Advertisement
Not a member of Pastebin yet?
Sign Up,
it unlocks many cool features!
- 1
- 00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:02,601
- Subtitles by explosiveskull
- akumenang.com
- 2
- 00:00:21,931 --> 00:00:25,434
- Loves me, Loves me not,
- by Ali Silver.
- 3
- 00:00:25,467 --> 00:00:28,838
- Once, I found a daisy
- and I played a simple game.
- 4
- 00:00:28,871 --> 00:00:31,841
- I picked off all the petals,
- it didn't look the same.
- 5
- 00:00:31,874 --> 00:00:33,910
- Loves me, loves me not.
- 6
- 00:00:33,943 --> 00:00:35,812
- Was it really worth the sound
- 7
- 00:00:35,845 --> 00:00:38,681
- to see all the little petals
- like teardrops on the ground?
- 8
- 00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:46,188
- Loves me not.
- 9
- 00:00:57,265 --> 00:00:59,201
- Let me
- get this door.
- 10
- 00:00:59,234 --> 00:01:03,673
- Keep going, keep going, keep going, okay.
- 11
- 00:01:04,974 --> 00:01:05,875
- Do you trust me?
- 12
- 00:01:06,809 --> 00:01:07,910
- Yeah.
- 13
- 00:01:07,944 --> 00:01:09,244
- Yeah?
- 14
- 00:01:09,277 --> 00:01:11,146
- Okay, open your eyes.
- 15
- 00:01:14,717 --> 00:01:17,185
- I must meet
- your decorator.
- 16
- 00:01:31,734 --> 00:01:33,703
- Uh...
- 17
- 00:01:33,736 --> 00:01:35,805
- Might stain
- your clothes, though.
- 18
- 00:01:35,838 --> 00:01:38,675
- Well, we can't
- have that, can we?
- 19
- 00:01:38,708 --> 00:01:39,609
- No.
- 20
- 00:02:34,329 --> 00:02:35,530
- Full moon tonight.
- 21
- 00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:37,432
- Is that okay?
- 22
- 00:02:38,366 --> 00:02:39,736
- Wouldn't miss it for the world.
- 23
- 00:02:39,769 --> 00:02:40,670
- Aw.
- 24
- 00:02:46,042 --> 00:02:48,678
- What's with the fake
- beard and the crutches?
- 25
- 00:02:48,711 --> 00:02:51,546
- Oh. Um...
- 26
- 00:02:51,581 --> 00:02:53,916
- a buddy of mine needed a lift
- to an audition the other day.
- 27
- 00:02:53,950 --> 00:02:57,352
- - Oh.
- - Left his stuff in my car in case he gets a call back.
- 28
- 00:02:57,385 --> 00:02:58,320
- Oh.
- 29
- 00:03:00,790 --> 00:03:02,324
- What is that on your windshield?
- 30
- 00:03:15,738 --> 00:03:18,373
- I have no idea
- how that got there.
- 31
- 00:03:19,809 --> 00:03:21,077
- Aw.
- 32
- 00:03:21,110 --> 00:03:22,277
- See you tonight?
- 33
- 00:03:36,692 --> 00:03:38,895
- Hi,
- you've reached Eva Silver.
- 34
- 00:03:38,928 --> 00:03:40,930
- Tip for the day:
- write the bad things
- 35
- 00:03:40,963 --> 00:03:42,665
- that happen to you in sand,
- 36
- 00:03:42,698 --> 00:03:44,734
- carve the good things
- that happen to you
- 37
- 00:03:44,767 --> 00:03:46,602
- on a slab of marble,
- 38
- 00:03:46,636 --> 00:03:49,571
- and leave a message at the beep.
- 39
- 00:03:50,606 --> 00:03:52,875
- Hi, Mom, it's me.
- 40
- 00:03:52,909 --> 00:03:55,477
- How are you?
- I was just calling to say hi,
- 41
- 00:03:55,510 --> 00:03:57,680
- but I also wanted to tell you
- that I spent another day
- 42
- 00:03:57,713 --> 00:03:59,749
- with that guy
- I was telling you about,
- 43
- 00:03:59,782 --> 00:04:01,951
- and I think this one
- is a keeper.
- 44
- 00:04:03,119 --> 00:04:04,020
- I love you.
- 45
- 00:04:07,556 --> 00:04:08,591
- Loves me.
- 46
- 00:04:10,860 --> 00:04:11,928
- Loves me not.
- 47
- 00:04:13,930 --> 00:04:15,397
- Loves me.
- 48
- 00:04:16,098 --> 00:04:17,566
- Loves me not.
- 49
- 00:04:19,401 --> 00:04:20,435
- Loves me.
- 50
- 00:04:22,004 --> 00:04:22,939
- Loves me not.
- 51
- 00:04:24,539 --> 00:04:25,540
- Loves me.
- 52
- 00:04:27,643 --> 00:04:28,811
- Loves me not.
- 53
- 00:04:29,812 --> 00:04:30,813
- Loves me.
- 54
- 00:04:32,648 --> 00:04:33,850
- Loves me not.
- 55
- 00:04:36,118 --> 00:04:37,620
- Loves me.
- 56
- 00:04:37,653 --> 00:04:38,654
- Loves me not.
- 57
- 00:04:39,755 --> 00:04:41,023
- Loves me.
- 58
- 00:04:41,958 --> 00:04:43,491
- Loves me not.
- 59
- 00:04:45,027 --> 00:04:46,596
- Give me the tennis bracelet.
- 60
- 00:04:48,064 --> 00:04:49,065
- Loves me.
- 61
- 00:04:51,801 --> 00:04:53,401
- Any one
- in particular?
- 62
- 00:04:55,004 --> 00:04:56,939
- All of them!
- Let's go, all of them!
- 63
- 00:04:58,007 --> 00:04:58,975
- Loves me not.
- 64
- 00:04:59,942 --> 00:05:01,077
- Come on, all of them!
- 65
- 00:05:01,110 --> 00:05:02,444
- Oh, shit, shit!
- 66
- 00:05:03,779 --> 00:05:04,747
- Loves me.
- 67
- 00:05:07,650 --> 00:05:08,550
- No. No, it's not...
- 68
- 00:05:13,823 --> 00:05:14,724
- Loves me not.
- 69
- 00:05:34,877 --> 00:05:35,878
- Loves me.
- 70
- 00:07:22,351 --> 00:07:25,021
- Your name was
- in his cell phone and photos
- 71
- 00:07:25,054 --> 00:07:27,790
- that led me to believe
- that you were his girlfriend.
- 72
- 00:07:27,823 --> 00:07:30,826
- So I'm going to have to ask you
- for whatever gifts he gave you
- 73
- 00:07:30,860 --> 00:07:33,662
- to match them against police
- reports of stolen items.
- 74
- 00:07:33,696 --> 00:07:35,898
- Don't worry, you're not
- going to get in any trouble.
- 75
- 00:07:35,931 --> 00:07:38,000
- Also, you want
- to check your credit cards,
- 76
- 00:07:38,034 --> 00:07:39,735
- because he had
- a rap sheet that included
- 77
- 00:07:39,769 --> 00:07:42,071
- fraud and identity theft.
- 78
- 00:07:42,104 --> 00:07:44,572
- I just wish life
- would behave itself.
- 79
- 00:07:44,607 --> 00:07:45,875
- And men.
- 80
- 00:07:45,908 --> 00:07:47,576
- I don't have a rap sheet.
- 81
- 00:07:48,844 --> 00:07:49,812
- Excuse me?
- 82
- 00:07:51,714 --> 00:07:53,749
- You're sweet,
- and you deserve better.
- 83
- 00:07:55,251 --> 00:07:57,753
- Have you ever thought
- about dating a police detective?
- 84
- 00:07:59,121 --> 00:08:01,057
- You're asking me this now?
- 85
- 00:08:01,090 --> 00:08:03,659
- I admit, it's
- bad timing, but if,
- 86
- 00:08:03,692 --> 00:08:05,094
- if I could have your number,
- 87
- 00:08:05,127 --> 00:08:07,663
- after a couple of weeks,
- maybe a cup of coffee?
- 88
- 00:08:07,696 --> 00:08:09,698
- How do you know
- I wasn't Bonnie to his Clyde?
- 89
- 00:08:09,732 --> 00:08:11,000
- It's what I do for a living.
- 90
- 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:16,205
- Well, you already have my number
- 91
- 00:08:16,238 --> 00:08:19,141
- on the cell phone,
- and the pictures.
- 92
- 00:08:20,176 --> 00:08:22,211
- I'll delete the ones
- you're thinking of.
- 93
- 00:08:23,879 --> 00:08:24,780
- Thanks.
- 94
- 00:08:26,115 --> 00:08:28,217
- Babe, I got your 911
- and came as fast
- 95
- 00:08:28,250 --> 00:08:30,886
- - as I could.
- - "Run, Forrest, Run Guy" is dead.
- 96
- 00:08:30,920 --> 00:08:34,790
- - What?
- - He got shot, 18 times, one shot missed.
- 97
- 00:08:34,824 --> 00:08:35,991
- Holy fuck.
- 98
- 00:08:36,025 --> 00:08:37,993
- I'm cursed.
- 99
- 00:08:38,027 --> 00:08:40,029
- - You're not cursed.
- - I ignore that little red flag voice
- 100
- 00:08:40,062 --> 00:08:41,864
- because when we met
- we were innocent kids.
- 101
- 00:08:41,897 --> 00:08:44,800
- It felt like nine-year-old
- Ali finally got a keeper.
- 102
- 00:08:44,834 --> 00:08:46,135
- Come on, Ali.
- 103
- 00:08:46,168 --> 00:08:47,870
- You find Brock
- on Facebook and what?
- 104
- 00:08:47,903 --> 00:08:50,239
- A month later you're going
- through brides magazines?
- 105
- 00:08:50,272 --> 00:08:53,008
- You were Phi Beta Kappa
- and all that bull crapper.
- 106
- 00:08:53,042 --> 00:08:54,977
- You should know how to navigate
- this parade of men.
- 107
- 00:08:55,010 --> 00:08:55,911
- Charade of men.
- 108
- 00:08:56,812 --> 00:08:58,914
- You will do better, I know it.
- 109
- 00:08:58,948 --> 00:09:00,249
- You're just
- saying that to be nice.
- 110
- 00:09:00,282 --> 00:09:02,251
- Does that
- sound like me?
- 111
- 00:09:02,284 --> 00:09:05,654
- Do you realize that there are
- days I wish I was in your shoes?
- 112
- 00:09:05,688 --> 00:09:06,889
- Mine?
- 113
- 00:09:06,922 --> 00:09:08,991
- Yes, even though
- you're a hot mess.
- 114
- 00:09:09,024 --> 00:09:11,293
- My picker has just broken.
- 115
- 00:09:11,327 --> 00:09:13,129
- You have freedom.
- 116
- 00:09:13,162 --> 00:09:14,830
- I suppose.
- 117
- 00:09:14,864 --> 00:09:16,232
- Thanks for not saying
- I told you so.
- 118
- 00:09:16,265 --> 00:09:18,667
- So you do remember?
- 119
- 00:09:18,701 --> 00:09:21,203
- After the first time you met him you
- said, "Run like he's a house on fire."
- 120
- 00:09:21,237 --> 00:09:22,705
- But he wasn't a house on fire,
- 121
- 00:09:22,738 --> 00:09:25,274
- he was more like
- a candy store on fire.
- 122
- 00:09:25,307 --> 00:09:27,877
- You know you should flee,
- but it just...
- 123
- 00:09:27,910 --> 00:09:29,044
- smells too good.
- 124
- 00:09:30,079 --> 00:09:31,847
- Sorry, bestie.
- 125
- 00:09:31,881 --> 00:09:33,082
- I love you, Veronica.
- 126
- 00:09:34,850 --> 00:09:38,888
- So, I guess "Run, Forrest,
- Run Guy" is "Dead Guy" now?
- 127
- 00:09:40,756 --> 00:09:41,657
- Too soon?
- 128
- 00:09:43,392 --> 00:09:45,361
- I'm sorry, come here.
- 129
- 00:09:46,262 --> 00:09:47,163
- You got it.
- 130
- 00:09:50,032 --> 00:09:51,734
- We were supposed
- to be surfing tonight.
- 131
- 00:10:35,244 --> 00:10:37,513
- I haven't discussed this before
- 132
- 00:10:37,546 --> 00:10:39,915
- because, if I start
- from the beginning,
- 133
- 00:10:39,949 --> 00:10:42,051
- it'll take freaking forever.
- 134
- 00:10:42,084 --> 00:10:44,220
- Remember, we're working
- on naming our feelings,
- 135
- 00:10:44,253 --> 00:10:45,521
- about our problem?
- 136
- 00:10:45,554 --> 00:10:47,923
- Like we've done before
- in single words.
- 137
- 00:10:50,826 --> 00:10:52,061
- Humiliated.
- 138
- 00:10:53,262 --> 00:10:54,196
- Unlovable.
- 139
- 00:10:56,031 --> 00:10:57,299
- Worthless.
- 140
- 00:10:57,333 --> 00:10:58,934
- Let's start with humiliated.
- 141
- 00:11:00,369 --> 00:11:01,370
- It involves Dylan.
- 142
- 00:11:02,338 --> 00:11:04,273
- Dylan from our group?
- 143
- 00:11:04,306 --> 00:11:05,374
- We used to go out...
- 144
- 00:11:07,142 --> 00:11:09,845
- but I wouldn't go
- all the way like the others.
- 145
- 00:11:09,878 --> 00:11:12,881
- I'd let him do
- everything else, but...
- 146
- 00:11:12,915 --> 00:11:15,217
- then he stopped
- hanging out with me and...
- 147
- 00:11:15,251 --> 00:11:16,986
- told me I was a cock tease.
- 148
- 00:11:18,387 --> 00:11:20,022
- Come to find out
- 149
- 00:11:20,055 --> 00:11:22,157
- he's actually been
- throwing shit on me
- 150
- 00:11:22,191 --> 00:11:23,926
- about certain private parts.
- 151
- 00:11:26,061 --> 00:11:28,130
- Do you want to know
- what he's been saying?
- 152
- 00:11:28,163 --> 00:11:29,798
- Only if you think
- it's important.
- 153
- 00:11:30,566 --> 00:11:31,533
- I want to say it.
- 154
- 00:11:34,303 --> 00:11:37,172
- He's been telling people
- that I have really long lips.
- 155
- 00:11:40,843 --> 00:11:41,844
- Oh.
- 156
- 00:11:42,945 --> 00:11:44,280
- They call me "Lily long lips."
- 157
- 00:11:45,514 --> 00:11:48,851
- I have no control
- over what it looks like.
- 158
- 00:11:48,884 --> 00:11:50,819
- Of course not.
- 159
- 00:11:50,853 --> 00:11:52,187
- And it's bull anyway.
- 160
- 00:11:52,221 --> 00:11:54,423
- We all come in different
- shapes and sizes.
- 161
- 00:11:54,456 --> 00:11:56,525
- Seriously, there is
- no right or wrong
- 162
- 00:11:56,558 --> 00:11:58,193
- when it comes to private parts.
