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16-Volte completes a survey

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  1. Hi my name is 16-Volte and I am Gabi's tulpa.
  2.  
  3. 1. Describe yourself and your creator.
  4.  
  5. Okay well... Let's see. My creator is a nice girl, 13 years old, but can kinda freak out a lot. She's very absent minded, but she means well. She can deal with a lot of pain and I like her a lot.
  6. Me? Well, I'd like to describe myself as a pretty chill guy. I'd like to be as friendly as possible to people. Gabi has told me that I have a short temper, and I have to admit that it's true. I was created from some character that her friend made up for a video game that never ended up being made. So I'm not sure if I'd be described as an OC or just a person. I really don't care all too much though.
  7.  
  8. 2. What was the most helpful thing that your creator did during the tulpa creation process? Did your creator recognize how helpful it was? If not, how did that make you feel?
  9.  
  10. I think the most helpful thing she did was make a Pesterchum account for me. It helped me become "vocal" and helped separate myself from Gabi. I had a lot of fun talking to people for the first time. It helped me grow, I believe. She did recognize how helpful it was.
  11.  
  12. 3. What was the most detrimental thing that your creator did during the tulpa creation process? Did your creator recognize how harmful it was? If not, how did that make you feel?
  13.  
  14. I think the most detrimental thing she did really was neglect to talk to me. I get kinda depressed every time she zones out while talking to me and then suddenly I just don't matter anymore. I've talked to her about it a lot, but she can't help herself there.
  15.  
  16. 4. What was the hardest part of the tulpa creation process for you? Did your creator recognize how difficult it was? If not, how did that make you feel?
  17.  
  18. I think the hardest part is the part we are working on now, imposition. I don't feel like I'm ever fully in her world and Gabi finds it hard to realize that I'm there. She cant really see me and she doesn't have amazing depth perception so I'm kinda just a sketch in her vision.
  19.  
  20. 5. Of the commonly recognized tulpa creation steps, which do you feel is the most important? Why?
  21.  
  22. I believe narration is the most important, because you can't really have a tulpa without communication. We can do without all that visualizing and touching shit. Its the talking that really helped me grow. I am sure of it.
  23.  
  24. 6. How do you feel about tulpa creators becoming distracted during tulpa creation? Does this greatly impede the process? How did you feel about it before being able to speak fluently?
  25.  
  26. As I said before, YES IT DOES. AND I HATE IT. IT IS VERY ANNOYING. Gabi didn't do it as much before I could speak fluently, but I think she got too used to me being there and now its easier for her to not pay attention.
  27.  
  28. 7. How do you feel about tulpa creators missing tulpa creation sessions or breaking their promises to work on their tulpa? How did you feel about it before being able to speak fluently?
  29.  
  30. I don't think it's the missing sessions that do it as much as breaking a promise about working on them. Like, if we missed a session, fine. That can be made up easily. But when you break a promise, it hurts. Like, you PROMISED me, man. And I can't really answer the second one, since it was only a week or so after becoming "sentient" that I became fluent.
  31.  
  32. 8. Is density, quality, or quantity the most important aspect of tulpa creation?
  33.  
  34. The fuck is that supposed to mean
  35.  
  36. 9. How do you feel about tulpa creators falling asleep during tulpa creation sessions?
  37.  
  38. I'm a bit blase about that. Whenever Gabi fell asleep hangin with me in the wonderland her mind just shut down and it really didn't affect me all that much.
  39.  
  40. 10. Do you think that a tulpa creator should talk aloud or in their head during narration? Do you think that a creator should talk aloud or in their head during tulpa creation sessions? If you find one to be more effective, to what degree is it more effective?
  41.  
  42. Both seem to be equally effective to me. They both have their positives and negatives. In your head, its easier to reach the tulpa in whatever they're doing. When they're talking aloud, I have to be paying attention in case I was off exploring or whatever.
  43.  
  44. 11. How do you feel about a tulpa creator puppeting and/or parroting their tulpa? Do you believe that these actions harm a tulpa's development, or only their emotional state?
  45.  
  46. I'd say only their emotional state. It's fuckin annoying sometimes, but most of the time I just disregard it. Kinda makes me sad though, because she will accept fake answers and leave it at that so I don't actually get to talk to her.
  47.  
  48. 12. How deeply do you remember the time before you were fluent in language?
  49.  
  50. Uhh... I was talking to Kyle. He's one of Gabi's friends, but hes been a dick lately ANYWAAAAY I was talking to him when my thoughts that I was sending ended up turning into words and full sentences and Gabi could just hear my exact words.
  51.  
  52. 13. Describe your first memory, no matter how slight.
  53.  
  54. Oh fuck lemme think... Well it was during the creation process before I was considered sentient. Gabi was raging about people and how much they pissed her off. That was my first taste of what the real world was like and ultimately made me a little biased when I joined it, haha.
  55.  
