bop it skip it Ready. jump it kay, all extraneous chat goes to #zuchat at this point -=INSANITY STARTO=- *You enter a vast void of absolute nothingness. Suddenly, Sephiroth dropkicks the DM.* BAGELPUSS BAGELPUSS BAGELPUSS * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in a Testicle Cover Guard tournament. «14,366») ..... lol And this is why I was scared going into this. REDO. * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in a tree. But, then you fell and landed in manure! «14,367») ouch POOP MOUNTAIN That is one big pile of shit. conductor of the poop train *Everyone finds themselves in the middle of a wasteland... literally. The smell is absolutely atrocious... so horrid, it may affect you on a rather painful level. Trying to move around in this manure doesn't seem to be working well either...* $4d8 DM: You rolled 4 Dice with 8 Sides. Result: 7, 1, 6 and 2. Total: 16. This is why I'm glad we Sheikah are given face masks. oh wait, just 3, derp * X_X is now known as RockGolem * X__X is now known as ArmoredStalfos (Note: Because I am running Vincent -AND- Sephiroth tonight, I cannot run any enemies.) (poop golem?) * Red_Enrics is a janitor this time. ^_^ * X___X is now known as Firerobe I've smelled worse *A myraid of unsightly brown-colored enemies appear. They appear to be suffering as well, but since they can't find the exact cause of it, they're blaming you all.* *Roll initiatives!* init $1d10 wait i forgot how $init 1d11 $init 1d10 Kirran: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 1. Red_Enrics: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 3. $init 1d10 DAMMIT!!! Dex: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 7. keks $1d11 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 1 Die with 11 Sides. Result: 9. Total: 9. $init 1d10 RockGolem: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 6. $init 1d10 $init 2d8 ArmoredStalfos: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 9. Sephiroth: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 4 and 7. $init 1d10 Firerobe: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 9. oh god Vincent_Valentine, reroll, you used $1d11 (Sephiroth isn't participating in the fight) (I know, lol) Quickstep Increase your initiative roll by $0d1. right and you did literally $1d11 not $init 1d11, lol derpy me $init 1d11 Vincent_Valentine: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 7. $init s The Battle has started! Turn Order: Firerobe (9), ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Red_Enrics (3) and Kirran (1). * Kirran discovers the face mask does nothing. http://prntscr.com/1lw2pe -=FIELD EFFECT - Attacking by melee and defending dice are reduced by 2. * Red_Enrics scrubs all the floors in hyrule ...... brb, getting a tower and fixing a spill (Must be a vertical spill...) ... must be one huge-ass spill to require a tower for it all.. not really kay back its his dark tower the spill motivated him to finally finish it * Firerobe pulls a jerk move and immediately casts Shockwave, hitting Vincent_Valentine, Dex, Kirran, and Red_Enrics! (Roll Wisdom) Reduced, huh? Yep, we're gonna die (Question, anyone have water or nature affinity?) $14d10 Dex: You rolled 14 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 5, 9, 2, 7, 5, 1, 8, 2, 9, 3, 1, 4 and 4. Total: 69. Successes: 7. $18d10 Firerobe: You rolled 18 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 9, 6, 4, 4, 9, 7, 5, 8, 3, 5, 8, 2, 2, 5, 9, 7 and 2. Total: 105. Successes: 13. $14d10 Kirran: You rolled 14 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 5, 1, 10, 2, 8, 4, 9, 3, 6, 8, 3, 5, 4 and 8. Total: 76. Successes: 9. * Vincent_Valentine just dies. im currently shadow who knows, you might live $4d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 4 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 9, 3 and 6. Total: 24. Successes: 3. im seriously thinking going for arcane though (Do I put $10d10, or $12d10?) ... actually defending dice reduced by 2. $2d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 2 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4 and 4. Total: 8. Successes: 0. oh, you don't have armor... well then.... oh shit $10d10 k, still 3.. Red_Enrics: You rolled 10 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 5, 6, 6, 9, 2, 5, 7, 6 and 4. Total: 56. Successes: 8. i need to rerollthen $12d10 Dex: You rolled 12 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 1, 2, 3, 6, 1, 10, 9, 7, 8, 9 and 6. Total: 64. Successes: 8. * Vincent_Valentine just curls up in a corner somewhere, smelly and fried. (Who knows, a kick line might revive you) Umm, shit, How much damage did I take? 13 - 7 = 6/2 = 3 - armor = damage taken (for Dex) actually wait i have fire 1. so 3? 13 - 9 = 4/2 = 2 - armor = damage taken for Kirran well if you have armor, it'll reduce it more than that No damge for me. armor is -2 so 1 damage for me My armor reduces damage by 3 13 - 3 = 10/2 = 5 - armor = damage taken for Vincent_Valentine 13 - 8 = 5/2 = 2.5 rounded = 3 - armor = damage taken for Red_Enrics 0! YAY! $recall 8h, 4m $endturn Firerobe has ended their turn. ArmoredStalfos: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Firerobe (9), ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Red_Enrics (3) and Kirran (1). 12H 5M * Fireblast124 is now known as Fireblast 5h, 3m | Shielded Shield 1h $init j Fireblast: You have entered the fray! * ArmoredStalfos covers Firerobe. 13h | 6h armor $endturn ArmoredStalfos has ended their turn. Vincent_Valentine: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Firerobe (9), ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Red_Enrics (3), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). * DM pokes the corpse of Vincent_Valentine. It is not amused. * Vincent_Valentine hurls a spiked boomerang at Firerobe, but hits ArmoredStalfos instead due to cover! (Roll Wisdom) oh, you're alive, nvm * DM face-palms. ... (power) * Vincent_Valentine face-palms lol $19d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 9, 5, 3, 7, 8, 6, 3, 7, 9, 8, 2, 3, 8, 2, 5, 8, 5 and 4. Total: 108. Successes: 13. $14d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 14 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 3, 7, 6, 6, 3, 1, 10, 10, 10, 2, 5, 9 and 1. Total: 76. Successes: 11. * ArmoredStalfos is hit! * ArmoredStalfos loses 2 hearts on his plating. actually, 0 damage on plating, 2 damage reduction on the plating itself * Vincent_Valentine 's boomerang bounces off ArmoredStalfos's armor and redirects itself to Firerobe's face! (Roll Power!) $15d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 15 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 5, 9, 9, 6, 5, 7, 7, 1, 1, 1, 1, 5, 6 and 1. Total: 74. Successes: 11. 13h | 6h armor EEP $6d10 Firerobe: You rolled 6 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 8, 3, 8, 2 and 2. Total: 26. Successes: 2. * Firerobe is thwacked upside the head and melts into the bottomless abyss of... crap. What a load of crap he was. 5h, 3m | Shielded Shield 1h $endturn Vincent_Valentine has ended their turn. Dex: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Firerobe (9), ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Red_Enrics (3), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). shurp $init r uhhhh Firerobe: The bot has been reset. Should have been acid Amazing. so firerobe is dead? yep oh OH Our turn order is gone. woops uhhh Turn Order: Firerobe (9), ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Red_Enrics (3), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). ok manual turn order acquired, lemme fix that one Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Red_Enrics (3), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). It shouldn't have hit Vincent with magic. Especially after last battle. last battle? wha? Dex daringly does daze darts at the dumb Armored Stalfos (courage) ... everyone should be maxed prior to the start of this session Vincent is scary when he's angry. This is great, the world is tearing apart from that Firerobe derping up the command $19d10 Dex: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 5, 9, 9, 9, 1, 5, 5, 8, 5, 2, 5, 7, 3, 7, 9, 3, 8 and 8. Total: 115. Successes: 15. $18d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 18 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 1, 1, 4, 10, 6, 3, 3, 2, 5, 2, 10, 5, 9, 4, 3, 10 and 8. Total: 95. Successes: 12. wuut wuut also * Kirran is commenting on Vincent's revenge. * ArmoredStalfos is twacked painfully by a daze dart... wait what. crit roll $1d5 Dex: You rolled 1 Die with 5 Sides. Result: 3. Total: 3. damn you also leech so i get a heart back actually ArmoredStalfos is Shadow Level 3 ... you lose 3 successes from attacking that, since Daze Darts uses Shadow ROLLOFF FRIG $19d10 Dex: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 1, 7, 5, 3, 9, 5, 3, 3, 4, 2, 8, 2, 10, 6, 1, 10, 9 and 8. Total: 105. Successes: 13. $18d10 well shit ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 18 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 2, 1, 8, 9, 7, 5, 8, 6, 4, 10, 7, 2, 1, 10, 2, 8 and 2. Total: 102. Successes: 14. god damn you all i shoulda looked at the affinities * ArmoredStalfos enjoys the power of affinity counters as he gracefully dodges through the manure infested land.................. what. 13h | 6h plating 12H 5M $endturn Dex: Want to end your turn? Get a battle started! yes? Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Red_Enrics (3), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). up next, new kick line * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in another channel on this network! Woah! «14,368») ......... gimme a second wut. BATTLE IN zuchat * Firerobe is now known as X___X But where are we supposed to chat in #zuchat oh ... #zuchat .... alright, I apologize ahead of time for this, I personally have nothing against Billy Ronald.... WHY YOU NO USE THIS TEXT ouch, my brain. Everyone must now type like they've got dyslexia. eqwkr waht fucking penis bagels Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Red_Enrics (3), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). lysdeixia isnt just tpeiying backwerds you no wrehes[ grmmr nazi wehn yu need him?? guise its moar about bad speeling and knot understhanding writtttten werdz si I want my grammar correcting friends back ;~; -=FIELD EFFECT - Dyslexia. If you do not type incorrectly, you will suffer a 3 dice penalty to all rolls. Also, as a result of this, Red_Enrics is forever drunk again. lul FCUdfsk fsck. weRHes tAht Wierod naemd Garmma Niaz incorrectly wose turn iz et Teh won tiem im nto durnk, I hvae ot ytpe liek dis *it isge redgenericvs turn- yuo scuk oto *It is eagr red enricscaeo turn, he musto af now attack gor somtehintef affore agrpegeriopgijregoreatg.* incorrectly i heop dis doesnawt last too match lunger crse u sepirot. *heavnea dosnt pheel like hetaven anyomero * Red_Enrics explodes waht si htia dsualxa $removeme Red_Enrics: Want to remove yourself from a battle? Get a battle started! Tdfurn Odrder: Armoreddfstalfos (9), Vifdsagncent_Valentfdaane (7), Dexrfre (7), Seghirotgerh (7), RockrehtrhtGolem (6), Sephirorgeah (4), Red_Enricgres (3), reg (1) and rgreaFireaegr\blast (0). kay just kdiding incorrectly waht are ew vene doin Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). *kireanf is upa next * Red_Enrics is now known as RedsGhost krin nik and arru end fries is et the rocc gollom (rll crge) $s1d10 $21d10 Kirran: You rolled 21 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 9, 9, 9, 10, 4, 9, 6, 5, 10, 9, 6, 3, 2, 6, 1, 6, 8, 2, 10 and 4. Total: 134. Successes: 18. $9d10 RockGolem: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 8, 6, 1, 3, 6, 8, 1 and 3. Total: 43. Successes: 5. 18 - 5 = 13/2 = 6.5 rounded = 7 damage 7h $endturn * RockGolem ends his egoeragtea tunr. Kirran: Want to end your turn? Get a battle started! I'm a dead ghost, getting rid of my dyslexia. ^_^ oh wiat nvm (lol) Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). *Fireblaltsdgt hath enterd a battlte thaaaaaaat aheaheheheeeeheheheheh is too hiiiiii fer.* * Sephiroth kicks Fireblast out the window. * Sephiroth has kicked Fireblast from #zurpg (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in an adjacent building's bathroom where someone was showering! Uh-oh. «14,371») * Fireblast (~ThatOneGu@CPE-65-31-190-95.wi.res.rr.com) has joined #zurpg * ChanServ gives voice to Fireblast *You all land in a very cramped shower, where a naked girl is showering. Frankly, you should all be stabbing each other naturally with all of the weapons you're carrying, there shouldn't even be enough room for you all here.* * Fireblast gets stabbed by her own sword Ohhhhh I'm going to do some "stabbing" alright... -=FIELD EFFECT - You have all inadvertently- SEXUAL INNUENDO ....... So that's what they look like naked... I mean... uh, how did we get here...? >_> * Sephiroth sets mode +s #zurpg Rated R. -=FIELD EFFECT - You have all inadvertently killed a naked girl simply by transporting into a space too small to possibly fit all of you. The blood causes Sephiroth to kick me again. lol * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in the fountain! «14,372») ... wow *Everyone is restored to maximum Hearts and Magic!* *Dead people stay dead.* * Fireblast reads a random comic book out of nowhere "naked girl"...DM, this isn't BoaB 14h Alive people stay alive. 10h, 3m | Shielded Shield 1h -=FIELD EFFECT - People die if they are killed. Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). * Sephiroth has changed the topic to: Affinity reroll, see this topic for more information - http://zurpg.sephiroth.ws/showthread.php?tid=234 | [18+] ONLY. -=KIRRAN EFFECT - He has a nice, naked leaf-covered lady next to him. He gets lots of love when it's not his turn and recovers 1 heart and magic every turn that he's not targeted. Woo! YARGLE :derp: * RedsGhost is now known as Red_Enrics * Red_Enrics rejoins the frey I wonder what my effect it *is * ArmoredStalfos ingeniously targets Kirran with his Skeletal Blade! (Roll Courage) $20d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 2, 5, 8, 2, 10, 4, 9, 3, 8, 7, 8, 6, 3, 7, 6, 8, 10, 6 and 9. Total: 130. Successes: 17. $22d10 Kirran: You rolled 22 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 7, 8, 4, 2, 4, 6, 8, 4, 7, 10, 8, 2, 4, 4, 8, 8, 7, 7, 10, 2 and 10. Total: 131. Successes: 16. Well fine. ;~; lol * Red_Enrics is now known as RedsGhsot * RedsGhsot is now known as RedsGhost That's the power of love. fuck it * RedsGhost is now known as Nolyghots * ArmoredStalfos bounces off of Kirran's armor (and the power of love), but he's now able to control Kirran's attack target. 13h | 6h plating $endturn ArmoredStalfos: Want to end your turn? Get a battle started! Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). *Vincent time!* 14h *Ding* How love works: Fuck it lol lol Nolyghots, no, get out, you are a poe Life is like a woman: Fuck it o_O O_o so is death -_- NECROPHILLIA wooooaaaaaaah there woah man 0_0 * Fireblast slaps in a Rated D for Drugs Nintendo, now your playing with incest These are the joke folks. (So now it's rated DM?) *DEX EFFECT - He's a necrophiliac and can make love with a corpse, thereby restoring hearts and magic equal to half of the corpse's respective hearts/magic. The corpse is then unusable.* * Vincent_Valentine grabs his Axe of Jealousy and charges at the RockGolem. (Roll Courage!) $23d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 23 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 1, 3, 7, 5, 5, 1, 1, 9, 8, 9, 3, 4, 2, 1, 5, 6, 10, 9, 6, 4, 10 and 5. Total: 116. Successes: 15. $9d10 RockGolem: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 9, 7, 10, 7, 7, 7, 1 and 7. Total: 59. Successes: 8. * Dex ...'s * Nolyghots joins the frey in place of Red_Enrics, because he's a lazy fuck * Dex eyes Nolyghots. 15 - 8 = 7 - 2 = 5/2 = 2.5 rounded = 3 damage Eek! 10h, 3m | Shielded Shield 1h * Vincent_Valentine ends turn. +1 bleed damage too * Nolyghots hides behind Kirran. 10h | Bleeding x1 Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). * Kirran is feeling the love. Oh god damn it! * Nolyghots hides behind sephiroth Sword of the Jagged Edge to the Rock Golem's ghoulies. $19d10 Dex: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 5, 7, 5, 6, 4, 5, 10, 9, 5, 2, 9, 10, 5, 2, 2, 5, 6 and 1. Total: 105. Successes: 16. * Kirran shoots at the DM out of turn. $9d10 RockGolem: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 7, 6, 8, 1, 4, 8, 8 and 5. Total: 56. Successes: 7. 16 - 7 = 9/2 = 4.5 rounded = 5/2 = 2.5 roudned = 3 damage 7h | Bleeding x2 ALSO BLEEDING also forgot $1d5 Dex: You rolled 1 Die with 5 Sides. Result: 5. Total: 5. CRIT WOOOO OH WOW RIGHT IN THE ROCKS 9 * 1.5 = 13.5 rounded = 14 14/2 = 7/2 = 3.5 rounded = 4 damage..... nice multiplier bro 6h | Bleeding x2 13H 5M ENDTURN DESU Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in the middle of a Civil War! «14,373») Wait, it a RockGolem is bleeding, then does it bleed out rocks? gravel ROCKS! >:D or sand Or those * Nolyghots throws a rock at Dex and hides I have no idea * Dex catches the rock and throws it at the Rock Golem. *Congratulations, you're in 1862 in America in the middle of a bloody crossfire! At the start of your turn, roll $1d2. If it's a 1, you're hit and you take 3 damage from a bullet (ignores damage reduction). If it's a 2, the poor man with a gun has a misfire and spontaneously explodes.