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Long Shot (2019)

theaceboyyat Jul 16th, 2019 266 Never
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  1. 1
  2. 00:00:49,983 --> 00:00:54,983
  3. Subtitles by explosiveskull
  4. www.OpenSubtitles.org
  5.  
  6. 2
  7. 00:00:56,388 --> 00:00:57,889
  8. <i>I don't know
  9. what the fuck is going on</i>
  10.  
  11. 3
  12. 00:00:57,891 --> 00:00:59,657
  13. <i>in this country, man!</i>
  14.  
  15. 4
  16. 00:00:59,659 --> 00:01:01,993
  17. <i>Every day I turn on the TV,</i>
  18.  
  19. 5
  20. 00:01:01,995 --> 00:01:05,864
  21. <i>and I see these fucking freaks
  22. marching for their rights!</i>
  23.  
  24. 6
  25. 00:01:07,801 --> 00:01:09,567
  26. What about our rights?
  27.  
  28. 7
  29. 00:01:11,337 --> 00:01:13,738
  30. This is our time
  31. to show the world
  32.  
  33. 8
  34. 00:01:13,740 --> 00:01:15,774
  35. that we are not
  36. just an online movement!
  37.  
  38. 9
  39. 00:01:17,677 --> 00:01:18,843
  40. <i>We're growing physically!</i>
  41.  
  42. 10
  43. 00:01:18,845 --> 00:01:21,546
  44. This is our time
  45. to assert ourselves
  46.  
  47. 11
  48. 00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:23,581
  49. as the true voice of America!
  50.  
  51. 12
  52. 00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:25,750
  53. Yeah!
  54.  
  55. 13
  56. 00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:27,018
  57. Yes, let's do that!
  58.  
  59. 14
  60. 00:01:27,020 --> 00:01:29,687
  61. Now, you may have noticed
  62.  
  63. 15
  64. 00:01:29,689 --> 00:01:31,890
  65. that our friend Aryan Grande
  66.  
  67. 16
  68. 00:01:31,892 --> 00:01:33,625
  69. has brought in a new recruit.
  70.  
  71. 17
  72. 00:01:33,627 --> 00:01:36,394
  73. FucktheJews82.
  74. Welcome, brother!
  75.  
  76. 18
  77. 00:01:36,396 --> 00:01:38,298
  78. Yeah!
  79.  
  80. 19
  81. 00:01:39,366 --> 00:01:41,432
  82. Hi. <i>Heil. Heil,</i> everybody.
  83.  
  84. 20
  85. 00:01:41,434 --> 00:01:43,368
  86. White power. Obviously.
  87.  
  88. 21
  89. 00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:46,404
  90. Been a big fan of you guys
  91. for a while.
  92.  
  93. 22
  94. 00:01:46,406 --> 00:01:47,572
  95. Since World War II, really.
  96.  
  97. 23
  98. 00:01:47,574 --> 00:01:51,676
  99. That's when you made your
  100. big entrance, on the scene.
  101.  
  102. 24
  103. 00:01:51,678 --> 00:01:55,015
  104. And, uh... Yeah.
  105. Just, um, in closing...
  106.  
  107. 25
  108. 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,416
  109. - Fuck the Jews!
  110. - Yeah!
  111.  
  112. 26
  113. 00:01:58,418 --> 00:02:00,453
  114. Welcome!
  115.  
  116. 27
  117. 00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:03,621
  118. Let's fucking party!
  119.  
  120. 28
  121. 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:15,967
  122. So you guys are, like, pretty
  123. active on social media, right?
  124.  
  125. 29
  126. 00:02:15,969 --> 00:02:17,102
  127. Yeah.
  128.  
  129. 30
  130. 00:02:17,104 --> 00:02:19,138
  131. How many times a day would you
  132. say you tweet on average?
  133.  
  134. 31
  135. 00:02:19,140 --> 00:02:21,739
  136. - Hey, FTJ!
  137. - Yo!
  138.  
  139. 32
  140. 00:02:21,741 --> 00:02:24,076
  141. You said you wanted
  142. a swastika tattoo.
  143.  
  144. 33
  145. 00:02:24,078 --> 00:02:25,412
  146. Now's your chance.
  147.  
  148. 34
  149. 00:02:26,513 --> 00:02:28,981
  150. Yeah, you know, I've been
  151. thinking about it. I'm cool.
  152.  
  153. 35
  154. 00:02:28,983 --> 00:02:31,651
  155. Come on, man.
  156. We all got 'em!
  157.  
  158. 36
  159. 00:02:38,892 --> 00:02:40,558
  160. You guys want me to get
  161. a swastika tattoo?
  162.  
  163. 37
  164. 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:41,961
  165. Yeah!
  166.  
  167. 38
  168. 00:02:41,963 --> 00:02:43,763
  169. I will get a swastika tattoo.
  170.  
  171. 39
  172. 00:02:44,464 --> 00:02:45,864
  173. Um...
  174.  
  175. 40
  176. 00:02:45,866 --> 00:02:47,034
  177. Yeah.
  178.  
  179. 41
  180. 00:02:49,636 --> 00:02:51,805
  181. Hey, take over, man.
  182. I got to take a piss.
  183.  
  184. 42
  185. 00:02:53,506 --> 00:02:55,440
  186. Super cool, guys.
  187. Thank you for this.
  188.  
  189. 43
  190. 00:02:55,442 --> 00:02:56,610
  191. This is really exciting.
  192.  
  193. 44
  194. 00:02:57,777 --> 00:02:59,979
  195. All right, here we go!
  196.  
  197. 45
  198. 00:03:01,448 --> 00:03:03,615
  199. Ooh, right! Yeah!
  200.  
  201. 46
  202. 00:03:03,617 --> 00:03:05,084
  203. That hurt?
  204.  
  205. 47
  206. 00:03:05,086 --> 00:03:07,088
  207. On many levels. Yes.
  208.  
  209. 48
  210. 00:03:08,856 --> 00:03:09,924
  211. Fuck!
  212.  
  213. 49
  214. 00:03:10,758 --> 00:03:12,927
  215. Hey! This you?
  216.  
  217. 50
  218. 00:03:14,061 --> 00:03:15,763
  219. You're a journalist?
  220.  
  221. 51
  222. 00:03:16,764 --> 00:03:18,030
  223. Yeah!
  224.  
  225. 52
  226. 00:03:18,032 --> 00:03:20,665
  227. We all got to be fucking
  228. journalists in this day and age,
  229.  
  230. 53
  231. 00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:23,601
  232. mainstream media not covering
  233. our side of the story!
  234.  
  235. 54
  236. 00:03:23,603 --> 00:03:25,637
  237. His name is Fred Flarsky.
  238.  
  239. 55
  240. 00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:27,206
  241. He writes for
  242. the <i>Brooklyn Advocate.</i>
  243.  
  244. 56
  245. 00:03:27,208 --> 00:03:29,875
  246. - He's a fucking Jew!
  247. - What?
  248.  
  249. 57
  250. 00:03:29,877 --> 00:03:32,512
  251. Look, look, look.
  252. Okay, okay, okay. Hey!
  253.  
  254. 58
  255. 00:03:34,849 --> 00:03:35,714
  256. What are you doing here?
  257.  
  258. 59
  259. 00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:37,182
  260. You're here to fucking
  261. embarrass us, huh?
  262.  
  263. 60
  264. 00:03:37,184 --> 00:03:39,151
  265. - Who sent you?
  266. - No one sent me!
  267.  
  268. 61
  269. 00:03:39,153 --> 00:03:40,920
  270. It's okay. I'm... I'm...
  271.  
  272. 62
  273. 00:03:40,922 --> 00:03:43,656
  274. He's been recording us
  275. the whole time!
  276.  
  277. 63
  278. 00:03:43,658 --> 00:03:46,158
  279. Fucking shit, man!
  280. You infiltrated our group!
  281.  
  282. 64
  283. 00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:48,060
  284. You're gonna fucking die!
  285.  
  286. 65
  287. 00:03:48,062 --> 00:03:48,961
  288. How do you
  289. turn this thing off?
  290.  
  291. 66
  292. 00:03:48,963 --> 00:03:50,798
  293. The fucking red button,
  294. right there, man!
  295.  
  296. 67
  297. 00:03:57,872 --> 00:03:59,573
  298. Holy shit!
  299.  
  300. 68
  301. 00:04:06,013 --> 00:04:09,515
  302. Yeah!
  303.  
  304. 69
  305. 00:04:09,517 --> 00:04:11,852
  306. Not only did I escape...
  307.  
  308. 70
  309. 00:04:13,254 --> 00:04:15,287
  310. I held onto my phone!
  311.  
  312. 71
  313. 00:04:15,289 --> 00:04:17,558
  314. Yes! Ow!
  315.  
  316. 72
  317. 00:04:19,961 --> 00:04:21,727
  318. I trusted you, man!
  319.  
  320. 73
  321. 00:04:21,729 --> 00:04:23,295
  322. Yeah, well...
  323.  
  324. 74
  325. 00:04:23,297 --> 00:04:25,967
  326. Jews win this round,
  327. motherfucker!
  328.  
  329. 75
  330. 00:04:26,734 --> 00:04:29,001
  331. Peace! Ow.
  332.  
  333. 76
  334. 00:04:29,003 --> 00:04:30,602
  335. <i>Tonight on</i> Wembley News,
  336.  
  337. 77
  338. 00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:32,838
  339. <i>we take an in-depth look
  340. at Charlotte Field,</i>
  341.  
  342. 78
  343. 00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:35,641
  344. <i>a Rhodes Scholar,
  345. a Pulitzer winner,</i>
  346.  
  347. 79
  348. 00:04:35,643 --> 00:04:38,311
  349. <i>and protege
  350. of President Chambers,</i>
  351.  
  352. 80
  353. 00:04:38,313 --> 00:04:40,212
  354. <i>who tapped Field two years ago</i>
  355.  
  356. 81
  357. 00:04:40,214 --> 00:04:42,681
  358. <i>to be the youngest
  359. secretary of state</i>
  360.  
  361. 82
  362. 00:04:42,683 --> 00:04:44,083
  363. <i>in the history of this nation.</i>
  364.  
  365. 83
  366. 00:04:44,085 --> 00:04:46,552
  367. <i>And honestly,
  368. looking hotter than usual.</i>
  369.  
  370. 84
  371. 00:04:46,554 --> 00:04:48,321
  372. <i>Now, people are gonna say
  373. that's sexist,</i>
  374.  
  375. 85
  376. 00:04:48,323 --> 00:04:50,323
  377. <i>but, she's just hot!</i>
  378.  
  379. 86
  380. 00:04:50,325 --> 00:04:51,824
  381. <i>You know,
  382. when we talk about women in this way,</i>
  383.  
  384. 87
  385. 00:04:51,826 --> 00:04:53,559
  386. <i>it is because
  387. we respect them so much,</i>
  388.  
  389. 88
  390. 00:04:53,561 --> 00:04:54,994
  391. <i>and we start with their body.</i>
  392.  
  393. 89
  394. 00:04:54,996 --> 00:04:56,697
  395. <i>You two are terrible.</i>
  396.  
  397. 90
  398. 00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:02,503
  399. - Good night, Steven.
  400. - Good night, Madam Secretary.
  401.  
  402. 91
  403. 00:05:06,841 --> 00:05:08,774
  404. Sorry for the late call,
  405. Mr. Foreign Minister.
  406.  
  407. 92
  408. 00:05:08,776 --> 00:05:09,875
  409. Long day.
  410.  
  411. 93
  412. 00:05:09,877 --> 00:05:11,344
  413. Three bilaterals.
  414.  
  415. 94
  416. 00:05:11,346 --> 00:05:14,113
  417. Listen, we're not going to be
  418. able to do it.
  419.  
  420. 95
  421. 00:05:14,115 --> 00:05:16,349
  422. There's just not enough
  423. traction around this thing.
  424.  
  425. 96
  426. 00:05:16,351 --> 00:05:19,352
  427. I believe in it, it's just...
  428. I don't have Congress support.
  429.  
  430. 97
  431. 00:05:19,354 --> 00:05:21,053
  432. I don't have
  433. the American people's support.
  434.  
  435. 98
  436. 00:05:21,055 --> 00:05:23,123
  437. I know you and I
  438. don't like it, Chuck,
  439.  
  440. 99
  441. 00:05:23,125 --> 00:05:24,857
  442. but you know who likes it?
  443.  
  444. 100
  445. 00:05:24,859 --> 00:05:28,094
  446. 88% of college-educated
  447. Americans over 45.
  448.  
  449. 101
  450. 00:05:28,096 --> 00:05:29,661
  451. Likely voters.
  452.  
  453. 102
  454. 00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:31,932
  455. That's Gallup.
  456. We have to make this happen.
  457.  
  458. 103
  459. 00:06:07,102 --> 00:06:10,336
  460. Well, I wouldn't call
  461. the president inexperienced.
  462.  
  463. 104
  464. 00:06:10,338 --> 00:06:11,905
  465. I mean,
  466. he did play a president
  467.  
  468. 105
  469. 00:06:11,907 --> 00:06:15,741
  470. on a very popular television
  471. show for over a decade.
  472.  
  473. 106
  474. 00:06:15,743 --> 00:06:17,977
  475. You don't get
  476. six Golden Globe nominations
  477.  
  478. 107
  479. 00:06:17,979 --> 00:06:20,080
  480. without being
  481. pretty convincing.
  482.  
  483. 108
  484. 00:06:20,082 --> 00:06:22,648
  485. Um, I do think I'm funny.
  486.  
  487. 109
  488. 00:06:22,650 --> 00:06:24,417
  489. I'm sorry, I thought
  490. this interview was about
  491.  
  492. 110
  493. 00:06:24,419 --> 00:06:26,886
  494. promoting democracy
  495. in Eastern Europe.
  496.  
  497. 111
  498. 00:06:26,888 --> 00:06:28,687
  499. All right, next one's BBC.
  500.  
  501. 112
  502. 00:06:28,689 --> 00:06:30,056
  503. <i>Would you be asking
  504. a male cabinet member</i>
  505.  
  506. 113
  507. 00:06:30,058 --> 00:06:31,725
  508. <i>what products they use
  509. in their hair?</i>
  510.  
  511. 114
  512. 00:06:32,327 --> 00:06:33,993
  513. I'm just kidding.
  514.  
  515. 115
  516. 00:06:33,995 --> 00:06:36,396
  517. No, it's olive oil
  518. and mayonnaise.
  519.  
  520. 116
  521. 00:06:36,398 --> 00:06:38,865
  522. I know. So cheap.
  523. So much shine.
  524.  
  525. 117
  526. 00:06:41,870 --> 00:06:43,803
  527. Good morning, Mr. President.
  528.  
  529. 118
  530. 00:06:43,805 --> 00:06:45,307
  531. Good morning,
  532. Mr. President.
  533.  
  534. 119
  535. 00:06:46,875 --> 00:06:49,242
  536. Good morning, Mr. President.
  537.  
  538. 120
  539. 00:06:49,244 --> 00:06:51,177
  540. Good morning, Mr. President.
  541.  
  542. 121
  543. 00:06:51,179 --> 00:06:52,779
  544. Oh, hey, Charlotte.
  545.  
  546. 122
  547. 00:06:52,781 --> 00:06:55,849
  548. You caught me
  549. watching my show.
  550.  
  551. 123
  552. 00:06:55,851 --> 00:06:58,785
  553. <i>Mr. President. We still
  554. recommend Option C.</i>
  555.  
  556. 124
  557. 00:06:58,787 --> 00:07:01,788
  558. <i>I am not nuking a tsunami!</i>
  559.  
  560. 125
  561. 00:07:01,790 --> 00:07:03,923
  562. Oh, here it is.
  563.  
  564. 126
  565. 00:07:03,925 --> 00:07:05,425
  566. Not now...
  567.  
  568. 127
  569. 00:07:05,427 --> 00:07:07,127
  570. Not today.
  571.  
  572. 128
  573. 00:07:07,129 --> 00:07:08,761
  574. Not in my house.
  575.  
  576. 129
  577. 00:07:08,763 --> 00:07:10,997
  578. Yes! I love that!
  579.  
  580. 130
  581. 00:07:10,999 --> 00:07:12,866
  582. Oh, me too.
  583.  
  584. 131
  585. 00:07:12,868 --> 00:07:14,934
  586. Anyway, that's not why
  587. I called you here.
  588.  
  589. 132
  590. 00:07:17,072 --> 00:07:18,306
  591. Charlotte.
  592.  
  593. 133
  594. 00:07:18,874 --> 00:07:19,906
  595. Yes, sir?
  596.  
  597. 134
  598. 00:07:19,908 --> 00:07:22,909
  599. I will not be
  600. seeking reelection.
  601.  
  602. 135
  603. 00:07:22,911 --> 00:07:24,210
  604. Really?
  605.  
  606. 136
  607. 00:07:24,212 --> 00:07:25,979
  608. Look, I know it's crazy,
  609.  
  610. 137
  611. 00:07:25,981 --> 00:07:28,014
  612. because I'm only halfway
  613. through my first term.
  614.  
  615. 138
  616. 00:07:28,016 --> 00:07:31,084
  617. And you're incredibly
  618. popular, sir.
  619.  
  620. 139
  621. 00:07:31,086 --> 00:07:33,186
  622. And I want to use
  623. that popularity
  624.  
  625. 140
  626. 00:07:33,188 --> 00:07:36,723
  627. to transition into something
  628.  
  629. 141
  630. 00:07:36,725 --> 00:07:39,060
  631. more prestigious
  632. than the presidency.
  633.  
  634. 142
  635. 00:07:40,295 --> 00:07:43,029
  636. I wanna make it in the movies.
  637.  
