Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny (2006)

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INDOXXI
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1
00:00:04,205 --> 00:00:05,967
- Ready, Kage?
- Ready.

2
00:00:06,007 --> 00:00:06,940
Let's do this.

3
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Fatty.

4
00:00:09,210 --> 00:00:11,144
Check. Uggh.

5
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Bean and cheese burrito.

6
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Bean and chee...

7
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Tenacious sound check initiated.

8
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Engage Kage!

9
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Pffhhh!

10
00:00:29,064 --> 00:00:30,861
Ha ha ha ha ha! High-five!

11
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Hnnh, Pfffhhhh!

12
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OK.

13
00:01:07,237 --> 00:01:08,761
Two, three...

14
00:01:19,851 --> 00:01:24,151
♪ A long-ass fucking time ago
in a town called Kickapoo ♪

15
00:01:24,189 --> 00:01:28,091
♪ There lived a humble family,
religious through and through ♪

16
00:01:28,126 --> 00:01:30,117
♪ But hey,
there was a black sheep ♪

17
00:01:30,161 --> 00:01:32,152
♪ And he knew just what to do ♪

18
00:01:32,197 --> 00:01:35,928
♪ His name was Young JB
and he refused to step in line ♪

19
00:01:35,968 --> 00:01:39,768
♪ A vision he did see of
fucking rocking all the time ♪

20
00:01:39,805 --> 00:01:44,265
♪ He wrote a tasty jam
and all the planets did align ♪

21
00:01:47,179 --> 00:01:48,942
♪ Oh, the dragon's balls
were blazing ♪

22
00:01:48,981 --> 00:01:50,506
♪ As I stepped into his cave ♪

23
00:01:50,549 --> 00:01:52,608
♪ Then I sliced
his fucking cockles ♪

24
00:01:52,651 --> 00:01:54,312
♪ With my long and shiny blade ♪

25
00:01:54,353 --> 00:01:55,786
♪ 'T was I who
fucked the dragon ♪

26
00:01:55,821 --> 00:01:57,584
♪ Fucka lye, sing, fucka loo ♪

27
00:01:57,623 --> 00:01:59,818
♪ And if you try
to fuck with me ♪

28
00:01:59,859 --> 00:02:04,091
♪ Then I shall fuck you too ♪

29
00:02:04,130 --> 00:02:06,360
♪ Gotta get it on
in the party zone ♪

30
00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:09,998
♪ I gots to shoot a load
in the party zone ♪

31
00:02:10,070 --> 00:02:12,300
♪ Gotta lick a toad
in the party zone ♪

32
00:02:14,174 --> 00:02:16,608
♪ Gotta suck a choad
in the party zone ♪

33
00:02:18,645 --> 00:02:20,306
Aaaah!

34
00:02:30,658 --> 00:02:33,855
♪ You disobeyed my orders, son,
Why were you ever born? ♪

35
00:02:33,895 --> 00:02:36,125
♪ Your brother's 10 times
better than you ♪

36
00:02:36,164 --> 00:02:37,995
♪ Jesus loves him more ♪

37
00:02:38,032 --> 00:02:39,624
♪ This music
that you've played for us ♪

38
00:02:39,667 --> 00:02:41,498
♪ Comes from
the depths of hell ♪

39
00:02:41,536 --> 00:02:43,231
♪ Rock & roll's
the Devil's work ♪

40
00:02:43,271 --> 00:02:45,364
♪ He wants you to rebel ♪

41
00:02:45,406 --> 00:02:47,067
♪ You'll become
a mindless puppet ♪

42
00:02:47,108 --> 00:02:48,973
♪ Beelzebub
will pull the strings ♪

43
00:02:49,010 --> 00:02:50,637
♪ Your heart
will lose direction ♪

44
00:02:50,678 --> 00:02:54,375
♪ And chaos it will bring ♪

45
00:02:54,415 --> 00:02:57,179
♪ You better shut your mouth,
you better watch your tone ♪

46
00:02:57,619 --> 00:03:01,350
♪ You're grounded for a week
with no telephone ♪

47
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:04,689
♪ Don't let me hear you cry,
don't let me hear you moan ♪

48
00:03:04,726 --> 00:03:08,093
♪ You gotta praise the Lord
when you're in my home ♪

49
00:03:12,802 --> 00:03:17,398
♪ Dio, can you hear me?
I am lost and so alone ♪

50
00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:19,499
♪ I'm asking for your guidance ♪

51
00:03:19,542 --> 00:03:22,170
♪ Won't you come down
from your throne? ♪

52
00:03:22,211 --> 00:03:27,046
♪ I need the tight compadre
who will teach me how to rock ♪

53
00:03:27,083 --> 00:03:31,952
♪ My father thinks you're evil,
but, man, he can suck a cock ♪

54
00:03:31,987 --> 00:03:36,947
♪ Rock is not the Devil's work,
it's magical and rad ♪

55
00:03:36,992 --> 00:03:44,421
♪ I'll never rock as long as
I am stuck here with my dad ♪

56
00:03:47,671 --> 00:03:49,502
♪ I hear you,
brave young Jables ♪

57
00:03:49,540 --> 00:03:50,974
♪ You are hungry for the rock ♪

58
00:03:51,008 --> 00:03:52,339
♪ But to learn
the ancient methods ♪

59
00:03:52,376 --> 00:03:53,968
♪ Secret doors you must unlock ♪

60
00:03:54,011 --> 00:03:55,672
♪ Escape your
father's clutches ♪

61
00:03:55,713 --> 00:03:57,908
♪ And this oppressive
neighborhood ♪

62
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♪ On a journey you must go
to find the land of Hollywood ♪

63
00:04:05,256 --> 00:04:08,020
♪ In the city of fallen angels ♪

64
00:04:08,059 --> 00:04:10,550
♪ Where the ocean
meets the sand ♪

65
00:04:10,595 --> 00:04:14,223
♪ You will form
a strong alliance ♪

66
00:04:14,264 --> 00:04:16,461
♪ And the world's
most awesome band ♪

67
00:04:16,501 --> 00:04:18,867
♪ To find your
fame and fortune ♪

68
00:04:18,903 --> 00:04:20,894
♪ Through the valley
you must walk ♪

69
00:04:20,939 --> 00:04:23,567
♪ You will face your inner demons ♪

70
00:04:23,608 --> 00:04:31,608
♪ Now go, my son, and rock! ♪

71
00:04:39,725 --> 00:04:41,659
♪ So he bailed
from fucking Kickapoo ♪

72
00:04:41,694 --> 00:04:43,286
♪ With hunger in his heart ♪

73
00:04:43,829 --> 00:04:46,458
♪ And he journeyed far and wide
to find the secrets of his art ♪

74
00:04:46,499 --> 00:04:50,333
♪ But in the end he knew that
he would find his counterpart ♪

75
00:04:50,370 --> 00:04:54,433
♪ Rock ♪

76
00:04:55,475 --> 00:05:01,438
♪ Ro-o-o-ck ♪

77
00:05:01,482 --> 00:05:02,245
♪ Ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-o ♪

78
00:05:02,284 --> 00:05:08,416
♪ Hey-yeah-hey-yeah-hey-yeah-
yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-hey-yeah ♪

79
00:05:08,456 --> 00:05:10,117
♪ Rock! ♪

80
00:05:50,365 --> 00:05:56,032
♪ Tenacious D, Tenacious D ♪

81
00:05:56,072 --> 00:05:59,633
♪ D, D, D, D ♪

82
00:05:59,675 --> 00:06:02,473
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

83
00:06:02,511 --> 00:06:04,638
♪ Tenacious ♪

84
00:06:31,709 --> 00:06:35,167
♪ Tenacious D, Tenacious D ♪

85
00:06:39,050 --> 00:06:42,486
♪ Tenacious D, Tenacious D ♪

86
00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:44,488
♪ Tenacious D ♪

87
00:06:44,522 --> 00:06:50,017
♪ Tenacious D,
Ten! Ten! Ten! Ten! ♪

88
00:06:50,061 --> 00:06:54,361
♪ Ten is ten, is ten,
is ten, is... ♪

89
00:06:59,038 --> 00:07:00,699
This place is awesome.

90
00:07:00,840 --> 00:07:03,637
Gold man. Ha ha ha!

91
00:07:23,263 --> 00:07:24,263
Whoa!

92
00:07:25,465 --> 00:07:28,365
Ohhh! Oh, man!

93
00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:31,528
- Thank you.
- Oh, my God.

94
00:07:31,570 --> 00:07:34,869
OK, that was
the best thing I have ever seen.

95
00:07:35,008 --> 00:07:37,499
- Who are you?
- The name's Kyle Gass.

96
00:07:37,544 --> 00:07:39,205
Kyle Gass.

97
00:07:39,245 --> 00:07:43,011
Dude, will you just teach me
that one thing that you did?

98
00:07:43,049 --> 00:07:45,641
Where you're like, playing...

99
00:07:45,684 --> 00:07:46,811
I'm not giving
free guitar lessons today.

100
00:07:46,853 --> 00:07:48,253
Why don't you stand over there?

101
00:07:49,289 --> 00:07:51,018
Right here?

102
00:07:51,057 --> 00:07:52,456
You're awesome.

103
00:07:52,492 --> 00:07:55,017
This next piece
is by Johann Sebastian Bach...

104
00:07:55,061 --> 00:07:56,494
- Watch this.
- And it's entitled...

105
00:07:56,529 --> 00:07:57,996
Bourrée in E Minor.

106
00:07:58,031 --> 00:08:00,431
Check this out,
this guy's insane.

107
00:08:06,841 --> 00:08:08,206
Man, are you guys stupid.

108
00:08:08,242 --> 00:08:11,439
Don't you know genius
when you see it?

109
00:08:11,479 --> 00:08:12,969
Damn!

110
00:08:15,450 --> 00:08:17,543
Anyway.

111
00:08:18,186 --> 00:08:19,685
My name's JB.

112
00:08:19,686 --> 00:08:19,744
My name's JB.

113
00:08:20,522 --> 00:08:21,887
Just rolled into town.

114
00:08:21,923 --> 00:08:24,153
- Would you give me some space?
- Yeah.

115
00:08:24,192 --> 00:08:25,523
You're kinda cramping my style.

116
00:08:25,560 --> 00:08:26,652
Oh, dude, I'm sorry.

117
00:08:26,695 --> 00:08:29,060
And you're driving
away my crowd.

118
00:08:29,096 --> 00:08:30,530
If you just move back,
like I asked you earlier...

119
00:08:30,565 --> 00:08:31,998
I think things
are going to be a lot better.

120
00:08:32,034 --> 00:08:33,968
- OK. Fine. Sorry.
- Thanks.

121
00:08:35,071 --> 00:08:36,538
♪ Can't you see he's the man? ♪

122
00:08:36,572 --> 00:08:38,437
♪ Let me hear you applaud ♪

123
00:08:38,474 --> 00:08:40,942
♪ He's more than a man,
he's a shining golden god! ♪

124
00:08:40,977 --> 00:08:42,001
♪ If you think ♪

125
00:08:42,045 --> 00:08:43,205
♪ It's time to fucking rock ♪

126
00:08:43,246 --> 00:08:45,339
♪ And fucking roll out of control ♪

127
00:08:45,381 --> 00:08:47,212
♪ Well, then you know
you've got to rock the block ♪

128
00:08:47,250 --> 00:08:49,411
♪ You fucking suck my fucking cock ♪

129
00:08:49,452 --> 00:08:51,647
♪ 'Cause when you rule,
you fucking school ♪

130
00:08:51,687 --> 00:08:53,314
♪ All of the fools
out of their jewels ♪

131
00:08:53,356 --> 00:08:55,586
♪ 'Cause if you think it's time to,
if you think it's time to ♪

132
00:08:55,625 --> 00:08:59,857
♪ If you think
it's time to fucking ro-ock ♪

133
00:08:59,896 --> 00:09:00,920
♪ He is going ♪

134
00:09:00,964 --> 00:09:02,659
♪ To kick your fucking ass ♪

135
00:09:02,799 --> 00:09:04,279
♪ And you know
his name is Kyle Gass ♪

136
00:09:04,768 --> 00:09:07,066
♪ Rocking and fucking rolling ♪

137
00:09:07,104 --> 00:09:10,301
♪ And fucking rocking
and fucking rolling ♪

138
00:09:10,340 --> 00:09:12,103
♪ And fucking
rip-rip-dip-diddley-diddley ♪

139
00:09:12,142 --> 00:09:13,666
♪ Rip-rip-dip-diddley-diddley
dip, dip ♪

140
00:09:13,710 --> 00:09:14,938
♪ Be-dop-bop-bop,
be-dop-bop-bop ♪

141
00:09:14,978 --> 00:09:16,969
♪ Be-dop-bop-bop,
be-dop-bop-bop-boo! ♪

142
00:09:17,014 --> 00:09:19,574
♪ Bip-bip-bip-biddle-biddle-boo,
bip-bip-bip-biddle-biddle-boo ♪

143
00:09:19,616 --> 00:09:22,312
♪ Boo, boo, boo,
boo, boo, boo! ♪

144
00:09:22,352 --> 00:09:23,980
♪ Bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-baah!
Bop-bop-bop-bop-bop ♪

145
00:09:24,022 --> 00:09:26,820
♪ Bip, bip, bip, bip,
bip, bip, bip, bip ♪

146
00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:29,918
♪ Bip, bip, bip, bip-be-doo! ♪

147
00:09:29,961 --> 00:09:31,622
Yeah!

148
00:09:31,663 --> 00:09:33,430
Dudes!

149
00:09:33,431 --> 00:09:35,296
That was bad-ass.

150
00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:38,769
You guys are like electric dynamite.

151
00:09:38,803 --> 00:09:40,100
What's the name of your band?

152
00:09:42,006 --> 00:09:46,443
We're not a band. They calls
me KG Solo Man Five Thousand...

153
00:09:47,479 --> 00:09:50,209
and I aims to keep it that way.

154
00:09:50,248 --> 00:09:52,614
- Aah!
- I'm outta here.

155
00:09:52,651 --> 00:09:54,846
This place is tapped.

156
00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:04,124
Jeez Louise, papa cheese.

157
00:10:04,163 --> 00:10:06,358
I know. It's OK.

158
00:10:06,667 --> 00:10:08,134
It's just part of his genius.

159
00:10:16,210 --> 00:10:21,375
♪ Well, I can't get
to sleep tonight ♪

160
00:10:22,916 --> 00:10:27,410
♪ No matter how hard I try ♪

161
00:10:29,390 --> 00:10:32,655
♪ 'Cause it's cold
and it's dark ♪

162
00:10:32,693 --> 00:10:37,027
♪ And the moon cannot light
the way ♪

163
00:10:38,565 --> 00:10:40,999
♪ And Daddy's gone ♪

164
00:10:43,037 --> 00:10:51,037
♪ I'm just a baby ♪

165
00:10:52,947 --> 00:10:57,040
♪ Aaah-hah-hah-hah ♪

166
00:11:08,330 --> 00:11:09,992
Well. What do we 'ave 'ere?

167
00:11:10,033 --> 00:11:12,024
My little snuggles.

168
00:11:12,069 --> 00:11:15,436
- Ha ha ha!
- I spy a stinking, filthy fag!

169
00:11:15,472 --> 00:11:20,168
Snivelling, boo-hoo-hoo!

170
00:11:20,208 --> 00:11:21,208
Like a wee baby!

171
00:11:21,410 --> 00:11:23,037
Ha ha ha!

172
00:11:23,078 --> 00:11:25,706
He does look like a fucking baby.

173
00:11:25,747 --> 00:11:28,183
Oh! Ha ha. Wee baby.

174
00:11:28,218 --> 00:11:31,187
Listen, fellas. I don't
wanna fight. So if you don't...

175
00:11:31,221 --> 00:11:32,555
Aaaah!

176
00:11:32,556 --> 00:11:35,252
Look at this. What is it?

177
00:11:35,292 --> 00:11:37,192
Needs a popping, my brother.

178
00:11:37,227 --> 00:11:38,455
- Ooh!
- Hey, no. Give me that back.

179
00:11:38,495 --> 00:11:39,689
That's my lucky guitar pick.

180
00:11:39,730 --> 00:11:41,789
That's my lucky guitar pick. Ow!

181
00:11:41,832 --> 00:11:44,357
Ah! Argh! Ow!

182
00:11:46,303 --> 00:11:47,930
Ha ha ha!

183
00:11:49,473 --> 00:11:52,101
Hey! Okay! Let's go!

184
00:11:55,445 --> 00:11:58,437
Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo! Ha ha ha!

185
00:11:58,482 --> 00:12:02,384
Heh heh heh! Ha ha ha!

186
00:12:09,160 --> 00:12:10,627
Ohh...

187
00:12:10,661 --> 00:12:12,492
That's right, run.

188
00:12:12,530 --> 00:12:15,090
Unless you want
some more of this! Aah!

189
00:12:17,702 --> 00:12:18,999
You saved me.

190
00:12:19,037 --> 00:12:21,597
Aah, that's all right.

191
00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:22,732
They had it coming.

192
00:12:23,942 --> 00:12:25,842
How can I repay you?

193
00:12:27,545 --> 00:12:28,671
We'll work something out.

194
00:12:48,901 --> 00:12:50,562
This place is futuristic.

195
00:12:50,737 --> 00:12:54,104
Yeah, this is my pad, here.
Number four.

196
00:12:54,141 --> 00:12:57,042
Not hard to remember.
Just think, "My door is four."

197
00:12:57,077 --> 00:12:59,307
Pretty cool.

198
00:13:00,714 --> 00:13:02,705
Wow. Nice pad.

199
00:13:02,749 --> 00:13:05,149
You got this place all to yourself?

200
00:13:05,185 --> 00:13:07,211
Yeah. I try to keep it simple.

201
00:13:07,255 --> 00:13:09,722
This is where I stay when I write.

202
00:13:09,756 --> 00:13:11,224
It's quite, uh, minimalist.