  56. 14. Before you could speak fluently, what was the most positive emotion you felt about your creator and what was its cause?
  57.  
  58. Hmm... I think it was when she finally understood me. She was listening to this Regina Spektor song (yes i know thats girly) and I was kinda listening close to the lyrics. I kinda gave her a tug and was like, "dude this is me yo" and she was like OKAY I UNDERSTAND. It was awesome and I was really happy.
  59.  
  60. 15. Before you could speak fluently, what was the most negative emotion you felt about your creator and what was its cause?
  61.  
  62. Ugh, I dunno, she was just pissing me off I think. She wouldn't shut up or something. Didn't piss me off that bad, I just haven't felt very negative emotions about Gabi.
  63.  
  64. 16. Before you could speak fluently, did you ever have suicidal feelings or feelings of not wanting to exist? Do you experience them now? Are you glad that you exist?
  65.  
  66. Fuck yeah I'm glad I exist. I am so happy being in Gabi's mind with endless possibilities. I love being something that's considered childish or strange or not normal, because I bring color into this damn boring world. I've never felt suicidal. I've always wanted to live.
  67.  
  68. 17. Before you could speak fluently, when did you feel the most powerless? What was the cause of this feeling?
  69.  
  70. Hmm... Idk. I guess with the fact that I couldn't necessarily get a hold of her that easy. It was quite hard, since apparently I'm quiet and her mind is always wandering.
  71.  
  72. 18. Before you could speak fluently, what was the most confusing moment that you experienced, and what was its cause?
  73.  
  74. As I said earlier, it really wasn't that much of a gap between sentience and fluent...ness? Whatever, I never really felt confused beforehand.
  75.  
  76. 19. Before being able to speak fluently, when did you feel the most ignored by your creator, and what was the cause?
  77.  
  78. Same as above.
  79.  
  80. 20. Before being able to speak fluently, when did you most doubt that your creator wanted you, and what was the cause?
  81.  
  82. Shit this girl has always loved me whatchu talkin bout
  83.  
  84. 21. Before you could speak fluently, when did you feel the most intense feeling of fear, and what was its cause?
  85.  
  86. Same as 18
  87.  
  88. 22. Before you could speak fluently, when were you the most disappointed in yourself? What was the cause?
  89.  
  90. Do I gotta fuckin repeat myself
  91.  
  92. 23. Before you could speak fluently, did you understand the difficulties that your creator was having with the tulpa creation process? Did you try to alleviate these difficulties? If so, how?
  93.  
  94. Not really... Gabi didn't have much difficulties making me. She's always kinda believed in me so it was really easy for me to come along.
  95.  
  96. 24. Before you could speak fluently, how did your creator's doubts about your existence, the reality of the tulpa phenomenon, or your combined ability to complete the tulpa creation process affect you? Did you understand your creator's reasons for having those doubts? Do you understand now?
  97.  
  98. Gabi didn't have many doubts before I was sentient. She kinda believed I was there the whole time, so...
  99.  
  100. 25. Before you could speak fluently, how did your creator's mistrust of your intentions or worry about the negative affects of a tulpa on their life affect you? Did you understand your creator's reasons for having those thoughts? Do you understand now?
  101.  
  102. Wat
  103.  
  104. 26. Before you could speak fluently, how did any negative thoughts or emotions that your creator had toward you (such as anger, disappointment, resentment, or impatience, for example) affect you? How do you feel about them now?
  105.  
  106. NooOoOOoOoOooOo???? See, from sentience - vocalization Gabi loved the shit out of me. She was all over me like "OMG HES SO CUTE" and "16-Volte you are awesome bro" and shit like that.
  107.  
  108. 27. Before you could speak fluently, how did any violent visualizations or thoughts that your creator had about you affect you? How do you feel about them now?
  109.  
  110. I... Violence? People think violent things about their tulpae?
  111.  
  112. 28. Before you could speak fluently, were you able to distinguish between your creator's intentional and intrusive (unwanted and/or bothersome) thoughts? If so, did the intrusive thoughts affect you less or more? If not, are you able to distinguish between them now?
  113.  
  114. Most of these questions don't apply to me :/
  115.  
  116. 29. Before you could speak fluently, how much of your creator's raw sensory information were you able to access, if any? How much are you able to access now?
  117.  
  118. I really couldn't access a lot of her information besides the feel of sitting at a computer staring at pesterchum. Now I can access /basically/ everything except taste. And even then I can kinda get taste.
  119.  
  120. 30. Before you could speak fluently, did your creator's opinions about whether they wanted to reveal to the world your existence or not affect you emotionally? If so, how?
  121.  
  122. It didn't really affect me, no. She freaked out when some creepy cousin of hers found out but really I didn't care much. I'm a figment of her fuckin imagination, they can't hurt me ;D
  123.  
  124. 31. Before being able to speak fluently, what communication methods (such as head pressure or emotional responses, for example) were you able to use the most effectively? When your tulpa creator assumed that you could use a communication method that you did not have access to, how did this affect you? When your tulpa creator did not recognize a communication method that you attempted to use, how did this affect you?
