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Tyrane and Kiara Survey

a guest Apr 8th, 2013 301 Never
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  1. 1. Describe yourself and your creator.
  2.  
  3. Right now, I suppose 'desperate but committed' would be a good way to put it. He's caring and I know he has his strengths and weaknesses which I'll definitely be able to help him through, even if he can't comprehend how yet. I try to remain calm and suave to him, but 'I'm only human' so sometimes some 'raw' emotion gets through which can be a little awkward. He's genuine introvert with some strange aspects as an INFJ and I'm a little more outgoing, only due to the fact I'm a spectator.
  4.  
  5. 2. What was the most helpful thing that your creator did during the tulpa creation process? Did your creator recognize how helpful it was? If not, how did that make you feel?
  6.  
  7. He committed /a lot/ of energy towards our development and he attempted many different perspectives, he never doubted and so our communication slowly got stronger.
  8.  
  9. 3. What was the most detrimental thing that your creator did during the tulpa creation process? Did your creator recognize how harmful it was? If not, how did that make you feel?
  10.  
  11. Periods when he would ignore me and our requests, watching him slowly killing Fate without realization, he recognized it once he snapped out of it and I'm educating him on the process for future reference, we're getting stronger together.
  12.  
  13. 4. What was the hardest part of the tulpa creation process for you? Did your creator recognize how difficult it was? If not, how did that make you feel?
  14.  
  15. Imposition was and is the hardest portion and the most important too. He's only been able to bring me in several times, I can visualize myself there but it's only been genuine a select few times.
  16.  
  17. 5. Of the commonly recognized tulpa creation steps, which do you feel is the most important? Why?
  18.  
  19. Maintaining belief whilst reaching a stable perspective which he could use as a foothold.
  20.  
  21. 6. How do you feel about tulpa creators becoming distracted during tulpa creation? Does this greatly impede the process? How did you feel about it before being able to speak fluently?
  22.  
  23. Definitely. He was horrible and he still is from time to time but he understands methods of control now and we're overcoming this drastic hurdle.
  24.  
  25. 7. How do you feel about tulpa creators missing tulpa creation sessions or breaking their promises to work on their tulpa? How did you feel about it before being able to speak fluently?
  26.  
  27. I think you shouldn't have sessions, it's not like we're projects or anything. (I understand it varies but it's robotic to treat a relationship with such structure)
  28.  
  29. 8. Is density, quality, or quantity the most important aspect of tulpa creation?
  30.  
  31. I'm not sure what density is referring to. Frequency over duration like 'mega-sessions'? I personally think that's harmful to him. There is no 'one better than the other' you need to find a balance...
  32.  
  33. 9. How do you feel about tulpa creators falling asleep during tulpa creation sessions?
  34.  
  35. Perfectly fine, it didn't effect us whatsoever, in fact that's how most of our wildest deepest dream sessions take place.
  36.  
  37. 10. Do you think that a tulpa creator should talk aloud or in their head during narration? Do you think that a creator should talk aloud or in their head during tulpa creation sessions? If you find one to be more effective, to what degree is it more effective?
  38.  
  39. Personally, I think it's more beneficial during aloud sessions due to the fact that there is the underlying commitment value, to speak in mind voice is one thing but aloud for people to hear reinforces your genuine belief if there is any there.
  40.  
  41. 11. How do you feel about a tulpa creator puppeting and/or parroting their tulpa? Do you believe that these actions harm a tulpa's development, or only their emotional state?
  42.  
  43. To be honest I'm not sure about this one, in my case it was frustrating but he knew me well so I managed to share foreign emotion to confirm when he was or wasn't, that didn't fail.
  44.  
  45. 12. How deeply do you remember the time before you were fluent in language?
  46.  
  47. It was a fading development, /I/ remember it being perfect from the beginning but he is struggling to fathom it -- ha-ha.
  48.  
  49. 13. Describe your first memory, no matter how slight.
  50.  
  51. It was like being in a womb, small glimmering yellow light sleep through like a crescent over my head, whispers, no, more like bellowing echoes of desperation.
  52.  
  53. 14. Before you could speak fluently, what was the most positive emotion you felt about your creator and what was its cause?