* http://youtu.be/EQG3I5efwWo?t=48s $1d2 RockGolem: You flipped 1 coin. Values: Heads (1). Results: 1 Head (1) - 0 Tails (2). * RockGolem experiences rocky pain as a bullet strikes him right in the... rocksack. ....... AMERICA INCEST 3h | Bleeding x2 BAD RACIAL RELATIONS * RockGolem finally stomps the ground, sending a shockwave at everyone! (Roll Power) DEX $23d10 I AM YOUR SISTER RockGolem: You rolled 23 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 2, 4, 1, 10, 3, 9, 8, 8, 5, 4, 5, 8, 3, 2, 5, 6, 6, 6, 1, 10, 2 and 5. Total: 123. Successes: 17. WHAT $11d10 Kirran: You rolled 11 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 2, 4, 7, 3, 3, 3, 2, 1, 10 and 1. Total: 37. Successes: 3. You're not even a lizalfos Wow.... $21d10 Sephiroth: You rolled 21 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 7, 6, 6, 5, 1, 5, 8, 7, 3, 1, 7, 4, 4, 6, 5, 4, 6, 3, 7 and 7. Total: 105. Successes: 13. $13d10 Dex: You rolled 13 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 5, 10, 1, 1, 5, 8, 3, 7, 3, 9, 8 and 3. Total: 64. Successes: 8. * DM fowards Sephiroth's roll to Vincent. ... err $16d10 * Kirran throws a reroll to himself and prays ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 16 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 9, 4, 6, 2, 8, 5, 2, 8, 10, 7, 10, 8, 7, 2 and 7. Total: 104. Successes: 14. $21d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 21 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 2, 7, 7, 6, 8, 10, 6, 3, 7, 8, 4, 8, 9, 2, 8, 7, 4, 1, 6 and 4. Total: 124. Successes: 15. $11d10 Kirran: You rolled 11 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 5, 8, 4, 9, 2, 7, 2, 2, 4 and 6. Total: 52. Successes: 5. Eh, was worth a shot. $9d10 RockGolem: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 1, 3, 8, 8, 1, 3, 10 and 3. Total: 43. Successes: 5. 17 - 5 = 12/2 = 6 - 2 + 5 - 2 = 7 damage to Kirran OKAY THEN FINE DEX I AM YOUR COUSIN (it's technically a double hit, so armor is applied twice) 3h, 5m Still not a lizalfos. COUSINS DON'T HAVE TO BE THE SAME RACE! >:D * Kirran does have vulnerable spots. That hurt! Then again 17 - 15 = 2/2 = 1 + 5 = 6 damage to Vincent_Valentine In a way everybody's cousins to eachother Well considering lizalfos arent able to sex up non lizalfos thennnn in this case it means they do. theoretically Incest is everywhere 4h, 3m | Shielded Shield Active. er, I forgot to update my stats. 4h, 6m derp 17 - 14 = 3/2 = 1.5 rounded = 2 - 2 + 5 - 2 = 3 damage to ArmoredStalfos 17 - 8 = 9/2 = 4.5 rounded = 5 - 2 + 5 - 2 = 6 damage to Dex 13h | 3h plating *Two great balls of fire now explode... $1d15 DM: You rolled 1 Die with 15 Sides. Result: 9. Total: 9. *They cause fiery explosions, hitting everyone. (Roll Wisdom) $9d10 DM: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 9, 7, 2, 2, 2, 10, 9 and 7. Total: 57. Successes: 7. $16d10 Kirran: You rolled 16 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 5, 10, 6, 2, 7, 10, 4, 4, 5, 3, 7, 7, 4, 2, 3 and 8. Total: 87. Successes: 11. $14d10 Dex: You rolled 14 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 7, 8, 8, 2, 1, 8, 8, 8, 4, 9, 7, 7 and 8. Total: 94. Successes: 11. (If you get hit, you take 2 burn damage) $7d10 RockGolem: You rolled 7 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 9, 4, 9, 5, 9 and 2. Total: 39. Successes: 4. $9d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 1, 7, 7, 7, 7, 8, 1 and 5. Total: 49. Successes: 7. * RockGolem drops down to 1h. ROLLOFF on Vincent $9d10 DM: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 6, 7, 9, 7, 8, 8, 10 and 8. Total: 66. Successes: 9. $9d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 4, 9, 10, 9, 7, 8, 9 and 9. Total: 67. Successes: 8. *Vincent takes 2 burn damage. 2h, 3m | Shielded Shield Active. 1h | Bleeding rocks x2 $7d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 7 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 2, 9, 6, 10, 1 and 9. Total: 41. Successes: 5. 7H 5M * ArmoredStalfos takes some burn damage too. 11h | 3h plating 4h, 6m Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on the net of a tennis match! Uhoh, this could get ugly. «14,374») *Sephiroth is playing tennis against Fireblast! And the rest of you are caught in the middle. Tennis match, GO!* Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). (Am I the only one picturing Pong?) * Fireblast gets hit by a tennis ball somewhere... That gotta hurt * Kirran nocks and arrow and takes aim at the Armored stalfos. He feels like someone is messing with his aim though (roll courage) * Fireblast is away: Skip my turns if I don't get back after like two minutes because Wii and stuffs $21d10 Kirran: You rolled 21 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 7, 1, 10, 4, 4, 9, 2, 9, 4, 4, 5, 6, 2, 9, 10, 4, 10, 8, 1 and 1. Total: 113. Successes: 13. *Kirran ends up shooting DM, because DM pulled a pun on love in private chat............ dear god, that made it sound SOOOO much worse.* * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in Fat Bastard's fat! I don't think you'll be coming out for a while. «14,375») Uh oh. * DM is stuck in purgatory. You're all fine still. $20d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 2, 8, 4, 3, 9, 7, 10, 7, 3, 9, 9, 6, 2, 7, 6, 4, 2, 4 and 8. Total: 120. Successes: 14. 18 - 14 = 4 - 2 = 2 damage 11h | 1h plating Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), Kirran (1) and Fireblast (0). * Darte (~KenoguLab@c-76-28-207-252.hsd1.wa.comcast.net) has joined #zurpg *Sephiroth launches a tennis ball, which hits Fireblast, who spontaneously explodes and incinerates the last of ArmoredStalfos' plating.* 11h !!! * Kirran gains some health from his lovely companion. * Kirran isn't saying how. *As the next round stats, RockGolem overloads from his Mega Man powers as he bleeds enough rocks to power Darte's entrance.* BLOW JOBS * RockGolem is now known as X_X * You've invited Darte to #zuchat (eraniss.tx.us.lunarnet.org) megaman X-X * ArmoredStalfos grabs his sword and charges Dex with it! (Roll Courage) $20d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 5, 8, 9, 9, 8, 5, 5, 2, 8, 10, 10, 8, 9, 3, 1, 10, 6, 3 and 8. Total: 134. Successes: 19. $18d10 Dex: You rolled 18 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 4, 2, 2, 6, 1, 7, 1, 10, 7, 7, 5, 2, 7, 9, 10, 3 and 2. Total: 89. Successes: 11. frig * ArmoredStalfos guts Dex in the frig... * Nolyghots has quit (Quit: I used explosion, I'm not mad or anything, this is just too reidiclous XD) 19 - 11 = 8 + 1 - 2 = 7 damage 1 heart left * ArmoredStalfos is now able to control Dex's attack target! ... not that it matters. (nice survival) * ArmoredStalfos ends turn. Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), and Kirran (1) 11h * Vincent_Valentine covers Kirran. * Vincent_Valentine ends turn. 2h, 3m | Shielded Shield Active. 8h, 6m * Fireblast gets blown up by doing nothing by Sephiroth's tennis ball... This is why we can't have nice things *Kirran's love is interrupted by Vincent_Valentine's ability to censor love.* * Kirran feels love, feels love, feels lofe. lofe? That was the censored one. -=KIRRAN EFFECT - You're a lofehead now, she left you. You feel depressed and have -3 dice on all rolls.* can i still bust out the phillia of necros? sure do i have to wait for my turn? it's your turn now sweet NECROPHILLIA IS OUT * Fireblast is back (gone 00:09:21) GO GO CANNIBALISIM * Fireblast is now known as Ghouly * Dex eats Ghouly or the rock golem *Dex, cause he ate the strnogest guy here.... is back to max hearts/magic.* whichever is allowed to be consummed nah, eat the stronger one Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), and Kirran (1) * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in a puddle of horse piss! «14,376») (lel) oh come on, we don't need two of the same type in the same night! From one end to the other. Not that it matters. So depressed... * Kirran listens to break up songs. actually.... Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), Sephiroth (4), and Kirran (1) rekick again anyways * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on a sawblade! OMG, it's turned on! «14,377») That gotta hurt *Everyone lands on some painful sawblades, taking $1d4 damage. This is reduced by armor, fyi. So everyone, roll $1d4.* $1d4 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 1 Die with 4 Sides. Result: 1. Total: 1. $1d4 Kirran: You rolled 1 Die with 4 Sides. Result: 3. Total: 3. $1d4 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 1 Die with 4 Sides. Result: 3. Total: 3. $1d4 Dex: You rolled 1 Die with 4 Sides. Result: 1. Total: 1. * ArmoredStalfos nicks a sawblade and loses a bone. * Vincent_Valentine is sawed right down the middle. no damage woo $removeme. 10h * Kirran is cutting himself with the sawblade. What's the point anyways? * Vincent_Valentine is now known as BlueShell 7h, 6m Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), RockGolem (6), Sephiroth (4), and Kirran (1) *Mr. Depression is ready to roll. Or possibly not.* * Kirran halfassedly draws his bow and takes a shot at the skeleton. (roll courage, or whatever) $18d10 Kirran: You rolled 18 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 8, 2, 3, 1, 10, 10, 7, 1, 7, 9, 4, 9, 4, 5, 2, 5 and 10. Total: 101. Successes: 13. $20d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 5, 4, 9, 10, 8, 1, 4, 10, 9, 9, 5, 1, 5, 8, 4, 9, 2, 7 and 5. Total: 117. Successes: 15. Eh. * ArmoredStalfos dodges the depressed arrow with ease, as the arrow bounces off of Dex's armor. Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Vincent_Valentine (7), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), Sephiroth (4), and Kirran (1) (remove vincent, he died.) Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), Sephiroth (4), and Kirran (1) * ArmoredStalfos laughs his bones off and is shot by a pun, ending his turn and doing 2 damage. 8h Lame Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), Sephiroth (4), and Kirran (1) ;_; * Kirran has Oingo Boingo pop up on Spotify. It helps a little, he thinks. * Sephiroth pokes Dex and points at an open window. oh is it me yep I summon my blue eyes white dragon? * BlueShell kicks Dex out the window. * BlueShell has kicked Dex from #zurpg (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in the middle of a western gunfight! «14,378») * Dex (~DoubleEx@47.54.26.134) has joined #zurpg failing that jagged edged sword to the armored stalfos -=BLUE-EYES WHITE DRAGON IS SUMMONED - The Kaiba effect now goes off.=- oh ok cool ATTACK HIS LIFE POINTS DIRECTLY -=KAIBA EFFECT - Three blue-eyes white dragons are summoned in one turn. Originally, this is impossible, but with how Yugioh currently is with its brokeness, this is actually now possible to pull off. Woo! seriously though. (Roll $15d10 three times, against Power, Courage, and Wisdom) $15d10 Dex: You rolled 15 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 1, 2, 9, 6, 8, 8, 3, 3, 5, 3, 1, 6, 4 and 7. Total: 76. Successes: 9. $15d10 Dex: You rolled 15 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 9, 3, 6, 1, 8, 2, 1, 5, 9, 6, 1, 5, 8 and 8. Total: 76. Successes: 9. $15d10 Dex: You rolled 15 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 9, 8, 6, 6, 8, 10, 4, 10, 8, 1, 3, 6, 7 and 6. Total: 98. Successes: 14. $16d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 16 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 9, 9, 2, 5, 2, 6, 4, 1, 6, 7, 6, 7, 10, 7 and 7. Total: 91. Successes: 12. $20d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 10, 7, 4, 6, 5, 2, 9, 9, 9, 6, 8, 2, 2, 10, 8, 9, 9, 6 and 10. Total: 132. Successes: 18. $7d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 7 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 9, 9, 3, 8, 9 and 10. Total: 58. Successes: 8. SCREW THE RULES I HAVE MONEY * ArmoredStalfos counterattacks the second Blue-Eyes White Dragon... respectively, Dex himself. * ArmoredStalfos tries to gut Dex with its sword! (Roll Courage) $20d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 1, 8, 4, 10, 7, 9, 3, 4, 1, 8, 9, 10, 10, 6, 8, 6, 3, 7 and 8. Total: 129. Successes: 17. $18d10 Dex: You rolled 18 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 5, 4, 4, 9, 1, 6, 6, 3, 4, 2, 8, 10, 8, 9, 6, 6, 2 and 6. Total: 99. Successes: 12. 17 - 12 = 5 + 1 - 2 = 4 damage * ArmoredStalfos recoils from the 3rd hit and drops down to 2h. 2h * ArmoredStalfos ends turns. Turn Order: ArmoredStalfos (9), Dex (7), Sephiroth (7), Sephiroth (4), and Kirran (1) errr.... yeah, turn... stuff (Dex, end turn? yes i do endturn $endturn Dex: Want to end your turn? Get a battle started! * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on Chuck Norris! =O «14,379») (YES) *The cosmos spontaneously explodes from Chuck Norris's awesomeness. Everyone remaining is sucked into a black hole... roll Courage to escape!* $25d10 DM: You rolled 25 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 5, 2, 4, 10, 4, 7, 9, 10, 9, 6, 9, 7, 5, 1, 4, 8, 5, 3, 4, 8, 3, 7, 8, 7 and 7. Total: 152. Successes: 19. $20d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 10, 1, 9, 1, 8, 10, 5, 10, 7, 7, 10, 1, 10, 8, 7, 7, 8, 1 and 3. Total: 133. Successes: 21. $18d10 Dex: You rolled 18 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 8, 9, 7, 2, 4, 9, 4, 9, 2, 2, 3, 10, 2, 3, 3, 5 and 1. Total: 92. Successes: 9. $22d10 Kirran: You rolled 22 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 5, 5, 9, 3, 7, 5, 7, 9, 5, 3, 1, 5, 3, 10, 9, 8, 9, 1, 3, 10 and 1. Total: 119. Successes: 16. * Kirran throws a reroll at the black hole. * DM makes a deal with Chuck Norris to allow this reroll. $25d10 DM: You rolled 25 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 2, 6, 2, 10, 7, 8, 1, 10, 3, 1, 4, 2, 5, 1, 2, 7, 4, 8, 1, 3, 9, 4, 10 and 6. Total: 118. Successes: 14. *Dex is sucked into the black hole and is kicked back out by a kick from Chuck Norris. Your necrophilia has been kicked to another dimension, and you're down to 1 heart.* shouldnt i be infused by dark matter or something * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in #potato. «14,380») ... well, everyone to #potato i forget how to join new channels $join #potato '/join #potato * Kefka has attempted to join the following: #potato. $google Navan potato $google: Tests show resistance to splitting and potato virus Yo. When tested against potato cyst nematode, resuslts showed it was resistant to Globodera rostochiensis ... http://varieties.potato.org.uk/display_description.php?variety_name=Navan * Ghouly is now known as GLaDOSthePotato $google Purple Majesty Potato $google: Pick a peck of perfectly purple potatoes. These ever-so-delicious potatoes are purple through and through—with wine-dark skins and succulent purple flesh. http://www.burpee.com/vegetables/potatoes/potato-purple-majesty-prod001568.html what they are a thing $google Latona potato :) -Kefka- $google: Flood control enabled. Please wait 14 seconds before trying again. dangit flood control images are much more effective in this circumstance $20d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 1, 2, 3, 7, 6, 6, 5, 4, 7, 2, 9, 2, 5, 5, 9, 1, 4, 2 and 4. Total: 86. Successes: 9. $26d10 Kirran: You rolled 26 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 1, 9, 7, 8, 9, 6, 2, 6, 7, 1, 6, 2, 10, 4, 7, 9, 4, 7, 9, 9, 3, 5, 8, 5 and 9. Total: 154. Successes: 19. $20d10 $20d10 Kirran: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 3, 2, 1, 3, 9, 1, 3, 1, 10, 10, 9, 2, 1, 6, 5, 3, 7, 7 and 8. Total: 93. Successes: 11. ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 3, 10, 6, 1, 1, 2, 1, 3, 9, 10, 10, 8, 6, 10, 2, 9, 10, 5 and 1. Total: 113. Successes: 17. -2 successes * ArmoredStalfos dodges by the skin of its teeth- OH WAIT, IT DOESN'T HAVE ANY! * ArmoredStalfos goes back to dancing and ignoring Kirran's biting skills. Is he doing the gay skeleton dance is it my turn? and am i still purple Dex, gather the corpses to dance next to you. It will give you power. Actually its time for PURPLE RAIN * GLaDOSthePotato is now known as Ghouly the movie * DM flips ArmoredStalfos and Dex's turns. PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE GO Dex, you're up Oh dear sweet lord. PURPLE RAAAAAAIN *ArmoredStalfos is no longer dancing. He is feeling grave... and loses 1 more heart from the pun.* 1h suffer the effects of prince's acting debut lol attack time? yes im still purple arent i yep I still don't know what it does well it was a movie staring prince and it was really really bad lol like 2 razzies bad TO WIKIPEDIA http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purple_Rain_%28film%29 * ArmoredStalfos loses his lifesaver ability from how bad it is. He's just straight 1 heart now. Nothing ryhmes with Dex currently. Hex Flex Rex endturn You're purple. Mex Nurple * ArmoredStalfos acquires a sombrero from the Mex. Purple Nurple * ArmoredStalfos swings at Dex with his sword! (Roll Courage) $20d10 ArmoredStalfos: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 1, 10, 7, 7, 5, 3, 7, 2, 4, 10, 8, 5, 5, 8, 2, 10, 7, 4 and 3. Total: 112. Successes: 15. $18d10 Dex: You rolled 18 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 4, 1, 5, 8, 3, 7, 3, 5, 5, 5, 4, 9, 5, 6, 8, 4 and 10. Total: 96. Successes: 12. Dex, You rolled 18 Dice with 10 Sides - Result: 5, 1, 5, 9, 6, 5, 9, 8, 3, 5, 3, 1, 10, 3, 3, 1, 4 and 4; Total: 85; Successes: 10. Whoa ... fascinating what? sooo 22? Dex purpled so hard he rolled twice $10d10 Sephiroth: You rolled 10 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 1, 6, 6, 5, 7, 8, 4, 2 and 7. Total: 56. Successes: 8. Sephiroth, You rolled 10 Dice with 10 Sides - Result: 6, 1, 9, 4, 5, 4, 5, 8, 7 and 5; Total: 54; Successes: 7. * ArmoredStalfos is caught in between Navi and Kefka and strikes himself in confusion, killing himself. ... not fixed $1d10 Ghouly, You rolled 1 Die with 10 Sides - Result: 6; Successes: 1. Ghouly: You rolled 1 Die with 10 Sides. Result: 1. Total: 1. Successes: 0. $1d100 * Ghouly vanishes Kirran: You rolled 1 Die with 100 Sides. Result: 80. Total: 80. Kirran, You rolled 1 Die with 100 Sides - Result: 62. * DM observes as Navi and Kefka do a high-five, only for Kefka's ambulance to smear Navi's blood across the already broken cosmos. did purple rain break