- 163
- 00:12:00,129 --> 00:12:02,131
- I read about
- this operation online,
- 164
- 00:12:02,164 --> 00:12:03,365
- labiaplasty.
- 165
- 00:12:04,466 --> 00:12:07,503
- The important thing to think
- about is to avoid anyone
- 166
- 00:12:07,536 --> 00:12:09,438
- who would shame you
- over anything.
- 167
- 00:12:12,408 --> 00:12:15,844
- Do you want to know
- the really messed up thing?
- 168
- 00:12:16,646 --> 00:12:18,480
- The thing I want most
- to happen now.
- 169
- 00:12:19,481 --> 00:12:20,449
- What is that?
- 170
- 00:12:21,584 --> 00:12:22,985
- I want to fuck Dylan.
- 171
- 00:12:24,353 --> 00:12:25,421
- And I want him to love it.
- 172
- 00:12:28,490 --> 00:12:32,294
- Many of us will pick
- the worst ways to feel loved,
- 173
- 00:12:32,328 --> 00:12:34,163
- desired, worthy.
- 174
- 00:12:35,931 --> 00:12:37,566
- Now, I want you to read
- this out loud every day:
- 175
- 00:12:38,467 --> 00:12:39,835
- "I love and accept myself.
- 176
- 00:12:42,605 --> 00:12:44,006
- Where I am right now.
- 177
- 00:12:47,476 --> 00:12:48,477
- I am safe."
- 178
- 00:12:52,181 --> 00:12:53,949
- I want you to read it,
- 179
- 00:12:53,982 --> 00:12:55,250
- and practice believing it.
- 180
- 00:12:57,019 --> 00:12:58,220
- And I'll see you on Wednesday.
- 181
- 00:13:03,325 --> 00:13:07,429
- You know, I wish I could be
- just like you, Miss Silver.
- 182
- 00:13:08,530 --> 00:13:10,132
- You really have
- your act together.
- 183
- 00:13:10,165 --> 00:13:11,066
- Thank you.
- 184
- 00:13:16,405 --> 00:13:20,677
- Meet the denizens of the Sandpiper
- Apartment Complex in Malibu.
- 185
- 00:13:20,710 --> 00:13:24,980
- Trust fund babies, models,
- alcoholics, the lost people.
- 186
- 00:13:25,013 --> 00:13:29,251
- Everyone looks toned, tanned,
- and deceptively healthy.
- 187
- 00:13:29,284 --> 00:13:32,454
- But I loved him,
- he was so sweet.
- 188
- 00:13:33,455 --> 00:13:35,324
- Should have known
- he wasn't a bond trader,
- 189
- 00:13:35,357 --> 00:13:37,594
- he couldn't figure out
- the tip at a restaurant.
- 190
- 00:13:37,627 --> 00:13:40,329
- He figured out
- how to max out your Visa.
- 191
- 00:13:40,362 --> 00:13:42,531
- Fashion show!
- 192
- 00:13:42,564 --> 00:13:46,603
- Watch out when an Iranian
- and a Russian joined forces.
- 193
- 00:13:46,636 --> 00:13:50,372
- Everyone, I've had an epiphany.
- 194
- 00:13:50,406 --> 00:13:54,209
- From this day forward,
- I am done with all men.
- 195
- 00:13:54,243 --> 00:13:57,379
- - You need a chick?
- - I'd probably end up with a nightmare like you.
- 196
- 00:13:57,413 --> 00:13:58,347
- Right.
- 197
- 00:13:59,481 --> 00:14:01,618
- I love you too,
- my green-eyed angel.
- 198
- 00:14:01,651 --> 00:14:04,987
- I'm serious, abstinence
- from this day forward.
- 199
- 00:14:05,020 --> 00:14:06,221
- There's a Persian saying.
- 200
- 00:14:06,255 --> 00:14:09,258
- Of course there is.
- 201
- 00:14:09,291 --> 00:14:12,494
- You don't quit drinking water
- because a glass once broke.
- 202
- 00:14:12,528 --> 00:14:15,130
- You already know what
- I think: Mr. Nice Guy.
- 203
- 00:14:15,164 --> 00:14:16,565
- Ugh, too nice.
- 204
- 00:14:16,599 --> 00:14:18,233
- But I thought you said
- he was good in bed?
- 205
- 00:14:18,267 --> 00:14:19,636
- That was Stalker Guy number two,
- 206
- 00:14:19,669 --> 00:14:21,403
- not buying that horse again.
- 207
- 00:14:21,437 --> 00:14:25,007
- Nice Guy had sex with about
- as much improvisation
- 208
- 00:14:25,040 --> 00:14:28,243
- as the formula
- for the isosceles triangle.
- 209
- 00:14:28,277 --> 00:14:29,646
- Will Finnegan begin again?
- 210
- 00:14:29,679 --> 00:14:31,346
- I saw him in US Magazine,
- 211
- 00:14:31,380 --> 00:14:34,016
- roundhouse kicking
- his own father in the nuts.
- 212
- 00:14:34,049 --> 00:14:36,118
- But I saw on TMZ
- that he was clean and sober.
- 213
- 00:14:36,151 --> 00:14:39,087
- I doubt that, all those years
- in and out of rehab.
- 214
- 00:14:39,121 --> 00:14:41,323
- Plus, you know how
- shitty he treated me.
- 215
- 00:14:41,356 --> 00:14:42,257
- Who is Finnegan?
- 216
- 00:14:42,291 --> 00:14:44,159
- He devirginized Ali.
- 217
- 00:14:44,193 --> 00:14:47,095
- You think that would be
- vodka under the bridge by now.
- 218
- 00:14:47,129 --> 00:14:49,699
- Some rotten experiences
- you carry with you forever.
- 219
- 00:14:49,732 --> 00:14:50,999
- Life is not fair.
- 220
- 00:14:51,033 --> 00:14:52,635
- Women can fake orgasms,
- 221
- 00:14:52,669 --> 00:14:55,304
- but men can fake love.
- 222
- 00:14:55,337 --> 00:14:56,773
- - Poor me.
- - Poor you.
- 223
- 00:14:56,806 --> 00:14:58,373
- Pour her a drink.
- 224
- 00:14:58,407 --> 00:14:59,341
- Mm.
- 225
- 00:15:03,345 --> 00:15:05,314
- There goes another potato!
- 226
- 00:15:12,789 --> 00:15:14,022
- Oh, shit.
- 227
- 00:15:14,056 --> 00:15:16,225
- I'm not a narc, losers.
- 228
- 00:15:16,258 --> 00:15:18,460
- We just assumed you
- didn't want to participate.
- 229
- 00:15:18,494 --> 00:15:20,062
- It's all right, dude,
- you want a bump?
- 230
- 00:15:22,498 --> 00:15:24,233
- - I'm good.
- - I'm in.
- 231
- 00:15:24,266 --> 00:15:25,167
- Me too.
- 232
- 00:15:26,201 --> 00:15:28,070
- - Righty or lefty?
- - Righty.
- 233
- 00:15:31,406 --> 00:15:33,208
- There you go.
- 234
- 00:15:33,242 --> 00:15:34,142
- Boom.
- 235
- 00:15:42,217 --> 00:15:44,052
- Ali?
- 236
- 00:15:44,086 --> 00:15:46,623
- Yes, trust fund baby whose
- first words were room service?
- 237
- 00:15:47,556 --> 00:15:50,693
- Stop bottom beating.
- Give Mr. Nice Guy another shot.
- 238
- 00:15:50,727 --> 00:15:52,528
- Have you been banging him?
- 239
- 00:15:52,561 --> 00:15:55,564
- Not since I've
- been seeing Dead Guy.
- 240
- 00:15:55,598 --> 00:15:58,233
- - Rest in peace.
- - Wake up, Ali.
- 241
- 00:15:58,267 --> 00:16:00,737
- You're running out of runway,
- and he's Nice Guy.
- 242
- 00:16:07,342 --> 00:16:09,111
- When I forage for my food,
- 243
- 00:16:09,144 --> 00:16:11,648
- it allows me to focus
- on flavor and ideas.
- 244
- 00:16:13,282 --> 00:16:16,084
- To reconnect into the world
- that existed before we got...
- 245
- 00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:19,087
- little too fast.
- 246
- 00:16:20,623 --> 00:16:22,625
- In a really superficial world,
- 247
- 00:16:22,659 --> 00:16:24,794
- it's hard to get
- something that is real.
- 248
- 00:16:24,827 --> 00:16:27,362
- So Instagramable.
- 249
- 00:16:27,396 --> 00:16:29,264
- Can't have that level
- of uniqueness of flavor
- 250
- 00:16:29,298 --> 00:16:31,466
- unless you diversify
- what you're using.
- 251
- 00:16:31,500 --> 00:16:33,235
- Um, I'm all for diversity.
- 252
- 00:16:36,138 --> 00:16:37,640
- Um...
- 253
- 00:16:37,674 --> 00:16:39,508
- Get out, so good!
- 254
- 00:16:40,777 --> 00:16:42,077
- Um!
- 255
- 00:16:44,479 --> 00:16:45,648
- - Want more?
- - Yeah.
- 256
- 00:16:54,924 --> 00:16:57,392
- Ali, I'm not sure
- why you shut me out,
- 257
- 00:16:57,426 --> 00:16:59,328
- but I really missed you.
- 258
- 00:17:00,663 --> 00:17:03,700
- I missed you too,
- I'm glad I called.
- 259
- 00:17:03,733 --> 00:17:04,867
- How about you move in with me?
- 260
- 00:17:05,902 --> 00:17:07,569
- Whoa, no way.
- 261
- 00:17:07,604 --> 00:17:09,137
- I know, I know it's fast,
- 262
- 00:17:09,171 --> 00:17:10,740
- but you would love it here.
- 263
- 00:17:12,207 --> 00:17:15,210
- Right from the first time we met
- at that foster home fundraiser,
- 264
- 00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:18,146
- you said that being a mom
- was your greatest hope.
- 265
- 00:17:18,180 --> 00:17:20,783
- My specific hope
- was to be a parent
- 266
- 00:17:20,817 --> 00:17:22,919
- to a child who needed a home.
- 267
- 00:17:22,952 --> 00:17:24,754
- I figured
- if you're okay to fostering
- 268
- 00:17:24,787 --> 00:17:26,555
- you'd be open to the whole...
- 269
- 00:17:26,589 --> 00:17:28,190
- nuclear thing as well.
- 270
- 00:17:28,223 --> 00:17:29,524
- I think we're
- getting ahead of ourselves.
- 271
- 00:17:29,558 --> 00:17:31,894
- Cart before the horse
- and all that.
- 272
- 00:17:31,928 --> 00:17:33,696
- Listen, if you
- didn't like living here,
- 273
- 00:17:33,730 --> 00:17:35,765
- you could always leave.
- No drama.
- 274
- 00:17:38,567 --> 00:17:39,534
- Baby...
- 275
- 00:17:41,203 --> 00:17:42,337
- when it comes to you...
- 276
- 00:17:43,940 --> 00:17:44,841
- I'm all in.
- 277
- 00:17:48,611 --> 00:17:51,714
- So what do you say
- we get all in the pool?
- 278
- 00:17:52,715 --> 00:17:53,916
- Charming segue.
- 279
- 00:17:55,517 --> 00:17:58,186
- - It's beckoning.
- - Oh, is it now?
- 280
- 00:18:15,805 --> 00:18:17,272
- I have a surprise for you.
- 281
- 00:18:18,373 --> 00:18:20,242
- Something that
- I hope will turn you on.
- 282
- 00:18:22,612 --> 00:18:25,247
- I always thought that maybe
- you felt I was uptight in bed.
- 283
- 00:18:25,280 --> 00:18:26,916
- No, Jake, not at all.
- 284
- 00:18:28,584 --> 00:18:30,419
- It mean we need to be
- more adventurous together.
- 285
- 00:18:32,354 --> 00:18:34,389
- Meaning?
- 286
- 00:18:34,423 --> 00:18:36,759
- Uh, I think it's time
- to explore our fantasies a bit.
- 287
- 00:18:38,695 --> 00:18:40,328
- I asked someone to come over.
- 288
- 00:18:41,396 --> 00:18:43,700
- There is no romantic connection,
- 289
- 00:18:43,733 --> 00:18:45,467
- so, if you're interested...
- 290
- 00:18:45,500 --> 00:18:47,704
- Well, aren't you
- the unpredictable one?
- 291
- 00:18:50,539 --> 00:18:53,910
- When the hedges get trimmed,
- the tree stands taller.
- 292
- 00:19:04,587 --> 00:19:05,988
- And here she is right now.
- 293
- 00:19:06,022 --> 00:19:08,390
- Ali, this is Jazmine.
- Jazmine, Ali.
- 294
- 00:19:08,423 --> 00:19:09,524
- My pleasure.
- 295
- 00:19:09,558 --> 00:19:11,493
- Hi. Hi there.
- 296
- 00:19:14,496 --> 00:19:17,232
- Why don't you, uh,
- join us in the water?
- 297
- 00:19:33,683 --> 00:19:35,685
- And there it is.
- 298
- 00:19:35,718 --> 00:19:37,787
- You did say you're all
- for diversity.
- 299
- 00:19:54,604 --> 00:19:55,872
- Hey.
- 300
- 00:19:55,905 --> 00:19:57,707
- I'm so sorry,
- I should've told you
- 301
- 00:19:57,740 --> 00:19:58,808
- before I sprang that on you.
- 302
- 00:19:59,776 --> 00:20:01,978
- - You think?
- - I wanted to be real with you.
- 303
- 00:20:02,879 --> 00:20:04,546
- Doesn't mean I'm gay.
- 304
- 00:20:04,580 --> 00:20:06,015
- Not that there is
- anything wrong with it.
- 305
- 00:20:06,048 --> 00:20:08,383
- I just think I need
- some time to wrap
- 306
- 00:20:08,416 --> 00:20:10,887
- - my head around this.
- - Don't let this change things between us.
- 307
- 00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:13,623
- Uh, I got another call, I got to bounce.
- 308
- 00:20:13,656 --> 00:20:15,892
- Hey, will you still
- think about moving in...
- 309
- 00:20:15,925 --> 00:20:18,393
- Ah, shit.
- 310
- 00:20:18,426 --> 00:20:20,328
- - Hello?
- - Hi.
- 311
- 00:20:20,362 --> 00:20:21,496
- This is Chris Perley.
- 312
- 00:20:22,932 --> 00:20:25,768
- Detective Perley, from the,
- from the whole shooting thing.
- 313
- 00:20:25,802 --> 00:20:28,403
- You said that
- I could give you a call.
- 314
- 00:20:28,436 --> 00:20:29,404
- Is this a bad time?
- 315
- 00:20:31,506 --> 00:20:33,776
- Eight-year-old
- Margaret needs the stability
- 316
- 00:20:33,810 --> 00:20:36,012
- and love of a forever family.
- 317
- 00:20:36,045 --> 00:20:39,782
- In today's Foster Friday's,
- we meet this resilient girl.
- 318
- 00:20:44,954 --> 00:20:45,988
- Dylan.
- 319
- 00:20:46,889 --> 00:20:48,891
- - Hi, Miss Silver.
- - Hi.
- 320
- 00:20:48,925 --> 00:20:51,560
- I just wanted to make sure
- you were handling this well.