203
00:13:11,258 --> 00:13:14,659
I don't like anything to get in
the way of my creative juices.

204
00:13:14,695 --> 00:13:15,695
Cool.

205
00:13:15,729 --> 00:13:17,526
I'm working on my solo album
right now.

206
00:13:17,564 --> 00:13:19,259
Aaah.

207
00:13:19,300 --> 00:13:20,561
Yeah, Kyle Gass Project.

208
00:13:20,601 --> 00:13:23,061
It's got some pretty, uh,
breakthrough shit on it.

209
00:13:23,104 --> 00:13:25,538
Trying to keep it
on the hush-hush, though.

210
00:13:25,573 --> 00:13:28,701
Man, if you need a singer,
I am so there.

211
00:13:28,743 --> 00:13:29,743
Check it out.

212
00:13:29,777 --> 00:13:31,506
♪ Ride the tiger! ♪

213
00:13:31,546 --> 00:13:35,209
♪ You can see his stripes
but you know he's clean ♪

214
00:13:37,085 --> 00:13:38,643
It's a Ronnie James Dio song.

215
00:13:38,687 --> 00:13:40,178
Yeah. I know.

216
00:13:41,223 --> 00:13:42,384
I helped write it.

217
00:13:42,424 --> 00:13:43,952
I jam with him all the time.

218
00:13:44,692 --> 00:13:45,853
No way!

219
00:13:45,994 --> 00:13:48,485
- You do not know Dio!
- Sure.

220
00:13:48,500 --> 00:13:51,462
I know all the dudes
from Sabbath.

221
00:13:52,267 --> 00:13:53,393
- Dude?
- Mm?

222
00:13:55,671 --> 00:13:58,231
Is there any way that
maybe I could audition...

223
00:13:58,273 --> 00:13:59,934
to be in the Kyle Gass Project?

224
00:13:59,975 --> 00:14:02,205
Hm. Maybe.

225
00:14:02,244 --> 00:14:03,905
Oh ho ho ho!

226
00:14:03,946 --> 00:14:05,174
You gotta get your chops up,
though...

227
00:14:05,214 --> 00:14:07,614
if you wanna shred
with the big dogs, son.

228
00:14:07,649 --> 00:14:08,707
You got a lot to learn.

229
00:14:09,953 --> 00:14:11,545
Will you teach me your ways?

230
00:14:12,889 --> 00:14:15,050
I will teach you.

231
00:14:15,091 --> 00:14:17,787
Go ahead and sleep
on the power couch.

232
00:14:17,827 --> 00:14:19,419
Your training begins tomorrow.

233
00:14:19,462 --> 00:14:21,930
At the crack of noon!

234
00:14:23,133 --> 00:14:24,395
Um...

235
00:14:25,002 --> 00:14:26,433
♪ It could have been disaster ♪

236
00:14:26,470 --> 00:14:27,995
♪ Till the pupil found his master ♪

237
00:14:28,038 --> 00:14:29,403
♪ Something rhymes with master ♪

238
00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:31,431
♪ He's teaching
him in the ways of rock ♪

239
00:14:31,975 --> 00:14:33,466
Lesson number one.

240
00:14:33,511 --> 00:14:35,376
Power slide.

241
00:14:35,413 --> 00:14:39,645
♪ Aaaah ♪

242
00:14:41,519 --> 00:14:43,714
It's just slidin' on your knees.

243
00:14:43,754 --> 00:14:44,982
Is it?

244
00:14:45,022 --> 00:14:48,014
Or is it the single
most powerful stage move...

245
00:14:48,058 --> 00:14:49,719
in any rocker's arsenal?

246
00:14:50,695 --> 00:14:52,356
Oh.

247
00:14:53,064 --> 00:14:56,432
Gimme a power slide.
Full throttle.

248
00:14:57,135 --> 00:14:58,625
No fear.

249
00:14:58,670 --> 00:15:00,501
I'll give you a power slide.

250
00:15:04,042 --> 00:15:06,442
- How'd that feel?
- Really good.

251
00:15:06,478 --> 00:15:08,139
How did it look?

252
00:15:08,180 --> 00:15:09,647
Amazing...

253
00:15:09,681 --> 00:15:11,012
ly bad.

254
00:15:11,049 --> 00:15:13,950
♪ Doo-doo-doo-
mm-doodle-diddum-doo-doo ♪

255
00:15:13,985 --> 00:15:16,613
♪ I'm cleaning this apartment ♪

256
00:15:16,655 --> 00:15:19,351
♪ 'Cause it's gonna
help me, maybe ♪

257
00:15:19,391 --> 00:15:22,019
♪ Get into
the Kyle Gass Project ♪

258
00:15:22,060 --> 00:15:24,893
♪ Roodle-oodle-doo,
roodle-oodle doo ♪

259
00:15:24,930 --> 00:15:27,626
♪ Roodle-oodle-doo-doo-doo ♪

260
00:15:27,900 --> 00:15:29,765
Hey, what's this check
for 200 bucks?

261
00:15:29,802 --> 00:15:32,202
Oh, gimme that.

262
00:15:32,238 --> 00:15:33,899
That's a royalty check.

263
00:15:33,940 --> 00:15:35,908
Why's it say,
"I love you, pumpkin" on it?

264
00:15:35,942 --> 00:15:39,207
Well, um, it's the name
of a song.

265
00:15:39,245 --> 00:15:41,679
Big hit in Canada.

266
00:15:41,812 --> 00:15:43,473
Get back to work.

267
00:15:45,283 --> 00:15:47,342
Whoa, check out that superfox!

268
00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:52,045
Do you think you can
handle a woman like that?

269
00:15:52,089 --> 00:15:53,250
I think so.

270
00:15:53,291 --> 00:15:55,122
Well, you'd better know so...

271
00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:56,491
'cause there's gonna be
ten times hotter ones...

272
00:15:56,528 --> 00:15:58,257
backstage at the Kyle Gass Project.

273
00:15:58,296 --> 00:15:59,627
Really?

274
00:15:59,664 --> 00:16:02,531
Sex is a crucial component
to the Kyle Gass Project.

275
00:16:02,568 --> 00:16:04,160
Now drop
and give me one cock push-up.

276
00:16:04,937 --> 00:16:06,095
What's a cock push-up?

277
00:16:06,338 --> 00:16:07,506
What's a cock push-up?

278
00:16:08,540 --> 00:16:11,839
A cock push-up, my friend, is
where you lay on your stomach...

279
00:16:11,877 --> 00:16:14,845
and lift yourself off the ground
with nuthin' but your boner.

280
00:16:15,147 --> 00:16:16,147
No problem.

281
00:16:17,150 --> 00:16:19,209
The cock is a muscle.

282
00:16:19,252 --> 00:16:20,583
You gotta learn how to flex it.

283
00:16:20,620 --> 00:16:24,716
From now on, I want you to do
one cock push-up a day...

284
00:16:24,757 --> 00:16:26,088
every day.

285
00:16:26,125 --> 00:16:29,026
- It hurts my cock.
- Keep at it. You never know...

286
00:16:29,062 --> 00:16:31,556
when you'll need to fuck your way
out of a tight situation.

287
00:16:31,598 --> 00:16:32,392
Whoo!

288
00:16:32,432 --> 00:16:34,593
♪ Ding-ding-a-ding-
ding-a-ding-ding-ding ♪

289
00:16:34,634 --> 00:16:36,762
♪ His fingers move
with blinding speed ♪

290
00:16:36,804 --> 00:16:38,829
♪ Within my mind
he'll plant the seed ♪

291
00:16:38,873 --> 00:16:43,604
♪ I'm proud to be
amongst his learned flock ♪

292
00:16:43,643 --> 00:16:45,509
♪ He teaches me ♪

293
00:16:45,546 --> 00:16:48,242
♪ Beseeches me ♪

294
00:16:48,282 --> 00:16:51,080
♪ And when I've learned
all of his lessons ♪

295
00:16:51,118 --> 00:16:58,182
♪ Then I'll know the
ancient secrets of his rock ♪

296
00:16:59,660 --> 00:17:01,055
Aaah.

297
00:17:01,296 --> 00:17:02,061
Yeah.

298
00:17:02,098 --> 00:17:03,595
Oh oh oh, yeah!

299
00:17:03,633 --> 00:17:05,294
I fucking did it!

300
00:17:06,335 --> 00:17:07,860
Oh, I did it!

301
00:17:13,942 --> 00:17:15,773
Hey. Dude, you reached KG.

302
00:17:15,811 --> 00:17:17,540
You know what to do. Uhhh.

303
00:17:21,250 --> 00:17:23,548
Dude, pick up.

304
00:17:23,585 --> 00:17:26,053
Dude, it's Jables. Pick up, man.

305
00:17:26,088 --> 00:17:28,784
- Yeah.
- Yeah! Ha ha ha!

306
00:17:28,824 --> 00:17:30,587
I did it, man. Check it out.

307
00:17:30,626 --> 00:17:31,820
You hear that?

308
00:17:31,860 --> 00:17:33,350
The training is working, man.

309
00:17:33,395 --> 00:17:35,090
I made ten whole bucks
with my rock!

310
00:17:35,130 --> 00:17:37,064
Good. Go score me a dime bag.

311
00:17:37,099 --> 00:17:38,464
A what?

312
00:17:38,500 --> 00:17:40,331
Ten dollars' worth of weed.

313
00:17:40,369 --> 00:17:43,167
Now, listen.
Go down to Wake & Bake Pizza...

314
00:17:43,205 --> 00:17:44,502
Ask for Jojo.

315
00:17:44,540 --> 00:17:46,634
Tell him you want
the Bob Marley extra crispy.

316
00:17:46,677 --> 00:17:48,735
He'll know
what you're talking about.

317
00:17:48,778 --> 00:17:50,302
All right, dude. Roger that.

318
00:17:50,346 --> 00:17:52,007
One extra crispy coming up!

319
00:17:53,849 --> 00:17:57,080
Stone Age man
now had the muscle power...

320
00:17:57,119 --> 00:18:01,886
and mental power necessary
to evolve to new heights.

321
00:18:01,924 --> 00:18:04,392
He then found the means
to harness...

322
00:18:04,426 --> 00:18:07,224
an even greater energy source.

323
00:18:10,532 --> 00:18:13,433
The animals and creatures around him.

324
00:18:13,468 --> 00:18:14,468
Hmm.

325
00:18:14,503 --> 00:18:16,994
Animal power would give him the food...

326
00:18:17,039 --> 00:18:19,066
and transportation, the clothing
and entertainment...

327
00:18:19,109 --> 00:18:21,237
- needed for his long journey.
- Dude, turn it to Channel 14.

328
00:18:21,279 --> 00:18:23,213
In Search of Sasquatch is on.

329
00:18:27,018 --> 00:18:30,749
When you are able to snatch
this remote from my hand...

330
00:18:30,789 --> 00:18:33,383
you will be ready to choose
the channels we watch.

331
00:18:33,826 --> 00:18:35,223
Try to snatch it.

332
00:18:48,674 --> 00:18:50,073
Aah, fuck!

333
00:18:50,109 --> 00:18:53,510
Patience, young grass smoker.
Patience.

334
00:18:54,447 --> 00:18:56,244
Welcome to the gig simulator.

335
00:18:56,282 --> 00:18:59,718
If you pass this test,
your training is complete.

336
00:18:59,752 --> 00:19:03,586
You will be ready to audition
for the KGP.

337
00:19:03,623 --> 00:19:04,681
The what?

338
00:19:04,724 --> 00:19:06,248
Kyle Gass Project?

339
00:19:06,292 --> 00:19:07,520
Oh, right, right.

340
00:19:07,861 --> 00:19:08,350
Hold on.

341
00:19:08,395 --> 00:19:10,556
Aaah.

342
00:19:12,332 --> 00:19:14,800
Here's your 'za. That'll be 15.50.

343
00:19:14,835 --> 00:19:16,735
- Cool.
- Hey.

344
00:19:16,770 --> 00:19:19,330
Aren't you the guitar guy
from the boardwalk?

345
00:19:19,373 --> 00:19:21,568
- Yeah.
- I'm Lee.

346
00:19:21,608 --> 00:19:24,236
- Kage.
- Whoa!

347
00:19:24,278 --> 00:19:27,475
You guys puttin' on a concert?
Can I watch?

348
00:19:27,514 --> 00:19:29,505
- Half off the pie?
- Dealio.

349
00:19:30,884 --> 00:19:33,045
Right on. Come on in.

350
00:19:34,755 --> 00:19:36,552
Hu...

351
00:19:36,590 --> 00:19:41,927
Um... I don't know
if that's such a good idea, KG.

352
00:19:41,963 --> 00:19:45,261
Uh, I'd rather not do this
in front of strangers.

353
00:19:45,299 --> 00:19:46,288
What do you think
it's going to be like...

354
00:19:46,333 --> 00:19:47,857
when we play the Coliseum?

355
00:19:47,902 --> 00:19:49,028
No strangers allowed?

356
00:19:49,069 --> 00:19:50,264
OK.

357
00:19:50,305 --> 00:19:51,535
Let the simulation begin.

358
00:19:51,573 --> 00:19:53,404
Uh... Ha ha. All right.

359
00:19:54,343 --> 00:19:56,243
So, should I sing a song?

360
00:19:57,980 --> 00:19:59,914
Hey, sing something, douchebag!

361
00:20:02,184 --> 00:20:04,084
OK.

362
00:20:04,119 --> 00:20:06,747
You know what? I wanna start
off... offstage and come out...

363
00:20:06,789 --> 00:20:09,417
'cause that's the way
I like, imagine it.

364
00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:11,892
Just... just come
in from the wings.

365
00:20:11,927 --> 00:20:15,863
Ladies and gentlemen,
the Kyle Gass Project!

366
00:20:15,898 --> 00:20:17,456
Aaah!

367
00:20:19,035 --> 00:20:22,070
Hey, what's up? I'm JB
from the Kyle Gass Project.

368
00:20:22,438 --> 00:20:25,106
Get on with it, dumb shit.

369
00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:28,076
All right, Kage,
let's do it, man. Two, three.

370
00:20:28,110 --> 00:20:30,602
♪ The Kyle Gass a-Project
is a-out of control! ♪

371
00:20:30,647 --> 00:20:31,647
♪ All right! ♪

372
00:20:33,584 --> 00:20:35,679
Get off the stage,
you stupid dillweed.

373
00:20:40,124 --> 00:20:43,616
♪ He'd turn me to a diamond
from a piece of coal ♪

374
00:20:43,661 --> 00:20:45,652
♪ Yeah yeah yeah ♪

375
00:20:46,998 --> 00:20:47,529
Boo!

376
00:20:47,566 --> 00:20:48,835
Boo! Boo!

377
00:20:48,869 --> 00:20:50,396
Boooo!

378
00:20:50,437 --> 00:20:53,528
Go back to Kickapoo,
you fat-ass momma's boy!

379
00:20:53,573 --> 00:20:56,700
Boo!.. Boo! Boo!..Boooo!

380
00:20:56,742 --> 00:21:00,711
♪ You're teaching me
the secrets of the pumpkin patch ♪

381
00:21:00,745 --> 00:21:01,979
- Boo!
- Ow! Aah!

382
00:21:02,014 --> 00:21:03,375
- Boo!
- Urgh.

383
00:21:03,416 --> 00:21:05,543
Hey, that's really...

384
00:21:06,084 --> 00:21:11,715
- Hey! You suck!
- You suck! Suck! Suck!

385
00:21:11,756 --> 00:21:13,157
Jesus. You call that music?

386
00:21:13,192 --> 00:21:14,921
You're nothing but a mistake.

387
00:21:14,961 --> 00:21:16,861
I should have worn a condom.

388
00:21:16,896 --> 00:21:18,955
I was not a mistake.

389
00:21:18,998 --> 00:21:20,727
Power slide.

390
00:21:25,204 --> 00:21:27,672
Aaagh! Aaah, aaah!

391
00:21:27,707 --> 00:21:30,870
- He's had enough. Turn it off.
- Aagh. Aaaah!

392
00:21:30,910 --> 00:21:32,639
Lights!

393
00:21:32,678 --> 00:21:35,374
- Oooh.
- Hey, hey, it's OK.

394
00:21:35,415 --> 00:21:38,350
- I suck!
- You don't suck.

395
00:21:38,384 --> 00:21:40,215
I broke my guitar!

396
00:21:40,253 --> 00:21:41,413
Monster mash!

397
00:21:41,454 --> 00:21:44,423
Nobody passes the gig simulator
on the first time.

398
00:21:44,457 --> 00:21:46,857
Not even this guy.

399
00:21:46,893 --> 00:21:48,884
You didn't?

400
00:21:48,928 --> 00:21:51,055
But then you did pass it later?

401
00:21:51,097 --> 00:21:54,555
I passed later, but, you know,
took me a couple of tries.

402
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:56,967
- Oh, you did? I was doing...
- You know you can do it.

403
00:21:57,003 --> 00:21:58,334
- It was going pretty good.
- Right.

404
00:21:58,371 --> 00:22:00,362
Until I got... until I got to the...

405
00:22:00,407 --> 00:22:01,601
When I messed up on that thing.

406
00:22:01,641 --> 00:22:03,734
Let's clean this place up.
What do you say?

407
00:22:03,777 --> 00:22:06,644
And then we'll do bongloads
and play Maximum Overthruster.

408
00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:08,943
- Hey, dude, it's KG.
- Do some bongloads?

409
00:22:08,982 --> 00:22:11,550
You know what to do. Uhhh.

410
00:22:11,618 --> 00:22:13,110
Hi, pumpkin. It's your mother.

411
00:22:13,153 --> 00:22:15,053
Your father and I have decided...

412
00:22:15,089 --> 00:22:19,389
that 15 years of trying to be a famous
musician is long enough.

413
00:22:19,426 --> 00:22:21,087
So I'm sorry to say...

414
00:22:21,128 --> 00:22:22,823
we aren't going to be sending
you any more rent checks.

415
00:22:22,863 --> 00:22:24,262
It's time to get a real job.

