NotTheLegalFictionDave awoke. Something wasn't quite right. Yes the fire had dwindled and the night air had started to take on something of brisk edge, but that was to be expected. No there was something different, something making the hairs on the back of his neck stand to attention. Then he recoiled in shock suddenly aware of the figure standing right next to him as if they had been there all along. The figure was tall and thin in a dark-robe.
It Spoke.

'DAVID THORN. I PRESUME'

NotTheLegalFictionDave managed to evoke a sound kind of resembling a response of ".....huhhuhwhoareyou!"

'I AM HE WHO RIDES THE PALE HORSE. I AM THE ALPHA AND THE OMEGA. I AM DEATH'

"Well you scared me half to death!" said NotTheLegalFictionDave managing not to process any of what he just heard

"A LITTLE MORE THAN HALF I THINK" replied Death

"I mean what kind of person wanders around the woods at night and sneaks up on a fellow just trying to get some shut eye" complained NotTheLegalFictionDave

"I'M SORRY"said Death genuinely sorry

"I've got to be in court tomorrow to argue my case before the judge, and now thanks to you I might be too tired and not be able to argue my case." said NotTheLegalFictionDave continuing to complain.

"I'M REALLY VERY SORRY" said Death really very sorry.

"Do you have any idea how long I've preparing for tomorrow, oh its all well and good trying to live the life of a freeman of the land, but the moment they find out about it 'Oh no can't be having that, can't have people going around thinking they are free!'. All I wanted was to live my life free and unencumbered by the gross vicissitudes of THE STATE.."

Death learnt long ago this monologuing was perhaps some emotional necessity on the part of the recently departed to help process unresolved emotions and ambitions. Usually the more they talked the more they tended towards the conclusion that was their fate, so he was happy just to let them get it out of their system, also it made for great exposition.

"...I mean where's the logic in believing that you have a right to anything you can't immediately tangibly interact with!? you know what? you know what I think?"

"WHAT!"

"...I reckon the first person to think up the notion of 'OWNERSHIP' was the first person who refused to really contribute to the tribe and was happier having others do the hardwork. They claim the land that has the most food and fruit and makes everyone else go foraging further afield whilst he sits about not contributing, just like that Judge I'm gonna see tomorrow.

"AND SO WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU'VE GOTTEN FAT ON THE LOCAL DEER AND THE HUNTERS HAVE TO TRAVEL FURTHER AFIELD TO FIND MORE DEER?"

"...what!?"

"QUITE. AS I WAS SAYING BEFORE WE GOT SIDE TRACKED. DAVID THORN I HAVE COME FOR YOU!"

"I'm not David Thorn"

"YOUR LIFE HAS.......WHAT!!?, OH BUGGER I COULD HAVE SWORN"

Death almost ceremoniously (because inifinity tends to get you stuck in your ways a bit) took a large hour glass out of some recess within his ebon robe and examined it closely. The sand completely contained within its lower sphere.

"NO, DAVID THORN IS CORRECT. YOU ARE DAVID THORN"

"well you see" said NotTheLegalFictionDave "I was given that name at birth, but I never signed no contract myself so whilst there is definitely a birth certificate with that name on it, I myself never consented or signed any document to that effect, so I'm not David Thorn. You see?"

"I'M AFRAID I DO" said Death beginning to realise just what he was dealing with.

"YOU SEE WHILST YOU YOURSELF NEVER SIGNED SAID CONTRACT, YOUR LEGAL GUARDIAN, BEING ONE WHO BROUGHT YOU INTO THE UNIVERSE, SIGNED A CONTRACT WITH SAID UNIVERSE SUCH THAT WHEN YOU WERE NAMED YOU WERE ANTHROPOMORPHISED INTO SAID BODY."

"...you what?"

"AS SUCH WHILST YOU YOURSELF MAY NOT CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE THE DAVID THORN, THE UNIVERSE SEE'S THINGS QUITE DIFFERENTLY"

"..but"

"AS IF SAID CONTRACT HAD NOT BEEN SIGNED YOU WOULD IN FACT NO EXIST. THUS YOU ARE DAVID THORN. AT LEAST IN THE AREAS IN WHICH IT COUNTS"

"..."

"I'M SORRY"

"....its not fair, I just wanted to be free"

"I KNOW"

"....it was going so well too, I'd already planned out how i was gonna survive winter"

"I KNOW"

"...I was gonna build a treehouse, and fish and i was not gonna have to deal with anyone once I had gotten over this pesky legal trouble with the deer"

"YES"

"........so what now?"