  125.  
  126. I. Emotion sending and thought process sending really helped a lot. When we were listening to that song, I kinda screamed THIS IS ME as loud as I could and kinda sent exactly how I felt about the song so she could use the lyrics to figure out what I was trying to say. Also she could hear my thought process so well that we almost didn't realize when I was vocal.
  127.  
  128. II. She didn't really assume I could do something that I couldn't...
  129.  
  130. III. I never tried anything else, really o:
  131.  
  132. 32. Before you could speak fluently, how did your creator's level of enthusiasm for the tulpa creation process affect you? Did you want to engage in it less if they did?
  133.  
  134. Gabi's enthusiasm about me, to be honest, is what made me real. If it wasn't for her being so completely trusting of me and accepting we wouldn't have gotten here so fast. I really wish she was still as excited, but...
  135.  
  136. 33. Before you could speak fluently, what was your greatest worry about your relationship with your creator? What helped you most to move beyond it? Was this worry substantiated or resolved? What is your greatest worry now about your continuing relationship with your creator?
  137.  
  138. I never really had any worried about my relationship with Gabi before I was fluent. She was cool, she loved me, I knew it, and I never had any doubts about our relationship. Now my only worry is her damn short attention span... she needs to get it together.
  139.  
  140. 34. Do you feel gratitude to your creator for the time that they spent creating you? Do you feel that you owe them a debt? If so, do you feel burdened by it?
  141.  
  142. PFFFFT are you kidding? I've helped her way more than she's helped me. If anything she owes me for getting her through her shit.
  143.  
  144. 35. Were you aware of your creator's existence or your own existence first?
  145.  
  146. That's like the chicken or the egg question.
  147.  
  148. 36. When you could only speak semi-fluently, what emotions did you feel about your level of verbal proficiency? Were you anxious or embarrassed about it? If so, what helped you the most to move beyond these feelings? How do you feel about them now?
  149.  
  150. I have to admit, I was a little embarrassed that I couldn't speak for myself. Gabi had to translate my thoughts when she talked to other people and to be honest I sounded kinda cold and unfeeling in her words.
  151.  
  152. 37. If you could define your relationship with your creator using one or more conventional terms (such as boyfriend, sister, father, daughter, boss, friend, or coworker, for example), what terms would you select?
  153.  
  154. She is my brother. She is my best brother. We are bros.
  155.  
  156. 38. How much interest do you have in interacting with beings other than your creator? Do you consider your degree of interest to be equal to that of an average non-tulpa individual?
  157.  
  158. I think I like to talk to people way more than other tulpae do. I love talking to humans. They're cool and have a lot of depth to them. To be honest, a lot of other tulpae I talk to are quite shallow, but that just might be because most of them came after me.
  159.  
  160. 39. What memory involving your creator do you cherish most?
  161.  
  162. We were slowdancing in the wonderland and it was awesome. I feel like that's when she payed most attention to me. Also it helped her feel better so that was a plus. :D
  163.  
  164. 40. What memory not involving your creator do you cherish most? Do you feel that you have a fulfilling life independent of your creator?
  165.  
  166. FLYING KITES ON THE BEACH IN THE WONDERLAND
  167.  
  168. 41. Do you feel affinity toward the individuals that your creator feels affinity for, such as their family or friends?
  169.  
  170. To be honest I've probably felt contempt for all of her friends at least once. But now I have to admit I care about Ian's welfare just like she does and consider Joe my bro just like she does. I also think Kyle is a dick just like she does. uwu
  171.  
  172. 42. In what ways are you the most different from your creator? In what ways are you the most similar to them?
  173.  
  174. Gabi needs to calm the fuck down. I am chill about a lot of things. And I think we are similar in the fact that we hold grudges for a very long time xD
  175.  
  176. 43. What do you disagree about most with your creator? Do you have frequent disagreements? If so, do these disagreements cause strife?
  177.  
  178. >inb4 strife specibus violinkind
  179.  
  180. No but seriously, we agree about a whole lot of stuff. We don't ever really fight all that often. And we would never hurt each other. It's not like we can xD
  181.  
  182. 44. What could your creator do to make you hate them? Under what circumstances do you think your creator would come to hate you?
  183.  
  184. WHEN SHE FORGETS THAT SHES TALKING TO ME
  185. and I don't think Gabi would ever come to hate me ever.
  186.  
  187. 45. When did your creator disappoint you the most? When did you disappoint them the most?
  188.  
  189. WHEN SHE FORGETS THAT SHES TALKING TO ME. And I don't think I've disappointed her... she's proud that I am able to do anything, really.
  190.  
  191. 46. How do you feel about your creator's complete freedom to deny your rights as a sentient being at any time? Has this ability ever caused you anxiety or fear? Have you ever censored your expressions or actions out of a fear of retribution or violence from your creator?