  638. 143
  639. 00:07:43,031 --> 00:07:46,199
  640. You're going to leave
  641.  
  642. 144
  643. 00:07:46,201 --> 00:07:48,935
  644. the Presidency
  645. to go be in movies?
  646.  
  647. 145
  648. 00:07:48,937 --> 00:07:51,171
  649. - I know. It's gonna be tough.
  650. - Ah...
  651.  
  652. 146
  653. 00:07:51,173 --> 00:07:53,840
  654. Only like, 10 guys
  655. have made that jump
  656.  
  657. 147
  658. 00:07:53,842 --> 00:07:55,775
  659. from TV to film.
  660.  
  661. 148
  662. 00:07:55,777 --> 00:07:58,278
  663. Woody Harrelson,
  664. George Clooney...
  665.  
  666. 149
  667. 00:07:58,280 --> 00:07:59,979
  668. Might be... Might be just two.
  669.  
  670. 150
  671. 00:07:59,981 --> 00:08:03,350
  672. I... Mr. President, have you
  673.  
  674. 151
  675. 00:08:03,352 --> 00:08:07,220
  676. given any consideration
  677. as to whom you might endorse?
  678.  
  679. 152
  680. 00:08:07,222 --> 00:08:09,290
  681. I'm sure you're probably
  682. thinking of McNichol
  683.  
  684. 153
  685. 00:08:09,292 --> 00:08:12,892
  686. or Crowly. Strong choices.
  687.  
  688. 154
  689. 00:08:12,894 --> 00:08:16,731
  690. So strange, because I was
  691. considering a run in 2024.
  692.  
  693. 155
  694. 00:08:17,500 --> 00:08:19,034
  695. And I've been vetted.
  696.  
  697. 156
  698. 00:08:19,768 --> 00:08:21,502
  699. So that's all done.
  700.  
  701. 157
  702. 00:08:21,504 --> 00:08:24,940
  703. And I can't stop thinking
  704. about what...
  705.  
  706. 158
  707. 00:08:26,174 --> 00:08:28,177
  708. What it would do
  709. for your legacy
  710.  
  711. 159
  712. 00:08:29,312 --> 00:08:31,347
  713. to endorse the first
  714. female president.
  715.  
  716. 160
  717. 00:08:33,249 --> 00:08:34,916
  718. I mean... Wow.
  719.  
  720. 161
  721. 00:08:35,351 --> 00:08:36,352
  722. That's a legacy.
  723.  
  724. 162
  725. 00:08:39,888 --> 00:08:41,121
  726. - Charlotte?
  727. - Hmm?
  728.  
  729. 163
  730. 00:08:41,123 --> 00:08:43,390
  731. I would like to endorse you
  732.  
  733. 164
  734. 00:08:43,392 --> 00:08:45,994
  735. to be the next president
  736. of the United States.
  737.  
  738. 165
  739. 00:08:48,029 --> 00:08:51,798
  740. I mean, if you think that's
  741. a good idea, sir, I trust you.
  742.  
  743. 166
  744. 00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:54,468
  745. I'd... I'd be honored.
  746.  
  747. 167
  748. 00:08:54,470 --> 00:08:58,405
  749. I'm gonna be pulling
  750. for Team Charlotte. Right?
  751.  
  752. 168
  753. 00:08:58,407 --> 00:09:00,343
  754. Because you've been
  755. a great secretary.
  756.  
  757. 169
  758. 00:09:01,043 --> 00:09:02,243
  759. ...of state.
  760.  
  761. 170
  762. 00:09:02,245 --> 00:09:04,545
  763. Whatever. It's a cool job.
  764.  
  765. 171
  766. 00:09:04,547 --> 00:09:06,913
  767. And, um, you've done it well.
  768.  
  769. 172
  770. 00:09:06,915 --> 00:09:09,416
  771. - Thank you, sir.
  772. - So stay focused.
  773.  
  774. 173
  775. 00:09:09,418 --> 00:09:10,951
  776. Don't make
  777. any major screw-ups.
  778.  
  779. 174
  780. 00:09:10,953 --> 00:09:12,219
  781. Don't kill any hookers.
  782.  
  783. 175
  784. 00:09:12,221 --> 00:09:13,520
  785. Probably not a problem for you.
  786.  
  787. 176
  788. 00:09:13,522 --> 00:09:15,122
  789. I don't know what you're into.
  790. Whatever.
  791.  
  792. 177
  793. 00:09:15,124 --> 00:09:16,991
  794. And before you know it...
  795.  
  796. 178
  797. 00:09:20,029 --> 00:09:21,161
  798. I like the sound of that.
  799.  
  800. 179
  801. 00:09:21,163 --> 00:09:23,364
  802. <i>♪ Hey, here she comes</i>
  803.  
  804. 180
  805. 00:09:23,366 --> 00:09:25,299
  806. <i>♪ It's the first lady president</i>
  807.  
  808. 181
  809. 00:09:25,301 --> 00:09:28,035
  810. <i>♪ Who can believe
  811. that she's actually a woman</i>
  812.  
  813. 182
  814. 00:09:28,037 --> 00:09:29,570
  815. Thank you, sir.
  816.  
  817. 183
  818. 00:09:29,572 --> 00:09:34,310
  819. <i>♪ She's got a big brain
  820. And a couple other assets ♪</i>
  821.  
  822. 184
  823. 00:09:37,013 --> 00:09:38,078
  824. Oh, and here we see
  825.  
  826. 185
  827. 00:09:38,080 --> 00:09:39,880
  828. Secretary of State
  829. Charlotte Field.
  830.  
  831. 186
  832. 00:09:39,882 --> 00:09:41,115
  833. Good morning.
  834.  
  835. 187
  836. 00:09:42,418 --> 00:09:43,785
  837. Yes!
  838.  
  839. 188
  840. 00:09:47,857 --> 00:09:50,557
  841. So the headline is,
  842. "You're in great shape."
  843.  
  844. 189
  845. 00:09:50,559 --> 00:09:53,227
  846. - Ninety-two, that's good.
  847. - Really good.
  848.  
  849. 190
  850. 00:09:53,229 --> 00:09:54,928
  851. - Yeah.
  852. - And now, keep in mind
  853.  
  854. 191
  855. 00:09:54,930 --> 00:09:57,464
  856. that these are numbers
  857. for a female candidate.
  858.  
  859. 192
  860. 00:09:57,466 --> 00:10:00,868
  861. If you were a man, you'd be
  862. in the 192nd percentile.
  863.  
  864. 193
  865. 00:10:00,870 --> 00:10:03,037
  866. - Well, that seems about right.
  867. - Yeah.
  868.  
  869. 194
  870. 00:10:03,039 --> 00:10:05,139
  871. 'Cause the man... Okay.
  872.  
  873. 195
  874. 00:10:05,141 --> 00:10:08,175
  875. Um, your sense of humor is 82,
  876.  
  877. 196
  878. 00:10:08,177 --> 00:10:10,444
  879. which is solid. It's solid.
  880.  
  881. 197
  882. 00:10:10,446 --> 00:10:12,546
  883. But, you know, we wouldn't
  884. mind seeing those numbers
  885.  
  886. 198
  887. 00:10:12,548 --> 00:10:14,915
  888. go up a few points, or more.
  889.  
  890. 199
  891. 00:10:14,917 --> 00:10:17,117
  892. So, I'm going to get
  893. some writing samples from
  894.  
  895. 200
  896. 00:10:17,119 --> 00:10:18,653
  897. - some funny speech writers.
  898. - Great.
  899.  
  900. 201
  901. 00:10:18,655 --> 00:10:21,989
  902. I am really interested
  903. in knowing how people feel
  904.  
  905. 202
  906. 00:10:21,991 --> 00:10:23,924
  907. - about my accomplishments.
  908. - Yeah.
  909.  
  910. 203
  911. 00:10:23,926 --> 00:10:25,559
  912. Right. You know, so we don't
  913.  
  914. 204
  915. 00:10:25,561 --> 00:10:29,564
  916. drill down
  917. on specific policies.
  918.  
  919. 205
  920. 00:10:29,566 --> 00:10:32,667
  921. And that's only because
  922. people don't seem to care.
  923.  
  924. 206
  925. 00:10:32,669 --> 00:10:34,068
  926. That's interesting.
  927.  
  928. 207
  929. 00:10:34,070 --> 00:10:37,438
  930. With that said, if you could
  931. broker some deal
  932.  
  933. 208
  934. 00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:38,972
  935. that gets you
  936. out there talking
  937.  
  938. 209
  939. 00:10:38,974 --> 00:10:40,341
  940. about a thing that you feel
  941.  
  942. 210
  943. 00:10:40,343 --> 00:10:42,476
  944. really strongly about,
  945. that would be great.
  946.  
  947. 211
  948. 00:10:42,478 --> 00:10:43,410
  949. Well, that's perfect.
  950.  
  951. 212
  952. 00:10:43,412 --> 00:10:45,513
  953. I mean, we've been
  954. looking for an opening
  955.  
  956. 213
  957. 00:10:45,515 --> 00:10:47,450
  958. to start a conversation
  959. about the environment.
  960.  
  961. 214
  962. 00:10:48,250 --> 00:10:50,918
  963. All right.
  964.  
  965. 215
  966. 00:10:50,920 --> 00:10:53,688
  967. Romantically, if I may...
  968.  
  969. 216
  970. 00:10:53,690 --> 00:10:56,691
  971. Remember the stir online
  972.  
  973. 217
  974. 00:10:56,693 --> 00:10:59,293
  975. when the Canadian
  976. Prime Minister and you
  977.  
  978. 218
  979. 00:10:59,295 --> 00:11:01,195
  980. were seated next to each other
  981.  
  982. 219
  983. 00:11:01,197 --> 00:11:02,697
  984. at The Global Business Forum?
  985.  
  986. 220
  987. 00:11:02,699 --> 00:11:04,098
  988. Mmm-hmm.
  989.  
  990. 221
  991. 00:11:04,100 --> 00:11:06,233
  992. A relationship like that
  993.  
  994. 222
  995. 00:11:06,235 --> 00:11:09,004
  996. would push you
  997. into the high 90s.
  998.  
  999. 223
  1000. 00:11:09,439 --> 00:11:12,072
  1001. High 90s? Wow.
  1002.  
  1003. 224
  1004. 00:11:12,074 --> 00:11:13,410
  1005. That brings us to...
  1006.  
  1007. 225
  1008. 00:11:17,146 --> 00:11:19,079
  1009. What's wrong
  1010. with my wave?
  1011.  
  1012. 226
  1013. 00:11:19,081 --> 00:11:21,081
  1014. Um, I think people feel that
  1015.  
  1016. 227
  1017. 00:11:21,083 --> 00:11:24,118
  1018. that level of elbow movement
  1019. is, um...
  1020.  
  1021. 228
  1022. 00:11:24,120 --> 00:11:25,620
  1023. It stresses people out.
  1024.  
  1025. 229
  1026. 00:11:25,622 --> 00:11:28,623
  1027. You know what? It's just
  1028. an area for improvement.
  1029.  
  1030. 230
  1031. 00:11:28,625 --> 00:11:30,392
  1032. Okay, fine,
  1033. I'll work on the wave.
  1034.  
  1035. 231
  1036. 00:11:34,631 --> 00:11:36,264
  1037. - Hey.
  1038. - Hey, Fred.
  1039.  
  1040. 232
  1041. 00:11:36,266 --> 00:11:38,968
  1042. You're gonna love this.
  1043. I almost died.
  1044.  
  1045. 233
  1046. 00:11:39,403 --> 00:11:41,001
  1047. You got a second?
  1048.  
  1049. 234
  1050. 00:11:41,003 --> 00:11:43,671
  1051. - Yeah.
  1052. - Come on.
  1053.  
  1054. 235
  1055. 00:11:43,673 --> 00:11:46,173
  1056. I actually have
  1057. some really great news.
  1058.  
  1059. 236
  1060. 00:11:46,175 --> 00:11:48,343
  1061. - Really? Cool.
  1062. - Yes.
  1063.  
  1064. 237
  1065. 00:11:48,345 --> 00:11:50,678
  1066. We were just bought
  1067. by Wembley Media.
  1068.  
  1069. 238
  1070. 00:11:50,680 --> 00:11:52,647
  1071. - What?
  1072. - Yeah.
  1073.  
  1074. 239
  1075. 00:11:52,649 --> 00:11:53,548
  1076. Are you fucking kidding me?
  1077.  
  1078. 240
  1079. 00:11:53,550 --> 00:11:55,015
  1080. I knew you'd have
  1081. a harsh reaction...
  1082.  
  1083. 241
  1084. 00:11:55,017 --> 00:11:56,184
  1085. A harsh reaction?
  1086.  
  1087. 242
  1088. 00:11:56,186 --> 00:11:57,619
  1089. - Fred, this is a good thing.
  1090. - How?
  1091.  
  1092. 243
  1093. 00:11:57,621 --> 00:11:59,220
  1094. The fucker
  1095. represents everything
  1096.  
  1097. 244
  1098. 00:11:59,222 --> 00:12:00,688
  1099. that we've been fighting
  1100. against since day one!
  1101.  
  1102. 245
  1103. 00:12:00,690 --> 00:12:03,591
  1104. The whole point of this paper is
  1105. to fight giant media conglomerates.
  1106.  
  1107. 246
  1108. 00:12:03,593 --> 00:12:05,393
  1109. Now we've been bought
  1110. by a giant media conglomerate.
  1111.  
  1112. 247
  1113. 00:12:05,395 --> 00:12:07,662
  1114. - I do see the irony.
  1115. - Irony?
  1116.  
  1117. 248
  1118. 00:12:07,664 --> 00:12:10,331
  1119. He's gonna turn this place
  1120. into a propaganda machine.
  1121.  
  1122. 249
  1123. 00:12:10,333 --> 00:12:12,200
  1124. Not the good kind,
  1125. that's right!
  1126.  
  1127. 250
  1128. 00:12:12,202 --> 00:12:14,001
  1129. The bad kind, that's wrong!
  1130.  
  1131. 251
  1132. 00:12:14,003 --> 00:12:15,370
  1133. Well, we're out of options.
  1134.  
  1135. 252
  1136. 00:12:15,372 --> 00:12:17,105
  1137. We've been running
  1138. as long as we can
  1139.  
  1140. 253
  1141. 00:12:17,107 --> 00:12:19,507
  1142. on ads for weed doctors
  1143. and escorts.
  1144.  
  1145. 254
  1146. 00:12:19,509 --> 00:12:21,609
  1147. Let's get penis enlargement
  1148. ads, too.
  1149.  
  1150. 255
  1151. 00:12:21,611 --> 00:12:23,077
  1152. No one likes their dick.
  1153.  
  1154. 256
  1155. 00:12:23,079 --> 00:12:25,046
  1156. - Come on, Fred.
  1157. - This Wembley guy,
  1158.  
  1159. 257
  1160. 00:12:25,048 --> 00:12:27,582
  1161. he ran fake stories
  1162. to help get Chambers elected.
  1163.  
  1164. 258
  1165. 00:12:27,584 --> 00:12:28,550
  1166. No, they couldn't prove that.
  1167.  
  1168. 259
  1169. 00:12:28,552 --> 00:12:30,752
  1170. We proved it! I wrote
  1171. three articles about it!
  1172.  
  1173. 260
  1174. 00:12:30,754 --> 00:12:32,654
  1175. - You published them!
  1176. - I did.
  1177.  
  1178. 261
  1179. 00:12:32,656 --> 00:12:35,356
  1180. The shit that comes out
  1181. of this fucking guy's mouth...
  1182.  
  1183. 262
  1184. 00:12:35,358 --> 00:12:38,059
  1185. He said hurricanes were
  1186. caused by gay marriage.
  1187.  
  1188. 263
  1189. 00:12:38,061 --> 00:12:39,661
  1190. I don't even get
  1191. how that fucking works.
  1192.  
  1193. 264
  1194. 00:12:39,663 --> 00:12:41,262
  1195. I don't even get
  1196. the math on that one.
  1197.  
  1198. 265
  1199. 00:12:41,264 --> 00:12:43,331
  1200. - Fred, it's done, all right?
  1201. - It's done?
  1202.  
  1203. 266
  1204. 00:12:43,333 --> 00:12:46,801
  1205. They're upstairs finalizing
  1206. the deal right now.
  1207.  
  1208. 267
  1209. 00:12:46,803 --> 00:12:49,571
  1210. Look, we have to cut
  1211. two-thirds of our staff.
  1212.  
  1213. 268
  1214. 00:12:49,573 --> 00:12:51,606
  1215. - Two-thirds?
  1216. - Yeah.
  1217.  
  1218. 269
  1219. 00:12:51,608 --> 00:12:54,042
  1220. But we wanna keep you on.
  1221. They wanna keep you on.
  1222.  
  1223. 270
  1224. 00:12:54,044 --> 00:12:55,443
  1225. It's just...
  1226.  
  1227. 271
  1228. 00:12:55,445 --> 00:12:57,345
  1229. You just have to
  1230. tone it down a little bit.
  1231.  
  1232. 272
  1233. 00:12:57,347 --> 00:12:58,814
  1234. I don't know how I can
  1235. tone things down
  1236.  
  1237. 273
  1238. 00:12:58,816 --> 00:13:00,482
  1239. any more than
  1240. I'm toning them down.
  1241.  
  1242. 274
  1243. 00:13:00,484 --> 00:13:02,484
  1244. Okay, Fred.
  1245. You're a great writer.
  1246.  
  1247. 275
  1248. 00:13:02,486 --> 00:13:03,651
  1249. - Thank you.
  1250. - All right, you're funny,
  1251.  
  1252. 276
  1253. 00:13:03,653 --> 00:13:05,353
  1254. you take risks,
  1255. you connect with people.
  1256.  