- 321
- 00:20:51,594 --> 00:20:52,662
- What?
- 322
- 00:20:52,695 --> 00:20:54,730
- You know, the talk.
- 323
- 00:20:54,764 --> 00:20:56,032
- It can be hard
- hearing about things
- 324
- 00:20:56,065 --> 00:20:57,566
- that are beyond your control.
- 325
- 00:20:57,600 --> 00:20:58,801
- What are
- you talking about?
- 326
- 00:20:59,936 --> 00:21:03,673
- That they're calling anything
- unusually small a "Dylan dick."
- 327
- 00:21:04,707 --> 00:21:06,508
- High schoolers can be so mean.
- 328
- 00:21:06,541 --> 00:21:08,778
- If you want to talk about it,
- my door is always open.
- 329
- 00:21:40,109 --> 00:21:42,011
- Miss Silver.
- 330
- 00:21:42,044 --> 00:21:43,913
- Finnegan.
- 331
- 00:21:43,946 --> 00:21:45,547
- I knew you'd still be in Malibu.
- 332
- 00:21:46,883 --> 00:21:49,051
- You don't look
- surprised or pleased.
- 333
- 00:21:50,052 --> 00:21:51,988
- Uh. It's...
- 334
- 00:21:52,922 --> 00:21:54,422
- - Can I come in?
- - Uh.
- 335
- 00:21:56,592 --> 00:21:57,860
- - Please?
- - Uh.
- 336
- 00:22:02,198 --> 00:22:04,532
- They let you
- have animals in rehab?
- 337
- 00:22:05,835 --> 00:22:07,870
- I'm in outpatient
- sober living now.
- 338
- 00:22:08,804 --> 00:22:09,839
- The dog is for you.
- 339
- 00:22:09,872 --> 00:22:11,040
- I'm allergic.
- 340
- 00:22:11,073 --> 00:22:13,441
- Oh, uh, oh.
- 341
- 00:22:13,475 --> 00:22:15,443
- I guess I'll keep him
- for myself.
- 342
- 00:22:15,477 --> 00:22:16,178
- Um.
- 343
- 00:22:18,648 --> 00:22:21,017
- So, uh, maybe you read
- 344
- 00:22:21,050 --> 00:22:22,785
- that my dad and me
- were in jail together,
- 345
- 00:22:23,853 --> 00:22:25,121
- for assaulting each other.
- 346
- 00:22:25,154 --> 00:22:26,622
- I may have seen
- something about it
- 347
- 00:22:26,656 --> 00:22:27,957
- in the rags
- at the checkout line.
- 348
- 00:22:27,990 --> 00:22:29,725
- What a perfect
- Shanksgiving that was.
- 349
- 00:22:32,261 --> 00:22:34,462
- That is when you spend
- Thanksgiving behind bars.
- 350
- 00:22:35,197 --> 00:22:36,866
- - Good to know.
- - Yeah.
- 351
- 00:22:38,267 --> 00:22:40,036
- Ali, uh...
- 352
- 00:22:41,536 --> 00:22:44,106
- this is the longest
- that I've been sober.
- 353
- 00:22:44,140 --> 00:22:45,741
- I've gone through
- most of the steps
- 354
- 00:22:45,775 --> 00:22:48,144
- and you are on my amends list.
- 355
- 00:22:48,177 --> 00:22:49,645
- About time.
- 356
- 00:22:49,679 --> 00:22:51,147
- Why do so many of my exes
- 357
- 00:22:51,180 --> 00:22:53,182
- wind up in rehab,
- but never make amends to me?
- 358
- 00:22:53,215 --> 00:22:54,984
- I'm trying to now.
- 359
- 00:22:55,017 --> 00:22:56,585
- I saw the dog and some old guy
- 360
- 00:22:56,619 --> 00:22:58,087
- was giving him away
- across the street.
- 361
- 00:22:58,120 --> 00:23:00,555
- I figured, that was a sign
- 362
- 00:23:00,589 --> 00:23:02,725
- to tell you that
- I'm really sorry.
- 363
- 00:23:02,758 --> 00:23:04,760
- Aren't you supposed to take into
- account that it might hurt me more
- 364
- 00:23:04,794 --> 00:23:06,128
- to have to deal with you again?
- 365
- 00:23:06,162 --> 00:23:07,663
- I'm pretty sure
- it won't go like that.
- 366
- 00:23:08,764 --> 00:23:12,101
- Listen, I have thought
- about this for many years,
- 367
- 00:23:12,134 --> 00:23:14,170
- and stayed away since
- I was a mess for so long.
- 368
- 00:23:15,204 --> 00:23:17,974
- I was an idiot back then.
- Be glad I disappeared.
- 369
- 00:23:18,007 --> 00:23:19,875
- Just because it was
- a long time ago
- 370
- 00:23:19,909 --> 00:23:21,677
- doesn't mean I forgot.
- 371
- 00:23:21,711 --> 00:23:25,247
- You slept with me
- knowing that I loved you,
- 372
- 00:23:25,281 --> 00:23:27,183
- and left me waiting
- for the call that never came.
- 373
- 00:23:28,317 --> 00:23:30,720
- You simply vanished
- like a guilty thought.
- 374
- 00:23:30,753 --> 00:23:34,123
- - I didn't mean it like that.
- - No, even that dog knows the difference between
- 375
- 00:23:34,156 --> 00:23:35,958
- being stumbled over
- and being kicked.
- 376
- 00:23:35,992 --> 00:23:38,194
- I want to make it up to you.
- I really do.
- 377
- 00:23:38,227 --> 00:23:39,895
- Can you give me
- my virginity back?
- 378
- 00:23:41,130 --> 00:23:44,300
- Let me set things right. Please.
- 379
- 00:23:44,333 --> 00:23:48,137
- At least let me try to help you
- understand the why of it all.
- 380
- 00:23:48,170 --> 00:23:49,839
- God willing, you'll, uh...
- 381
- 00:23:51,107 --> 00:23:52,808
- give me a second chance.
- 382
- 00:23:52,842 --> 00:23:54,542
- The last guy I gave
- a second chance to
- 383
- 00:23:54,577 --> 00:23:56,746
- ended up like Tony Montana.
- 384
- 00:23:56,779 --> 00:23:58,080
- "Say hello to my little friend."
- 385
- 00:23:59,315 --> 00:24:01,684
- You were always good
- at imitating other characters,
- 386
- 00:24:01,717 --> 00:24:04,086
- how are you doing
- at being yourself?
- 387
- 00:24:04,120 --> 00:24:04,954
- Ali.
- 388
- 00:24:07,089 --> 00:24:09,191
- Is it really
- a dog allergy or is it me?
- 389
- 00:24:11,327 --> 00:24:12,895
- We'll see.
- 390
- 00:24:12,928 --> 00:24:14,897
- You can call me
- on my school line,
- 391
- 00:24:14,930 --> 00:24:17,133
- and no stalking.
- 392
- 00:24:17,166 --> 00:24:20,302
- Oh, uh, that, that is
- good enough for me.
- 393
- 00:24:20,336 --> 00:24:21,971
- - Bye for now. Bye.
- - Bye.
- 394
- 00:24:24,306 --> 00:24:26,075
- You checking me out?
- 395
- 00:24:26,108 --> 00:24:28,711
- You may have changed, but you're
- still full of yourself.
- 396
- 00:24:28,744 --> 00:24:30,246
- Or full of something.
- 397
- 00:24:30,279 --> 00:24:31,814
- I'll take that as a yes.
- 398
- 00:24:31,847 --> 00:24:33,582
- Bye.
- 399
- 00:24:33,616 --> 00:24:35,651
- And now he wants to take
- you out to spread his bullshit
- 400
- 00:24:35,684 --> 00:24:37,887
- as if it's the peanut butter
- choosy mothers choose.
- 401
- 00:24:37,920 --> 00:24:40,723
- And you'll fall for it,
- hook, line and sinker.
- 402
- 00:24:40,756 --> 00:24:43,359
- I do have a sweet tooth
- for second chances.
- 403
- 00:24:43,392 --> 00:24:45,327
- And third, and fourth.
- 404
- 00:24:45,361 --> 00:24:47,196
- You've been on this merry-go-round
- too many times, Ali.
- 405
- 00:24:47,229 --> 00:24:48,998
- So what would you
- have me tell him?
- 406
- 00:24:49,031 --> 00:24:51,267
- I'd say what Clark Gable
- never quite said:
- 407
- 00:24:51,300 --> 00:24:53,602
- "Frankly, my duck,
- I don't give a fuck."
- 408
- 00:24:53,636 --> 00:24:54,904
- And ghost that douche nozzle.
- 409
- 00:24:54,937 --> 00:24:57,807
- We were both only 16.
- 410
- 00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:00,843
- Needless to say I didn't write
- about it in the virginity box.
- 411
- 00:25:00,876 --> 00:25:03,379
- But, maybe I could use
- some closure.
- 412
- 00:25:03,412 --> 00:25:04,613
- Maybe that'll work.
- 413
- 00:25:04,647 --> 00:25:06,782
- Damn, I forgot about that.
- 414
- 00:25:06,816 --> 00:25:08,918
- - What?
- - Our virginity box.
- 415
- 00:25:08,951 --> 00:25:11,754
- Oh, yeah! We painted
- cherries all over it,
- 416
- 00:25:11,787 --> 00:25:13,823
- and promised when either
- one of us lost our cherry...
- 417
- 00:25:13,856 --> 00:25:15,257
- We'd leave
- a note in the box!
- 418
- 00:25:16,859 --> 00:25:18,861
- I think I know
- where it is.
- 419
- 00:25:18,894 --> 00:25:21,130
- I can't believe you
- still had it squared away.
- 420
- 00:25:23,299 --> 00:25:24,800
- Now that is some dusty weed.
- 421
- 00:25:24,834 --> 00:25:27,336
- Swiped from my mom's
- secret stash.
- 422
- 00:25:27,369 --> 00:25:29,939
- I can't believe we didn't
- smoke or drink this all.
- 423
- 00:25:29,972 --> 00:25:32,041
- No, we were saving some
- in case of an earthquake
- 424
- 00:25:32,074 --> 00:25:33,409
- or a nuclear fallout.
- 425
- 00:25:33,442 --> 00:25:35,277
- Remember the first time
- we got wasted?
- 426
- 00:25:35,311 --> 00:25:38,180
- - It was like, 14, I think.
- - Thirteen.
- 427
- 00:25:38,214 --> 00:25:40,916
- Oh, and we tried to roll
- a joint with a tampon wrapper.
- 428
- 00:25:40,950 --> 00:25:43,419
- And you had this bright idea
- of using notebook paper.
- 429
- 00:25:43,452 --> 00:25:45,321
- Fuck off, that was your idea.
- 430
- 00:25:45,354 --> 00:25:47,857
- "Qualities of a devirginizer."
- 431
- 00:25:47,890 --> 00:25:50,326
- He must be hilarious.
- 432
- 00:25:50,359 --> 00:25:52,828
- - Oh, ride gnarly waves.
- - Love movies.
- 433
- 00:25:52,862 --> 00:25:53,996
- Be humble.
- 434
- 00:25:54,029 --> 00:25:56,065
- Wear boxers.
- 435
- 00:25:57,133 --> 00:25:58,367
- Great dancer.
- 436
- 00:25:58,400 --> 00:25:59,835
- Luscious lips.
- 437
- 00:26:01,003 --> 00:26:05,975
- He must not be embarrassed
- to make valentines with us.
- 438
- 00:26:06,008 --> 00:26:08,644
- - Be a Scorpio.
- - Be a Taurus.
- 439
- 00:26:09,879 --> 00:26:10,913
- Um, look at this.
- 440
- 00:26:11,847 --> 00:26:14,216
- And they lived
- happily ever after.
- 441
- 00:26:15,151 --> 00:26:16,752
- Now there is
- some wishful thinking.
- 442
- 00:26:18,154 --> 00:26:21,123
- - And the dog?
- - Turns out he has leukemia.
- 443
- 00:26:21,157 --> 00:26:22,958
- Started to take him
- to chemo twice a week.
- 444
- 00:26:24,059 --> 00:26:25,828
- There is a reason
- he ended up in my hands,
- 445
- 00:26:25,861 --> 00:26:26,962
- so I could take care of him.
- 446
- 00:26:27,930 --> 00:26:29,732
- I really am allergic.
- 447
- 00:26:29,765 --> 00:26:30,666
- Mm-hmm.
- 448
- 00:26:31,767 --> 00:26:33,936
- So, do you like this place?
- 449
- 00:26:34,870 --> 00:26:38,807
- It's just like the surf shop
- we used to hang out on the PCH.
- 450
- 00:26:40,075 --> 00:26:41,777
- Good times.
- 451
- 00:26:41,810 --> 00:26:43,145
- I own it.
- 452
- 00:26:43,179 --> 00:26:44,813
- Get out!
- 453
- 00:26:44,847 --> 00:26:46,715
- My crew thinks that
- I should put up posters
- 454
- 00:26:46,749 --> 00:26:49,051
- of my father rocking
- out on stage or something.
- 455
- 00:26:50,186 --> 00:26:51,453
- The old school surfers
- would love it,
- 456
- 00:26:51,487 --> 00:26:53,255
- but I wanted this
- to be the one thing
- 457
- 00:26:53,289 --> 00:26:55,090
- that I did without
- his shadow over it.
- 458
- 00:26:55,124 --> 00:26:56,825
- So, I used the money
- from that train wreck
- 459
- 00:26:56,859 --> 00:26:58,260
- reality show to buy this place.
- 460
- 00:26:59,261 --> 00:27:00,296
- None of it was his money.
- 461
- 00:27:03,232 --> 00:27:06,001
- We used to talk about owning
- a place like this one day.
- 462
- 00:27:06,035 --> 00:27:06,936
- We did?
- 463
- 00:27:08,137 --> 00:27:09,972
- Ali, I can't remember
- all the things
- 464
- 00:27:10,005 --> 00:27:11,740
- that I did to hurt you.
- 465
- 00:27:11,774 --> 00:27:13,509
- A, you were
- so coked up after prom
- 466
- 00:27:13,542 --> 00:27:15,811
- you couldn't keep it
- hard enough to finish.
- 467
- 00:27:15,844 --> 00:27:17,279
- Then maybe it doesn't count.
- 468
- 00:27:17,313 --> 00:27:18,380
- You made me bleed.
- 469
- 00:27:19,915 --> 00:27:21,383
- It counts.
- 470
- 00:27:21,417 --> 00:27:23,452
- And you lied to me
- that it was your first time,
- 471
- 00:27:23,485 --> 00:27:25,821
- but then I found out
- about your devirginizing spree
- 472
- 00:27:25,854 --> 00:27:27,823
- and that I was
- just number whatever.
- 473
- 00:27:27,856 --> 00:27:28,958
- I wished you were my first.
- 474
- 00:27:30,059 --> 00:27:32,394
- Not some random who
- really wanted to screw my dad.
- 475
- 00:27:33,462 --> 00:27:36,031
- I was a consolation prize,
- but good enough so that she could boast
- 476
- 00:27:36,065 --> 00:27:38,000
- that she got it on
- with the son of a rock god.
