Somewhere Over the Moon

                           Somewhere Over the Moon
                               by tepidGnostic

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  Prologue

   It had been a very long time since I last had a nightmare. So long that I
   would not even remember it if I did not go out of my way to recount my
   failures, they are many, but worthy of remembrance. More than any pony in
   Equestria I can rightfully claim that I have never made the same mistake
   twice. I paused and reflected with some annoyance that this has not
   stopped me from making all new ones.

   Walking through dreams is a complicated affair, but one I had grown
   accustomed to. They say in order to perfect an art one must invest at
   least 10,000 hours. I have invested quite a bit more in my nightly charge.
   Even so, no amount of familiarity could prepare me for what happened next.

   Sleepers are like little worlds, but they are rarely isolated. Threads
   connect us to the ponies we love, and indeed the ponies we hate. Finding
   yourself in Pinkie Pie’s dreams is a simple endeavor. I often found myself
   there quite by accident, much to my chagrin. I did not have many of these
   connections at all. So you can imagine how I felt when the two closest to
   me were severed, one at a time.

   My teacher, my other half, my big sister. Just like that, she was gone,
   and tremors shook the dreamlands as my heart shattered. I curled up on the
   soft grass of some nameless landscape and tried to recover, but fate would
   not offer me any respite. My first real friend since becoming a nightmare
   myself, she was gone too. I felt something very vague, and undefined. This
   was betrayal, but I knew not of what sort.

   I pressed a hoof firmly against my chest and struggled for a breath that
   should not have been necessary, and yet...

   Tears started to pour down my face, matting the fur and falling to the
   ground with a steady tapping sound that seemed to send echoes through the
   world around me. I had failed again, everypony dreaming that night would
   no doubt feel the echoes of their ruler’s despair. Such weakness is... it
   is unseemly.

   But what did they matter, anyway? Celestia and Twilight Sparkle were gone.
   I had never been more sure of anything before in my life. Even in this
   state of heartache, my past betrayed me. You finally got your wish it
   said, do you not remember when you longed for this day? Now you are truly
   alone, and nopony will be there to stop you from doing whatever pleases
   you.

   It’s the final straw. I did not know myself then, so how can I know myself
   now? How can I ever know myself again without Sister to show me? Without
   Twilight to guide me? I lowered my head to the ground and shielded my face
   with a wing, listening to the soft metronome of too loud and definite tear
   drops splashing to the ground.

   Drip.

   Drip.

   I blinked, and the cruel solidity of my chambers begins to crowd my
   beleaguered vision. “How long did I sleep for?” I grumbled as the soft
   glare of sunlight managed to bore it’s way into my mind like a railroad
   spike. I have delicate eyes.

   A steady drip of soda pop fell down from the distant ceiling and splashed
   against my ear, which I flicked with irritation.

   “Oh don’t worry, you slept through the entire night! Just like a wittle
   filly...” That sardonic tone barely required a thought to be placed. "I've
   actually been trying to wake you up for hours. Screaming in your face
   didn't work, mooning you didn't work, It's always the little things that
   annoy us enough to force a response." He snapped his fingers and the
   dripping stopped.

   “Discord... I am not in the mood for your games.”

   “And why not? You didn’t sleep well? The princess of dreams didn’t have
   any nightmares did she? That would be such a shame...”

   I finally rose from my cushion, a suitable replacement for a cloud in the
   heavens, and looked around for my persistent tormenter. “If I did, it
   would be no concern of yours! I...” I stop short and finally begin to
   remember the events from before I awoke. “Discord... Where is my sister,
   and where is Princess Twilight Sparkle?”

   “You know some ponies don’t really like watching trains, but I find it
   really fascinating to watch them switch tracks.” His serpentine likeness
   was only just visible in the corner of my room. Damn glare, the sun can be
   such a nuisance.

   “Where. Is. My. Sister!?” My sister and... colleague, had encouraged me to
   avoid such acts of intimidation, and had claimed that it was a sign of
   wisdom and restraint to avoid that particular voice amplification spell. I
   was far beyond playing games with a spirit of chaos, however.

   Discord reached up with one clawed hand and dug around furiously in his
   ears before removing a comically large fragment of brimstone. “She’s gone,
   your little friend is too.” His sneer was awful, just like old times.
   “You’re all alone, Luna.”

   “It... It cannot be so!” My terror was impossible to restrain. “Tell me
   where they are immediately! Or I’ll-”

   “Or you’ll whatt? Poke around in my dreams and keep me from getting a
   decent night’s sleep? You haven’t been relevant for just over 1,000 years
   now. The only thing that ever gave you strength was your sister, and I
   didn’t even need to get involved. You threw that away all on your own,
   didn’t you?”

   With a wail of rage I leapt from the ground and soared at my offender. I
   was so stupid. Had I not made that mistake the first time we confronted
   each other, all those centuries ago? So much for my perfect record on
   repeat offenses. Of course he vanished in a puff of smoke, and of course
   that damnable snapping of digits echoed through my chamber not a second
   later. Chains of liquorice wrapped around my figure and pulled taut,
   slamming me into the ground.

   “Tsk Tsk... You know, I was going to let you be my understudy. Nightmare
   Moon wasn’t all that bad, at least you had ‘some’ style back then. You
   weren’t entirely without flare, but that said I can’t say I find your
   present demeanor agreeable. Besides, eternal night is not nearly chaotic
   enough to suit my interests. I don’t think I’m going to let you set one
   hoof on this stage now.”

   “I will never forgive you for this!” I struggled uselessly against my
   imprisonment. Even magic did not avail me, as the bonds merely absorbed
   any magical interference before growing in size. It was starting to get
   quite painful.

   “Oh come on, like I’ve never heard that line before.” He snapped his
   fingers and I found myself face to face with the villain. “See Lovely
   Lulu, there’s a reason why you’re destined for irrelevancy, you’re just
   not that creative.”

   I admit that despite my rage, it hurt to hear such a critique of my
   character. It hurt even worse because it was coming from him. He had
   betrayed me, betrayed my sister, betrayed Twilight... I hadn’t even been
   involved in one step of the dance.

   “Now take me for example, I can get very creative. I just love
   improvising!” He coughed loudly and dramatically. “By way of example!”

   For Five Score! Divided by Four!

   Your Memories Removed! Your Body Confused!

   He halted his chant, the dark aura of chaotic energy swirling around him
   seemed to recede a bit. He coughed again to clear his throat and pulled a
   script from the air behind him, a pair of reading glasses materialized on
   his loathsome snout.

   “Blah Blah Blah, Insolence, Blah Blah Blah Far Away Land... Ah! Here we
   are!”

   Your inhibitions unchecked, your sanity wrecked!

   A lifetime of irrelevancy is sure to be a bore!

   But you have to admit! It’s better than the moon!

   I smiled and gloated, or at least as much as one can while bound in
   crushing candy chains. “Thou thinkest that thy curse will hold true? The
   ending does not even rhyme!”

   Much to my alarm, the receding chaos stormed toward me. This wasn't the
   trickster magic I was accustomed to. This wasn't cotton candy, chocolate
   milk, and bamboozled stallions. This was darkness. I shuddered because
   what it really reminded me of was myself, the way I had been one thousand
   years ago.

   The last thing I see are his sickly yellow eyes and furious sneer. “Since
   when did Chaos ever need to rhyme?”

   --------------------------------------------------------------------------

  Nothing to Write Home About

           What a way to close off another year, to think I’d be forced to
   run back home with my tail between my legs. Things were not supposed to be
   like this. I grunted and tossed my bag of clothing into the trunk of my
   ex-roommate’s car. Seven months ago I had abandoned the state where I had
   grown up, in favor of a new life. I was looking for somewhere to be
   myself, somewhere I could finally settle down and succeed. I didn’t end up
   finding any of those things, unfortunately. I bounced around between
   friends and at one point or another found myself experiencing almost every
   region in the country.

           Work was hard to find, and even when I did find it, it was as
   though fate conspired to keep me hapless. I didn’t even want to think
   about how I lost my last job. That was just... Okay, I can’t blame
   everything on destiny. I was pretty much asking for it that time.
   Seriously, what in the seven circles of hell was I thinking?

           “You’re sure you’re going to be alright?” Josh asked as he climbed
   into his vehicle.

           I climbed into the passenger’s seat beside him and scowled. “Does
   it really matter?”

           Josh let out a sigh. He shifted the car into gear and slowly
   exited the parking lot. “Just because I can’t be the one to help you
   doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. You’re a good person, and I can’t
   think of anyone who deserves to have a happy life more than you do.”

           “Yeah well, what we deserve doesn’t really matter.” I muttered
   with an expression dark enough to give thunderheads pause.



           “You’d get more jobs if you weren’t so dramatic.” Josh couldn’t
   help but glance at me, even while driving. His lips curled into a pained
   smile. “So, getting back to my earlier quest-”

           “I’m sure I’ll be fine. My family is cruel but I don’t think
   they'd want me on the streets.”

           The suburbs of Madison Wisconsin were as silent as we were for the
   rest of the trip. Everyone was still inside. It had been a long winter,
   and it was as though people refused to believe it was finally spring.
   Every so often Josh would speak up, as though he were about to start some
   topic to make things less awkward. A noncommittal grunt was all it took to
   shut him up.

           We finally reached the express terminal, and after beating the bus
   driver to death with his own shoes, Ozzy went on to play a great show.
   Sarcasm aside, this affair was pretty dull and uneventful as well. He
   pulled my bag out of the car for me and handed it over like a ‘true host’,
   and insisted he wait with me for the bus.

           “That’s really not going to be necessary, Josh.” I waved him off
   with an irritated sigh. He was always so clingy around me. I guess he’s
   one of those people with ‘a calling to serve others’ or some such thing.
   It made me wonder why he was allowing me to leave at all, but he claimed
   it was ‘for my own good’, that in order to learn and grow I needed to be
   somewhere else. Good riddance, as far as I was concerned. The guy was
   insufferable. What happened next only served to prove my point.

   He deftly grabbed my outstretched hand and kissed it. The position forcing
   him into a slight bow. “Safe travels then, my princess.”

   I blushed so hard that I swore my limbs were going numb with blood
   deprivation. I looked around wildly and noticed a few less than savory
   folks snickering at me. “Josh!” I yelled all too loudly. “What the hell
   are you doing?!” I finally regained my senses and yanked my hand back. I
   was breathing hard, my shoulders rising and falling with the effort.

   Josh, that bastard, he just smiled at me and winked. Then he turned
   around, hopped into his car, and sped off.

   “What the hell was that about?!” I growled into the cold evening air. A
   few individuals who hadn’t been looking at me before had joined their
   fellows. I flinched, I hadn’t meant for my voice to be that loud, or to
   carry that far.

   I pulled a massive pair of headphones from around my neck and slipped them
   over my ears before retreating to a safe distance. The gentle sounds of
   saxophone music and rain calmed my tired nerves, and I struggled to get my
   heart rate under control.

   ‘It’s too much.’ I thought bitterly. I should really see a therapist or
   shrink or something, get on some medicine, because getting myself under
   control is not getting any easier. I glanced back over at the crowd of
   people. Some of them were laughing amongst themselves, and although I
   wasn’t lacking in clarity—I knew that they could be laughing at some
   ridiculous picture on their smart phones—I was equally certain that what
   they were laughing at was me.

   I frowned and skipped to the next song, hoping it would do a better job of
   calming me down. Waiting for the bus wasn’t helping my nerves either. The
   city didn’t even have a proper greyhound terminal, and catching the bus
   required sitting in an open air transfer point where local buses met.
   Every minute that passed by my heart beat a little faster. ‘What if the
   driver had an accident? What if I’m at the wrong transfer point?’  I
   reached into the pocket of my cheap black jacket and felt around for my
   tickets before inspecting my pants pockets. A faint wave of relief washed
   over me when I finally found them, but it was like a drop in the ocean in
   the long run.



           04:45 PM 04/29 Madison(e) to Chicago

   There was quite a bit more information beneath that, but honestly it was
   all Greek to me. Just a bunch of gate numbers and codes relevant to some
   employee with a computer. So I was at least there at the appropriate time,
   but that didn’t do anything to reassure me regarding location. I leaned
   back against the plastic cage I had placed myself in and rest my eyes.
   ‘You double checked before leaving. You triple checked. Just calm down.’

           The bus must have pulled up while I was battling my inner demons,
   because when I opened my eyes it was parked by the curb across the street.
   With a panicked yelp I rushed over, bag of clothing in tow. I felt pretty
   self conscious struggling with my bag. Once again I fought to rationalize
   my actions. I was pretty sure the bus was going to be there for 15 minutes
   so everyone could have a smoke, but that didn’t stop me from fleeing like
   it would leave just as I stepped in front of the doors. Then everyone on
   the bus could laugh at me, just like the people with the phones had.

           I handed my ticket to the bus driver just as he was lighting up a
   death stick of his own. I fought to keep my breathing under control after
   the short dash, but it was no use. The composure train had left the
   station.

   He took one look at the ticket and muttered out through pursed lips. “Eric
   Delano?”

   “That’s me.”

   He looked up at me. “Got any ID?”

   “Oh, yes! Of course!” I dropped my bag and fumbled for my wallet before
   handing it to him. I flinched at the perceived faux pas of not removing
   the card myself, but he seemed content to take it all in stride.

   “First time riding a bus like this?”

   “Uh... Yeah.” I lied through my teeth, as if that would help me save face
   at this point. First time nervousness will excuse everything, yeah right.

   He yanked open the compartment under the bus and gestured to me. “Go ahead
   and toss it in.” He said while flicking his cigarette clean of ash.

   I dutifully grabbed my bag, and after swinging it back and forth a few
   times for leverage, I released it into the compartment. The driver slammed
   it with a loud click, and I practically sprinted onto the bus while
   everyone else enjoyed their break.

   With the bus abandoned I made my way to the very back, and wondered why
   any group would fight to escape that place. It was so peaceful back here.
   Maybe it was just the principle of the matter? I opened my messenger bag
   and began shuffling through it like the over sized purse that it was. With
   a bit of effort I wrestled my laptop free and plugged it into the
   conveniently provided power outlet. No internet yet, that would have to
   wait until the driver started the bus. I closed the lid to my laptop and
   kicked back along the three seats lining the back wall of the bus.

   Not much longer after that, people began to re-board the bus. My heart
   started beating again as I began speculating as to who amongst them would
   do battle with me over the coveted sleeping roost. Would it be the obvious
   tweakers behind door number one? Or what about the rock hard ex-con behind
   door number two? Amusingly enough, they both took seats toward the front
   of the bus and began discussing, of all things, something involving rape
   countermeasures. I didn’t even bother to hear the rest of that
   conversation.

   My senses were pried from introspection when a boy about my age prowled
   down the aisle and towered over me. I sat up, evacuating my position of
   vulnerability.

   “Sorry to disturb you, but I was back here before everyone got off the
   bus.” He pulled his bag from the overhead to prove his point.

   “Oh, sorry about that...” I mumbled, the colour was starting to rise in my
   cheeks. “I’ll just find somewhere else to sit.”

   “No need!” He said as he swung himself down into the chair nearest the
   aisle, cutting off my escape. He placed his bag on his lap and started
   digging through it, removing a few pieces of candy and popping them into
   his mouth merrily. “We can sit together! Share the road!”

   Oh joy of joys. Maybe I can ditch him at the next transfer point. Another
   distant voice rang out in my head. I could always just get up and leave.
   ‘You don’t need to stay here just because he told you to.’ But something
   in the way he carried himself just made me want to do exactly as I was
   told. I opened my laptop and turned myself awkwardly so that he couldn’t
   see what I was doing.

   “So where are you headed?” My companion said in a perfectly friendly and
   socially reasonable tone.

   “San Diego...” I responded as was expected of me. That I could have lied
   did not even occur to me. I was not a very good liar. “What about you?”

   “I’m heading to LA! Guess that means we’ll be traveling together for the
   next two days!”

   ‘Dear Odin, I would ask you for help but you’ve clearly saw fit to screw
   me already. I hope you get god-cancer, the end.’

   The bus hummed to life and my precious internet signal was delivered unto
   me. I recoiled in on myself like the frightened creature I was and set to
   work ignoring my shiny new friend. We were halfway to Chicago before he
   spoke to me again.

   “You looking at porn or something?”

   “. . . No?” I couldn’t even begin to isolate my loathing from my voice. I
   don’t believe I even tried.

   “Let me take a look.” He leaned over the seat and snuck a peek at a
   conversation I was having with my friend Josh.

   A well drawn OC for one of Luna’s Night Guard was the only attention
   grabbing detail on the screen. Josh prefered the term ‘Thestral’, and
   didn’t seem to care that Thestrals were pretty soundly the intellectual
   property of some British fantasy author. I quickly minimized the portion
   of Skype that displayed profile images and cursed myself silently.

   “Do you mind? I’m trying to have a private conversation with one of my
   friends!” I growled at him and somehow found a way to shift even further
   away.

   There was an awkward silence, but I was grateful that he seemed to
   understand he had overstepped his bounds. He stared straight ahead for a
   while before speaking again. “So you’re into My Little Pony then? Twilight
   Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, stuff like that?”

   “My friend is, I’m not. Why? Are you a Brony or something?”

   “Not really, I have a daughter, and she’s really into it. If I don’t know
   how to hold a conversation with her about it she gets really upset.”

   “That series ended like five years ago. Why would your daughter care about
   it?”

   He shrugged his shoulders and took a candy bar from his bag. “Reruns.”

   Josh sent me another message that urgently demanded my attention. I
   replied with frantic keystrokes.

   Wintermute: Can’t talk now, really nosy asshole sitting next to me.

   Nightwatch: You should really watch your language princess!

   Wintermute: Why the hell do you keep calling me that? Is this some kind of
   inside joke?

   Nightwatch: It’s not really a joke.

   Nightwatch: Well, maybe a little.

   Nightwatch: In your time staying here I’ve just realized that there is a
   lot more to you than most give you credit for. You can be a bit...
   difficult to deal with, but I get the impression that you’re someone worth
   protecting, and dare I say it, respecting!

   Wintermute: Okay. So why the hell aren't I a prince, or better yet, a
   king?

   Nightwatch: A delicate flower like you? Please.

   Wintermute: . . .

   Wintermute: Your first born is mine. I am going to cut them into pieces
   and sacrifice each bit to every Eldritch Abomination I can think of, and a
   few that I can’t.

   Nightwatch: See? This is what I am talking about: Delicate. Flower.

   Nightwatch: That and my birthday is coming up, I’ve never really cared
   about that in the past (I mean except the big 21, but come on :3) but I
   dunno, for some reason I’m feeling really excited!

   Wintermute: When’s your birthday again?

   Nightwatch: May 1st! The day before yours!

   Wintermute: Well, now I feel like a jerk.

   Nightwatch: Why is that?

   Wintermute: I can’t exactly get you anything this year, and as much as you
   irritate me sometimes, you’ve done a lot for me and I dunno...

   Nightwatch: That’s okay! I’m not getting you anything either!

   Nightwatch: Getting me nothing will be my birthday gift to you.

   Nightwatch: Didn’t you say you couldn’t talk?

   Josh didn’t need to tell me twice. I closed my laptop and tucked it under
   the seat in front of me. I struggled to get comfortable in vain, and I
   guess my travel buddy was feeling it too, because he started talking
   again.

   “I’m James, by the way.”

   “Eric.”

   “So why don’t you like the show, out of curiosity?”