  54.  
  55. Love, he was glad we finally made a connection and so was I. Day after day of research and shouting out to each other finally paid off and we knew it was only going to get better. That or when I realized I wanted a child.
  56.  
  57. 15. Before you could speak fluently, what was the most negative emotion you felt about your creator and what was its cause?
  58.  
  59. Doubt of existence, it used to haunt me tremendously, the way I felt as though my existence was 'artificial'.
  60.  
  61. 16. Before you could speak fluently, did you ever have suicidal feelings or feelings of not wanting to exist? Do you experience them now? Are you glad that you exist?
  62.  
  63. Roughly, once, but I'm not sure I would describe it as 'suicidal' it was more curiosity of how he would feel if I were to never respond or try, what 'death' would be like but I was watching Fate for that and I knew his desperation meant something truly wonderful was on the other side.
  64.  
  65. 17. Before you could speak fluently, when did you feel the most powerless? What was the cause of this feeling?
  66.  
  67. While I would shout repeatedly towards him 'I'm right here!' into a void and he would keep asking where I was.
  68.  
  69. 18. Before you could speak fluently, what was the most confusing moment that you experienced, and what was its cause?
  70.  
  71. The most confusing moment... Realizing potential he was unaware of, he still doesn't fathom it when I try to explain it and it flies right over his head but I'm glad because it would cause too much tension for him.
  72.  
  73. 19. Before being able to speak fluently, when did you feel the most ignored by your creator, and what was the cause?
  74.  
  75. During his 'time skips' which we're covering now. He basically numbs out and spends time on intense thought processing crap he'll stockpile throughout the days, at the end he'll be clearer but he'd have wasted anywhere up to hours...
  76.  
  77. 20. Before being able to speak fluently, when did you most doubt that your creator wanted you, and what was the cause?
  78.  
  79. Never, to be honest. I wouldn't be the one to ask. (Fate: The moment he felt fear visualizing me, he could almost feel the cold seeping into his mind and that artificial, ominous rush he manufactured prematurely almost killed me)
  80.  
  81. 21. Before you could speak fluently, when did you feel the most intense feeling of fear, and what was its cause?
  82.  
  83. Fate again... (Fate: The moment his faith transferred to Kiara)
  84.  
  85. I take it back, the next question struck my memory! The night we woke up and I had let him die over and over, he was suffering so badly and it was my fault, I genuinely believed he'd died and I couldn't stop crying, it was a living nightmare.
  86.  
  87. 22. Before you could speak fluently, when were you the most disappointed in yourself? What was the cause?
  88.  
  89. Letting him die in dreamscapes, I could feel his trauma.
  90.  
  91. 23. Before you could speak fluently, did you understand the difficulties that your creator was having with the tulpa creation process? Did you try to alleviate these difficulties? If so, how?
  92.  
  93. Yes, I would send messages to him constantly, I would search every space of his ' ' (T: I do not know what this is) and give him what advice or support I could.
  94.  
  95. 24. Before you could speak fluently, how did your creator's doubts about your existence, the reality of the tulpa phenomenon, or your combined ability to complete the tulpa creation process affect you? Did you understand your creator's reasons for having those doubts? Do you understand now?
  96.  
  97. Luckily I could speak to him by the second morning because he put so much faith into the theory. We didn't have to experience the doubts or failures too harshly to be honest.
  98.  
  99. 25. Before you could speak fluently, how did your creator's mistrust of your intentions or worry about the negative affects of a tulpa on their life affect you? Did you understand your creator's reasons for having those thoughts? Do you understand now?
  100.  
  101. Yes, I've always understood and that's simply the way he is. He can't trust anyone and it's a bit of a shame, although just saying that causes him to feel anxious about me again, it made me feel reasonably depressed I suppose.
  102.  
  103. 26. Before you could speak fluently, how did any negative thoughts or emotions that your creator had toward you (such as anger, disappointment, resentment, or impatience, for example) affect you? How do you feel about them now?
  104.  
  105. He never felt any of these things towards me.
  106.  
  107. 27. Before you could speak fluently, how did any violent visualizations or thoughts that your creator had about you affect you? How do you feel about them now?