  1257. 277
  1258. 00:13:05,355 --> 00:13:06,621
  1259. I'm sensing a twist in this.
  1260.  
  1261. 278
  1262. 00:13:06,623 --> 00:13:08,625
  1263. You have a distinct,
  1264. authentic voice, but...
  1265.  
  1266. 279
  1267. 00:13:09,759 --> 00:13:11,626
  1268. Sometimes you're
  1269. a little too much.
  1270.  
  1271. 280
  1272. 00:13:11,628 --> 00:13:12,660
  1273. I don't think I am too much!
  1274.  
  1275. 281
  1276. 00:13:12,662 --> 00:13:15,163
  1277. I actually think I'm
  1278. the perfect right portion.
  1279.  
  1280. 282
  1281. 00:13:15,165 --> 00:13:16,664
  1282. Look, you have your job.
  1283.  
  1284. 283
  1285. 00:13:16,666 --> 00:13:19,501
  1286. Okay, focus on that and just
  1287. toe the line a little bit.
  1288.  
  1289. 284
  1290. 00:13:19,503 --> 00:13:21,102
  1291. You know what? I quit.
  1292.  
  1293. 285
  1294. 00:13:21,104 --> 00:13:22,237
  1295. Oh, come on, Fred.
  1296.  
  1297. 286
  1298. 00:13:22,239 --> 00:13:24,239
  1299. You should quit, too.
  1300. Everyone should fucking quit.
  1301.  
  1302. 287
  1303. 00:13:24,241 --> 00:13:26,174
  1304. No, I'm not gonna quit,
  1305. I need my job.
  1306.  
  1307. 288
  1308. 00:13:26,176 --> 00:13:28,276
  1309. I need my fucking job, too.
  1310. I'm broke, man!
  1311.  
  1312. 289
  1313. 00:13:28,278 --> 00:13:29,678
  1314. But I can't work for that guy.
  1315.  
  1316. 290
  1317. 00:13:29,680 --> 00:13:32,080
  1318. At least let me fire you
  1319. so you can get unemployment.
  1320.  
  1321. 291
  1322. 00:13:32,082 --> 00:13:34,148
  1323. No fucking way!
  1324.  
  1325. 292
  1326. 00:13:34,150 --> 00:13:36,284
  1327. I want him to know
  1328. that I quit.
  1329.  
  1330. 293
  1331. 00:13:36,286 --> 00:13:38,621
  1332. He's never gonna know it,
  1333. he's never heard of you.
  1334.  
  1335. 294
  1336. 00:13:38,623 --> 00:13:41,189
  1337. You're gonna destroy your life to
  1338. spite a guy who's never heard of you?
  1339.  
  1340. 295
  1341. 00:13:41,191 --> 00:13:42,758
  1342. Yes! You said it best!
  1343.  
  1344. 296
  1345. 00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:43,926
  1346. That's exactly
  1347. what I'm doing.
  1348.  
  1349. 297
  1350. 00:13:43,928 --> 00:13:46,729
  1351. You're making bad decisions
  1352. and it's bumming me out, man.
  1353.  
  1354. 298
  1355. 00:13:46,731 --> 00:13:48,196
  1356. Well, that makes
  1357. two of us.
  1358.  
  1359. 299
  1360. 00:13:48,198 --> 00:13:51,767
  1361. Fuck this.
  1362. Journalism died today, people.
  1363.  
  1364. 300
  1365. 00:13:51,769 --> 00:13:54,737
  1366. Yes, hello, this is, uh,
  1367. Fred Flarsky.
  1368.  
  1369. 301
  1370. 00:13:54,739 --> 00:13:56,672
  1371. Um... I, uh,
  1372.  
  1373. 302
  1374. 00:13:56,674 --> 00:13:58,239
  1375. was just calling to say
  1376. that I was forced
  1377.  
  1378. 303
  1379. 00:13:58,241 --> 00:13:59,507
  1380. <i>to quit my job recently,</i>
  1381.  
  1382. 304
  1383. 00:13:59,509 --> 00:14:01,209
  1384. <i>making me
  1385. something of a free agent.</i>
  1386.  
  1387. 305
  1388. 00:14:01,211 --> 00:14:02,778
  1389. <i>And I know in the past, uh,</i>
  1390.  
  1391. 306
  1392. 00:14:02,780 --> 00:14:05,481
  1393. <i>you said I'm not exactly what</i>
  1394. The Times <i>was looking for,</i>
  1395.  
  1396. 307
  1397. 00:14:05,483 --> 00:14:08,149
  1398. <i>but I was just calling
  1399. to see if anything's changed.</i>
  1400.  
  1401. 308
  1402. 00:14:08,151 --> 00:14:10,285
  1403. <i>Uh, just give me a ring.
  1404. Thank you so much.</i>
  1405.  
  1406. 309
  1407. 00:14:10,287 --> 00:14:12,490
  1408. Yo, Lance. It's Fred. Um...
  1409.  
  1410. 310
  1411. 00:14:14,224 --> 00:14:15,524
  1412. I lost my job
  1413. and I'm very sad.
  1414.  
  1415. 311
  1416. 00:14:15,526 --> 00:14:17,125
  1417. Can I come by?
  1418.  
  1419. 312
  1420. 00:14:22,466 --> 00:14:23,732
  1421. We need to
  1422. schedule a meeting
  1423.  
  1424. 313
  1425. 00:14:23,734 --> 00:14:25,734
  1426. and see what they have to say.
  1427.  
  1428. 314
  1429. 00:14:25,736 --> 00:14:27,270
  1430. Excuse me.
  1431.  
  1432. 315
  1433. 00:14:28,439 --> 00:14:31,239
  1434. Man, I can't believe
  1435. they did you like that.
  1436.  
  1437. 316
  1438. 00:14:31,241 --> 00:14:32,875
  1439. It's fucked up. I'm pissed.
  1440.  
  1441. 317
  1442. 00:14:32,877 --> 00:14:34,810
  1443. But you're gonna feel a lot
  1444. better, man, we're leaving.
  1445.  
  1446. 318
  1447. 00:14:34,812 --> 00:14:36,512
  1448. You can leave work right now?
  1449.  
  1450. 319
  1451. 00:14:36,514 --> 00:14:38,581
  1452. Yeah, I can fucking leave.
  1453. You see this corner office?
  1454.  
  1455. 320
  1456. 00:14:38,583 --> 00:14:39,848
  1457. That's a
  1458. "I can leave this bitch
  1459.  
  1460. 321
  1461. 00:14:39,850 --> 00:14:41,817
  1462. "whenever I want"
  1463. corner office.
  1464.  
  1465. 322
  1466. 00:14:41,819 --> 00:14:43,354
  1467. Come on, man. Everybody!
  1468.  
  1469. 323
  1470. 00:14:44,522 --> 00:14:46,254
  1471. This is my best friend,
  1472.  
  1473. 324
  1474. 00:14:46,256 --> 00:14:47,790
  1475. and he just
  1476. lost his job today.
  1477.  
  1478. 325
  1479. 00:14:47,792 --> 00:14:49,658
  1480. All right?
  1481. He's at rock bottom.
  1482.  
  1483. 326
  1484. 00:14:49,660 --> 00:14:51,860
  1485. - It's not that bad.
  1486. - He feels like shit.
  1487.  
  1488. 327
  1489. 00:14:51,862 --> 00:14:53,529
  1490. And I'm gonna
  1491. make him feel better.
  1492.  
  1493. 328
  1494. 00:14:53,531 --> 00:14:55,229
  1495. It's been a tradition
  1496. since we were in college,
  1497.  
  1498. 329
  1499. 00:14:55,231 --> 00:14:56,599
  1500. when one of us feels sad,
  1501.  
  1502. 330
  1503. 00:14:56,601 --> 00:14:58,334
  1504. the other one
  1505. has to get him fucked up.
  1506.  
  1507. 331
  1508. 00:14:58,336 --> 00:15:02,504
  1509. I'm talking Britney Spears,
  1510. mid-2000s bald head,
  1511.  
  1512. 332
  1513. 00:15:02,506 --> 00:15:04,773
  1514. almost dropping the baby
  1515. fucked up.
  1516.  
  1517. 333
  1518. 00:15:04,775 --> 00:15:06,875
  1519. No judgement. No judgement.
  1520.  
  1521. 334
  1522. 00:15:06,877 --> 00:15:09,244
  1523. I need my schedule cleared,
  1524. Zander.
  1525.  
  1526. 335
  1527. 00:15:09,246 --> 00:15:10,346
  1528. I don't want to do shit.
  1529.  
  1530. 336
  1531. 00:15:10,348 --> 00:15:12,581
  1532. I'm going off-grid
  1533. till tomorrow.
  1534.  
  1535. 337
  1536. 00:15:12,583 --> 00:15:13,651
  1537. Matter of fact...
  1538.  
  1539. 338
  1540. 00:15:14,752 --> 00:15:16,685
  1541. Everybody's got the day off.
  1542.  
  1543. 339
  1544. 00:15:16,687 --> 00:15:19,188
  1545. Everybody's got the day off.
  1546. Y'all got the day off.
  1547.  
  1548. 340
  1549. 00:15:19,190 --> 00:15:20,289
  1550. Everybody, go home.
  1551.  
  1552. 341
  1553. 00:15:20,291 --> 00:15:22,958
  1554. I'm so appreciative
  1555. of all of you guys' hard work.
  1556.  
  1557. 342
  1558. 00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:24,693
  1559. I love
  1560. every single one of you.
  1561.  
  1562. 343
  1563. 00:15:24,695 --> 00:15:25,761
  1564. Except you, Ted!
  1565.  
  1566. 344
  1567. 00:15:25,763 --> 00:15:28,864
  1568. Bagel Friday
  1569. is for everybody, Ted!
  1570.  
  1571. 345
  1572. 00:15:28,866 --> 00:15:30,966
  1573. You don't think we know
  1574. you taking the bagels?
  1575.  
  1576. 346
  1577. 00:15:30,968 --> 00:15:32,334
  1578. Yeah, Ted, not cool.
  1579.  
  1580. 347
  1581. 00:15:32,336 --> 00:15:33,268
  1582. - Zander.
  1583. - Yeah?
  1584.  
  1585. 348
  1586. 00:15:33,270 --> 00:15:35,504
  1587. I need two cans
  1588. of the Pamplemousse LaCroix.
  1589.  
  1590. 349
  1591. 00:15:35,506 --> 00:15:36,739
  1592. - Uh-huh.
  1593. - I need that filled
  1594.  
  1595. 350
  1596. 00:15:36,741 --> 00:15:39,274
  1597. with Johnnie Walker Blue
  1598. and CBD oil.
  1599.  
  1600. 351
  1601. 00:15:39,276 --> 00:15:40,444
  1602. Do you want one?
  1603.  
  1604. 352
  1605. 00:15:41,812 --> 00:15:43,479
  1606. I got fucked, man.
  1607.  
  1608. 353
  1609. 00:15:43,481 --> 00:15:46,215
  1610. Yeah, you got fucked
  1611. like a stepmom on Pornhub.
  1612.  
  1613. 354
  1614. 00:15:46,217 --> 00:15:47,383
  1615. Well, it happens to everybody.
  1616.  
  1617. 355
  1618. 00:15:47,385 --> 00:15:49,318
  1619. I've been unemployed before,
  1620. it sucks.
  1621.  
  1622. 356
  1623. 00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:50,586
  1624. But I didn't ask
  1625. for any handouts.
  1626.  
  1627. 357
  1628. 00:15:50,588 --> 00:15:53,389
  1629. I picked myself up by
  1630. my bootstraps and got to it.
  1631.  
  1632. 358
  1633. 00:15:53,391 --> 00:15:54,823
  1634. Where are we going right now?
  1635.  
  1636. 359
  1637. 00:15:54,825 --> 00:15:56,625
  1638. Best day ever, Fred.
  1639. Don't worry about it.
  1640.  
  1641. 360
  1642. 00:15:56,627 --> 00:15:58,794
  1643. I've got this dope afternoon
  1644. planned for us.
  1645.  
  1646. 361
  1647. 00:15:58,796 --> 00:16:00,596
  1648. First we're going to finish
  1649. these Pamplemousse's.
  1650.  
  1651. 362
  1652. 00:16:00,598 --> 00:16:01,563
  1653. Play at the park.
  1654.  
  1655. 363
  1656. 00:16:01,565 --> 00:16:03,599
  1657. After that we're going to
  1658. go to Peter Luger's,
  1659.  
  1660. 364
  1661. 00:16:03,601 --> 00:16:04,767
  1662. get you a nice fat steak,
  1663.  
  1664. 365
  1665. 00:16:04,769 --> 00:16:07,469
  1666. and then finish it off with
  1667. a World Wildlife Fund benefit.
  1668.  
  1669. 366
  1670. 00:16:07,471 --> 00:16:08,837
  1671. I don't know if I
  1672. want to go to some
  1673.  
  1674. 367
  1675. 00:16:08,839 --> 00:16:10,406
  1676. fancy rich person party.
  1677.  
  1678. 368
  1679. 00:16:10,408 --> 00:16:11,740
  1680. What... Oh, come on, man,
  1681.  
  1682. 369
  1683. 00:16:11,742 --> 00:16:13,342
  1684. don't be so judgmental,
  1685. all right?
  1686.  
  1687. 370
  1688. 00:16:13,344 --> 00:16:15,744
  1689. It's free booze and
  1690. there'll be pandas and shit.
  1691.  
  1692. 371
  1693. 00:16:15,746 --> 00:16:18,280
  1694. - People love pandas and shit.
  1695. - I don't know.
  1696.  
  1697. 372
  1698. 00:16:18,282 --> 00:16:19,515
  1699. All right, fine, Fred.
  1700.  
  1701. 373
  1702. 00:16:19,517 --> 00:16:20,917
  1703. Then just do nothing.
  1704. All right?
  1705.  
  1706. 374
  1707. 00:16:20,919 --> 00:16:22,852
  1708. Go home, do nothing.
  1709.  
  1710. 375
  1711. 00:16:22,854 --> 00:16:25,423
  1712. And don't kick it with your
  1713. best friend and Boyz II Men.
  1714.  
  1715. 376
  1716. 00:16:26,557 --> 00:16:27,791
  1717. Say what?
  1718.  
  1719. 377
  1720. 00:16:27,793 --> 00:16:29,525
  1721. Oh, yeah.
  1722.  
  1723. 378
  1724. 00:16:29,527 --> 00:16:30,994
  1725. Boyz II Men is bringing
  1726. their timeless blend
  1727.  
  1728. 379
  1729. 00:16:30,996 --> 00:16:34,263
  1730. of R&B, hip-hop and
  1731. new jack swing to the party.
  1732.  
  1733. 380
  1734. 00:16:34,265 --> 00:16:36,265
  1735. I thought you would
  1736. like to be there.
  1737.  
  1738. 381
  1739. 00:16:36,267 --> 00:16:37,967
  1740. Bo-bo-bo-Boyz II Men?
  1741.  
  1742. 382
  1743. 00:16:37,969 --> 00:16:41,037
  1744. <i>♪ Motownphilly's back again</i>
  1745.  
  1746. 383
  1747. 00:16:42,140 --> 00:16:43,039
  1748. That's what I'm talking about,
  1749. man. Let's do this shit.
  1750.  
  1751. 384
  1752. 00:16:43,041 --> 00:16:45,008
  1753. Okay, let's have fun.
  1754. What a fun day.
  1755.  
  1756. 385
  1757. 00:16:46,978 --> 00:16:50,612
  1758. I am so hungry,
  1759. it's insane.
  1760.  
  1761. 386
  1762. 00:16:50,614 --> 00:16:51,848
  1763. Why didn't you
  1764. PowerBar me?
  1765.  
  1766. 387
  1767. 00:16:51,850 --> 00:16:53,348
  1768. I tried,
  1769. you pushed my hand away.
  1770.  
  1771. 388
  1772. 00:16:53,350 --> 00:16:54,516
  1773. Oh.
  1774.  
  1775. 389
  1776. 00:16:54,518 --> 00:16:57,519
  1777. Skewered foods. I can't eat
  1778. skewered foods gracefully.
  1779.  
  1780. 390
  1781. 00:16:57,521 --> 00:16:58,922
  1782. I look like
  1783. a fucking caveman.
  1784.  
  1785. 391
  1786. 00:16:58,924 --> 00:17:00,690
  1787. Yeah, and there are
  1788. cameras everywhere.
  1789.  
  1790. 392
  1791. 00:17:00,692 --> 00:17:02,524
  1792. That's really gonna hurt
  1793. your elegance score.
  1794.  
  1795. 393
  1796. 00:17:02,526 --> 00:17:03,595
  1797. That's my best score.
  1798.  
  1799. 394
  1800. 00:17:07,999 --> 00:17:09,933
  1801. Fuck! It's all
  1802. skewered foods.
  1803.  
  1804. 395
  1805. 00:17:09,935 --> 00:17:11,601
  1806. I'm gonna take the chicken
  1807. off the skewers.
  1808.  
  1809. 396
  1810. 00:17:11,603 --> 00:17:13,535
  1811. - Take it off...
  1812. - Quickly. Quickly.
  1813.  
  1814. 397
  1815. 00:17:13,537 --> 00:17:15,504
  1816. Why do they make this
  1817. so difficult...
  1818.  
  1819. 398
  1820. 00:17:15,506 --> 00:17:17,841
  1821. Oh. I'm sorry, sir.
  1822. I apologize.
  1823.  
  1824. 399
  1825. 00:17:17,843 --> 00:17:20,409
  1826. - Jesus fucking Christ.
  1827. - Can't do things...
  1828.  
  1829. 400
  1830. 00:17:20,411 --> 00:17:22,377
  1831. Just make a fucking...
  1832. Make a wall. Make a wall.
  1833.  