the game $10d10 DM: You rolled 10 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 8, 1, 9, 4, 10, 5, 7, 1, 6 and 10. Total: 61. Successes: 9. * ArmoredStalfos is now known as X__X $10d10 Sephiroth: You rolled 10 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 1, 1, 7, 3, 6, 8, 10, 6 and 3. Total: 52. Successes: 7. (Someone haul Red Enrics back here so he can get his xp) Then it turned out Kefka was Navi all along. +40 EXP for Kirran, Dex, Vincent_Valentine, and Red_Enrics +$40d8 Rupees $40d8 Dex: You rolled 40 Dice with 8 Sides. Result: 6, 8, 3, 5, 2, 4, 8, 8, 6, 1, 8, 4, 4, 2, 5, 3, 5, 6, 7, 3, 7, 8, 7, 2, 2, 4, 5, 4, 8, 5, 5, 2, 8, 2, 2, 6, 3, 6, 3 and 5. Total: 192. $40d8 Sephiroth: You rolled 40 Dice with 8 Sides. Result: 1, 3, 3, 3, 2, 7, 6, 7, 1, 5, 3, 8, 5, 4, 6, 2, 6, 8, 1, 2, 7, 6, 5, 4, 1, 5, 4, 5, 6, 7, 5, 1, 5, 3, 7, 8, 8, 2, 6 and 2. Total: 180. $40d8 Kirran: You rolled 40 Dice with 8 Sides. Result: 4, 6, 4, 5, 1, 5, 7, 6, 8, 6, 4, 2, 2, 6, 3, 4, 7, 7, 6, 5, 5, 7, 7, 2, 5, 4, 3, 5, 5, 7, 8, 8, 4, 1, 6, 5, 4, 5, 7 and 8. Total: 204. $calc 1344+180 1344+180 = 1,524 $calc 68-45 68-45 = 23 * Goriya (~Sean@pool-173-57-191-192.dllstx.fios.verizon.net) has joined #zurpg * Goriya is now known as Red_Enrics * Ghouly is now known as Fireblast Fireblast told me to Red_Enrics, , +40 EXP and +$40d8 Rupees * DM pulls a full heal/revive on Vincent_Valentine, Red_Enrics, Dex, and Kirran. *ding * BlueShell is now known as Vincent_Valentine * Vincent_Valentine levels up. * Vincent_Valentine acquires a new affinity level, Fire (Level 2) * DM requests another kick. You will get your kick when I am done updating my profile. :P kay * Red_Enrics acquires affinity Shadow 2 Just for kicks, eh Sephiroth? * Red_Enrics leveled up * Kirran is pondering affinities at the moment. * DM ruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuns. (If you just hit level 10, you get a new affinity level) $40d8 Red_Enrics: You rolled 40 Dice with 8 Sides. Result: 6, 1, 5, 1, 6, 4, 6, 4, 5, 3, 7, 3, 1, 8, 6, 6, 8, 3, 7, 1, 8, 5, 6, 1, 3, 1, 6, 3, 6, 1, 6, 7, 6, 2, 8, 5, 4, 7, 7 and 1. Total: 184. * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on Yoshi's tongue! Whoa! «14,381») WOO ...... And everyone is thrown into Yoshi's belly Fascinating Potatoes that are now eggs. Oooookay, we already have enough questionable stuff happening, I vote new kick line, I don't even know how to respond to that one. We're our own breakfast. * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on a ship that's headed to Antartica! Better take your winter coat along with you! «14,382») sweet * DM spawns Enderman and a boss. aww balls im cold blooded * X_X is now known as Enderman Done upgrading IT IS ENDERFRIEND Wait... http://zurpg.sephiroth.ws/showthread.php?tid=236 - Grammar Nazi w/ Double Turn for boss * X__X is now known as GrammarNazi * X___X has quit (Quit: Leaving) *BOSS EFFECT - All Field Effects from now on stack. Infinitely.* Now no $init r when you mean $removeme. >_> ... (kay) $init 1d11 $init 2d8 Vincent_Valentine: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 9. Sephiroth: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 2 and 6. (Red_Enrics, full heal, by the way) $init 1d10 Dex: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 2. $init 1d11 Kirran: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 9. oh god damn it (I took no damage in the battle. XD) $init 1d10 Enderman: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 1. $init 2d9 Fail GrammarNazi: Your initiative roll has been entered. You rolled: 5 and 8. * Red_Enrics goes back to not existing * Red_Enrics has quit (Quit: BYEBYE) * DM throws initiative- nvm. ... well then $init s The Battle has started! Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Sephiroth (2), Dex (2) and Enderman (1). *GrammarNazi's passive is now in effect. Be careful with what you say! If you want to chat safely, use #zuchat.* Are we still in Antartica? * Vincent_Valentine grabs his boomerang and hurls it at the Enderman, taking care not to look directly at him. (Roll Power!) $23d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 23 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 5, 10, 9, 3, 1, 10, 10, 3, 3, 5, 1, 1, 4, 1, 8, 5, 1, 4, 5, 9, 7 and 10. Total: 116. Successes: 16. (You're not in Antartica yet... you're on the boat going there.) I'm on a boat?! -=KIRRAN EFFECT - I'M ON A BOAT is playing for him. Does he like it? Indeed he does. -2 successes to Vincent_Valentine's boomerang attack (ranged) $7d10 Enderman: You rolled 7 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 5, 2, 5, 4, 2, 3 and 7. Total: 28. Successes: 3. * Enderman did not live to see the light of abusing the terrain. $removeme Enderman has removed theirself from the battle. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2) and Sephiroth (2). * Enderman has quit (Quit: Leaving) *And this is what happens when the glass cannon goes first.* * Vincent_Valentine watches as his boomerang bounces off the Enderman's corpse and redirect itself at the GrammarNazi! (Roll Power!) $19d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 7, 7, 3, 5, 3, 6, 9, 7, 1, 9, 9, 4, 2, 1, 5, 6, 10 and 9. Total: 105. Successes: 13. $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 10, 4, 8, 8, 8, 8, 4, 2, 4, 4, 9, 9, 5, 2, 10 and 3. Total: 105. Successes: 12. -2 successes to Vincent_Valentine's boomerang redirect (ranged) Grammar Nazi, look behind you! There's a missing antecedent! (Where's this effect at?) (oh) (... wrong guy, lol) * GrammarNazi is nicked by a painfully spiked boomerang, taking 1 damage. * GrammarNazi has 16 hearts left. * GrammarNazi attempts to counterattack DM, but he's blocked by the power of the fourth wall. * Vincent_Valentine has 13 hearts and 3 magic left, with 6 hearts on his shield before it becomes active. $endturn Vincent_Valentine has ended their turn. Kirran: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2) and Sephiroth (2). * Kirran is on a boat! Look at the motherfucking boat! He nocks an arrow and fires at GrammerNazi (roll courage) $23d10 Kirran: You rolled 23 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 4, 7, 1, 4, 4, 3, 4, 3, 9, 4, 4, 10, 7, 9, 7, 3, 2, 6, 10, 8, 10 and 8. Total: 131. Successes: 14. *Kirran is missing a period to his attack line and will be counterattacked after this.* $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 6, 7, 2, 3, 4, 8, 10, 3, 9, 3, 4, 3, 2, 9, 1 and 2. Total: 82. Successes: 8. (Kirran also misspelled the GrammarNazi's name.) * GrammarNazi is struck by an arrow to the knee, losing another 6 hearts. * GrammarNazi has 10 hearts left. * GrammarNazi counterattacks Kirran with a Question Mark! (Roll $1d5) $21d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 21 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 7, 7, 7, 7, 1, 6, 1, 8, 7, 6, 2, 5, 2, 6, 10, 10, 4, 6, 7 and 5. Total: 115. Successes: 17. (Wait, I roll a d5?) Question Mark (Weapon) Requires Level 10 and Shadow (Level: 3) Question Mark can only be used by Grammar Nazis. Grammar Nazi illogically wields a deadly question mark that makes absolutely no sense. Hits one target. Roll your Wisdom dice +4 Target rolls $1d5 to determine what he rolls to defend.[list=1] Power dice Courage dice Wisdom dice (Roll $1d5 first, this then causes you to roll something else) Maximum Hearts dice Maximum Magic dice $1d5 Kirran: You rolled 1 Die with 5 Sides. Result: 5. Total: 5. (Roll Maximum Magic dice) +3 successes and -1 successes to GrammarNazi's roll (Well, crap...) $1d6 Kirran: You rolled 1 Die with 6 Sides. Result: 5. Total: 5. ($10d6, not $1d6, lol) Your roll would be $6d10. (ooohhh...) (plus any shield you're carrying) $8d10 Kirran: You rolled 8 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 4, 5, 3, 5, 10, 1 and 10. Total: 42. Successes: 6. 19 - 6 = 13 - 2 = 11 damage 1h $endturn Kirran has ended their turn. GrammarNazi: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2) and Sephiroth (2). *HE'S ON A BOAT!* $1d3 GrammarNazi: You rolled 1 Die with 3 Sides. Result: 1. Total: 1. * GrammarNazi goes to stab Vincent_Valentine with a Question Mark! (Roll $1d5) $21d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 21 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 8, 3, 7, 7, 1, 9, 1, 9, 6, 10, 1, 7, 5, 9, 4, 6, 4, 2, 8, 9 and 7. Total: 123. Successes: 15. $1d5 Sephiroth: You rolled 1 Die with 5 Sides. Result: 4. Total: 4. * GrammarNazi gains +3 successes on this attack. $13d10 Sephiroth: You rolled 13 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 10, 7, 7, 3, 5, 4, 5, 4, 5, 4, 9 and 2. Total: 74. Successes: 9. 