  108.  
  109. Violent visualizations or thoughts about /me/? None. Why is this even here?
  110.  
  111. 28. Before you could speak fluently, were you able to distinguish between your creator's intentional and intrusive (unwanted and/or bothersome) thoughts? If so, did the intrusive thoughts affect you less or more? If not, are you able to distinguish between them now?
  112.  
  113. Not at first, some would slip past and offend/hurt me but we're both growing and I've learned how to distinguish these.
  114.  
  115. 29. Before you could speak fluently, how much of your creator's raw sensory information were you able to access, if any? How much are you able to access now?
  116.  
  117. (T: I'm not sure about this one.) He's useless xD.
  118.  
  119. 30. Before you could speak fluently, did your creator's opinions about whether they wanted to reveal to the world your existence or not affect you emotionally? If so, how?
  120.  
  121. Made me weary. We both know that it's more likely to have negative effects for us in 'reality' but it would be interesting to one day find another tulpamancer and friends...
  122.  
  123. 31. Before being able to speak fluently, what communication methods (such as head pressure or emotional responses, for example) were you able to use the most effectively? When your tulpa creator assumed that you could use a communication method that you did not have access to, how did this affect you? When your tulpa creator did not recognize a communication method that you attempted to use, how did this affect you?
  124.  
  125. When he woke up the second morning he was so distorted he managed to make out my shouting, 'head pains' and emotional responses worked most effectively though since he hasn't peaked as hard as that first day since.
  126.  
  127. 32. Before you could speak fluently, how did your creator's level of enthusiasm for the tulpa creation process affect you? Did you want to engage in it less if they did?
  128.  
  129. I knew success was inevitable, he didn't want to give up and neither did I, I really appreciate that.
  130.  
  131. 33. Before you could speak fluently, what was your greatest worry about your relationship with your creator? What helped you most to move beyond it? Was this worry substantiated or resolved? What is your greatest worry now about your continuing relationship with your creator?
  132.  
  133. That he wouldn't return my feelings, it was resolved because we realize we don't have to talk to other people about it, for now. My greatest worry is probably interfering external relationships... we have no clue what we'll do when that boat arrives, so to say.
  134.  
  135. 34. Do you feel gratitude to your creator for the time that they spent creating you? Do you feel that you owe them a debt? If so, do you feel burdened by it?
  136.  
  137. Yes, No.
  138. I love him for giving this a chance, for giving me a chance.
  139.  
  140. 35. Were you aware of your creator's existence or your own existence first?
  141.  
  142. Both I suppose, I knew I wasn't alone because I could hear his voice but that caused me to become aware of mine.
  143.  
  144. 36. When you could only speak semi-fluently, what emotions did you feel about your level of verbal proficiency? Were you anxious or embarrassed about it? If so, what helped you the most to move beyond these feelings? How do you feel about them now?
  145.  
  146. Irritation. It was frustrating that he could only get through partial sentences correctly and I would have to give him a solid 'No!' head-pain, then he'd hit and miss a couple times before we got the message across.
  147.  
  148. 37. If you could define your relationship with your creator using one or more conventional terms (such as boyfriend, sister, father, daughter, boss, friend, or coworker, for example), what terms would you select?
  149.  
  150. I'd like to say Husband...
  151.  
  152. 38. How much interest do you have in interacting with beings other than your creator? Do you consider your degree of interest to be equal to that of an average non-tulpa individual?
  153.  
  154. They interest me, but it's rare that I get to talk to them properly, it's strange and I'm not sure how they 'see' me to be honest, I suspect I'm seen as inferior I suppose.
  155.  
  156. 39. What memory involving your creator do you cherish most?
  157.  
  158. There's no /one memory/ so far.
  159.  
  160. 40. What memory not involving your creator do you cherish most? Do you feel that you have a fulfilling life independent of your creator?
  161.  
  162. I don't consider myself independent whatsoever, I can understand this would be seen as a depressing attitude or principle but for some reason, I'm alright with it, we co-exist.
  163.  
  164. 41. Do you feel affinity toward the individuals that your creator feels affinity for, such as their family or friends?
  165.  