   I really wasn’t happy with where this conversation was going. my
   relationship with Friendship is Magic was Fire and Ice. I hated it, I
   loved it, I loved to hate it. My friends were almost entirely bronies to
   this day, and they described me as ‘Tsundere for MLP’.

   “A lot of the stuff it seems to preach, like the importance of friendship,
   or the struggle between harmony and chaos, are things that I believed in
   to begin with. I’ve never really felt at peace with my family, so friends
   were far more important to me. I never really believed in gods, because
   they never answered when I talked to them.” I paused and wished
   desperately for something to drink.

   James seemed to have a sense for such things, because he held out a bottle
   of water and asked with a smile. “Thirsty?”

   I stared at the bottle quietly, debating whether or not to accept
   something from a stranger. Thirst won out and I broke the seal before
   taking a sip.

   “You can keep it, I’ve got more.” He gestured to continue. “You were
   saying something about gods?”

   “Gods are almost always jerks, anyway. But that doesn’t mean I don’t think
   there’s something out there, something higher than me. I guess if I had to
   put a name to it, I would call it Harmony.” I took a much larger sip, my
   mouth was starting to get dry from all the explaining. “So here comes this
   show that takes all these nebulous feelings I had, and then parades them
   around with all the seriousness of a children’s show. It even had real
   gods, the way gods should be. Except they’re not, they’re ‘just
   princesses’. It was like they served their people, instead of the people
   just worshipping them. The whole thing felt vaguely insulting, like it was
   picking at old wounds.” I paused, I had really gotten into this
   explanation. Where did all this come from? “And the series finale was
   absolutely disgusting.”

   He raised an eyebrow at that. “Really? How so?”

   I turn to get a good look at him, for the first time actually paying
   attention to the little details. He was a bit unkempt. His brown hair was
   beyond taming, and the whites of his eyes had a slight yellow tinge that
   sort of grossed me out. I tried to remember what illness would cause that,
   but was drawing a blank. Jaundice, maybe?

   “I don’t really want to talk about it, it was just messed up, especially
   for a children’s show.”

   He hummed thoughtfully and twiddled his thumbs. “Fascinating.”

   “Quite.” I muttered with a hint of sarcasm.

   We spent the rest of the ride to Chicago locked in another one of our
   awkward silences. When the driver announced our stop and pulled in, I was
   understandably in a hurry to get off that bus and far away from him.
   James, however, took his sweet time getting up and gathering his things.
   Before moving down the aisle he turned toward me and held out his hand.

   “See you on the next bus, my good friend.” His smile was from ear to ear.

   I’m not sure what I was thinking. I wasn’t thinking, I couldn’t have been
   thinking. I took his hand in mine and shook it, and smiled right back.

   “Yeah, see you then.”

   The layover at the Chicago terminal was an hour long, and the sun had long
   since set when we started boarding. I hesitated while handing my bag to
   one of the workers and stared up at the sky. Too cloudy to see anything, I
   reflected that I hadn’t really seen the moon or stars since moving to
   Wisconsin. Broken English snapped me out of my revery and I handed off my
   bag before climbing up onto the bus and making for the back. James was not
   on yet, but I was certain he would be on not long after me. Instead of
   taking the very back like last time, I say one row ahead, and took an
   aisle seat. In a show of uncharacteristic assertiveness, I even placed my
   messenger bag on the window seat. Thus did I broadcast to the world my
   desire to remain undisturbed.

   ‘I AM A CREATURE OF SOLITUDE’ That is what my display was code for.

   Sure enough, James was in the next group of people to board the bus. He
   smiled when he saw me, but that expression of joy soured quickly when he
   saw where I had chosen to sit. He didn’t say anything as he slipped into
   the very back, and I placed my headphones over my ears in any case. After
   the bus got started I curled up over the span of my two seats and stared
   out at the murky Chicago night. It was beautiful in it’s own way, though
   the pollution being pumped out combined with the street lights to give the
   air a diseased yellow colour. I immediately  thought of James’s eyes and
   shuddered before propping my head just under the window.

   Falling asleep certainly took a while. The bus was bouncing up and down,
   and that coupled with my inability to see where we were going from this
   angle was giving me a mild case of motion sickness. Eventually I started
   to nod off, the music from my headphones lured me to sleep and drowned out
   the disrespectful jerks who didn’t seem to think the driver’s requests to
   remain quiet during nighttime trips applied to them.

   Sometimes while in the process of nodding off, I’d stare out through the
   cracks in the seats to the row behind me, and I’d see James sitting there
   with his arms crossed. He never took his eyes off the row of chairs in
   front of him.

   I didn’t like his expression, not even a little.

   This had to be a dream. It just had to be, because the air was colourful
   in a way that stretched my imagination and yet seemed all too familiar.
   Also, my sister was a horse.

   I want to cry out to her. To tell her for the umpteenth time not to trust
   that... that thing beside her. Together they battle something far larger
   than either of them. The notion of something larger than the forces of
   harmony and chaos makes me want to quiver in a corner like a little filly,
   and I am ashamed. I am ashamed because part of me is glad that I am not
   there. My big sister will take care of this, my big sister always does.
   Except she doesn’t take care of things. Not this time. The creature
   smashes her down from the heavens and into the dirt, and her new friend
   banishes the creature back to the pit below with a snap of his fingers.

   Moon and stars, he’s stronger than I remember him. How could he have
   become so? In a puff of condescending smoke, he is beside my sister. She
   begs him, pleads for help, but I think in this moment even she knows what
   is going to happen next. He dances around, all wit and cunning, and with a
   great flourish of drama kicks my sister down into the molten rock below.

   Setting switches with the abrupt subtlety characteristic of dreams, and we
   are in a castle. My friend... Twilight Sparkle is there. I feel so
   ridiculous calling this creature my friend, but why? The spirit of chaos
   arrives, and already he begins filling her head with lies. She trusts him.

   It isn’t fair. She is so young, her coronation wasn’t even a decade ago
   and already she was having it stripped from her. She doesn’t realize what
   is happening until the curse is long since begun, and then she’s gone. The
   spirit disappears, and I’m left alone.

   I stay there for some time, drowning in the silence, and then his voice
   starts to drift up through the dream.

   “Why are you getting so worked up Lulu? It’s just a cartoon for little
   girls!”

   I woke up with a start, and earned the attention of the people sitting
   across from me for my trouble. I turned my head and squinted out the
   window. For once it seemed like I got a decent sleep while on the bus,
   because the sun was up. We must be pretty close to St. Louis at this
   point. I took my headphones off and placed them around my neck, and was
   greeted by a crunching sound from the row behind me. My stomach started to
   rumble and I couldn’t help but sneak a peek.

   James had removed a large green Ziploc from his bag, and it was filled to
   the brim with cucumber slices with the skins still on them. Just the way
   that I liked them. He smiled the same way he always smiles. He took
   another bite of his slice and finished it before making his next move.
   “You want some?” He held out the bag. “We can always share them. You’d
   have to come back here though. I don’t really feel like leaning forward
   with the bag every time you need to grab one.”

           I wrestled with the invitation before reaching a conclusion. I did
   have some money left, but my reserves were low enough that any dollar I
   had was very valuable, and worth conserving. I swung myself from my seat
   using the momentum of the bus to help me along and collapsed into the
   chair next to him. “Yeah... Yeah I do...”

           He held the bag open for me and I reached inside.

           “Take as many as you’d like!”

           I swallowed at the blank check being offered to me and fought to
   restrain my hunger impulses, or I was likely to take off with the whole
   bag. ‘Why must my body be a furnace?!’ Erring on the side of humility I
   took two. This was not nearly enough to fill me, but god did it make me
   feel better. Each one had a slight coat of dew-like moisture, and yet had
   managed to avoid becoming soggy. They were more delicious than any
   cucumbers I have ever had, and in that moment I probably would have
   christened them the greatest food stuffs I had ever consumed.

           We danced around the issue of the food for a few minutes, him
   trying to make idle chatter and me trying to avoid the fact that I
   desperately wanted more. I’ll never understand other people. How the hell
   can they just sit there like that with a perfectly decent meal? If they
   weren’t hungry, why were they eating? If they were hungry, why isn’t it
   gone yet? After a few more glances at the big bag of cucumbers that he was
   for the most part ignoring, James smiled upon me once more and said “Do
   you want the rest of them? I’m not actually very hungry.”

           I snatched the bag with speed and a lack of grace that was
   borderline rude. James’s face lit up with amusement and he removed a
   bottle of cola from his bottomless bag of goodies.

           “Guess you really were hungry. How do they taste?”

           “Oh my god they are so amazing...” I managed to blurt out between
   slices of cucumber.

           This garnered a chuckle, and he leaned over and patted me on the
   shoulder. “Good. Hey, do you smoke?” He pulled a medium sized object from
   a charger and presented it to me. It was one of those electronic
   cigarettes, but in the shape of an ornate pipe.

           I’ve never really experienced peer pressure growing up, I
   accomplished this by not having peers. Everyone always felt so... beneath
   me, in grade school. High school had it’s own distractions. So suffice it
   to say I wasn’t prepared for the feeling of guilt that welled up inside me
   when I even thought of turning down this guy’s gifts. He had been so
   polite and generous to me, hadn’t he? Wouldn’t it be rude for me to deny
   him, after all he had been through to become my friend?

           “I... Don’t.” I finally stammered.

           James smiled. “Suit yourself!” He raised the pipe to his mouth and
   inhaled deeply, puffs of water vapor streaming from his nostrils. The air
   was filled with the smells of vanilla, blueberries, and something else I
   couldn’t quite put my finger on. It was intoxicating just via contact, and
   I was really starting to regret my decision, but I was never one to
   reverse my position, at least not this quickly.

           While James continued to inhale from his majestic pipe, I decided
   I would compensate myself by inhaling what was left of my cucumbers. It
   didn’t take long, and once I started balling up the bag he reached over
   and clapped me on the back.

           “You eat like a horse, did you know that?” He laughed like this
   observation was somehow hilarious. All I could think about was how the
   uncomfortably friendly individual was touching me again.



    My heart rate was starting to peak by the time the bus pulled into it’s
   stop, and we were all ordered off the bus so that it might be cleaned and
   refueled. With the gift of my aisle seat, I took off in a flash, and
   nearly forgot my messenger bag in the process. The terminal in St. Louis
   was large enough for me to hide from James for the whole hour we were
   stuck there.

           I decided that even after the bag of cucumbers, I was still
   starving. In retrospect they hadn’t been very filling at all. So I wasted
   some of my money on an incredibly over priced miniature pizza from the
   building’s food court, and quickly isolated myself to a corner before
   eating it. I nearly panicked and bolted from my position when I saw James
   round the corner, but he wasn’t looking for me. He was talking to three
   other people that looked to be about the same age as us. They were smiling
   and laughing and apparently having a good time in general. This suited me
   just fine, keep the bastard distracted while I relax and get some
   real food in me.

           I finished my snack and made for the line forming to re-board the
   bus. By the time I got there it was already overflowing, and I was
   starting to get worried that there wouldn’t be room for everyone. That
   might not be so bad... actually, the next bus might not have James on it.

           Who was I kidding? If I got bumped to another bus, I had every
   reason to believe my stalker would be there waiting for me. He’d just have
   to concede that there wasn’t room for him either. I took the last place in
   line and began to fidget anxiously. I could see those three people that
   James had been speaking with before, they were near the front of the line.
   Every so often one or two would run outside to smoke a cigarette, with the
   girl holding their place in line. I grit my teeth and tried not to make a
   big deal about the situation. If they left the line then they should go to
   the back of the line! What is even the point of having a line otherwise?

           “Hello again!” James called enthusiastically as he walked by me.
   His hand darted out like he was trying to make me flinch, just like my
   brothers used to always do.

           What really rendered me shell-shocked is what he had actually
   ended up doing. He did not slug me, he didn’t even clap me on the
   shoulder. He reached out for my chest and pinched me. Right through my
   shirt, where my nipple would be. I shut down immediately, trying to
   process what exactly was going on. My first thought was: ‘Did that just
   happen?’ My second thought was: ‘Am I supposed to scream rape yet?’

           In the end I had absolutely no idea what to do. I didn’t think I
   should tell anyone. It’s not like it was anything serious, they’d probably
   just laugh at me and tell me to stand up for myself if it bothered me. No,
   it was clear that the only appropriate tactic was avoidance. I flinched
   away from him and sealed my lips tightly in a look of disapproval. I
   didn’t say anything back.

           James smirked and strode confidently toward the front of the line
   where the other three were situated. “See you on the bus!” He called back
   with enthusiasm.

           ‘Please let the bus be overbooked. PLEASE let the bus be
   overbooked.’



   The bus wasn’t overbooked. Somehow they had managed to book a person for
   every seat without overbooking at all. There is no God. I was more certain
   of that then ever before. To make matters worse, every seat at the front
   of the bus was taken. James and his motley crew had already set up shop in
   the back, and that is where the last remaining seat was.

           It was going to be a long ride to Las Vegas.

           Sitting next to James was a very awkward experience. It was like
   nothing had ever happened at the terminal, and honestly I was starting to
   wonder if anything had happened.

           The three people he was hanging out with were on their way to
   Vegas. They seemed nice enough, although they weren’t really in my social
   caste, not that I belonged to such a thing. There names were Caleb,
   Chelsie, and... Honestly, I never got the last one’s name. He was an odd
   kid that everyone seemed to pick on. He seemed to take it in stride
   though. It was like he had taken so many drugs that he was just
   permanently happy and oblivious. He wore a hat that was in the likeness of
   that green platypus character from some old Disney show, and the ear flaps
   were comically large and reached down to his waist.

           The four of them took turns with James’s pipe, and eventually they
   even managed to talk me into giving it a try. The flavors were much more
   intense than I had anticipated, and I choked the first time. The rest of
   the group smiled and laughed, like they had initiated me into the higher
   mysteries. I did feel sorta different after the first time, but the
   cartridge they were using must have had a bit of nicotine in it. Something
   like that would account for such a thing.

           The ride to Denver was long and cramped, and with everyone so up
   in each other’s business, I couldn’t speak to any of my friends online. My
   real friends, I reminded myself. They wouldn’t make me feel uncomfortable
   like this, so out of my element. But then, maybe it is a good thing to be
   out of your element every once in awhile?

   When we got to Denver we lost a majority of the passengers and acquired a
   couple dozen more. Everyone was much more spaced out and I used that
   opportunity to move closer to the front. James didn’t really seem to like
   this idea much, but I told him I needed to get some sleep, and he accepted
   that. It was a bit difficult to get any shut eye with those four partying
   constantly. James had made full use of his never ending bag of treats.

           Things were much quieter and relaxed up front, but unfortunately
   after switching buses in Denver, we no longer had access to Internet, so
   once again I was cut off from the outside world. I managed to get some
   shut eye early on, and when I woke up we were quite a distance from the
   city. The sun was high enough for it to be early morning, and the bus was
   surrounded on all sides by green hills. It was a pretty peaceful setting.

           Then we entered a tunnel, and what happened next was like visiting
   Narnia or something.

   The tunnel seemed to go on forever, and a few of the people near me were
   starting to panic. In the row of seats just in front of me, a little girl
   stared at the wall as it whizzed past us with a look of spiritual awe, and
   my expression wasn’t much different once we exited the other side.

   The green hills were gone, and were replaced with massive coniferous trees
   capped with snow. Everything was covered with snow. I was awestruck at the
   idea that anything could still be blanketed in the white stuff this close
   to May. It was like I had been transported to another world.

   Then I got a good look at the mountains. I had thought I had seen
   mountains growing up in California, but that didn’t even compare to these.
   These mountains struck a chord deep in my soul, and soared into the air
   before being obscured by clouds. A few of them even looked like massive
   towers with turrets of stone jutting into the sky. I wanted to know why no
   one had built any monasteries on them, or castles. A castle on top of one
   of these mountains would be good. Surely we had the technology for such
   things now.

   I shook my head to clear the idea. “Castle on a mountain eh? Very original
   Eric.” I curled up on the seats and stared up through the window to watch
   the mountains as they passed.

   Apparently my show of wonder didn’t go unnoticed, and the little girl from
   in front had taken an interest in me, deciding she had stumbled upon a
   kindred spirit. She would occasionally poke her head over the seat and
   stare at me when she thought I wasn’t looking, before darting back down
   when she felt I had seen her.

   I must have been feeling pretty silly and energetic after passing by the
   mountains, because I actually played along. After awhile it turned into a
   game of who could make the silliest face. In actuality, it was more like
   me making faces and her mimicking them, but laughing first and letting her
   win seemed the sporting thing to do.

   Her parents weren’t very far away, but they seemed okay with us
   interacting. Normally parents are terrified of me being near their kids,
   like I’m some kind of pedophile if I allow myself to be within five feet
   of their larval offspring. I chalked it up to her being hyper, the trip
   being long and crowded, and them being exhausted.

   Eventually I started fiddling around with my laptop and she hopped into
   the seat next to me.

   “My name is Sarah.” She spoke, her voice revealing the same unease I felt
   when talking to strangers.

   “I’m Eric.” I replied quietly, as though afraid I’d scare her away like a
   flock of birds.

   “Where are you going?” She tilted her head. I got the impression she was
   worried that I’d get irritated with her for asking so many questions. I
   tried to consider how Chelsie or Caleb might respond, and suddenly Her
   fears didn’t seem too unfounded.

   “San Diego.”

   “Is that where you want to go?”

   That follow up caught me completely off-guard. “No... Not really.”

   “So then, where do you want to go?”

   “I dunno. Home, I guess.”

   “Your home isn’t in San Diego?”

   I scoffed at the idea. “No, definitely not.”

   “So then where is it?”

   I closed my laptop and started putting it away. “I guess that’s what I’m
   trying to figure out.”

   She nodded. That answer seemed to finally satisfy her stream of inquiry.
   That just made things awkward as she sat there trying to come up with a
   reason for her to be there.

   “Where do you want to go?” I attempted to ease the tension.

   “It doesn’t really matter where I want to go.” She crossed her arms and
   sulked at her parents. “It only matters where they want to go.”

   I couldn’t help but laugh at the pint-sized display of anger. That seemed
   to wound her a bit, but I pressed on. “So when you’re an adult, where do
   you want to go?”

   Her little blue eyes lit up and she practically jumped from her seat.
   “Appleloosa!”

   I blinked, it couldn’t be. She must be talking about the horse club or
   something, this trip was already way too uncanny. “Come again?”

   “You know, Appleloosa?” She stared at me like I was mentally handicapped.
   “It’s in the south?”

   It’s a bit late in the day to be crushing a kid’s hopes, so why the hay
   not. She can visit Appleloosa when she’s all grown up.

   “Of course! Right. I knew that, I just thought you were talking about some
   other town, that’s all.”

   The two of us sat there, and the silence was even more awkward than
   before. She looked like she was about to speak several times. Her mouth
   would open and close like a fish trying to breath water on land. Finally
   she slipped off the chair and went back to her seat in the row in front of
   me. I couldn’t help but feel like some profound failure at dealing with
   little kids.

   We passed into Utah, and the sun started to make it descent toward the
   horizon. It was amazing how empty this country is. I reflected on how it
   took riding a bus to really appreciate that truth. I wouldn’t want to live
   here in a time before cars. Not that I’d ever actually owned one myself.

   I curled up on my two seats and started to drift off, and every so often
   Sarah would peek at me through the cracks in her seats. As long as it
   wasn’t James, I could stand the invasion of privacy.