  1834. 401
  1835. 00:17:22,379 --> 00:17:24,248
  1836. - Yup. Yes.
  1837. - Do you have it?
  1838.  
  1839. 402
  1840. 00:17:27,418 --> 00:17:29,018
  1841. Good. Good, good,
  1842. good, good.
  1843.  
  1844. 403
  1845. 00:17:29,020 --> 00:17:30,822
  1846. Oh, my God,
  1847. it's really good chicken.
  1848.  
  1849. 404
  1850. 00:17:32,457 --> 00:17:34,023
  1851. James Steward is approaching.
  1852. James Steward is approaching.
  1853.  
  1854. 405
  1855. 00:17:34,025 --> 00:17:35,091
  1856. What?
  1857.  
  1858. 406
  1859. 00:17:35,093 --> 00:17:36,860
  1860. Okay, he's about
  1861. nine feet away.
  1862.  
  1863. 407
  1864. 00:17:36,862 --> 00:17:38,895
  1865. His dick is probably
  1866. about seven feet away.
  1867.  
  1868. 408
  1869. 00:17:38,897 --> 00:17:40,663
  1870. - Maggie!
  1871. - Six feet away.
  1872.  
  1873. 409
  1874. 00:17:40,665 --> 00:17:42,534
  1875. Five feet away.
  1876. Spit, spit, spit, spit, spit.
  1877.  
  1878. 410
  1879. 00:17:43,902 --> 00:17:45,935
  1880. - James!
  1881. - <i>Bonsoir.</i>
  1882.  
  1883. 411
  1884. 00:17:45,937 --> 00:17:47,771
  1885. - Hi.
  1886. - Good evening.
  1887.  
  1888. 412
  1889. 00:17:47,773 --> 00:17:49,439
  1890. I am so sorry I missed you
  1891.  
  1892. 413
  1893. 00:17:49,441 --> 00:17:51,107
  1894. when I was at the White House
  1895. a few weeks ago.
  1896.  
  1897. 414
  1898. 00:17:51,109 --> 00:17:54,043
  1899. Oh, are you so "sorry," James?
  1900.  
  1901. 415
  1902. 00:17:54,045 --> 00:17:55,578
  1903. You're never gonna
  1904.  
  1905. 416
  1906. 00:17:55,580 --> 00:17:56,913
  1907. stop making that joke,
  1908. are you?
  1909.  
  1910. 417
  1911. 00:17:56,915 --> 00:17:59,048
  1912. No. I'm not.
  1913.  
  1914. 418
  1915. 00:17:59,050 --> 00:18:00,517
  1916. Well, I... Oh, hello.
  1917.  
  1918. 419
  1919. 00:18:00,519 --> 00:18:01,818
  1920. - Hi.
  1921. - Oh, yes.
  1922.  
  1923. 420
  1924. 00:18:01,820 --> 00:18:03,622
  1925. Thank you.
  1926.  
  1927. 421
  1928. 00:18:04,990 --> 00:18:07,025
  1929. - One more. One more.
  1930. - One more.
  1931.  
  1932. 422
  1933. 00:18:08,126 --> 00:18:10,493
  1934. <i>Merci.</i> Thank you.
  1935.  
  1936. 423
  1937. 00:18:10,495 --> 00:18:11,663
  1938. What do you say
  1939. we get out of here?
  1940.  
  1941. 424
  1942. 00:18:13,031 --> 00:18:15,799
  1943. Grab a drink somewhere
  1944. a bit more private.
  1945.  
  1946. 425
  1947. 00:18:17,936 --> 00:18:19,135
  1948. - Yes...
  1949. - Yeah?
  1950.  
  1951. 426
  1952. 00:18:19,137 --> 00:18:21,404
  1953. Oh, my God!
  1954.  
  1955. 427
  1956. 00:18:21,406 --> 00:18:23,139
  1957. <i>Make some noise out there!
  1958. Make some noise!</i>
  1959.  
  1960. 428
  1961. 00:18:23,141 --> 00:18:25,441
  1962. <i>Yeah! Check it out, y'all!</i>
  1963.  
  1964. 429
  1965. 00:18:25,443 --> 00:18:27,577
  1966. <i>One question,
  1967. what's the name of the group?</i>
  1968.  
  1969. 430
  1970. 00:18:27,579 --> 00:18:28,845
  1971. Boyz II Men!
  1972.  
  1973. 431
  1974. 00:18:28,847 --> 00:18:29,712
  1975. <i>What's the name
  1976. of the group, y'all?</i>
  1977.  
  1978. 432
  1979. 00:18:29,714 --> 00:18:31,047
  1980. Boyz II Men!
  1981.  
  1982. 433
  1983. 00:18:52,938 --> 00:18:54,003
  1984. Yeah...
  1985.  
  1986. 434
  1987. 00:18:54,005 --> 00:18:55,039
  1988. I told you this
  1989. would be dope.
  1990.  
  1991. 435
  1992. 00:18:55,041 --> 00:18:58,108
  1993. Yeah, uh...
  1994. This is really cheering me up.
  1995.  
  1996. 436
  1997. 00:18:58,110 --> 00:18:59,542
  1998. Wow.
  1999.  
  2000. 437
  2001. 00:19:09,155 --> 00:19:10,587
  2002. I'm super underdressed.
  2003.  
  2004. 438
  2005. 00:19:10,589 --> 00:19:11,888
  2006. Stop complaining,
  2007. all right?
  2008.  
  2009. 439
  2010. 00:19:11,890 --> 00:19:13,823
  2011. You think
  2012. you feel outta place?
  2013.  
  2014. 440
  2015. 00:19:13,825 --> 00:19:14,992
  2016. This is one of
  2017. the brightest rooms
  2018.  
  2019. 441
  2020. 00:19:14,994 --> 00:19:17,027
  2021. I've ever been in,
  2022. in my life.
  2023.  
  2024. 442
  2025. 00:19:17,029 --> 00:19:18,830
  2026. Bright?
  2027. What do you mean, bright?
  2028.  
  2029. 443
  2030. 00:19:19,431 --> 00:19:20,663
  2031. Like white.
  2032.  
  2033. 444
  2034. 00:19:20,665 --> 00:19:22,732
  2035. - Oh, "bright" is white?
  2036. - Yeah, man.
  2037.  
  2038. 445
  2039. 00:19:22,734 --> 00:19:24,801
  2040. It's only me,
  2041. the waiters and Boyz II Men.
  2042.  
  2043. 446
  2044. 00:19:24,803 --> 00:19:26,669
  2045. I've already had three people
  2046. tell me they love my music.
  2047.  
  2048. 447
  2049. 00:19:32,611 --> 00:19:33,844
  2050. Duty calls.
  2051.  
  2052. 448
  2053. 00:19:33,846 --> 00:19:36,213
  2054. I'll take a snow check
  2055. on that dance.
  2056.  
  2057. 449
  2058. 00:19:36,215 --> 00:19:38,815
  2059. - Canadian for "rain check."
  2060. - Okay.
  2061.  
  2062. 450
  2063. 00:19:38,817 --> 00:19:40,853
  2064. Okay.
  2065.  
  2066. 451
  2067. 00:19:47,827 --> 00:19:49,960
  2068. Man, you're pounding 'em
  2069. kinda hard, don't you think?
  2070.  
  2071. 452
  2072. 00:19:49,962 --> 00:19:52,029
  2073. I got fired today, man.
  2074.  
  2075. 453
  2076. 00:19:52,031 --> 00:19:53,398
  2077. You told me you quit.
  2078.  
  2079. 454
  2080. 00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:56,901
  2081. I was forced to quit
  2082. because of...
  2083.  
  2084. 455
  2085. 00:19:56,903 --> 00:19:58,035
  2086. Yeah, okay, man.
  2087.  
  2088. 456
  2089. 00:19:58,037 --> 00:19:59,404
  2090. Lie to me some more.
  2091.  
  2092. 457
  2093. 00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:02,507
  2094. You good?
  2095.  
  2096. 458
  2097. 00:20:07,780 --> 00:20:09,949
  2098. Shit. Is the secretary
  2099. of state looking at us?
  2100.  
  2101. 459
  2102. 00:20:11,884 --> 00:20:13,085
  2103. Oh, she's looking at you?
  2104.  
  2105. 460
  2106. 00:20:15,087 --> 00:20:16,454
  2107. Fred.
  2108.  
  2109. 461
  2110. 00:20:19,591 --> 00:20:21,727
  2111. Fred. What the hell?
  2112. What was that?
  2113.  
  2114. 462
  2115. 00:20:22,762 --> 00:20:24,630
  2116. Damn. Hey, what was that?
  2117.  
  2118. 463
  2119. 00:20:25,898 --> 00:20:27,497
  2120. I...
  2121.  
  2122. 464
  2123. 00:20:27,499 --> 00:20:28,899
  2124. Kinda... I kinda know her.
  2125. Okay?
  2126.  
  2127. 465
  2128. 00:20:28,901 --> 00:20:30,834
  2129. - You kinda know her?
  2130. - Yeah.
  2131.  
  2132. 466
  2133. 00:20:30,836 --> 00:20:32,569
  2134. Nobody kinda knows
  2135. Charlotte Field, all right?
  2136.  
  2137. 467
  2138. 00:20:32,571 --> 00:20:33,971
  2139. It's like kinda knowing
  2140. a mermaid, dude.
  2141.  
  2142. 468
  2143. 00:20:33,973 --> 00:20:35,105
  2144. You tell people that shit.
  2145.  
  2146. 469
  2147. 00:20:35,107 --> 00:20:36,774
  2148. - That's exceptional.
  2149. - Okay.
  2150.  
  2151. 470
  2152. 00:20:36,776 --> 00:20:38,075
  2153. I'll tell you a story.
  2154.  
  2155. 471
  2156. 00:20:38,077 --> 00:20:41,812
  2157. So, I'm like 13,
  2158. she's like 16.
  2159.  
  2160. 472
  2161. 00:20:41,814 --> 00:20:43,149
  2162. She's my babysitter.
  2163.  
  2164. 473
  2165. 00:20:48,721 --> 00:20:51,255
  2166. <i>She's like, perfect.
  2167. She's very nice to me,</i>
  2168.  
  2169. 474
  2170. 00:20:51,257 --> 00:20:52,790
  2171. <i>which goes a long way with me.</i>
  2172.  
  2173. 475
  2174. 00:20:52,792 --> 00:20:54,224
  2175. So, we're at her house...
  2176.  
  2177. 476
  2178. 00:20:54,226 --> 00:20:56,160
  2179. She's practicing a speech
  2180. that she's writing.
  2181.  
  2182. 477
  2183. 00:20:56,162 --> 00:20:58,128
  2184. <i>She's running for
  2185. Student Council president.</i>
  2186.  
  2187. 478
  2188. 00:20:58,130 --> 00:20:59,431
  2189. Did you know
  2190. that every year,
  2191.  
  2192. 479
  2193. 00:20:59,433 --> 00:21:02,266
  2194. the school throws away over
  2195. 500 tons of recyclable garbage?
  2196.  
  2197. 480
  2198. 00:21:02,268 --> 00:21:05,102
  2199. - And no one cares.
  2200. - I know, it's total bullshit.
  2201.  
  2202. 481
  2203. 00:21:05,104 --> 00:21:06,704
  2204. But how do you get idiots
  2205. to care about shit
  2206.  
  2207. 482
  2208. 00:21:06,706 --> 00:21:09,807
  2209. - they don't care about?
  2210. - They'll just care
  2211.  
  2212. 483
  2213. 00:21:09,809 --> 00:21:11,842
  2214. because it's the right thing
  2215. to care about.
  2216.  
  2217. 484
  2218. 00:21:11,844 --> 00:21:14,845
  2219. You're more inspiring than George
  2220. Bush and Dan Quayle combined.
  2221.  
  2222. 485
  2223. 00:21:14,847 --> 00:21:16,613
  2224. Well, that's not too hard.
  2225.  
  2226. 486
  2227. 00:21:18,050 --> 00:21:19,783
  2228. <i>Well, she was amazing,
  2229. and she was smart,</i>
  2230.  
  2231. 487
  2232. 00:21:19,785 --> 00:21:21,118
  2233. <i>and she seemed to
  2234. kinda like me,</i>
  2235.  
  2236. 488
  2237. 00:21:21,120 --> 00:21:22,886
  2238. <i>and I felt like
  2239. we were having a moment.</i>
  2240.  
  2241. 489
  2242. 00:21:22,888 --> 00:21:25,055
  2243. You know what I mean?
  2244. Like a romantic moment.
  2245.  
  2246. 490
  2247. 00:21:25,057 --> 00:21:26,123
  2248. Oh, shit.
  2249.  
  2250. 491
  2251. 00:21:26,125 --> 00:21:27,725
  2252. <i>So I did something,</i>
  2253.  
  2254. 492
  2255. 00:21:27,727 --> 00:21:29,827
  2256. <i>that in retrospect
  2257. was highly inappropriate.</i>
  2258.  
  2259. 493
  2260. 00:21:29,829 --> 00:21:31,130
  2261. <i>I kissed her.</i>
  2262.  
  2263. 494
  2264. 00:21:31,797 --> 00:21:33,130
  2265. I looked down...
  2266.  
  2267. 495
  2268. 00:21:33,132 --> 00:21:35,300
  2269. <i>I got a fucking
  2270. 13-year-old boner, man!</i>
  2271.  
  2272. 496
  2273. 00:21:35,302 --> 00:21:38,135
  2274. - Oh!
  2275. - Hard... But not big.
  2276.  
  2277. 497
  2278. 00:21:38,137 --> 00:21:40,938
  2279. But hard. And pronounced,
  2280. "13-year-old boner."
  2281.  
  2282. 498
  2283. 00:21:40,940 --> 00:21:41,939
  2284. Sorry.
  2285.  
  2286. 499
  2287. 00:21:41,941 --> 00:21:43,909
  2288. And she looks at it.
  2289. She sees it. And she goes...
  2290.  
  2291. 500
  2292. 00:21:44,677 --> 00:21:45,743
  2293. It's okay.
  2294.  
  2295. 501
  2296. 00:21:45,745 --> 00:21:47,245
  2297. And then,
  2298.  
  2299. 502
  2300. 00:21:47,247 --> 00:21:49,113
  2301. her boyfriend comes
  2302. into the room,
  2303.  
  2304. 503
  2305. 00:21:49,115 --> 00:21:50,814
  2306. who was in the other room
  2307. watching <i>Blossom!</i>
  2308.  
  2309. 504
  2310. 00:21:50,816 --> 00:21:51,882
  2311. Hey, babe.
  2312.  
  2313. 505
  2314. 00:21:51,884 --> 00:21:53,751
  2315. Points out my fucking
  2316. little boner.
  2317.  
  2318. 506
  2319. 00:21:53,753 --> 00:21:56,154
  2320. - <i>He makes a joke!</i>
  2321. - Whoa!
  2322.  
  2323. 507
  2324. 00:21:56,156 --> 00:21:57,690
  2325. <i>And they left.</i>
  2326.  
  2327. 508
  2328. 00:21:58,325 --> 00:21:59,859
  2329. I'm sorry.
  2330.  
  2331. 509
  2332. 00:22:01,894 --> 00:22:04,964
  2333. And I'm left
  2334. standing there alone...
  2335.  
  2336. 510
  2337. 00:22:05,798 --> 00:22:06,764
  2338. ...in the kitchen,
  2339.  
  2340. 511
  2341. 00:22:06,766 --> 00:22:09,767
  2342. with my little, hard
  2343. 13-year-old fucking boner.
  2344.  
  2345. 512
  2346. 00:22:09,769 --> 00:22:11,935
  2347. - Hard as a rock.
  2348. - And on top of that,
  2349.  
  2350. 513
  2351. 00:22:11,937 --> 00:22:13,604
  2352. she didn't win
  2353. the fucking election.
  2354.  
  2355. 514
  2356. 00:22:13,606 --> 00:22:16,307
  2357. Bill Sterling won because
  2358. he ran on a two-prom platform.
  2359.  
  2360. 515
  2361. 00:22:16,309 --> 00:22:19,344
  2362. - Two-prom!
  2363. - Two-proms! Back-to-back!
  2364.  
  2365. 516
  2366. 00:22:19,346 --> 00:22:21,712
  2367. She didn't stand
  2368. a fucking chance.
  2369.  
  2370. 517
  2371. 00:22:21,714 --> 00:22:22,846
  2372. No, man.
  2373.  
  2374. 518
  2375. 00:22:22,848 --> 00:22:24,882
  2376. I think you're skimming over
  2377. the best part of that story.
  2378.  
  2379. 519
  2380. 00:22:24,884 --> 00:22:26,617
  2381. What's the best part
  2382. of that story?
  2383.  
  2384. 520
  2385. 00:22:26,619 --> 00:22:28,386
  2386. She says your boner was okay.
  2387.  
  2388. 521
  2389. 00:22:28,388 --> 00:22:30,188
  2390. She said, "It's okay,"
  2391. like she was trying
  2392.  
  2393. 522
  2394. 00:22:30,190 --> 00:22:32,023
  2395. to not make me
  2396. fucking feel bad.
  2397.  
  2398. 523
  2399. 00:22:32,025 --> 00:22:34,025
  2400. Fred, you see
  2401. a fucked-up story,
  2402.  
  2403. 524
  2404. 00:22:34,027 --> 00:22:37,761
  2405. when I see a beautiful story
  2406. about a girl that you liked,
  2407.  
  2408. 525
  2409. 00:22:37,763 --> 00:22:40,898
  2410. liking your boner
  2411. in all of its okay-ness.
  2412.  
  2413. 526
  2414. 00:22:40,900 --> 00:22:42,967
  2415. You need
  2416. to talk to her tonight.