- 477
- 00:27:38,033 --> 00:27:38,968
- I was 13.
- 478
- 00:27:40,903 --> 00:27:43,772
- Ali, I went through all those women
- knowing that you were different.
- 479
- 00:27:43,806 --> 00:27:45,507
- That you were like an angel,
- way too good for me.
- 480
- 00:27:45,541 --> 00:27:47,943
- - Hardly an angel.
- - Well, I made a pact with myself
- 481
- 00:27:47,977 --> 00:27:49,178
- to stay far away to protect you.
- 482
- 00:27:51,013 --> 00:27:54,316
- I have no excuses,
- but I have my reasons.
- 483
- 00:27:54,350 --> 00:27:57,152
- Did you have a reason
- that you left me right after?
- 484
- 00:27:57,186 --> 00:27:58,320
- Not a word.
- 485
- 00:27:59,822 --> 00:28:01,123
- Where the hell
- did you go, anyway?
- 486
- 00:28:03,092 --> 00:28:04,026
- I went to a dealer.
- 487
- 00:28:05,127 --> 00:28:06,562
- My father's dealer, actually,
- 488
- 00:28:06,596 --> 00:28:08,497
- and the three of us
- smoked crack all night.
- 489
- 00:28:09,498 --> 00:28:11,133
- The start of a week-long bender.
- 490
- 00:28:12,468 --> 00:28:14,169
- You chose drugs over me.
- 491
- 00:28:14,203 --> 00:28:17,239
- Back then, and for many years,
- 492
- 00:28:17,273 --> 00:28:19,341
- I would choose drugs
- over anything.
- 493
- 00:28:20,976 --> 00:28:22,344
- But not anymore?
- 494
- 00:28:22,378 --> 00:28:25,080
- No, no, no, no.
- 495
- 00:28:25,114 --> 00:28:26,548
- I'm alive.
- 496
- 00:28:26,583 --> 00:28:28,017
- And I'm glad to be right here.
- 497
- 00:28:29,551 --> 00:28:30,452
- Me too.
- 498
- 00:28:31,621 --> 00:28:33,355
- I loved you then, Ali.
- 499
- 00:28:33,389 --> 00:28:35,524
- I messed up
- and I haven't forgotten it.
- 500
- 00:28:36,992 --> 00:28:38,360
- I'm not asking
- for your forgiveness,
- 501
- 00:28:38,394 --> 00:28:39,461
- but maybe someday...
- 502
- 00:28:41,163 --> 00:28:44,199
- Well, I admit, I,
- I've been selfish
- 503
- 00:28:44,233 --> 00:28:46,235
- to make assumptions
- about your life
- 504
- 00:28:46,268 --> 00:28:50,239
- and been blaming you
- for all the loser men in mine,
- 505
- 00:28:50,272 --> 00:28:53,042
- even though I've heard about
- your troubles in the tabloids,
- 506
- 00:28:53,075 --> 00:28:55,477
- and reading
- your brother's memoir.
- 507
- 00:28:55,511 --> 00:28:58,180
- Well, that gave you some idea of
- the shit show that I went through.
- 508
- 00:29:00,149 --> 00:29:01,216
- What do you say to a truce?
- 509
- 00:29:06,055 --> 00:29:07,556
- Sounds good.
- 510
- 00:29:07,590 --> 00:29:10,125
- Better yet, how about a do-over?
- 511
- 00:29:11,460 --> 00:29:13,128
- Did you do
- your homework, Billy?
- 512
- 00:29:14,930 --> 00:29:18,233
- "Fears of a teen with
- sitophobia and numerophobia."
- 513
- 00:29:18,267 --> 00:29:20,002
- You got the names down pat.
- 514
- 00:29:20,035 --> 00:29:21,638
- Yeah, I remember sitophobia
- 515
- 00:29:21,671 --> 00:29:24,039
- because it sounds
- like shitaphobia,
- 516
- 00:29:24,073 --> 00:29:27,309
- - without the H.
- - Okay, go on.
- 517
- 00:29:27,343 --> 00:29:29,445
- "All of my fears come
- down to the same thing:
- 518
- 00:29:29,478 --> 00:29:31,013
- If I don't do things my way,
- 519
- 00:29:31,046 --> 00:29:32,649
- then something
- dreadful will happen.
- 520
- 00:29:32,682 --> 00:29:35,384
- If the TV volume
- isn't an odd number,
- 521
- 00:29:35,417 --> 00:29:38,153
- then something terrible will happen.
- If the TV channel isn't odd,
- 522
- 00:29:38,187 --> 00:29:40,189
- then something terrible
- will happen."
- 523
- 00:29:40,222 --> 00:29:41,624
- So much for watching
- Bojack Horseman.
- 524
- 00:29:42,524 --> 00:29:45,294
- "If I choose a candy
- from your box of them,
- 525
- 00:29:45,327 --> 00:29:47,262
- then it has to be three candies
- over and three down.
- 526
- 00:29:48,263 --> 00:29:50,132
- Or I'll get a dreadful disease."
- 527
- 00:29:50,165 --> 00:29:51,533
- You know what, Billy?
- 528
- 00:29:51,567 --> 00:29:53,502
- Thoughts are just thoughts,
- not threats.
- 529
- 00:29:55,337 --> 00:29:58,907
- I, I can't go back on the meds.
- 530
- 00:29:58,941 --> 00:30:00,242
- I already told my psychiatrist,
- 531
- 00:30:00,275 --> 00:30:01,644
- they make me feel dopey all day.
- 532
- 00:30:01,678 --> 00:30:04,980
- Okay, you know what?
- Let's talk progress.
- 533
- 00:30:05,013 --> 00:30:06,315
- Like the exposure therapy.
- 534
- 00:30:07,950 --> 00:30:09,084
- Well, my mom couldn't believe
- 535
- 00:30:09,118 --> 00:30:11,086
- that I only put my clothes
- 536
- 00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:13,355
- in the washer once
- instead of three or five times.
- 537
- 00:30:13,389 --> 00:30:14,624
- See?
- 538
- 00:30:14,657 --> 00:30:16,325
- That's terrific.
- 539
- 00:30:16,358 --> 00:30:17,594
- You know, I think
- you're ready for this one,
- 540
- 00:30:17,627 --> 00:30:19,194
- otherwise I wouldn't offer it.
- 541
- 00:30:26,468 --> 00:30:28,270
- One, two, three,
- one, two, three.
- 542
- 00:30:29,571 --> 00:30:30,572
- I, I'm not hungry.
- 543
- 00:30:30,607 --> 00:30:32,241
- - Billy.
- - No.
- 544
- 00:30:32,274 --> 00:30:34,677
- My friend Veronica
- makes these chocolates.
- 545
- 00:30:34,711 --> 00:30:36,311
- I've seen her little factory,
- 546
- 00:30:36,345 --> 00:30:39,014
- it's so clean,
- you could eat off the floor.
- 547
- 00:30:39,047 --> 00:30:40,983
- - Ali.
- - Okay, okay, maybe you wouldn't,
- 548
- 00:30:41,016 --> 00:30:42,551
- but let me just tell
- you something, these chocolates
- 549
- 00:30:42,585 --> 00:30:44,420
- are not going to
- give you a disease.
- 550
- 00:30:44,453 --> 00:30:46,321
- I can promise you that.
- And you want to know what?
- 551
- 00:30:46,355 --> 00:30:48,490
- They're really delicious.
- 552
- 00:30:48,524 --> 00:30:51,560
- You can do it,
- just close your eyes,
- 553
- 00:30:51,594 --> 00:30:54,029
- anchor your positive thoughts,
- 554
- 00:30:54,062 --> 00:30:55,998
- and pick a random piece.
- 555
- 00:31:19,589 --> 00:31:21,490
- I bet I know what this is.
- 556
- 00:31:23,025 --> 00:31:25,160
- Two free tickets
- to that deprivation tank
- 557
- 00:31:25,194 --> 00:31:26,596
- I was telling you about.
- 558
- 00:31:26,629 --> 00:31:29,264
- - You should come with me.
- - Oh, I'm claustrophobic.
- 559
- 00:31:29,298 --> 00:31:32,067
- Two hours floating
- in water in total blackness?
- 560
- 00:31:32,100 --> 00:31:34,269
- It's also in blackness
- that we see the light.
- 561
- 00:31:35,270 --> 00:31:38,373
- Is that one of those
- wise Persian sayings?
- 562
- 00:31:38,407 --> 00:31:39,308
- Think about it.
- 563
- 00:31:48,283 --> 00:31:49,652
- My lady.
- 564
- 00:31:49,686 --> 00:31:51,520
- I see you wore
- your best bib and tucker.
- 565
- 00:31:52,488 --> 00:31:55,524
- And you look like a waiter
- in a 1980's luau.
- 566
- 00:31:58,160 --> 00:31:59,328
- Our carriage awaits.
- 567
- 00:32:03,432 --> 00:32:05,267
- We're making
- such an effort to find out
- 568
- 00:32:05,300 --> 00:32:07,670
- if there's intelligent life
- out there on other planets,
- 569
- 00:32:07,704 --> 00:32:10,272
- but did we ever think that,
- if it existed,
- 570
- 00:32:10,305 --> 00:32:12,140
- they would be doing
- the same thing?
- 571
- 00:32:12,174 --> 00:32:14,611
- Trying to find us.
- Think about it.
- 572
- 00:32:14,644 --> 00:32:16,779
- The most important evidence
- that we're alone,
- 573
- 00:32:17,680 --> 00:32:19,481
- is that we are alone.
- 574
- 00:32:26,154 --> 00:32:28,190
- We should go to church sometime.
- 575
- 00:32:28,223 --> 00:32:30,125
- You do know I'm Jewish.
- 576
- 00:32:30,158 --> 00:32:32,327
- Only half,
- your mom is Christian.
- 577
- 00:32:32,361 --> 00:32:35,464
- She married four Jewish guys,
- Jewish by injection.
- 578
- 00:32:37,132 --> 00:32:38,367
- Sorry, that was crass.
- 579
- 00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:39,669
- You'll, you'll figure it out.
- 580
- 00:32:42,104 --> 00:32:43,539
- Well, how about this Sunday?
- 581
- 00:32:43,572 --> 00:32:45,507
- There is a potluck
- and there is a band, and...
- 582
- 00:32:45,541 --> 00:32:47,543
- You don't
- have to try so hard.
- 583
- 00:32:49,278 --> 00:32:51,146
- I'm sorry, I'm not used
- to doing this sober.
- 584
- 00:32:52,147 --> 00:32:55,818
- I'm just worried. Driver, turn this
- thing around and let's get home and...
- 585
- 00:32:55,852 --> 00:32:57,754
- Do you know why
- we have this spot here?
- 586
- 00:32:58,855 --> 00:33:00,623
- This indentation.
- 587
- 00:33:00,657 --> 00:33:02,524
- Tell me.
- 588
- 00:33:02,558 --> 00:33:04,727
- I was at this meditation retreat
- and there was a shaman there.
- 589
- 00:33:04,761 --> 00:33:07,229
- You believe in that stuff?
- 590
- 00:33:07,262 --> 00:33:08,263
- I'm always searching.
- 591
- 00:33:09,431 --> 00:33:11,801
- So, he was talking about angels
- and I couldn't relate,
- 592
- 00:33:11,834 --> 00:33:14,303
- so he said this thing
- that rang true to me.
- 593
- 00:33:14,336 --> 00:33:17,674
- He said, "Before we come
- into this world as a baby,
- 594
- 00:33:17,707 --> 00:33:19,341
- we already know everything
- 595
- 00:33:19,374 --> 00:33:21,543
- about our past,
- present and future.
- 596
- 00:33:22,812 --> 00:33:26,583
- But, at the exact
- moment of birth,
- 597
- 00:33:26,616 --> 00:33:30,319
- an angel comes down
- and goes: 'Shh...'
- 598
- 00:33:31,588 --> 00:33:33,155
- So we spend our whole lives
- 599
- 00:33:33,188 --> 00:33:35,090
- trying to remember
- what we already know."
- 600
- 00:33:39,227 --> 00:33:41,129
- Finn, you made your mark on me.
- 601
- 00:33:42,765 --> 00:33:43,666
- Permanent.
- 602
- 00:33:44,634 --> 00:33:45,635
- Like a tattoo.
- 603
- 00:33:46,568 --> 00:33:50,339
- Bad tattoo, but hey, we were 16.
- 604
- 00:33:52,609 --> 00:33:54,543
- And I'm ready for our do-over.
- 605
- 00:35:33,508 --> 00:35:34,677
- I have a condom.
- 606
- 00:35:36,445 --> 00:35:37,680
- We don't need it.
- 607
- 00:35:37,714 --> 00:35:39,314
- Oh, I insist.
- 608
- 00:35:41,751 --> 00:35:45,655
- We can mess around,
- but not all the way.
- 609
- 00:35:46,789 --> 00:35:48,591
- Okay.
- 610
- 00:35:48,624 --> 00:35:49,558
- Why not?
- 611
- 00:35:53,996 --> 00:35:55,198
- When I hit bottom...
- 612
- 00:35:56,565 --> 00:35:57,700
- I found Jesus.
- 613
- 00:35:59,736 --> 00:36:01,938
- Was he playing hide and seek?
- 614
- 00:36:03,973 --> 00:36:06,776
- He came to me, he spoke to me.
- 615
- 00:36:06,809 --> 00:36:10,545
- Oh. Eight billion people
- and he spoke to you?
- 616
- 00:36:10,580 --> 00:36:11,714
- He speaks to many.
- 617
- 00:36:13,916 --> 00:36:15,818
- He showed me the way
- and it's the path I've taken.
- 618
- 00:36:17,419 --> 00:36:18,386
- I'm celibate.
- 619
- 00:36:19,521 --> 00:36:22,592
- As in "you'll sell-a-bit"
- and give the rest for free?
- 620
- 00:36:23,793 --> 00:36:24,694
- I mean it.
- 621
- 00:36:26,528 --> 00:36:28,530
- I know this is weird
- coming from me.
- 622
- 00:36:31,868 --> 00:36:32,802
- Finn?
- 623
- 00:36:34,369 --> 00:36:36,471
- You said this was our do-over,
- 624
- 00:36:36,505 --> 00:36:39,776
- like as in you'd make love to me
- 625
- 00:36:39,809 --> 00:36:42,477
- on high thread count linens.
- 626
- 00:36:42,511 --> 00:36:44,046
- As in you wouldn't
- kick me to the curb.
- 627
- 00:36:44,080 --> 00:36:45,882
- As in you wouldn't
- disappear without a trace.
- 628
- 00:36:45,915 --> 00:36:47,516
- I don't want to disappear.
- 629
- 00:36:48,584 --> 00:36:51,621
- Ali, we definitely
- have a connection.
- 630
- 00:36:51,654 --> 00:36:53,522
- We could start
- going to church together.
- 631
- 00:36:53,555 --> 00:36:55,457
- There is a lot of cool
- born-again couples.
- 632
- 00:36:55,490 --> 00:36:58,928
- Two weeks ago, I suddenly found
- myself speaking in tongues.
- 633
- 00:37:04,734 --> 00:37:06,669
- We can still be naked.