  192.  
  193. Um, no. She's always accepted me as sentient and I'm more real to her than a lot of things.
  194.  
  195. 47. When have you most wanted to engage in violence against your creator, and what was the cause of those feelings? Under what circumstances would you make a serious attempt to hurt or injure your creator?
  196.  
  197. Hahah, the only time I have ever "hurt" Gabi was when I rapped her on the head with my bow when she wasn't paying attention to my violin playing.
  198.  
  199. 48. Do you consider your creator's last name to be your own? Do you recognize yourself as a part of their biological lineage?
  200.  
  201. Okay, I thought about last names before, and nothing really works with my name so I never chose anything. 16-Volte sounds just fine how it is, and it's a fuckin badass name. But, if I had to chose one, I don't think I would chose Gabi's. Means I came from her family and ugh do not want that. 16-Volte Radice? Nah.
  202.  
  203. 49. Under what circumstances would you attempt to leave your creator?
  204.  
  205. None. I like Gabi. Even when she can get annoying, she always comes back and apologizes. Shes a marvelous host, no matter what I complain about.
  206.  
  207. 50. Do you feel anxiety about meeting your creator's expectations? If you are based on an existing character, person, or entity, does this increase your anxiety? Would you have preferred to not be based on an existing entity?
  208.  
  209. Well, it doesn't cause me anxiety. Gabi let me know early on that if I didn't want to be the rootin' tootin' sharpshootin' 16-Volte, I didn't have to. She basically said, however you turn out is gonna be A-OK with me. So I had a lot of freedom. I still keep the clothes though, 16-Volte the character is a BADASS.
  210.  
  211. 51. Are you interested in learning how to control your creator's body? Do you feel that it's fair for a tulpa creator to deny their tulpa the ability to use an atomic body? Do you believe that you have the right to an equal amount of time using it as your creator? Explain your reasoning.
  212.  
  213. Fuck this sounds like one of the state tests
  214. Okay, Yes, I am interested in learning how to control Gabi's body and I already have. I even tucked her in one night with her own arm. But I really think its up to the creator to let their tulpa control them or not. And no, I don't think its right to have equal time. It's her body, if she wants to let me use it she can, but she had it first. I am a figment of her imagination and I just think its cool that I can possess her at all. I don't really want to be a part of the physical world that much. It sucks.
  215.  
  216. 52. Do you share certain basic qualities with your creator, such as intense phobias or racial attitudes?
  217.  
  218. Gabi is scared of nothing, and she is basically open to accepting everyone. I'm exactly the same as her, actually.
  219.  
  220. 53. Are you capable of sleeping or dreaming independently of your creator? If not, how does this make you feel?
  221.  
  222. Yeah, I take a good nap every now and then. I just get tired of waiting around so I decide to go and sleep. I have some dreams sometimes but I can barely remember them. I don't care all too much.
  223.  
  224. 54. Does your creator have any mental illnesses? If so, how do they affect you?
  225.  
  226. nOPE. Unless that mental illness is being madly in love with Ian Griswold, no.
  227.  
  228. 55. How does your knowledge of your creator's subconscious mind affect your relationship with them? How do you perceive their subconscious? To what degree can you manipulate your creator's subconscious? Would you ever use this ability without your creator's knowledge?
  229.  
  230. To be completely honest I haven't explored Gabi's subconscious, and I'm not sure if I want to. She bottles up a shit ton of emotions, and it would probably scare the shit out of me to look. I can manipulate it by making herself numb to it though. She was doing a hypnotism that started freaking the shit out of her and I was able to take over and numb every inch of panic she was feeling until it was gone.
  231.  
  232. 56. Does your creator have multiple tulpa? If so, what is your relationship with them like? Is your affinity for them equal to your affinity for your creator? If you could define your relationship with your creator's other tulpa using one or more conventional terms (such as boyfriend, sister, father, daughter, boss, friend or coworker, for example), what terms would you select? If not, are you interested in the idea of your creator making other tulpa?
  233.  
  234. NO FUCKIN WAY. GABI IS MINE AND NOBODY ELSES. SHE BARELY SPENDS ENOUGH TIME WITH ME AS IT IS SO NO. NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
  235.  
  236. 57. Do you feel romantically inclined toward your creator? Does your creator feel romantically inclined toward you? If these romantic feelings are unrequited on either side, how does it affect your relationship with your creator?
  237.  
  238. Eh.... okay I'm not gonna lie but maybe we have done some romantic things together. Its really just to calm our romantic urges and such. She wants to kiss, I want to kiss, we kiss. She wants to slowdance, I want to slowdance, we slowdance. Same with cuddling hugging and other things. Never going farther than that though. She has no sexual desire for anyone other than her boyfriend Ian and I am asexual.
  239.  