   A few dreamless hours of sleep later I awoke to a desert landscape and a
   night sky littered with stars. It was hard to see them through the bus’s
   light pollution, but they were there. Part of me wanted to order the
   driver to stop so I could run off into the desert, find a cave somewhere,
   and sleep next to some roaring fire that I would magic up with my
   absolutely pathetic survival skills.

   Sarah was peeking her head over the top of her seat again, and she yelped
   when she saw that I was awake.

   “I’m not going to gobble you up or anything, if that’s what you’re afraid
   of.”

   She poked her head back over the side with a huge smile on her face, like
   what I had just said was hilarious and proved everything at the same time.

   “Hello again.” She stated with a sense of pride, like she found some
   ancient treasure and was about to present it to the world.

   “Hi.”

   Her smile was tarnished by an expression of uncertainty, and she glanced
   around nervously before continuing. “Uhm... I just wanted to say that your
   sister is still out there. I just know it!”

   I tilted my head, part of me wondered if I wasn’t still sleeping, but then
   I remembered I had an uncanny awareness for such things. “I don’t have a
   sister.”

   Sarah looked mortified by what I had just said. It was like she had been
   my sister, and I had just openly denounced her. “But you do! You do have a
   sister! She hasn’t given up on you, so you can’t give up on her!”

   I squinted at her, my mouth dropping open in disbelief. “Kid, I think
   you’ve got me confused for someone else.”

   She dropped back down behind her seat, I could only just make out that she
   had crossed her arms. “Somepony,” she corrected me with a quiet snarl of
   frustration. “And you’re the one that’s confused... not me...”

   I contemplated that odd little exchange for what must have been an hour
   before drifting back to sleep. I know it’s impossible to sleep without
   dreaming, so I marked their absence as a consequence of the bus bouncing
   up and down. It would explain why I never felt rested, and why sleep just
   felt like a way to skip ahead through time, at least. The dreamless sleep
   was really starting to mess with my mind, though. I’ve always been pretty
   good at lucid dreaming, or knowing when I was asleep, but I can’t remember
   actually getting bent out of shape if I didn’t have them.

   When I woke up the sun was still down, and we were pulling into Las Vegas.
   The bus did a pretty good job of getting to the station while also making
   sure not to go anywhere near anything interesting. When we arrived, I
   waited for everyone else to get off first. I didn’t want to deal with
   people in any capacity right now, and that included dealing with traffic.
   Sarah reached down over the side of her seat and grabbed my hair with a
   sharp yank. I yelped in anger before apologizing, and then said my
   goodbyes. Her parents came over to collect her, apologized, and dragged
   her off.

   Eventually Chelsie and the other two came up and said goodbye as well,
   they practically dragged the nameless one by the collar of his shirt. I
   had no idea what they’d gotten up to back there, and I honestly didn’t
   want to know.

   I was confused at first when I didn’t see James get off the bus. It must
   have been a blessing, maybe he was locked up in the bathroom finishing a
   beer or something. I grabbed my bag and got off the bus with all due
   haste.

   Waiting in the terminal was a bit exciting. All I could think about was
   the prospect of being almost done with this terrible ordeal. I saw Sarah
   one last time as her family headed for the exit. She waved, so I waved
   back. Chelsie and Kaleb spent a few minutes arguing by the rental lockers,
   then they took off without a word. Still no sign of James.

   The sun was starting to come up by the time we started to board the bus
   for LA. I didn’t want to risk running into James in the back, so I took
   the seat immediately behind the busdriver. With the big plastic shell
   surrounding him I was a bit cramped, but I figured I’d also have the best
   access to the WiFi. If you went all the way to the back it tended to drop
   in and out constantly.

   My heart stopped when James appeared out of nowhere. He reached forward
   and pinched me, just like before, and my mind died a second death.

   “Hey! Mind if I sit here?”

   ‘YES! I ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY MIND! I WILL RIP YOU TO PIECES AND USE YOUR
   SOUL FOR FIRE WOOD YOU INSUFFERABLE DEGENERATE!’

   “S-Sure...” I think I threw up in my mouth a little.

   He took a seat and the already cramped quarters became my own special
   hell. It was almost impossible for me to open my laptop up and make use of
   it. But I made it work.

   Nightwatch: Hey! GUESS WHAT?

   Wintermute: Today is your birthday?

   Nightwatch: Tonight, specifically!

   Wintermute: Okay then.

   Wintermute: Look, I can’t really talk, there is some perverted asshole
   sitting next to me and he keeps trying to pinch my chest.

   Wintermute: And also he's a rubbernecker.

   Nightwatch: =O

   Nightwatch: Has he violated your honor?!

   Wintermute: I... What?

   Nightwatch: Give me his name and face, and he shall not see another
   sunrise!

   Wintermute: I think this is getting out of hand. Look, I already said I
   can’t talk. Warning issued. I will talk to you later, Happy Birthday.

   Nightwatch: Thanks!

   I minimized Skype and opened up a folder of videos saved on my computer.
   What decently engaging and lengthy show can I watch, that I also have no
   issues being seen to enjoy in public? I settle for old episodes of the
   Game of Thrones. Secretly I hoped this would reinstate my manhood and
   prevent the lecherous bastard sitting next to me from treating me like
   some schoolyard fill- I mean... schoolgirl. That is definitely what I
   meant to think. To myself. I am having a conversation with myself aren’t
   I?

   “Oh hey! I just started that season last week! Mind if I watch with you?
   I’ve got earbuds!” He smiles at me and holds out a dirty white iPod
   headset. I groan and remove my own, so I can at least avoid putting those
   filthy things into my ear.

   He takes one of the ear buds and places it in his ear, and I do the same
   with my end. We watch the last couple episodes of the season before things
   wind down to a close. I close the media player and let out a relieved
   sigh.

   “Welp, show’s over.”

   “Ooh! Can we watch something else now?”

   “Uh... What do you have in mind?” I have a pretty good feeling I am going
   to regret asking.

   “Ever since you mentioned that MLP Series finale, I’ve been dying to see
   it! If it’s as awful as you say I’m sure my daughter and I can bond while
   complaining about it!”

   Oh yeah, I definitely regret asking.

   “I’m really not in the mood to watch that show right now.”

   “Why? Because you’re afraid someone might see?” He grinned viciously,
   trying to egg me on. “Come on, after all that testosterone we just
   injected a little estrogen isn’t going to kill you.”

   “Really. Not. In the mood.”

   James leaned over until he was practically whispering in my ear. “I’ve
   been pretty patient with you, given you water, given you food, and shared
   my pipe with you. I’m practically your personal Jesus Christ, and the
   entire duration of this trip all you have been is distant. You’ve been a
   spoiled little princess. Not the way you respond to an offering of
   friendship.” He leaned back and smiled that bright smile. “So let’s just
   watch the stupid show, alright?”

   I meekly complied and started searching for it on Youtube. It didn’t take
   long, the video was pretty notorious, and I guess it was receiving a lot
   of hits lately, how coincidental.

   The video opened without the usual intro that would inspire me to grit my
   teeth, instead it was just dramatic music. Discord had arrived in the
   capital to inform Celestia that something terrible had escaped from the
   bowels of Tartarus. Bowels is not the sort of word I ever expected to hear
   from a show for little girls.

   Every time Celestia spoke I wanted to look away from the screen. She and
   her sister had been the only reason I had ever watched this stupid show.
   Episode one and two got me hooked, and everything that didn’t expand on
   their relationship was just filler to me.

   In light of that, it was very difficult for me to face what was going to
   happen next. Celestia wanted to assemble the elements of harmony, but now
   they were scattered so far apart. Things had been simple when Twilight was
   still a student in Ponyville. Now she was a princess in her own right,
   Rainbow Dash was a captain of the Wonderbolts, and Rarity had her own shop
   in downtown Canterlot, a district second in traffic only to the royal
   quarter. Applejack, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie at least still lived in
   Ponyville, but it would just take too much time to round up everypony
   individually.

           Celestia rushed off with Discord to seal this creature back where
   it belonged. Just a few moments and it was a done deal. With Discord’s
   help, she wouldn’t even need Luna.

           She wouldn’t even need Luna.

           She wouldn’t even need...

           Then of course the betrayal happened. Celestia was knocked down
   into the pit below. Discord arrived at Twilight’s room, zapped her to who
   knows where, and now for the worst part, the final confrontation with
   Princess...

           Wait, what? Why are the credits rolling?

           I grit my teeth together trying to figure out what the deal was.
   Was this some poorly conceived troll?

           “Well I don’t know what you’re complaining about! I think that was
   a great ending!” He clapped me on the shoulder. “It’s pretty daring, you
   know? A girl’s cartoon that ends with the bad guy winning? Maybe I
   misjudged that show.”

           I looked around at the related videos, and started digging through
   the comments. There had to be an answer. “Hold on, that’s not the whole
   episode, I think that one’s a joke. Let me find another one.”

           I tried a few versions of the episode, and each time it ended the
   same way. I did notice one thing of note, however. Some of the comments
   were just as pissed off as I was, and for the same reason! The unusual
   part being that everyone seemed to be inquiring about a missing scene over
   ponies that didn’t even seem relevant to the plot. Why the hell would
   Berry Punch have a final showdown in the series finale? She didn’t even
   have a voice role in the show.

           “Well, looks like you must have just misremembered something. It’s
   been five years, right? No biggie.” He sniffed and popped his headphones
   out of his pocket and plugged them into his ears. He flashed me a
   condescending smile and added. “Thanks for letting me watch. I know it was
   a big deal for you.”

           “... Sure, no problem.”

           The short remainder of the trip was awkward, he kept to himself
   and listened to his music, and I put my laptop away before listening to
   mine. We pulled into Los Angeles a bit later than expected, and because we
   were sitting behind the driver we were two of the first off the bus.

           I was beyond ecstatic to be away from him. That creep had been
   nothing but a nightmare ever since we’d met, delicious cucumbers be
   damned. If I saw him again I was going to bust the teeth right out of his
   smile. My heart rate was increasing, and I decided to make way for the
   bathroom. Maybe splashing some water against my face would calm me down.

           The bathroom was filthy, like most bus terminal bathrooms are, and
   there was an ethereal ambiance playing over the speakers. The water
   smelled awful, or at least, maybe the plumbing did? Regardless, the cool
   water went a long way to calm my nerves, and as added bonus no one was in
   there with me.

           Blessing became curse when I heard the door swing shut and click
   into place. My eyes started to go wide even before James rounded the
   corner, smiling that omnipresent smile.

           “Hey man! Traveling across the country like that was an
   experience! We should do it again sometime!” He came within arms reach of
   me.

           ‘Do it Eric. Punch him in the jaw, just do it!’

           I didn’t do anything, he just kept talking. “What’s your
   facebook?”

           “I don’t... I don’t use facebook?”

           “It’s 2020, and you don’t book face?”

           I slowly shook my head no, my expression was tortured like a child
   that had just been caught cleaning the toilet with his brother’s tooth
   brush. By his brother.

           “Well, you should really get my number, Luna.” He sneered at me
   and reached out with one hand, burying his gnarled fingers through my hair
   and into my scalp. I yelped in surprise and tried to pull back, but he
   held fast. “After all, I’ve got yours...”

           His yellow eyes sparkled malevolently and he just held me there,
   staring into my eyes. “Now little Lulu, I hope this whole experience
   hasn’t made you... uncomfortable. I’ve invested a lot of energy into
   making sure you don’t place a single hoof onto my stage. So things better
   stay that way. Kapeesh?”

           “I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, you god-damned
   nut job! I’m not Luna!”

           “Hmm? Oh, maybe not yet anyway. But you were starting to wake up
   early. You alicorns are so high maintenance, I honestly can’t stand you.”

           James made a face and delivered in a mocking tone. “It practically
   took weeks to get little miss Princess Mi Amore Cadenza out of her damn
   fortress. Why can’t all alicorns be as useless as you?”



   I winced. My heart rate started to escalate faster than ever before.
   tendrils of green and black smoke started to waft from his eyes.

           “Anyyyyyyway. Since you accepted all three of my gifts, I get to
   do this now!”

   You’ll never have the leading role!

   But don’t despair, you still have goals!

   We shared our food, our drink, our hearth!

   Perceive this darkness inside your heart!

           By the time the curse was concluded I was gasping for breath and
   clutching my chest. The black and green smoke rushed into me through my
   nose and mouth, and I struggled to stay on my feet and conscious. The last
   thing I remember saying was “But... it doesn’t even rhyme...”

           James huffed, a trail of dragon like smoke shooting from his
   mouth. “Oh Luna, don’t even start.”



           I came to when a loud angry banging echoed through the bathroom. I
   looked around wildly, I was alone. The facet I had been using was still
   spilling out into the sink, and a small folded up piece of paper was
   sitting on the counter.

           Got your number! Here’s mine: 666-2317 >:)

           I groaned and slipped the note into my pocket before shambling to
   the door. I opened it expecting security guards, instead I found a man and
   his son, who was dancing madly the dance of the rainmaker.

           He shook his head angrily and stormed in right through me. “God
   damn junkie, you’re lucky I didn’t have time to call security.”

           I did feel pretty lucky, because at that moment my bus was
   boarding, and I raced toward it like someone desperate to escape a
   nightmare.

           The trip wasn’t even in a Greyhound, it was some offshoot charter
   brand or something. There was no power and no internet, and the little
   televisions hanging from the ceiling didn’t work either. I resigned myself
   to an unpleasant ride, but consoled myself that it would at least be
   short.

           When I got to San Diego, no one was waiting for me. Which wasn’t
   surprising, I said in my email that I could get back to the house on my
   own. A couple of hours on the trolley and a few transfers later, and I had
   arrived at my childhood home just in time for dinner.

           Or I would have been if anyone was there. I wasn’t sure why the
   door was locked, I told them I’d be showing up today. With some difficulty
   I jumped high enough to grab the roof of the parking structure surrounding
   our condo. I pulled myself up, the small rocks on it’s surface digging
   into my skin. I walked around to the tiny cell that functioned as our back
   yard and leapt down into the grass. The sliding glass door was never
   locked, and getting inside was easy at that point.

           I took the time to shower, shave, brush my teeth, basically remove
   all the disgusting homeless person that had built up during my trip, and
   curled up on the couch with a book to read. My mom was the first person
   home, and her surprise was equally gratifying and insulting.

           “Oh! Hello!” She said through clenched teeth. “You’re here today!”

           I blinked at her and stood up. “Well, yeah. Didn’t you read my
   email?”

           “Oh sweety, you know I don’t check my email.”

           “I called you in advance and asked if it was okay for me to stay
   here awhile, when you said yes I told you I’d be sending you an email with
   more info about when.”

           “Yes... Well.” She stood there stiffly, a condition that only
   became worse when I tried to abandon my exasperation and hug her.

           “Well. It’s good to see you again.” I said. “Hopefully I won’t be
   here too long.”

           “Oh... No. Take as long as you need!” My mom flashed me one of her
   rehearsed smiles.

           I shook my head and went to the kitchen to start working on
   dinner. My older and younger brother, Robert and John, respectively, came
   storming in an hour later.

           Somehow they were built in the greek image of perfection, and I
   was the slight and waifish figure that provoked... well, creepy assholes
   on public buses to pinch their nipples. At least I was taller than them,
   but that didn’t stop them from abusing me. Somehow I managed to land the
   youngest sibling slot despite my seniority.

           “Hey Eric!” Robert clapped me on the back, a social gesture I wish
   could be banished to the enchanted confines of the moon. “Wasn’t expecting
   you here today! What are you making for dinner?”

           “...Soup.”

           “Can we get a little elaboration?” John chimed in.



   “It’s chicken tortilla soup.” I paused. “Robert, please get off of me.”

           Robert’s eyes went wide and he pried his hand free before waiving
   it in the air like a daring lion tamer. “As you wish your royal highness!”

           That phrase made me quake like a leaf, and I couldn’t keep it
   under wraps. For the first time since I could remember, my older brother
   looked worried about me.

   “Hey, are you okay? You didn’t catch anything did you?” Robert grabbed my
   chin, my family doesn’t really respect the concept of personal space. “You
   look like shit. Your eyes are sorta yellow.”

   I shook him off and began stirring the soup. “I’m fine! Get off of me! I
   just haven’t really slept in a few days.”

   John hated to be outdone by Robert. He grabbed the ladle from my hand and
   shoved me aside. “Then go get some rest you big idiot, we’ll handle dinner
   tonight Cinderella.”

           The faint pounding in my head that had persisted ever since that
   stop in LA came in full force. My hand shot out and wrapped around John’s
   throat like a wolf’s jaws around a rabbit’s neck. “Don’t. Call me that.” I
   used my other hand to retrieve the ladle from him. “I started dinner, I’m
   going to finish dinner. Or is that not alright with you?”

           “Uh... sure man... whatever, right?” John backed away, but Robert
   wasn’t so easily cowed.

           “You’re sure you’re alright then?” He placed a hand on John’s
   shoulder and slowly pulled him away to safety.

           ‘Yes. FINALLY some respect, I am older than that prepubescent
   little idiot, and I deserve to be treated as such!’

   I shook my head to clear it of the pounding, and let the ladle sink into
   the soup.

           “Actually, I’m not really sure.” I stammered and took a step back.
   “I think I’m going to go lay down or something.”

           “You can use my room.” Robert said, he lead me there like I had no
   idea where I was going, but thankfully avoided grabbing my hand.

           The room was just like I remembered it, stuffed with bad music
   posters and pictures of barely naked women. But at least the bed was
   clean. I curled up on the mattress without much of a fight. I couldn’t
   stop shaking. Robert held the door open for a second longer and muttered.

           “Get some sleep, alright?”

           He didn’t need to ask me a third time.

   It was all my fault, I should have been there! I should have been there!

   Where had I been instead? In bed, observing the dreams of adolescents and
   foals?! The fate of Equestria hung in the balance and Princess Luna was
   NOWHERE to be seen! That makes what, four times in a row?

   I looked around wildly, no... Not in bed, not back home. I was still in
   the moon. Still in that infernal inferior celestial object as it whirled
   around the sky at the behest of my big sister.

   I hated her. I hated her more than words could express. How could she
   choose his help over mine? It was her fault! It was her fault all of this
   had happened to us, happened to Twilight...

           I gnashed my teeth and stomped at the magical walls of my prison
   with rage-fueled vigor. The stars danced madly overhead. Celestia can move
   the sun and moon, but she wasn’t very good at manipulating the stars. Even
   I was barely capable of such.

           But they loved me, at least. Even at my worst they cared for me,
   and when the stars come right, well...

           For Five Score, Divided by Four...

           Patience is a virtue, I guess.

   I woke up in the dead of night, covered in sweat, but with a dry mouth.
   You can’t explain that, science did it. A cursory glance at the alarm
   clock informed me that it was now five in the morning, the sun would be
   rising soon. I considered going back to sleep, but in all honesty I was
   feeling absolutely disgusting. I needed a shower like never before.

   ‘No matter how hard you scrub, you’ll never be clean Luna!’ A mirth-filled
   voice echoed through my mind. I shook my head to clear my thoughts and
   padded out of the bedroom and into the full bathroom right next to it.

   The shower felt really great, and got rid of the sweat nicely, but it
   didn’t really do much to make me feel cleaner. Stupid mocking head voice.
   Why do you always know the future?

           I climbed out of the shower and began drying myself off with two
   of the only things I had left behind. I was surprised they were still
   there, actually. Two towels, one dark blue and the other black.
   Considering what I finally noticed next, they were oddly appropriate in
   colour.