- 634
- 00:37:07,703 --> 00:37:09,071
- I'll even go down on you.
- 635
- 00:37:09,105 --> 00:37:11,107
- Oh, how generous.
- 636
- 00:37:11,140 --> 00:37:14,543
- I just can't go further
- until you're truly committed.
- 637
- 00:37:14,577 --> 00:37:17,914
- - To?
- - Accepting Jesus Christ as your lord and savior.
- 638
- 00:37:19,414 --> 00:37:22,450
- Sex is only for married couples
- to create babies.
- 639
- 00:37:22,484 --> 00:37:24,620
- I want us to go
- to heaven together,
- 640
- 00:37:24,654 --> 00:37:25,888
- but I'm worried about you.
- 641
- 00:37:25,922 --> 00:37:27,455
- About me?
- 642
- 00:37:27,489 --> 00:37:29,725
- Hanging out with sinners.
- 643
- 00:37:29,759 --> 00:37:32,028
- Didn't Jesus hang out
- with a prostitute?
- 644
- 00:37:33,029 --> 00:37:34,764
- Hell is real.
- 645
- 00:37:34,797 --> 00:37:37,633
- Ali, you can't compromise God,
- it's in Revelation.
- 646
- 00:37:37,667 --> 00:37:39,735
- God said, "Because you're
- neither hot nor cold,
- 647
- 00:37:39,769 --> 00:37:40,903
- I spit you out of my mouth."
- 648
- 00:37:44,974 --> 00:37:47,944
- I don't want you to end up
- in eternal damnation.
- 649
- 00:38:33,488 --> 00:38:38,060
- Friends, lovers, losers,
- lend me your ears.
- 650
- 00:38:38,094 --> 00:38:40,963
- I come not to praise men,
- but to bury them.
- 651
- 00:38:40,997 --> 00:38:43,465
- New name for Finnegan, anybody?
- 652
- 00:38:43,498 --> 00:38:45,001
- "Jesus of Malibu."
- 653
- 00:38:45,034 --> 00:38:47,603
- - "Born again Finnegan."
- - "Christ on a soft core."
- 654
- 00:38:47,637 --> 00:38:50,538
- Oh, oh, Finnegan
- won't put it in again.
- 655
- 00:38:52,775 --> 00:38:53,976
- Yeah, wait, wait, wait.
- 656
- 00:38:54,010 --> 00:38:55,945
- I have something to praise to.
- 657
- 00:38:55,978 --> 00:38:59,481
- Guess who has
- the best dick in Malibu?
- 658
- 00:39:01,083 --> 00:39:02,885
- Ali's brother, John!
- 659
- 00:39:02,919 --> 00:39:04,519
- No!
- 660
- 00:39:04,552 --> 00:39:05,955
- You didn't, oh.
- 661
- 00:39:05,988 --> 00:39:08,024
- I gave him a grain job.
- 662
- 00:39:08,057 --> 00:39:09,524
- What is a grain job?
- 663
- 00:39:09,557 --> 00:39:12,161
- A blow job in a hybrid.
- 664
- 00:39:12,194 --> 00:39:14,730
- That is so disgusting
- on so many levels.
- 665
- 00:39:15,798 --> 00:39:19,201
- I present to you my one
- faithful girlfriend:
- 666
- 00:39:21,237 --> 00:39:22,204
- Molly.
- 667
- 00:39:27,610 --> 00:39:28,911
- Darling.
- 668
- 00:39:28,945 --> 00:39:30,512
- - Thank you.
- - You're welcome.
- 669
- 00:39:35,251 --> 00:39:36,719
- I'm happy where I am.
- 670
- 00:39:38,254 --> 00:39:40,923
- Fuck it, I want to be
- somewhere else, I'm in.
- 671
- 00:39:44,160 --> 00:39:45,061
- I'm out.
- 672
- 00:39:46,028 --> 00:39:47,830
- Oh, don't do me like that.
- 673
- 00:39:48,798 --> 00:39:50,900
- Yeah, you're really ready
- to be a mom.
- 674
- 00:40:12,254 --> 00:40:16,258
- You'd have to be Rosetta Stone
- to understand that.
- 675
- 00:40:24,800 --> 00:40:26,902
- You want to try some things?
- 676
- 00:40:28,570 --> 00:40:29,872
- Kiss me.
- 677
- 00:40:32,641 --> 00:40:34,944
- So you can go to prison
- for doing this?
- 678
- 00:40:34,977 --> 00:40:37,213
- Oh, yeah, nothing
- that can seem like dancing
- 679
- 00:40:37,246 --> 00:40:39,115
- between man and woman.
- 680
- 00:40:39,148 --> 00:40:40,616
- Between two men.
- 681
- 00:40:47,590 --> 00:40:49,125
- No wonder you white tailed it.
- 682
- 00:40:49,158 --> 00:40:52,762
- Yeah, the moment I got out
- of Iranian air space,
- 683
- 00:40:52,795 --> 00:40:54,630
- I tossed my hijab
- 684
- 00:40:54,663 --> 00:40:56,298
- and I ordered champagne
- 685
- 00:40:56,332 --> 00:40:58,634
- on my way to USA.
- 686
- 00:40:58,667 --> 00:41:00,302
- God bless America.
- 687
- 00:41:01,837 --> 00:41:04,965
- How long have I known you, Joe?
- 688
- 00:41:05,007 --> 00:41:07,968
- Time is relative.
- 689
- 00:41:08,010 --> 00:41:10,637
- And in all of that time,
- 690
- 00:41:10,679 --> 00:41:12,890
- Have I ever asked if you can...
- 691
- 00:41:12,931 --> 00:41:15,017
- You never asked.
- 692
- 00:41:15,559 --> 00:41:17,978
- Are you able to have sex?
- 693
- 00:41:19,813 --> 00:41:22,524
- Yes, why do you ask?
- 694
- 00:41:23,859 --> 00:41:27,029
- Cause I'm diggng you hella heavy...
- 695
- 00:41:30,366 --> 00:41:33,803
- You're not doing this
- because you feel sorry for me?
- 696
- 00:41:33,836 --> 00:41:35,271
- Because I don't
- want anybody's pity.
- 697
- 00:41:35,304 --> 00:41:36,705
- No, I'm doing this because
- 698
- 00:41:36,739 --> 00:41:38,941
- it makes me feel good right now.
- 699
- 00:41:38,974 --> 00:41:41,877
- I think we have a connection.
- 700
- 00:41:41,911 --> 00:41:44,113
- Don't you think
- we have a connection?
- 701
- 00:41:46,816 --> 00:41:48,651
- Fuck, yeah.
- 702
- 00:42:20,983 --> 00:42:22,051
- Hello?
- 703
- 00:42:22,084 --> 00:42:23,652
- Hi, this is Detective Perley
- 704
- 00:42:23,686 --> 00:42:25,054
- from the Malibu
- Sheriff's Department.
- 705
- 00:42:25,087 --> 00:42:27,022
- I hope I'm not
- calling too early.
- 706
- 00:42:27,056 --> 00:42:29,391
- No. Um,
- 707
- 00:42:29,425 --> 00:42:32,862
- I'm sorry about
- not calling you back. I, um.
- 708
- 00:42:32,895 --> 00:42:34,430
- No problem, no problem.
- I'm actually phoning
- 709
- 00:42:34,463 --> 00:42:35,898
- regarding Brock Sheridan.
- 710
- 00:42:35,931 --> 00:42:37,266
- I have something
- that I think you'd want.
- 711
- 00:42:38,367 --> 00:42:40,870
- - Oh, what's that?
- - Um.
- 712
- 00:42:40,903 --> 00:42:42,404
- Well, I thought
- it must have been stolen,
- 713
- 00:42:42,438 --> 00:42:44,740
- but it wasn't reported,
- so I took a closer look
- 714
- 00:42:44,773 --> 00:42:46,275
- and it was engraved.
- 715
- 00:42:46,308 --> 00:42:48,344
- Ali and Brock forever.
- 716
- 00:42:49,845 --> 00:42:50,913
- It's an engagement ring.
- 717
- 00:42:51,814 --> 00:42:52,715
- Oh.
- 718
- 00:42:55,417 --> 00:42:57,119
- It's, uh, here at the station,
- 719
- 00:42:57,153 --> 00:42:58,654
- if you want to come by
- and pick it up.
- 720
- 00:42:59,388 --> 00:43:01,056
- Or I could bring it to you.
- 721
- 00:43:02,458 --> 00:43:04,727
- Uh, could I call you back?
- 722
- 00:43:04,760 --> 00:43:06,896
- There's somebody at the door.
- 723
- 00:43:06,929 --> 00:43:08,164
- Bad timing again, okay.
- 724
- 00:43:08,197 --> 00:43:09,999
- Um, well, it's
- under lock and key
- 725
- 00:43:10,032 --> 00:43:12,134
- so come by whenever you can...
- 726
- 00:43:13,235 --> 00:43:14,136
- Hello?
- 727
- 00:43:20,209 --> 00:43:21,210
- Ugh.
- 728
- 00:43:22,311 --> 00:43:24,213
- What happened to you?
- 729
- 00:43:24,246 --> 00:43:29,185
- Let's just say my party
- went from ecstasy to agony.
- 730
- 00:43:29,218 --> 00:43:30,819
- Consequences.
- 731
- 00:43:30,853 --> 00:43:33,389
- Well, don't gloat
- just because you were right.
- 732
- 00:43:33,422 --> 00:43:34,857
- Plus, it was
- a shitty thing to say,
- 733
- 00:43:34,890 --> 00:43:36,992
- about me not
- being ready to be a mom.
- 734
- 00:43:37,026 --> 00:43:39,361
- Yeah, I thought
- about that, wasn't cool.
- 735
- 00:43:39,395 --> 00:43:40,863
- You're supposed
- to be on my side,
- 736
- 00:43:40,896 --> 00:43:42,064
- even when you know I'm wrong.
- 737
- 00:43:42,097 --> 00:43:43,365
- I'm sorry.
- 738
- 00:43:43,399 --> 00:43:45,100
- And I need a favor.
- 739
- 00:43:45,134 --> 00:43:49,471
- I expect to see
- some groveling first.
- 740
- 00:43:49,505 --> 00:43:51,273
- Pick up Chloe
- from school tomorrow?
- 741
- 00:43:51,307 --> 00:43:52,474
- I have a convention.
- 742
- 00:43:53,509 --> 00:43:55,110
- - I'd love to.
- - Great.
- 743
- 00:43:56,345 --> 00:43:58,514
- You know what, Ali,
- what I should have said was
- 744
- 00:43:58,547 --> 00:44:00,449
- you don't need a man
- to complete you.
- 745
- 00:44:00,482 --> 00:44:02,851
- You don't even need
- a man to raise a child.
- 746
- 00:44:02,885 --> 00:44:04,086
- I guess.
- 747
- 00:44:04,119 --> 00:44:05,988
- - Guess?
- - Suppose.
- 748
- 00:44:06,021 --> 00:44:08,757
- - Suppose?
- - All right, I know!
- 749
- 00:44:08,791 --> 00:44:10,092
- Well then, pull your head
- out of your butt
- 750
- 00:44:10,125 --> 00:44:11,160
- and do something about it.
- 751
- 00:44:12,161 --> 00:44:14,797
- You can handle it, I think.
- 752
- 00:44:14,830 --> 00:44:18,133
- You know, if you'll excuse me,
- I'm late for a pity party.
- 753
- 00:44:18,167 --> 00:44:19,535
- What else is wrong?
- 754
- 00:44:19,568 --> 00:44:21,804
- Let's see, my goody
- two-shoes doctor
- 755
- 00:44:21,837 --> 00:44:23,405
- won't prescribe me
- enough pain pills,
- 756
- 00:44:23,439 --> 00:44:25,841
- my neck is killing me.
- 757
- 00:44:25,874 --> 00:44:29,111
- And I got a marriage proposal
- from beyond the grave.
- 758
- 00:44:29,144 --> 00:44:31,880
- Dead Guy's ghost? Damn.
- 759
- 00:44:31,914 --> 00:44:33,816
- Stay with me, V?
- 760
- 00:44:33,849 --> 00:44:36,452
- I got Haagen-Dazs
- and I don't want to be alone.
- 761
- 00:44:36,485 --> 00:44:38,120
- You know I would if I could.
- 762
- 00:44:38,153 --> 00:44:40,322
- I got to pick up Chloe
- from a birthday party.
- 763
- 00:44:40,356 --> 00:44:41,257
- Got to bolt.
- 764
- 00:44:43,058 --> 00:44:43,993
- Love you.
- 765
- 00:44:53,535 --> 00:44:54,903
- Aw!
- 766
- 00:44:55,605 --> 00:44:56,805
- Baby.
- 767
- 00:44:58,340 --> 00:44:59,441
- Got your message.
- 768
- 00:45:00,509 --> 00:45:02,878
- I have solutions
- to all your troubles.
- 769
- 00:45:05,848 --> 00:45:08,250
- Ex-girlfriend is
- an anesthesiologist.
- 770
- 00:45:08,284 --> 00:45:10,486
- Still writes me
- as many scripts as I want.
- 771
- 00:45:10,519 --> 00:45:12,554
- We'll begin with OxyContin
- 772
- 00:45:12,589 --> 00:45:14,857
- and Adderall,
- 773
- 00:45:14,890 --> 00:45:16,892
- maybe some pot.
- 774
- 00:45:16,925 --> 00:45:18,927
- Keeps everything smooth.
- 775
- 00:45:22,431 --> 00:45:24,066
- Oh!
- 776
- 00:45:59,335 --> 00:46:01,103
- We party all life!
- 777
- 00:46:05,608 --> 00:46:08,310
- Hey dude, check it out. This is what
- she was like for my appointment.
- 778
- 00:46:10,580 --> 00:46:12,147
- Oh, my gosh.
- 779
- 00:46:14,651 --> 00:46:17,052
- Oh, out for the count.
- 780
- 00:46:58,394 --> 00:47:01,563
- Oh, fuck. Shit, shit, shit.
- 781
- 00:47:01,598 --> 00:47:03,499
- - How could you flake on this?
- - I just...
- 782
- 00:47:03,532 --> 00:47:05,300
- I, I, I fell, I fell asleep.
- 783
- 00:47:05,334 --> 00:47:07,670
- - I totally spaced. Is she okay?
- - If it was just me.
- 784
- 00:47:07,704 --> 00:47:09,606
- But my child, your goddaughter.
- 785
- 00:47:09,639 --> 00:47:11,573
- - But, but, but Chloe's okay?
- - I told you I couldn't be there.
- 786
- 00:47:11,608 --> 00:47:13,342
- I know, I know.
- 787
- 00:47:13,375 --> 00:47:15,511
- I, I'm so sorry.
- 788
- 00:47:15,544 --> 00:47:16,579
- But is she okay?
- 789
- 00:47:16,613 --> 00:47:18,581
- For fucks sake, yes, she's okay.
- 790
- 00:47:18,615 --> 00:47:20,382
- My ex mother-in-law was able
- 791
- 00:47:20,416 --> 00:47:22,117
- to pick her up from school
- before it closed.
- 792
- 00:47:22,151 --> 00:47:23,452
- She waited two hours.