  2417.  
  2418. 527
  2419. 00:22:42,969 --> 00:22:44,235
  2420. She probably doesn't remember
  2421. who I am,
  2422.  
  2423. 528
  2424. 00:22:44,237 --> 00:22:45,937
  2425. and if she does remember
  2426. who I am,
  2427.  
  2428. 529
  2429. 00:22:45,939 --> 00:22:47,105
  2430. the last thing she wants is
  2431.  
  2432. 530
  2433. 00:22:47,107 --> 00:22:49,207
  2434. my 13-year-old-boner-having
  2435. fucking ass walking up to her.
  2436.  
  2437. 531
  2438. 00:22:49,209 --> 00:22:50,275
  2439. - Look...
  2440. - Excuse me.
  2441.  
  2442. 532
  2443. 00:22:50,277 --> 00:22:51,309
  2444. Whoa.
  2445.  
  2446. 533
  2447. 00:22:51,311 --> 00:22:52,977
  2448. Secretary Field would
  2449. like to speak with you.
  2450.  
  2451. 534
  2452. 00:22:52,979 --> 00:22:54,212
  2453. With me?
  2454.  
  2455. 535
  2456. 00:22:54,214 --> 00:22:55,646
  2457. With him, right?
  2458.  
  2459. 536
  2460. 00:22:55,648 --> 00:22:57,415
  2461. - Yeah.
  2462. - Right now?
  2463.  
  2464. 537
  2465. 00:22:57,417 --> 00:22:59,017
  2466. Uh, do you know why?
  2467.  
  2468. 538
  2469. 00:22:59,019 --> 00:23:00,120
  2470. This way.
  2471.  
  2472. 539
  2473. 00:23:01,221 --> 00:23:02,387
  2474. This is good.
  2475.  
  2476. 540
  2477. 00:23:02,389 --> 00:23:03,822
  2478. What are you
  2479. nervous about?
  2480.  
  2481. 541
  2482. 00:23:03,824 --> 00:23:06,091
  2483. What the fuck?
  2484. Everything I just said!
  2485.  
  2486. 542
  2487. 00:23:15,734 --> 00:23:17,701
  2488. Oh, my God, dude,
  2489. there she is.
  2490.  
  2491. 543
  2492. 00:23:26,246 --> 00:23:28,079
  2493. What are you gonna
  2494. say to her?
  2495.  
  2496. 544
  2497. 00:23:28,081 --> 00:23:29,681
  2498. I don't know.
  2499.  
  2500. 545
  2501. 00:23:29,683 --> 00:23:31,049
  2502. Should open with a neg.
  2503.  
  2504. 546
  2505. 00:23:31,051 --> 00:23:32,350
  2506. Tell her she's too tall.
  2507.  
  2508. 547
  2509. 00:23:32,352 --> 00:23:34,252
  2510. I'm not gonna neg
  2511. the secretary of state.
  2512.  
  2513. 548
  2514. 00:23:34,254 --> 00:23:36,189
  2515. - It was so nice to see you.
  2516. - You as well.
  2517.  
  2518. 549
  2519. 00:23:38,325 --> 00:23:41,126
  2520. Give me the signal
  2521. when you need me.
  2522.  
  2523. 550
  2524. 00:23:41,128 --> 00:23:43,261
  2525. - Hi.
  2526. - Hi.
  2527.  
  2528. 551
  2529. 00:23:43,263 --> 00:23:44,696
  2530. A man brought me here.
  2531.  
  2532. 552
  2533. 00:23:44,698 --> 00:23:46,231
  2534. Yes, sorry about that.
  2535.  
  2536. 553
  2537. 00:23:46,233 --> 00:23:47,265
  2538. - Um...
  2539. - No, not at all.
  2540.  
  2541. 554
  2542. 00:23:47,267 --> 00:23:50,135
  2543. I can't shake this feeling
  2544. that we know each other.
  2545.  
  2546. 555
  2547. 00:23:50,137 --> 00:23:51,769
  2548. - We do. Yeah.
  2549. - We do?
  2550.  
  2551. 556
  2552. 00:23:51,771 --> 00:23:53,171
  2553. - We do know each other.
  2554. - Okay, so I'm not crazy.
  2555.  
  2556. 557
  2557. 00:23:53,173 --> 00:23:55,473
  2558. - Uh, I'm Fred.
  2559. - Fred...
  2560.  
  2561. 558
  2562. 00:23:55,475 --> 00:23:56,774
  2563. I was shorter,
  2564.  
  2565. 559
  2566. 00:23:56,776 --> 00:23:58,209
  2567. - but other than that...
  2568. - Flarsky?
  2569.  
  2570. 560
  2571. 00:23:58,211 --> 00:23:59,277
  2572. Yeah! Holy fuck!
  2573.  
  2574. 561
  2575. 00:23:59,279 --> 00:24:00,979
  2576. I can't believe it.
  2577. You remember.
  2578.  
  2579. 562
  2580. 00:24:00,981 --> 00:24:03,248
  2581. Oh, my God,
  2582. look at you!
  2583.  
  2584. 563
  2585. 00:24:03,250 --> 00:24:04,449
  2586. Look at me, yes.
  2587.  
  2588. 564
  2589. 00:24:04,451 --> 00:24:05,717
  2590. What are you doing here?
  2591.  
  2592. 565
  2593. 00:24:05,719 --> 00:24:08,219
  2594. My friend, Lance...
  2595. That's Lance.
  2596.  
  2597. 566
  2598. 00:24:08,221 --> 00:24:09,254
  2599. Hey, how you doing?
  2600.  
  2601. 567
  2602. 00:24:09,256 --> 00:24:11,923
  2603. He, uh, he just brought me
  2604. here to see Boyz II Men.
  2605.  
  2606. 568
  2607. 00:24:11,925 --> 00:24:13,057
  2608. I just met them.
  2609.  
  2610. 569
  2611. 00:24:13,059 --> 00:24:14,893
  2612. - You met the Men?
  2613. - Yeah.
  2614.  
  2615. 570
  2616. 00:24:14,895 --> 00:24:16,495
  2617. - What was it like?
  2618. - Don't tell anybody,
  2619.  
  2620. 571
  2621. 00:24:16,497 --> 00:24:17,996
  2622. but it was
  2623. the highlight of my life.
  2624.  
  2625. 572
  2626. 00:24:17,998 --> 00:24:19,130
  2627. Oh, I totally get that.
  2628.  
  2629. 573
  2630. 00:24:19,132 --> 00:24:20,131
  2631. And I've met
  2632. the Dalai Lama.
  2633.  
  2634. 574
  2635. 00:24:20,133 --> 00:24:22,800
  2636. Fuck him. How many hits
  2637. does he have? None.
  2638.  
  2639. 575
  2640. 00:24:22,802 --> 00:24:24,736
  2641. Don't actually fuck him.
  2642.  
  2643. 576
  2644. 00:24:24,738 --> 00:24:25,870
  2645. - He's a wonderful man.
  2646. - Yeah.
  2647.  
  2648. 577
  2649. 00:24:25,872 --> 00:24:27,305
  2650. What are you doing
  2651. these days?
  2652.  
  2653. 578
  2654. 00:24:27,307 --> 00:24:29,176
  2655. I bet it's
  2656. something amazing.
  2657.  
  2658. 579
  2659. 00:24:30,911 --> 00:24:32,177
  2660. - It's pretty amazing.
  2661. - Yeah.
  2662.  
  2663. 580
  2664. 00:24:32,179 --> 00:24:33,244
  2665. Uh, yeah,
  2666.  
  2667. 581
  2668. 00:24:33,246 --> 00:24:35,847
  2669. but it's still in its, uh,
  2670. gestation period, I guess.
  2671.  
  2672. 582
  2673. 00:24:35,849 --> 00:24:37,015
  2674. I don't need to get into it.
  2675.  
  2676. 583
  2677. 00:24:37,017 --> 00:24:38,118
  2678. What about you,
  2679. what have you been up to?
  2680.  
  2681. 584
  2682. 00:24:39,085 --> 00:24:40,251
  2683. You're the secretary...
  2684. I'm joking.
  2685.  
  2686. 585
  2687. 00:24:40,253 --> 00:24:41,387
  2688. I know what
  2689. you've been up to.
  2690.  
  2691. 586
  2692. 00:24:41,389 --> 00:24:42,588
  2693. - Yeah.
  2694. - You're very, um...
  2695.  
  2696. 587
  2697. 00:24:42,590 --> 00:24:44,956
  2698. You know, I just, I... I just
  2699. wanna say it's, like, amazing
  2700.  
  2701. 588
  2702. 00:24:44,958 --> 00:24:46,024
  2703. to see what you've done
  2704. with your life.
  2705.  
  2706. 589
  2707. 00:24:46,026 --> 00:24:47,158
  2708. A lot of people say
  2709. they're gonna do
  2710.  
  2711. 590
  2712. 00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:49,260
  2713. all this incredible stuff
  2714. and they don't do anything,
  2715.  
  2716. 591
  2717. 00:24:49,262 --> 00:24:51,898
  2718. but you actually did it all,
  2719. so, congrats.
  2720.  
  2721. 592
  2722. 00:24:53,267 --> 00:24:55,233
  2723. Well, I'm trying.
  2724.  
  2725. 593
  2726. 00:24:55,235 --> 00:24:56,770
  2727. I think you've done it.
  2728.  
  2729. 594
  2730. 00:24:58,439 --> 00:24:59,739
  2731. Oh!
  2732.  
  2733. 595
  2734. 00:25:00,907 --> 00:25:02,208
  2735. Parker Wembley.
  2736.  
  2737. 596
  2738. 00:25:02,210 --> 00:25:03,475
  2739. I hate this guy.
  2740.  
  2741. 597
  2742. 00:25:03,477 --> 00:25:06,110
  2743. Parker Wembley, the guy
  2744. who buys and sells newspapers
  2745.  
  2746. 598
  2747. 00:25:06,112 --> 00:25:08,214
  2748. and thinks that hurricanes
  2749. are caused by gay marriage?
  2750.  
  2751. 599
  2752. 00:25:08,216 --> 00:25:09,281
  2753. You know him?
  2754.  
  2755. 600
  2756. 00:25:09,283 --> 00:25:10,482
  2757. He's coming over here.
  2758.  
  2759. 601
  2760. 00:25:10,484 --> 00:25:12,251
  2761. - Is he behind me?
  2762. - Yeah.
  2763.  
  2764. 602
  2765. 00:25:12,253 --> 00:25:15,853
  2766. - Finally. Secretary Field.
  2767. - Parker, how are you?
  2768.  
  2769. 603
  2770. 00:25:15,855 --> 00:25:18,022
  2771. You are looking
  2772. particularly gorgeous tonight.
  2773.  
  2774. 604
  2775. 00:25:18,024 --> 00:25:19,325
  2776. Thank you.
  2777.  
  2778. 605
  2779. 00:25:19,327 --> 00:25:21,493
  2780. I... I've been trying
  2781. to set a meeting with you
  2782.  
  2783. 606
  2784. 00:25:21,495 --> 00:25:24,096
  2785. for some months now,
  2786. and, uh...
  2787.  
  2788. 607
  2789. 00:25:24,098 --> 00:25:25,863
  2790. I mean, have you been
  2791. avoiding me?
  2792.  
  2793. 608
  2794. 00:25:25,865 --> 00:25:28,866
  2795. No! No.
  2796.  
  2797. 609
  2798. 00:25:28,868 --> 00:25:31,004
  2799. Not successfully.
  2800.  
  2801. 610
  2802. 00:25:32,473 --> 00:25:35,039
  2803. Who's your friend?
  2804.  
  2805. 611
  2806. 00:25:35,041 --> 00:25:36,908
  2807. - Fred.
  2808. - Hey, Fred!
  2809.  
  2810. 612
  2811. 00:25:36,910 --> 00:25:37,976
  2812. - Yes, hi.
  2813. - How are you?
  2814.  
  2815. 613
  2816. 00:25:37,978 --> 00:25:39,944
  2817. And, uh, what is it
  2818. that you do?
  2819.  
  2820. 614
  2821. 00:25:39,946 --> 00:25:41,980
  2822. I'm a journalist,
  2823. actually. Yeah.
  2824.  
  2825. 615
  2826. 00:25:41,982 --> 00:25:43,815
  2827. - Ooh, a journalist.
  2828. - Mmm-hmm. Yeah.
  2829.  
  2830. 616
  2831. 00:25:43,817 --> 00:25:46,218
  2832. Will I have read
  2833. anything that you've written?
  2834.  
  2835. 617
  2836. 00:25:46,220 --> 00:25:49,021
  2837. Probably not recently 'cause
  2838. I'm unemployed at the moment.
  2839.  
  2840. 618
  2841. 00:25:49,023 --> 00:25:50,922
  2842. Oh, I am so sorry
  2843. to hear that.
  2844.  
  2845. 619
  2846. 00:25:50,924 --> 00:25:52,191
  2847. Not your fault.
  2848.  
  2849. 620
  2850. 00:25:52,193 --> 00:25:54,126
  2851. Excuse me, Secretary Field,
  2852. we need a word.
  2853.  
  2854. 621
  2855. 00:25:54,128 --> 00:25:56,195
  2856. - Oh, okay.
  2857. - So we will have that meeting.
  2858.  
  2859. 622
  2860. 00:25:56,197 --> 00:25:57,263
  2861. - Right?
  2862. - Yes.
  2863.  
  2864. 623
  2865. 00:25:57,265 --> 00:25:58,998
  2866. Okay, good. Fred.
  2867.  
  2868. 624
  2869. 00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:00,165
  2870. - Yes?
  2871. - Best of luck.
  2872.  
  2873. 625
  2874. 00:26:00,167 --> 00:26:01,233
  2875. Oh, why, thanks.
  2876.  
  2877. 626
  2878. 00:26:01,235 --> 00:26:02,301
  2879. Things will turn around
  2880. for you.
  2881.  
  2882. 627
  2883. 00:26:02,303 --> 00:26:03,202
  2884. So nice of you.
  2885.  
  2886. 628
  2887. 00:26:03,204 --> 00:26:05,006
  2888. Darkest before the dawn
  2889. and all that.
  2890.  
  2891. 629
  2892. 00:26:06,540 --> 00:26:09,008
  2893. - I actually... I do have to...
  2894. - Yeah.
  2895.  
  2896. 630
  2897. 00:26:09,010 --> 00:26:10,376
  2898. You probably have a lot
  2899. of things to do.
  2900.  
  2901. 631
  2902. 00:26:10,378 --> 00:26:11,443
  2903. Better than this.
  2904.  
  2905. 632
  2906. 00:26:11,445 --> 00:26:12,578
  2907. It's really nice
  2908. to see you again.
  2909.  
  2910. 633
  2911. 00:26:12,580 --> 00:26:16,115
  2912. Oh. Yeah. Okay. Sure. Great.
  2913.  
  2914. 634
  2915. 00:26:16,117 --> 00:26:19,151
  2916. Oh, you're backless.
  2917. Wasn't expecting that.
  2918.  
  2919. 635
  2920. 00:26:19,153 --> 00:26:21,020
  2921. - Have fun at the party.
  2922. - You too.
  2923.  
  2924. 636
  2925. 00:26:21,022 --> 00:26:22,156
  2926. Great to see you.
  2927.  
  2928. 637
  2929. 00:26:25,226 --> 00:26:28,193
  2930. I see you. I see you. Yeah.
  2931.  
  2932. 638
  2933. 00:26:30,631 --> 00:26:33,067
  2934. So I said,
  2935. "You want..."
  2936.  
  2937. 639
  2938. 00:26:34,568 --> 00:26:35,968
  2939. Hey. Hey.
  2940. What's that look in your eye?
  2941.  
  2942. 640
  2943. 00:26:35,970 --> 00:26:37,036
  2944. What are you
  2945. about to go do?
  2946.  
  2947. 641
  2948. 00:26:37,038 --> 00:26:38,871
  2949. Tonight is
  2950. about the animals, dude.
  2951.  
  2952. 642
  2953. 00:26:38,873 --> 00:26:40,873
  2954. Fuck the animals!
  2955. They're fucking gone, man.
  2956.  
  2957. 643
  2958. 00:26:40,875 --> 00:26:42,574
  2959. Too late
  2960. for the fucking animals.
  2961.  
  2962. 644
  2963. 00:26:44,412 --> 00:26:46,078
  2964. Hey!
  2965.  
  2966. 645
  2967. 00:26:46,080 --> 00:26:47,579
  2968. - Oh, Fred?
  2969. - Yeah, look.
  2970.  
  2971. 646
  2972. 00:26:47,581 --> 00:26:49,915
  2973. - What's the problem?
  2974. - I'll tell you the problem.
  2975.  
  2976. 647
  2977. 00:26:49,917 --> 00:26:51,450
  2978. - What?
  2979. - You're the problem, man!
  2980.  
  2981. 648
  2982. 00:26:51,452 --> 00:26:54,019
  2983. You're everything that's wrong
  2984. with this fucking country.
  2985.  
  2986. 649
  2987. 00:26:54,021 --> 00:26:57,256
  2988. 'Cause you're an old,
  2989. rich, white piece of shit
  2990.  
  2991. 650
  2992. 00:26:57,258 --> 00:26:59,992
  2993. and your media conglomerate
  2994. is ruining this planet!
  2995.  
  2996. 651
  2997. 00:26:59,994 --> 00:27:01,927
  2998. - Enough.
  2999. - I'm done anyway.
  3000.  
  3001. 652
  3002. 00:27:01,929 --> 00:27:03,595
  3003. I had more time with you
  3004. than I thought I would,
  3005.  
  3006. 653
  3007. 00:27:03,597 --> 00:27:05,230
  3008. so joke's on you.