18 - 9 = 9 damage (Good god, he's dropping everyone to 1 heart) Like a boss? (two for two.) -=BOSS EFFECT - GrammarNazi is listening to LIKE A BOSS. * Vincent_Valentine has 4 hearts and 3 magic left; his shield is also active as well. $endturn GrammarNazi has ended their turn. Sephiroth: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2) and Sephiroth (2). * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in the school's parking lot where the principal is waiting! Uh-oh! «14,383») $endturn Sephiroth has ended their turn. GrammarNazi: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2) and Sephiroth (2). *The principal is waiting in a school at Antarctica. Your boat will reach him at the start of the next round.* * GrammarNazi uses a commanding sentence to bash Dex's head in! (Roll Power) $19d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 9, 3, 3, 3, 1, 4, 2, 5, 2, 8, 8, 2, 6, 10, 1, 3, 8 and 3. Total: 83. Successes: 8. $14d10 Dex: You rolled 14 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 9, 10, 8, 2, 2, 7, 9, 9, 2, 9, 10, 7 and 3. Total: 89. Successes: 11. I'm lucky. * GrammarNazi misses Dex by Navi's command. 10h $endturn GrammarNazi has ended their turn. Dex: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2) and Sephiroth (2). I'm going to attack using my Jagged Edged Sword. Please roll your courage. $20d10 Dex: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 1, 2, 5, 7, 6, 3, 9, 8, 10, 3, 7, 6, 10, 7, 3, 1, 10, 5 and 9. Total: 113. Successes: 16. $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 3, 10, 7, 5, 8, 1, 3, 10, 8, 9, 4, 8, 4, 7, 5 and 4. Total: 103. Successes: 13. * GrammarNazi is not feeling very courageous today, it seems. 16 - 13 = 3/2 = 1.5 rounded = 2 damage + bleeding 8h | Bleeding x1 $endturn Dex has ended their turn. Sephiroth: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2) and Sephiroth (2). * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on Jason's chainsaw! BTW, IT'S TURNED ON! «14,384») Wait! $endturn Sephiroth has ended their turn. Vincent_Valentine: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2) and Sephiroth (2). I forgot to roll crit. $1d5 Dex: You rolled 1 Die with 5 Sides. Result: 1. Total: 1. Nevermind. And then we all died. *The principal of Antarctica's school turns out to be Jason with a chainsaw!* * WindStrike (WindStrike@24.246.163.12) has joined #zurpg * WindStrike is now known as Jason ... * Jason is now known as ChainsawJason $init j ChainsawJason: You have entered the fray! * Fireblast drinks a cup of milk while watching the fight from above. * DM places ChainsawJason's turn before Vincent_Valentine's turn. * ChainsawJason grabs his chainsaw and swings it at everyone! (Roll Courage or Power) $22d10 ChainsawJason: You rolled 22 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 9, 3, 10, 4, 8, 3, 8, 2, 8, 3, 3, 1, 5, 4, 4, 6, 3, 6, 2, 8 and 7. Total: 111. Successes: 11. $28d10 $24d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 28 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 5, 8, 5, 5, 8, 2, 6, 2, 3, 5, 7, 10, 2, 1, 2, 9, 5, 9, 2, 5, 8, 9, 4, 6, 9, 8 and 4. Total: 151. Successes: 19. Kirran: You rolled 24 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 10, 4, 7, 10, 8, 4, 8, 3, 2, 4, 9, 3, 1, 4, 3, 1, 9, 6, 3, 2, 7, 6 and 4. Total: 125. Successes: 13. $19d10 Dex: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 3, 10, 2, 2, 1, 3, 4, 4, 2, 10, 4, 2, 3, 4, 6, 9, 10 and 4. Total: 93. Successes: 10. $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 8, 3, 3, 8, 10, 6, 5, 2, 3, 4, 10, 1, 3, 5, 9 and 3. Total: 86. Successes: 10. *Dex and GrammarNazi are quite the unlucky ones. The chainsaw's damage is increased by 3 and ignores damage reduction. The armor is also torn for the remainder of the battle and no longer reduces damage.* *Dex and GrammarNazi both take 4 damage.* * GrammarNazi takes 1 damage from bleeding. 5h | Bleeding x1 * ChainsawJason ends his turn. $turns Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). * Vincent_Valentine grabs his jealous axe and swings at GrammarNazi! (Roll Courage!) $25d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 25 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 5, 2, 3, 5, 8, 2, 4, 7, 8, 1, 3, 6, 8, 5, 10, 2, 3, 6, 8, 1, 3, 4, 3, 7 and 2. Total: 116. Successes: 13. $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 1, 1, 3, 10, 5, 10, 10, 6, 3, 5, 9, 7, 9, 6, 5 and 4. Total: 96. Successes: 14. * GrammarNazi narrowly dodges Vincent_Valentine's swing of jealousy. * Vincent_Valentine misses, unfortunately. * Vincent_Valentine has 4 hearts and 3 magic left; his shield is also active as well. $endturn Vincent_Valentine has ended their turn. Kirran: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), GrammarNazi (8), Sephiroth (6), GrammarNazi (5), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). * Kirran nocks an arrow and fires at the GrammarNazi! (Roll courage. Period.) $23d10 Kirran: You rolled 23 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 8, 7, 3, 7, 5, 7, 10, 7, 7, 10, 1, 3, 9, 8, 2, 1, 7, 10, 9, 5, 5 and 5. Total: 143. Successes: 21. $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 1, 9, 6, 8, 4, 1, 4, 8, 9, 3, 3, 1, 7, 8, 4 and 2. Total: 79. Successes: 7. Revenge of the MLA style, nerd! * GrammarNazi loses the remainder of his life to a flurry of periods. He attempts to correct KEESE AND CO.'s grammar, but his lack of enlightenment is unsuccessful, and he goes down as a misprint in Webster's Dictionary for the rest of his life. $removeme GrammarNazi has removed theirself from the battle. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). * GrammarNazi has quit (Quit: Leaving) * ChainsawJason is still left, suckers. * ChainsawJason has completely unknown stats and abilities. Dammit, Sephiroth. (LOL) * Fireblast accidentally spills You should get a tower on that Fireblast. *No worries about grammar anymore, he's outta here.* * ChainsawJason speaks. Gentlemen, if you don't up your grades, I'll be sure to punish all of you! * ChainsawJason has his chainsaw roar. (Kirran, $endturn? Actually, I'm a straight A student. $endturn for great justice Kirran has ended their turn. Sephiroth: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in a Nazi Brigade! «14,386») ........................ Oh shit. * Fireblast is now known as GrammerNazi * WindStrike (WindStrike@24.246.163.12) has joined #zurpg * WindStrike is now known as GrammarNazi * GrammarNazi returns from the grave. $init j GrammarNazi: You have entered the fray! * GrammarNazi does not have double turn attached.... $turns Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2), ChainsawJason (0) and GrammarNazi (0). * WindStrike (WindStrike@24.246.163.12) has joined #zurpg $endturn Sephiroth has ended their turn. Dex: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2), ChainsawJason (0) and GrammarNazi (0). derp. * WindStrike is now known as ThypoBeaver $init j ThypoBeaver: You have entered the fray! Cherry blossoms fall; /Attack with Jagged Edged Sword. / Roll Courage Nazi. $20d10 Dex: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 8, 7, 2, 7, 8, 3, 8, 4, 2, 3, 8, 2, 9, 10, 9, 7, 6, 6 and 7. Total: 122. Successes: 15. $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 9, 1, 1, 6, 1, 2, 2, 3, 6, 1, 1, 7, 7, 10, 3 and 1. Total: 63. Successes: 7. * GrammarNazi goes back to being a bleeding nazi. *Nazi is not capitalized, you take 5 more damage!* $1d5 Dex: You rolled 1 Die with 5 Sides. Result: 1. Total: 1. 15 - 7 = 8/2 = 4 damage, + 5 damage = 9 damage 8h $endturn Dex has ended their turn. Sephiroth: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2), ChainsawJason (0), GrammarNazi (0) and ThypoBeaver (0). * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on a poker table as the pot! :O «14,387») $endturn Sephiroth has ended their turn. ChainsawJason: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2), ChainsawJason (0), GrammarNazi (0) and ThypoBeaver (0). Actually, it is.... http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100523195503AAe6kpP * GrammerNazi is now known as Firby * Kirran is now known as GrammarKirran -=POKER TIME - When you attack, tell Darte (the only neutral guy here) whether you're bluffing or not. If the enemy defends and you're bluffing, you recover hearts equal to the difference in successes, regardless of its successfulness. (English degree powers activate!) * GrammarNazi fires a flurry of typos at GrammarKirran! (Roll Courage) $24d10 GrammarKirran: You rolled 24 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 9, 1, 3, 6, 5, 6, 10, 4, 10, 7, 9, 5, 5, 9, 9, 8, 6, 9, 1, 3, 3, 4 and 9. Total: 145. Successes: 18. $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 2, 5, 3, 3, 2, 7, 1, 9, 7, 4, 1, 7, 8, 10, 2 and 1. Total: 76. Successes: 8. * DM pokes Darte with a stick. Is he bluffing or no? HE WASSSSSS Bluffin'. * GrammarNazi recovers 10 hearts, but he gets counterattacked by GrammarKirran! 17h | Bleeding x1 * Darte is now known as BluffBot (lol) * GrammarKirran nocks an arrow of correction and fires it at the Nazi. (Yes it's capitalized.)