416
00:22:24,298 --> 00:22:25,959
I love you, pumpki...

417
00:22:27,536 --> 00:22:30,403
"I love you, pumpkin"?

418
00:22:30,439 --> 00:22:32,737
Those weren't royalty checks.

419
00:22:33,976 --> 00:22:35,876
I can't believe this machine, it's...

420
00:22:35,911 --> 00:22:37,640
Let's watch TV, you wanna?

421
00:22:40,850 --> 00:22:42,613
You lied to me.

422
00:22:46,957 --> 00:22:48,788
- You don't know Dio.
- Hey!

423
00:22:48,825 --> 00:22:51,453
I think that In Search
of Sasquatch is on.

424
00:22:51,495 --> 00:22:53,622
- Hold on.
- Give me that fucking remote.

425
00:22:53,663 --> 00:22:55,961
No! Leave it!

426
00:22:55,999 --> 00:22:58,092
No!

427
00:22:58,135 --> 00:23:00,103
Aaah!

428
00:23:00,137 --> 00:23:01,729
- Ohhh!
- Aaah!

429
00:23:02,839 --> 00:23:05,205
Who are you?

430
00:23:06,576 --> 00:23:08,305
Here's your lunch, pumpkin.

431
00:23:08,345 --> 00:23:10,279
Thanks, Mom.

432
00:23:10,313 --> 00:23:12,440
Oh! Mwah!

433
00:23:12,482 --> 00:23:13,574
I love you, pumpkin.

434
00:23:22,826 --> 00:23:24,487
- Hey, pumpkin!
- Ha ha ha!

435
00:23:24,528 --> 00:23:26,689
Hah! What's with the hat, dude?

436
00:23:26,730 --> 00:23:28,527
Your mom sew that for you?
Ha ha ha!

437
00:23:29,533 --> 00:23:31,296
Ha ha ha!

438
00:23:31,334 --> 00:23:34,770
- Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!
- Oh, my God!

439
00:23:34,804 --> 00:23:36,931
Your mom shine that for you
when you go to bed?

440
00:23:36,973 --> 00:23:41,205
- Cue ball!
- Science experiment gone wrong!

441
00:23:41,244 --> 00:23:43,075
- Freakazoid!
- Ha ha ha!

442
00:23:43,481 --> 00:23:45,005
I'm fucking outta here.

443
00:23:51,990 --> 00:23:53,821
Don't walk away from me!

444
00:23:54,859 --> 00:23:57,554
I fucking cleaned your apartment, man.

445
00:23:58,930 --> 00:24:00,421
What are you doin'

446
00:24:00,965 --> 00:24:01,965
Why are you packing?

447
00:24:04,102 --> 00:24:05,729
I have to go back to my mom and dad's.

448
00:24:05,772 --> 00:24:07,036
I'm broke.

449
00:24:08,575 --> 00:24:11,167
I already spent the last rent check.

450
00:24:11,210 --> 00:24:12,508
Oh, you fucking dick!

451
00:24:12,545 --> 00:24:14,809
What'd you spend the money on? Huh?

452
00:24:14,847 --> 00:24:17,338
An official professor bullshit degree?

453
00:24:17,383 --> 00:24:19,442
What'd you spend the rent on?

454
00:24:28,361 --> 00:24:29,850
I got that for you.

455
00:25:25,254 --> 00:25:27,415
Stop packing, dude.

456
00:25:27,456 --> 00:25:29,289
We're gonna pay the rent...

457
00:25:29,326 --> 00:25:31,294
with our rock.

458
00:25:31,328 --> 00:25:33,922
- We are?
- Yeah.

459
00:25:33,964 --> 00:25:37,422
But we're not gonna be called
the Kyle Gass Project.

460
00:25:37,467 --> 00:25:39,128
From now on...

461
00:25:40,169 --> 00:25:42,430
we will be known as Tenac.

462
00:25:42,973 --> 00:25:44,241
Tenac?

463
00:25:44,775 --> 00:25:45,775
What's that?

464
00:25:46,476 --> 00:25:47,774
It's a sign.

465
00:25:48,812 --> 00:25:50,473
A legacy.

466
00:25:55,452 --> 00:25:58,250
I've had this birthmark since I was born.

467
00:25:58,256 --> 00:26:01,486
I looked it up in the dictionary.

468
00:26:01,826 --> 00:26:04,158
It's not in there.

469
00:26:04,195 --> 00:26:06,595
I never knew what the hell it meant.

470
00:26:06,631 --> 00:26:08,031
Till now.

471
00:26:10,067 --> 00:26:12,365
It's the name of our fuckin' band, dude.

472
00:26:13,570 --> 00:26:15,629
I have ass-mark too.

473
00:26:22,081 --> 00:26:23,673
You guys!

474
00:26:25,918 --> 00:26:27,317
Look!

475
00:26:33,659 --> 00:26:36,287
♪ Whoa! ♪

476
00:26:38,130 --> 00:26:41,156
♪ They must pay the rent ♪

477
00:26:42,167 --> 00:26:45,568
♪ With their rock ♪

478
00:26:45,604 --> 00:26:53,604
♪ Oh-ohhhh, oh, oh ♪

479
00:26:58,384 --> 00:27:02,218
But thaaaaat's my life.

480
00:27:05,524 --> 00:27:06,685
All right.

481
00:27:06,726 --> 00:27:10,025
Neil Hamburger,
everybody, Neil Hamburger.

482
00:27:10,063 --> 00:27:12,054
Funny stuff.

483
00:27:12,098 --> 00:27:14,862
Uh, the next band
asked me to read this.

484
00:27:14,901 --> 00:27:17,529
"Since the beginning of time..."

485
00:27:17,570 --> 00:27:21,870
"'twas written in the stones
that one day, a band would come."

486
00:27:21,908 --> 00:27:24,433
"Well, that band has come..."

487
00:27:24,477 --> 00:27:27,071
"and now they're here
to come again..."

488
00:27:27,113 --> 00:27:29,604
"in your ear-pussies."

489
00:27:30,950 --> 00:27:33,180
Ladies and gentlemen,
Tenacious D.

490
00:27:34,388 --> 00:27:36,583
That was awesome,
the way you read that.

491
00:27:36,624 --> 00:27:37,886
Kage. Kage?

492
00:27:37,925 --> 00:27:40,086
Don't forget
to fucking bring the thunder.

493
00:27:40,127 --> 00:27:41,227
- OK.
- Hey, what's up?

494
00:27:41,595 --> 00:27:43,688
We're Tenacious D
and this is our first concert ever...

495
00:27:43,731 --> 00:27:44,925
so it's kinda historical.

496
00:27:44,965 --> 00:27:47,991
And, um, we wrote this song that
gives you a little taste...

497
00:27:48,035 --> 00:27:49,297
of, like, the history of the band.

498
00:27:49,336 --> 00:27:50,598
Let's fucking do it, Kage, go!

499
00:27:50,638 --> 00:27:53,505
This is a song called
The History Of Tenacious D.

500
00:27:53,541 --> 00:27:54,530
And it's not just
a list of bullshit...

501
00:27:54,575 --> 00:27:55,633
that we've done in the past.

502
00:27:55,677 --> 00:27:57,574
It's a chronicling of our rise.

503
00:27:57,612 --> 00:27:58,740
To power!

504
00:27:58,780 --> 00:28:01,044
♪ We ride with kings
on mighty steeds ♪

505
00:28:01,082 --> 00:28:02,811
♪ Across the Devil's plain ♪

506
00:28:02,851 --> 00:28:04,581
♪ We've walked
with Jesus and his cross ♪

507
00:28:04,620 --> 00:28:06,383
♪ He did not die in vain ♪

508
00:28:06,422 --> 00:28:08,083
♪ No! ♪

509
00:28:11,327 --> 00:28:13,557
♪ We've run with wolves,
we've climbed K2 ♪

510
00:28:13,596 --> 00:28:15,757
♪ We even stopped a moving train ♪

511
00:28:15,798 --> 00:28:18,164
♪ We've traveled through
space and time, my friends ♪

512
00:28:18,201 --> 00:28:19,896
♪ To rock this house again ♪

513
00:28:19,936 --> 00:28:20,936
♪ Rock! ♪

514
00:28:23,941 --> 00:28:25,909
♪ We ride and we ride
we'll never subside ♪

515
00:28:25,943 --> 00:28:27,774
♪ We'll ride
till the planets collide ♪

516
00:28:27,811 --> 00:28:30,405
♪ And if you say that
we do not ride ♪

517
00:28:30,447 --> 00:28:32,608
♪ I'll tan your fucking hide ♪

518
00:28:32,649 --> 00:28:34,378
♪ Ride! ♪

519
00:28:37,354 --> 00:28:38,480
♪ Kyle's fingers be silver ♪

520
00:28:38,522 --> 00:28:39,819
♪ Jack's voice then be gold ♪

521
00:28:39,857 --> 00:28:41,984
♪ But lest you think we're vain ♪

522
00:28:42,025 --> 00:28:44,255
♪ We know you're all robots
and we don't care ♪

523
00:28:44,294 --> 00:28:45,261
♪ Tenacious D ♪

524
00:28:45,296 --> 00:28:47,161
♪ We reign! ♪

525
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:51,461
♪ We reign ♪

526
00:28:51,502 --> 00:28:53,629
♪ Supreme, oh God! ♪

527
00:28:53,671 --> 00:28:55,036
♪ Burrito supreme ♪

528
00:28:55,740 --> 00:28:57,765
♪ And a chicken supreme ♪

529
00:28:57,809 --> 00:29:00,471
♪ And a Cutlass Supreme ♪

530
00:29:00,512 --> 00:29:04,039
♪ Supreme, yeah ♪

531
00:29:04,082 --> 00:29:06,550
♪ Gonna count one, two, three ♪

532
00:29:06,584 --> 00:29:10,145
♪ Supreme, yeah ♪

533
00:29:10,388 --> 00:29:12,349
♪ Gonna count one, two, three ♪

534
00:29:12,557 --> 00:29:15,993
♪ Supre... ee... eme ♪

535
00:29:16,028 --> 00:29:17,792
♪ Gonna count one, two, three ♪

536
00:29:17,830 --> 00:29:20,025
♪ Burrito supreme ♪

537
00:29:20,065 --> 00:29:22,329
♪ And a chicken supreme ♪

538
00:29:22,367 --> 00:29:24,699
♪ And a Cutlass Supreme ♪

539
00:29:24,736 --> 00:29:26,727
♪ Supreme! ♪

540
00:29:27,040 --> 00:29:28,373
Yeah!

541
00:29:28,374 --> 00:29:30,001
Let's go!

542
00:29:30,043 --> 00:29:32,568
Ha ha ha!

543
00:29:32,612 --> 00:29:34,807
- Yeah!
- Yeah!

544
00:29:36,949 --> 00:29:38,246
You guys, wait for me outside.

545
00:29:38,284 --> 00:29:40,445
I'm gonna go talk to the big cheese.

546
00:29:40,486 --> 00:29:41,578
Good call.

547
00:29:43,623 --> 00:29:45,454
So?

548
00:29:45,491 --> 00:29:47,015
What'd you think?

549
00:29:47,060 --> 00:29:48,789
It was OK.

550
00:29:48,828 --> 00:29:50,227
- It was OK?
- Mm-hm.

551
00:29:50,263 --> 00:29:51,491
You were OK. We were kick-ass.

552
00:29:51,531 --> 00:29:53,761
And we're gonna totally win
that money next week...

553
00:29:53,800 --> 00:29:55,427
at the open mic contest.

554
00:29:55,468 --> 00:29:57,436
Well, good luck.

555
00:29:57,470 --> 00:29:59,904
You know there's a lot
of stiff competition, so...

556
00:29:59,939 --> 00:30:03,602
you might wanna think about
writing some new material.

557
00:30:06,413 --> 00:30:09,507
That was amazing. You guys
changed people's lives tonight.

558
00:30:09,549 --> 00:30:11,312
I know, we were so awesome.

559
00:30:11,351 --> 00:30:14,184
Yeah, it was awesome.
Compared to bullshit.

560
00:30:14,220 --> 00:30:15,244
But compared to the greats?

561
00:30:15,289 --> 00:30:19,623
To Zeppelin? To the Beatles?
To fucking Beethoven?

562
00:30:20,260 --> 00:30:22,125
True. We were kick-ass.

563
00:30:22,162 --> 00:30:24,687
But if the D's gonna
win that prize money...

564
00:30:24,731 --> 00:30:26,611
we're gonna have to write
a fucking masterpiece!

565
00:30:27,069 --> 00:30:28,229
Are you with me?

566
00:30:28,270 --> 00:30:29,737
Totally.

567
00:30:30,272 --> 00:30:31,272
Power hug.

568
00:30:41,718 --> 00:30:43,409
Masterpiece.

569
00:30:43,553 --> 00:30:46,779
♪ A masterpiece, a masterpiece ♪

570
00:30:46,823 --> 00:30:50,589
♪ They've got to write a masterpiece
to pay the rent ♪

571
00:30:51,694 --> 00:30:54,254
Do it!

572
00:30:54,297 --> 00:30:55,628
All right,
no more fucking around.

573
00:30:55,665 --> 00:30:57,895
Masterpiece is right in there.

574
00:30:57,934 --> 00:30:59,595
All we have to do is step
into that magic circle...

575
00:30:59,636 --> 00:31:01,001
and the masterpiece is ours.

576
00:31:01,037 --> 00:31:02,368
Are you ready?

577
00:31:02,405 --> 00:31:03,633
Are you ready
to write a fucking masterpiece?

578
00:31:03,673 --> 00:31:04,799
- 'Cause I sure the fuck am.
- Yeah!

579
00:31:04,841 --> 00:31:06,332
Let's go!

580
00:31:06,377 --> 00:31:07,776
What are you doing?
Go. Go. Play something.

581
00:31:07,811 --> 00:31:09,870
Go fast. The magic only lasts a second.

582
00:31:09,913 --> 00:31:11,744
No, don't play fast.
I said start fast.

583
00:31:11,782 --> 00:31:13,272
But keep going, yes.

584
00:31:13,317 --> 00:31:15,444
Try to make it prettier.
Prettier, prettier. Prettier.

585
00:31:15,486 --> 00:31:17,044
Stop judging yourself,
you're judging yourself.

586
00:31:17,087 --> 00:31:18,213
That's why that riff sucks.

587
00:31:18,255 --> 00:31:21,053
No fucking mental blocks.
Release the...

588
00:31:21,091 --> 00:31:22,490
♪ Chi ♪

589
00:31:22,526 --> 00:31:23,857
That's all right.

590
00:31:23,894 --> 00:31:25,327
Now, can you play a little
higher, higher, higher up?

591
00:31:25,362 --> 00:31:27,830
Higher notes, higher notes,
higher notes, higher notes.

592
00:31:27,865 --> 00:31:30,333
Higher notes, higher notes,
can you play any higher notes?

593
00:31:30,367 --> 00:31:31,595
Sorry, I didn't mean to yell.

594
00:31:31,635 --> 00:31:32,966
I'm not looking for anything specific...

595
00:31:33,003 --> 00:31:34,698
but that's definitely
the wrong part of the cosmos.

596
00:31:34,738 --> 00:31:37,138
I want it over here, in the
newer, hotter part. Like...

597
00:31:37,174 --> 00:31:39,734
♪ Molten lava! ♪

598
00:31:39,777 --> 00:31:42,211
♪ That's the thing,
keep playing that riff ♪

599
00:31:42,246 --> 00:31:45,613
♪ Because we gotta
get it on tonight, aah ♪

600
00:31:45,649 --> 00:31:47,173
What are you doing?
Were we recording?

601
00:31:47,217 --> 00:31:48,809
Press record. Press record.

602
00:31:48,852 --> 00:31:50,615
Oh, God damn it, it's too late!

603
00:31:50,654 --> 00:31:52,451
- Aah. Fu...
- God damn it, Kyle, we had it.

604
00:31:52,489 --> 00:31:55,219
We were right there in it
and you were too slow.

605
00:31:55,259 --> 00:31:57,955
You didn't remember to do shit,
you didn't do what I told you...

606
00:31:57,995 --> 00:32:00,930
and things got crossed,
chakras were fucking exploded.

607
00:32:00,964 --> 00:32:02,124
If we're gonna do this thing right...

608
00:32:02,166 --> 00:32:03,861
you gotta do what I tell you to do!

609
00:32:03,901 --> 00:32:06,063
Daaah! Fa-gaah!

610
00:32:06,171 --> 00:32:07,638
I wanna write a masterpiece.

611
00:32:08,173 --> 00:32:10,972
I know, dude. So do I.

612
00:32:13,546 --> 00:32:15,105
It's all right.

613
00:32:16,148 --> 00:32:19,413
We've got writers' block,
it happens to the best of 'em.

614
00:32:19,452 --> 00:32:21,079
I mean, look at these guys.

615
00:32:21,620 --> 00:32:24,145
AC/DC. Van Halen.

616
00:32:24,190 --> 00:32:25,851
The Who!

617
00:32:25,891 --> 00:32:27,587
Why are you guys so awesome?

618
00:32:27,627 --> 00:32:29,891
What do you have
that we don't have?

619
00:32:31,198 --> 00:32:33,098
Well, they all use
the same guitar pick.

620
00:32:33,468 --> 00:32:35,527
What?

621
00:32:42,543 --> 00:32:45,512
Looks like they all use
the same guitar pick.

622
00:32:47,548 --> 00:32:50,073
Holy shitballs.

623
00:33:00,795 --> 00:33:02,126
Too many picks.

624
00:33:02,163 --> 00:33:03,721
Let's see.

625
00:33:07,635 --> 00:33:08,966
I don't think they have it.

626
00:33:09,003 --> 00:33:11,233
Let's talk to the dude. We might
have to special order it.

627
00:33:11,272 --> 00:33:14,605
Marcus, I need a price check
on Ernie Ball amp caster stat.

628
00:33:14,642 --> 00:33:16,166
Just be a second.

