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whyd they set me up with such high expectations
heavy loads just give me stress and always lands me in bad places
started using heavily when my mental can not take it
every day is so routine, i'm sick and tired of the same shit
my life got so chaotic but nobody help me change it
so i sit alone write down my sins, i sign it and i date it
bottle of pills, fifth of jack, im dead soon i'm not waiting
if there is a god please understand, since day one i've been praying

i never know if people round me notice when i'm losing it
i know i did this to myself right when i started moving shit
sheets of acid, bags of powder, junkies stay abusing it
toxic chemicals, cook in the kitchen, he stay brewing it
dipped into my stash, got no idea why i went through with it
playing tag up with the dragons, just can't stop pursuing it
had a plan i put together, feels like i'm undoing it
it's not confusing i'm just proving that i'll always ruin shit

so what i'm jaded, just assume i'm contemplating
the future and the past, but the presents where i'm staying
i haven't changed in years and honestly i fuckin hate it
something in my life is missing, always cursed with a craving

so can you relate to what im saying
these words are from the heart
i hurt too much to just be playing
reincarnation of satan
and thats not an understatement
the skeletons are in the closet
got the bodies in the basement

yes i'm angry, is that not what i'm conveying
i was hoping every word i use portrays just what i'm saying
maybe you'll understand once i simplify the basics
mentally i'm dying, but now i'm trying to delay any decaying
it seems impossible, all attempts are chronicles
maybe i'd have a chance if every variable was optimal
that simply isn't probable with this amount of obstacles
no matter how methodical my problems are unsolvable