           On either side of my thighs there was a small unevenly shaped
   blob, pitch black in colour. they were an odd shade of black that should
   have been impossible, with tattoo ink anyway. I ran my hand along them
   expecting to feel hair or fur or something, but there was nothing. It was
   difficult to describe really. Inside each was a small crescent white moon.
   It only took a second to realize what I was looking at, and when the penny
   dropped my mouth dropped with it.

   “Well, that wasn’t there before...”

   --------------------------------------------------------------------------

  Nightmares and Dreamscapes

           “Nopony must know of this...” I stammered while looking down at
   my exposed cutiemark. It took a second or two to realize what I had just
   said. “Ugh! This should be a dream! Why isn’t it a dream?” I dragged out
   the word dream with a childish whine that almost resulted in the nervous
   grinding of teeth.

           I turned the lights off and sat down on the closed toilet, sitting
   in the dark was often an invaluable technique for calming myself down.
   Denying my senses any input gives them less to work with, except for when
   I was feeling particularly imaginative. Right now I was a bit too
   preoccupied to start inventing nightmarish creatures that were crawling up
   the bathtub’s drain.

           The cutiemark on either of my thighs wasn’t so easily avoided
   unfortunately. It was a bit weird and... well, neat, actually. The blotch
   and the crescent moon stood out against the darkness very faintly. It was
   not at all like typical black light effects, or glow in the dark
   illumination. The light seemed unusually natural, considering the source,
   and it pulsed as though it were alive. One of my ears did its best to
   flick as I focused my attention on my shiny new cutiemark. I grabbed at it
   with both hands and yelped, silencing myself last second as much as I
   could.

           “I hate when it does that!” I growled out. “It feels so weird...”

           I released my ear and calmed down. My issues were so much bigger
   than twitchy ears, and right now it wasn’t worth the distraction. I looked
   back down at the small representations of the night sky. The soft glow was
   quickly starting to hypnotize me, and if I listened close I swore I could
   hear the soft hum of something... indistinct.

           “Ha!” I shouted a bit too loudly, given the hour. “It’s magic!”

   I had to admit, I suddenly wasn’t so bent out of shape. Real magic, and it
   wasn’t a dream! It was a motherfucking miracle. I had half a mind to paint
   myself up like a clown. And then the other foot dropped.

           ‘This is Luna’s cutiemark.’ I took another worried glance back
   down. ‘What the hay am I doing with Luna’s cutiemark?’

           Unbidden, my mind filled with the events from the previous week.
   Josh kissing my hand, the little girl on the bus, and the episode with
   James that I had soundly placed out of mind for the sake of my sanity.

           Delicate. Flower.

           I stumbled backwards and yelped. The heels of my feet had struck
   the side of the tub, and they could go no further, but the rest of me
   wasn’t so convinced. I tumbled backwards into the tub with a loud thud.

           I winced and clutched the side of my head for a few moments before
   a sharp knock on the door sounded the presence of another. “Are you
   alright in there?” I heard Robert’s gruff voice echo through the bathroom
   door.

           “Y-Yes! We are fi-” I coughed and clutched at my throat. Did...
   Did my voice just crack?

           . . . Did I just use the royal we?

           “I’m coming in.” He shoved open the door, and I mentally smacked
   myself for not opening the counter drawer as a makeshift deadbolt.

           Instead what I did was cry out and cover up my privates with a
   towel. In retrospect a pointless maneuver, it’s not like I had anything he
   hadn’t seen before, or vice versa. “Robert... I’m naked.”

           He paused in the doorway and cocked his head. “I can see that.” He
   closed the door behind him and then flicked on the bathroom lights. The
   light was almost blinding after my long sit in the dark. I closed my eyes
   defensively and pulled back.

           “Jeez Eric, got yourself some nice tattoos there.” When I opened
   my eyes he was hunched over by the side of the tub, and was poking
   my cutiemark experimentally.

           I swatted at his hand nervously while using my spare to hide
   behind the towel. “What are you doing?! Stop that!” I recoiled further
   into the tub and winced when the cold metal of the facet grazed my back.
   “It’s not a tattoo...” I whimpered.

           “Are you sure?” That old big brother tone entered his voice and
   his lips curled into an expression of knowing mirth. “Because it looks
   like you tattoo’d Luna’s cutiemark onto your butt.” He clasped his hands
   together and laughed out. “Oh Eric, now you really are a princess!”

           I don’t know what I was thinking. My heart rate was sky high, so I
   guess that’s evidence toward the conclusion that I hadn’t. My hand sailed
   out and collided with his face, the echo from the slap was almost
   deafening as it ricocheted off the walls. In the aftermath, I was
   hyperventilating with my hand outstretched, and Robert’s face was red like
   the inside of a plum. It was obvious there was going to be a bruise. He
   clutched the side of his face with a pained expression.

   I gathered my senses, and upon recognizing my extremely effeminate
   position I yelped and curled inward, wrapping the towel completely around
   myself. “Not a tattoo...” I mumbled out before purposefully avoiding his
   gaze.

           “Relax Eric, I know that. I was just teasing you.” Robert rubbed
   at his jaw. “You should really stick to slapping, they’re way worse than
   your punches.”

           I ignored his last statement. “How can you tell?”

           “That it’s not a tattoo?”

           I nodded quietly.

           Robert reached over and pulled back the left sleeve of his shirt,
   around his arm was a band of ink for every year he’d been alive. I didn’t
   need to count to know there was 31 of them, and pretty soon there would be
   32. The closer they got to the base of the wrist the more faded they
   appeared. The first 18 must have been done at once, because they all had
   the same faded greenish black colour.

           “Because that is what a real tattoo looks like.” He stated matter
   of factly. “Whatever you’ve got going there, it looks like a birthmark,
   but... It’s like someone painted it on.” He shook his head in disbelief.
   “You’re not going to get a white moon that is that unblemished at a tattoo
   parlor. Unless you found someone who has perfected mysterious techniques
   from the exotic orient.”

           “It’s a cutiemark...” I half whispered to myself.

           Robert beamed down at me. “It sure looks like it!” He walked over
   to the sink and wet a rag with cold water before applying it to his face.
   “So how’d you get it?”

           “I had a nightmare, so I decided to take a shower.” I exaggerated
   a shrug enough for the gesture to be visible through the towel. “I just
   woke up with it, this morning.”

           “This morning, huh?”

           Once again, I nodded.

           “Well, happy birthday I suppose.” He reached his hand into his
   back pocket and dug out a small orangish-brown envelope before tossing it
   to me. I stretched my hands out from under the towel and caught it.

           “What is this?”

           “It’s your birthday present.”

           “But... why? You didn’t even know I was going to be here
   yesterday.” I looked down and started scrutinizing it carefully, ready for
   a prank.

           “Read the envelope Eric... I was going to mail it today.”

           Sure enough the package had my old address in Wisconsin on it.

           “Go ahead, open it.” He sat Indian-style against the bathroom door
   and leaned into it, clutching the cold rag to his face.

           It wasn’t that difficult to open, though I did end up resorting to
   my teeth. I guess in my emotional state I lost quite a bit of my
   dexterity, because I kept fumbling with my hands. With a slow rip I tore
   at one of the ends. I gently tapped the side of it against the towel and
   the contents fell out onto the relatively yielding safety of the material,
   instead of the hard surface of the tub. The first object I noticed was a
   necklace. It was hard to miss with the large dark blue crystal perched in
   the center. The crystal was held in place by the most amazing
   wire-wrapping job ever. It was elegant in a sort of dark way, possessed of
   both sharp edges and graceful curves. It wasn’t like anything I’d ever
   seen in some jewelry shop.

           “Robert... How did you get this?”

           “DeviantArt, 200 dollars.”

           “You bought me a necklace off DeviantArt?” I raised a brow at him.

           He winced at the quickly developing bruise. “Hey, if you don’t
   want it, I’ll wear it.”

           “No No! I want it, it’s just...” I looked down at the necklace and
   folded my fingers around the pendent. “Thanks...”

           I reached down and picked up the second object, which was a
   letter. It was handwritten ink on blank white printer paper. It was also
   unevenly folded, but I always had a hard time with that myself.

   Hey Eric

   I know we didn’t get along very well growing up. But I just wanted to
   write you for your birthday and tell you how proud I am of you. This is
   your first birthday way from home, right? You finally got out man, and I
   think thats great!

   You seem to really like shiny things, and this made me think of you. I
   hope you don’t mind that it’s basically jewelry, I know how sensitive you
   can be about your masculinity (Or lack thereof! Ha!)

   Happy Birthday

   Robert

           I folded the letter up and slipped it back into the envelope.
   “Thank you...” I fiddled with the chain of the necklace a bit. “It was
   very thoughtful, we appreciate your gift.”

           Eric snickered, and I clapped a hand over my mouth.

           “We, huh?”

           “Robert! You can’t tell anyone about the...” My voice talespinned
   into a squeaky whisper. “Cutiemark...”

           “Hey, don’t worry Luna.” He stated mockingly. “I won’t tell
   anyone, it’ll be our little secret.”

           I ignored his teasing and stood up. I bent over and snatched up
   the extra towel, draping it over my shoulders. The first towel was wrapped
   around my waist, so most of my figure was now obfuscated enough to suit my
   nerves. “Thank you.”

           “Don’t mention it.” He stood up. “If anyone asks, I slipped and
   fell into the doorknob.”

           “If anyone asks, I fell in the shower, and my voice did not
   crack.”

           He held out a hand and we shook on it. “Deal.”

           I climbed out of the tub and yawned. “I should get some more
   sleep.”

           Robert nodded and opened the bathroom door. “After you milady.” He
   held his hand out like some kind of manservant.

           I was about to become my usual indignant self, but a flash of heat
   from my thighs interrupted me, and instead of yelling at him I merely
   huffed. “We are more than prepared to strike thee a second time.”

           Robert looked incredibly confused by the archaic speech, but he
   stood up straight and stopped with the charade.

           “Much better.” I replied, and stepped proudly out of the bathroom
   and back into the bedroom.

           When the door closed behind me I fell back against it. The wave of
   heat dissipated and I was feeling absolutely frigid all of a sudden. I
   slid down until I was sprawled out on my rear, a detail that only reminded
   me of the mark I now shared with a certain cartoon horse. I closed my eyes
   and ran a tense hand through my hair.

           What the hell was happening to me? Why was I speaking so
   strangely? Why was I acting this way? I felt like an absolute stranger to
   myself. Am I going to start speaking in caps-lock soon? As abrupt as some
   of the changes in personality were, it was getting very hard to tell where
   Luna began and I ended.

           ‘Assuming there is any difference at all.’ I thought bitterly.

           My other hand was still holding the necklace my brother had given
   me, and I stared at it. It glinted in the soft light of near-dawn, and
   scattered the light around pleasantly. It really was beautiful.

           ‘I bet it will match my coat quite well. Tia will be so jealous!’

           My eyes widened.

           Ah ha, yeah... No. We’re going back to sleep now.

           I mean I am going back to sleep now!

           With a frustrated sob I picked myself up and stepped lightly to
   the bed. A cold feeling in my chest was still spreading out through my
   veins and making me shiver, so when I collapsed onto it I scooped up all
   of the blankets and bundled myself in them tightly.

   The insulation from the blankets didn’t seem to do much besides trap the
   cold in. I thrashed about a bit trying to get warm before finally giving
   up and curling up into a ball with my back against the wall. It felt like
   icy fingers were wrapping themselves around my heart, and I wasn’t sure
   how I was going to cope.

           As I got myself situated however, a gentle pulse of warmth
   resonated from where my new cutiemark was located. It did a pretty good
   job of driving off most of the cold, though it remained particularly bad
   in my chest. I couldn’t really help myself at that point, I murmured
   happily and reveled in the feelings sweeping through my body.

           Sure, everything was changing, and this was my body. My
   precious body. But isn’t change what I was looking for in the first place
   when I left home all those months ago? The mental changes were especially
   frightening still, but all of this still felt... really nice!

           I drifted off to sleep then. The warmth filling my body continued
   to battle that invasive coldness. Those twin sensations ushered me into
   sleep together.

           I’ll never understand why people claim you can’t dream in colour,
   or read in your dreams. If anything colours were exaggerated in my dreams.
   Reading was as simple as noting the address and names on the side of the
   mailboxes, and based on those, I wasn’t too far from my father’s house. I
   probably could have left if I wanted to, but the natural gravity provided
   by the dream’s intensity pulled me forward, and I didn’t see a reason to
   fight back. The secret to relaxation in the dreamlands is to just go with
   the flow.

           For the most part, anyway.

           My father and mother divorced early on after my younger brother
   had been born. He was a bit of a lecherous pig, and I didn’t really enjoy
   his company much anyway. He always hollered after women or acted like some
   kind of stud whenever I was around. It’s the same way he acted around guys
   in general, really, and it was as though I was expected to find him
   cool for this behavior. He was trying to earn my respect, and that was his
   first step towards losing it.

           I had an older sister from before he met my mother, and he never
   acted that way around her. He acted like... Well, what I hope qualifies
   for himself. He would never act that way around me, and I always resented
   him for that. Her as well, but since I never interacted with her it was
   hardly an issue that ever came up.

           That soft and gentle inertia led me to the front yard of his
   house. The grass was well kept and there was a large tree for shade, as
   well as a trampoline. Dad met an overweight singer at his local church,
   and she was desperate to get married and have kids. I guess her biological
   clock was running out and such. She had rich parent, so.Dad made out like
   a bandit. She was so grateful that she didn’t even care about his
   wandering eyes, or hands.

           The picket fence was gone. That was new, I certainly didn't
   remember that from the last time I visited. Around the perimeter of the
   yard were long wooden stakes with wire stretched in a hexagonal pattern
   around them. On the other side of the wire was a thick brown cardboard,
   like when you get those little tubes of biscuit dough for dinner. While
   scrutinizing the layout an understand dawned on me. He was replacing his
   old picket fence with a wall.

           That gravity began tugging at me once more, and I knew I had to
   find my father. At this time of day I assumed he would be in the backyard
   working on his garden. So I rounded the house and made my way towards it.

           When I dream, I make a game of noticing the interesting
   incongruencies. To veer on a Jungian tangent, dreams are intuition based,
   and less sensing based. This might account for why people claim you cannot
   read or see in colour in dreams... But that’s a thought exercise for
   another time.

   The first thing I noticed about this dream was that everything ‘was much
   larger than it should have been. The stakes went up to my shoulders,
   instead of my waist. The house towered like a castle, and I could even
   make out a pennant flying high at the top. When I finally reached the
   garden the vegetables had received the same treatment. The pumpkins were
   as big as carriages, and the the heads of lettuce were as big as cardboard
   boxes.

           “Eric?” I heard my father’s voice call out in an angry and
   confused tone.

   So, It was one of those dreams.

           I turned around to face him. My father was always a big man. He
   worked for a moving company for most of his life, and never cut his hair,
   and in this dream his size was also exaggerated. He looked like a towering
   barbarian king come to demand his offering of slaves.

           “What are you doing standing around? Get back to work!” He tossed
   a shovel at me, expecting me to catch it. I calmly stepped to the side,
   and it clattered to the ground by my feet. My only response was a smirk.

           His jaw went slack, and his face turned red. “What are you doing?
   Pick up that shovel!”



           “Yeah, I just don’t think that’s going to happen.” I looked down
   at the shovel and spat at it. “Sorry pops, no free labor today!”

           He marched the rest of the distance between us and thrust a finger
   against my chest. The waves of anger tugged and twisted at the dream,
   disturbing the flow and amping up the intensity. Things were getting out
   of hand. If they continued, the gravity would likely be too strong for me
   to fight against. I’d find myself in a nightmare, and those are unpleasant
   on the best of nights.

           I acted on instinct, even I do that in dreams on occasion. I
   shoved the towering man back with unexpected strength. When he stepped
   back his face was a blistering beet red, and he swung at me. I ducked
   beneath the blow and scooped up the shovel by the handle in one movement,
   then rolled around his side and behind him with the next. Before he could
   recover from his attempted haymaker I brought the metal end of the shovel
   down on his head, hard.

           With a crack that echoed through the dream he collapsed onto the
   ground in a heap. I lifted the shovel high into the air and prepared to
   stab it down like a spear right into his back, but before I could complete
   the movement a voice called out to me.

           “Stop!”

           I took one of my hands off the handle and lowered the shovel to my
   side. Standing by my father’s side was one of his newer kids. Jordan, I
   think this one’s name was. Jordan was the oldest from what I remember
   anyway. He stood by my father's crumpled body and his slingshot was drawn
   like he was David fighting Goliath. If this were anyone else’s dream I’d
   feel like I interrupted something important, but since that was obviously
   impossible, and this was mine, I couldn’t help but feel like I was meant
   to be upstaged again.

           By a kid with a slingshot.

           “You step away from my father!” He bellowed.

           “You step away from mine!”

           Jordan shook his head with an expression of righteous anger. “He’s
   not your father! Stop pretending to be Eric!”

           “What the hell are you talking about? Of course I’m Eric! Now get
   out of the way while I finish this stupid dream!”

           Jordan pulled the cord on his slingshot back a bit further. “It’s
   not a dream, it’s a nightmare, and you’re not Eric. Eric doesn’t have eyes
   like that.”

           “What?”

           “Eric has brown eyes, yours aren’t even human.” He spat at me.
   “They’re weird and funny looking, like a demon’s!”

           I felt a sharp icey stab of pain in my thighs, and pulled the
   waist of my pants out so I could look down and see what the matter was.

           That’s weird, when did I get Luna’s cutiemark?

   It was pulsing too, fading from a dark purple to pitch black. The purple
   light was almost malevolent, and my mind immediately drew a comparison to
   cancer. I looked around wildly for something to serve as a mirror, and the
   dream provided.

   I tossed the shovel to the side and walked down to the back yard’s
   driveway. The gravel had come loose here, and there was a large puddle of
   water in the indent. It functioned perfectly as a mirror, and I bent down
   to get a good look at my reflection.

           Jordan was right, my eyes did look weird. They were a vibrant
   glowing turquoise, and had a narrow slit for a pupil. It was extremely
   disconcerting, and somehow they brought up memories I couldn’t quite put
   into context. They filled me with terror, that was key. Something very
   very bad was happening to me.

           I took a step back from the pool of water, and turned around to
   face Jordan. Instead I saw my father back on his feet. He had the shovel
   from earlier and was winding it back with both hands. I didn’t even hear
   the impact as it smashed into my face.

           Bad end, I guess.

           I tried to gasp out for breath when I woke up, but it had been too
   abrupt. Already I could barely remember what had happened, and traces of
   memory were ransacked by the creeping feeling of dread that came with
   sleep paralysis. I needed to move! I needed to breathe! Both were denied
   to me, and I started to whimper in my own mind as shadows in the room
   crept and moved about. At least the terror was alleviated a bit by the
   rays of sunlight sweeping into the room. If this were my night, my
   punishment for swift departure from sleep would be quite a bit steeper.

   Unable to move, unable to breathe, imprisoned in my own body... Just like
   being imprisoned in the moon.

           Warmth filled me again, and I started to regain the feeling in my
   legs. I kicked and thrashed to exercise my reclaimed freedom.

   I sat up straight and shivered. I’ve never been in any moon. What was
   wrong with me? I peeked down my pajamas and sighed with relief. My
   cutiemark was black with a white moon. Black, not purple. Why was I so
   relieved to see that?