629
00:33:16,210 --> 00:33:17,472
Can I help you gentlemen?

630
00:33:17,512 --> 00:33:20,606
Yeah, we're looking for
a guitar pick like this one.

631
00:33:26,421 --> 00:33:28,821
How'd you hear about this?

632
00:33:28,857 --> 00:33:30,290
What did Papardello tell you?

633
00:33:32,761 --> 00:33:36,219
Uh... Ahem. We just noticed
that all these musicians...

634
00:33:36,265 --> 00:33:37,754
are using the same guitar pick...

635
00:33:37,799 --> 00:33:39,288
Okay ka-ssh!

636
00:33:42,571 --> 00:33:47,474
Jerry, do me a favor, uh, ring up
these amp casters for me.

637
00:33:47,509 --> 00:33:49,170
Thank you, my man.

638
00:33:53,083 --> 00:33:54,083
In here.

639
00:34:02,492 --> 00:34:03,460
We can talk in here.

640
00:34:03,495 --> 00:34:05,793
What you seek...

641
00:34:05,831 --> 00:34:07,526
is the Pick...

642
00:34:09,267 --> 00:34:10,666
of Destiny.

643
00:34:12,404 --> 00:34:14,804
I think there's
a light switch back here.

644
00:34:14,840 --> 00:34:16,831
No, dude, you don't...

645
00:34:18,643 --> 00:34:20,702
Grab a seat.

646
00:34:20,745 --> 00:34:22,770
You two bozos
don't even realize it...

647
00:34:22,814 --> 00:34:24,145
but you just stumbled onto...

648
00:34:24,182 --> 00:34:26,047
the darkest secret
in the history of rock.

649
00:34:26,084 --> 00:34:28,018
Go on.

650
00:34:28,053 --> 00:34:30,453
I actually saw it once.

651
00:34:30,488 --> 00:34:32,149
I used to be a guitar tech.

652
00:34:32,190 --> 00:34:34,750
So one night, I'm working a gig
up in New Jersey or something.

653
00:34:34,793 --> 00:34:36,124
Some real mediocre band.

654
00:34:36,161 --> 00:34:38,391
Lead guitarist comes out,
starts shredding licks...

655
00:34:38,430 --> 00:34:40,295
way beyond his capabilities.

656
00:34:40,332 --> 00:34:42,197
Like shit that had to be
coming from somewhere else.

657
00:34:42,234 --> 00:34:44,225
I noticed he was using a new pick.

658
00:34:44,269 --> 00:34:46,931
Weird-looking thing with horns on it.

659
00:34:46,972 --> 00:34:49,873
Made of green ivory, or some shit.

660
00:34:49,908 --> 00:34:52,206
It was the pick, it wasn't him.

661
00:34:52,244 --> 00:34:53,575
He didn't know what he had, though.

662
00:34:53,612 --> 00:34:55,409
End of the show, he flicks it
back into the audience.

663
00:34:55,447 --> 00:34:58,143
Some kid catches it.

664
00:34:58,183 --> 00:34:58,946
Kid named Eddie.

665
00:34:58,985 --> 00:34:59,985
Eddie?

666
00:35:00,019 --> 00:35:01,577
Van Halen!

667
00:35:01,621 --> 00:35:03,282
Whoa.

668
00:35:03,322 --> 00:35:05,586
So I started researching it.

669
00:35:06,625 --> 00:35:08,584
Turns out this thing goes deeper
than I could have imagined.

670
00:35:08,629 --> 00:35:10,563
Way deeper.

671
00:35:11,331 --> 00:35:13,299
Back to the Dark Ages.

672
00:35:13,333 --> 00:35:15,665
I moved to Rome. Quit my job.

673
00:35:15,702 --> 00:35:17,169
Learned Latin.

674
00:35:17,204 --> 00:35:19,900
I gained the trust of the
night librarian at the Vatican.

675
00:35:19,940 --> 00:35:22,067
A gentleman named
Salvatore Papardello.

676
00:35:22,109 --> 00:35:24,236
He turned me on to some shit
that you wouldn't believe.

677
00:35:24,278 --> 00:35:26,303
Check this out.

678
00:35:26,346 --> 00:35:28,473
It's an ancient scroll.

679
00:35:28,515 --> 00:35:30,142
All in Latin.

680
00:35:30,183 --> 00:35:32,879
I translated it. Took me six years.

681
00:35:32,920 --> 00:35:35,252
Why didn't you just get a translator?

682
00:35:35,289 --> 00:35:37,689
And let him read it too?

683
00:35:40,494 --> 00:35:42,826
Listen to this.

684
00:35:42,863 --> 00:35:46,128
Long ago, a dark wizard
used his black magic...

685
00:35:46,166 --> 00:35:47,531
to summon Satan himself.

686
00:35:47,602 --> 00:35:49,433
Satanus.

687
00:35:49,470 --> 00:35:51,233
That's Latin for Satan.

688
00:35:51,272 --> 00:35:53,172
A horrific battle ensued.

689
00:35:53,207 --> 00:35:55,903
But the great demon
was far too powerful.

690
00:35:55,944 --> 00:35:57,969
Snakes!

691
00:35:58,012 --> 00:36:00,572
Finish me, foul beast!

692
00:36:00,615 --> 00:36:03,379
Luckily, a blacksmith
heard the beast's roars.

693
00:36:03,418 --> 00:36:05,613
No!

694
00:36:06,487 --> 00:36:07,749
Ow!

695
00:36:07,789 --> 00:36:10,223
Fuck! You chipped my tooth.

696
00:36:10,258 --> 00:36:10,657
I'm not complete.

697
00:36:10,693 --> 00:36:13,958
Venisti remanebis
donec denuo completus sis.

698
00:36:13,996 --> 00:36:15,463
What does that mean?

699
00:36:15,497 --> 00:36:18,933
From whence you came
you shall remain...

700
00:36:20,569 --> 00:36:22,298
until you are complete again.

701
00:36:23,205 --> 00:36:24,695
Fuck you! No!

702
00:36:24,740 --> 00:36:27,732
No! I'm not complete!

703
00:36:27,776 --> 00:36:30,006
The demon was drawn back
into the fires of hell...

704
00:36:30,045 --> 00:36:33,947
and the dark wizard
was totally stoked to be alive.

705
00:36:33,983 --> 00:36:36,213
With a long draw on his hash pipe...

706
00:36:36,251 --> 00:36:39,277
the wizard devised a way
to repay the blacksmith.

707
00:36:39,321 --> 00:36:41,551
The blacksmith loved a fair maiden.

708
00:36:41,590 --> 00:36:44,855
To gain her affection, he would
need a true master skill...

709
00:36:44,893 --> 00:36:47,487
that would leave the maiden
moist and wanting.

710
00:36:47,529 --> 00:36:50,760
And so the wizard fashioned
the demon's tooth...

711
00:36:50,799 --> 00:36:53,700
into a pick that would make
the blacksmith play...

712
00:36:53,736 --> 00:36:56,262
only the most masterful
of melodies on his lute...

713
00:36:56,307 --> 00:37:00,373
thereby winning the heart
of the maiden he loved.

714
00:37:01,679 --> 00:37:04,807
The secret of the pick died
with that blacksmith.

715
00:37:04,849 --> 00:37:05,680
And then... poof!

716
00:37:05,717 --> 00:37:08,948
All of a sudden it reappears
in the American South...

717
00:37:08,987 --> 00:37:11,555
at the turn of the century,
in Robert Johnson's fingers.

718
00:37:11,589 --> 00:37:13,501
Spawns the birth of the blues.
And rock & roll.

719
00:37:13,525 --> 00:37:14,617
Of course.

720
00:37:14,659 --> 00:37:16,354
The pick is a tiny part
of the beast...

721
00:37:16,395 --> 00:37:18,693
so it has
supranatural qualities.

722
00:37:19,231 --> 00:37:22,496
- Supernatural?
- No, supra-natural.

723
00:37:22,534 --> 00:37:25,992
That's like
a whole other level above super.

724
00:37:26,038 --> 00:37:27,665
Where is it now?

725
00:37:27,974 --> 00:37:29,637
That's the last known photo
of the pick.

726
00:37:31,677 --> 00:37:34,042
That guitar was sold at auction.

727
00:37:34,079 --> 00:37:36,310
It now resides in the
Rock & Roll History Museum.

728
00:37:37,650 --> 00:37:39,641
That's where the POD is too.

729
00:37:39,685 --> 00:37:42,245
- The POD?
- The Pick of Destiny.

730
00:37:42,289 --> 00:37:43,722
Oh.

731
00:37:43,757 --> 00:37:45,987
Why didn't you just go get it?

732
00:37:46,026 --> 00:37:49,052
The Rock & Roll History Museum
is an impenetrable fortress.

733
00:37:49,095 --> 00:37:53,589
You two bozos wanna steal
the Pick of Destiny...

734
00:37:53,633 --> 00:37:54,930
count me out.

735
00:37:54,968 --> 00:37:57,061
I already went down
that rabbit hole once.

736
00:37:57,103 --> 00:37:59,196
And I got news for you.

737
00:37:59,239 --> 00:38:01,537
There's no cheese at
the end of that tunnel, buddy.

738
00:38:02,876 --> 00:38:05,106
All right, get outta here.
I told you enough already.

739
00:38:05,145 --> 00:38:07,010
C'mon, get outta here.

740
00:38:07,047 --> 00:38:09,038
Man, I don't know what to say.

741
00:38:09,082 --> 00:38:10,777
Shh.

742
00:38:10,817 --> 00:38:12,842
Just get outta my store.

743
00:38:15,089 --> 00:38:16,750
The Quest!

744
00:38:23,832 --> 00:38:26,357
Oh, my God! You guys!
What are you doin' here?

745
00:38:26,401 --> 00:38:27,926
- Come on in!
- Actually, we can't stay.

746
00:38:27,970 --> 00:38:30,369
We were hopin'
you'd do us a favor.

747
00:38:30,404 --> 00:38:31,634
Anything you need, man.

748
00:38:31,673 --> 00:38:34,301
- Do you think it would be OK...
- We need your car.

749
00:38:34,343 --> 00:38:36,368
Oh.

750
00:38:36,411 --> 00:38:39,039
Um, well,
kinda need it for work.

751
00:38:39,081 --> 00:38:40,378
Listen, man.

752
00:38:40,416 --> 00:38:43,714
We've got a meeting
with the hugest president...

753
00:38:43,752 --> 00:38:46,380
of the most massive
record company in the business.

754
00:38:46,421 --> 00:38:48,553
We need to meet him
in Sacramento tonight.

755
00:38:48,590 --> 00:38:49,755
Oh.

756
00:38:49,792 --> 00:38:51,489
Uh...

757
00:38:51,527 --> 00:38:53,256
Well...

758
00:38:53,495 --> 00:38:54,557
All right.

759
00:38:54,597 --> 00:38:55,121
Hey, what's up with this pedal?

760
00:38:55,165 --> 00:38:56,598
That's my extra brake.

761
00:38:56,633 --> 00:38:59,329
I'm a pizza delivery guy
and a driving instructor.

762
00:38:59,369 --> 00:39:02,202
I teach people how to drive
while I deliver 'zas.

763
00:39:02,239 --> 00:39:04,230
Ha ha ha! Good thinkin', man.

764
00:39:04,975 --> 00:39:06,272
Later.

765
00:39:11,348 --> 00:39:14,112
Knock 'em dead
at the meeting, you guys.

766
00:39:17,220 --> 00:39:19,484
I can't stop thinkin'
about that fuckin' pick.

767
00:39:19,523 --> 00:39:22,151
You heard the guy. It's Satan's tooth.

768
00:39:22,192 --> 00:39:23,682
When we get that thing...

769
00:39:23,727 --> 00:39:25,285
we're gonna win
that fuckin' prize money...

770
00:39:25,328 --> 00:39:28,263
then we're gonna
dominate the world of rock.

771
00:39:28,766 --> 00:39:31,564
We're gonna be unstoppable, man.

772
00:39:31,602 --> 00:39:34,298
Hmmm...

773
00:39:34,338 --> 00:39:36,363
Unstoppable.

774
00:39:36,407 --> 00:39:40,138
Unstoppable.

775
00:39:40,177 --> 00:39:41,804
Unstoppable.

776
00:39:41,846 --> 00:39:45,111
This, uh, next band
asked me not to read this...

777
00:39:45,149 --> 00:39:50,177
but, God damn it,
I'm going to read it anyway...

778
00:39:50,221 --> 00:39:52,848
because I wrote it...

779
00:39:52,889 --> 00:39:55,153
and it's the truth.

780
00:39:55,192 --> 00:39:57,025
"I fucking love this band!"

781
00:39:57,162 --> 00:40:00,859
They are the best band ever, period!

782
00:40:00,899 --> 00:40:06,997
Ladies and gentlemen, Tenacious D!

783
00:40:11,244 --> 00:40:12,404
Hey, what's up?

784
00:40:12,446 --> 00:40:16,405
Me and KG wrote this song
five minutes ago.

785
00:40:16,450 --> 00:40:18,247
It's called Master Exploder.

786
00:40:34,234 --> 00:40:42,234
♪ Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh
ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh ♪

787
00:40:43,944 --> 00:40:51,612
♪ Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh yeah! ♪

788
00:40:53,353 --> 00:40:55,979
- ♪ I do not need ♪
- ♪ He does not need ♪

789
00:40:56,023 --> 00:40:59,290
- ♪ A microphone ♪
- ♪ A microphone ♪

790
00:40:59,326 --> 00:41:01,260
- ♪ My voice is fucking ♪
- ♪ Fucking ♪

791
00:41:01,295 --> 00:41:03,525
♪ Powerful ♪

792
00:41:05,066 --> 00:41:12,599
♪ Ahh, yeah! ♪

793
00:41:22,251 --> 00:41:30,251
♪ Ah, ahh, yeah! ♪

794
00:41:32,162 --> 00:41:33,162
Sorry.

795
00:41:34,831 --> 00:41:38,130
- ♪ I did not mean ♪
- ♪ He did not mean ♪

796
00:41:38,131 --> 00:41:41,604
- ♪ To blow your mind ♪
- ♪ To blow your mind ♪

797
00:41:41,638 --> 00:41:49,638
♪ But that shit happens to me
all the ti-i-i-ime ♪

798
00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:12,494
- ♪ Now, take a look ♪
- ♪ Take a look ♪

799
00:42:12,536 --> 00:42:15,528
- ♪ Tell me what you see ♪
- ♪ What you see ♪

800
00:42:15,573 --> 00:42:23,573
♪ We got the Pick of Destiny... y... y ♪

801
00:42:24,481 --> 00:42:31,786
♪ Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh
ahh-ahh yeah! ♪

802
00:42:34,660 --> 00:42:37,457
Woah!

803
00:42:40,332 --> 00:42:46,032
JB! JB! JB! JB!

804
00:42:46,071 --> 00:42:50,270
JB! JB! JB! JB! JB!

805
00:42:50,309 --> 00:42:52,210
- JB! JB! JB!
- JB. JB. JB.

806
00:42:52,211 --> 00:42:54,304
- JB! JB! JB!
- JB. JB. JB.

807
00:42:54,347 --> 00:42:56,645
JB, wake up. JB, wake up!

808
00:42:58,718 --> 00:43:00,685
Let's chow down, dude.

809
00:43:00,720 --> 00:43:02,483
- I'm starving.
- OK.

810
00:43:20,407 --> 00:43:21,999
You guys know what you want?

811
00:43:22,042 --> 00:43:24,442
Hmm.

812
00:43:24,478 --> 00:43:26,241
What do you recommend?

813
00:43:26,280 --> 00:43:28,180
I recommend
that you order some food.

814
00:43:28,849 --> 00:43:30,248
OK.

815
00:43:30,284 --> 00:43:35,950
Uh... Lemme have
the fried chicken and a steak...

816
00:43:36,824 --> 00:43:38,052
and the chicken-fried steak.

817
00:43:39,727 --> 00:43:41,160
Hello.

818
00:43:41,195 --> 00:43:43,720
Um... What happened to your eye?

819
00:43:45,099 --> 00:43:47,124
I burned it with a curling iron.

820
00:43:48,469 --> 00:43:51,199
I'll have one small glass
of carrot juice.

821
00:43:51,239 --> 00:43:52,467
Yeah, we don't have that here.

822
00:43:52,507 --> 00:43:53,770
Then I will have nothing.

823
00:43:53,809 --> 00:43:54,970
Great.

824
00:43:58,247 --> 00:44:00,408
- Dude, what's the matter?
- Dude?

825
00:44:00,450 --> 00:44:02,247
Aren't you hungry?
You should eat somethin'

826
00:44:02,285 --> 00:44:04,617
No. I never eat before a mission.

827
00:44:04,654 --> 00:44:06,121
It slows you down.

828
00:44:06,155 --> 00:44:08,180
I gotta be light on my feet
like a dancer.

829
00:44:08,224 --> 00:44:10,089
Like a fuckin' ninja, dude.

830
00:44:10,126 --> 00:44:11,126
Now check this out.

831
00:44:11,161 --> 00:44:12,958
I'm gonna jump this fence here.

832
00:44:12,996 --> 00:44:14,486
OK? Like a gazelle.

833
00:44:14,531 --> 00:44:16,999
Then you come around
that fuckin' bend.

834
00:44:17,033 --> 00:44:19,501
God! Damn it, Kyle!

835
00:44:19,536 --> 00:44:21,470
If we're gonna do this,
you gotta stay focused.

836
00:44:21,504 --> 00:44:23,301
Eye of le tigre!

837
00:44:23,340 --> 00:44:24,466
Now check it out.

838
00:44:24,507 --> 00:44:27,601
You give me a fuckin' boost,
He-Man style.

839
00:44:27,644 --> 00:44:30,078
And then we're gonna fuckin' do
a little mini-tiger roll...

840
00:44:30,113 --> 00:44:31,239
- And come on back.
- Oh, my God. Stop it!

841
00:44:31,281 --> 00:44:32,873
I fuckin' pull your shit up.