  3009. Excuse me, thank you.
  3010.  
  3011. 654
  3012. 00:27:05,232 --> 00:27:06,899
  3013. Whoa, shit!
  3014.  
  3015. 655
  3016. 00:27:09,337 --> 00:27:10,570
  3017. God!
  3018.  
  3019. 656
  3020. 00:27:12,106 --> 00:27:13,272
  3021. <i>Cracker down!</i>
  3022.  
  3023. 657
  3024. 00:27:13,274 --> 00:27:14,674
  3025. Oh, my God.
  3026.  
  3027. 658
  3028. 00:27:14,676 --> 00:27:16,010
  3029. Looks like it hurt.
  3030.  
  3031. 659
  3032. 00:27:16,645 --> 00:27:18,510
  3033. Boyz II Men, back up.
  3034.  
  3035. 660
  3036. 00:27:18,512 --> 00:27:19,978
  3037. You all right? You good?
  3038.  
  3039. 661
  3040. 00:27:19,980 --> 00:27:21,146
  3041. - You all right?
  3042. - I'm okay!
  3043.  
  3044. 662
  3045. 00:27:21,148 --> 00:27:22,214
  3046. He's okay!
  3047.  
  3048. 663
  3049. 00:27:22,216 --> 00:27:23,351
  3050. How is he standing?
  3051.  
  3052. 664
  3053. 00:27:29,957 --> 00:27:32,059
  3054. - Oh!
  3055. - Ouch!
  3056.  
  3057. 665
  3058. 00:27:34,095 --> 00:27:37,930
  3059. <i>♪ Oh, no
  3060. That's the Ruff Ryder...</i>
  3061.  
  3062. 666
  3063. 00:27:37,932 --> 00:27:38,997
  3064. This is so creative.
  3065.  
  3066. 667
  3067. 00:27:41,335 --> 00:27:42,569
  3068. Ha-ha!
  3069.  
  3070. 668
  3071. 00:27:42,571 --> 00:27:44,138
  3072. - What was that?
  3073. - Thank you, Tom.
  3074.  
  3075. 669
  3076. 00:27:44,639 --> 00:27:46,972
  3077. God, that was crazy.
  3078.  
  3079. 670
  3080. 00:27:46,974 --> 00:27:48,340
  3081. I mean,
  3082. now that we know he's okay,
  3083.  
  3084. 671
  3085. 00:27:48,342 --> 00:27:51,009
  3086. it was all so hilarious.
  3087.  
  3088. 672
  3089. 00:27:51,011 --> 00:27:53,613
  3090. And so what is
  3091. the relationship exactly?
  3092.  
  3093. 673
  3094. 00:27:53,615 --> 00:27:55,247
  3095. - Was he your super?
  3096. - No,
  3097.  
  3098. 674
  3099. 00:27:55,249 --> 00:27:57,182
  3100. we grew up
  3101. next door to each other.
  3102.  
  3103. 675
  3104. 00:27:57,184 --> 00:27:58,451
  3105. Yeah.
  3106.  
  3107. 676
  3108. 00:27:58,453 --> 00:28:01,321
  3109. Fuck,
  3110. I used to babysit for him.
  3111.  
  3112. 677
  3113. 00:28:01,323 --> 00:28:03,556
  3114. - You babysat for him?
  3115. - I did.
  3116.  
  3117. 678
  3118. 00:28:03,558 --> 00:28:06,225
  3119. Wow. Time has not been kind.
  3120.  
  3121. 679
  3122. 00:28:06,227 --> 00:28:07,226
  3123. He was
  3124. such a strange little kid.
  3125.  
  3126. 680
  3127. 00:28:07,228 --> 00:28:10,430
  3128. But he was really funny.
  3129. And he was super smart.
  3130.  
  3131. 681
  3132. 00:28:10,432 --> 00:28:12,499
  3133. He did have this chip
  3134. on his shoulder, though.
  3135.  
  3136. 682
  3137. 00:28:12,501 --> 00:28:14,534
  3138. He's actually
  3139. not a bad writer.
  3140.  
  3141. 683
  3142. 00:28:14,536 --> 00:28:15,968
  3143. Wait, you've read
  3144. his stuff?
  3145.  
  3146. 684
  3147. 00:28:15,970 --> 00:28:17,169
  3148. Yeah, <i>Brooklyn Advocate.</i>
  3149.  
  3150. 685
  3151. 00:28:17,171 --> 00:28:19,472
  3152. Oh, God, of course,
  3153. you read that, Tom.
  3154.  
  3155. 686
  3156. 00:28:19,474 --> 00:28:21,241
  3157. Didn't that paper
  3158. just get sold off?
  3159.  
  3160. 687
  3161. 00:28:21,243 --> 00:28:22,609
  3162. Wembley Media
  3163. just bought them.
  3164.  
  3165. 688
  3166. 00:28:22,611 --> 00:28:25,177
  3167. Oh, that makes total sense.
  3168.  
  3169. 689
  3170. 00:28:25,179 --> 00:28:27,380
  3171. That's why he was
  3172. such a dick to Wembley.
  3173.  
  3174. 690
  3175. 00:28:27,382 --> 00:28:31,386
  3176. So the rest of the schedule
  3177. for the day is pretty packed.
  3178.  
  3179. 691
  3180. 00:28:41,696 --> 00:28:43,028
  3181. - Hi.
  3182. - Hey.
  3183.  
  3184. 692
  3185. 00:28:43,030 --> 00:28:45,732
  3186. Did you like
  3187. any of those writing samples?
  3188.  
  3189. 693
  3190. 00:28:45,734 --> 00:28:48,601
  3191. Yeah, McKenzie is good.
  3192. Bess is solid.
  3193.  
  3194. 694
  3195. 00:28:48,603 --> 00:28:53,139
  3196. And, um,
  3197. Fred's stuff isn't too bad.
  3198.  
  3199. 695
  3200. 00:28:53,141 --> 00:28:55,108
  3201. Wait, not the...
  3202.  
  3203. 696
  3204. 00:28:55,110 --> 00:28:57,577
  3205. The homeless person
  3206. that fell down the stairs?
  3207.  
  3208. 697
  3209. 00:28:57,579 --> 00:29:00,180
  3210. Yeah. He has a real voice.
  3211.  
  3212. 698
  3213. 00:29:00,182 --> 00:29:02,782
  3214. And he knows me.
  3215. I mean, he knew me.
  3216.  
  3217. 699
  3218. 00:29:02,784 --> 00:29:04,451
  3219. And that's probably
  3220. a good thing
  3221.  
  3222. 700
  3223. 00:29:04,453 --> 00:29:07,353
  3224. if he's going to be
  3225. writing for me.
  3226.  
  3227. 701
  3228. 00:29:07,355 --> 00:29:09,389
  3229. Bringing someone like that
  3230. onto the team,
  3231.  
  3232. 702
  3233. 00:29:09,391 --> 00:29:12,091
  3234. I have to say,
  3235. feels a little reckless.
  3236.  
  3237. 703
  3238. 00:29:12,093 --> 00:29:15,562
  3239. His writing is really good.
  3240. And it's funny.
  3241.  
  3242. 704
  3243. 00:29:15,564 --> 00:29:17,597
  3244. I think he can get that
  3245. number up by a few points.
  3246.  
  3247. 705
  3248. 00:29:17,599 --> 00:29:19,301
  3249. And if he doesn't,
  3250. we fire him.
  3251.  
  3252. 706
  3253. 00:29:20,168 --> 00:29:21,234
  3254. Okay.
  3255.  
  3256. 707
  3257. 00:29:21,236 --> 00:29:22,237
  3258. Okay.
  3259.  
  3260. 708
  3261. 00:29:22,771 --> 00:29:24,239
  3262. Fred Flarsky it is.
  3263.  
  3264. 709
  3265. 00:29:24,673 --> 00:29:26,041
  3266. Thanks.
  3267.  
  3268. 710
  3269. 00:29:31,213 --> 00:29:32,214
  3270. All right, bye.
  3271.  
  3272. 711
  3273. 00:29:38,653 --> 00:29:40,286
  3274. Unknown!
  3275.  
  3276. 712
  3277. 00:29:40,288 --> 00:29:42,088
  3278. I don't give a fuck.
  3279. Answer that shit.
  3280.  
  3281. 713
  3282. 00:29:42,090 --> 00:29:43,456
  3283. - What?
  3284. - Answer it!
  3285.  
  3286. 714
  3287. 00:29:43,458 --> 00:29:45,091
  3288. What if it's The Man
  3289. trying to get at me?
  3290.  
  3291. 715
  3292. 00:29:45,093 --> 00:29:46,794
  3293. No, it's the universe
  3294. trying to talk to you.
  3295.  
  3296. 716
  3297. 00:29:46,796 --> 00:29:48,061
  3298. Really?
  3299.  
  3300. 717
  3301. 00:29:48,063 --> 00:29:49,529
  3302. - Gang.
  3303. - Gang.
  3304.  
  3305. 718
  3306. 00:29:49,531 --> 00:29:51,297
  3307. Do that shit, man.
  3308. Fred, don't fuck with me.
  3309.  
  3310. 719
  3311. 00:29:51,299 --> 00:29:52,833
  3312. All right. Hello. Gang.
  3313.  
  3314. 720
  3315. 00:29:52,835 --> 00:29:54,667
  3316. - Mr. Flarsky?
  3317. - <i>What?</i>
  3318.  
  3319. 721
  3320. 00:29:54,669 --> 00:29:56,202
  3321. Wait, slow down. What?
  3322.  
  3323. 722
  3324. 00:29:56,204 --> 00:29:58,104
  3325. - <i>You're unknown. Pardon?</i>
  3326. - Oh, my God. Mr. Flarsky.
  3327.  
  3328. 723
  3329. 00:29:58,106 --> 00:30:00,206
  3330. - <i>Hello?</i>
  3331. - Go on.
  3332.  
  3333. 724
  3334. 00:30:00,208 --> 00:30:03,811
  3335. This is Maggie Millikin
  3336. from Secretary Field's office.
  3337.  
  3338. 725
  3339. 00:30:03,813 --> 00:30:06,112
  3340. Hello, Maggie,
  3341. who works for Secretary Field.
  3342.  
  3343. 726
  3344. 00:30:06,114 --> 00:30:07,781
  3345. - Whoo!
  3346. - <i>Hello?</i>
  3347.  
  3348. 727
  3349. 00:30:07,783 --> 00:30:09,082
  3350. That's good!
  3351. Talk to her.
  3352.  
  3353. 728
  3354. 00:30:09,084 --> 00:30:11,752
  3355. - <i>Hello?</i>
  3356. - How can I help you?
  3357.  
  3358. 729
  3359. 00:30:11,754 --> 00:30:13,721
  3360. The secretary would like
  3361. to meet with you immediately.
  3362.  
  3363. 730
  3364. 00:30:13,723 --> 00:30:15,088
  3365. We will send a car over.
  3366.  
  3367. 731
  3368. 00:30:15,090 --> 00:30:16,790
  3369. Can you give me
  3370. the most convenient address?
  3371.  
  3372. 732
  3373. 00:30:16,792 --> 00:30:18,626
  3374. - What is she saying?
  3375. - Secretary would like
  3376.  
  3377. 733
  3378. 00:30:18,628 --> 00:30:19,727
  3379. to meet with me immediately
  3380.  
  3381. 734
  3382. 00:30:19,729 --> 00:30:20,763
  3383. and they're going
  3384. to send a car?
  3385.  
  3386. 735
  3387. 00:30:23,164 --> 00:30:25,833
  3388. Mr. Lou's Deli in Brooklyn.
  3389.  
  3390. 736
  3391. 00:30:25,835 --> 00:30:28,268
  3392. - I'm sure you can find it.
  3393. - <i>I will google it.</i>
  3394.  
  3395. 737
  3396. 00:30:28,270 --> 00:30:30,303
  3397. Mr. Lou's in Brooklyn.
  3398. Stay right there.
  3399.  
  3400. 738
  3401. 00:30:30,305 --> 00:30:31,371
  3402. <i>Okay.</i>
  3403.  
  3404. 739
  3405. 00:30:31,373 --> 00:30:33,540
  3406. Uh, I'll see you soon.
  3407.  
  3408. 740
  3409. 00:30:33,542 --> 00:30:35,811
  3410. Oh,
  3411. I feel so scared.
  3412.  
  3413. 741
  3414. 00:30:36,612 --> 00:30:37,745
  3415. Do I look okay?
  3416.  
  3417. 742
  3418. 00:30:37,747 --> 00:30:39,212
  3419. Do I look funny?
  3420.  
  3421. 743
  3422. 00:30:39,214 --> 00:30:40,446
  3423. - Why are these pockets here?
  3424. - It's okay.
  3425.  
  3426. 744
  3427. 00:30:40,448 --> 00:30:41,715
  3428. God fucking damn it!
  3429.  
  3430. 745
  3431. 00:30:41,717 --> 00:30:43,584
  3432. Why am I wearing
  3433. these fucking stupid pants?
  3434.  
  3435. 746
  3436. 00:30:43,586 --> 00:30:44,818
  3437. They're too tapered!
  3438.  
  3439. 747
  3440. 00:30:44,820 --> 00:30:47,253
  3441. Who wears these silly-looking,
  3442. fucking tapered cargo pants
  3443.  
  3444. 748
  3445. 00:30:47,255 --> 00:30:49,389
  3446. and see the fucking
  3447. secretary of state?
  3448.  
  3449. 749
  3450. 00:30:49,391 --> 00:30:50,891
  3451. You can't think like this.
  3452. You have to be positive.
  3453.  
  3454. 750
  3455. 00:30:50,893 --> 00:30:52,392
  3456. - Mr. Flarsky?
  3457. - Oh, shit.
  3458.  
  3459. 751
  3460. 00:30:52,394 --> 00:30:53,529
  3461. Mr. Flarsky.
  3462.  
  3463. 752
  3464. 00:30:56,131 --> 00:30:57,230
  3465. Wish me luck, man.
  3466.  
  3467. 753
  3468. 00:30:57,232 --> 00:30:58,766
  3469. Yeah, you don't need luck, man.
  3470. She said it was okay.
  3471.  
  3472. 754
  3473. 00:30:58,768 --> 00:30:59,833
  3474. Luck is for losers.
  3475.  
  3476. 755
  3477. 00:30:59,835 --> 00:31:01,835
  3478. You've got destiny
  3479. on your side.
  3480.  
  3481. 756
  3482. 00:31:01,837 --> 00:31:04,638
  3483. You're good. Fred.
  3484.  
  3485. 757
  3486. 00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:06,174
  3487. You buy the body.
  3488.  
  3489. 758
  3490. 00:31:06,809 --> 00:31:08,076
  3491. That doesn't mean anything.
  3492.  
  3493. 759
  3494. 00:31:10,513 --> 00:31:12,178
  3495. Fred, put your
  3496. seat belt on.
  3497.  
  3498. 760
  3499. 00:31:12,180 --> 00:31:14,650
  3500. Take care of my friend.
  3501. All right?
  3502.  
  3503. 761
  3504. 00:31:15,718 --> 00:31:17,918
  3505. - I look normal?
  3506. - You look cool.
  3507.  
  3508. 762
  3509. 00:31:17,920 --> 00:31:19,321
  3510. I love you, Fred!
  3511.  
  3512. 763
  3513. 00:31:19,889 --> 00:31:21,757
  3514. Nut boys for life!
  3515.  
  3516. 764
  3517. 00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:40,808
  3518. Empty your pockets
  3519. and take off your backpack.
  3520.  
  3521. 765
  3522. 00:31:40,810 --> 00:31:42,177
  3523. Empty my pockets?
  3524.  
  3525. 766
  3526. 00:31:44,313 --> 00:31:45,715
  3527. All right. That's...
  3528.  
  3529. 767
  3530. 00:31:46,816 --> 00:31:48,250
  3531. Let's see how this goes.
  3532.  
  3533. 768
  3534. 00:31:51,354 --> 00:31:53,387
  3535. Not a regular cop, I assume.
  3536.  
  3537. 769
  3538. 00:31:53,389 --> 00:31:56,757
  3539. Got bigger fish to fry than
  3540. just normal cop shit, right?
  3541.  
  3542. 770
  3543. 00:31:56,759 --> 00:31:58,794
  3544. So, uh, okay. Let's do it.
  3545.  
  3546. 771
  3547. 00:32:00,563 --> 00:32:04,298
  3548. That's prescription.
  3549. For anxiety. Uh...
  3550.  
  3551. 772
  3552. 00:32:04,300 --> 00:32:07,868
  3553. This is if you can't dance for
  3554. a long time and you want to.
  3555.  
  3556. 773
  3557. 00:32:07,870 --> 00:32:10,537
  3558. That's prescription as well,
  3559. for, uh, lack of energy.
  3560.  
  3561. 774
  3562. 00:32:10,539 --> 00:32:11,805
  3563. That's energy powder.
  3564.  
  3565. 775
  3566. 00:32:11,807 --> 00:32:15,411
  3567. These are to wrap
  3568. the anxiety medication in
  3569.  
  3570. 776
  3571. 00:32:16,278 --> 00:32:19,346
  3572. when inhaling it medicinally.
  3573.  
  3574. 777
  3575. 00:32:19,348 --> 00:32:21,815
  3576. That's if you want to vaporize
  3577. the anxiety medicine,
  3578.  
  3579. 778
  3580. 00:32:21,817 --> 00:32:23,486
  3581. which I have
  3582. a prescription for.
  3583.  
  3584. 779
  3585. 00:32:24,487 --> 00:32:25,821
  3586. And that's a blunt.
  3587.  
  3588. 780
  3589. 00:32:31,861 --> 00:32:33,195
  3590. Ooh.
  3591.  
