m sorry for not being completely honest with you, but to be fair, you weren’t being completely honest with me. Not only is there something bothering you, it’s Rin that’s bothering you. I never thought I’d be able to say that, considering how close you two are.” Maki says, while twirling her hair with her finger.
- “I’m sorry, I just didn’t want you to worry,” I say, my gaze slowly turning towards the ground.
- “Don’t worry about it,” Maki says while putting a hand on my shoulder. “Come on, let’s head inside and eat.”
- As we head inside, familiar sights and smells of the small eatery greet me. I feel a little bit better just by being in here. We make a little small talk after we order our food. Though as the conversation hits a lull, Maki’s face adapts a much more serious face.
- “Listen, Hanayo” Maki says, as she once again begins to twirl her hair with her finger again. “I can tell that Rin being away is bothering you, but I can also tell there’s something more. Rin will be back here in three days. If anything, you should look happier that she’s coming back soon. Regardless, I can be the first to tell you that I’m not really the most suited person for something like this, but I consider you and Rin both to be my closest friends, and it wouldn’t be right of me to just stand aside and watch you be sad. So please Hanayo, tell me about it.”
- Maki wasn’t always one for showing her emotion, but at this current moment, she looks almost as sad as I do. As I look down at the table, I notice our ramen is here, but right now, I wasn’t really hungry. A part of me just wants to run away, but..
- “Kayochin”
- My head shoots straight up at the sound of the nickname Rin uses for me, but a look of disappointment comes across my face as I realize it was Maki who called me that. I don’t know what it was but, Maki calling me that helped me gather my courage.
- “O-okay, I’ll tell you Maki.” I say, only loud enough for Maki to hear.
- “Thank you Hanayo, so please” Maki says, as she leans in a bit more.
- “You see Maki, Rin and I are pretty close. We’ve been best friends for as long as I can remember. To someone who doesn’t know us that well, it may seem like our relationship is very one-sided. While I can’t say whether that’s true or not, I can most definitely say that whenever Rin pulls me along to her antics, or whenever she pushes me into doing something, Rin will always take my feelings into account, and she will always have my best interests at heart. To tell you the truth Maki, I wouldn’t be where I am today without Rin. Being able to experience a piece of my dream, being able to experience being an idol. She’s always given me confidence when I’ve been afraid to do something. She gave me someone to talk to when I was too shy to approach anyone. We’ve spent so much time together, Rin has become such a big part of my life, and that’s why-”
- The tears are starting to flow freely from my eyes, and I barely notice Maki come over to my side of the table and give me a hug. After a few of minutes of us staying like that, I peel off from the hug, and continue.
- “And that’s why Maki,” I begin, “That’s why I’m scared of not having Rin around. I know it’s bad to have an overdependence on a person, but I just can’t help it. I struggle to think of where I’d be right now if it wasn’t for Rin, and we’re getting to that point where it’s time to follow our dreams, and my dreams and her dreams don’t exactly go hand in hand. So sometimes I get nervous, whenever I think about the future. Especially the possibility of a future where Rin isn’t by my side. I love her Maki, I really do.”
- “Hanayo,” Maki beings as soon as she’s sure I’m finished. “It took a lot of courage to tell me what you just did. Let me ask you something, you said that having Rin around gave you courage and confidence, right?” I nod. “So why does that courage all of a sudden go away when she’s not here anymore?”
- “I-I don’t know,” I respond, unable to meet Maki’s gaze anymore.
- “Let me tell you why it shouldn’t, Hanayo.” Maki cups my face, making my eyes meet hers. “Rin wanted you to be able to give you the confidence and the courage to be able to chase after what you want, with or without her. Rin wanted you to get over your shyness, so you could meet more people, make new friends. Just like me, and Eli, and Nico, and Honoka, and the rest of us in µ's. So now let me ask you, did you feel like you’d have trouble approaching anyone in our group for a simple, casual conversation?”
- “No, I guess not.” I reply, my eyes beginning to widen in realization.
- “Exactly. Just because there’s a time like now. Or times in the future, where Rin might not be around, doesn’t mean you have to forget the lessons in courage and confidence she’s taught you.”
- I look at Maki with the most genuine smile I’ve had since Rin left. “Maki, thank you.”
- “You can come to me anytime, Hanayo. Now come on, lets eat. We’ve spent way too much time talking” Maki adds with a light giggle.
- “But… our ramen is cold now, Maki.” I say.
- “Hanayo, has Rin ever eaten cold Ramen?” I shake my head. “Do you think she’d ever try to?”
- I chuckle and nod, Maki moves back over to her side of the table, and we begin eating. The cold ramen does nothing to cool the warmth in my chest.
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