842
00:44:32,916 --> 00:44:35,282
Dude, hold on. That's good stuff.

843
00:44:40,523 --> 00:44:43,083
You're right, he's coming over here.

844
00:44:45,695 --> 00:44:47,856
- Oh!
- Fuckin' dick squeezer.

845
00:45:03,347 --> 00:45:05,178
Aaah!

846
00:45:09,821 --> 00:45:10,982
Uh...

847
00:45:17,963 --> 00:45:19,624
Hey...

848
00:45:20,932 --> 00:45:21,932
buddy.

849
00:45:22,968 --> 00:45:25,732
Heh heh heh.

850
00:45:25,771 --> 00:45:29,502
So, uh, what, uh, brings you...

851
00:45:29,541 --> 00:45:32,305
to this neck of the woods?

852
00:45:32,344 --> 00:45:35,142
Um... Ahem. We're just
on a little business trip.

853
00:45:35,180 --> 00:45:36,909
Mm.

854
00:45:36,948 --> 00:45:39,416
Are you, uh, going to, uh...

855
00:45:39,451 --> 00:45:42,511
check out
the Rock & Roll History Museum?

856
00:45:42,554 --> 00:45:45,182
- The Rock & Roll what?
- History Museum.

857
00:45:45,223 --> 00:45:46,588
Oh, no. I don't even know
what you're talkin' about.

858
00:45:46,625 --> 00:45:49,584
You just seem like
Rock & Roll types to me.

859
00:45:49,629 --> 00:45:51,153
- Ha ha!
- Yeah, well, we're not.

860
00:45:51,197 --> 00:45:53,131
We're just
two fuckin' businessmen...

861
00:45:53,166 --> 00:45:54,724
on our way
to see some shit in Sacramento.

862
00:45:54,767 --> 00:45:57,065
- So, sorry.
- Hmm. Yes. Yes.

863
00:45:57,103 --> 00:45:59,697
I was just asking because...

864
00:45:59,739 --> 00:46:03,175
I noticed the guitars
in the back seat of your car.

865
00:46:03,209 --> 00:46:05,609
Yeah, well, I said,
we're fuckin' businessmen.

866
00:46:05,645 --> 00:46:07,545
We sell guitars. So what?
Big deal. End of story.

867
00:46:07,580 --> 00:46:08,842
Check, please!

868
00:46:08,881 --> 00:46:10,109
You're sure you aren't planning...

869
00:46:10,149 --> 00:46:12,947
on breaking into
the Rock & Roll History Museum?

870
00:46:12,985 --> 00:46:15,044
Hey, gimme that back, man!

871
00:46:16,457 --> 00:46:18,186
Yeah, my buddy and I are in a band.

872
00:46:18,225 --> 00:46:20,489
I don't like to say the name,
but uh, we had some hits...

873
00:46:20,528 --> 00:46:22,859
And so, uh, they're inductin' us...

874
00:46:22,897 --> 00:46:24,865
into the Rock & Roll History Museum.

875
00:46:24,899 --> 00:46:26,730
- No way!
- Aaah.

876
00:46:26,768 --> 00:46:28,133
Way.

877
00:46:28,169 --> 00:46:30,228
Oh, my God. We're sitting
with someone famous?

878
00:46:30,271 --> 00:46:31,738
Ah, we're just regular guys.

879
00:46:31,773 --> 00:46:35,709
I mean, uh,
we're just flesh and... bone.

880
00:46:48,090 --> 00:46:50,786
Let's just say you are planning...

881
00:46:50,826 --> 00:46:53,488
on breaking into
the Rock & Roll History Museum.

882
00:46:54,630 --> 00:46:56,461
Maybe you are inexperienced...

883
00:46:56,499 --> 00:47:00,560
and you get inside
and cry like little girl.

884
00:47:00,603 --> 00:47:04,232
Maybe you don't have
what it takes to get the job done.

885
00:47:08,177 --> 00:47:10,077
'Scuse me.

886
00:47:12,047 --> 00:47:13,912
Man, God!

887
00:47:19,755 --> 00:47:22,280
Yeah. Damn.

888
00:47:34,539 --> 00:47:41,638
I was thinking maybe there
was something in that museum...

889
00:47:41,679 --> 00:47:43,806
you had a desire for.

890
00:47:44,049 --> 00:47:46,984
Maybe...

891
00:47:47,019 --> 00:47:48,646
Pick of Destiny!

892
00:47:53,926 --> 00:47:56,157
Our sorority is throwing
a huge bash tonight.

893
00:47:56,196 --> 00:47:57,789
You guys should totally come...

894
00:47:57,831 --> 00:47:59,889
and play some
of your songs at the party.

895
00:47:59,933 --> 00:48:03,197
We're just getting ready
to head over there right now.

896
00:48:03,235 --> 00:48:05,135
Why don't you follow us over?

897
00:48:05,170 --> 00:48:06,967
You know what?

898
00:48:07,005 --> 00:48:08,233
That sounds rad.

899
00:48:08,273 --> 00:48:11,332
We don't usually play private parties...

900
00:48:11,375 --> 00:48:14,141
but I think we can make
some dreams come true tonight.

901
00:48:14,180 --> 00:48:15,477
Hee hee hee hee!

902
00:48:15,515 --> 00:48:16,982
I'll ride along with you.

903
00:48:17,016 --> 00:48:18,745
So you don't get lost.

904
00:48:20,753 --> 00:48:23,814
I tried to get
the Pick of Destiny once.

905
00:48:23,857 --> 00:48:27,122
I had it in my hands, too.

906
00:48:27,160 --> 00:48:30,561
But I was caught. Set off a laser.

907
00:48:30,597 --> 00:48:33,657
Security door came down on my leg.

908
00:48:33,700 --> 00:48:35,759
- Cut it right off.
- Ooh.

909
00:48:35,802 --> 00:48:39,761
I would break in again
if I still had my leg.

910
00:48:42,275 --> 00:48:45,267
My leg. Oh, man.

911
00:48:45,312 --> 00:48:49,442
I miss that sweet-ass leg of mine.

912
00:48:49,483 --> 00:48:51,849
Why are you telling me this?

913
00:48:54,921 --> 00:48:59,551
I like you. I see the spark
in your eye that I once had.

914
00:48:59,593 --> 00:49:01,527
Let me show you something.

915
00:49:03,230 --> 00:49:06,461
These are my plans.
They will help you, I promise.

916
00:49:06,500 --> 00:49:08,798
There are two air ducts on the roof.

917
00:49:08,836 --> 00:49:11,531
You must enter through there.

918
00:49:11,572 --> 00:49:13,301
Speak of this to no one!

919
00:49:13,441 --> 00:49:14,602
Wait.

920
00:49:14,643 --> 00:49:16,304
Wait, I have some questions.

921
00:49:16,345 --> 00:49:17,176
Let me wipe.

922
00:49:17,213 --> 00:49:18,771
Hold up, dude.

923
00:49:24,953 --> 00:49:27,786
Dude. I got some smokin' bettys
over there...

924
00:49:27,823 --> 00:49:29,120
and they want us to play a gig.

925
00:49:29,658 --> 00:49:32,252
No. I just had the weirdest
conversation of my life.

926
00:49:32,294 --> 00:49:34,228
This guy just gave me
the perfect plan.

927
00:49:34,263 --> 00:49:35,787
Now, look.

928
00:49:36,331 --> 00:49:39,267
There's two air ducts on the roof.

929
00:49:39,536 --> 00:49:41,834
Dude. The party?

930
00:49:41,871 --> 00:49:43,566
Gettin' to play our own tunes?

931
00:49:43,606 --> 00:49:46,975
That blonde over there wants
to ride my wrinklestick, yo.

932
00:49:48,011 --> 00:49:49,639
Would you get your head out of
the fuckin' pussy-clouds, man?

933
00:49:49,680 --> 00:49:51,341
Who cares about these chicks?

934
00:49:51,382 --> 00:49:53,475
There's gonna be ten times
hotter babes backstage...

935
00:49:53,517 --> 00:49:56,417
when we win album of the year.

936
00:49:56,452 --> 00:49:58,920
This pick is our ticket to genius.

937
00:49:58,955 --> 00:50:02,323
Dude. I can't believe you'd
pass by a gig opportunity...

938
00:50:02,359 --> 00:50:03,986
with some sweet-ass hotties...

939
00:50:04,027 --> 00:50:05,619
What, for this?

940
00:50:05,662 --> 00:50:08,028
Is this really
that important to you? Huh?

941
00:50:08,064 --> 00:50:10,589
We can still write a masterpiece
and win that dough.

942
00:50:10,633 --> 00:50:12,260
Maybe it would be better for the D...

943
00:50:12,302 --> 00:50:14,327
if we worked on our songwriting...

944
00:50:14,370 --> 00:50:16,065
instead of relying on
ancient bullshit, but...

945
00:50:16,106 --> 00:50:17,664
probably won't work anyway.

946
00:50:17,676 --> 00:50:19,371
What's it gonna be, Kyle?

947
00:50:19,411 --> 00:50:21,174
You have to decide.

948
00:50:22,013 --> 00:50:25,210
Tits or destiny?

949
00:50:28,420 --> 00:50:29,420
Tits.

950
00:50:37,830 --> 00:50:39,320
So, good luck, buddy.

951
00:50:39,365 --> 00:50:41,356
I hope it was worth it,
because we're done.

952
00:50:41,400 --> 00:50:42,799
You ruined it. Pick's mine.

953
00:50:42,835 --> 00:50:44,735
Fuck you. I don't fuckin' need you.

954
00:50:44,770 --> 00:50:47,170
Later, cock-ass!

955
00:50:51,644 --> 00:50:53,771
Uh, don't mind him. He...

956
00:50:53,813 --> 00:50:55,337
He's my butler.

957
00:50:55,381 --> 00:50:57,144
Had to let him go for loafin'

958
00:50:57,183 --> 00:50:58,582
He... he'll... he'll be fine.

959
00:50:58,618 --> 00:51:02,349
Excuse me, um, are you gonna
charge us for all the refills?

960
00:51:02,388 --> 00:51:04,856
No, you're so pretty,
you get everything for free.

961
00:51:09,429 --> 00:51:11,021
Well, that's a really good deal.

962
00:51:11,765 --> 00:51:18,193
♪ Ohhh, ahhh, whoa, why? ♪

963
00:51:18,238 --> 00:51:19,262
♪ Woo! ♪

964
00:51:19,306 --> 00:51:21,069
It's just a five-mile walk.

965
00:51:21,108 --> 00:51:23,770
I can walk that.
I don't need a car.

966
00:51:23,810 --> 00:51:25,937
I'll take the fuckin' shoelace express.

967
00:51:25,979 --> 00:51:27,412
Aaaah!

968
00:51:27,447 --> 00:51:29,779
- Woo!
- Fuck you!

969
00:51:36,156 --> 00:51:38,954
♪ I want you, Jyne ♪

970
00:51:38,992 --> 00:51:40,425
♪ All the time ♪

971
00:51:40,460 --> 00:51:41,859
♪ I want you, Jyne ♪

972
00:51:42,763 --> 00:51:46,061
- Where we goin'
- ♪ I want you, Jyne ♪

973
00:51:46,099 --> 00:51:49,796
♪ Gonna make you mine ♪

974
00:51:49,836 --> 00:51:50,599
♪ Tonight ♪

975
00:51:50,638 --> 00:51:52,573
Stop. Stop the music.

976
00:51:52,607 --> 00:51:56,805
Everybody, we have got
a special surprise tonight.

977
00:51:56,845 --> 00:51:59,007
We have brought with us someone...

978
00:51:59,048 --> 00:52:02,074
who just happens to be a rock star!

979
00:52:03,119 --> 00:52:05,713
That's in town to be conducted...

980
00:52:05,755 --> 00:52:09,486
into the Rock & Roll History Museum.

981
00:52:09,526 --> 00:52:11,289
- Whoo!
- Yeah!

982
00:52:11,328 --> 00:52:15,128
And he promised to come here tonight...

983
00:52:15,165 --> 00:52:18,066
and play us a few of his hits.

984
00:52:18,101 --> 00:52:19,728
- Oh...
- So...

985
00:52:19,769 --> 00:52:21,600
- You know...
- Let's give it up!

986
00:52:21,638 --> 00:52:23,936
- Whoo!
- I don't have a guitar.

987
00:52:23,974 --> 00:52:26,101
I don't have my gui...
I don't have a guitar.

988
00:52:26,142 --> 00:52:28,042
- All right!
- Whoo!

989
00:52:28,078 --> 00:52:30,478
- All right, come on!
- Um...

990
00:52:32,182 --> 00:52:34,776
This is a song, um...

991
00:52:34,818 --> 00:52:36,308
I wrote with my partner.

992
00:52:37,087 --> 00:52:39,021
My f... former partner.

993
00:52:39,055 --> 00:52:41,751
And, uh, it's called
The History Of Tenacious D.

994
00:52:41,791 --> 00:52:43,782
- Whoo!
- Whoo!

995
00:52:43,827 --> 00:52:46,421
- Nice!
- Yeah!

996
00:52:52,102 --> 00:52:54,468
♪ Across the Devil's plain ♪

997
00:52:54,505 --> 00:52:55,706
Huh?

998
00:52:55,707 --> 00:52:58,198
♪ He did not die in vain, no ♪

999
00:52:58,743 --> 00:52:59,904
- That sucked.
- Yeah.

1000
00:52:59,944 --> 00:53:03,208
♪ I want you, Jyne ♪

1001
00:53:03,247 --> 00:53:04,442
- ♪ Need it all the time ♪
- Ha ha ha!

1002
00:53:04,482 --> 00:53:06,643
- That sucked.
- ♪ I want you, Jyne ♪

1003
00:53:06,684 --> 00:53:08,084
♪ Oh, girl, you're so divine ♪

1004
00:53:08,120 --> 00:53:10,485
♪ I want you, Jyne ♪

1005
00:53:14,393 --> 00:53:16,384
One more and that's it.

1006
00:53:20,399 --> 00:53:22,060
Aah.

1007
00:53:23,402 --> 00:53:25,042
It's a good thing
I found these mushrooms.

1008
00:53:25,070 --> 00:53:27,368
I was fucking starving.

1009
00:53:27,406 --> 00:53:30,136
Mmm. Mm.

1010
00:53:30,175 --> 00:53:31,836
Aah.

1011
00:53:34,813 --> 00:53:36,804
This place is kinda...

1012
00:53:40,252 --> 00:53:41,913
juicy.

1013
00:53:44,122 --> 00:53:47,853
Zzzzzhing!

1014
00:54:01,473 --> 00:54:03,304
Ha ha ha!

1015
00:54:09,716 --> 00:54:12,047
Hee hee!

1016
00:54:18,759 --> 00:54:20,660
Oh, my God! Sasquatch!

1017
00:54:21,196 --> 00:54:23,426
Aaaaah!

1018
00:54:23,465 --> 00:54:26,400
Jables! What's up?

1019
00:54:26,434 --> 00:54:27,799
Ho ho ho!

1020
00:54:27,836 --> 00:54:30,361
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1021
00:54:30,972 --> 00:54:33,566
What are you doin' out here?

1022
00:54:33,608 --> 00:54:36,008
I was just walkin'
in your beautiful forest.

1023
00:54:36,044 --> 00:54:39,275
Oh, it's not my fowest, bwother.

1024
00:54:39,314 --> 00:54:41,475
It's evewyone's.

1025
00:54:41,516 --> 00:54:43,108
You're so fuckin' awesome.

1026
00:54:43,151 --> 00:54:46,086
I love yoooou!

1027
00:54:46,121 --> 00:54:47,986
I love you too, JB.

1028
00:54:48,022 --> 00:54:50,422
You're a awesome rocker.
Ha ha ha!

1029
00:54:50,458 --> 00:54:51,551
Whoo!

1030
00:54:51,594 --> 00:54:54,085
- Let's play!
- Ha ha ha!

1031
00:54:54,130 --> 00:54:56,792
Aaaaah!

1032
00:54:56,832 --> 00:54:59,699
Aaaaah-oooh!

1033
00:54:59,735 --> 00:55:01,100
That's good.

1034
00:55:01,137 --> 00:55:03,367
- Let's go on a adventure.
- Yeah!

1035
00:55:03,405 --> 00:55:06,670
I got lots to show you.

1036
00:55:06,709 --> 00:55:08,939
Can I be a Sasquatch too?

1037
00:55:10,246 --> 00:55:12,737
You alweady are.

1038
00:55:12,781 --> 00:55:15,215
You're my son, JB.

1039
00:55:15,251 --> 00:55:17,481
My widdle baby Sass.

1040
00:55:17,520 --> 00:55:19,579
♪ La-la-lai-la ♪

1041
00:55:19,622 --> 00:55:21,920
♪ La, la, la-la-la-la-la-la ♪

1042
00:55:21,957 --> 00:55:22,981
Oh!

1043
00:55:23,025 --> 00:55:25,619
Let's take a dip
in the stwawberry wiver!

1044
00:55:25,661 --> 00:55:27,424
- Yay!
- Come on!

1045
00:55:27,463 --> 00:55:28,463
Oooh!

1046
00:55:28,497 --> 00:55:30,158
♪ Let's go ♪

1047
00:55:32,768 --> 00:55:36,534
Ohhhh! Yeah. This is fun.

1048
00:55:37,573 --> 00:55:39,564
Ohhhhh!

1049
00:55:39,608 --> 00:55:42,203
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

1050
00:55:42,245 --> 00:55:43,440
Good times.

1051
00:55:43,481 --> 00:55:44,778
- This is fun.
- Good times.

1052
00:55:45,315 --> 00:55:47,340
This is... This is super fun!

1053
00:55:51,989 --> 00:55:53,388
Ha ha ha!

1054
00:55:53,424 --> 00:55:55,415
Ohhh!

1055
00:55:55,459 --> 00:55:57,324
Ha ha! Daddy, look. Look.

1056
00:55:57,361 --> 00:55:57,726
It's stuck to my butt.