  3592. 781
  3593. 00:32:34,864 --> 00:32:35,865
  3594. Hi.
  3595.  
  3596. 782
  3597. 00:32:41,604 --> 00:32:42,672
  3598. Wow.
  3599.  
  3600. 783
  3601. 00:32:44,840 --> 00:32:46,306
  3602. Will you sign this, please?
  3603.  
  3604. 784
  3605. 00:32:46,308 --> 00:32:48,509
  3606. - What is it?
  3607. - It's an NDA.
  3608.  
  3609. 785
  3610. 00:32:48,511 --> 00:32:49,576
  3611. A non-disclosure agreement?
  3612.  
  3613. 786
  3614. 00:32:49,578 --> 00:32:51,880
  3615. - That's right.
  3616. - Okay.
  3617.  
  3618. 787
  3619. 00:32:51,882 --> 00:32:53,547
  3620. - Oh, my God.
  3621. - Fred.
  3622.  
  3623. 788
  3624. 00:32:53,549 --> 00:32:55,349
  3625. - Yeah.
  3626. - Hey, nice to see you again.
  3627.  
  3628. 789
  3629. 00:32:55,351 --> 00:32:56,684
  3630. - Hi, you too.
  3631. - Come on in.
  3632.  
  3633. 790
  3634. 00:32:56,686 --> 00:32:57,685
  3635. Take a seat.
  3636.  
  3637. 791
  3638. 00:32:57,687 --> 00:32:59,888
  3639. Good to see you were
  3640. not injured from that fall.
  3641.  
  3642. 792
  3643. 00:32:59,890 --> 00:33:01,722
  3644. Oh, yeah, you know what?
  3645.  
  3646. 793
  3647. 00:33:01,724 --> 00:33:03,323
  3648. I actually think
  3649. the brim of my hat
  3650.  
  3651. 794
  3652. 00:33:03,325 --> 00:33:04,893
  3653. kind of protected
  3654. my face ultimately.
  3655.  
  3656. 795
  3657. 00:33:04,895 --> 00:33:07,294
  3658. So, thank God I was
  3659. underdressed in the end, right?
  3660.  
  3661. 796
  3662. 00:33:07,296 --> 00:33:09,263
  3663. Well, as long as you're good.
  3664.  
  3665. 797
  3666. 00:33:09,265 --> 00:33:10,664
  3667. - I'm okay.
  3668. - Yeah. Great.
  3669.  
  3670. 798
  3671. 00:33:10,666 --> 00:33:11,734
  3672. Uh...
  3673.  
  3674. 799
  3675. 00:33:13,536 --> 00:33:14,969
  3676. Why am I here?
  3677.  
  3678. 800
  3679. 00:33:14,971 --> 00:33:16,570
  3680. What I'm about to
  3681. share with you
  3682.  
  3683. 801
  3684. 00:33:16,572 --> 00:33:18,706
  3685. is, obviously,
  3686. highly confidential.
  3687.  
  3688. 802
  3689. 00:33:18,708 --> 00:33:19,808
  3690. Oh, yeah.
  3691.  
  3692. 803
  3693. 00:33:19,810 --> 00:33:21,243
  3694. Keep it
  3695. on the down low.
  3696.  
  3697. 804
  3698. 00:33:22,746 --> 00:33:25,414
  3699. President Chambers will not
  3700. be seeking reelection.
  3701.  
  3702. 805
  3703. 00:33:25,716 --> 00:33:26,781
  3704. Really?
  3705.  
  3706. 806
  3707. 00:33:26,783 --> 00:33:28,449
  3708. Yes.
  3709.  
  3710. 807
  3711. 00:33:28,451 --> 00:33:32,453
  3712. That's fucking sick!
  3713. That's awesome.
  3714.  
  3715. 808
  3716. 00:33:32,455 --> 00:33:35,556
  3717. Are you telling each American
  3718. individually the good news?
  3719.  
  3720. 809
  3721. 00:33:35,558 --> 00:33:36,623
  3722. I mean, but seriously.
  3723.  
  3724. 810
  3725. 00:33:36,625 --> 00:33:37,792
  3726. Did he just realize
  3727. he sucks at it
  3728.  
  3729. 811
  3730. 00:33:37,794 --> 00:33:39,526
  3731. and decide
  3732. not to do it anymore?
  3733.  
  3734. 812
  3735. 00:33:39,528 --> 00:33:43,464
  3736. He just wants to move
  3737. into film and make movies.
  3738.  
  3739. 813
  3740. 00:33:43,466 --> 00:33:44,933
  3741. - Really?
  3742. - Yeah.
  3743.  
  3744. 814
  3745. 00:33:44,935 --> 00:33:46,835
  3746. That's cool. That's a tough
  3747. transition to make.
  3748.  
  3749. 815
  3750. 00:33:46,837 --> 00:33:49,671
  3751. Not many actors have made
  3752. the leap from TV to film.
  3753.  
  3754. 816
  3755. 00:33:49,673 --> 00:33:51,405
  3756. You got George Clooney,
  3757. you got Woody Harrelson...
  3758.  
  3759. 817
  3760. 00:33:51,407 --> 00:33:52,473
  3761. Jennifer Aniston.
  3762.  
  3763. 818
  3764. 00:33:52,475 --> 00:33:54,075
  3765. Mmm, did she though?
  3766.  
  3767. 819
  3768. 00:33:54,077 --> 00:33:55,777
  3769. You don't think Jennifer
  3770. Aniston's a movie star?
  3771.  
  3772. 820
  3773. 00:33:55,779 --> 00:33:56,845
  3774. Just 'cause
  3775. you star in movies
  3776.  
  3777. 821
  3778. 00:33:56,847 --> 00:33:57,912
  3779. doesn't mean
  3780. you're a movie star.
  3781.  
  3782. 822
  3783. 00:33:57,914 --> 00:34:00,048
  3784. The point is...
  3785.  
  3786. 823
  3787. 00:34:00,050 --> 00:34:02,853
  3788. He's going to endorse me
  3789. for president in 2020.
  3790.  
  3791. 824
  3792. 00:34:03,352 --> 00:34:04,418
  3793. Wow.
  3794.  
  3795. 825
  3796. 00:34:04,420 --> 00:34:05,754
  3797. - I know.
  3798. - <i>Mazel tov.</i>
  3799.  
  3800. 826
  3801. 00:34:05,756 --> 00:34:06,888
  3802. So.
  3803.  
  3804. 827
  3805. 00:34:06,890 --> 00:34:08,957
  3806. We're headed to
  3807. an environmental summit
  3808.  
  3809. 828
  3810. 00:34:08,959 --> 00:34:10,390
  3811. hosted by King Gustav
  3812.  
  3813. 829
  3814. 00:34:10,392 --> 00:34:12,026
  3815. and the Swedish Royal Family.
  3816.  
  3817. 830
  3818. 00:34:12,028 --> 00:34:14,328
  3819. At the summit,
  3820. I'll be announcing
  3821.  
  3822. 831
  3823. 00:34:14,330 --> 00:34:16,430
  3824. that the world's
  3825. three largest polluters
  3826.  
  3827. 832
  3828. 00:34:16,432 --> 00:34:17,799
  3829. have signed on
  3830. to the most comprehensive
  3831.  
  3832. 833
  3833. 00:34:17,801 --> 00:34:19,801
  3834. and exciting
  3835. environmental deal ever.
  3836.  
  3837. 834
  3838. 00:34:19,803 --> 00:34:21,069
  3839. You know,
  3840. after I have some dairy,
  3841.  
  3842. 835
  3843. 00:34:21,071 --> 00:34:22,937
  3844. I'm one of the world's
  3845. three largest polluters.
  3846.  
  3847. 836
  3848. 00:34:22,939 --> 00:34:24,105
  3849. Excuse me?
  3850.  
  3851. 837
  3852. 00:34:24,107 --> 00:34:26,508
  3853. We'll address
  3854. rising sea levels,
  3855.  
  3856. 838
  3857. 00:34:26,510 --> 00:34:28,109
  3858. combat deforestation
  3859.  
  3860. 839
  3861. 00:34:28,111 --> 00:34:30,445
  3862. and protect
  3863. the world's pollinators.
  3864.  
  3865. 840
  3866. 00:34:30,447 --> 00:34:33,548
  3867. I'm calling it the Global
  3868. Rehabilitation Initiative.
  3869.  
  3870. 841
  3871. 00:34:33,550 --> 00:34:34,816
  3872. Internally,
  3873. we're referring to it
  3874.  
  3875. 842
  3876. 00:34:34,818 --> 00:34:36,117
  3877. as "Bees, Trees and the Seas."
  3878.  
  3879. 843
  3880. 00:34:36,119 --> 00:34:37,652
  3881. Soon after that,
  3882.  
  3883. 844
  3884. 00:34:37,654 --> 00:34:39,988
  3885. I hope to announce that
  3886. 100 countries have signed on.
  3887.  
  3888. 845
  3889. 00:34:39,990 --> 00:34:42,490
  3890. - Wow.
  3891. - At which point...
  3892.  
  3893. 846
  3894. 00:34:42,492 --> 00:34:44,859
  3895. I will resign
  3896. as secretary of state.
  3897.  
  3898. 847
  3899. 00:34:44,861 --> 00:34:47,862
  3900. Using this initiative
  3901. as a springboard,
  3902.  
  3903. 848
  3904. 00:34:47,864 --> 00:34:50,064
  3905. I will announce
  3906. my presidential run in 2020.
  3907.  
  3908. 849
  3909. 00:34:50,066 --> 00:34:51,668
  3910. - Cool.
  3911. - So...
  3912.  
  3913. 850
  3914. 00:34:53,570 --> 00:34:56,137
  3915. I need some writers
  3916. to punch up my speeches.
  3917.  
  3918. 851
  3919. 00:34:56,139 --> 00:34:58,473
  3920. I read your work
  3921. and I really like it.
  3922.  
  3923. 852
  3924. 00:34:58,475 --> 00:34:59,674
  3925. That's... Wow.
  3926.  
  3927. 853
  3928. 00:34:59,676 --> 00:35:01,376
  3929. You mentioned
  3930. you were between jobs.
  3931.  
  3932. 854
  3933. 00:35:01,378 --> 00:35:02,343
  3934. So it's a really good fit.
  3935.  
  3936. 855
  3937. 00:35:02,345 --> 00:35:04,913
  3938. It's so nice of you
  3939. to think of me at all,
  3940.  
  3941. 856
  3942. 00:35:04,915 --> 00:35:07,415
  3943. honestly, with everything
  3944. going on in your head.
  3945.  
  3946. 857
  3947. 00:35:07,417 --> 00:35:08,716
  3948. I look forward
  3949. to working with you.
  3950.  
  3951. 858
  3952. 00:35:08,718 --> 00:35:09,719
  3953. Thank you.
  3954.  
  3955. 859
  3956. 00:35:11,855 --> 00:35:14,724
  3957. Um... So, uh,
  3958. when do you need to know by?
  3959.  
  3960. 860
  3961. 00:35:15,992 --> 00:35:18,126
  3962. What?
  3963. I don't understand.
  3964.  
  3965. 861
  3966. 00:35:18,128 --> 00:35:20,162
  3967. When do you need to know if
  3968. I'm going to take your, uh,
  3969.  
  3970. 862
  3971. 00:35:20,164 --> 00:35:21,731
  3972. your punch-up job?
  3973.  
  3974. 863
  3975. 00:35:23,134 --> 00:35:24,599
  3976. Right now.
  3977.  
  3978. 864
  3979. 00:35:24,601 --> 00:35:27,169
  3980. Oh. Uh...
  3981. Then I guess,
  3982.  
  3983. 865
  3984. 00:35:27,171 --> 00:35:29,871
  3985. maybe... Maybe, uh, no?
  3986.  
  3987. 866
  3988. 00:35:29,873 --> 00:35:32,141
  3989. Maybe no, I don't know.
  3990. I don't know!
  3991.  
  3992. 867
  3993. 00:35:32,143 --> 00:35:33,242
  3994. You know what,
  3995. Madam Secretary,
  3996.  
  3997. 868
  3998. 00:35:33,244 --> 00:35:35,177
  3999. he's not interested.
  4000. We tried, it didn't work out.
  4001.  
  4002. 869
  4003. 00:35:35,179 --> 00:35:37,948
  4004. So I can give you
  4005. some writing samples...
  4006.  
  4007. 870
  4008. 00:35:42,953 --> 00:35:44,953
  4009. What don't you know?
  4010.  
  4011. 871
  4012. 00:35:44,955 --> 00:35:47,488
  4013. This whole Seas, Bees
  4014. and Trees thing.
  4015.  
  4016. 872
  4017. 00:35:47,490 --> 00:35:49,124
  4018. Is it actually
  4019. going to do something?
  4020.  
  4021. 873
  4022. 00:35:49,126 --> 00:35:50,792
  4023. Or is it going to be
  4024. one of those things
  4025.  
  4026. 874
  4027. 00:35:50,794 --> 00:35:52,827
  4028. that maybe only sounds like
  4029. it's gonna do something,
  4030.  
  4031. 875
  4032. 00:35:52,829 --> 00:35:54,562
  4033. but doesn't
  4034. actually do something?
  4035.  
  4036. 876
  4037. 00:35:54,564 --> 00:35:57,099
  4038. I only wanna come work for you
  4039.  
  4040. 877
  4041. 00:35:57,101 --> 00:35:58,666
  4042. if it's actually
  4043. gonna do something.
  4044.  
  4045. 878
  4046. 00:35:58,668 --> 00:35:59,969
  4047. It will do something.
  4048.  
  4049. 879
  4050. 00:35:59,971 --> 00:36:01,836
  4051. This is a perfect document.
  4052.  
  4053. 880
  4054. 00:36:01,838 --> 00:36:04,139
  4055. They all start out that way
  4056. and then they get watered down.
  4057.  
  4058. 881
  4059. 00:36:04,141 --> 00:36:05,074
  4060. Fred.
  4061.  
  4062. 882
  4063. 00:36:05,076 --> 00:36:07,542
  4064. Not only does this
  4065. initiative sound good,
  4066.  
  4067. 883
  4068. 00:36:07,544 --> 00:36:08,409
  4069. it's going to do good.
  4070.  
  4071. 884
  4072. 00:36:08,411 --> 00:36:10,778
  4073. It's gonna save
  4074. the fucking planet.
  4075.  
  4076. 885
  4077. 00:36:10,780 --> 00:36:12,948
  4078. Not to mention,
  4079. pay your rent.
  4080.  
  4081. 886
  4082. 00:36:12,950 --> 00:36:14,216
  4083. So, are you in?
  4084.  
  4085. 887
  4086. 00:36:14,218 --> 00:36:16,854
  4087. Or do you have something
  4088. more important to do?
  4089.  
  4090. 888
  4091. 00:36:17,855 --> 00:36:19,522
  4092. Than save the planet with you?
  4093.  
  4094. 889
  4095. 00:36:21,225 --> 00:36:23,859
  4096. No, I don't.
  4097. I'm in.
  4098.  
  4099. 890
  4100. 00:36:23,861 --> 00:36:25,693
  4101. Phew!
  4102.  
  4103. 891
  4104. 00:36:25,695 --> 00:36:26,964
  4105. Let's save the planet.
  4106.  
  4107. 892
  4108. 00:36:27,631 --> 00:36:28,596
  4109. That was...
  4110.  
  4111. 893
  4112. 00:36:28,598 --> 00:36:30,700
  4113. What just happened?
  4114. She's good.
  4115.  
  4116. 894
  4117. 00:36:56,260 --> 00:36:57,228
  4118. Uh, hey.
  4119.  
  4120. 895
  4121. 00:36:59,163 --> 00:37:01,163
  4122. I had some jokes, uh,
  4123. I was gonna run by you,
  4124.  
  4125. 896
  4126. 00:37:01,165 --> 00:37:02,599
  4127. maybe, if you have a second.
  4128.  
  4129. 897
  4130. 00:37:05,903 --> 00:37:08,505
  4131. What are you...
  4132. What are you looking at?
  4133.  
  4134. 898
  4135. 00:37:12,910 --> 00:37:13,976
  4136. - Jesus!
  4137. - Oh, my God!
  4138.  
  4139. 899
  4140. 00:37:13,978 --> 00:37:16,211
  4141. Why would you just barge
  4142. in here while I'm sleeping?
  4143.  
  4144. 900
  4145. 00:37:16,213 --> 00:37:17,746
  4146. - You were sleeping?
  4147. - Yes!
  4148.  
  4149. 901
  4150. 00:37:17,748 --> 00:37:19,514
  4151. I was micro napping.
  4152.  
  4153. 902
  4154. 00:37:19,516 --> 00:37:21,283
  4155. - That's what you call that?
  4156. - Yes.
  4157.  
  4158. 903
  4159. 00:37:21,285 --> 00:37:22,952
  4160. Sorry, I didn't realize
  4161. you were sleeping.
  4162.  
  4163. 904
  4164. 00:37:22,954 --> 00:37:24,520
  4165. You were standing
  4166. and your eyes were open.
  4167.  
  4168. 905
  4169. 00:37:24,522 --> 00:37:25,587
  4170. Do you need something?
  4171.  
  4172. 906
  4173. 00:37:25,589 --> 00:37:26,689
  4174. I have some jokes
  4175. that I wrote
  4176.  
  4177. 907
  4178. 00:37:26,691 --> 00:37:28,691
  4179. that I was gonna run by you
  4180. if you have a second.
  4181.  
  4182. 908
  4183. 00:37:28,693 --> 00:37:30,159
  4184. Yeah, that was actually
  4185. a really good nap.
  4186.  
  4187. 909
  4188. 00:37:30,161 --> 00:37:32,194
  4189. Great. Seemed very restful.
  4190.  