(Roll courage.) $23d10 GrammarKirran: You rolled 23 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 7, 8, 7, 10, 3, 2, 6, 8, 7, 2, 9, 3, 8, 5, 7, 4, 4, 8, 6, 6, 4 and 3. Total: 128. Successes: 15. $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 3, 7, 9, 1, 5, 4, 8, 4, 6, 4, 7, 4, 10, 6, 9 and 9. Total: 103. Successes: 12. * GrammarNazi drops down and does 3 push-ups in accordance to the arrow he took. 14h | Bleeding x1 -=POKER TIME - On the flipside, if you're bluffing and the target calls your bluff and is correct, you instead take damage equal to the difference in successes, regardless of successfulness or not.* $turns Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2), ChainsawJason (0), GrammarNazi (0) and ThypoBeaver (0). hmm, turn flips... weird Flippy! You did say 'on the flipside'. $1d5 ChainsawJason: You rolled 1 Die with 5 Sides. Result: 1. Total: 1. Touche, sir. Vincent_Valentine! I'm not satisfied with your grades, young man. You will now pay for your hubris! * ChainsawJason grades Vincent_Valentine! Roll all five of your stats. errr *three *Power, Courage, and Wisdom (Three sir?) (I add them up?) (separately) $23d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 23 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 5, 9, 6, 7, 1, 10, 7, 5, 7, 9, 5, 8, 5, 4, 9, 9, 2, 3, 4, 4, 9, 9 and 9. Total: 146. Successes: 18. $19d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 5, 4, 3, 6, 6, 2, 2, 7, 9, 5, 1, 8, 3, 5, 7, 7, 2, 7 and 3. Total: 92. Successes: 11. $4d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 4 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 1, 1 and 4. Total: 13. Successes: 1. I have not yet received an indication of Jason's bluffing status. Hmm... your Power is quite excellent, and you are quite the courageous one! However... here, at school, we do not grade strength. We grade intelligence! * GrammarKirran is now known as Kirran And yours, young man... deserves punishment! I decree upon you... a F! (Roll Wisdom again) $1d25 ChainsawJason: You rolled 1 Die with 25 Sides. Result: 2. Total: 2. $2d10 ChainsawJason: You rolled 2 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2 and 2. Total: 4. Successes: 0. lol * DM cries laughing. $9d10 Sephiroth: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 8, 3, 1, 10, 6, 5, 9, 3 and 10. Total: 55. Successes: 8. Terrible school you have here, mister. * Vincent_Valentine redirects that roll.. $9d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 9 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 7, 1, 8, 8, 9, 3, 5 and 4. Total: 47. Successes: 5. * ChainsawJason is now an F-rated principal and suffers a -7 dice penalty to all dice rolls. * ChainsawJason is also counterattacked by Vincent_Valentine's superior intelligence. wuty me nowaf astupid guuuuuuuys You suck, ChainsawJason. Hit it, Grammar Nazi! * GrammarNazi combos with Vincent_Valentine's counterattack, adding a flurry of typos. A -7 dice penalty, ... so essentially 7 additional dice? *7 dice penalty.* * DM throws double negatives at the fourth wall. It weakens in confusion. It is a die penalty with an argument of -7, which is a perfectly legitimate statement. At least there's no math Nazi. Penalty does not imply that it negates the parameter. * Vincent_Valentine counterattacks with a swing of jealousy! (Roll Courage!) *Sephiroth = math Nazi.* $23d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 23 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 7, 5, 10, 9, 2, 7, 2, 4, 1, 6, 3, 2, 6, 7, 8, 4, 6, 7, 5, 7, 8 and 6. Total: 131. Successes: 17. $21d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 21 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 4, 2, 3, 9, 9, 9, 3, 1, 2, 3, 1, 10, 2, 10, 1, 10, 10, 9, 1 and 10. Total: 115. Successes: 15. * Firby is now known as MathNazi $13d10 ChainsawJason: You rolled 13 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 8, 5, 3, 3, 7, 7, 8, 5, 2, 7, 4, 9 and 6. Total: 74. Successes: 9. * MathNazi is now known as Fireblast124 * ChainsawJason is sent to a rehabilitation center, where he will be nursed by a fleet of jealous typos, all lead by ThypoBeaver. 3h, ??m | In rehab $turns Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2), ChainsawJason (0), GrammarNazi (0) and ThypoBeaver (0). $endturn DM has ended ChainsawJason's turn. GrammarNazi: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2), ChainsawJason (0), GrammarNazi (0) and ThypoBeaver (0). $endturn DM has ended GrammarNazi's turn. ThypoBeaver: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2), ChainsawJason (0), GrammarNazi (0) and ThypoBeaver (0). * ThypoBeaver gives ChainsawJason TheRapist. * Fireblast124 slaps in another Rated M for Mature * ChainsawJason gets $200 and goes to jail due to a monopoly claim. 3h, ??m | In rehab | In jail | Surrounded by jealous typos $removeme ThypoBeaver has removed theirself from the battle. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2), GrammarNazi (0) and ChainsawJason (0). * ThypoBeaver has quit (Quit: Leaving) 13h | Bleeding x1 * Sephiroth grabs his axe and swings jealously at the GrammarNazi! (Roll Courage!) $25d10 Sephiroth: You rolled 25 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 3, 7, 3, 5, 10, 10, 9, 7, 9, 9, 8, 8, 8, 6, 4, 3, 3, 6, 7, 10, 10, 5, 6 and 2. Total: 164. Successes: 23. -=POKER TIME is still in order. * GrammarNazi goes to defend. $17d10 GrammarNazi: You rolled 17 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 1, 7, 7, 1, 3, 4, 9, 9, 8, 4, 1, 6, 10, 6, 2, 5 and 10. Total: 93. Successes: 12. * DM pokes BluffBot. Wow, it's like Vincent is a whole different person when he attacks. 23 - 12 = 11 + 2 bleeding damage = 13 damage ohsorreh he ain't bluffin' I peeked at his hand and it's all there I think they might be all black? and pointy? yeah those also there were six rectangle things * GrammarNazi raises 50, and... folds. With that, he folds his life down to a simple sentence: DM is a hacker. $remomveme * GrammarNazi is now known as X__X * ChainsawJason is being covered by typos, fyi. * Sephiroth reminds GrammarNazi about ThypoBeaver with his typos. * X__X is now known as JealousTypos * Sephiroth is now known as GrammarNazi $removeme GrammarNazi has removed theirself from the battle. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). * GrammarNazi is now known as Sephiroth derp $endturn Vincent_Valentine has ended their turn. Kirran: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). mesa healousge of my ownfs yposg * JealousTypos is coveareing ChainsawJason with ihts jealougesl typoges oaf selfete ainception. * Kirran reaches into his quiver and pulls out a Patriot arrow, takes aim, and fires at Chainsaw Jason. (roll courage) $23d10 Kirran: You rolled 23 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 8, 3, 10, 2, 9, 3, 10, 2, 8, 3, 2, 6, 1, 7, 7, 10, 7, 5, 6, 1, 2 and 3. Total: 124. Successes: 16. * JealousTypos is covieragin and gre rolls insteatd. $5d10 JealousTypos: You rolled 5 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 10, 3, 7, 5 and 6. Total: 31. Successes: 5. * JealousTypos diies ing ea the palce. $init j JealousTypos: You have entered the fray! $removeme JealousTypos has removed theirself from the battle. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). 3h, ?? | Still in jail, though $endturn Kirran has ended their turn. Sephiroth: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). * JealousTypos has quit (Quit: Leaving) * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on Kirby's dinner table, better hope Kirby isn't hungry «14,388») $endturn Sephiroth has ended their turn. Dex: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). Fireblast124, all yours there. Jagged Edged Sword in the Chainsaw Jason with the Roll Courage What $20d10 ------------------------------------ Dex: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 9, 6, 3, 2, 2, 4, 5, 8, 5, 3, 5, 8, 1, 1, 6, 10, 1, 8, 2 and 7. Total: 96. Successes: 12. ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ $13d10 ChainsawJason: You rolled 13 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 2, 1, 7, 2, 8, 9, 9, 6, 9, 9, 8, 5 and 10. Total: 85. Successes: 11. ------------------------------------ Quick someone jam the printer ------------------------------------ empty the toner ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------ dangit it he got the full thing out Sephiroth used Kirby! It... Wasn't very effective... * ChainsawJason is nicked by Dex's sword as a nearby Kirby is unamused. Kirby will do something at the start of the next round. o.o *The blade bounces off of his armor, but he gains another stack of bleeding.