[info]savic
2018-05-14 01:34 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Hey, I don’t know if you’re coming home tonight or when you’re coming home but I hope you had a good trip? If you’re not upset with me and you’ve just been quiet with me because you’re having a good time I’m happy for that, but if you are upset with me and just haven’t been talking to me just tell me why and if you even still want to go on this trip to Montana with me? Because right now it doesn’t feel that way.
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[info]hawl
2018-05-14 12:52 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
I’m home! Got in late. I really want to go home with you, Rem. I’ve been looking forward to it for months. I don’t know that it’s the smartest idea right now and i have no idea what this trip will look or feel like but I don’t want to not go just because things have felt off. I think I’d regret it and it would upset me even more if it didn’t happen. But... Do you still want me to go with you?
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[info]savic
2018-05-14 12:41 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Take care of yourself, Lo.
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[info]hawl
2018-05-14 12:53 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Wait, what?...
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[info]savic
2018-05-14 12:49 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
I’m moving out.
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[info]hawl
2018-05-14 12:53 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
What’s going on with you, Remi?
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[info]savic
2018-05-14 12:56 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Really? You don’t talk to me for almost a week but you’re talking to others while you’re gone and things are supposed to be fine between us? I can’t do this with you anymore, Logan. I asked you straight up if you were upset and you said no but then you don’t talk to me for days? What the hell?
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[info]hawl
2018-05-14 01:01 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
You broke my fucking heart, Remi. Every conversation we have turns into an argument. I don’t know how to do this anymore and I’m trying to maintain some sense of control and sanity here as I wade through the bullshit and the hurt, okay? So I’m sorry for not reaching out to you after you were blatantly evasive with me when you fucking knew how deeply I felt for you. Feelings or not, it’s a shitty way to treat a friend. What was I supposed to say to you? Good luck with your new chick and thanks for the memories? So I decided to act as if things are fine and adjust to whatever this new normal is because the other choice is just not having you in my life at all and I’m not sure which would be less miserable.
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[info]savic
2018-05-14 01:13 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Feelings or not all I asked for was some privacy which is what I would ask of any friend so I’m not sure how that’s shitty, it wasn’t a slight against you. The last thing I want to do is hurt you again and that just seems to keep happening. After that conversation about us I thought things were okay between us, I believed what you said, and I can’t apologize enough for hurting you. I don’t know how else to say it.
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[info]hawl
2018-05-14 01:21 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Jesus. It’s shitty because I’m fucking IN LOVE WITH YOU. And you told me you had feelings for me too, only to go on some vacation with a girl only days later. There was no precedent for privacy. You’ve never been secretive with me. So you left me with my thoughts to run wild about what was going on with you and her and that leads to the god awful spinning out. Just because YOU wanted to keep it to yourself, doesn’t make it any less hurtful to me. You should’ve just been honest in telling me you have feelings for someone else. And the fact that you don’t see that as a problem, and how you rarely own your part in hurting me, is not something I can overlook anymore. Stop apologizing if you don’t take the actions to back it up. And if you don’t feel like reinforcing your words with action, that’s fine too, but tell me so we can stop doing this.
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[info]savic
2018-05-14 01:55 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Logan, I told you that I care about you and that I didn't want to risk our friendship by taking that any further. I thought after what you said in that conversation about being okay with it, that we were good with where things were at and could actually just be friends.

Yes, part of not telling you about going on this trip with a new friend had to do with the fact that we had just had that conversation and I didn't want to make things worse. It was a spur of the moment thing with someone I was just getting to know. I've always tried to be conscious of not hurting you and doing what I think is right at the time, but that was wrong. I am sorry for hurting you like that.

I've been trying to talk to you and reach out to make things right and get back to some sort of normalcy with us. But the fact that you continuously ignore me when you're upset and meanwhile I'm thinking things are okay because you say the are is also not helping. Why not just tell me you need some space?

I don't want to keep fighting every other week. I miss my friend, I miss the way things were, and I just wanted to try and get back to something resembling that.
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[info]hawl
2018-05-14 02:40 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
That sounds like pure bullshit and excuses to me, but okay. If you don’t feel for me the way I feel for you, you should’ve led with that, instead of letting me think I mean more to you than I actually do. Moving forward, I’m giving to you what I get. So there’ll be no full disclosure. It baffles me that you consider being secretive and evasive to be steps towards mending our friendship. You know me, Remi. You knew how I’d react. You fucking said it yourself, that you knew I was upset. It felt like you were playing games and I deserve better than that. And I’ll find better than that in someone that respects me and my feelings. Sorry’s just a pretty word that makes absolutely nothing okay. If you throw a plate against the ground, watch it shatter, then apologize to it, does it suddenly become whole again?

Things arent going to be the same because I no longer trust you with my emotions the way I used to. We can be friends, but I need there to be walls up so that I can completely unfeel for you.
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[info]savic
2018-05-14 02:52 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Playing games with you? Seriously? Listen, I’ll do you better and be out of the house and out of your life by the end of the week.
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[info]hawl
2018-05-14 02:57 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Do what you want, Remi. I’m done fighting. I’ve got nothing left. But don’t act like this is about anyone other than yourself. You leaving is YOUR choice, independent of me or anything going on with us. If you need your own space to cater to whatever’s going on in your life, it’s on you.
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[info]savic
2018-05-14 03:02 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
Sure whatever you say.
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[info]savic
2018-05-19 02:25 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This  Select
You know, I almost reconsidered coming back this week to try and talk things through with you again, but after hearing that you talked to Oliver about shit you have no business talking to him about I no longer trust you with anything I say. We are no longer friends. You will keep my name out of your fucking mouth and mind your own goddamn business for once especially where I’m concerned. Have a nice life.