1057
00:55:57,763 --> 00:56:00,255
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1058
00:56:00,300 --> 00:56:02,393
Shake your tushie, it'll fall off.

1059
00:56:02,435 --> 00:56:04,596
- Aah!
- Oh!

1060
00:56:04,637 --> 00:56:05,969
Let's get rid of these.

1061
00:56:08,075 --> 00:56:10,009
- Ah!
- ♪ Ooh, la-la-la, ooh ♪

1062
00:56:10,044 --> 00:56:12,672
- Time to fly.
- Yeah.

1063
00:56:12,713 --> 00:56:16,876
- Whee.
- Ha ha ha! Whee!

1064
00:56:16,916 --> 00:56:18,750
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

1065
00:56:18,787 --> 00:56:20,852
- Hee hee! Hee hee hee!
- We're flying!

1066
00:56:20,853 --> 00:56:24,619
- Hee hee! Hee hee hee!
- We're flying!

1067
00:56:24,657 --> 00:56:27,091
- We're flying!
- Hold on, boy!

1068
00:56:27,126 --> 00:56:29,253
♪ Found where the Sasquatch hide ♪

1069
00:56:29,295 --> 00:56:31,263
♪ In the misty mountainside ♪

1070
00:56:31,297 --> 00:56:35,325
♪ He's got shiny diamonds
that he's got to protect ♪

1071
00:56:35,368 --> 00:56:37,666
♪ Look into the Sasquatch eye ♪

1072
00:56:37,704 --> 00:56:39,535
♪ Then you know
that Sass can fly ♪

1073
00:56:39,573 --> 00:56:43,874
♪ Sasquatch is my daddy
and he's going to protect me! ♪

1074
00:56:43,911 --> 00:56:45,674
♪ Half man and half machine ♪

1075
00:56:45,713 --> 00:56:47,738
♪ On the cover of a magazine ♪

1076
00:56:47,781 --> 00:56:51,945
♪ Bigfoot is my father
and he's got to protect me! ♪

1077
00:56:51,986 --> 00:56:54,186
♪ These lyrics don't make sense ♪

1078
00:56:54,221 --> 00:56:55,548
♪ Think I've found the evidence ♪

1079
00:56:55,590 --> 00:56:59,617
♪ That yeti is my papa
and he wants to protect... ♪

1080
00:56:59,660 --> 00:57:01,321
♪ Me! ♪

1081
00:57:02,630 --> 00:57:05,360
Do you know where
I can find the Pick of Destiny?

1082
00:57:05,399 --> 00:57:08,766
Sure! It's right over there!

1083
00:57:08,803 --> 00:57:10,395
Oh! Let's get it!

1084
00:57:10,438 --> 00:57:13,601
I can get it if I surf on your...

1085
00:57:13,641 --> 00:57:16,303
Aaah! Aaah! Aaah!

1086
00:57:17,012 --> 00:57:19,446
Aaaaah! Sweet baby!

1087
00:57:19,581 --> 00:57:23,984
Oh! Aaaah! Aaaah! Aaaah! Aaaah!

1088
00:57:24,019 --> 00:57:25,486
Ow!

1089
00:57:27,523 --> 00:57:29,047
Oh, God!

1090
00:57:30,292 --> 00:57:32,192
Hoo hoo hoo hoo!

1091
00:57:32,227 --> 00:57:34,422
Oh! Oh, God.

1092
00:57:36,800 --> 00:57:38,290
Oh, God.

1093
00:57:38,334 --> 00:57:40,495
Where the fuck am I?

1094
00:57:43,406 --> 00:57:44,930
Yeah, you motherfucker.

1095
00:57:44,974 --> 00:57:46,168
I'm gonna get that son...

1096
00:58:01,358 --> 00:58:04,122
♪ Dude, I totally miss you ♪

1097
00:58:04,161 --> 00:58:06,561
♪ I really fuckin' miss you ♪

1098
00:58:06,597 --> 00:58:10,328
♪ I'm all alone all the time ♪

1099
00:58:10,367 --> 00:58:12,198
♪ All the time ♪

1100
00:58:12,236 --> 00:58:14,796
♪ Dude, I totally miss you ♪

1101
00:58:14,839 --> 00:58:17,069
♪ The things we did together ♪

1102
00:58:17,108 --> 00:58:22,045
♪ Where have you gone? ♪

1103
00:58:22,881 --> 00:58:26,408
♪ Totally miss the honesty
and special times ♪

1104
00:58:26,451 --> 00:58:32,048
♪ And honestly I totally miss
the fucked up thing you do ♪

1105
00:58:33,291 --> 00:58:36,749
♪ Dude, I totally miss you ♪

1106
00:58:36,795 --> 00:58:38,990
♪ I totally miss you ♪

1107
00:58:39,030 --> 00:58:43,797
♪ Dude, I totally miss you
all the time ♪

1108
00:58:45,237 --> 00:58:49,674
♪ Aaaah ♪

1109
00:58:51,076 --> 00:58:55,206
♪ Aaaah ♪

1110
00:58:58,016 --> 00:59:00,849
♪ Aaaah-aaaah-aaaah ♪

1111
00:59:00,886 --> 00:59:05,482
- ♪ Aaaah, I totally aaaah you ♪
- Ha ha ha!

1112
00:59:05,524 --> 00:59:06,923
Did you see that?

1113
00:59:06,959 --> 00:59:08,790
- That was awesome.
- ♪ Dude, I totally miss you ♪

1114
00:59:08,827 --> 00:59:10,989
- That was great.
- ♪ I totally miss you ♪

1115
00:59:11,030 --> 00:59:16,832
♪ Dude, I totally miss you
all the time ♪

1116
00:59:18,537 --> 00:59:23,167
♪ All the t-i-i-ime ♪

1117
00:59:32,654 --> 00:59:34,178
♪ The mission is clear ♪

1118
00:59:34,222 --> 00:59:35,553
♪ I'm goin' over there ♪

1119
00:59:35,590 --> 00:59:38,252
♪ I'm goin' to do the mission ♪

1120
00:59:38,293 --> 00:59:41,091
♪ I'm going to flip around the corner
flat as a pancake ♪

1121
00:59:41,129 --> 00:59:43,757
♪ And then l... Oh, no, the camera! ♪

1122
00:59:43,799 --> 00:59:46,267
♪ Stay back here, devise a plan ♪

1123
00:59:46,301 --> 00:59:49,964
♪ Dive into the bushes ♪

1124
00:59:50,005 --> 00:59:52,371
♪ Against all odds ♪

1125
00:59:52,407 --> 00:59:55,865
♪ Infiltrate, storm the gate! ♪

1126
00:59:56,912 --> 00:59:58,140
♪ Storm the gate! ♪

1127
00:59:58,180 --> 01:00:00,740
- ♪ Ninja style, Samurai ♪
- ♪ Storm the gate! ♪

1128
01:00:00,782 --> 01:00:03,842
- ♪ Metal pole, climb that shit ♪
- ♪ Storm the gate! ♪

1129
01:00:03,885 --> 01:00:06,251
♪ Climb into that motherfucker ♪

1130
01:00:06,288 --> 01:00:08,779
♪ Now I'm climbin' up, up on a roof ♪

1131
01:00:08,824 --> 01:00:12,260
♪ I've got catlike reflexes, flip... ♪

1132
01:00:12,294 --> 01:00:13,494
- Me, I elbow him...
- One guy?

1133
01:00:13,528 --> 01:00:14,517
He's tryin' to punch me in the neck.

1134
01:00:14,563 --> 01:00:16,292
- Yeah.
- I look down...

1135
01:00:16,331 --> 01:00:18,663
and there's two guys goin',
"I'm... We're gonna punch you."

1136
01:00:18,700 --> 01:00:20,167
So they're punchin' up at me...

1137
01:00:20,202 --> 01:00:22,363
I got both elbows down like this.

1138
01:00:22,404 --> 01:00:23,564
Pull both their hair...

1139
01:00:23,605 --> 01:00:25,436
and I made them both
poke each other's eyes out.

1140
01:00:25,474 --> 01:00:27,339
So they're both blind,
there's blood everywhere...

1141
01:00:27,375 --> 01:00:30,469
♪ Against all odds ♪

1142
01:00:30,512 --> 01:00:32,912
♪ Infiltrate, oh, storm the gate! ♪

1143
01:00:32,948 --> 01:00:34,939
What the fuck?

1144
01:00:35,786 --> 01:00:37,914
♪ Two air vents on the roof ♪

1145
01:00:37,956 --> 01:00:40,754
♪ That's what the guy was talkin' a...
shit! ♪

1146
01:00:41,292 --> 01:00:43,123
- Fuck!
- ♪ Electric eye ♪

1147
01:00:44,729 --> 01:00:48,130
♪ Infiltrate, storm the gate! ♪

1148
01:00:48,366 --> 01:00:49,628
♪ Storm the gate! ♪

1149
01:00:50,668 --> 01:00:54,399
♪ Storm the gate! ♪

1150
01:00:55,106 --> 01:00:55,868
Ow!

1151
01:00:55,907 --> 01:00:59,536
God damn it! Aah!

1152
01:00:59,577 --> 01:00:59,844
God! That was KG's fault.

1153
01:00:59,845 --> 01:01:02,039
God! That was KG's fault.

1154
01:01:02,080 --> 01:01:03,672
If he'd been here
like we planned...

1155
01:01:03,715 --> 01:01:04,841
he coulda lowered me down
with a rope...

1156
01:01:04,883 --> 01:01:06,612
but dick-ass
had to follow his cock.

1157
01:01:06,651 --> 01:01:10,417
And you know when I go quadruple
plat he'll come a-knockin'- -

1158
01:01:10,455 --> 01:01:13,515
"Dude, can I come back
and join the band now?"

1159
01:01:13,558 --> 01:01:15,822
And I'll be like,
"No way, cockshiner."

1160
01:01:15,861 --> 01:01:17,328
And then he'll be like...

1161
01:01:17,362 --> 01:01:18,386
Can you hear me?

1162
01:01:18,430 --> 01:01:20,660
Oh, yeah.
I hear you loud and clear.

1163
01:01:20,699 --> 01:01:22,291
You're sayin' ho's before bro's.

1164
01:01:22,334 --> 01:01:24,165
Well, that's not how I roll, asshole.

1165
01:01:24,202 --> 01:01:26,603
JB, it's KG. Do you read me?

1166
01:01:29,542 --> 01:01:31,942
What do you want, non-rocker?

1167
01:01:31,977 --> 01:01:34,036
This line is reserved for rockers only...

1168
01:01:34,079 --> 01:01:36,013
so I can't really talk
to you right now.

1169
01:01:36,048 --> 01:01:37,574
Sex, drugs, and then rock & roll.

1170
01:01:37,618 --> 01:01:40,086
In that order.
I was just followin' the code.

1171
01:01:40,120 --> 01:01:41,747
You're a fuckin' traitor.

1172
01:01:41,788 --> 01:01:43,551
You bailed on me,
and now I'm in the shit.

1173
01:01:43,590 --> 01:01:45,751
Where the fuck are you?

1174
01:01:47,894 --> 01:01:49,828
I'm in the air duct, dude.

1175
01:01:53,600 --> 01:01:59,061
- Dude. I totally missed you.
- Me too.

1176
01:02:11,419 --> 01:02:12,852
I just heard a noise.

1177
01:02:12,887 --> 01:02:15,412
I am trippin'

1178
01:02:15,456 --> 01:02:17,390
Are you stoned?

1179
01:02:17,425 --> 01:02:19,290
Listen.

1180
01:02:20,862 --> 01:02:23,422
Uh, I just heard a noise.

1181
01:02:23,465 --> 01:02:25,194
- I'm gonna go check it out.
- Copy that.

1182
01:02:25,233 --> 01:02:26,394
Mm.

1183
01:02:47,356 --> 01:02:48,356
Uh...

1184
01:02:51,661 --> 01:02:53,459
Classic Rock is clear.

1185
01:02:53,497 --> 01:02:54,897
I'm gonna go check out Punk.

1186
01:02:54,932 --> 01:02:56,866
And if I find anybody in there...

1187
01:02:56,900 --> 01:03:00,698
I'm gonna pop a fuckin' cap
in their ass.

1188
01:03:00,737 --> 01:03:02,932
I'm gonna call it self-defense.

1189
01:03:02,972 --> 01:03:04,133
Hello?

1190
01:03:05,842 --> 01:03:07,002
I'm on my own.

1191
01:03:17,554 --> 01:03:18,554
Oh, God.

1192
01:03:22,059 --> 01:03:23,287
Dude, you heard that guy.

1193
01:03:23,327 --> 01:03:24,885
He's gonna shoot us. Let's bail.

1194
01:03:24,928 --> 01:03:26,828
No. We're too close.

1195
01:03:26,864 --> 01:03:28,161
That pick is in one of these rooms...

1196
01:03:28,198 --> 01:03:29,527
and we're not leavin' here
without it.

1197
01:03:29,567 --> 01:03:31,025
Dude, look at this place.

1198
01:03:31,068 --> 01:03:33,366
It's huge. We're never
gonna find this thing.

1199
01:03:33,404 --> 01:03:36,430
Follow me. We are the shadows.

1200
01:03:36,474 --> 01:03:39,034
They'll never find what cannot be seen.

1201
01:04:18,251 --> 01:04:19,719
Center.

1202
01:04:23,523 --> 01:04:24,888
Picks, picks.

1203
01:04:24,924 --> 01:04:27,290
Where do they keep their fuckin' picks?

1204
01:04:27,327 --> 01:04:28,885
It's gotta be in the Guitar Gods room.

1205
01:04:28,928 --> 01:04:30,418
- Where's that?
- It's right here.

1206
01:04:30,463 --> 01:04:32,193
At the top of Guitarway to Heaven.

1207
01:05:11,674 --> 01:05:13,039
There it is.

1208
01:05:17,113 --> 01:05:20,207
Fuck-a-luck-a-ding-dong.

1209
01:05:20,249 --> 01:05:21,876
- Let's go get it.
- No!

1210
01:05:23,886 --> 01:05:25,578
Lasers.

1211
01:05:25,621 --> 01:05:27,489
They'll slice you to pieces.

1212
01:05:27,523 --> 01:05:29,422
Sizzlelean.

1213
01:05:30,159 --> 01:05:31,627
You stay here and keep a lookout.

1214
01:05:32,161 --> 01:05:34,096
Wh... What are you gonna do?

1215
01:05:34,131 --> 01:05:36,599
I'm goin' in there and gettin' that pick.

1216
01:05:40,103 --> 01:05:41,264
♪ Danger ♪

1217
01:05:43,007 --> 01:05:44,566
♪ Laser ♪

1218
01:05:46,377 --> 01:05:47,538
♪ Tetris ♪

1219
01:05:49,980 --> 01:05:51,311
♪ Impossible ♪

1220
01:05:51,348 --> 01:05:52,348
Be careful.

1221
01:05:52,617 --> 01:05:54,278
♪ Q-Bert ♪

1222
01:05:56,120 --> 01:05:57,451
♪ Frogger ♪

1223
01:05:58,022 --> 01:05:59,022
Uh! Uh!

1224
01:05:59,057 --> 01:06:01,753
♪ Dig Dug ♪

1225
01:06:01,793 --> 01:06:04,523
♪ Marble Madness ♪

1226
01:06:06,364 --> 01:06:07,695
♪ Centipede ♪

1227
01:06:07,732 --> 01:06:09,427
♪ Millipede ♪

1228
01:06:09,467 --> 01:06:10,798
♪ Tenacious ♪

1229
01:06:10,835 --> 01:06:11,961
You got it.

1230
01:06:13,137 --> 01:06:14,137
♪ Impossible ♪

1231
01:06:15,039 --> 01:06:16,097
♪ Impossible ♪

1232
01:06:18,543 --> 01:06:21,979
Can't... reach... pick.

1233
01:06:22,013 --> 01:06:24,277
Surrounded by lasers.

1234
01:06:24,315 --> 01:06:25,680
Focus, Jables.

1235
01:06:27,518 --> 01:06:30,043
Use all your mental powers.

1236
01:06:31,823 --> 01:06:34,155
Wait.
There's a button down here.

1237
01:06:35,827 --> 01:06:37,818
I think it might deactivate the lasers...

1238
01:06:38,730 --> 01:06:40,891
But I can't reach it.

1239
01:06:40,932 --> 01:06:42,365
The cock.

1240
01:06:43,168 --> 01:06:44,795
Use the cock.

1241
01:06:55,848 --> 01:06:58,009
Come on, helmet head.

1242
01:06:58,050 --> 01:07:00,744
Get it up.

1243
01:07:00,785 --> 01:07:02,343
♪ Cock ♪

1244
01:07:02,789 --> 01:07:03,814
Ooh.

1245
01:07:05,625 --> 01:07:08,458
♪ Cock, cock, cock ♪

1246
01:07:09,596 --> 01:07:11,393
♪ Cock, cock, cock ♪

1247
01:07:11,431 --> 01:07:13,228
Aaah! Mmm!

1248
01:07:13,266 --> 01:07:16,360
- ♪ Cock, cock, cock, cock ♪
- Come to Papa.

1249
01:07:16,403 --> 01:07:18,735
♪ Cock ♪ - Oh! Aaah!

1250
01:07:18,772 --> 01:07:20,433
Oh, yeah!

1251
01:07:31,585 --> 01:07:32,678
Let's finish this.

1252
01:07:38,793 --> 01:07:40,852
♪ Hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey, hey, hey ♪

1253
01:07:40,895 --> 01:07:43,125
♪ Prekeh-goo-goo-boo
ba-dum-biddly-beep-beep ♪

1254
01:07:43,799 --> 01:07:45,926
Aaah!

1255
01:07:45,967 --> 01:07:47,264
Fuck.

1256
01:07:47,302 --> 01:07:48,462
I can't reach it.

1257
01:07:48,503 --> 01:07:50,403
- I can't reach it.
- Hold on!

1258
01:07:51,506 --> 01:07:53,201
Aaaaah!