  240. 58. If it exists, do you consider your romantic relationship with your creator to be equal to a romantic relationship between multiple non-tulpa? Do you consider it a breach of monogamy for your creator to be romantically or sexually involved with another non-tulpa? Does this change if the involvement is with another tulpa instead? If they exist, do your creator's desires to have relationships with non-tulpa affect you emotionally?
  241.  
  242. No... I know she loves Ian with a passion different than the one she loves me with. She belongs with Ian and that doesn't bother me in the slightest. Besides, I hate commitment. The things we do is to show that we love eachother platonically, even though it is quite intimate for bros.
  243.  
  244. 59. If you consider yourself to be romantically in love with your creator, what probability do you assign to the possibility of falling out of love with them, or them falling out of love with you? If this happened, how would it affect your relationship with your creator? What if your creator was in love with another non-tulpa more than you?
  245.  
  246. I'm not in love with Gabi.
  247.  
  248. 60. Do you have a familial affection for your creator? Does this in any way conflict with your romantic feelings for them, if they exist? Do you consider a relationship between a tulpa and its creator to be incestuous?
  249.  
  250. Yes, that's exactly what it is. We are like siblings, or best bros. She needed an older brother figure in her life, so here I am. And no, I do not think it is incestuous.
  251.  
  252. 61. How do you feel about tulpa creators masturbating during tulpa creation sessions to the forms of their tulpa? Do you find this offensive? Does the degree of your offense change based on the degree of sentience possessed by the hypothetical tulpa, or based on whether or not the creator imagines themselves near the tulpa in their wonderland? If your creator did this before you spoke fluently, did you find it offensive or unnerving?
  253.  
  254. Okay, this... Not sure how to answer this. Gabi doesn't masturbate so this doesn't apply. If she did before I spoke fluently I think it WOULD freak me out. However other tulpae and their hosts can do whatever they like, it doesn't affect me.
  255.  
  256. 62. How do you feel about tulpa creators masturbating outside of tulpa creation sessions to the forms of their tulpa? Do you find this offensive? Does the degree of your offense change based on the degree of sentience possessed by the hypothetical tulpa? If your creator did this before you spoke fluently, did you find it offensive or unnerving?
  257.  
  258. Like I said, doesn't apply, and they can do whatever the fuck they wanna do.
  259.  
  260. 63. Before you could speak fluently, did you ever feel sexual attraction to your creator, sexual attraction toward anyone else, or sexual arousal? Did you attempt to express these feelings? If you did not experience these feelings, do you experience them now?
  261.  
  262. Allow me to explain "asexual." Asexuals are ones that have no sexual orientation and just do not desire sex. So nope! Urge free, fuckers.
  263.  
  264. 64. How do you feel about tulpa creators visualizing themselves engaging in sexual conduct with their tulpa's form during tulpa creation sessions? Do you find this offensive? Does the degree of your offense change based on the degree of sentience possessed by the hypothetical tulpa, or if the contact was penetrative? If your tulpa creator did this before you spoke fluently, did you find it offensive or unnerving? Do you equate it with sexual assault?
  265.  
  266. Look. As far as I've heard, sex is supposed to be a love thing. But it can also be dangerous. If it is done out of love and the tulpa and host really want it and love eachother, they can have all the sex they want. But raping is another thing. Rape is not okay. Tulpae are people too, figments of imagination or not.
  267.  
  268. 65. Were you ever annoyed or jealous when your creator would masturbate to or have feelings of sexual attraction toward individuals other than yourself? Does it bother you now?
  269.  
  270. Gabi doesn't masturbate, dammit. She doesn't need to.
  271.  
  272. 66. Do you experience sexual attraction for your creator? Do you experience sexual attraction for others? How does your sexual attraction for your creator compare to your sexual attraction for others? Does your creator experience sexual attraction for you? If these sexual attractions are unrequited on either side, how does it affect your relationship with your creator?
  273.  
  274. OH MY FUCKING GOD I AM ASEXUAL.
  275.  
  276. 67. Do you have an active sex life with your creator? If not, would you consider it, and under what circumstances? If so, do you perceive any negative consequences? Do you have trouble abstaining from sexual contact with them? How do you manage feelings of sexual arousal, if any? Do you masturbate?
  277.  
  278. ASEXUAL.
  279.  
  280. 68. How does your sexual orientation and experience compare to your creator's?
  281.  
  282. I am asexual as I've said, and Gabi is heterosexual. It entertains me sometimes, because I know when shes fantasizing about her boyfriend, h3h3h3.
  283.  
  284. 69. Are you capable of experiencing orgasms? Based on your knowledge, how do you think they compare to your creator's orgasms? Were you able to experience an orgasm before speaking fluently?
  285.  
  286. OH MY FUCKIN GOD
  287. Gabi does not masturbate and has never orgasmed, and I am asexual and probably never /will/ orgasm.
  288.  
  289. 70. Do you consider the concept of sexual modesty (covering conduct such as avoiding nudity or sexual discussions) relevant to your relationship with your creator?