           I made my way into the bathroom and cranked on the facet. I cupped
   my hands under the stream and splashed my face with soothing warm water,
   then took a good long look in the mirror. There was no sign of stubble or
   shadow, none at all. The skin was pale, and I couldn’t help but notice
   that my face looked a bit more feminine somehow. It seemed overnight I had
   lost the need to shave, and also acquired some crazy eyelashes. My eyes
   were still brown at least, so no changes there. I peeked down at my
   cutiemark again and sighed.

           ‘It’s going to be time to get a legal name change soon, Eric. At
   least you’ve always liked the name Luna. You could have ended up as her
   sister, right?’

           My towels weren’t in the bathroom anymore, so I went back into
   Robert’s room before drying off my face. My bag filled with clothing was
   still laying on its side in the center of the room, so I picked it up and
   spilled the contents out onto the floor. There was nothing in there but
   clothes and a few grooming items: an electric razor, a bottle of skin
   cleanser, and a bottle of toner.

           Look, the first step to maintaining health is prevention. If I was
   going to age I was going to age gracefully damn it. My mom and dad were in
   their 50s, and I’ve seen what waits for me otherwise.

           ‘You’re turning into an immortal princess of the night, remember?
   Age is a thing of the past! Always look on the bright side of life!’

           I sorted through the clothing until I found a pair of jeans. Not
   my favorite pair, but they were the first thing I spotted so I put them
   on.

           Strangely, putting them on was a bit of a chore, but it wasn’t
   like I had gained any weight. If anything I had lost a few pounds while on
   the road. I struggled briefly getting them up and over my thighs, and when
   they were on they didn’t fit right at all. They were too tight in some
   places, and too loose in others. What was even weirder was that they were
   too long. While walking around I would repeatedly catch my heel on the
   bottom of the pant leg. The last time I had worn them they stopped at my
   ankle.

           I slipped them off with a bit less effort and tried the next pair,
   but experienced the same problem as before. I went through my entire pile
   of clothing and experienced more of the same, for the most part. Some
   investigation with the mirror helped me realize that not only did I have a
   shiny new cutiemark, I now had prominent hips as well.

           A cutiemark belonging to some princess from a cartoon show had
   been relatively easy to handle, back when it didn't include the
   unfortunate side effect of turning into a girl too. I really need to
   figure out my priorities here. Am I upset because I’m turning into Luna,
   or am I upset because I’m switching teams?

           I tossed my pants back into the duffle bag and put my pajamas back
   on. Glorious PJs, you are a source of hope for fat people and TF victims
   the world over.

   By the time I finished cleaning up after myself a loud bang came from the
   doorway. Robert flung open the door to the bedroom with John hounding him
   from behind. He dashed inside with a plate of eggs and a cup of orange
   juice, then slammed the door in John’s face.

           “What are you two doing in there? What new conspiracy are you
   hatching?!” John shouted through the door.

           “Keep at it, and I’m gonna show ya!” Robert called back. The
   sounds at the door stopped.

   Robert sighed and placed the plate and cup down in front of me. He then
   marched over to the door and swung it open. John tumbled forward onto his
   face, as his ear had been placed against the door.

           “Seriously, I want some privacy with Eric. We spend enough time
   together.” John looked like he was a dog being abused. “We’ll hang out
   later today, okay? Whatever you want to do.”

           John nodded meekly and trudged off for his own bedroom. Robert
   closed the door gently before turning around to face me.

           “I thought you could use some breakfast. Figured you’d be up, or
   that you’d better be, it’s nearly noon.”

   I took a forkful of cold eggs and chewed them quietly. “Thanks.”



           “So... Anything new?” He asked covertly, though we both knew what
   he meant.

           I gulped down the eggs and took a large swig of OJ. I hesitated
   before deciding to tell him. “I haven’t shaved since the middle of the day
   yesterday, and my pants don’t fit anymore.” I shifted uncomfortably. “They
   don’t fit right.” I amended.

           Robert beamed like a saint on the day of his canonization. “My
   last girlfriend left some of her clothes here, you can try on some of her
   jeans!”

           “Not very funny.” I hungrily finished my eggs in between words.

           “I was being serious...” He fished out a pair from the closet and
   tossed them on the ground beside me. “They’re nothing excessive or
   anything. Any skater would love to snag a pair.”

           He was right, they were pretty tame as far as jeans go. There was
   a bit more to my reluctance though. Wearing clothing tailored for a girl
   would be giving in! It would be letting... whatever is happening, win!

           “Look, just try them on, if you don’t like them you don’t need to
   wear them.”

           I grumbled, huffed, and made a show of being miserable, but in the
   end I still picked up the pair of pants. Robert just kept staring at me,
   and I looked up at him. “Do you mind?”

           “Not at all. Please continue.”

           I glared in reply. “Turn around. Or leave the room, I do not care
   which.”

           Robert rolled his eyes and turned around to face the closet doors.
   It took me a moment to realize they doubled as mirrors, and that making
   him turn around changed nothing. I growled out angrily and pulled off my
   pajamas before slipping into the jeans.

           As it turns out the jeans were a perfect fit. Robert turned around
   and raised a brow after looking me over. “Uh... Yeah. You definitely
   weren’t like that last night. By which I mean... this morning.”

           I pulled off the jeans in frustration and slipped back into my PJs
   before collapsing backwards onto his bed. “I don’t know what’s going on!”

           Robert took a seat next to me and placed a hand on my shoulder,
   and for once in my life I actually didn't mind being physically close to
   someone. I curled up and pulled a bit closer in response.

           “I know what’s happening.” He smiled down at me.

           “Y-You do?”

           “Yes! You’re blossoming into a beautiful young woman! It took you
   long enough.”

           Robert snickered as I yelled out angrily and rolled over to shove
   him off the bed. “Joking! I’m joking! Don’t worry,  I’m sure there has to
   be an explanation for this!”

           He pulled out the chair to his desk and took a seat before booting
   up his PC. I was content to glower at him from the bed while he did his
   thing. His desktop was nothing but a black screen, as evidently his copy
   of windows was ‘not genuine’. Aside from that it was immaculate and clear
   of icons.

           Occasionally he’d ask for any suggestions when it came to where to
   look for other cases, and I’d bitterly call out some brony community that
   I wish I didn’t know about. We went back and forth like this for an hour,
   and didn’t find anything.

           “Fuck it!” Robert called out in frustration. “If someone needs to
   be OP, it may as well be us!”

           He brought up Twitter and mused loudly. “I don’t really want to
   use my twitter account for this, do you have one?”

           I scoffed at him. “Of course I do not have a Twitter account, I
   thought you were my brother.”

           Robert repeated what I said in a mocking tone. “Of course I don’t
   have a Twitter! My name’s Eric and I’m too high and mighty to use facebook
   or other social networking sites!”

           I scrunched up my face at him as best I could. “Just make a new
   account or something.”

           “Good idea!” He snickered. “Lets see, we will name it ‘mlp4evar’!”
   He found this name hilarious. I found it retarded.

           “You’re never going to get any bites with a name like that!”

           “Just watch me.”

           He spent a few moments setting up the account, and then another
   minute typing up the message, which read as follows:

   Woke up with a Cutie Mark today!

   I’m confused, but happy!

   #mlp #bizarre

           “So what do you think?” He pulled away so I could see from the
   bed.

           “I think it looks like a child wrote it.”

           “Perfect!” He grinned before clicking the submission button.

           I rolled my eyes and got up off the bed. “So what do we do now?”

           Robert shrugged and got out of his chair. “Relax? It’s your
   birthday. That’s what you do on your birthday. Arcane symbols plastered to
   your rear be damned.” He moved over to the door to open it, but didn’t
   wait for me to leave first this time.

           As it happened, by the time we finished screwing around in his
   room it was just after noon. Mom had gone to work hours ago, and John was
   busy sulking in his room. Robert got to work cleaning up the kitchen, and
   I timidly followed behind him.

           “You can use my room until we figure all of this out.” He said
   while tossing the dishes into the dishwasher haphazardly.

           “Really?” I froze in my tracks. No one in my family had ever
   really given me anything, or really gone out of their way to take care of
   me really. I couldn’t help but think about the letter that I had received
   with the necklace I was currently wearing. My hand instinctively reached
   up for the pendant to hold on to, and I was flooded with that by now
   familiar warm feeling. “Thanks... That actually means a lot to us... me!
   It means a lot to me!”

           Robert laughed and shook his head before wiping his hands off on a
   dish towel. “Don’t mention it. Sleeping on the couch for awhile isn’t
   going to kill me.” He walked over to the fridge and removed his keys from
   a magnet. “Unfortunately, I have class today. So you’re going to have to
   spend your birthday with John.”

           I grimaced, but nodded my understanding. “I am sure I will be
   fine. Thanks for everything, again.”

           He smiled from the doorway and gave a little mock bow, then spun
   on his heel and marched out the door.

           I was alone.

           In my absence the family had acquired one of those huge
   wall-mounted HD Television sets. Channel surfing didn’t reveal anything of
   real interest, so I switched it to Chiller and pulled out my laptop. As
   always, Skype was open as soon as I unlocked my user account.

           The first thing I noticed was somewhere in the ballpark of 87
   missed messages from Josh. This was unsettling, because even he is not
   normally that energetic. I skimmed through most of them and went to the
   bottom. It was mostly just him randomly asking if I was invisible or
   something with varying degrees of urgency. Since he was still online I
   decided to figure out what was so important.

           Wintermute: How can I help you?

           Nightwatch: Guess what?

           Nightwatch stands at attention, eagerly awaiting your guess!

           Wintermute: Uh...

           Wintermute: You woke up with somepony’s cutie mark, you don’t need
   to shave anymore, and your pants no longer fit properly?

           Nightwatch: =O

           Nightwatch: You’re right!

           Nightwatch: Well, half right. My hair is also turning dark blue,
   and my eyes are fuschia.

           Nightwatch: Also, they look kinda weird, like a cat’s!

           Nightwatch: Or...

           Wintermute: Or that OC you stole, you mean?

           Nightwatch: I didn’t steal it! I just think she looks cool is all.

           Nightwatch: Anyway, how did you know? I can’t find anything about
   it on the internet.

           Nightwatch: . . . Who’s cutie mark did you wake up with?

           Wintermute: …

           Nightwatch: Well?

           Wintermute: Luna’s. My hair and eyes are still perfectly normal,
   though.

           Nightwatch: I knew it! I knew there was a reason for everything!

           Nightwatch: Now I know why I got all of those feeling about you
   when you were staying with me!

   Nightwatch: It all makes sense! You really ‘are’ a princess! And I’m one
   of your royal guards! This is so exciting! Aren’t you excited?

           Wintermute: Hold on.

           Wintermute: I am not Princess Luna, and you are not some random
   Nightguard.

           Nightwatch: That sure doesn’t seem to be the case!

           Nightwatch: Don’t you remember Season 5? The finale?

           Wintermute: I try not to. It sucks.

           Nightwatch: Discord sent everypony to Earth! It all makes sense! I
   even had a dream!

           Nightwatch: For Five Score, Divided by Four! That’s 25! And we
   both just turned 25!



           A bit of what Josh was telling me was starting to take root. It
   ‘does’ make a certain kind of sense. Something about all of this is
   reminding me of the bus ride to San Diego, and my mind wanders to the
   fake phone number in the pocket of my jeans.

           Wintermute: Lets say I believe you. I’m still Eric. Maybe I ‘like’
   being Eric. I don’t want to be Princess Luna, and I don’t plan on being
   her even if my body changes to look like hers!

           Nightwatch: Oh don’t be ridiculous. You don’t like being Eric.
   That’s why you ran across the country.

           Nightwatch: And you never stopped being her. You just forgot you
   were her.

           Nightwatch: Heck, I bet if you look back on your childhood in this
   context, it all starts to make a lot more sense! Mine certainly does, and
   there isn’t even a canon personality for Nightwatch!

           I squirmed uncomfortably on the couch and ran a hand through my
   hair. I briefly considered how long I had before it was a swaying mass of
   magic, but was interrupted by a knock at the door, and the soft sound of
   something being dropped at my doorstep.

           Wintermute: I just got a package. I’ll be back in a bit.

           Nightwatch raises her hoof proudly in a salute.

           Nightwatch: talk to you in a bit Princess!



           I issued an exasperated sigh and walked over to the door, opening
   it with all the weary anxiety of someone who is apparently a long lost
   princess of a magical land far away. There is no one there, just a small
   brown box. It’s postmarked from last week and is addressed to me, so I
   pick it up and take it inside.

           I flipped the box around a bit and found a return address:

   James Concord

   16132 Everfree Ln

   Los Angeles, CA XXXXX

           Well isn’t that just a sterling endorsement? I tossed it to the
   couch across from me and stared at it like the possible explosive that it
   was. Eventually my curiosity won out, and I crossed the distance. I took
   the box in both hands and tore it open with alarming speed. Something soft
   tumbled out onto the couch, followed by a piece of paper that drifted
   lazily to the cushion beside it.

           It was a Nightmare Moon plushie. A really good one, too. A jolt of
   cold ran through my veins and I turn to my laptop.

           Wintermute: Look I need to go, right now.

           Nightwatch: Are you okay?!

           Nightwatch: Please tell me you’re okay, I’d never forgive myself
   for letting you leave!

           I don’t stick around to read what he or she is saying. I close the
   lid to my laptop, grab the Nightmare Moon plushie, and squeeze them
   together under one arm. I only just remember the note that tumbled out as
   well, and storm back into Robert’s room.

           I snatched up the plush from under my arm and flung it at the bed
   across the room from me, then set my laptop down on the desk beside
   Robert’s keyboard. With the note clenched firmly in my left hand I slid
   down onto all fours and then fell back onto the floor. I stared at it for
   a few minutes, breathing loudly and trying to get my heart rate under
   control, then I finally begin to unfold it.

   Dearest Luna,

   Birthdays are a wonderful time to reflect on the past, and prepare for the
   future, don’t you think?

   XOXO

   Discord

           Tears began to stream down my face, and I held a hand up to my
   mouth to stifle any sobs. Why is such a short stupid letter affecting me
   like this? I am not Luna!

           I crumpled up the note and threw it away from me.

           “I am not Luna...”

           The tears continued to well up in rebellion. I curled up against
   the desk, fighting to reclaim my composure. Eventually I gave up and
   pulled myself over to the the bed. After burrowing under the sheets I
   reached out for the Nightmare Moon plushie. It made me feel terrible just
   to look at it, it’s a reminder of what is happening to me. It’s reminding
   me of a past I just don’t want. How could anyone want it? And yet, it’s
   comforting. It’s very soft, and oddly cool to the touch, It reminds me of
   the moon.

           Just like the moon.

           My body is wracked with sobs and I clutch the little toy tighter.
   I can’t stop thinking about what that little girl said, what Sarah said to
   me.

           “Your sister hasn’t given up on you! So you can’t give up on her!”

           With those words in mind, I drift into a thankfully dreamless
   sleep.

           I woke up a couple of hours later and frantically checked my hair
   in the mirror. It still looked the same, but I guess it could be a little
   longer? I shrugged and decided to count my blessings. Eyes still look
   normal as well, as added bonus.

   I still have the Nightmare Moon plush squeezed in under one arm. It really
   is a neat little thing. From anyone else it would be a thoughtful birthday
   gift. I always admired how Nightmare Moon looked. She was way more
   beautiful than Princess Luna, especially the way Luna looked in season
   one. That was just...

           ‘Pathetic.’ was the first word that sprang to mind. Nightmare Moon
   was definitely cooler, not to mention more mature, and adult. I shook my
   head vigorously and cleared my thoughts.

           What the hell is wrong with me? Nightmare Moon is a villain, and
   that helmet looked retarded! Besides, I matured just fine on my own by
   season two.

           'Really? Thinking of ourselves as Luna now?' I lowered my head
   sadly and placed the plush on top of the pillow.

           Well, I left Josh pretty abruptly, so maybe I should inform him of
   my well-being. No reason why I can’t do that from Robert’s computer. I
   took a seat in the chair and got to work.

           Wintermute: Hey.

           Wintermute: I just wanted to say everything is fine. I got a
   Nightmare Moon plushie in the mail and decided to go think about stuff.

           Nightwatch: How disgustingly thoughtless!

           Nightwatch: Does it have a return address? Are you alright?

   Wintermute: I am fine. No, there does not appear to be a return address.

     Wintermute: In any case it is remarkably well made, and I am pleased
   with it.

   Nightwatch: Really?

   Nightwatch: You’re pleased with it?

   Nightwatch: But you’re... you know. Luna.

   Wintermute: Yes, well. I remain unconvinced.

   Wintermute: NotALuna.

           For once, Nightwatch... I mean Josh, seemed at a loss for words. I
   took the opportunity to browse the web for awhile,  and noticed the page
   was still open to Robert’s fake twitter account. It already had a reply.

   FionaS

   Hi!

   If it’s not too much trouble... Would you be willing to elaborate?

   #cutiemark #mlp

           My face flushed red with embarrassment and I snatched up Robert’s
   keyboard. I typed out furiously and perhaps with more shame than was
   necessary.

   mlp4eva

   Sorry! Just a prank intended for a friend! Really Sorry!



   I felt pretty guilty lying like that, but I was feeling very paranoid all
   of a sudden. And despite all the blushing, unusually cold. What if she
   needed help? What if she was like me, or Josh?

           It didn’t matter, right now what mattered was finding answers for
   myself. I did a routine search on all of the websites we checked earlier,
   but didn’t find anything of note. If other people were speaking out I was
   too incompetent to find them. I sighed and shoved the keyboard away.
   Twirling about in the chair managed to amuse me for awhile, but after a
   time I grew bored, and noticed that I was actually quite exhausted, in
   spite of the nap I just had.

           It was the middle of the day, why the hell would I be exhausted?
   Oh, right. Because I am Princess Luna, apparently.

           I fought pretty hard to maintain my diurnal freedom. I browsed the
   web for silly things, I tried to kick back and watch a movie, but nothing
   was nearly as appealing as getting some more sleep. With a bitter yawn of
   defeat I crawled back into bed, hugged my Nightmare Moon plush close, and
   curled up on my belly. I didn’t even need to put a sheet up over the
   window like usual. The strong presence of daylight had an almost soporific
   effect that soothed and lulled me to sleep the way pitch darkness used to
   back when I was...

           What? When I was human? I’ve still got my fingers and toes. I
   haven’t given up my humanity just yet.

           Robert was right though. Birthdays are for relaxing, and that’s
   just what I was going to try and do now.

           It was hot down here. It was hot and smelled incredibly
   unpleasant. I looked around to get a better understanding of myself and my
   setting, but it was hard to make a guess. I was standing in a pretty
   non-descript rock tunnel. It was well lit, despite the lack of a light
   source, but dreams did not always have to make linear sense. Intuitive,
   not Sensing again. The area was bright because it was a place that
   wanted you to see. In these subterranean confines, that did a lot to
   unnerve me.

   I walked forward on two conspicuously human feet, and I wasn’t sure if I
   was happy or sad over it. I still had my Nightmare Moon plush with me, and
   that seemed perfectly reasonable.

   I don't really experience them very often, but occasionally I'll have a
   dream where I somehow know the meaning to life, the universe, and
   everything. I don't usually remember much when I wake up, I just get the
   feeling I lost my grip on years of information. This was shaping up to be
   one of those dreams, and I was already starting to feel drunk and not
   myself.

   Although the place was well lit, and wanted me to see things, they were
   not without their own shadows, and I made use of them whenever necessary.
   I guess down here the monsters didn't need to hide in the darkness. A word
   for the place tickled at the back of my mind, and I dove deeper and deeper
   into those passages. After all, it was merely a dream, and I am not afraid
   of dreams.