1259
01:07:54,176 --> 01:07:55,439
That's it, that's it.

1260
01:07:55,478 --> 01:07:57,036
I got it! I got it! Aaah!

1261
01:07:57,079 --> 01:07:58,546
- Aaah! Aaah!
- Aaah!

1262
01:08:02,418 --> 01:08:06,149
Ah! Aaah! Oh! Aaah!

1263
01:08:07,857 --> 01:08:09,256
- Uh...
- Oh!

1264
01:08:09,292 --> 01:08:12,318
Ha ha ha ha!

1265
01:08:12,929 --> 01:08:13,987
Aaaaaah!

1266
01:08:16,766 --> 01:08:18,393
Haul ass!

1267
01:08:22,104 --> 01:08:24,072
Aaaaaah!

1268
01:08:24,841 --> 01:08:26,502
Aaaaaah!

1269
01:08:30,847 --> 01:08:32,838
Halt! Stop!

1270
01:08:38,287 --> 01:08:39,287
- Stop!
- Aaah!

1271
01:08:42,693 --> 01:08:49,028
Power slide!

1272
01:08:51,501 --> 01:08:55,494
♪ Yeah! ♪

1273
01:09:03,982 --> 01:09:05,509
- Oh, damn!
- Ugh! Why?

1274
01:09:06,354 --> 01:09:09,015
- That was awesome.
- I know.

1275
01:09:09,055 --> 01:09:11,989
I've never fired a gun before,
it was unbelievable.

1276
01:09:14,024 --> 01:09:15,151
Aah! Oh, God! Oh!

1277
01:09:15,193 --> 01:09:16,193
Oh! Hold up!

1278
01:09:17,763 --> 01:09:19,492
- We got it!
- Fuck, yeah.

1279
01:09:19,532 --> 01:09:20,760
Let's get the fuck outta here.

1280
01:09:20,799 --> 01:09:24,326
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

1281
01:09:24,370 --> 01:09:26,338
Nice work, boys.

1282
01:09:26,372 --> 01:09:31,038
Now, toss that pick over here,
nice and slow.

1283
01:09:31,077 --> 01:09:34,513
Or I will cut you from hole to hole.

1284
01:09:35,048 --> 01:09:36,948
Then you might as well kill us, man...

1285
01:09:36,983 --> 01:09:38,473
'cause there is no way in hell...

1286
01:09:38,518 --> 01:09:40,917
we're givin' you this fuckin' pick.

1287
01:09:40,953 --> 01:09:41,978
OK.

1288
01:09:42,022 --> 01:09:44,252
So be it.

1289
01:09:44,291 --> 01:09:46,418
Come over here.

1290
01:09:46,459 --> 01:09:48,518
I'm going to fucking stab you.

1291
01:09:49,963 --> 01:09:51,523
What?

1292
01:09:52,566 --> 01:09:54,591
No. We're not comin' over there.

1293
01:09:54,634 --> 01:09:55,397
Fine.

1294
01:09:55,436 --> 01:09:57,904
Stay where you are, then.

1295
01:09:57,939 --> 01:09:59,668
I'm going to come over there.

1296
01:09:59,707 --> 01:10:04,610
I am going to slice out
your eyes and your balls.

1297
01:10:04,645 --> 01:10:08,547
And then I am going to stick
your eyes in your ballsacks...

1298
01:10:08,583 --> 01:10:10,107
and then I will take your balls...

1299
01:10:10,151 --> 01:10:12,676
and I will put them in your eyeholes!

1300
01:10:12,720 --> 01:10:14,347
Dude, we could totally outrun him.

1301
01:10:14,388 --> 01:10:15,946
Totally, let's bail.

1302
01:10:15,990 --> 01:10:18,925
N... No, wait! Co... Come back here!

1303
01:10:18,960 --> 01:10:20,052
Gaaah!

1304
01:10:20,094 --> 01:10:22,187
Come back with my pick!

1305
01:10:23,030 --> 01:10:24,463
It belongs to me!

1306
01:10:25,567 --> 01:10:27,400
Freeze!

1307
01:10:28,069 --> 01:10:30,197
Catch me if you can.

1308
01:10:33,575 --> 01:10:34,575
Aaah..shit!

1309
01:10:36,378 --> 01:10:38,710
♪ Kings! ♪

1310
01:10:39,648 --> 01:10:43,641
Yeah! Yeah!

1311
01:10:44,520 --> 01:10:46,750
Whoo!

1312
01:10:46,789 --> 01:10:48,314
Fifty miles to Los Angeles.

1313
01:10:48,358 --> 01:10:49,847
- We did it!
- Yeah!

1314
01:10:49,892 --> 01:10:51,018
- Yeah!
- I know.

1315
01:10:51,060 --> 01:10:52,221
I'm surprised no one even chased us.

1316
01:10:52,222 --> 01:10:54,059
We got away scot-free.

1317
01:10:54,097 --> 01:10:56,622
- You fuckin' rule.
- No. You fuckin' rule.

1318
01:10:56,666 --> 01:10:59,726
Yeah, but I couldn't have done it
without your training.

1319
01:10:59,769 --> 01:11:00,862
Dude, let's see the pick.

1320
01:11:00,904 --> 01:11:03,633
- Oh, shit.
- Dude, you got it, right?

1321
01:11:03,673 --> 01:11:05,573
Yes! Ha ha ha!

1322
01:11:05,608 --> 01:11:07,269
- Look at how awesome it is!
- Ohhhh!

1323
01:11:06,310 --> 01:11:07,834
- Now we have the power.
- Yes!

1324
01:11:07,878 --> 01:11:10,312
We shall carry on its ancient legacy.

1325
01:11:10,347 --> 01:11:13,077
Dude, we are gonna smoke
the competition...

1326
01:11:13,117 --> 01:11:14,345
at the open mic night tonight.

1327
01:11:14,385 --> 01:11:16,319
- That money is ours!
- Mm. Totally.

1328
01:11:19,256 --> 01:11:21,986
Yeah, I got some, uh, fellas
with a broken taillight.

1329
01:11:23,360 --> 01:11:24,622
- Oh, fuck. It's the cops.
- Is it? Oh... Oo.

1330
01:11:24,662 --> 01:11:26,323
Pull over. Pull over. It's cool.

1331
01:11:26,363 --> 01:11:27,421
- OK.
- Pull over.

1332
01:11:28,332 --> 01:11:30,095
All right. Just play it cool.

1333
01:11:30,134 --> 01:11:32,159
M'kay? They got nothin' on us.

1334
01:11:32,202 --> 01:11:34,693
Let's just be mellow, OK?

1335
01:11:37,574 --> 01:11:39,007
What're you doing? No!

1336
01:11:39,043 --> 01:11:40,034
What the fuck are you doing?

1337
01:11:40,078 --> 01:11:41,739
This is Officer Mackenzie,
I need backup.

1338
01:11:41,780 --> 01:11:43,510
Assailants turning south
down Lexington Avenue.

1339
01:11:43,549 --> 01:11:44,549
I'm in pursuit.

1340
01:11:45,083 --> 01:11:47,449
Oh, God damn it, Kyle!

1341
01:11:47,485 --> 01:11:49,180
♪ Car chase city,
that's the name of the game ♪

1342
01:11:49,220 --> 01:11:50,209
- I want out!
- ♪ It was all groovy ♪

1343
01:11:50,255 --> 01:11:51,483
♪ Now it's totally lame ♪

1344
01:11:51,523 --> 01:11:52,888
♪ KG really fuckin'
blew a synapse ♪

1345
01:11:52,925 --> 01:11:54,689
♪ Now we're fuckin' headed
for a total collapse ♪

1346
01:11:54,727 --> 01:11:56,367
♪ Car chase city,
run away from the fuzz ♪

1347
01:11:56,395 --> 01:11:58,556
♪ Thought that we wasn't
but we totally was ♪

1348
01:11:58,597 --> 01:12:00,292
♪ Car chase city,
now we're off-a the map ♪

1349
01:12:00,832 --> 01:12:02,959
♪ Car chase city,
now we're takin' a crap ♪

1350
01:12:03,001 --> 01:12:04,434
- ♪ Now it's gettin' hairy ♪
- Oh, fuck!

1351
01:12:04,469 --> 01:12:05,629
- ♪ So we're changin' the key ♪
- God damn it!

1352
01:12:05,670 --> 01:12:06,660
♪ Never underestimate
the power of D ♪

1353
01:12:06,705 --> 01:12:08,730
♪ KG fuckin' put his foot on the gas ♪

1354
01:12:08,774 --> 01:12:10,299
♪ If I go to prison,
hide the pick in my ass ♪

1355
01:12:10,342 --> 01:12:11,639
♪ Fuck this shit, it's gone too far ♪

1356
01:12:11,678 --> 01:12:13,839
♪ Kage, pull over,
let me out of the car ♪

1357
01:12:14,380 --> 01:12:16,507
The car is severely damaged.

1358
01:12:16,549 --> 01:12:19,847
The perpetrators appear to be
two heavyset males...

1359
01:12:19,885 --> 01:12:21,012
driving a blue Cutlass Supreme.

1360
01:12:21,054 --> 01:12:23,078
♪ Car chase city,
now we're takin' the lane ♪

1361
01:12:23,122 --> 01:12:25,056
♪ KG blew it now we're goin' insane ♪

1362
01:12:25,091 --> 01:12:27,492
♪ Let's rock, let's roll,
let me try to fill up your... ♪

1363
01:12:27,527 --> 01:12:29,428
Let's go now to Mark in Skycop...

1364
01:12:32,232 --> 01:12:33,563
God damn it!

1365
01:12:35,368 --> 01:12:38,201
- Yeah?
- Hey, you guys!

1366
01:12:38,238 --> 01:12:39,830
- Fuck!
- It's Lee.

1367
01:12:39,873 --> 01:12:41,569
I'm just checkin' in.
Is everything OK?

1368
01:12:41,609 --> 01:12:43,668
Yeah, we're cool. We're super cool.

1369
01:12:43,711 --> 01:12:46,042
Ah! Ahh!

1370
01:12:46,079 --> 01:12:47,047
Um, where are you guys?

1371
01:12:47,081 --> 01:12:48,480
We're, uh, we're at the drive-in.

1372
01:12:48,516 --> 01:12:50,642
We're watchin this bitchin' movie.

1373
01:12:50,684 --> 01:12:52,515
It's, uh, Cop Chase 3.
Have you seen it?

1374
01:12:52,552 --> 01:12:56,580
Aaaaaah!

1375
01:12:56,624 --> 01:12:59,184
Uh, no. I haven't seen that one.

1376
01:12:57,227 --> 01:12:59,195
Whoa!

1377
01:12:59,229 --> 01:13:01,526
Sounds scary, though.

1378
01:13:01,563 --> 01:13:04,588
Yeah. Uh, it's really fucking scary.

1379
01:13:04,632 --> 01:13:06,691
I'm shaking right now, I'm so scared.

1380
01:13:06,734 --> 01:13:09,100
Cool. Well, how was that, uh...

1381
01:13:09,137 --> 01:13:10,662
big power meeting you guys had?

1382
01:13:10,705 --> 01:13:12,900
Awesome. I'll tell you about it later.

1383
01:13:12,940 --> 01:13:14,220
You're makin' us miss the movie.

1384
01:13:15,845 --> 01:13:17,710
I think I lost em!

1385
01:13:22,284 --> 01:13:23,876
Gaah!

1386
01:13:23,919 --> 01:13:25,820
♪ Gas! Brakes! ♪

1387
01:13:27,357 --> 01:13:29,154
♪ Spinnin' donuts,
spinnin' donuts, go! ♪

1388
01:13:29,192 --> 01:13:30,716
I can do this.

1389
01:13:30,760 --> 01:13:31,760
♪ Flip flip! ♪

1390
01:13:32,829 --> 01:13:34,990
♪ Gas ♪ - Nooo!

1391
01:13:35,031 --> 01:13:37,329
♪ Nitro! ♪ - Go!

1392
01:13:37,367 --> 01:13:40,302
♪ Aaaaah! ♪

1393
01:13:55,819 --> 01:13:57,912
We're gonna need
paramedics and fire trucks.

1394
01:13:57,954 --> 01:13:59,945
These guys are toast.

1395
01:14:06,462 --> 01:14:08,123
Let's get the fuck outta here.

1396
01:14:08,165 --> 01:14:09,165
Let's go.

1397
01:14:09,567 --> 01:14:11,035
Uh, which way, which way?

1398
01:14:11,069 --> 01:14:12,161
OK, where?

1399
01:14:12,204 --> 01:14:13,204
That way! That way!

1400
01:14:17,208 --> 01:14:18,869
This is it, I think.

1401
01:14:18,910 --> 01:14:20,572
Uh! Oooh! Uh!

1402
01:14:22,112 --> 01:14:24,342
- Lemme sneak a peek.
- OK.

1403
01:14:26,618 --> 01:14:29,212
Uh! Huh.

1404
01:14:29,254 --> 01:14:30,254
- This is it.
- Oh.

1405
01:14:36,192 --> 01:14:37,682
C'mon.

1406
01:14:37,727 --> 01:14:39,024
Oh, fuck.

1407
01:14:39,062 --> 01:14:41,053
- Let's do this.
- OK.

1408
01:14:41,232 --> 01:14:42,359
Hey. Hey.

1409
01:14:42,400 --> 01:14:43,697
Hey, guys, you're runnin' a little late.

1410
01:14:43,735 --> 01:14:44,566
There's one spot left.
You got any new material?

1411
01:14:44,604 --> 01:14:47,300
What we got's gonna turn
your brain into shit.

1412
01:14:47,340 --> 01:14:51,037
Dust off the stage,
open mic host. Step aside.

1413
01:14:52,111 --> 01:14:53,601
OK, big shots.

1414
01:14:53,646 --> 01:14:55,045
You're up whenever you're ready.

1415
01:14:55,081 --> 01:14:56,515
Let's blister this asshole.

1416
01:14:56,550 --> 01:14:58,711
Jack, wait! You got the pick?

1417
01:14:58,752 --> 01:15:01,083
Yeah. Got it right here.
Let's go.

1418
01:15:01,120 --> 01:15:03,021
Maybe I should use it tonight
and you use it next time.

1419
01:15:03,056 --> 01:15:05,751
I should use it tonight.
I'm the lead singer.

1420
01:15:05,791 --> 01:15:08,692
Huh! It's a guitar pick.
I'm lead guitar.

1421
01:15:08,728 --> 01:15:10,320
OK, dude, don't freak out on me.

1422
01:15:10,363 --> 01:15:12,228
Let's just work this out rationally, OK?

1423
01:15:12,265 --> 01:15:13,459
We'll take turns with it.

1424
01:15:13,499 --> 01:15:14,898
I'll use it now, you'll use it later.

1425
01:15:14,934 --> 01:15:17,562
I'm not freakin' out,
you're freakin' out.

1426
01:15:17,603 --> 01:15:20,333
Now, just let me hold it
for one second!

1427
01:15:20,373 --> 01:15:21,973
You're never gonna use
this fuckin' pick.

1428
01:15:22,443 --> 01:15:24,432
Aaah!

1429
01:15:24,478 --> 01:15:25,604
Aaaah!

1430
01:15:25,646 --> 01:15:27,137
- No!
- No!

1431
01:15:27,181 --> 01:15:29,012
You guys, the crowd's
gettin' restless in there.

1432
01:15:29,049 --> 01:15:30,538
- No!
- Hey, wh-what's...

1433
01:15:30,584 --> 01:15:31,381
What's goin' on?

1434
01:15:31,419 --> 01:15:33,046
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
what's wrong?

1435
01:15:33,087 --> 01:15:35,055
We can't go on.

1436
01:15:35,089 --> 01:15:37,421
We had the demon's pick...

1437
01:15:37,458 --> 01:15:39,584
but then we broke it...

1438
01:15:39,626 --> 01:15:41,061
and now our masterpiece
will never happen.

1439
01:15:41,096 --> 01:15:44,532
We can't pay the rent because
we won't be fueled by Satan.

1440
01:15:45,066 --> 01:15:47,364
Come on, get up, get up.

1441
01:15:47,402 --> 01:15:49,162
Come on, come on. Stand up.
You're all right.

1442
01:15:49,939 --> 01:15:53,807
You guys, having
some satanic guitar pick...

1443
01:15:53,842 --> 01:15:57,072
isn't gonna make
your rock any better...

1444
01:15:57,111 --> 01:15:58,739
because Satan's not
in a guitar pick...

1445
01:15:58,781 --> 01:16:00,373
he's inside all of us.

1446
01:16:00,416 --> 01:16:01,179
He's in here.

1447
01:16:01,217 --> 01:16:02,878
In your hearts.

1448
01:16:03,919 --> 01:16:06,752
He's what makes us
not want to go to work...

1449
01:16:06,789 --> 01:16:09,316
exercise, or tell the truth.

1450
01:16:09,359 --> 01:16:10,951
He's what makes us want to party...

1451
01:16:10,994 --> 01:16:14,462
and have sex with each other
all night long.

1452
01:16:14,531 --> 01:16:17,193
He's that little voice in your mind...

1453
01:16:17,233 --> 01:16:19,725
that says, "Fuck you"
to the people you hate.

1454
01:16:19,770 --> 01:16:23,637
Now, you can stay out here
and fight on the ground...

1455
01:16:23,673 --> 01:16:27,198
and cry like babies.

1456
01:16:27,242 --> 01:16:31,407
Or you can go in there
like friends and rock.

1457
01:16:32,349 --> 01:16:34,747
So, what's it gonna be?

1458
01:16:36,053 --> 01:16:39,614
Let's go in there and show 'em
what Tenacious D is all about.

1459
01:16:39,657 --> 01:16:40,988
Yeah.

1460
01:16:41,025 --> 01:16:44,324
I already got a guitar pick anyways.

1461
01:16:47,465 --> 01:16:48,465
C'mon.

1462
01:17:22,935 --> 01:17:24,630
Dude, we can still use the pick.