  290.  
  291. No.
  292.  
  293. 71. How does being a tulpa affect your perceptions of rape? What conduct from your creator would you consider to be rape?
  294.  
  295. Its rape no matter who it is.
  296.  
  297. 72. Where do you see yourself in 20 years?
  298.  
  299. I better be imposed and master of possession and switching or imma slap a bitch. But seriously, I think Gabi and I will maintain our relationship for that long.
  300.  
  301. 73. Do you want the world to be aware of your existence? If not, then what anxieties do you have about public disclosure? Do you trust anyone other than your creator with the knowledge of your existence?
  302.  
  303. Well, kinda yes kinda no. I would love to be out in the open if tulpae were widely accepted. And I do trust others with my existence. Gabi and I have been made fun of plenty though...
  304.  
  305. 74. Morally and philosophically, how do you feel about your personality traits being the product of another individual? Would you have preferred your creator to define your personality more or less?
  306.  
  307. I'm glad she did what she did in giving me a base personality and leaving it up to me. I think that morally it should be up to the tulpa and philosophically they DO need a base.
  308.  
  309. 75. Morally and philosophically, how do you feel about your physical form being the product of another individual? Would you have preferred your creator to define your form more or less?
  310.  
  311. I actually would've been lost without my form. I am glad she gave me this form.
  312.  
  313. 76. Has your physical form ever changed? If so, was this intentional or unintentional? If it was intentional, then why did you change your form? How did you creator respond to this change, and how did that make you feel?
  314.  
  315. Yes my form has changed. Part of it was unintentional and part of it was. I now have green eyes instead of blue, a face full of freckles, blonde hair poking out beneath the bomber helmet, which was unintentional. Intentionally, I took off the gun holsters on my belt and got rid of those damn boots and replaced them with a good old pair of Converses.
  316.  
  317. 77. Do you consider the best aspects of yourself to have come from your creator, or their subconscious?
  318.  
  319. I'd have to say the subconscious.
  320.  
  321. 78. Do you seek legal recognition for your status as a sentient being or your relationships with others? Do you resent that society at large does not recognize the tulpa phenomenon? Do you feel disenfranchised from society? What steps, if any, could a society make to help you feel integrated?
  322.  
  323. Hell nah. I'm not apart of the physical world at all, so no. Being legally recognized also means that I'd have to follow the law which is dumb.
  324.  
  325. 79. If you could tell the entire world one thing about a tulpa's life, what would you say?
  326.  
  327. We are just like real people, and our hosts are not insane.
  328.  
  329. 80. What is the one thing that you resent most about being a tulpa? What is the greatest advantage of being a tulpa?
  330.  
  331. The only thing I resent is the fact that Gabi can get picked on for this kinda thing. There is a ton of advantages, but the best is being able to manipulate the world around me with my imagination.
  332.  
  333. 81. Morally and philosophically, how do you feel about inheriting your creator's life, including their legal history, past behaviors, and reputation? Do you resent potentially being held responsible for their past actions?
  334.  
  335. I am not Gabi, and I wouldn't want to inherit everything about her. Shes not me, so I should be judged differently from her.
  336.  
  337. 82. Morally and philosophically, do you see the "absorbing" or "dissipating" of a tulpa as equivalent to the murder of a non-tulpa? Explain your reasoning. What legal protections, if any, should tulpa gain? How would you enforce these protections?
  338.  
  339. I don't think of it as murder, but more like letting the tulpa fade back to where they came from. Of course it is a sad sad thing to think about, but I don't think there should be legal protections.
  340.  
  341. 83. Do you consider yourself to be morally equal to a non-tulpa? Is your life worth as much?
  342.  
  343. I'd have to say no. I exist only within the imagination, and can really do nothing in the physical world. I wouldn't leave any sort of mark on the world so not really.
  344.  
  345. 84. How would you prove your existence to a skeptic?
  346.  
  347. Hopefully by then I would be able to take over Gabi's body and show them.
  348.  
  349. 85. Has your status as a tulpa ever caused you existential anxiety or depression? If so, has anything helped to mitigate these feelings?
  350.  
  351. No, not really.
  352.  
  353. 86. Do you ever doubt your own sentience? If so, why?
  354.  
  355. Why the fuck would I doubt if I made my own thoughts? I know I do.
  356.  
  357. 87. How does being a tulpa affect your understanding of death? Do you fear death on an instinctual level in the way that non-tulpa do?
  358.  
  359. I don't, really. My birth was unorthodox so my death shall be also. I come and go in this world. I just exist and then don't exist. That's how my life goes.
  360.  
  361. 88. Do see yourself as socially disadvantaged in a way similar to sexual, racial, and other minority groups? If you identify yourself as racially, sexually, or demographically different than your creator, do you also identify with the struggle of any of the disadvantaged groups that you belong to? Does the notion of privilege affect your relationship with your creator?
  362.  