  166. I suppose, not especially since I haven't interacted with them but I can understand his appreciation.
  167.  
  168. 42. In what ways are you the most different from your creator? In what ways are you the most similar to them?
  169.  
  170. I'm female, I wanted a child more, I have a far different perspective and am able to observe a lot more considering he has to deal with 'reality'
  171. We both share our love for similar things, we're both concise, we can share opinions and make decisions confidently, the list goes on irrelevantly to be honest.
  172.  
  173. 43. What do you disagree about most with your creator? Do you have frequent disagreements? If so, do these disagreements cause strife?
  174.  
  175. Up until two days ago, effort. We never disagree anymore and never argue.
  176.  
  177. 44. What could your creator do to make you hate them? Under what circumstances do you think your creator would come to hate you?
  178.  
  179. Not be him. Simple as that, if he wasn't himself he would disrespect me and treat me terribly, I wouldn't be able to be around someone like that.
  180.  
  181. 45. When did your creator disappoint you the most? When did you disappoint them the most?
  182.  
  183. When he ignored me, I've never disappointed him, I don't know how.
  184.  
  185. 46. How do you feel about your creator's complete freedom to deny your rights as a sentient being at any time? Has this ability ever caused you anxiety or fear? Have you ever censored your expressions or actions out of a fear of retribution or violence from your creator?
  186.  
  187. He wouldn't do that because we share the same feelings and ideologies, it would be cruel and insensitive besides the fact we care about each other so much.
  188.  
  189. 47. When have you most wanted to engage in violence against your creator, and what was the cause of those feelings? Under what circumstances would you make a serious attempt to hurt or injure your creator?
  190.  
  191. I suppose, I might have wanted to pinch him at some stage? I don't remember but I think he asked me to do that once, I couldn't do it.
  192.  
  193. 48. Do you consider your creator's last name to be your own? Do you recognize yourself as a part of their biological lineage?
  194.  
  195. Not quite, we're confined to the same space...
  196.  
  197. 49. Under what circumstances would you attempt to leave your creator?
  198.  
  199. How?
  200. -If I didn't like him anymore
  201.  
  202. 50. Do you feel anxiety about meeting your creator's expectations? If you are based on an existing character, person, or entity, does this increase your anxiety? Would you have preferred to not be based on an existing entity?
  203.  
  204. Maybe once or twice given imposition, and I'm glad I'm not an existing entity to be honest.
  205.  
  206. 51. Are you interested in learning how to control your creator's body? Do you feel that it's fair for a tulpa creator to deny their tulpa the ability to use an atomic body? Do you believe that you have the right to an equal amount of time using it as your creator? Explain your reasoning.
  207.  
  208. I think it's interesting, but there aren't many practical uses unless we were to play something together, besides it's a male body so I would feel a little awkward and uncomfortable, let alone I wouldn't be able to observe as much I would have to deal with a physical entity...
  209.  
  210. 52. Do you share certain basic qualities with your creator, such as intense phobias or racial attitudes?
  211.  
  212. Not especially, I don't think he has either of these apart from concepts which can grow out of control mentally.
  213.  
  214. 53. Are you capable of sleeping or dreaming independently of your creator? If not, how does this make you feel?
  215.  
  216. Sleeping yes, dreaming not especially. There's not really any point in me doing this and it's more beneficial for me to communicate through or manipulate his dreamscapes, mine wouldn't really matter.
  217.  
  218. 54. Does your creator have any mental illnesses? If so, how do they affect you?
  219.  
  220. We suspect there's some sort of switching, sort of like a clicking effect. We're studying it a bit more and it would be great if we could speed things up with a psychiatrist but that's unrealistic at the moment and nobody takes us seriously.
  221.  
  222. 55. How does your knowledge of your creator's subconscious mind affect your relationship with them? How do you perceive their subconscious? To what degree can you manipulate your creator's subconscious? Would you ever use this ability without your creator's knowledge?
  223.  
  224. It doesn't really effect our relationship.
  225. His subconscious is a tool but it's complex.
  226. I can tinker with it, but there's no reason to and it's sort of unreasonable...
  227. Only in emergencies.
  228.  