1463
01:17:24,670 --> 01:17:26,467
You use one half, I'll use the other.

1464
01:17:26,506 --> 01:17:27,768
There's still some juice
in there, probably.

1465
01:17:27,807 --> 01:17:28,796
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1466
01:17:28,841 --> 01:17:30,399
Where is that?

1467
01:17:30,443 --> 01:17:31,637
Aaaah!

1468
01:17:40,853 --> 01:17:43,880
♪ I am complete ♪

1469
01:17:43,924 --> 01:17:47,655
♪ Fu-uck ♪

1470
01:17:47,694 --> 01:17:49,525
♪ Yes, you are fucked ♪

1471
01:17:49,563 --> 01:17:51,224
♪ Shit out of luck ♪

1472
01:17:51,264 --> 01:17:54,392
♪ Now I'm complete
and my cock you will suck ♪

1473
01:17:54,434 --> 01:17:56,493
♪ This world will be mine ♪

1474
01:17:56,536 --> 01:17:57,833
♪ And you're first in line ♪

1475
01:17:57,871 --> 01:18:01,739
♪ You brought me the pick
and now you shall both die ♪

1476
01:18:01,775 --> 01:18:08,374
♪ Wait, wait, wait,
you motherfucker ♪

1477
01:18:09,450 --> 01:18:15,286
♪ We challenge you
to a rock-off ♪

1478
01:18:16,424 --> 01:18:21,293
♪ Give us one chance
to rock your socks off ♪

1479
01:18:22,630 --> 01:18:27,568
♪ Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! ♪

1480
01:18:27,603 --> 01:18:31,004
♪ The demon code prevents me ♪

1481
01:18:31,039 --> 01:18:34,998
♪ From declining
a rock-off challenge ♪

1482
01:18:35,043 --> 01:18:37,944
♪ What are your terms? ♪

1483
01:18:37,980 --> 01:18:40,609
♪ What's the ca-a-atch? ♪

1484
01:18:42,151 --> 01:18:49,990
♪ If we win you must take
your sorry ass back to hell ♪

1485
01:18:51,160 --> 01:18:59,160
♪ And also you will have
to pay our rent ♪

1486
01:19:00,237 --> 01:19:02,762
♪ And what if I win? ♪

1487
01:19:04,742 --> 01:19:09,839
♪ Then you can take
Kage back to Hell ♪

1488
01:19:09,880 --> 01:19:10,904
What?

1489
01:19:10,948 --> 01:19:12,472
Trust me, Kage.

1490
01:19:12,516 --> 01:19:13,915
It's the only way.

1491
01:19:13,951 --> 01:19:15,316
What are you talking about?

1492
01:19:15,352 --> 01:19:19,083
♪ To be your little bitch ♪

1493
01:19:19,123 --> 01:19:20,715
Fine!

1494
01:19:20,758 --> 01:19:23,955
♪ Let the rock-off begin! ♪

1495
01:19:23,994 --> 01:19:26,929
Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1496
01:19:31,168 --> 01:19:34,502
♪ I'm the Devil, I love metal ♪

1497
01:19:37,742 --> 01:19:41,769
♪ Check this riff,
it's fucking tasty ♪

1498
01:19:45,083 --> 01:19:48,178
♪ I'm the Devil,
I can do what I want ♪

1499
01:19:48,220 --> 01:19:51,348
♪ Whatever I've got,
I'm gonna flaunt ♪

1500
01:19:51,390 --> 01:19:56,521
♪ There's never been
a rock-off that I've ever lost ♪

1501
01:19:59,164 --> 01:20:02,565
♪ I can't wait to take
Kage back to hell ♪

1502
01:20:02,601 --> 01:20:06,560
♪ I'm gonna fill him
with my hot demon's gel ♪

1503
01:20:06,605 --> 01:20:10,234
♪ I'll make you squeal
like the Scarlet Pimpernel ♪

1504
01:20:12,978 --> 01:20:15,512
♪ No! ♪

1505
01:20:17,416 --> 01:20:18,542
Come on, Kage!

1506
01:20:18,584 --> 01:20:22,680
Let's fight his music with our music.

1507
01:20:22,722 --> 01:20:25,555
♪ There's just no way
that we can win ♪

1508
01:20:25,591 --> 01:20:28,219
- ♪ That was a masterpiece ♪
- Listen to me.

1509
01:20:28,260 --> 01:20:31,424
♪ He rocks too hard
because he's not a mortal man ♪

1510
01:20:31,465 --> 01:20:33,023
Goddamnit, Kage.

1511
01:20:33,066 --> 01:20:35,160
♪ He gonna make you
his sex slave ♪

1512
01:20:35,202 --> 01:20:37,261
♪ You gonna gargle mayonnaise ♪

1513
01:20:37,304 --> 01:20:38,862
- No.
- ♪ Unless we bust ♪

1514
01:20:38,906 --> 01:20:41,898
♪ A massive monster mamojam ♪

1515
01:20:41,942 --> 01:20:45,901
♪ Dude, we've been
through so much shit ♪

1516
01:20:45,946 --> 01:20:47,540
♪ Deactivated lasers
with my dick ♪

1517
01:20:47,582 --> 01:20:53,782
♪ Now it's time
to blow this fucker down ♪

1518
01:20:53,821 --> 01:20:56,986
♪ Come on, Kage, now
it's time to blow doors down ♪

1519
01:20:57,125 --> 01:21:00,288
♪ I hear ya, Jables, now
it's time to blow doors down ♪

1520
01:21:00,328 --> 01:21:02,763
♪ Light up the stage 'cause
it's time for a showdown ♪

1521
01:21:02,797 --> 01:21:05,527
♪ We'll bend you over then we'll
take ya to brown town ♪

1522
01:21:05,567 --> 01:21:08,798
♪ Now we've got
to blow this fucker down ♪

1523
01:21:08,837 --> 01:21:12,135
♪ He's gonna rape me
if we do not blow doors down ♪

1524
01:21:12,173 --> 01:21:14,573
♪ C'mon, Kage 'cause it's time
to blow doors down ♪

1525
01:21:14,609 --> 01:21:17,578
♪ Ooooh we'll pile-drive ya,
it's time for the smack down ♪

1526
01:21:17,612 --> 01:21:20,081
♪ Hey, Antichrist-a, Beelzeboss ♪

1527
01:21:20,115 --> 01:21:21,605
♪ We know your weakness ♪

1528
01:21:21,650 --> 01:21:23,242
♪ Our rock it sauce ♪

1529
01:21:23,285 --> 01:21:25,879
♪ We rock the Casbah,
and blow your mind ♪

1530
01:21:25,921 --> 01:21:29,084
♪ We will defeat you
for all mankind ♪

1531
01:21:29,125 --> 01:21:32,117
♪ You hold the scepter,
we hold the key ♪

1532
01:21:32,161 --> 01:21:34,789
♪ You are the Devil,
we are the D ♪

1533
01:21:34,831 --> 01:21:36,924
♪ We are the D,
we are the D, we are the D ♪

1534
01:21:36,966 --> 01:21:39,992
♪ We are the D, we are the D,
we are the D, we are the D ♪

1535
01:21:40,036 --> 01:21:42,470
♪ We are the D,
we are the D, we are the D ♪

1536
01:21:42,505 --> 01:21:45,565
♪ We are the D, we are the D,
we are the D, we are the D ♪

1537
01:21:45,608 --> 01:21:48,509
♪ We are the D,
we are the D, we are the D ♪

1538
01:21:50,814 --> 01:21:52,247
You guys are fuckin' lame!

1539
01:21:52,282 --> 01:21:54,182
C'mon, Kage,
you're comin' with me.

1540
01:21:55,685 --> 01:21:58,153
Taste my lightning, fucker.

1541
01:21:58,188 --> 01:22:00,315
Nooo!

1542
01:22:00,356 --> 01:22:01,653
Ow!

1543
01:22:01,691 --> 01:22:04,285
Fuck! My fuckin' horn!

1544
01:22:04,861 --> 01:22:06,795
- Oh, no!
- From whence you came...

1545
01:22:06,830 --> 01:22:11,028
you shall remain,
until you are complete again!

1546
01:22:11,235 --> 01:22:13,932
Nooo!

1547
01:22:22,314 --> 01:22:24,544
Fuck you, Kage!

1548
01:22:24,583 --> 01:22:27,177
And fuck you, Jables.

1549
01:22:27,719 --> 01:22:31,712
I'll get you, Tenacious D!

1550
01:22:51,244 --> 01:22:54,611
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1551
01:22:54,647 --> 01:22:55,978
We did it, dude.

1552
01:22:56,782 --> 01:22:58,773
We beat the Devil.

1553
01:22:58,818 --> 01:23:00,479
With our rock.

1554
01:23:00,519 --> 01:23:02,215
Ha ha ha! So good.

1555
01:23:02,256 --> 01:23:05,657
Aaah, man, that was
a monster jam that we played.

1556
01:23:05,692 --> 01:23:07,023
Yeah. Yeah.

1557
01:23:07,060 --> 01:23:10,154
It was, like,
the greatest song in the world.

1558
01:23:10,197 --> 01:23:11,255
It was, wasn't it?

1559
01:23:11,298 --> 01:23:14,199
- How did it go?
- Um...

1560
01:23:16,837 --> 01:23:19,032
- I can't remember.
- Fuck. I can't either.

1561
01:23:19,072 --> 01:23:22,337
You know what? Let's just
lay down a fresh, tasty jam.

1562
01:23:22,376 --> 01:23:24,708
Good idea, rage Kage.

1563
01:23:24,745 --> 01:23:27,680
- Bust out the BOD.
- What?

1564
01:23:27,714 --> 01:23:29,204
The Bong of Destiny.

1565
01:23:29,249 --> 01:23:31,376
Good call.

1566
01:23:31,418 --> 01:23:33,079
Whoa.

1567
01:23:35,956 --> 01:23:37,719
Take it to the head, bitch.

1568
01:23:38,260 --> 01:23:40,250
Draws like a pencil.

1569
01:23:42,130 --> 01:23:43,189
Press record.

1570
01:23:45,634 --> 01:23:47,465
Ooooh!

1571
01:23:47,502 --> 01:23:50,232
- Ha ha ha!
- Yeah!

1572
01:23:50,272 --> 01:23:52,434
Now let's rock it.

1573
01:23:52,474 --> 01:23:53,873
One, two, three.

1574
01:23:53,909 --> 01:23:58,005
♪ 'Cause it's
the Pick of Destiny, child ♪

1575
01:23:58,047 --> 01:24:01,346
♪ You know we will be rockin'
'cause it's fuckin' insane ♪

1576
01:24:01,347 --> 01:24:09,347
Subtitle Fixed and Corrected by DK And wait, there
still a movie..continuing.. Till the end..of it GB.

1577
01:24:01,383 --> 01:24:05,444
♪ It's just the Pick of Destiny, child ♪

1578
01:24:05,487 --> 01:24:09,389
♪ More precious than
a diamond on a platinum chain ♪

1579
01:24:09,425 --> 01:24:13,225
♪ In Venice Beach
there was a man named Kage ♪

1580
01:24:13,262 --> 01:24:16,891
♪ When he was buskin'
he was all the rage ♪

1581
01:24:16,932 --> 01:24:20,595
♪ He met Jables
and he taught him well ♪

1582
01:24:20,636 --> 01:24:23,436
♪ All the techniques
that were developed in Hell ♪

1583
01:24:23,473 --> 01:24:26,909
♪ Cock push-ups
and the power slide ♪

1584
01:24:26,943 --> 01:24:30,674
♪ Gig simulation,
now there's nowhere to hide ♪

1585
01:24:30,714 --> 01:24:34,309
♪ They formed a band
they named Tenacious D ♪

1586
01:24:34,351 --> 01:24:37,149
♪ And then they got
the Pick of Destiny ♪

1587
01:24:37,187 --> 01:24:41,146
♪ 'Cause it's the Pick of Destiny, child ♪

1588
01:24:41,191 --> 01:24:44,024
♪ You know we will be rockin'
'cause it's fuckin' insane ♪

1589
01:24:44,061 --> 01:24:47,793
♪ It's just the Pick of Destiny, child ♪

1590
01:24:47,832 --> 01:24:51,290
♪ Our tasty grooves are better
than a chicken chow mein ♪

1591
01:24:51,335 --> 01:24:55,101
♪ 'Cause he who is sleazy
is easy to pleasey ♪

1592
01:24:55,139 --> 01:24:58,666
♪ And she who is juicy
must be loosey-goosey ♪

1593
01:24:58,709 --> 01:25:04,544
♪ And he who is groovy will
be in my movie so come on! ♪

1594
01:25:05,217 --> 01:25:08,914
♪ The wizard and the demon
had a battle royale ♪

1595
01:25:08,954 --> 01:25:12,617
♪ The demon almost killed him
with an evil kapow ♪

1596
01:25:12,657 --> 01:25:15,751
♪ But then it broke his tooth
and thus the demon said, "Ow!" ♪

1597
01:25:15,794 --> 01:25:19,492
♪ 'Cause it's the Pick of Destiny, child ♪

1598
01:25:19,532 --> 01:25:22,695
♪ You know we will be rockin'
'cause it's fuckin' insane ♪

1599
01:25:22,735 --> 01:25:26,865
♪ It's just the Pick of Destiny, child ♪

1600
01:25:26,906 --> 01:25:30,533
♪ You know our movie's
better than-a Citizen Kane ♪

1601
01:25:30,576 --> 01:25:33,605
♪ 'Cause he who's a geezer
must live in my freezer ♪

1602
01:25:33,646 --> 01:25:37,480
♪ And she who is snarky
is full of malarkey ♪

1603
01:25:37,517 --> 01:25:43,319
♪ And he who is groovy must
be in my movie so come on! ♪

1604
01:25:53,101 --> 01:25:57,697
♪ Oh, 'cause if you're a diva
then go to Geneva ♪

1605
01:25:57,739 --> 01:26:01,402
♪ And if you're a crony
then suck on my boney ♪

1606
01:26:01,443 --> 01:26:04,606
♪ And if you are groovy
then get in my movie ♪

1607
01:26:04,646 --> 01:26:08,707
♪ It's called the Pick of Destiny ♪

1608
01:26:08,750 --> 01:26:12,053
♪ The Pick of Destiny ♪

1609
01:26:12,054 --> 01:26:13,054
♪ The Pick of Destiny ♪

1610
01:26:21,830 --> 01:26:23,695
♪ You can't kill the metal ♪

1611
01:26:26,234 --> 01:26:27,792
♪ The metal will live on ♪

1612
01:26:30,038 --> 01:26:32,006
♪ Punk rock tried to kill the metal ♪

1613
01:26:33,742 --> 01:26:37,769
♪ But they failed as they
were smite to the ground ♪

1614
01:26:39,181 --> 01:26:42,048
♪ New wave tried to kill the metal ♪

1615
01:26:42,084 --> 01:26:46,453
♪ But they failed as they were
stricken down to the ground ♪

1616
01:26:47,223 --> 01:26:50,124
♪ Grunge tried to kill the metal ♪

1617
01:26:50,159 --> 01:26:52,320
Ah ha ha ha!

1618
01:26:52,361 --> 01:26:56,558
♪ They failed as they were
thrown to the ground ♪

1619
01:26:58,534 --> 01:27:03,403
♪ Aaaah! ♪

1620
01:27:03,439 --> 01:27:05,270
♪ Yeah! ♪

1621
01:27:06,576 --> 01:27:10,808
♪ Aaaah! ♪

1622
01:27:10,847 --> 01:27:13,179
♪ Yeah! ♪

1623
01:27:13,216 --> 01:27:15,275
♪ Diddle-iddle-iddle,
diddle-iddle-iddle, iddle-ay ♪

1624
01:27:15,318 --> 01:27:19,277
♪ No one can destroy the metal ♪

1625
01:27:19,322 --> 01:27:22,725
♪ The metal will strike you down
with a vicious blow ♪

1626
01:27:22,760 --> 01:27:26,924
♪ We are the vanquished foes of the metal ♪

1627
01:27:26,964 --> 01:27:30,492
♪ We tried to win,
for why we do not know ♪

1628
01:27:31,036 --> 01:27:35,028
♪ New wave
tried to destroy the metal ♪

1629
01:27:35,072 --> 01:27:39,066
♪ But the metal had its way ♪

1630
01:27:39,111 --> 01:27:43,013
♪ Grunge then tried to dethrone the metal ♪

1631
01:27:43,048 --> 01:27:47,678
♪ But metal was in the way ♪

1632
01:27:47,719 --> 01:27:51,155
♪ Punk rock tried to destroy the metal ♪

1633
01:27:51,190 --> 01:27:55,559
♪ But metal was much too strong ♪

1634
01:27:55,594 --> 01:28:00,190
♪ Techno tried to defile the metal ♪

1635
01:28:00,232 --> 01:28:05,966
♪ But techno was proven wrong, yeah! ♪

1636
01:28:07,907 --> 01:28:09,668
♪ Metal! ♪

1637
01:28:11,644 --> 01:28:13,771
♪ It comes from Hell! ♪

1638
01:29:10,739 --> 01:29:13,104
All right, man.

1639
01:29:13,141 --> 01:29:14,733
This is it.

1640
01:29:14,776 --> 01:29:18,644
Don't make a sound
unless it's a masterpiece.

1641
01:29:18,680 --> 01:29:20,910
Not a fuckin' sound.

1642
01:29:22,851 --> 01:29:24,409
Wait.

1643
01:29:24,452 --> 01:29:26,249
How will I know if it's a masterpiece?

1644
01:29:27,656 --> 01:29:28,918
You'll feel it.

1645
01:29:28,957 --> 01:29:31,255
And if you feel it,
just fuckin' lay it on me.

1646
01:29:45,876 --> 01:29:47,776
Aaah!

1647
01:29:47,811 --> 01:29:48,811
OK.

1648
01:30:02,026 --> 01:30:03,857
Thought I felt somethin'

1649
01:30:05,363 --> 01:30:07,160
Let's hear that back.