* 3h | Bleeding x1 (err, a stack of bleeding) 3h | Bleeding x1 | In jail ($endturn? * DM pokes Dex. $endturn woops Dex has ended their turn. Sephiroth: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on a businessman! Is that your dad? «14,389») ING AT Sun Aug 18 00:56:34 2013 NG AT Sun Aug 18 00:56:35 2013 * Now talking on #zurpg * Topic for #zurpg is: Affinity reroll, see this topic for more information - http://zurpg.sephiroth.ws/showthread.php?tid=234 | [18+] ONLY. * Topic for #zurpg set by Sephiroth at Sat Aug 17 22:39:44 2013 * ChanServ sets mode +a #zurpg DM * ChanServ gives channel operator status to DM $endturn Sephiroth has ended their turn. ChainsawJason: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). -=GO TO THE CORNER - Your dad decrees that you go and sit in the corner of your room. You feel depressed, and Sephiroth kicks DM again to maintain his business. * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on my foot! Here comes another kick out the window! «14,390») Lol seriously http://tinyurl.com/62wvsc2 There's dad http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1J4FXUMOw8k *Everyone takes 1 neutral damage, and DM is kicked by Sephiroth out the window... again.* Dad's home (Thank you for linking that) 2h 2h | Bleeding x1 * Vincent_Valentine has 3 hearts and 3 magic left; his shield is also active as well. * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on a hill! «14,391») ING AT Sun Aug 18 00:58:56 2013 NG AT Sun Aug 18 00:58:56 2013 * Now talking on #zurpg * Topic for #zurpg is: Affinity reroll, see this topic for more information - http://zurpg.sephiroth.ws/showthread.php?tid=234 | [18+] ONLY. * Topic for #zurpg set by Sephiroth at Sat Aug 17 22:39:44 2013 * ChanServ sets mode +a #zurpg DM * ChanServ gives channel operator status to DM KING OF THE HILL I have the high ground. -=KIRRAN EFFECT - If someone attempts to jump over him, he will automatically slice the target's limbs off. I have the low ground. -=FIREBLAST124 EFFECT - If this somehow hasn't ended by the end of the next round, Fireblast124 wins by default. -=VINCENT_VALENTINE EFFECT - The low ground keeps you hidden. Defending dice increased by 3. -=DEX EFFECT - You Hillbilly you. Speak like a hillbilly. Y'all don't mind me none okay. $turns Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). -=CHAINSAWJASON EFFECT - Physics decrees that you're permanently sliding down the hill, whether you're going up or down. You no longer have the 7 dice penality, and you have +5 dice when attacking. $endturn DM has ended ChainsawJason's turn. Vincent_Valentine: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). Hey guys, has anyone seen where Kirby went? I'm a little worried. $2d4 DM: You rolled 2 Dice with 4 Sides. Result: 3 and 1. Total: 4. what did i just watch o.o Oh, he is over there eating all of the watermelons He will be back shortly *Kirby sucks Vincent_Valentine and Dex in! Roll Wisdom to dodge!* An internet classic. $15d10 Dex: You rolled 15 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 3, 9, 8, 7, 4, 10, 3, 6, 3, 6, 3, 3, 8 and 3. Total: 83. Successes: 9. * You are now known as Kirby $15d10 Kirby: You rolled 15 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 4, 7, 3, 1, 3, 8, 7, 8, 10, 8, 10, 4, 7 and 4. Total: 91. Successes: 11. * You are now known as DM $12d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 12 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 1, 4, 5, 1, 2, 10, 9, 2, 1, 1 and 9. Total: 48. Successes: 5. *Dex and Vincent_Valentine are sucked into Kirby. On their turns, they must roll Courage against the original success rate. If they're successful, they get out. If they're unsuccessful, Kirby sucks out their soul and instantly kills them.* (do defending dice count?) (this would be attacking dice technically) o.o it's like an endless madhouse in here Here, have some tea * Fireblast124 gives BluffBot some tea you missed it earlier when everyone had dyslexia (.. so I'd have to say whether or not I am bluffing?) thank you I think I shall WHY AM I DRINKING TEA (... bluffing against kirby... well, up to you whether you go for it or not) (roll when ready) $19d10 Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 4, 10, 9, 5, 10, 6, 3, 3, 4, 8, 8, 1, 3, 6, 9, 8, 5, 8 and 7. Total: 117. Successes: 15. *Kirby does not call the bluff, and goes for his 11 success defense.* *DID HE BLUFF?8 HEEEEEEEEEE'S GOT Jack of spades queen of spades king of spades ace of clubs -=BLUFFBOT EFFECT - Endless suspense. and a 5 of diamonds O.o BLUFFIN' According to my calculations, that would be too much to even handle *Not only is Vincent_Valentine healed by 4 hearts, but he escapes Kirby and causes Kirby to implode! .... woops.* * Vincent_Valentine has 7 hearts and 3 magic left; his shield is also active as well. *Dex is caught in the implosion, but he lives with 1 heart.* Screw the rules, I have pie ? why didnt i get to roll? meh, roll why has no-one made a vid of kirby imploding D: $19d10 Dex: You rolled 19 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 6, 9, 7, 2, 2, 3, 5, 6, 9, 2, 5, 3, 3, 2, 10, 6, 10, 9 and 6. Total: 105. Successes: 14. * Vincent_Valentine breaks into the Antartical Jail and swings jealously at ChainsawJason! (Roll Courage!) $25d10 BluffBot, look up real life kirby. Vincent_Valentine: You rolled 25 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 3, 5, 5, 8, 1, 6, 9, 3, 2, 5, 10, 3, 9, 2, 7, 8, 2, 4, 8, 7, 10, 6, 1, 5 and 8. Total: 137. Successes: 18. *Dex gets out perfectly fine.* i was waiting for vince to finish his turn $20d10 ChainsawJason: You rolled 20 Dice with 10 Sides. Result: 7, 4, 9, 1, 8, 6, 10, 4, 4, 7, 5, 4, 6, 10, 8, 9, 2, 7, 10 and 7. Total: 128. Successes: 17. 18 - 17 = 1 -2 = 0 damage, but 2 bleed damage.... http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m2nud5JVgP1qdjttfo1_500.png that's not coming up with anything obvious eitehr (wasn't he already bleeding?) O.O yeah one bleed, + another stack of bleeding And... Everyone who saw that picture so 2 bleed damage from the attack (kay) $endturn Vincent_Valentine has ended their turn. Kirran: It is your turn now. Turn Order: Vincent_Valentine (9), Kirran (9), Sephiroth (6), Dex (2), Sephiroth (2) and ChainsawJason (0). * ChainsawJason drops dead as his death is graded with confetti made of blood and failure. * ChainsawJason has quit (Quit: Leaving) * Kirran nocks a final arrow, takes careful aim for the window, and fires at chainsaw jason (roll courage) Or not. *Kirran's arrow finds itself in ChainsawJason's corpse. A+ shot!* *Alright, last kick line for the quest.* * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on Yoshi's tongue! Whoa! «14,392») Fascinating ................. Lmao, same as last time. We all landed in Yoshi's tongue *Everyone is eaten by Yoshi and spat out- screw it, just throw another one. And then into his stomache * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed up your butt! How the fuck is that possible? «14,393») ...... ................. ..................................... ................................ And our butts broke too Seriously, who hired the guy *The quest ends tragically as everyone experiences pain on a whole new level. You now choose whether you want to stay alive through this or not.* i want to liiiiive I do too. I, strangely, would also like to live. Survivors will be provided with molestation counciling Counciling for molestation, that is. I'm fairly certain the counciling will not involve molestation. First thing first: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpetCgI1zzI *Dex lives to find 45 Experience and a buttload of 250 rupees in his bottomless pit. Vincent_Valentine unfortunately finds the same in his. Kirran's sheikah senses tell him this is wrong, but his girly love returns as supports him in ways that we don't want to know about.* *You also find some random item drops... Grammar Nazi Boss + Grammar Nazi: $calc 23+45 23+45 = 68 $3d12 DM: You rolled 3 Dice with 12 Sides. Result: 12, 6 and 9. Total: 27. $calc 68-50 68-50 = 18 *A Bomb and a Shadow Sroll #2 drop... okay, just... kick me again so we don't end it in this horrible catastrophe, I'd rather not make puns like this unintentionally.* $calc 1524+250 1524+250 = 1,774 * Fireblast124 blows DM up instead * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed on another IRC Server! «14,394») screw that, I'm not going there right now Try it again Boss! * Sephiroth kicks DM out the window. * You have been kicked from #zurpg by Sephiroth (You have been kicked out the window and you landed in jail! «14,395») And... He is jailed Do not pass go I guess no more questing for today * DM ends up sitting in a pool of blood. do not collect 20o rupees. Stalfos: $1d12 DM: You rolled 1 Die with 12 Sides. Result: 5. Total: 5. Firerobe: $1d12 DM: You rolled 1 Die with 12 Sides. Result: 9. Total: 9. Rock Golem: $1d8 DM: You rolled 1 Die with 8 Sides. Result: 6. Total: 6. * Vincent_Valentine swipes the bomb. *Another bomb drops. * Vincent_Valentine swipes that bomb too. *And an Ender Pearl drops... see Enderman's Replaced Item Drop.* You got two bombs! What are you going to do with them? Blow someone up? That is what he does. * Fireblast124 slaps Kirran with a rainbow trout Here, take this useless fish I am off * Fireblast124 jumps out of the scene -=INSANITY END=- * Kirran is still on a boat, riding a dolphin, doing flips and shit. The dolphin eats the fish