   I am in my element as it were.

           I finally came to a large antechamber in the bowels of the system,
   and what I saw in the center shocked me.

           “Sister!” I cried out, but it was Luna’s voice, not mine, that I
   heard.

           The regal white form was wreathed in black iron chains that dug
   into her coat and left faint burns and blisters everywhere. It looked like
   she hadn’t moved for years, but she stirred when she heard my voice.

           “Luna?!” Her own cry responded to mine, filled with hope. She
   turned her head as much as she could and I gazed into her large pink eyes.

   I could see my reflection in them. I was still human, still Eric. Only my
   eyes and frame were different. Celestia looked noticeably crestfallen when
   she saw me, and much of her hopefulness evaporated.

           “What happened to you Luna?” Tears started to well up in her eyes,
   before streaming down her face and splashing to the ground. The hungry
   nature of the place drank them greedily, and seemed to glow brighter for
   it.

           I placed a hand on her side and she winced, like she was afraid of
   me. I couldn’t help but notice how her eyes lingered on my little
   Nightmare doll. I pulled my hand away sadly.

           I paused for a moment, trying to think of how I should reply.
   “Discord happened to me. To us.” I looked at the ground to hide my immense
   guilt. “He did the same to Twilight Sparkle. He caught me before I was
   even finished waking up.”

           We were both quiet for awhile, though I think Celestia’s silence
   was due to her state. It looked painful to even breathe with all those
   chains wrapped around her.

           “We’re in Tartarus, aren’t we?”

           “Yes,” Celestia croaked weakly. “Discord happened to me too.”

           “Yes, I saw the episode.” I muttered, falling to my knees beside
   her.

           “What?”

           “... I will explain some other time. You must be dreaming, I can
   help you get out of here.”

           My sister’s tears finally stopped and she shook her head,
   grimacing with the effort. “You cannot help me.”

           “Of course I can! We are dreaming, I am unstoppable here!”

           “Luna! You cannot help me. You cannot even help yourself...”
   Celestia coughed weakly. “You are not yourself right now. Not in body, not
   in mind, and certainly not in spirit.”

           “So what am I supposed to do then? Just leave you here? I will
   not!”

           “Luna, even if you stole me away with you, my body is still here.
   There is nothing you can do about that.” She paused before continuing.
   “You must find Twilight and the rest of the elements, they are the only
   way you can stop Discord!”

           That cold feeling welled up inside of me, and I stomped my foot
   against the stone with a loud crack. “How am I supposed to do that? Why am
   I supposed to do that? Why isn’t my help ever good enough?!”

           Celestia flinched at my outburst, and I was not sorry.

           “Ever since my exile ended, you have done nothing but shut me
   away! Whenever our kingdom was in any real danger, you made sure I was
   away! Why?! Tell me!”

           “Luna... I just worry for you, maybe you could handle things on
   your own, maybe we both could, but the elements are so much safer. They’re
   so much easier and certain!”

           ‘She thinks you’re unreliable. She doesn’t trust you.’

           ‘Birthdays are a good time to reflect on the past, and prepare for
   the future, don’t you think?’

           It hurt, a lot. It felt like someone had stabbed me in the chest
   with an icicle, and I cried out, dropping the little doll to the floor,
   and It vanished in a whirl of black smoke.

   I struggled to catch my breath, and Celestia looked on with concern.

           “...Luna?” She struggled in her chains. “Please tell me you’re
   okay...”

           “I’m fine.” I whispered, then reached out to hug her. “I haven’t
   given up on you, so you can’t give up on me. Alright?”

           Much of my sister’s tension seemed to melt away in my arms, and I
   began to really regret being human. It was a good thing we were dreaming,
   because of that, humanity was not strictly necessary.

   A transformation sequence wasn't even necessary, I just was. I folded my
   hooves under me and nuzzled her. “I am not helpless... You, Princess
   Cadance, myself, we may not be bearers of harmony like Twilight Sparkle
   and her friends, but we are still alicorns.” I shielded her with a wing.
   “We can still make a difference on our own. Are we not products of harmony
   ourselves?”

           Celestia weighed her thoughts carefully, that much will never
   change about her. “Yes... Yes, I’m sorry, you’re right Luna.” She wheezed
   softly through her labored speech. “Just do your very best, and I’m sure
   you’ll find our way out of this mess.”

           I nodded, and felt the not so gentle inertia of the dream pulling
   me away. “I need to go soon, Sister.”

           “Luna! I just... I wanted to say, you were right about him. You
   were right about Discord.”

           “It’s not your fault, you were just being yourself.” I smiled down
   at her. Me, the younger sister, smiling down at her. “You try to bring out
   the best in others, it’s just what you are. We’ll get through this too.” I
   laugh gently, and am delighted by the sound’s bell-like quality. “Hope and
   love, right?”

           My sister smiled at me in return. “Hope and Love.”

           The tugging is becoming more insistent, and I rise to my hooves to
   follow it.

           The sun is starting to set when I wake up, and for once I remember
   one of my dreams, very vividly. I don’t know if it’s because I am that
   much Luna or...

           No... Josh was right, wasn’t he? I was always Luna. Celestia was
   always my...

           Well, that explained my relationship with the show, and at least
   I’m not afraid anymore. I know where my home is now, I know who my family
   is, and I know why I’m not there. It was taken from me, and I need to work
   on taking it back.

           I sat up in bed and stretched. My bones and tendons cracked and
   groaned in all sorts of fun new ways. There is no way this is going to
   stop at a cutie mark and the need for new clothes, and I for one am ready
   for it. At least... I think I am?

   Certainly I am more ready for it than when I was just Eric.

           I climbed out of bed and stumbled over to the door. Walking on two
   legs all of a sudden isn’t so easy, but I remember myself quickly.
   Switching gears, that’s the hard part. I just had to remind myself that I
   still have two legs.

   The house was quiet, and when I reached the kitchen I discover why. My
   mom, Robert, and John were seated at the table around a small store-bought
   cake.

   I reached up to scratch my head and yawn. My hair is definitely longer
   now, but no one seems to notice, except maybe Robert, but he has an
   excellent poker face.

           “We were wondering when you’d get up.” My mom commented with naked
   irritation.

           “Happy Birthday!” John and Robert both called out, John’s
   enthusiasm didn’t exactly feel sincere, but Robert’s picked up the slack.

           We took a bit to light the candles, and Mom insisted we sing the
   most awkward performance of Happy Birthday in the history of the human
   race. I stared at the little 25 on top of my cake and huffed to myself.

           ‘Quite a bit older than 25, actually.’

           I blew out the candles and made perhaps the most realistic wish of
   any of my birthdays. I wished for all of my memories of home back, because
   already that dream was starting to feel pretty fuzzy, and I am not so sure
   how much like Luna I feel anymore. That really didn't take long at all.

           Memories have a scary power, when you really dwell on it.

           Everyone cheered softly, and Robert slugged me on the shoulder,
   though not very hard. I flinched in anticipation of another 24 hits from
   him, but they never come, and we start dividing up the tiny cake.
   Predictably, after we each get a slice we start going our separate ways.
   Mom heads for her room like she always does after work, and John retreats
   back to his room. I managed to take a few bites of my cake before Robert
   pulled me aside and spoke with a serious tone that was rather unlike him.

           “You should go have a talk with Mom.”

           “About the Luna thing?”

           “About everything,” he paused. “I don’t think she even recognizes
   you as her kid anymore.”

           “That’s not exactly my fault you know?” I look down in an effort
   to hide my guilt, because honestly she does not really feel like my mother
   anymore.

           “It’s not exactly anyone’s fault, just go to her.”

           “How do we even know she is my mother? It seems pretty likely that
   I’m actually Luna here.”

           Robert licked his lips and stared at me, his eyes narrowing.
   “Unless your existence as a magical horse in some kind of past life
   retcons her squeezing you out of a very small hole, and then basically
   sacrificing her own life goals for you, she’s still your mother. I don’t
   care if you’re the Dunwich Horror.” He guided me with a hand against the
   small of my back and then gave a soft push. “Now go.”

           I conceded to his logic and marched my happy little self into my
   Mom’s room, and she seemed pretty surprised to see me, because she jumped.

           “Oh... Um, happy birthday?”

           I nod in solemn appreciation. “Thank you.”

   I stood in the doorway for a while, and we both picked at our cake in
   silence.

           “So um...” I stammered. “How is work going?”

           “Work is fine,” she nodded slowly. “I got a few more cases, so I’m
   taking care of five people a week now.”

           I nodded in understanding. “Right, because you’re a CNA...” I took
   another forkful of cake, followed by another, until it is finally
   finished. I placed the empty plate on the dresser by the door and walked
   over, taking a seat on the bed beside her. “I uh... I missed you?”

           She stared at me for a moment, then scowled. “No you didn’t.”

           “I didn’t?” I tilt my head in response.

           “You were gone for seven months, and at no point during that time
   did you call me, not until you needed to come back.” She drank from a
   glass of wine. “You called because you were out of options.” She looked me
   in the eyes. “You didn’t.”

           “I'm... sorry.” I looked away in sadness, and tried not to think
   about how I let a family member down again. “I am not very good at family
   stuff.”

           “Well, we've noticed.” She said, taking another gulp of wine. She
   reached out with a hand and seized my chin, pulling my face until I’m
   looking her in the eye again, but without enough force to hurt. “You don’t
   even look the same anymore. Not like my son at all...” She shook her head.
   “Pretty eyes though, wish my eyes were like that.” She looked me over
   carefully, and stopped at my hair. “I’m not sure how I feel about the
   streaks though. It makes you look kinda gay.”

           I considered telling her everything right then, and opened my
   mouth to speak.

           But I didn’t say anything, she was halfway through this bottle of
   wine, and it was a big one. It just didn’t seem prudent.

           I got off the bed and walked over to pick up my plate. She didn’t
   say anything further, and neither did I.

   Before visiting the kitchen I made a stop at the bathroom to get a good
   look at myself.

           I had gotten a haircut before leaving Wisconsin three days ago,
   and when I had arrived in San Diego it was still very short, but that had
   changed over the course of the day. My ears were hidden behind long
   strands of black hair, with streaks of light blue. I guess no magic mane
   for me, at least not yet. Strictly season one hair for me.

           My eyes weren’t brown anymore, either. They must have changed
   while I slept, or just when I hadn’t been paying attention. They were a
   bright turquoise,  and like my cutie mark they had a faint glow to them.

           Robert must have been getting something from his room, because he
   wasn’t in the kitchen when I arrived. I loaded the dishwasher carefully,
   and began sorting the various dishes more neatly than the way Robert had
   left them throughout the day.

           I had to agree with my mom. Those eyes...  my eyes, were very
   pretty.

   --------------------------------------------------------------------------

  Under Lock and Key

           Robert entered the kitchen before I could even finish. He had his
   wallet out in front of him and was scrutinizing its contents carefully. He
   gave a satisfied nod and slipped it back into his pocket before looking up
   at me.

           “You and Mom are never satisfied with how I fill the
   dishwasher...” He grumbled.

           “Well that’s because it’s wrong.” I finished washing one of our
   nicer knives and began drying it with a towel.

           That’s odd, by all accounts I had been getting gradually smaller.
   I’ve maybe lost an inch or two by now, and yet I’m looking down at
   Robert’s eyes.

           “Uh... Eric, what are you doing?” Robert looked down and tilted
   his head. “Look, practice is good and all, but you don’t have hooves yet.”

           “I don’t know what you’re talkin-” I shook my head and looked
   down. “About...”

           I had been standing on the tips of my toes for some time now, and
   hadn’t even been aware of it. Simple mistake, anypony could make it. I’ll
   just lay my feet flat.

           I swung my arms around and Robert had to step out of the
   trajectory of the knife I had just lost my grip on. I tried to regain my
   balance but that just pitched me forward, which sent me right into Robert.
   It's a good thing he caught me and the impact was minimized. Apparently
   standing with my feet flat would require coordination, a degree of balance
   that previously would have been necessary to stand as I was now.

           Robert looked down at me, and for the first time since all of this
   started he looked actually afraid. The time for joking was over I guess. I
   grimaced and shoved myself out of his arms.

           “I’m okay, everything is fine.” I tried to right my feet again but
   gave up as soon as I started to lose my balance.

           ‘Damn it.’

           “Eric, can we speak in my room?” Robert mouthed the word now.

           I looked around to see if we were the only ones present, we were.
   I shrugged, but dutifully followed.

           When we got to his room Robert shut the door behind him. I trotted
   over to the bed before taking a seat. Robert made way to his computer
   chair and then spun around to face me.

           “Eric, I’m a little concerned.”



   “Oh?” I raised a brow at him. “You are only just now getting there? It’d
   be nice if we could ever be on the same page. I’m freaked out and you
   think it’s a joke. I’m okay with it and you start freaking out.” I rolled
   my eyes. “So what has you worried all of a sudden?”

           Robert’s eyes went wide and he started to lean back, and away from
   me. “Wait... You’re okay with this?” His voice started to carry, and I
   glared at him. He lowered his voice to a hiss. “I just got done talking to
   Josh. He’s convinced he’s some pony named Nightwatch now. He’s convinced
   you are actually Luna...”

           “So what if I am?” I leaned back to prop myself up against the
   wall. “I do have her cutiemark, don’t I? Why else would I have it?”

           “Yeah, well. Now Nightwatch has a tail.” Robert rubbed the bridge
   of his nose and looked at the ground. “She also has horse ears now.”

           “Pony ears.” I corrected. “And what of it? Did you for some reason
   think I was turning into some kind of humanized Luna?”

           “Why shouldn’t I have thought that? Until your feet started acting
   up, that is exactly what it looked like...” He looked me dead center in
   the eye. “You don’t have a problem with the idea of turning into an
   animal? Because I guarantee you, the world will have a problem with that.”

           I crossed my arms defensively and huffed. “Humans are animals as
   well.”

           He remained silent after that, and stared at me with disbelief.
   Finally, when it became evident that I had nothing more to say, he spoke
   up. “I told my friend Ed, he’s way into the occult.” He pointed at me with
   his index finger. “We’re going to find a way to fix you.”

           “I don’t want to be fixed...” I pulled away from him, and closer
   to the wall.

           Robert got out of the chair and pulled himself up onto the bed
   until we were facing each other. He reached out to hug me, and I didn’t
   have the heart to stop him.

           “Eric, if this happens... You won’t be able to stay here anymore.
   There’s no way we can keep a... a pony here.”

           “I wasn’t planning on staying here.” I replied matter of factly.
   “I was planning on going home and saving Celestia.”

           My exasperated brother released me from his embrace and collapsed
   on the bed. “Oh god... Eric? How far gone are you?”

           I sniffed and lifted my head with pride. “How far gone am I? You
   are lucky I respond to that name anymore.”

           “Just... please humor me on this? Please? I don’t want to lose my
   brother...”

           A surge of warmth radiated from my pendant, and my cutiemark. I
   found myself nodding before I had even consciously considered it.
   “...Okay.” I whispered. I could tell from the way Robert’s body went slack
   as the tension left him that he was relieved. “So what happens now?”

           “Now we go to the beach! If we can’t fix you, I at least want your
   last human memories to be of somewhere fun!”

           I tilted my head. “But it’s the middle of the night. Doesn’t that
   sort of defeat the purpose of going to the beach?”

           “You don’t think it’s worth going to the beach, because it’s
   nighttime? That doesn’t sound very Lunaish, you know.”

           I laughed at that. “Yeah, I dunno it’s just...” I felt a very
   strange pang of longing, a kind of homesickness that used to haunt me in
   the past as a kid, but never like this. “I think the night sky here is
   just going to make me miss the sky back home even more. If that makes
   sense...”

           Robert’s smile faltered and I could tell that he was as upset and
   confused as I was, but he pressed on anyway. “Well, the cool ocean breeze
   will do us some good. It’s not healthy to be cooped up in this dusty town
   all the time.”

           “Yeah, I won’t argue with you there!” I smiled and hopped up off
   of the bed. “So uh... Just let me get changed first, I guess.”

           “Sure thing.” Robert smiled in return and left the room. It seemed
   to me that he was just happy to get his way in this.

           The door closed with a soft click, and I got off the bed to
   rummage through my bag of clothes. It was sorta hard to imagine ever not
   needing them, but when I thought about it, I really wasn’t going to need
   them much longer. I wasn’t sure if I should feel liberated or horrified
   about that.

   I decided if we were going to the beach I might get a little wet, even at
   this hour. So I decided on a pair of dark blue cargo shorts that had
   always been too big for me, but by now were massive. I grabbed a belt to
   hold them up, and a black t-shirt to complete the outfit.

   I stripped down before going to the mirror to inspect myself. It was
   incredibly awkward to even consider that a thing worth doing, but then
   again I had spent the entire day wrapped up in either clothes or blankets,
   or both. I kinda wanted to see if anything important had changed.

           My reflection was pretty... Captivating? Different? I’m not sure
   how to describe it. Without my clothes on I could easily see how much of
   me had changed. I didn’t even have a spec of body hair on me, anywhere.
   This struck me as odd, because I’m pretty sure women have some of that
   themselves... I shook my head. It seemed logical to assume that the hair
   could just turn into fur, but apparently it was just easier to shed all of
   it and grow magical horse fur from scratch.

           My hair had finished up its own changes as well. I now had an
   abundance of long light blue hair that did a very good job of resembling
   Luna’s mane in season one. Although it twisted to frame my face in a
   manner that really should have required a stylist, I could tell it was
   definitely starting to grow more lengthwise, as opposed to evenly spaced.

           In a general way, I pretty much did look like a humanized Luna.
   Aside from the chest and uh... Down below, that is. There was a faint glow
   surrounding my cutiemark that could not have been just from it catching
   the moonlight from the window, as it was evenly illuminated on both hips.
   Somehow just staring at it made all of the changes feel connected and
   according to plan. It felt like a sign that things were going to improve.
   Like I had labored under some kind of illness that was only just now
   starting to clear up. Despite my building anxiety over the past few days,
   staring at this just relaxed me. I could probably stare at those stupid
   marks literally for hours, but was interrupted by a sharp pain from my
   rear.

   If you’ve ever tried to sit in a chair that didn’t exist, only to slam
   down onto your tailbone, it was pretty much like that. I fell forward and
   gripped the dirty brown carpet with trembling hands. There was nothing
   subtle or quick about this change at all. It felt like segments of
   something that never existed were snapping back into place.

           ‘I guess I’m getting my tail then...’ I thought with a grimace.
   Very weird, I would have thought it would be more of a snaking... growing
   feeling? This was like getting struck by a really thick rubber band over
   and over again, and each time it hit you it was a little further out than
   it should have been.

           Finally the sensation stopped, and I collapsed onto the floor
   completely. I took in a few deep breaths to center myself and lifted
   myself up as best I could with my legs folded under me and my hands on the
   ground on either side of them.

           It was hard to say what had been the bigger change, my cutiemark
   first appearing or the tail that was now curled loosely around my side. I
   rose to my feet and covered the lower half of my face with a hand. Yup...
   Definitely humanized Luna at this point.

           I reached out to touch my tail, which is a thought process most
   people will never get to follow. That was an idea that brought me some
   amusement, at least. The hair was the same colour as my mane, and roughly
   the same texture, albeit a bit smoother? The feeling in it was very numb
   for the time being, and it twitched occasionally. I guess that makes
   sense, adjusting, adapting, whatever. It was like a limb that had been
   asleep for as long as I could remember, and was only just starting to stir
   with renewed blood flow.