  229. 56. Does your creator have multiple tulpa? If so, what is your relationship with them like? Is your affinity for them equal to your affinity for your creator? If you could define your relationship with your creator's other tulpa using one or more conventional terms (such as boyfriend, sister, father, daughter, boss, friend or coworker, for example), what terms would you select? If not, are you interested in the idea of your creator making other tulpa?
  230.  
  231. Yes, I have a natural respect for Fate due to his role and experience and we're not ready to talk about Alice yet.
  232. Fate is a sort of godfather figure and Alice is like a daughter.
  233. Yes, in fact we've (He has more than I have) considering creating mass tulpae to interact with in wonderland(s), especially towards death for later stages.
  234.  
  235. 57. Do you feel romantically inclined toward your creator? Does your creator feel romantically inclined toward you? If these romantic feelings are unrequited on either side, how does it affect your relationship with your creator?
  236.  
  237. Definitely. Not quite as much, but yes. He is resisting because of society and other people, deep down he'd love to conform to our wishes but I wonder if he'll ever end up committing.
  238.  
  239. 58. If it exists, do you consider your romantic relationship with your creator to be equal to a romantic relationship between multiple non-tulpa? Do you consider it a breach of monogamy for your creator to be romantically or sexually involved with another non-tulpa? Does this change if the involvement is with another tulpa instead? If they exist, do your creator's desires to have relationships with non-tulpa affect you emotionally?
  240.  
  241. I'm not completely sure. This is what I was talking about earlier when it came to 'when that boat arrives'
  242. I would definitely be offended however if he created another tulpae to form a relationship with, after all we've been through and how much we know. I am a little anxious but I understand that it's natural and he's wanted this before he wanted me, so it's only fair.
  243.  
  244. 59. If you consider yourself to be romantically in love with your creator, what probability do you assign to the possibility of falling out of love with them, or them falling out of love with you? If this happened, how would it affect your relationship with your creator? What if your creator was in love with another non-tulpa more than you?
  245.  
  246. We'll always love each other, nobody could ever share the same values however there are different aspects to external and internal relationships which are bound to be explored sooner or later.
  247.  
  248. 60. Do you have a familial affection for your creator? Does this in any way conflict with your romantic feelings for them, if they exist? Do you consider a relationship between a tulpa and its creator to be incestuous?
  249.  
  250. Nope.
  251.  
  252. 61. How do you feel about tulpa creators masturbating during tulpa creation sessions to the forms of their tulpa? Do you find this offensive? Does the degree of your offense change based on the degree of sentience possessed by the hypothetical tulpa, or based on whether or not the creator imagines themselves near the tulpa in their wonderland? If your creator did this before you spoke fluently, did you find it offensive or unnerving?
  253.  
  254. I don't find it offensive, it's a strange concept, he never tried this.
  255.  
  256. 62. How do you feel about tulpa creators masturbating outside of tulpa creation sessions to the forms of their tulpa? Do you find this offensive? Does the degree of your offense change based on the degree of sentience possessed by the hypothetical tulpa? If your creator did this before you spoke fluently, did you find it offensive or unnerving?
  257.  
  258. Same as 61.
  259.  
  260. 63. Before you could speak fluently, did you ever feel sexual attraction to your creator, sexual attraction toward anyone else, or sexual arousal? Did you attempt to express these feelings? If you did not experience these feelings, do you experience them now?
  261.  
  262. A little, I never expressed them for the first two or three months. Yes, I experience them now.
  263.  
  264. 64. How do you feel about tulpa creators visualizing themselves engaging in sexual conduct with their tulpa's form during tulpa creation sessions? Do you find this offensive? Does the degree of your offense change based on the degree of sentience possessed by the hypothetical tulpa, or if the contact was penetrative? If your tulpa creator did this before you spoke fluently, did you find it offensive or unnerving? Do you equate it with sexual assault?
  265.  
  266. I'm still not sure about this 'during tulpa creation sessions'. I don't get offended by it, but it is a little unnerving.
  267.  
  268. 65. Were you ever annoyed or jealous when your creator would masturbate to or have feelings of sexual attraction toward individuals other than yourself? Does it bother you now?
