I hate how I have to use notepad... But there's no one else to talk to. Hell having someone to just listen would help. But all of my family is in CA or FL... I have no one to just talk to. That's what I want most.


You told me to just get all of the bad out of my head if I want to accomplish something... That's not just a switch that I can flip. That's exactly like me telling you when you were married to just stop feeling depressed and alone. It wasn't until I stepped in to help did things turn around. I was the help.
But now I have to deal with what I'm going through alone. I feel like you spit in my face with that comment.


I know that if I don't message you first... Then you'll never message me. Which is telling me that I'm only a nuisance.


I call sister too much, so don't wanna bug her. Brian is 5 hrs ahead and already asleep when I start work. There's legit no one to talk to :/


Worked out today...I was exhausted... But felt great.. But really showed how bad I've gotten

One of my teachers from school got in touch with me. Encouraged me to get back to working on art. So now I'm working on two pieces. One on my computer and another on my tablet. The tablet piece is half way done.


And another day of trying to talk but getting denied. I've lost 200 Sr because I can't focus, but then I fall into dread without being able to socialize with anyone. So I have to continue to lose Sr


It's Sunday.. as of now Wednesday isn't happening. Instead I'm spending another 300 on my computer, because that's the only thing that can bring my happiness


Whelp took a bit to straight up ask if u wanted to talk today. But no response yet.
I can tell you don't wanna talk. Guess that'll be it for our convo for today.


So no app means no bugging. Less of a chance of screwing up Wednesday if it's still happening.