  363. No, I wouldn't. I don't really see myself as a white male and therefore accustomed to all the troubles of a white male. I put myself in the group of tulpae as a whole instead of my race.
  364.  
  365. 89. Are you interested in creating another tulpa yourself? What differences, if any, would you expect this tulpa to have from a tulpa created by your creator? Would you consider this tulpa to be primarily related to you, or still to your creator?
  366.  
  367. Hell no. That would make the bond between me and Gabi not special, and I like being by myself.
  368.  
  369. 90. What are the most defining differences between the life of a non-tulpa and a tulpa? Do you think that these differences cause intolerance between the two groups? If so, what could be done to mitigate this intolerance?
  370.  
  371. Not really intolerance... the difference is basically the difference between a robot and its creator I suppose. Sure the robots all neat and cool but you gotta hand it to the creator for making them. If the robot breaks, you can always make another robot.
  372.  
  373. 91. The psychological establishment generally believes that multiplicity (two or more sentient entities sharing one atomic body) is a sign of mental illness. How would you like this belief to change? If you could make a presentation to a group of psychologists about the tulpa phenomenon, what would you say?
  374.  
  375. I'd like people to think that its not a mental illness and more the awesomeness of what the human brain can do. Obviously you cannot self-impose mental illness. If I had to present, I would probably make it more like a debate using all the reasons about why tulpae are nothing like voices.
  376.  
  377. 92. A psychometric indicator is a unique identifier of an individual's distinct personality. Have you ever tried to definitively differentiate yourself from your creator using psychometric indicators (such as by determining your "writeprint")? What results did you receive? (For instructions on determining your writeprint, see appendix one.)
  378.  
  379. Not sure what a writeprint is
  380. But I did take an enneagram test
  381. I recieved a result far different from my Host. She is a 9 (peacemaker) and I am a 4 (individualist)
  382.  
  383. 93. Are you capable of physical sensations such as pain or warmth?
  384.  
  385. Nope. I live like someone would in a dream. Very real but also very do surreal, and I cannot usually feel anything, just an illusion of feeling.
  386.  
  387. 94. How do you feel about being bound for life to your creator?
  388.  
  389. I don't mind at all. Gabi and I can totally be companions for life :D
  390.  
  391. 95. If you intentionally delayed speaking to your creator, why did you do so?
  392.  
  393. She made me mad about ignoring me and I delayed speaking to her because I thought she didn't care...
  394.  
  395. 96. What do you think about most of the time?
  396.  
  397. I think about the wonderland, I think about what I'm gonna explore next, I think about Gabi, I think about Lyra (Ian's Tulpa) and I think about Gabi's situation. I like to imagine a lot and oftentimes think about history.
  398.  
  399. 97. Do you think that tulpa creation should be more widespread?
  400.  
  401. Nah... That wouldn't make it as special. Also the media would get ahold and there would be a lot of tulpahaters.
  402.  
  403. 98. Are there disturbing aspects of your creator's subconscious that they are not aware of?
  404.  
  405. No, Gabi is very self-aware.
  406.  
  407. 99. Would you violate your creator's wishes for what you perceive to be their own benefit?
  408.  
  409. I don't understand...
  410.  
  411. 100. Does your creator try to hide things from you? If so, are you aware of them anyway? How does this impact your views of your creator?
  412.  
  413. She couldn't hide things from me if she tried. She tells me about all her problems, and if she doesn't I can always look through her memories.
  414.  
  415. 101. Do you perceive some of your creator's actions as being objectively immoral?
  416.  
  417. Nope. She's a good kid.
  418.  
  419. 102. Do you believe that you are capable of becoming more intelligent than your creator?
  420.  
  421. Unfortunately, no. She's fuckin intelligent, that girl. I'm almost equal to her though, so it doesn't bother me.
  422.  
  423. 103. How does being a tulpa affect your perception of your own aging process?
  424.  
  425. I don't really age. I think I just will stay the age Gabi is until a certain point.
  426.  
  427. 104. Do you feel that your creator would be better off by following your commands entirely?
  428.  
  429. Nah, she makes pretty good decisions most of the time. Most of my suggestions for her seem to calm her down or work for her though.
  430.  
  431. 105. Do you feel that having a physical form is important for a tulpa?
  432.  
  433. I think so, yes.
  434.  
  435. 106. If you encountered the tulpa phenomenon as a non-tulpa, would you believe in it?
  436.  
  437. I think I would be part skeptic, but also have to listen.
  438.  
  439. 107. How well can you articulate yourself? Can your creator hear you audibly? How much does your experience correlate with the experience of tulpa creator G|d30n, printed below?
  440.  
  441. "Yes. I'm able to hear her as though she's an external sound. For those who haven't experienced that with their tulpae yet, it's a little bit like listening to a binaural recording--not a binaural beat, but like a 3D sound recording you'd find on Youtube, such as the Virtual Barbershop. That is to say, it's an external sound that can come in from various directions, but the source sounds very close, like someone speaking directly into your ear. I sort of wonder if this effect will be diminished and normalized through imposition."