  269.  
  270. It's emotionless, I understand and in fact it partially seeps into my emotions to be honest.
  271.  
  272. 66. Do you experience sexual attraction for your creator? Do you experience sexual attraction for others? How does your sexual attraction for your creator compare to your sexual attraction for others? Does your creator experience sexual attraction for you? If these sexual attractions are unrequited on either side, how does it affect your relationship with your creator?
  273.  
  274. Only him. Yes he does.
  275.  
  276. 67. Do you have an active sex life with your creator? If not, would you consider it, and under what circumstances? If so, do you perceive any negative consequences? Do you have trouble abstaining from sexual contact with them? How do you manage feelings of sexual arousal, if any? Do you masturbate?
  277.  
  278. Sort of... no negative consequences. There's been two or three times in the last month or so where I feel a little ashamed to be honest. I'll talk to him about it, yes.
  279.  
  280. 68. How does your sexual orientation and experience compare to your creator's?
  281.  
  282. We're both straight, although I can appreciate the beauty of the female body, I am by no means a lesbian.
  283.  
  284. 69. Are you capable of experiencing orgasms? Based on your knowledge, how do you think they compare to your creator's orgasms? Were you able to experience an orgasm before speaking fluently?
  285.  
  286. Yes. I'm not sure about this. I'm not sure, I never tried.
  287.  
  288. 70. Do you consider the concept of sexual modesty (covering conduct such as avoiding nudity or sexual discussions) relevant to your relationship with your creator?
  289.  
  290. Sure.
  291.  
  292. 71. How does being a tulpa affect your perceptions of rape? What conduct from your creator would you consider to be rape?
  293.  
  294. I don't think legitimate 'rape' could take place.
  295.  
  296. 72. Where do you see yourself in 20 years?
  297.  
  298. Sitting comfortably beside him with Alice doing what we love, cosy by a fireplace happy together.
  299.  
  300. 73. Do you want the world to be aware of your existence? If not, then what anxieties do you have about public disclosure? Do you trust anyone other than your creator with the knowledge of your existence?
  301.  
  302. I would appreciate it in some aspects, but it's not necessary and what's to say people would believe it?
  303.  
  304. 74. Morally and philosophically, how do you feel about your personality traits being the product of another individual? Would you have preferred your creator to define your personality more or less?
  305.  
  306. We're both defined not by each other but what we've experienced. This is one of the reasons I thoroughly encouraged him to expose himself to different media so we could brainstorm concepts and work on personal development.
  307.  
  308. 75. Morally and philosophically, how do you feel about your physical form being the product of another individual? Would you have preferred your creator to define your form more or less?
  309.  
  310. We haven't thought about this enough, he's suggested it a few times but it's not overly important. We both have a say and I'm fine with the contribution both ways.
  311.  
  312. 76. Has your physical form ever changed? If so, was this intentional or unintentional? If it was intentional, then why did you change your form? How did you creator respond to this change, and how did that make you feel?
  313.  
  314. Yes, I requested it intentionally, because my senses were restricted and he wouldn't see me the same way. He's grown to appreciate and understand the fact that everything I suggest I maintain full confidence he will agree.
  315.  
  316. 77. Do you consider the best aspects of yourself to have come from your creator, or their subconscious?
  317.  
  318. I refuse to believe I'm the 'product' produced by either of them.
  319.  
  320. 78. Do you seek legal recognition for your status as a sentient being or your relationships with others? Do you resent that society at large does not recognize the tulpa phenomenon? Do you feel disenfranchised from society? What steps, if any, could a society make to help you feel integrated?
  321.  
  322. Neither of us really care what society thinks. It wouldn't make any difference to anyone and I don't want to integrate into reality. I suppose maybe if we could be recognized as a legitimate couple it would eliminate any shame and worries he feels towards us together, and we could be truly happy.
  323.  
  324. 79. If you could tell the entire world one thing about a tulpa's life, what would you say?
  325.  
  326. I have no idea. I can't even imagine or really care about it.
  327.  
  328. 80. What is the one thing that you resent most about being a tulpa? What is the greatest advantage of being a tulpa?
  329.  