           Someone knocked on the door, and this drove me out of my
   introspective state of mind. I needed to do something about this tail
   before I could get dressed, but was drawing a blank. I could hear a bit of
   arguing on the other side of the door, and the doorknob started to turn a
   bit from weight being applied to it.

           I pulled my shirt on over my head, and could feel my hair tickle
   my back. It was definitely going to take some time getting used to having
   long hair now. It was such a weird sensation after a lifetime of cutting
   it short. I grabbed my shorts and slipped into them. Luckily they were big
   enough that my tail didn’t get caught on them, but it did trail out of one
   of the legs. I didn’t have time to fasten the belt before the door opened,
   so I just stood there with my hands in my pockets, trying to hold my
   shorts up.

           Robert was in the doorway arguing with John. They stopped talking
   when the door swung open and just glowered at each other. The scuffle
   ended when John broke eye contact and looked at me, and I shivered. I knew
   that look. I’ve given that look before... I think? In another time,
   another place? It was the look of Cain ready to have a go at Abel.

   John stormed off to him room in defeat once more, but I knew things were
   coming to a head in this household, and that was only going to get worse
   once my condition became common knowledge. Robert entered and closed the
   door with a sigh.

           “We’re going to have to do something about him soon, or he’s going
   to lash out.” I whispered.

           “I know.”

           “No, I mean he is really going to lash out,” I gulped. “Like
   Nightmare Moon style.”

           Robert snapped and kicked his desk before spinning around. “Then
   send him to the moon or something, right?” He growled.

           I shook my head, and proceeded to completely miss the point.
   “First of all, it was Celestia that did that... To me.” I considered for a
   moment. “Also I am pretty sure that would require the Elements of Harmony,
   and I don’t have those.”

           My brother just looked at me for awhile and squinted. “I was
   joking.” He looked me up and down, then fixed his eyes on my pant leg. “I
   see you got your tail then?”

           He looked much more nervous than before, and I guess I could
   sympathize. The hair thing had only started an hour or two ago, and now I
   had grown an entire tail. We didn’t need to voice the mutual
   understanding. The changes were getting faster.

           “Y-Yeah... I did.” My tail flicked slightly now that my attention
   was on it, though it was still for the most part restrained by my
   clothing. It was much less numb than before and somehow this boosted my
   spirits quite a bit. Part of me just wanted to reach down, pry it free,
   and hug it close. I’m not ashamed to admit it! The stupid thing was pretty
   valuable to me!

           ‘I bet I could spend hours just brushing it.’ I thought with glee.
   ‘It is important to maintain a fine appearance!’

           Well... That lit up my face like a lantern. I folded my hands
   behind my back, and my tail drooped with shame. I couldn’t keep the
   corners of my mouth from smiling, though. ‘Ha! My tail is expressing my
   emotions! That is so...’ I shook my head. ‘Normal? Why does it feel so
   normal?’

   Robert scrunched up his face about as effectively as a human can manage,
   and went over to his desk. “We should get going now, I guess. Before
   you’re on all fours or whatever...” He pulled open a drawer and dug around
   before coming back with a pair of scissors.

   I instinctively grabbed my tail with a hand and backed away, at some point
   it had pulled free of my excessively loose shorts and was swishing about
   with anxiety.

           “Oh chill out, I’m just making a hole.” He grabbed the waistband
   of my shorts and yanked me over roughly.

           A few snips and it was done. He let me go and I stepped back and
   away from him, still balanced on the tips of my toes. The hole he made was
   small, so it took some effort to fit my tail through, but that was
   probably for the better in the long run. I picked up my belt and fastened
   the thick cloth through the two metal rings that acted as a buckle. It was
   comical how much of it was dangling loosely on the other side. I guess my
   waist is just a bit thinner now, giant shorts aside.

           “There, now we can go to the stupid beach, and anyone who sees you
   will probably think you’re just some weird cos-player.” He shook his head.
   “Not that there will be anyone there but maybe a couple of drunks... It’s
   Tuesday night. We should be fine as long as we don’t go on the pier.”

           I nodded in agreement, and looked down when a familiar warm
   feeling started to flood my body. A soft glow could be seen coming from
   under the legs of my shorts, and Robert seemed to notice as well.

           “Oh christ, what now?!” He grabbed his keys and shoved himself
   into his jacket with disdain.

           The feeling spread up to my head and I began to feel incredibly
   dizzy, it focused in on my ears and I felt that annoying familiar twitch.
   I leaned back against the dresser to steady myself and reached up to see
   if my ears had changed.

           Nope, typical human ears, false alarm... I guess.

           Didn’t seem like the magic glow from my cutiemark was dying down
   anytime soon, though.

           “Let’s go...” Robert grumbled darkly, and led me out of the room.

           Somehow I got the distinct impression he was no longer so certain
   that our ‘Night on the Town’ was a good idea, but once he makes plans it’s
   pretty much impossible to get him to back off. So out we went.

           The ride to the beach was short and uneventful, even if it was on
   the other side of the city. The night was better than I thought it would
   be, that’s for certain. On more than one occasion Robert grabbed my
   shoulder and yanked my head back through the window. Evidently enjoying
   the cool night wind in your mane is against the law. He did not take my
   comment regarding the creation of new laws very seriously.

           We parked in a lot at the base of the winding staircase that went
   up to the pier. It was dark here, and Robert was convinced no one that
   really mattered could see me that way. Robert’s car had seen better days,
   the beat up Honda Civic was road-worthy, but I didn’t envy Robert the
   money he was using to keep it on life support. I started to wonder how he
   could afford school, a car, and his wild lifestyle with just a part time
   job at a call center. He must do a lot of saving during the summer months.

           The beach was so much colder than our little town had been, and I
   wrapped my arms around myself and shivered. Body hair accounts for more
   warmth than people seem to give it credit for. Or maybe that’s just part
   of the whole changing thing.

           It didn’t last long though, another surge of warmth from my cutie
   mark, and suddenly I didn’t feel quite so cold. My ears flicked in
   confusion and for once had the mobility to follow through. I reached up
   with a clumsy hand and jumped a bit when they caressed soft fur.

           ‘Jeez, pony ears and a tail, it’s going to be really hard to
   muster a poker face from now on...’ My ears wilted back to prove my point
   for me.

           Robert stared at me when it happened, I think it was the first
   time he had actually seen the transformation in action. He did not seem
   put at ease by it, instead he folded his arms and leaned against the side
   of his car. He looked more miserable than I've ever seen.

           I stood balanced on the tips of my bare feet and folded my arms
   behind my back. It helped with posture. “So what are we doing now?”

           “We’re waiting.” Robert replied curtly.

           My newly equine ears flicked with curiosity and I tilted my head
   in response. “Waiting for what?”

           “Them,” he responded as an old beat up station wagon pulled into a
   spot adjacent to us. After the vehicle finished parking and shutting down,
   two men hopped out and marched on over. They complimented each other, I
   will admit that much. One was tall and thin, the other was short and
   rather portly.

   The short one had an unkempt collection of brown hair that was probably as
   close as a human is going to get to having a mane. His face was unshaven,
   though he lacked any significant beard or cultivated facial hair. He wore
   a pentacle around his neck and wore a shirt advertising some band that was
   definitely too edgy for me. I was altogether unimpressed. It was hard for
   me to respect the kind of man who came to a beach wearing combat boots.

           The tall one had a far more conservative look about him, though
   his partner was a textbook unwashed male, he was a bit more elegant and
   clean. He wore a silvery gray shirt and dark gray shorts with a pair of
   black sandals. Around one wrist was a thick silver bracelet with the
   different phases of the moon carved into it. It didn’t quite fit his
   skinny wrist, but I thought it was wonderful all the same.

           Robert approached the short one and essentially tackled him in a
   hug, which was returned, albeit with less enthusiasm. The tall one seemed
   incredibly uncomfortable.

           “Edward! I’m so glad to see you! Thanks for coming out man!” My
   brother spared no time identifying the fat one, and I bristled quietly.

           “What’s the meaning of this? I thought we were supposed to do this
   later! Something about one last night to relax or whatever?” I glared
   imperiously from my position on raised toes.

           Edward stalked toward me with a look of naked wonder on his face.
   A fascination he quickly struggled to disguise as he attempted to make
   idle conversation. “Wow Robert, you weren’t kidding.”

           Robert awkwardly greeted the tall man before turning to face me
   and my displeasure. “And uh... Hey Andrew, how are things with Ann?”

           “We broke up.” Andrew replied in a deadpan voice that made Robert
   wince and immediately switch social targets.

           “Listen... Eric, I’m sorry to spring this on you, but you’ve
   noticed it as much as I have. The changes are happening more quickly.” He
   shook his head. “We may not even have another night, but I don’t see why
   we can’t just hang out. You can answer a few of Edward’s questions and we
   can walk along the cliffs or whatever!”

           My tail and ears made my unhappiness known with a few sharp
   flicks. “Fine, I guess I don’t see the harm in that...” The things I do
   for my family.

           Edward spared no time getting right up in my face. I raised a brow
   at him as he curiously paced around me, scrutinizing my every feature.
   Andrew looked almost as embarrassed as I felt. There was a sharp sting
   from my tail and I cried out before whirling around against the nosy
   little rat.

           “What do you think you’re doing? That’s enough!”

           Edward stood absolutely still, a light blue strand of hair from my
   tail still held between his thumb and forefinger. He quietly slid it into
   the pocket of his jacket and dusted his hands.

           “Sorry about that... Just wanted to see if it was real is all.” He
   narrowed his eyes at Robert. “Your brother has gone to greater lengths
   than this to prank me before.”

           My lips tightened into a frown. “I’m sure.”

           “Listen, can we just try to calm things down?” Robert wormed his
   way between the two of us in an effort to diffuse a territorial dispute.
   “Let's just start walking, alright?”

           We all followed after Robert, some of us more meekly than others.
   The pier acted as a sort of divider between the sand of the beach and the
   rough wave sculpted rock of the cliffs. Even at night you could see the
   myriad things etched into the stone by bored passersby and love struck
   couples with a swiss army knife on hoof.

           Or hand, for that matter.

           We finally reached a quiet spot without any illumination and
   settled down. I sat on the edge of the cliffs with my feet dangling just
   far enough over the side for the waves to tickle them as they rose up.
   Andrew was amazingly less shy when he took off his sandals and sat beside
   me, though it was obvious he was doing his best to not look in my
   direction. Sometimes he did anyway, and I would catch him blushing.

           I felt odd about that. It wasn’t that I was flattered or offended
   by it. What was peculiar was my absence of feeling one way or another.
   There was only a nebulous understanding that we were not even in the same
   class. We may as well have been different species. I guess pretty soon
   that would actually be the case, but still.

           Robert and Edward were off discussing things. My ears swiveled to
   hone in on their conversation, but I found it uninteresting for the most
   part. Edward wanted to know why they hadn’t taken me to his place instead
   of going on this insipid adventure first, and Robert wanted to know why Ed
   was being so insensitive.

           I peered up at the sky. The stars were difficult to see through
   the marine layer, but the moon was big and bright. It would be full soon,
   I knew.

           ‘It will be full in 31 hours.’ I mused quietly, and then blinked.
   Wait... What?

           I leaned onto my back with my arms crossed behind my head and
   stared up at the moon. Something felt off about it, was it too small? Too
   distant? Was it just the nature of it in general? I had a sinking feeling
   that I wouldn’t be altering the course of day and night anytime soon.
   Maybe having an intimate understanding of its cycle was just the best I
   could manage? I closed my eyes and felt the gentle pull of its gravity
   against the water around me. It was a soothing feeling, and I could just
   imagine reaching out to that force, greeting it warmly like a distant
   relation, and then gently mani-

           Searing pain unlike anything I had ever felt before raged through
   my skull and shot through the rest of my body. I screamed very loudly, and
   in a shrill high voice. I grabbed at the sides of my head as if that would
   somehow contain things, even as I started kicking and thrashing about. I
   could feel Andrew’s hands wrap around my wrists before being pinned to the
   slick rock, then a moment of hesitation as he climbed on top of me to keep
   me from slipping into the water.

           “Eric!?” Robert’s voiced sounded distant despite its urgency. I
   heard the sound of heavy footfalls, and felt someone lifting my necklace
   up over my head before replacing it with something else. My thighs were on
   fire and the pain in my head was only getting worse. Even so, I managed to
   open my eyes and look at what was happening.

           Edward was staring at me in wonder, Andrew had been shoved off of
   me and was on his rear, limbs splayed out to catch himself, and Robert's
   hands were gripping my shoulders tightly. He was shaking me back and forth
   and crying.

           “See? I told you we should have just taken her to my place.”
   Edward grumbled.

           I was starting to fade and lose consciousness, but I wasn’t giving
   up without a fight.

           “Shut up and help me get him to the car...” Robert grunted and
   placed his arms around me before trying to stand up.

           Edward reached into his jacket and pulled out a small but thick
   metal bar, it was painted a dull gray and reflected no moonlight. He
   raised it into the air and brought it down on the back of Robert’s head.

           That expression would have been funny under less violent
   circumstances. Robert’s mouth dropped open as though he were trying to
   exaggerate an ‘O’ sound, and his eyes were wide. He dropped me, my impact
   with the ground only made me fade faster. He fell to his knees and slowly
   turned to face Edward. He was confused, and I could tell the blow was
   almost certainly a knock out.

           Edward reached out with his foot and shoved Robert off the side of
   the cliff and into the water. “We’ll take mine, thanks.” He placed the bar
   back into his jacket and turned to Andrew, who honestly looked more
   startled than Robert had, if that were possible.

           “Come on, help me get her to the car.”

           That’s about when I lost consciousness.

           The sun was too bright, and the ground was too hot to walk on with
   my bare feet. Why feet and not hooves, I wondered? I danced from foot to
   foot and raced in the only direction I had time to consider, straight
   ahead. Time didn’t really make sense, and I was in too much pain to keep
   track anyway.

           Eventually I did reach a comforting blanket of shadow, and
   abruptly the sun was gone. In its place was a glorious and peaceful night
   sky that was littered with diamonds of gentle light, and in the center of
   it all, a brilliant comforting moon. A real one, not the tiny placeholder
   I had grown up with.

   I trotted forward on my hooves and looked around. I felt at peace. This
   was a sanctuary for me, and I could spend hours exploring every inch and
   never be less enchanted by it.

   I came to a massive rock wall, and in the side was a fissure large enough
   to form a narrow canyon. I had to wriggle through at first before the area
   really opened up, but when it did I had to take a breath to steady myself.
   The moon was hovering overhead, and was so large the opening in the rock
   above me could not fit its entirety. The light from above reflected off
   the walls and gave everything a faint silvery glow. It reminded me vaguely
   of a memory in some other place. A place where I stood on two legs and my
   cutie mark had only just appeared, glowing with that same light. I shook
   my head to clear it of such outlandish thoughts and proceeded deeper.

           The air here was thin and damp, and reminded me of altitudes one
   might reach while napping on a cloud. The wind sang through the chambers
   and carved the layers of rock into a monochromatic rainbow while also
   tugging at my mane and tail. My wings I kept firmly tucked into my sides
   to avoid unnecessary discomfort. In certain areas I could see drawings,
   little cave paintings of a time when the sun and the moon had been
   friends.

           It seemed over time, such had stopped being the case.

           The narrow passageway curved outwards rather abruptly and formed a
   large chamber, and upon entering it the crack behind me slammed together
   like some great burden had been lifted off of it. I jumped away from it,
   flapping my wings restlessly and alighting on the ground with the soft
   patter of gilded hooves. I turned away from the wall, content that my
   safety was no longer in jeopardy.

           The moon could be seen, clear and completely, from the much wider
   opening. It radiated magic down to the ground I walked until it was like a
   wellspring of moonlight. In the center of the chamber was a massive dial.
   Many circles trailed the circumference of the dial, and in each sat a
   reflection of myself. At the start was a human man I could only barely
   associate with, in each circle it became increasingly me, increasingly a
   pony, but even when it was completely a pony it was not completely myself.
   Its mane was the soft light blue of my youth, and it did not drift in the
   air on winds that did not exist. The circles winded back around until the
   pony was a human once more. The focus of the moonlight danced around and
   centered on each it its own time, and I could sense that the dial itself
   was a source of great confusion. Though I knew not to what.

           I circled the dial cautiously, doing my best to sate my curiosity
   from a safe distance. Aside from the obvious there was nothing truly
   remarkable about it. There were no more clues as to its nature, but I
   could not help but feel attracted to it. It had a certain gravity all its
   own that made me want to come closer, and closer...

           I shook my head to clear it of the strange effect. Something was
   happening in the sky above, and it demanded my immediate attention. The
   sun had finally caught up to me, it looked like. Every inch that its light
   claimed in my sanctuary felt invasive, and I scooted back in fear until my
   rear was pressed up against the cold stone wall on the opposite side.

           The sun pushed the moon out of the sky, and the ground shook with
   the occasional shard that crashed down from the impact. Springs of
   moonlight bubbled up from the ground where they landed, only to be dried
   up by the light of the sun, which slowly crept toward me and was now
   beginning to land on the dial.

           The construct shifted and screeched under the oppressive gleam,
   and a single solitary shadow landed on a phase in between pony and human,
   an occurrence that to me appeared quite auspicious. I didn’t have too much
   time to dwell on this, because the entire thing, reflections and all,
   collapsed into a twitching pool of liquid darkness. It oozed over and away
   from the sunlight. Which of course meant it was heading in my direction.

           I could not stop myself. I screamed, begged, and pleaded for the
   sun to halt its jealous advance. I tried to tell it what it was doing from
   my pathetic place down on the ground, but it either did not hear me or did
   not care. The caustic liquid was almost upon me, and I took wing in
   earnest. It didn’t do me much good.

           Tendrils lashed out like a frightened child or animal, and wrapped
   themselves around me in an embrace that choked the air out of me and
   pulled me down. I felt cold all over, but at least I was safe from the
   sunlight. As long as I was surrounded by that eternal night it would be
   safe, and so would I. Even if I was human, and I noted with some dismay
   that I was. I was even male to add insult to injury, though my abdomen
   ached and burned with a persistence that was really starting to get to me.
   That, coupled with a burning from my thighs, dragged me from that pitch
   black pool and into the searing light of day. I opened my eyes and
   screamed.

           The sun was in my eyes when I woke up, and it was blinding. That
   didn’t do a lot to distract me from the unbearable agony I was feeling
   just south of my waistband, though. My cutiemark was burning with enough
   energy to make my legs twitch and my toes curl in like some cruel mockery
   of hooves. It was a safe bet that I was changing again, and given where
   those changes were centered I was convinced I didn’t want to watch.

           I groaned and thrashed about while tears slowly trickled down my
   face. I didn’t sob, but there were times when I certainly wanted to. It
   had probably only been a few minutes, but it felt like hours before the
   pain finally receded. I stole a glance down the front of my shorts just to
   check on things and sighed. Yup, I was definitely a she now. Time to make
   a full scale assault on the birth certificate, we can get that pesky name
   out of the way while we’re at it. Eric is a terrible name for a girl. Luna
   would be far more appropriate.