- 793
- 00:47:23,485 --> 00:47:24,553
- Anything could
- have happened to her.
- 794
- 00:47:24,587 --> 00:47:26,288
- Why didn't she call somebody?
- 795
- 00:47:26,321 --> 00:47:29,224
- She fucking did call someone,
- she called you!
- 796
- 00:47:29,258 --> 00:47:30,593
- Check your damn messages.
- 797
- 00:47:30,627 --> 00:47:32,294
- I'm never going to
- forget this one.
- 798
- 00:47:32,327 --> 00:47:34,463
- Veronica, I get it.
- 799
- 00:47:34,496 --> 00:47:36,165
- I said I was sorry.
- 800
- 00:47:36,198 --> 00:47:37,299
- But you're making this
- 801
- 00:47:37,332 --> 00:47:38,635
- something worse that it is.
- 802
- 00:47:38,668 --> 00:47:40,402
- The school wouldn't have
- left her there,
- 803
- 00:47:40,436 --> 00:47:42,171
- - they know shit happens...
- - Are you seriously
- 804
- 00:47:42,204 --> 00:47:44,106
- rationalizing your behavior?
- 805
- 00:47:44,139 --> 00:47:45,574
- You're selfish and delusional.
- 806
- 00:47:45,608 --> 00:47:47,744
- I get that you're upset,
- but your coming at me
- 807
- 00:47:47,777 --> 00:47:50,078
- loaded for a bear
- with your barrage of insults
- 808
- 00:47:50,112 --> 00:47:52,014
- - isn't going to...
- - You want to hear a barrage of insults?
- 809
- 00:47:52,047 --> 00:47:54,016
- Ali, look, I know you've
- been through a shit load,
- 810
- 00:47:54,049 --> 00:47:56,051
- but the drama
- and the drugs are getting stale.
- 811
- 00:47:56,084 --> 00:47:58,187
- You're acting like some
- rebelling self-centered teenager.
- 812
- 00:47:58,220 --> 00:48:00,389
- And you're acting
- like a hysterical bitch!
- 813
- 00:48:01,356 --> 00:48:02,592
- I don't want to be around you.
- 814
- 00:48:02,625 --> 00:48:04,526
- Are you serious?
- 815
- 00:48:04,560 --> 00:48:06,328
- After everything
- I've done for you.
- 816
- 00:48:06,361 --> 00:48:08,330
- And now to see how
- insignificant I am to you.
- 817
- 00:48:08,363 --> 00:48:11,467
- How unimportant your
- goddaughter has become to you.
- 818
- 00:48:11,500 --> 00:48:13,035
- Why don't you
- and your Russian model
- 819
- 00:48:13,068 --> 00:48:14,269
- just crash and burn without me?
- 820
- 00:48:14,303 --> 00:48:16,371
- Ugh, you are being so extra.
- 821
- 00:48:16,405 --> 00:48:18,006
- You wouldn't understand,
- 822
- 00:48:18,040 --> 00:48:19,174
- you don't have children.
- 823
- 00:48:52,441 --> 00:48:53,743
- You idiot.
- 824
- 00:49:08,257 --> 00:49:10,359
- Detective, you scared
- the bejesus out of me.
- 825
- 00:49:10,392 --> 00:49:12,094
- Sorry, what happened
- to your neck?
- 826
- 00:49:12,127 --> 00:49:14,096
- Ugh, hard to explain.
- 827
- 00:49:14,864 --> 00:49:16,666
- You came to the station
- for the ring.
- 828
- 00:49:16,699 --> 00:49:18,735
- I thought if I had you bring it
- to me, it would be weird,
- 829
- 00:49:18,768 --> 00:49:20,135
- like you were proposing to me.
- 830
- 00:49:20,837 --> 00:49:21,738
- Yeah.
- 831
- 00:49:23,238 --> 00:49:24,506
- I figure I'll sell the ring.
- 832
- 00:49:24,540 --> 00:49:26,709
- Make sense. Dollars and sense.
- 833
- 00:49:28,443 --> 00:49:32,314
- - Anyways, uh, thanks for the extra effort.
- - Can I call you, Ali?
- 834
- 00:49:32,347 --> 00:49:33,850
- That is my name.
- 835
- 00:49:33,883 --> 00:49:35,117
- On the phone.
- 836
- 00:49:35,150 --> 00:49:36,518
- Ugh, no.
- 837
- 00:49:38,788 --> 00:49:40,690
- I mean, all right already.
- 838
- 00:49:40,723 --> 00:49:42,257
- You can come by Friday at eight
- 839
- 00:49:42,291 --> 00:49:44,526
- and try not to dress
- like a detective.
- 840
- 00:49:44,560 --> 00:49:46,261
- I'll come undercover.
- 841
- 00:49:46,295 --> 00:49:49,131
- Or you'll cum under my covers.
- 842
- 00:49:49,164 --> 00:49:50,700
- Oh, Ali, Jesus.
- 843
- 00:49:50,733 --> 00:49:52,835
- Sometimes I have
- diarrhea of the mouth.
- 844
- 00:49:52,869 --> 00:49:55,170
- Sometimes I have
- constipation of the brain,
- 845
- 00:49:55,203 --> 00:49:57,272
- so, makes for a good couple.
- 846
- 00:49:57,306 --> 00:49:59,341
- I'll, I'll see you Friday,
- feel better.
- 847
- 00:50:17,860 --> 00:50:21,296
- Hey, don't I know you from...
- 848
- 00:50:21,330 --> 00:50:23,532
- well, I like to call
- him Mr. Nice Guy.
- 849
- 00:50:23,565 --> 00:50:24,667
- That he is.
- 850
- 00:50:25,567 --> 00:50:26,869
- Looks painful.
- 851
- 00:50:26,903 --> 00:50:29,271
- Oh, long story.
- 852
- 00:50:29,304 --> 00:50:30,272
- Have a seat.
- 853
- 00:50:35,344 --> 00:50:37,446
- - I'm sorry.
- - For?
- 854
- 00:50:37,479 --> 00:50:38,615
- For bolting like that.
- 855
- 00:50:38,648 --> 00:50:39,849
- Only you left in such a rush
- 856
- 00:50:39,882 --> 00:50:41,550
- you forgot your bag of weed.
- 857
- 00:50:41,584 --> 00:50:42,819
- I finished it.
- 858
- 00:50:42,852 --> 00:50:44,486
- Finders keepers.
- 859
- 00:50:44,519 --> 00:50:47,422
- Jazmine, it has
- nothing to do with you.
- 860
- 00:50:47,456 --> 00:50:49,726
- I have kids at my school
- who are gender fluid
- 861
- 00:50:49,759 --> 00:50:52,260
- and every other combination.
- 862
- 00:50:52,294 --> 00:50:54,196
- It was just that I,
- 863
- 00:50:54,229 --> 00:50:56,331
- I realized that I didn't want
- to share my man with anybody.
- 864
- 00:50:57,332 --> 00:50:58,333
- It's just not who I am.
- 865
- 00:50:59,368 --> 00:51:00,903
- But you're beautiful, Jazmine,
- 866
- 00:51:00,937 --> 00:51:04,439
- and I love how you're
- so comfortable with who you are.
- 867
- 00:51:04,473 --> 00:51:06,743
- I wish there was somebody
- as amazing as you are
- 868
- 00:51:06,776 --> 00:51:08,711
- when I was back in high school.
- 869
- 00:51:08,745 --> 00:51:10,479
- It would have saved me
- a lot of shame, my...
- 870
- 00:51:11,446 --> 00:51:15,183
- my dad, he was okay with it all,
- but my mom... Jesus.
- 871
- 00:51:15,985 --> 00:51:17,687
- When was the last time
- you talked to her?
- 872
- 00:51:18,588 --> 00:51:19,956
- It's been a while.
- 873
- 00:51:19,989 --> 00:51:23,258
- I call mine, leave messages.
- 874
- 00:51:23,291 --> 00:51:25,494
- I get to hear her voice,
- even though it's just
- 875
- 00:51:25,527 --> 00:51:27,562
- a recording
- that will expire soon.
- 876
- 00:51:28,497 --> 00:51:30,667
- How long has it been
- since she passed away?
- 877
- 00:51:30,700 --> 00:51:31,668
- Nine months.
- 878
- 00:51:32,969 --> 00:51:35,672
- She's getting your message
- in some kind of way.
- 879
- 00:51:35,705 --> 00:51:36,706
- I miss her.
- 880
- 00:51:36,739 --> 00:51:38,340
- Oh, I'm so sorry, sweetie.
- 881
- 00:51:42,244 --> 00:51:44,212
- Oh, my gosh, I got to go, hun.
- 882
- 00:51:44,246 --> 00:51:47,917
- I can't be late for
- my laser lady at Luscious Legs.
- 883
- 00:51:47,950 --> 00:51:49,752
- Try saying that four times fast.
- 884
- 00:51:51,319 --> 00:51:52,822
- Take care of yourself,
- 885
- 00:51:52,855 --> 00:51:56,291
- uh, and if you see Nice Guy,
- tell him I say, hey.
- 886
- 00:51:56,324 --> 00:51:58,695
- And no hard feelings, seriously.
- 887
- 00:51:58,728 --> 00:51:59,962
- Will do.
- 888
- 00:52:03,465 --> 00:52:04,466
- Take care, okay.
- 889
- 00:52:14,509 --> 00:52:16,244
- Those are
- from the Ebigee Tribe.
- 890
- 00:52:16,278 --> 00:52:18,413
- I got those when
- I was traveling in Nigeria.
- 891
- 00:52:18,447 --> 00:52:20,315
- It was a crazy trip.
- 892
- 00:52:20,348 --> 00:52:21,851
- Do you, do you like to travel?
- 893
- 00:52:21,884 --> 00:52:25,353
- Um, I don't get out much.
- 894
- 00:52:26,956 --> 00:52:28,858
- Um, who is that?
- 895
- 00:52:28,891 --> 00:52:31,359
- Oh, yeah, that's my father.
- 896
- 00:52:31,393 --> 00:52:32,929
- He is so serious.
- 897
- 00:52:32,962 --> 00:52:35,397
- He was a painter, composer.
- 898
- 00:52:35,430 --> 00:52:37,867
- Needless to say I didn't
- really take after him.
- 899
- 00:52:37,900 --> 00:52:40,268
- But I love art,
- and the symphony.
- 900
- 00:52:40,302 --> 00:52:44,774
- Oh, he, um, was right in the
- middle of this when he passed away.
- 901
- 00:52:44,807 --> 00:52:47,375
- He always said:
- "Art is a race against death."
- 902
- 00:52:48,543 --> 00:52:49,444
- Um.
- 903
- 00:52:50,378 --> 00:52:52,815
- Looks like he lost
- the race right there.
- 904
- 00:52:56,586 --> 00:52:59,055
- - Okay, you ready?
- - Uh, maybe.
- 905
- 00:53:01,356 --> 00:53:03,492
- Which would you choose,
- 906
- 00:53:03,525 --> 00:53:05,360
- be alone for the rest
- of your life,
- 907
- 00:53:05,393 --> 00:53:07,930
- or surrounded
- by annoying people?
- 908
- 00:53:07,964 --> 00:53:10,700
- I am surrounded
- by annoying people.
- 909
- 00:53:10,733 --> 00:53:13,468
- - Present company excepted.
- - Thank you.
- 910
- 00:53:13,502 --> 00:53:14,904
- And I am alone.
- 911
- 00:53:14,937 --> 00:53:16,471
- Present company excepted.
- 912
- 00:53:18,074 --> 00:53:19,574
- My turn.
- 913
- 00:53:19,609 --> 00:53:21,010
- Which would you choose...
- 914
- 00:53:22,344 --> 00:53:24,513
- to smoke 50 cigarettes in a row
- 915
- 00:53:24,546 --> 00:53:27,449
- or drink 12 beers in a row?
- 916
- 00:53:27,482 --> 00:53:31,353
- That's going to be tough, because
- I've never had a cigarette or a beer.
- 917
- 00:53:31,386 --> 00:53:32,088
- Shut up.
- 918
- 00:53:32,121 --> 00:53:34,523
- No beer, no pot.
- 919
- 00:53:34,556 --> 00:53:36,859
- Never had a cup
- of coffee, an aspirin.
- 920
- 00:53:36,893 --> 00:53:38,795
- And I've never missed
- a morning run.
- 921
- 00:53:38,828 --> 00:53:41,798
- - Um, Clean Marine.
- - Yeah.
- 922
- 00:53:41,831 --> 00:53:44,033
- I bet my wine
- was a big fail then.
- 923
- 00:53:44,066 --> 00:53:46,903
- Uh, no, it's just,
- 924
- 00:53:46,936 --> 00:53:49,639
- see, my mom was addicted
- to all of them.
- 925
- 00:53:49,672 --> 00:53:51,941
- So I swore to myself I'd never
- let anything control me.
- 926
- 00:53:54,677 --> 00:53:57,013
- Okay, um, next.
- 927
- 00:53:58,848 --> 00:54:00,716
- Which would you choose,
- 928
- 00:54:00,750 --> 00:54:02,585
- have your best friend
- catch you lying
- 929
- 00:54:02,618 --> 00:54:04,720
- or lie to your best friend?
- 930
- 00:54:04,754 --> 00:54:06,454
- Um.
- 931
- 00:54:06,488 --> 00:54:07,957
- I'd hate to be caught lying, so,
- 932
- 00:54:07,990 --> 00:54:10,092
- assuming that is the worst.
- 933
- 00:54:10,126 --> 00:54:11,594
- I've never lied
- to my best friend,
- 934
- 00:54:11,627 --> 00:54:13,129
- but I have lied for her.
- 935
- 00:54:13,162 --> 00:54:14,462
- I sense a story coming on.
- 936
- 00:54:14,496 --> 00:54:15,798
- No, no, I mean,
- 937
- 00:54:15,832 --> 00:54:17,499
- I haven't told anybody about it,
- 938
- 00:54:17,532 --> 00:54:19,135
- except my best friend,
- because she was there.
- 939
- 00:54:19,168 --> 00:54:20,502
- But top secret.
- 940
- 00:54:20,535 --> 00:54:21,804
- It's okay.
- 941
- 00:54:21,838 --> 00:54:23,105
- All good,
- you don't have to tell me.
- 942
- 00:54:24,173 --> 00:54:27,844
- I mean, I opened up
- about my mom and everything.
- 943
- 00:54:27,877 --> 00:54:30,378
- - It's okay, I mean, it's okay.
- - Fine, I'll tell you.
- 944
- 00:54:30,412 --> 00:54:31,914
- - Okay.
- - Don't say anything.
- 945
- 00:54:32,949 --> 00:54:35,585
- I was hanging out by the pool
- with my best friend
- 946
- 00:54:35,618 --> 00:54:38,621
- and her daughter Chloe,
- we're just chilling.
- 947
- 00:54:38,654 --> 00:54:40,857
- And I went inside
- to use the bathroom
- 948
- 00:54:40,890 --> 00:54:44,126
- and when I came out,
- my best friend was asleep
- 949
- 00:54:44,160 --> 00:54:47,930
- and her daughter was
- face down in the pool.