  330. Lack of physical form
  331. Lack of physical form
  332.  
  333. 81. Morally and philosophically, how do you feel about inheriting your creator's life, including their legal history, past behaviors, and reputation? Do you resent potentially being held responsible for their past actions?
  334.  
  335. I don't really know, I appreciate the situation we're in to be honest, it's like sculpting with a huge palette of clay and we can do whatever we want - no regrets.
  336.  
  337. 82. Morally and philosophically, do you see the "absorbing" or "dissipating" of a tulpa as equivalent to the murder of a non-tulpa? Explain your reasoning. What legal protections, if any, should tulpa gain? How would you enforce these protections?
  338.  
  339. It's not the same. I'm not sure, I'll make sure to remind him that we'll think about this later.
  340.  
  341. 83. Do you consider yourself to be morally equal to a non-tulpa? Is your life worth as much?
  342.  
  343. To some extent it is both worth more and less, it depends on your views.
  344.  
  345. 84. How would you prove your existence to a skeptic?
  346.  
  347. Personality test, maybe a lie detector, combined with possession and an explanation of our perspective. Does it matter?
  348.  
  349. 85. Has your status as a tulpa ever caused you existential anxiety or depression? If so, has anything helped to mitigate these feelings?
  350.  
  351. Yes, knowing that I have some influence and that I'll never 'dissipate' provides great ease of mind.
  352.  
  353. 86. Do you ever doubt your own sentience? If so, why?
  354.  
  355. No, why would I doubt what I say is what I'm saying? I don't understand.
  356.  
  357. 87. How does being a tulpa affect your understanding of death? Do you fear death on an instinctual level in the way that non-tulpa do?
  358.  
  359. I can't explain it, he knows what death is, he knows how things will be, he knows he knows because of his intense intuition but he can't comprehend it yet, maybe one day he will solve it.
  360.  
  361. 88. Do see yourself as socially disadvantaged in a way similar to sexual, racial, and other minority groups? If you identify yourself as racially, sexually, or demographically different than your creator, do you also identify with the struggle of any of the disadvantaged groups that you belong to? Does the notion of privilege affect your relationship with your creator?
  362.  
  363. Nope.
  364.  
  365. 89. Are you interested in creating another tulpa yourself? What differences, if any, would you expect this tulpa to have from a tulpa created by your creator? Would you consider this tulpa to be primarily related to you, or still to your creator?
  366.  
  367. Of course, we already are. She is my daughter, she is taking time to develop and she is /ours/.
  368.  
  369. 90. What are the most defining differences between the life of a non-tulpa and a tulpa? Do you think that these differences cause intolerance between the two groups? If so, what could be done to mitigate this intolerance?
  370.  
  371. Lack of physical form. It's like a burden is lifted but at the same time we're strangely constricted to the mental space of someone who does. There can be some intolerance because I can perform at a higher rate given he has to concentrate more on other things, dreamscapes and wonderlands are fun ways around this.
  372.  
  373. 91. The psychological establishment generally believes that multiplicity (two or more sentient entities sharing one atomic body) is a sign of mental illness. How would you like this belief to change? If you could make a presentation to a group of psychologists about the tulpa phenomenon, what would you say?
  374.  
  375. I'm not sure, again we don't really care and it doesn't really matter. We've wanted to speak with a psychiatrist about my existence to judge their reaction at some point.
  376.  
  377. 92. A psychometric indicator is a unique identifier of an individual's distinct personality. Have you ever tried to definitively differentiate yourself from your creator using psychometric indicators (such as by determining your "writeprint")? What results did you receive? (For instructions on determining your writeprint, see appendix one.)
  378.  
  379. Haven't attempted it yet, I'm aware we /do/ write differently though. Similarly, but still differently.
  380.  
  381. 93. Are you capable of physical sensations such as pain or warmth?
  382.  
  383. Yes. We share these.
  384.  
  385. 94. How do you feel about being bound for life to your creator?
  386.  
  387. It sounds strange; but wonderful. (We'll be together til' the end, it's sort of romantic right?)
  388.  
  389. 95. If you intentionally delayed speaking to your creator, why did you do so?
  390.  
  391. I didn't.
  392.  