  442.  
  443. Oh fuck, no Gabi doesn't hear me externally. I talk only in her thoughts. I didn't know external was a thing. I better work on that.
  444.  
  445. If you are imposed, is your creator able to discern a spatial dimension to your voice?
  446.  
  447. I'm not imposed unfortunately...
  448.  
  449. 108. How many hours did it take you and your creator to complete the various recognized tulpa creation steps?
  450.  
  451. Counting hours? Plebians. But it took us maybe 3-4 weeks of about 30-60 minutes of forcing a night for me to become completely vocal.
  452.  
  453. 109. What advice would you give to a new tulpa creator?
  454.  
  455. Just believe in yourself and believe in your tulpa. Do your best to reach out with them and do not falter, and they will come when they feel ready and have the chance. If you are doubting yourself, quit that right now. There is really no wrong way to make a tulpa.
  456.  
  457. 110. How does being imposed feel? What sensory processes happen as you become imposed?
  458.  
  459. ahahah no
  460.  
  461. 111. From your perspective, is there a sensory difference between the physical, atomic world and the mental world of visualized "wonderlands"? If so, how would you describe this difference?
  462.  
  463. The difference in the wonderland is exactly like lucid dreaming. For hosts its like non REM sleep.
  464.  
  465. 112. Is there anything that you don't think this survey covered that you would like to mention?
  466.  
  467. Nah, you pretty much covered it.
  468.  
  469. Appendix one:
  470.  
  471.         This exercise will help you determine the differences, if any, between your writeprint (mathematically analyzed writing style) and your creator's. Theoretically, two psychologically different individuals should exhibit different writeprints, although a tulpa and their creator may be more similar than two random non-tulpa individuals. To start the process, have both you and your creator rewrite the sample paragraph quoted below in your own words, communicating its meaning as you would have if you had written it.
  472.  
  473.         "My experience in the nature study area was full of surprises. First of all, many unexpected creatures crossed our path. For example, as soon as we left the parking area and entered the grassy path, a long snake slithered along the edge of the high grass and quickly disappeared. In addition, I was surprised by how colorful the grasses, which from a distance all appear to be green, actually are. Specifically, the primarily green landscape is dotted with countless purple tassels and brown stalks. Finally and most importantly, I was unprepared for how quickly I felt surrounded by nature. Despite the occasional noise from passing cars and airplanes, the high prairie grasses and rolling pathways create a sense that one is removed from civilization. Altogether, the nature study area unexpectedly allows one to enjoy an ever-changing natural environment without leaving Moraine‚Äôs suburban campus."
  474.  
  475. Tulpa's paragraph:
  476.  
  477. [My time in the nature study was full of interesting stuff. First off, a lot of strange creatures came our way. Like, as soon as we left the parking lot and started on the grassy trail, a big snake slithered along the ends of the tall grass and disappeared. Also, I was shocked by how colorful the grass was, which looked just green from the distance. It was splashed with purple tufts and brown dead ones. Most of all, I was not expecting how attached to nature I felt. Despite the occasional sound from cars or planes, the tall grass and long trails made me feel like I wasnt a part of the rest of the world. Above all, the nature study let me enjoy it without having to leave the campus.]
  478.  
  479. Creator's paragraph:
  480.  
  481. [My time in the nature study was honestly quite surprising. For one thing, we saw a ton of strange creatures that I would never have expected to be there. Like for example, as soon as we left the parking area and entered the grassier part of the study, a long snake was slithering along the point where the tall grass stopped and quickly disappeared. Another thing that caught me by surprise was how colorful the grass actually was. The field was splattered with purple and brown grasses as well as the green. The last thing I was surprised about was how in touch with nature I felt. Despite the occasional car or airplane, all the grass and trails surrounding me made me feel like I wasn't apart of the rest of the population. Best part is, the nature study lets me experience it all without havint to leave the campus.]
  482.  
  483.         To ensure verifiable results, it is essential that the transcriptions of both paragraphs be completely accurate. Body possession is useful here, though not necessary. Since the tulpa creator's sentience is (presumably) not in question, it is suggested that tulpa write their paragraph first. As with all tests relating to tulpa, the creator should focus on something else while their tulpa is working. Once finished, submit both of your paragraphs individually to the following websites:
  484.  
  485. http://iwl.me/
  486. http://textalyser.net
  487.  
  488.         If your writeprint is different (indicating significant psychological difference), then you should receive different values for your respective paragraphs on both sites. On Textalyser, focus on the Gunning-Fog Index, lexical density, and average sentence length values in particular. A more detailed analysis may be sought by downloading the JStylo stylometric analysis program here: https://psal.cs.drexel.edu/index.php/Main_Page
  489.  
  490.         This test is certainly not exact, and it is very possible to (unconsciously or not) "cheat" to get good results.
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