- 950
- 00:54:48,931 --> 00:54:51,133
- I had to do mouth
- to mouth and everything,
- 951
- 00:54:51,167 --> 00:54:52,467
- it was really bad.
- 952
- 00:54:52,500 --> 00:54:53,836
- And how is the kid?
- 953
- 00:54:53,870 --> 00:54:55,905
- She's good,
- but it was a close call.
- 954
- 00:54:55,938 --> 00:54:58,040
- - You did good.
- - Thank you.
- 955
- 00:54:58,074 --> 00:55:00,142
- But then, her husband came home
- 956
- 00:55:00,176 --> 00:55:02,011
- and their marriage
- was already on the rocks,
- 957
- 00:55:02,044 --> 00:55:04,080
- and I knew if he found out
- he would hold it against her,
- 958
- 00:55:04,113 --> 00:55:07,449
- so I lied to him
- and said that I fell asleep
- 959
- 00:55:07,482 --> 00:55:10,552
- and that she saved her kid.
- 960
- 00:55:10,586 --> 00:55:13,555
- You took the fall,
- I mean, that's a good friend.
- 961
- 00:55:13,589 --> 00:55:15,958
- Thanks, I love her.
- 962
- 00:55:15,992 --> 00:55:18,961
- Can I ask you, do you ever
- want to have children?
- 963
- 00:55:18,995 --> 00:55:21,163
- I, I can't.
- 964
- 00:55:21,197 --> 00:55:24,100
- Thank you,
- Mayer-Rokitansky-Kuster-Hauser Syndrome.
- 965
- 00:55:28,704 --> 00:55:31,473
- Um, if you want to have some
- wine, it's fine with me. I'm...
- 966
- 00:55:31,506 --> 00:55:33,209
- - It's okay, it's fine. It's okay.
- - No, no, no.
- 967
- 00:55:33,242 --> 00:55:34,944
- If you can go
- your whole life without it,
- 968
- 00:55:34,977 --> 00:55:37,046
- I don't need to have
- a glass of wine.
- 969
- 00:55:37,079 --> 00:55:38,614
- I'm curious about something.
- 970
- 00:55:40,016 --> 00:55:42,184
- You know what
- that did to the cat.
- 971
- 00:55:43,753 --> 00:55:45,621
- From what I've seen,
- your choice in suitors
- 972
- 00:55:45,655 --> 00:55:47,657
- is not to be relied on.
- 973
- 00:55:49,491 --> 00:55:50,425
- Why is that?
- 974
- 00:55:54,096 --> 00:55:56,799
- As Princess Leia said
- in the garbage compactor scene,
- 975
- 00:55:56,832 --> 00:55:57,833
- "It's not over yet."
- 976
- 00:55:57,867 --> 00:55:59,936
- Oh, that's good,
- 977
- 00:55:59,969 --> 00:56:01,871
- because I can be relied on.
- 978
- 00:56:06,108 --> 00:56:08,443
- - No crap, Kojak?
- - No, no crap.
- 979
- 00:56:19,956 --> 00:56:21,657
- I never thought I would actually
- 980
- 00:56:21,691 --> 00:56:24,160
- get to say this literally,
- 981
- 00:56:24,193 --> 00:56:26,696
- but is there a gun
- in your pocket
- 982
- 00:56:26,729 --> 00:56:28,698
- or are you just happy with me?
- 983
- 00:56:28,731 --> 00:56:29,832
- Which would you choose?
- 984
- 00:56:37,707 --> 00:56:38,607
- Ali?
- 985
- 00:56:39,608 --> 00:56:41,043
- I never sleep with a woman
- on the first date.
- 986
- 00:56:42,278 --> 00:56:44,512
- I'm really hoping
- there is going to be a second.
- 987
- 00:56:47,083 --> 00:56:48,851
- You really do have self-control.
- 988
- 00:56:55,557 --> 00:56:56,926
- Yeah, dude,
- check it out,
- 989
- 00:56:56,959 --> 00:56:58,661
- this is what she was
- like for my appointment.
- 990
- 00:56:59,962 --> 00:57:02,231
- Oh, out for the count.
- 991
- 00:57:10,106 --> 00:57:12,041
- Someone linked it up
- to the school home page.
- 992
- 00:57:17,213 --> 00:57:18,114
- No comment?
- 993
- 00:57:19,982 --> 00:57:21,183
- Maybe I did hire you too young.
- 994
- 00:57:21,217 --> 00:57:23,019
- I'm processing.
- 995
- 00:57:24,920 --> 00:57:26,822
- Look, we both know
- nothing happens on this campus
- 996
- 00:57:26,856 --> 00:57:28,591
- without me being aware of it.
- 997
- 00:57:28,624 --> 00:57:30,659
- This is what I do,
- I'm here, I'm present.
- 998
- 00:57:30,693 --> 00:57:31,827
- 25 years sober.
- 999
- 00:57:33,262 --> 00:57:34,797
- And here is the rub.
- 1000
- 00:57:34,830 --> 00:57:36,564
- It's out of my hands now.
- 1001
- 00:57:36,599 --> 00:57:38,267
- Now that everybody's seen it,
- 1002
- 00:57:38,300 --> 00:57:39,969
- I'm going to have to explain it
- to the school board
- 1003
- 00:57:40,002 --> 00:57:41,569
- and to Supervisor Gibbs.
- 1004
- 00:57:44,974 --> 00:57:47,243
- You know it's guilty until proven
- innocent with that bunch of piranhas.
- 1005
- 00:57:47,276 --> 00:57:50,780
- - Am I on trial for napping?
- - No.
- 1006
- 00:57:50,813 --> 00:57:52,948
- But you will be
- for taking this too lightly.
- 1007
- 00:57:52,982 --> 00:57:54,817
- How in the hell did
- you get yourself caught up
- 1008
- 00:57:54,850 --> 00:57:56,852
- in such an awkward
- situation in the first place?
- 1009
- 00:57:56,886 --> 00:57:59,088
- I fell asleep in my office.
- 1010
- 00:57:59,121 --> 00:58:02,091
- I was in a lot of pain,
- and I needed a quick cat nap.
- 1011
- 00:58:02,124 --> 00:58:05,661
- And you didn't notice somebody
- filming you from head to toe?
- 1012
- 00:58:05,694 --> 00:58:07,029
- That is not some kind
- of safe napping.
- 1013
- 00:58:08,097 --> 00:58:09,598
- And what happened to your neck?
- 1014
- 00:58:09,632 --> 00:58:11,067
- I don't feel that is pertinent.
- 1015
- 00:58:11,100 --> 00:58:12,668
- Incorrect!
- 1016
- 00:58:12,701 --> 00:58:14,103
- If you're under medication
- while on the job,
- 1017
- 00:58:14,136 --> 00:58:15,704
- you must log in with the nurse,
- 1018
- 00:58:15,738 --> 00:58:17,206
- along with the doctor's
- prescription.
- 1019
- 00:58:17,239 --> 00:58:18,974
- And that is pertinent.
- 1020
- 00:58:19,008 --> 00:58:20,810
- Do you realize the legalities
- I have to go through
- 1021
- 00:58:20,843 --> 00:58:22,144
- on a daily basis
- with the parents here?
- 1022
- 00:58:37,760 --> 00:58:38,994
- Principal Davis?
- 1023
- 00:58:41,330 --> 00:58:43,599
- Once you've seen
- somebody run over by a bus...
- 1024
- 00:58:44,667 --> 00:58:46,869
- it's hard to figure out what to
- do with the rest of your day.
- 1025
- 00:58:46,902 --> 00:58:48,304
- My God, you did?
- 1026
- 00:58:51,941 --> 00:58:54,677
- I saw her on the sidewalk
- with her walker.
- 1027
- 00:58:56,378 --> 00:58:58,681
- I guess the bus driver didn't.
- 1028
- 00:58:58,714 --> 00:58:59,715
- And just like that,
- 1029
- 00:59:00,416 --> 00:59:01,350
- game over.
- 1030
- 00:59:02,685 --> 00:59:05,321
- I think you should go home,
- 1031
- 00:59:05,354 --> 00:59:08,357
- I think you're
- in a mild state of shock.
- 1032
- 00:59:08,390 --> 00:59:09,892
- I got to shake this off.
- 1033
- 00:59:10,926 --> 00:59:12,294
- Do the best I can for my kids.
- 1034
- 00:59:14,130 --> 00:59:17,433
- Well, I assure you
- this will not happen again.
- 1035
- 00:59:17,466 --> 00:59:19,034
- See that old lady
- run over by a bus?
- 1036
- 00:59:19,068 --> 00:59:20,302
- My situation.
- 1037
- 00:59:20,336 --> 00:59:21,937
- I, I promise, Principal Davis,
- 1038
- 00:59:21,971 --> 00:59:23,906
- I, I will make sure to log
- 1039
- 00:59:23,939 --> 00:59:26,108
- all medication in
- with the nurse.
- 1040
- 00:59:27,776 --> 00:59:30,179
- Maybe it's time
- you took inventory,
- 1041
- 00:59:30,212 --> 00:59:32,314
- and figure out your part
- in this fiasco.
- 1042
- 00:59:34,150 --> 00:59:35,851
- Meaning what?
- 1043
- 00:59:37,353 --> 00:59:39,088
- Meaning that, if you got
- kittens in the oven,
- 1044
- 00:59:39,121 --> 00:59:40,055
- you don't call them muffins.
- 1045
- 00:59:44,126 --> 00:59:47,930
- If it's not dark chocolate,
- there's no point.
- 1046
- 00:59:47,963 --> 00:59:49,398
- What?
- 1047
- 00:59:49,431 --> 00:59:52,401
- I finally found
- my Clean Marine's "oholic,"
- 1048
- 00:59:52,434 --> 00:59:54,470
- as in chocoholic.
- 1049
- 00:59:54,503 --> 00:59:58,040
- Buyer beware, life won't
- be worth living in 2021.
- 1050
- 00:59:58,073 --> 00:59:59,742
- Oh, why is that?
- 1051
- 00:59:59,775 --> 01:00:01,143
- It's when the world's supply
- 1052
- 01:00:01,177 --> 01:00:03,345
- of sustainable cocoa
- will be devastated.
- 1053
- 01:00:03,379 --> 01:00:05,748
- There will be a global
- chocolate drought.
- 1054
- 01:00:05,781 --> 01:00:07,349
- Um, the clock is ticking.
- 1055
- 01:00:10,186 --> 01:00:11,787
- You got to get it while you can.
- 1056
- 01:00:26,869 --> 01:00:28,704
- - Chocolatey.
- - Very.
- 1057
- 01:00:38,380 --> 01:00:40,149
- - Can I use your bathroom?
- - Oh.
- 1058
- 01:00:42,251 --> 01:00:44,420
- I don't know, can you?
- 1059
- 01:00:44,453 --> 01:00:47,056
- I hated when my teacher
- would say that to me.
- 1060
- 01:00:47,089 --> 01:00:49,491
- - Right. It's so evil.
- - Yeah. The worst.
- 1061
- 01:00:50,826 --> 01:00:52,161
- - It's just down the hall.
- - Okay.
- 1062
- 01:01:21,523 --> 01:01:22,424
- Ali.
- 1063
- 01:01:23,593 --> 01:01:24,793
- Is everything okay?
- 1064
- 01:01:24,827 --> 01:01:25,794
- Um.
- 1065
- 01:01:29,565 --> 01:01:31,867
- Okay, whatever you have
- to say, just say it.
- 1066
- 01:01:31,900 --> 01:01:33,869
- Okay, um.
- 1067
- 01:01:36,171 --> 01:01:38,107
- Ali, what we've started
- can't last.
- 1068
- 01:01:38,140 --> 01:01:40,075
- Your world is just too crazy,
- 1069
- 01:01:40,109 --> 01:01:42,811
- and if there's one thing I've
- learned from my past marriages...
- 1070
- 01:01:42,845 --> 01:01:45,414
- Marriages? You didn't
- tell me there were two.
- 1071
- 01:01:45,447 --> 01:01:47,249
- - Or more?
- - One thing I've learned
- 1072
- 01:01:47,283 --> 01:01:49,285
- is I have to stop
- trying to rescue women.
- 1073
- 01:01:51,153 --> 01:01:54,156
- So that's your conclusion
- based on your snooping?
- 1074
- 01:01:54,189 --> 01:01:57,226
- You have a bottle of Oxy in
- someone else's name, Adderall...
- 1075
- 01:01:57,259 --> 01:01:59,161
- You know, I don't appreciate
- people going through my shit.
- 1076
- 01:01:59,194 --> 01:02:00,496
- Well then, if you
- have nothing to hide...
- 1077
- 01:02:00,529 --> 01:02:01,830
- You know, you're
- the biggest fucking
- 1078
- 01:02:01,864 --> 01:02:03,198
- control freak in the world.
- 1079
- 01:02:03,232 --> 01:02:04,433
- I'm done trying
- to catch a falling knife.
- 1080
- 01:02:04,466 --> 01:02:06,068
- Well, I don't need rescuing.
- 1081
- 01:02:06,101 --> 01:02:07,870
- Good, because I'm not
- a lifeguard anymore.
- 1082
- 01:02:07,903 --> 01:02:09,471
- No, you're just a fucking guy
- 1083
- 01:02:09,505 --> 01:02:11,807
- with a badge
- and a stick up his ass.
- 1084
- 01:02:14,877 --> 01:02:16,178
- The door is
- right over there, Ali.
- 1085
- 01:02:17,580 --> 01:02:19,281
- Don't forget your Oxy.
- 1086
- 01:02:21,651 --> 01:02:23,218
- I had a fucking neck injury.
- 1087
- 01:02:27,990 --> 01:02:28,957
- Fuck you.
- 1088
- 01:02:29,958 --> 01:02:31,327
- Mature.
- 1089
- 01:03:28,050 --> 01:03:29,652
- In the last month,
- 1090
- 01:03:29,686 --> 01:03:32,020
- we've had formal complaints
- from Dylan and his parents
- 1091
- 01:03:32,054 --> 01:03:35,592
- and Lily and her parents about your
- poor judgment, inappropriate behavior,
- 1092
- 01:03:35,625 --> 01:03:37,660
- and unethical choices.
- 1093
- 01:03:37,694 --> 01:03:41,096
- Dylan, can you share with us
- what Miss Silver said to you?
- 1094
- 01:03:41,130 --> 01:03:43,031
- She told me that
- all the other students
- 1095
- 01:03:43,065 --> 01:03:44,400
- were calling anything small...
- 1096
- 01:03:45,367 --> 01:03:46,703
- a Dylan dick.
- 1097
- 01:03:46,736 --> 01:03:48,437
- They weren't, she was just
- 1098
- 01:03:48,470 --> 01:03:49,972
- trying to freak me out.
- 1099
- 01:03:50,005 --> 01:03:51,173
- Lily, would you mind telling us
- 1100
- 01:03:51,206 --> 01:03:52,474
- what made you feel uncomfortable
- 1101
- 01:03:52,508 --> 01:03:53,942
- about your sessions
- with Miss Silver?
- 1102
- 01:03:55,077 --> 01:03:56,178
- She was just...
- 1103
- 01:03:57,580 --> 01:03:59,148
- I'm pretty sure she hates men.