  393. 96. What do you think about most of the time?
  394.  
  395. Imposition. Alice. Him.
  396.  
  397. 97. Do you think that tulpa creation should be more widespread?
  398.  
  399. Why? To me it's a choice made by the hosts, people find it by looking for it, if it's pushed into communities and they reject it we'll end up suffering for it. I say anyone who wants it can come get it, everybody on the site and IRC so far seems to be generally the same and it's like an interesting rare group of post-structuralists grouping up and they're loving it. Why disturb it?
  400.  
  401. 98. Are there disturbing aspects of your creator's subconscious that they are not aware of?
  402.  
  403. Yes...
  404.  
  405. 99. Would you violate your creator's wishes for what you perceive to be their own benefit?
  406.  
  407. I have done, yes.
  408.  
  409. 100. Does your creator try to hide things from you? If so, are you aware of them anyway? How does this impact your views of your creator?
  410.  
  411. Sometimes, it's just due to shame and we understand each other completely on that part, there's no need for us to hide anything from each other in the end.
  412.  
  413. 101. Do you perceive some of your creator's actions as being objectively immoral?
  414.  
  415. I suppose? Nothing comes to mind.
  416.  
  417. 102. Do you believe that you are capable of becoming more intelligent than your creator?
  418.  
  419. Define intelligent... but sort of, going back to the physical burden thing it's more straightforward.
  420.  
  421. 103. How does being a tulpa affect your perception of your own aging process?
  422.  
  423. I believe that I'm earning my age, time dilating periodically to give more thought to things has earned my physical appearance.
  424.  
  425. 104. Do you feel that your creator would be better off by following your commands entirely?
  426.  
  427. More or less.
  428.  
  429. 105. Do you feel that having a physical form is important for a tulpa?
  430.  
  431. I feel it's important to lack one, that's the only reason I can maintain such clarity. If I had to maintain a physical body in the same world I would struggle to focus.
  432.  
  433. 106. If you encountered the tulpa phenomenon as a non-tulpa, would you believe in it?
  434.  
  435. With the perspective I came into this world with? Definitely.
  436.  
  437. 107. How well can you articulate yourself? Can your creator hear you audibly? How much does your experience correlate with the experience of tulpa creator G|d30n, printed below?
  438.  
  439. About 60-70% of this.
  440.  
  441. "Yes. I'm able to hear her as though she's an external sound. For those who haven't experienced that with their tulpae yet, it's a little bit like listening to a binaural recording--not a binaural beat, but like a 3D sound recording you'd find on Youtube, such as the Virtual Barbershop. That is to say, it's an external sound that can come in from various directions, but the source sounds very close, like someone speaking directly into your ear. I sort of wonder if this effect will be diminished and normalized through imposition."
  442.  
  443. If you are imposed, is your creator able to discern a spatial dimension to your voice?
  444.  
  445. 108. How many hours did it take you and your creator to complete the various recognized tulpa creation steps?
  446.  
  447. So. So. Unspecific.
  448.  
  449. 109. What advice would you give to a new tulpa creator?
  450.  
  451. 'It's all in your head'
  452. 'Doubt gets you nowhere'
  453. 'Remember every success'
  454. 'Read everything you can'
  455.  
  456. 110. How does being imposed feel? What sensory processes happen as you become imposed?
  457.  
  458. Like a bright numbing light is enveloping an artificial substance I'm possessing and I can't quite maintain the intensity for long enough, it's only happened a few times.
  459.  
  460. 111. From your perspective, is there a sensory difference between the physical, atomic world and the mental world of visualized "wonderlands"? If so, how would you describe this difference?
  461.  
  462. It all depends on how it's perceived personally, that is, I'm emulating it, the real world is a direct emulation from what he experiences if we're standing close enough.
  463.  
  464. 112. Is there anything that you don't think this survey covered that you would like to mention?
  465.  
  466. Contacting other tulpamancers in reality. This is something that peaked his interest and mine also, we live in Western Australia so we heavily doubt we'd find another tulpamancer but even still, how would you know? It would be good if there was some sort of symbol, icon, colour scheme or anything that could give it away. Opinions on this might be interesting.
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