           This definitely was not the cliffs where I had passed out, either.
   I was having difficulty remembering what had happened there just in
   general. Whatever happened it couldn’t have ended well, because I was in
   some tiny room with a bowl of water and a bowl of cheap store bought
   salad. Around my neck was a thick but relatively pliant leather cuff that
   was attached to a really thick and durable looking chain. The chain itself
   was wrapped around a support beam for the ceiling. If I had to guess I’d
   say I was in some kind of cabin. The room was clear of items, aside from
   the kind of cheap bed comforter you might find in a Walmart, and a large
   pot nearby. There wasn’t even a clock for me to keep track of the time.

           ‘Pretty sure it’s 4:32 in the afternoon, anyway...’ I thought
   bitterly. Evidently my knowledge of the moon extended to what time of day
   it was.

           Sparing a final scrutinizing look around the room, I decided that
   random knack would actually prove useful. It didn’t look like I was going
   anywhere anytime soon at least.

           The room was painted with occult symbols of all sorts, and
   apparently some of them were still drying. So my makeshift cell was a
   recent development. Around each of my wrists was a small metal cuff of
   some rough metal, and both were held shut with simple Masterlocks. They
   weren’t attached to anything though, which had me vaguely confused.

           This was all very weird, and somehow painfully familiar. The
   events from the night before started to trickle back to me in reverse, and
   I felt nothing but outrage. I tugged at the chain around my neck
   half-heartedly. I already knew I wouldn’t be breaking it, not like this.
   Maybe when things finish up I can buck the support beam, or rip the chain
   apart with magic, or something.

           Speaking of magic, what the hell had happened to my head last
   night? It felt like someone stabbed me with a red hot poker. Not that I’ve
   ever actually felt that, but I feel comfortable with my comparison. I
   reached up tentatively and poked around, and yelped when my hand brushed
   up against a narrow protrusion coming out of my skull.

           It wasn’t as long as in the show yet, but it was pretty close in
   size to an average unicorn horn. A thought occurred to me: ‘I wonder if I
   can do magic?’

           I licked my lips with anticipation, and well, also because they
   felt pretty dry. What was I going to try first? I turned about in my cell
   with my tail swishing erratically, and searched for something worthwhile.

           ‘Right! The chain! It couldn’t hurt to start there!’

           I stared at the length of metal links until my eyes started to go
   cross, and thumped my foot against the hardwood floor in irritation when
   things didn’t seem to take.

           ‘I don’t even know what I am doing...’

           I grit my teeth and growled before releasing my frustration with a
   high pitched yell. “Stupid chain! Break!”

           A crackling feeling filled my mind and faint midnight blue sparks
   flared from the tip of my horn. The chain was abruptly seized in an aura
   of the same colour.

           “Wha-”

           I didn’t have time to vocalize my confusion, the aura gave a sharp
   yank on the chain. I yelped and reached up for the collar around my neck
   just as I was pulled with the chain and slammed into the support beam. My
   vision filled with stars and I started choking for air.

           The door to my room slammed open and in its place stood a very
   irritated looking Edward. “What the hell is going on here!?” He stomped
   over to where I was curled up, but took a step back when a few errant
   sparks flew from my horn.

           “Oh you know, just trying to break free of this chain. The usual
   thing someone does when you KIDNAP THEM.” My voice elevated in volume
   towards the end, and he blinked like this was the first time he’d heard my
   voice.

           Edward grumbled to himself and started pacing around the room. I
   glared at him from my spot on the floor, but didn’t get up.

           “Of course I kidnapped you! Whatever is happening to you, whatever
   the hell you are, it’s magic! Do you know how fucking long I’ve been
   trying to get that right?” He took a step toward me. “How long we have
   been trying to get that right?” He shook his head. “The hell does it
   matter to you if we collect a few strands of hair or take some blood
   samples? You’re lucky I don’t take a hacksaw to that horn and try it for a
   wand.”

           “Are you absolutely serious? That is disgusting!” I finally rose
   to my feet, and he crept back a bit in surprise. “You’re a disgusting
   individual! When I get out of this I swear I’m going t—”

           I’m really running out of creative ways to describe how much
   something hurts, suffice it to say my threat was cut off when the bones in
   my feet started to crunch together, and left me with an ultimately more
   equine alternative to human feet. I wailed out and collapsed onto my rear,
   then I wailed out again because I landed on my tail. I looked down and
   noticed that my new feet—Horses still have those, I reminded myself, only
   the hard bit is called a hoof—didn’t even have any fur covering them. The
   hoof itself was a light shade of blue, so it would blend in with the fur
   when it did start growing in. But at the moment it was kind of disgusting.
   I did my best to focus my attention on Edward instead.

           “I don’t really think I have much to worry about. Every time you
   get uppity, some new change seems to incapacitate your ass.” Edward
   replied smugly. “I don’t have time for you right now, Andrew will be by in
   a bit to check your food and water.”

           All I could do for now was glare at him as he slammed the door
   behind him. I can’t imagine myself ever wishing that I could just hurry up
   and be a pony more than that moment. I turned to reach out for the
   comforter to huddle against, or at least to cover my hooves with it. A
   snap sounded from my horn that startled me, and I realized that I had
   forgotten to reach out for it with my hands, a soft blue aura was holding
   it in the air before me, and as soon as I realized what was happening it
   fluttered to the ground softly.

           I stared at it for a few moments before reaching out and pulling
   it over me.

           It turns out that Andrew coming by soon actually meant Andrew
   would be coming by three hours later. Also, I found out what the large pot
   was for. You think you can cope with these sorts of things, you think
   you’ve had plenty of dreams where you walked on hooves and everything
   worked out just fine. The reality was quite a bit different, and the
   second I put weight on my feet so as to stand, a wave of vertigo overtook
   me.

           I am not ashamed to say I threw up. I actually take pride in the
   truth that I had the presence of mind to aim for the pot.

           Things got better quickly. I adapted, and it wasn’t as though it
   was unfamiliar to me. Like every other change there was a faint euphoria,
   a sensation that this was right and somehow true. I wasn’t sure if that
   was positive reinforcement from my body to help me cope, or if it was just
   memories welling up from inside of me.

           The water bowl was emptied by me using the liquid to clean my
   mouth. I drank whatever was leftover, and ate the salad to replace what I
   had lost. By the time Andrew came in he actually had work to do.

           The youth was dressed all in black now, but not in some goth
   style. He wore slacks and a collared shirt, for example. Though he did
   seem altogether miserable, which I suppose is a fairly goth thing to be.
   It was hard to not feel sorry for him, even considering my own
   predicament.

           “Andrew, was it?” I inquired politely. “Would it be alright if I
   asked you a question?”

           “Uhm...” He started stacking the bowls gently. “Yes?”

           “Why is it in every hostage situation where there are partners,
   one of them is a ruthless asshole, and the other one is an actual human
   being?” I smiled at him mischievously. “Am I supposed to show you the
   magic of friendship and redeem you or something? Because I can totally do
   that you know, pony and stuff.”

           He stopped what he was doing and just stared at me. There wasn’t a
   flicker of mirth or agitation. If anything he seemed a little confused.
   “Not yet,” he replied softly.

           He looked down at his watch to check the time, and I decided to
   take this opportunity and build a foundation for myself as spooky and
   wise.

           “It’s 7:48.”

           He stared at his watch and then looked back up at me. “How did you
   know that?” Again, no emotion, just confusion.

           “I’m turning into a pony princess that is partially responsible
   for controlling day and night, and you’re surprised that I can tell what
   time it is?”

   Andrew nodded as if that explained everything, which I suppose technically
   it had. He moved over to the large bowl and then looked back up at me.

   “Are you sick?”

   A hint of concern? I’ll bite. “Not anymore,” I replied.

           “Okay.” He placed the stacked bowls into the large pot. Then stood
   up and made way for the door. He hesitated there, though. “Is it true? Do
   you have that mark, I mean?” He looked at the floor like he was breaking
   some kind of rule. “Edward looked you over when he brought you here, but I
   didn’t think it was very polite to do the same... Guess it seemed
   unnecessary.”

           “What, you mean my cutiemark?”

           He nodded slowly. “If that’s what you call it, I guess.”

           I pulled at the waistband of my shorts and lowered them just
   enough for him to see the crescent moon and night sky on my thigh. He
   blinked in amazement.

           “You are touched by the goddess...” He made some kind of gesture
   and bowed his head according to some practice I didn’t recognize.

           “Psh... Implying I’m not the moon goddess.” I replied. “Or at
   least as close as this place is going to get.” I lifted my wrists up and
   emphasized the makeshift manacles. “I showed you my little coming of age
   mark, what are these for?”

           “They’re iron, Edward thinks they’ll dampen your magic and keep
   him safe.”

           “And what do you think? Am I some mean Fairy that is going to
   carry you away from your family?”

           He shook his head, once again emotionless. “I think they’re not
   cold-iron, so it wouldn’t matter if you were.”

           He turned, opened the door, and left. About thirty minutes later
   he came back in with fresh supplies. The water was a bit cleaner and cold
   instead of room temperature, and the salad had dressing on it and a
   plastic fork to go with it. He placed all of these down on the floor just
   out of reach, and stopped.

           “Edward says you can move things with your horn now. He told me to
   make you use your magic.” He turned back to the doorway to see if anyone
   was watching. Then he scooted the salad and water a bit closer with his
   foot.

           He left the room in silence and closed the door behind him. I
   shook my head and spoke to the room, or myself.

           “Why is there one in every story?”

           They didn’t come at night, and I was curious why that was. Surely
   Andrew had to be one who would celebrate the night, and Edward seemed far
   too driven for sleep. I wondered if he was making any progress with his
   little experiments.

           My primary concern was cabin fever. I tried to get some sleep to
   escape the worst of it, but as soon as that sun went down sleep was just
   impossible. I was far from unengaged, though. I could feel the moon move
   through the sky all on its own. It was like watching your kid learn to
   ride a bicycle, and made me feel strangely homesick.

           I was curled up on my side to accommodate my increasingly pony
   body, though at the moment my new hooves were still the only change. At
   around midnight wisps of light fur began streaking there way up from my
   hooves. An hour later it was hard to tell where the hard nail of my hoof
   ended and the fur began. It was starting to look a bit less unnatural, and
   I was honestly a bit relieved. I was worried I would look weird and I
   don’t know... A bit more realistic than what is depicted in the show? That
   did not seem to be the case. Heck, even the colour had an usual cast to
   it. The colour just didn’t feel like it belonged here with everything
   else.

           As I mentioned, I wasn’t bored. I was quite content to lay there
   tuned into the moon like some kind of mystery transmission. My horn was
   growing along with the fur, I could tell. If I concentrated enough I could
   almost feel it winding its way out like a corkscrew through my skull. It
   was developing a pretty nasty point, too. That would be a pretty handy
   weapon if Edward couldn’t find a way to deal with it first.

           By the time dawn began its approach, my legs were almost
   completely covered in fur. The growth was strangely comforting and
   reminded me of how ticklish I was. I laughed more than a few times, and
   when it reached the point where it started to overlap with my cutie mark,
   I took a look at it. It was perfect, I don’t really know how else to put
   it. It was like my cutie mark had sat in the center of a blank canvas, and
   now the rest of that was being filled in. They fit together perfectly. My
   legs bent to take on a much more appropriate shape around the same time,
   and I stopped bothering with the whole walk like a human thing. It’s a
   good thing I wasn’t able to escape, because well... I wouldn’t have been
   able to escape anyway.

           The sun was officially up when I felt a sharp stab in my back. I
   did my best to take off my shirt and take a look. because of the chain
   around my neck, my shirt was now abandoned and sent down the length of the
   chain until it was against the support beam.

   A pair of tiny wings were growing from my back, which definitely explained
   the pain. They weren’t growing out from the top, you know, like a pair of
   angel wings or whatever? These were almost actually coming from my sides,
   in the middle. I was pretty sure that once they were finished growing
   their proper home would be tucked in along my sides, not along my back.

           ‘Wings! I can’t believe I’m going to have wings again!’

           ‘I mean... I can’t believe I’m going to have wings for the first
   time ever.’

           When Andrew came in at around 10:16, he found me curled up on top
   of the comforter as if I were a pony already. The lower half of my body
   was totally equine, and my tail flicked about like a slow metronome. His
   eyes widened when he saw my wings, the same way they had widened when he
   saw my cutiemark. I didn’t blame him. They were starting to get pretty
   big, I could even move them a little bit, and I stretched them out a bit
   just to display them with pride.

           The sun was streaming in through a skylight, and was already
   starting to put me to sleep. So I wasn’t much for conversation. He
   replaced the food and water in my bowls and made to leave.

           “Thank you.” I whispered politely.

           He just nodded in an embarrassed and awkward fashion, then left.

           It was getting really hard to use my hands. I couldn’t manipulate
   the provided fork with them, and I was really glad to have my horn
   already, because I just didn’t have the face structure to be eating
   directly from the bowl. I couldn’t do much yet, but I could move things
   around. All it took was a little imagination on my part. That mysterious
   transmission was a good teacher, and I snatched up the fork in a gravity
   all my own. The salad may have been cheap, but it was tasting better
   increasingly, and I noticed more good stuff was finding its way in. This
   time there were even cucumbers.

           I shuddered, picked those out, and hid them. I couldn’t really put
   my hoof on it, but I just didn’t want to eat them. I also didn’t want
   Andrew to know I hated his little offering. The rest of the salad was
   delicious, and grinding it down between my teeth was taking less and less
   effort. Those must have changed too. I was going to need to brush them
   soon, I wondered if I could get Andrew to smuggle me in a toothbrush.

           I finished my dinner and smiled before curling up around my
   comforter. I knew I should probably be a little more pissed off, a little
   more afraid, but it was getting really hard. Everything felt perfect,
   everything was just... eventual. I didn’t need to worry about my human
   life anymore, I was a captive, for the time being I reminded myself. My
   mother’s deep seated childhood issues weren’t my problem anymore. John
   wasn’t my problem anymore. Robert was...

           I started to cry, gentle tears streamed down my face and I pulled
   the blanket a little tighter between my curled hands. How could I let
   myself be calm like this? My brother was probably dead because of me. I
   was a terrible sister, and I deserved to be locked away like this.

           I dwelled on those thoughts and slowly fell into sleep. That cold
   feeling from before was more intense than ever, and even the warmth of my
   cutiemark seemed faint in comparison.

           That crater again, my sanctuary. The moon wasn’t in the sky
   though, it was at my feet. I lifted a forehoof and inspected it curiously.
   It was difficult to imagine, but hadn’t that been something else recently?

           Ah, a dream then.

           I cantered around the little cell and felt that it was altogether
   familiar. I rested on my haunches and considered. I did not think I would
   be able to fly up and out, that did not seem possible to me in the context
   of the dream.

           The dial was as recondite as ever, the shadow that it cast was now
   much closer to the circle that was purely a pony. I must have struggled
   with it for hours, but I could neither change it, nor discern its purpose.

           Then the sun began to rise, and its light poured into my cell. So
   not a dream then, a nightmare. I did my best to puzzle out an escape, but
   there was none. I had no friends here, no family with dreams I could
   escape to.

           The dial twisted and melted into liquid night again, and just like
   before it swept toward me like a tide. I didn’t even bother resisting this
   time. When it reached me I was curled up in a ball, and I stayed that way
   when it dragged me under.

           It was cold, very cold, but once again that wasn’t such a bad
   thing after the heat of the sun. I drifted in that place for longer than I
   could count. Sometimes it felt like I had to take a breath, so I did, and
   I breathed it in.

           It hurt at first, it felt a bit like I was choking. I am reminded
   of the first time I tried Greek yogurt, and how difficult it was to
   swallow. The suffocating feeling was something I could press on through,
   but not the series of sharp pains in my side and belly. My eye twitched
   and I felt at once enraged and terrified.

           The darkness melted away, but I still had more than a bit of it
   with me, and with determination born of anger, I rose to meet the sun.

           “Wake up you stupid horse!” That was what I had the good fortune
   to wake up to. That and Edward’s boot against my side. It hurt, but not a
   lot. Either I was made of stronger stuff now, or he just wasn’t very
   strong. It could be a little bit of both, I snorted.

           “Hey! Watch her wing!” Andrew called out with concern. Guess he
   does have a will of his own. So he wasn’t being mind controlled then, good
   for him.

           “Like I give a fuck about her wing! We need to figure out how to
   get this stuff to work! She can use magic and we can’t! I’ve seriously
   tried everything, I even went full on Harry Potter and used her tail hair
   for a wand core!”

           It was nighttime now, the moon was already in the sky, and shining
   directly down through the skylight to greet me. It was full. I was full
   too, I noted. My hands were gone, my face was utterly alien, and I was
   covered with fur all over. I rose to my hooves and battled with another
   bout of vertigo. It wouldn’t be dignified to lose my lunch right here in
   front of this villain. I stretched my wings and yawned.

           “What the hell do you want, Ed?” I ran a hoof through the fur
   along my side to clean it of some dirt that had come loose from his boot.
   “We are trying to get our beauty sleep.”

           “Don’t get all royal we on me! I want answers.” He grabbed a chair
   that was new to the room and moved to sit down. I turned my head and
   inspected a hoof demurely, my horn lit up and the chair scooted an inch or
   two behind him. He crashed onto the ground with a yelp.

           “I don’t have any answers, at least not the ones you’re looking
   for.” I turned back to face him. “You’re just human, as far as I know. It
   sure does suck to be you.” I looked around the room and took a few paces
   forward. My shorts must have come loose during the transformation, because
   they collapsed into a pile behind me. “Look at all of this wasted
   effort...” He looked up at me from the floor, his face was incredibly red
   at this point. “It’s all bullshit, you know? There’s no magic in any of
   this. You wouldn’t know a friend if it bit you on the ass.”

           He jumped to his feet and pulled out that metal bar from before,
   the one he had used on my brother. I was faintly aware that Andrew was
   saying something, but I couldn’t hear it over Edward’s red rage of
   terrible revenge.

           “I am not in the mood for your arrogant princess bullshit! I’ll
   get the information I need if I have to cripple you for it!”

           I didn’t even have time to think. I flapped my wings once out of
   fear and took a step back, but he tackled me to the ground and started
   hitting me in the head over and over again with the bar. He didn’t seem to
   know where to aim the blow, but quantity was starting to make up for
   quality of hits. I was getting dizzy real fast, and cold all over. I
   reached up with a hoof to feel for the necklace Robert had given me, but
   it was gone. I dimly recalled losing it at the cliffs.

           Edward finally got off of me and dropped the bar onto the ground,
   there were a few traces of blood on it from where he’d managed to break
   the skin on my head. He was hyperventilating and looked like he was about
   to pass out.

           “Andrew, go get me the hacksaw...” He weezed out.

           But nothing happened.

           “Andrew, go get me the hacksaw, now.”

           He turned to focus his attention on his accomplice, but as it
   turned out, Andrew was nowhere to be seen.

           “Oh you son of a bitch!” Edward was back on his feet again and
   going full throttle. He stopped in the doorway and sneered at me. “Don’t
   you go anywhere Princess! I’ll be right back!”

           I didn’t go anywhere, and he was back a few minutes later while I
   was still struggling to clear my head. I saw the glint of metal, it was a
   blinding light, just like the sun. He was taunting me again, but I
   couldn’t quite make it out. Everything was so cold, I was sinking into a
   pool of ice water, and when the sharp edge of metal was placed against the
   base of my horn, it exploded.

           This was not a dream, I was sinking in that pool of liquid
   darkness for real this time. The harsh presence of metal didn’t exist. I
   heard a clattering sound. My cuffs and the chain around my neck clattered
   to the ground uselessly. They had nothing to hold onto anymore, I was
   insubstantial, just a cloud of dark night air.

           Just a nightmare.