- 1104
- 01:03:59,181 --> 01:04:00,583
- Lily, why are you doing this?
- 1105
- 01:04:00,617 --> 01:04:02,918
- We're the ones
- asking the questions here.
- 1106
- 01:04:03,653 --> 01:04:04,621
- You two may go now.
- 1107
- 01:04:05,789 --> 01:04:09,558
- You have also been caught
- on video sleeping seductively.
- 1108
- 01:04:09,592 --> 01:04:11,293
- Seductively?
- 1109
- 01:04:11,326 --> 01:04:13,028
- Are you joking?
- 1110
- 01:04:13,061 --> 01:04:14,563
- I, I don't know
- who took that video,
- 1111
- 01:04:14,597 --> 01:04:16,532
- but, um, I felt violated.
- 1112
- 01:04:16,565 --> 01:04:19,034
- You also have admitted
- on being on a medication
- 1113
- 01:04:19,067 --> 01:04:21,370
- without informing
- the school nurse as required.
- 1114
- 01:04:21,403 --> 01:04:23,572
- And now, we have
- a star athlete parent's
- 1115
- 01:04:23,606 --> 01:04:25,541
- - threatening to sue the school.
- - Hmm.
- 1116
- 01:04:26,442 --> 01:04:28,343
- Due to
- your erratic behavior,
- 1117
- 01:04:28,377 --> 01:04:30,245
- I'm asking that you take
- a drug test immediately.
- 1118
- 01:04:31,180 --> 01:04:34,183
- And if you fail to do so,
- I must ask for your resignation.
- 1119
- 01:04:34,216 --> 01:04:36,218
- And if you do not
- want to comply with this,
- 1120
- 01:04:36,251 --> 01:04:39,021
- I will terminate your work here,
- effective immediately.
- 1121
- 01:04:43,726 --> 01:04:45,728
- Well, I guess I was wrong.
- 1122
- 01:04:48,665 --> 01:04:51,033
- You did get to see another
- woman get run over again.
- 1123
- 01:05:16,124 --> 01:05:17,025
- Stop it.
- 1124
- 01:05:18,728 --> 01:05:19,762
- Stop it!
- 1125
- 01:05:25,133 --> 01:05:26,168
- Fuck off!
- 1126
- 01:05:44,520 --> 01:05:45,688
- Tell me, baby.
- 1127
- 01:05:48,791 --> 01:05:50,760
- I was fired.
- 1128
- 01:05:50,793 --> 01:05:51,761
- Oh.
- 1129
- 01:05:53,128 --> 01:05:54,329
- What can I do to help?
- 1130
- 01:05:57,266 --> 01:05:58,668
- Take me away.
- 1131
- 01:05:58,701 --> 01:06:00,135
- Far, far away.
- 1132
- 01:06:02,639 --> 01:06:04,239
- I thought you might say that.
- 1133
- 01:06:06,809 --> 01:06:08,477
- What am I, in kindergarten?
- 1134
- 01:06:09,846 --> 01:06:11,079
- Just wait.
- 1135
- 01:06:22,859 --> 01:06:24,226
- How do you feel?
- 1136
- 01:06:27,630 --> 01:06:32,501
- Like I'm swimming in a pool
- of warm marshmallows.
- 1137
- 01:06:35,304 --> 01:06:36,806
- That's fent, all right.
- 1138
- 01:06:39,809 --> 01:06:41,611
- Close your eyes, my beauty.
- 1139
- 01:07:11,674 --> 01:07:13,475
- Have you ever kissed Veronica?
- 1140
- 01:07:15,177 --> 01:07:17,212
- I've never kissed any girl.
- 1141
- 01:07:35,364 --> 01:07:37,265
- Ali? Ali!
- 1142
- 01:07:39,869 --> 01:07:41,671
- Wake up, wake up.
- 1143
- 01:07:43,873 --> 01:07:45,608
- Ali, wake up.
- 1144
- 01:07:50,445 --> 01:07:52,649
- Hi,
- you've reached Eva Silver.
- 1145
- 01:07:52,682 --> 01:07:54,684
- Tip for the day:
- write the bad things
- 1146
- 01:07:54,717 --> 01:07:56,518
- that happen to you in sand,
- 1147
- 01:07:56,551 --> 01:07:58,520
- carve the good things
- that happen to you
- 1148
- 01:07:58,553 --> 01:08:00,355
- on a slab of marble,
- 1149
- 01:08:00,389 --> 01:08:03,291
- and leave a message at the beep.
- 1150
- 01:08:03,325 --> 01:08:06,461
- The mailbox is full and cannot accept
- 1151
- 01:08:06,495 --> 01:08:08,463
- any messages at this time.
- Goodbye.
- 1152
- 01:08:11,701 --> 01:08:12,635
- Mommy.
- 1153
- 01:08:15,470 --> 01:08:17,506
- I must be such
- a disappointment to you.
- 1154
- 01:08:18,741 --> 01:08:20,943
- This is not what
- you'd want for me.
- 1155
- 01:08:26,783 --> 01:08:29,551
- I wish I could hear you tell me
- that one day I'll get it right.
- 1156
- 01:08:33,455 --> 01:08:35,457
- That this is just
- the end of what you taught me
- 1157
- 01:08:35,490 --> 01:08:37,827
- was an annus horribilis,
- 1158
- 01:08:37,860 --> 01:08:41,430
- a horrible year,
- written in sand.
- 1159
- 01:09:09,892 --> 01:09:10,893
- Love yourself.
- 1160
- 01:09:42,491 --> 01:09:44,727
- It's like
- this thing I was told,
- 1161
- 01:09:44,761 --> 01:09:47,462
- it's in total blackness
- that you can see the light.
- 1162
- 01:09:47,496 --> 01:09:50,733
- In the tank, images
- and memories flow in and out,
- 1163
- 01:09:50,767 --> 01:09:52,702
- and it gave me
- a safe place to process
- 1164
- 01:09:52,735 --> 01:09:55,071
- and to get honest with myself.
- 1165
- 01:09:55,104 --> 01:09:57,405
- Move through
- the ridiculousness of it all.
- 1166
- 01:09:57,439 --> 01:09:59,474
- I didn't know what
- you'd been going through.
- 1167
- 01:09:59,508 --> 01:10:00,910
- As in fired from my job,
- 1168
- 01:10:00,943 --> 01:10:03,411
- not living an authentic
- grown-up life,
- 1169
- 01:10:03,445 --> 01:10:06,816
- my first and last ride
- in the back of an ambulance.
- 1170
- 01:10:07,717 --> 01:10:10,019
- Wow, I'm glad you're safe.
- 1171
- 01:10:10,052 --> 01:10:12,354
- It was a real wake up call.
- 1172
- 01:10:12,387 --> 01:10:14,791
- I'm going to start back with
- the foster parenting classes.
- 1173
- 01:10:14,824 --> 01:10:16,424
- Get back to what is important.
- 1174
- 01:10:16,458 --> 01:10:18,060
- So, you're cool
- doing it on your own?
- 1175
- 01:10:19,394 --> 01:10:21,363
- Yeah, I am.
- 1176
- 01:10:21,396 --> 01:10:23,699
- But I can't be a foster parent
- until I get a job,
- 1177
- 01:10:23,733 --> 01:10:25,835
- so it's a whole process.
- 1178
- 01:10:27,502 --> 01:10:28,938
- I may be able
- to help you out with that.
- 1179
- 01:10:30,740 --> 01:10:33,475
- I know one of the board
- of directors of Promises Rehab,
- 1180
- 01:10:33,508 --> 01:10:35,011
- right here in Malibu.
- 1181
- 01:10:35,044 --> 01:10:36,879
- They're looking
- for another therapist.
- 1182
- 01:10:38,047 --> 01:10:41,083
- Past drug use isn't a detriment,
- it's a requirement.
- 1183
- 01:10:43,119 --> 01:10:44,854
- That would be incredible.
- 1184
- 01:10:45,755 --> 01:10:48,991
- So, how is your girlfriend,
- what did you say her name was?
- 1185
- 01:10:49,025 --> 01:10:50,693
- Carmen.
- 1186
- 01:10:50,726 --> 01:10:54,597
- - We're engaged.
- - Oh, I forgot, you move fast.
- 1187
- 01:10:55,631 --> 01:10:57,700
- What did you say about, uh...
- 1188
- 01:10:59,068 --> 01:11:01,369
- I told Carmen
- that I'm from Kansas,
- 1189
- 01:11:01,403 --> 01:11:03,039
- that I forage for my own food,
- 1190
- 01:11:03,072 --> 01:11:05,641
- and I like threesomes
- with women like Jazmine.
- 1191
- 01:11:05,675 --> 01:11:06,809
- And?
- 1192
- 01:11:06,843 --> 01:11:07,777
- She said:
- 1193
- 01:11:08,778 --> 01:11:11,681
- "I've never met anybody
- from Kansas before."
- 1194
- 01:11:14,917 --> 01:11:15,852
- Right?
- 1195
- 01:11:17,987 --> 01:11:21,090
- - It's good to see you.
- - Um, it's good to see you.
- 1196
- 01:11:21,123 --> 01:11:23,092
- - I'm glad you're doing well.
- - Thank you.
- 1197
- 01:11:24,594 --> 01:11:25,895
- Shit.
- 1198
- 01:11:25,928 --> 01:11:27,797
- It's supposed to be here
- somewhere.
- 1199
- 01:11:27,830 --> 01:11:29,431
- How could I get a zit at my age?
- 1200
- 01:11:29,464 --> 01:11:30,633
- I'm supposed to be
- worried about wrinkles
- 1201
- 01:11:30,666 --> 01:11:32,467
- and sun damage, not zits.
- 1202
- 01:11:32,500 --> 01:11:34,670
- Can you relax?
- You got this.
- 1203
- 01:11:34,704 --> 01:11:37,173
- That's what Nice Guy said,
- I wouldn't win this interview without him.
- 1204
- 01:11:37,206 --> 01:11:39,041
- Nice Guy has really
- been living up to his name.
- 1205
- 01:11:39,075 --> 01:11:40,910
- And I wouldn't
- be here without you.
- 1206
- 01:11:40,943 --> 01:11:43,145
- The hospital visits,
- the rest of it.
- 1207
- 01:11:43,179 --> 01:11:45,081
- I couldn't lose my best friend.
- 1208
- 01:11:45,114 --> 01:11:46,849
- Even if she was
- being a dumb ass.
- 1209
- 01:11:48,918 --> 01:11:50,186
- Just put toothpaste on it.
- 1210
- 01:11:50,219 --> 01:11:52,755
- That is blue, I need a conceal.
- 1211
- 01:11:52,788 --> 01:11:55,191
- Ugh, there is
- so much shit in here.
- 1212
- 01:11:55,224 --> 01:11:58,828
- - Dress or pants?
- - Um, wear pants, uh, the purple sweater set
- 1213
- 01:11:58,861 --> 01:12:01,797
- with the gold and porcelain
- buttons or whatever.
- 1214
- 01:12:01,831 --> 01:12:03,799
- Oh, what about
- that pink turtleneck?
- 1215
- 01:12:05,567 --> 01:12:08,403
- Or maybe a red dress or something, you don't
- want to show too much skin, never mind.
- 1216
- 01:12:09,205 --> 01:12:10,773
- - OxyContin?
- - Really?
- 1217
- 01:12:13,075 --> 01:12:14,110
- Pot?
- 1218
- 01:12:16,178 --> 01:12:17,445
- Condoms.
- 1219
- 01:12:19,715 --> 01:12:20,917
- You're a superstar.
- 1220
- 01:12:20,950 --> 01:12:22,919
- Who am I kidding
- about the condoms?
- 1221
- 01:12:24,687 --> 01:12:26,756
- You got Foster Friday's on?
- 1222
- 01:12:26,789 --> 01:12:27,890
- As always.
- 1223
- 01:12:29,258 --> 01:12:31,160
- Ah, I'm still fixing my face.
- 1224
- 01:12:31,193 --> 01:12:33,495
- I feel like I'm 13.
- 1225
- 01:12:33,528 --> 01:12:36,498
- Hey, yo, you remember
- that kid from last year, Leo?
- 1226
- 01:12:36,531 --> 01:12:38,134
- The one who tripped
- the cameraman and got
- 1227
- 01:12:38,167 --> 01:12:39,669
- paint all over
- the anchor's hair and stuff?
- 1228
- 01:12:40,803 --> 01:12:42,470
- Yeah, we loved him.
- 1229
- 01:12:42,504 --> 01:12:44,206
- Not the hair!
- 1230
- 01:12:44,240 --> 01:12:45,608
- Well, he is back.
- 1231
- 01:12:46,709 --> 01:12:48,611
- I thought he had
- his forever home.
- 1232
- 01:12:48,644 --> 01:12:50,246
- Apparently not.
- 1233
- 01:12:50,279 --> 01:12:53,582
- It's going to be tough for him,
- though, his being so old.
- 1234
- 01:12:53,616 --> 01:12:55,483
- He is special.
- 1235
- 01:12:55,517 --> 01:12:58,587
- Expressive eyes.
- Wise old soul, right?
- 1236
- 01:12:58,621 --> 01:13:00,488
- Yeah, but he's
- a handful, though.
- 1237
- 01:13:01,590 --> 01:13:03,793
- Remember last year I said it?
- 1238
- 01:13:03,826 --> 01:13:05,161
- I told you, I said this guy,
- 1239
- 01:13:05,194 --> 01:13:07,562
- this kid would be
- a good match for me.
- 1240
- 01:13:07,596 --> 01:13:08,731
- But you couldn't commit.
- 1241
- 01:13:10,967 --> 01:13:13,970
- Hold on, are we
- seriously talking about this?
- 1242
- 01:13:23,846 --> 01:13:25,948
- I'll imagine it
- carved in marble.
- 1243
- 01:13:27,216 --> 01:13:28,217
- Are you okay, Mom?
- 1244
- 01:13:29,385 --> 01:13:32,788
- Yeah, it's just the first time
- you've called me "mom."
- 1245
- 01:13:32,822 --> 01:13:34,824
- At first, I thought
- you were stuck with me
- 1246
- 01:13:34,857 --> 01:13:37,259
- being the oldest one
- at the foster home.
- 1247
- 01:13:37,293 --> 01:13:40,562
- Know this, you were
- my first and only choice,
- 1248
- 01:13:40,596 --> 01:13:43,299
- so, now you're stuck with me.
- 1249
- 01:14:32,681 --> 01:14:34,083
- Welcome back to the 'bu.
- 1250
- 01:14:34,116 --> 01:14:36,685
- Sure we lost Ali,
- one of our boldest soldiers,
- 1251
- 01:14:36,719 --> 01:14:40,623
- but don't worry, no fire,
- mudslide, earthquake,
- 1252
- 01:14:40,656 --> 01:14:43,292
- or fallen soldier is going to
- stop us from doing what we do.
- 1253
- 01:14:43,325 --> 01:14:45,594
- Mojito sipping,
- night time surfing,
- 1254
- 01:14:45,628 --> 01:14:47,029
- living it up in paradise.
- 1255
- 01:15:07,505 --> 01:15:12,505
- Subtitles by explosiveskull
- akumenang.com
Advertisement
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment
Advertisement