Absence Notice

Hello everyone!
Don't worry, you're not reading this because i'm sad again or anything.
As most of my friends know, I have an extremely hovering and overbearing mother. Recently she's been smart in trying to catch me talking to you, but she still doesn't know.
To prevent the worst from happening, i'll be gone for about a week, maybe two, i don't know. Enough to make her think i'm not lying.
If i'm gone for a month, assume that i'm dead!
I'm going to miss you all dearly for the time that i'm gone and I hope you have a wonderful week
-Xern