  4191. 910
  4192. 00:37:32,196 --> 00:37:33,197
  4193. Okay.
  4194.  
  4195. 911
  4196. 00:37:36,100 --> 00:37:37,032
  4197. Whoa.
  4198.  
  4199. 912
  4200. 00:37:37,034 --> 00:37:40,636
  4201. I feel like these jokes
  4202. are a little angry.
  4203.  
  4204. 913
  4205. 00:37:40,638 --> 00:37:42,938
  4206. Oh. I thought maybe
  4207. they were, like, emphatic?
  4208.  
  4209. 914
  4210. 00:37:42,940 --> 00:37:44,840
  4211. "With every
  4212. fracking drill thrust,
  4213.  
  4214. 915
  4215. 00:37:44,842 --> 00:37:47,676
  4216. "we are literally
  4217. butt-fucking Mother Earth"?
  4218.  
  4219. 916
  4220. 00:37:47,678 --> 00:37:48,844
  4221. It can be normal fucking.
  4222.  
  4223. 917
  4224. 00:37:48,846 --> 00:37:50,212
  4225. It doesn't have to be
  4226. in the butt.
  4227.  
  4228. 918
  4229. 00:37:50,214 --> 00:37:51,280
  4230. I can take that part out.
  4231.  
  4232. 919
  4233. 00:37:51,282 --> 00:37:52,848
  4234. Yeah, listen, Fred.
  4235.  
  4236. 920
  4237. 00:37:52,850 --> 00:37:54,249
  4238. If I'm angry,
  4239. I'm hysterical.
  4240.  
  4241. 921
  4242. 00:37:54,251 --> 00:37:55,851
  4243. If I'm emotional,
  4244. I'm weak.
  4245.  
  4246. 922
  4247. 00:37:55,853 --> 00:37:57,586
  4248. If I so much as
  4249. raise my voice, I'm a bitch.
  4250.  
  4251. 923
  4252. 00:37:57,588 --> 00:37:58,854
  4253. My job's hard.
  4254.  
  4255. 924
  4256. 00:37:58,856 --> 00:38:00,823
  4257. Not as hard as mine.
  4258.  
  4259. 925
  4260. 00:38:00,825 --> 00:38:02,624
  4261. I think maybe, like,
  4262. part of the problem
  4263.  
  4264. 926
  4265. 00:38:02,626 --> 00:38:04,893
  4266. is that, like, a lot of humor
  4267. is based on,
  4268.  
  4269. 927
  4270. 00:38:04,895 --> 00:38:07,029
  4271. like, personal experiences.
  4272.  
  4273. 928
  4274. 00:38:07,031 --> 00:38:07,930
  4275. I was thinking, you know,
  4276.  
  4277. 929
  4278. 00:38:07,932 --> 00:38:09,898
  4279. you cared a lot
  4280. about the environment
  4281.  
  4282. 930
  4283. 00:38:09,900 --> 00:38:11,066
  4284. - since high school.
  4285. - Mmm-hmm.
  4286.  
  4287. 931
  4288. 00:38:11,068 --> 00:38:14,803
  4289. So maybe include
  4290. some stories about that.
  4291.  
  4292. 932
  4293. 00:38:14,805 --> 00:38:16,173
  4294. - High school?
  4295. - Yeah.
  4296.  
  4297. 933
  4298. 00:38:17,742 --> 00:38:19,008
  4299. You think that's funny?
  4300.  
  4301. 934
  4302. 00:38:19,010 --> 00:38:20,109
  4303. I think it's a good area.
  4304.  
  4305. 935
  4306. 00:38:20,111 --> 00:38:22,177
  4307. Nostalgia,
  4308. pop culture references.
  4309.  
  4310. 936
  4311. 00:38:22,179 --> 00:38:23,279
  4312. People love that.
  4313.  
  4314. 937
  4315. 00:38:23,281 --> 00:38:25,114
  4316. Jimmy Fallon's made
  4317. an entire career off of that.
  4318.  
  4319. 938
  4320. 00:38:25,116 --> 00:38:27,283
  4321. When I think about school,
  4322. I just think about studying.
  4323.  
  4324. 939
  4325. 00:38:27,285 --> 00:38:28,884
  4326. No, you did
  4327. so much more than that.
  4328.  
  4329. 940
  4330. 00:38:28,886 --> 00:38:31,587
  4331. I think your whole 1991
  4332. platform was pretty on-point
  4333.  
  4334. 941
  4335. 00:38:31,589 --> 00:38:32,921
  4336. when you were running
  4337. for Student Council.
  4338.  
  4339. 942
  4340. 00:38:32,923 --> 00:38:35,758
  4341. I remember you said,
  4342. "Everyone at this school
  4343.  
  4344. 943
  4345. 00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:37,960
  4346. "pretends to care
  4347. about the underdog,
  4348.  
  4349. 944
  4350. 00:38:37,962 --> 00:38:39,129
  4351. "but the planet Earth is
  4352.  
  4353. 945
  4354. 00:38:39,131 --> 00:38:40,330
  4355. "the biggest underdog
  4356. of them all."
  4357.  
  4358. 946
  4359. 00:38:40,332 --> 00:38:41,630
  4360. Something like that.
  4361.  
  4362. 947
  4363. 00:38:41,632 --> 00:38:42,731
  4364. I said that?
  4365.  
  4366. 948
  4367. 00:38:42,733 --> 00:38:44,134
  4368. Yeah, you did say that.
  4369.  
  4370. 949
  4371. 00:38:44,136 --> 00:38:46,035
  4372. You were in the kitchen,
  4373. making pizza.
  4374.  
  4375. 950
  4376. 00:38:46,037 --> 00:38:48,837
  4377. We were making signs
  4378. for your election.
  4379.  
  4380. 951
  4381. 00:38:48,839 --> 00:38:51,074
  4382. And you were
  4383. wearing that shirt.
  4384.  
  4385. 952
  4386. 00:38:51,076 --> 00:38:53,042
  4387. I don't know if it was
  4388. a strawberry or a flower,
  4389.  
  4390. 953
  4391. 00:38:53,044 --> 00:38:54,279
  4392. it always confused me.
  4393.  
  4394. 954
  4395. 00:38:54,812 --> 00:38:55,878
  4396. It was both.
  4397.  
  4398. 955
  4399. 00:38:55,880 --> 00:38:57,813
  4400. Oh, there you go.
  4401.  
  4402. 956
  4403. 00:38:57,815 --> 00:38:59,648
  4404. That's all I remember
  4405. about that night, though.
  4406.  
  4407. 957
  4408. 00:38:59,650 --> 00:39:01,184
  4409. Uh, that's where my memories
  4410.  
  4411. 958
  4412. 00:39:01,186 --> 00:39:04,686
  4413. concerning that evening
  4414. expire.
  4415.  
  4416. 959
  4417. 00:39:04,688 --> 00:39:07,157
  4418. I learned a lot
  4419. from that election.
  4420.  
  4421. 960
  4422. 00:39:07,159 --> 00:39:08,724
  4423. Yeah, that kids are
  4424. probably more likely
  4425.  
  4426. 961
  4427. 00:39:08,726 --> 00:39:10,126
  4428. to vote for two proms
  4429.  
  4430. 962
  4431. 00:39:10,128 --> 00:39:12,628
  4432. than a very elaborate
  4433. recycling program.
  4434.  
  4435. 963
  4436. 00:39:12,630 --> 00:39:14,230
  4437. Not only kids.
  4438.  
  4439. 964
  4440. 00:39:14,232 --> 00:39:17,167
  4441. Yeah, that's true.
  4442.  
  4443. 965
  4444. 00:39:17,169 --> 00:39:21,004
  4445. Did you know he asked me out
  4446. to one of those proms?
  4447.  
  4448. 966
  4449. 00:39:21,006 --> 00:39:22,172
  4450. - Bill Sterling?
  4451. - Yeah.
  4452.  
  4453. 967
  4454. 00:39:22,174 --> 00:39:23,339
  4455. After he beat you?
  4456.  
  4457. 968
  4458. 00:39:23,341 --> 00:39:25,676
  4459. - Yup.
  4460. - Prom one or prom two?
  4461.  
  4462. 969
  4463. 00:39:27,012 --> 00:39:28,011
  4464. Oh!
  4465.  
  4466. 970
  4467. 00:39:28,013 --> 00:39:30,846
  4468. What a fuckhead!
  4469. You're way better than prom two.
  4470.  
  4471. 971
  4472. 00:39:31,950 --> 00:39:34,650
  4473. I went to zero proms,
  4474. by the way, for the record.
  4475.  
  4476. 972
  4477. 00:39:34,652 --> 00:39:36,752
  4478. I think you're the smart one
  4479. in this situation.
  4480.  
  4481. 973
  4482. 00:39:36,754 --> 00:39:38,855
  4483. Yes, that's why
  4484. I didn't go to prom.
  4485.  
  4486. 974
  4487. 00:39:38,857 --> 00:39:42,094
  4488. 'Cause I was too smart. Uh...
  4489.  
  4490. 975
  4491. 00:39:44,229 --> 00:39:47,163
  4492. Cool. I'll get to work on
  4493. that speech stuff.
  4494.  
  4495. 976
  4496. 00:39:47,165 --> 00:39:48,166
  4497. Great.
  4498.  
  4499. 977
  4500. 00:39:48,699 --> 00:39:49,765
  4501. Hey, Fred.
  4502.  
  4503. 978
  4504. 00:39:49,767 --> 00:39:51,733
  4505. Yeah.
  4506.  
  4507. 979
  4508. 00:39:51,735 --> 00:39:54,037
  4509. You know, if you want to try
  4510. some non-joke stuff,
  4511.  
  4512. 980
  4513. 00:39:54,039 --> 00:39:54,971
  4514. just go ahead.
  4515.  
  4516. 981
  4517. 00:39:54,973 --> 00:39:57,974
  4518. Really? Like the main part
  4519. of the speech?
  4520.  
  4521. 982
  4522. 00:39:57,976 --> 00:40:00,011
  4523. Yeah. Just write.
  4524.  
  4525. 983
  4526. 00:40:01,213 --> 00:40:02,881
  4527. Cool. Awesome. Thanks.
  4528.  
  4529. 984
  4530. 00:40:03,448 --> 00:40:04,613
  4531. If you take another nap,
  4532.  
  4533. 985
  4534. 00:40:04,615 --> 00:40:07,016
  4535. you should put on, like,
  4536. a bicycle helmet or something.
  4537.  
  4538. 986
  4539. 00:40:07,018 --> 00:40:08,918
  4540. 'Cause you're gonna tip over,
  4541. there's turbulence.
  4542.  
  4543. 987
  4544. 00:40:08,920 --> 00:40:10,687
  4545. That's actually
  4546. a really good idea.
  4547.  
  4548. 988
  4549. 00:40:10,689 --> 00:40:11,821
  4550. It is. I want you
  4551. to be careful.
  4552.  
  4553. 989
  4554. 00:40:11,823 --> 00:40:12,956
  4555. - Yeah.
  4556. - We need you.
  4557.  
  4558. 990
  4559. 00:40:29,307 --> 00:40:30,874
  4560. - Ambassador.
  4561. - Welcome to Sweden.
  4562.  
  4563. 991
  4564. 00:40:30,876 --> 00:40:32,175
  4565. Nice to see you again.
  4566.  
  4567. 992
  4568. 00:40:32,177 --> 00:40:33,178
  4569. Yeah, you too.
  4570.  
  4571. 993
  4572. 00:40:35,313 --> 00:40:36,880
  4573. I look forward to seeing you
  4574. tonight at dinner.
  4575.  
  4576. 994
  4577. 00:40:36,882 --> 00:40:37,981
  4578. Yes.
  4579.  
  4580. 995
  4581. 00:40:37,983 --> 00:40:39,349
  4582. Uh, Madam Secretary,
  4583.  
  4584. 996
  4585. 00:40:39,351 --> 00:40:40,717
  4586. I have some ideas
  4587. I wanna throw by you.
  4588.  
  4589. 997
  4590. 00:40:40,719 --> 00:40:41,918
  4591. Yeah, soon, Fred.
  4592.  
  4593. 998
  4594. 00:40:41,920 --> 00:40:43,153
  4595. Tom, do you have the schedule?
  4596.  
  4597. 999
  4598. 00:40:43,155 --> 00:40:44,856
  4599. - Yes, of course, ma'am.
  4600. - All right.
  4601.  
  4602. 1000
  4603. 00:40:47,926 --> 00:40:49,127
  4604. In the back, Flarsky!
  4605.  
  4606. 1001
  4607. 00:40:50,795 --> 00:40:52,195
  4608. Then at 8:15, you have
  4609. a fitting for tonight's gala.
  4610.  
  4611. 1002
  4612. 00:40:52,197 --> 00:40:55,131
  4613. Then at 8:45, a call with
  4614. Iraqi Prime Minister Masum,
  4615.  
  4616. 1003
  4617. 00:40:55,133 --> 00:40:57,200
  4618. 9:15, a call
  4619. to Brazilian President Temer
  4620.  
  4621. 1004
  4622. 00:40:57,202 --> 00:40:58,368
  4623. about deforestation issues.
  4624.  
  4625. 1005
  4626. 00:40:58,370 --> 00:41:01,771
  4627. 2:15, you have a call with
  4628. U.K. Foreign Secretary Green
  4629.  
  4630. 1006
  4631. 00:41:01,773 --> 00:41:03,973
  4632. to discuss your tour
  4633. of Scotland in a few weeks.
  4634.  
  4635. 1007
  4636. 00:41:03,975 --> 00:41:06,142
  4637. 2:25, then you have
  4638. a call with <i>New York Times</i>
  4639.  
  4640. 1008
  4641. 00:41:06,144 --> 00:41:08,378
  4642. to comment on POTUS'
  4643. latest Instagram attack
  4644.  
  4645. 1009
  4646. 00:41:08,380 --> 00:41:10,747
  4647. on Prime Minister Bharath
  4648. of Kashtar.
  4649.  
  4650. 1010
  4651. 00:41:10,749 --> 00:41:11,814
  4652. At 5:45,
  4653. we're meeting with the head
  4654.  
  4655. 1011
  4656. 00:41:11,816 --> 00:41:12,882
  4657. of Sweden's
  4658. Diplomatic Protocol,
  4659.  
  4660. 1012
  4661. 00:41:12,884 --> 00:41:15,818
  4662. Ingrid Minervudottir,
  4663. to discuss tonight's schedule.
  4664.  
  4665. 1013
  4666. 00:41:15,820 --> 00:41:17,120
  4667. Okay. And then after that?
  4668.  
  4669. 1014
  4670. 00:41:17,122 --> 00:41:18,422
  4671. Also, Parker Wembley
  4672. keeps trying to get
  4673.  
  4674. 1015
  4675. 00:41:18,424 --> 00:41:19,923
  4676. - some face time with you.
  4677. - Oh, God.
  4678.  
  4679. 1016
  4680. 00:41:19,925 --> 00:41:22,158
  4681. Parker can wait.
  4682. Okay, Fred. Go.
  4683.  
  4684. 1017
  4685. 00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:23,462
  4686. Yeah, sure. Um...
  4687.  
  4688. 1018
  4689. 00:41:24,129 --> 00:41:26,262
  4690. So, uh, you know,
  4691.  
  4692. 1019
  4693. 00:41:26,264 --> 00:41:28,097
  4694. based on what we were
  4695. talking about last night,
  4696.  
  4697. 1020
  4698. 00:41:28,099 --> 00:41:30,967
  4699. I just took a stab at
  4700. the whole speech, basically.
  4701.  
  4702. 1021
  4703. 00:41:30,969 --> 00:41:32,902
  4704. That's good.
  4705.  
  4706. 1022
  4707. 00:41:32,904 --> 00:41:35,472
  4708. - Thank you.
  4709. - This part isn't.
  4710.  
  4711. 1023
  4712. 00:41:35,474 --> 00:41:38,041
  4713. Okay, well, you said you
  4714. didn't want to sound too angry.
  4715.  
  4716. 1024
  4717. 00:41:38,043 --> 00:41:40,477
  4718. I also don't want to sound
  4719. like I have a head injury.
  4720.  
  4721. 1025
  4722. 00:41:40,479 --> 00:41:42,178
  4723. Okay. Uh,
  4724. I'll go change it.
  4725.  
  4726. 1026
  4727. 00:41:42,180 --> 00:41:43,547
  4728. Great. Thanks.
  4729.  
  4730. 1027
  4731. 00:41:43,549 --> 00:41:45,782
  4732. Okay, here we go.
  4733.  
  4734. 1028
  4735. 00:41:45,784 --> 00:41:47,183
  4736. So...
  4737.  
  4738. 1029
  4739. 00:41:47,185 --> 00:41:48,787
  4740. All right.
  4741.  
  4742. 1030
  4743. 00:41:49,854 --> 00:41:50,954
  4744. Fred.
  4745.  
  4746. 1031
  4747. 00:41:50,956 --> 00:41:52,389
  4748. Yeah?
  4749.  
  4750. 1032
  4751. 00:41:52,391 --> 00:41:54,926
  4752. Do you have any grown-up
  4753. clothes to wear tonight?
  4754.  
  4755. 1033
  4756. 00:41:59,030 --> 00:42:00,029
  4757. I was gonna...
  4758. I was thinking
  4759.  
  4760. 1034
  4761. 00:42:00,031 --> 00:42:02,299
  4762. of zipping this up
  4763. all the way, like to here.
  4764.  
  4765. 1035
  4766. 00:42:02,301 --> 00:42:03,234
  4767. That's kind of
  4768. a little more...
  4769.  
  4770. 1036
  4771. 00:42:03,236 --> 00:42:04,867
  4772. It's, like,
  4773. slightly more buttoned up.
  4774.  
  4775. 1037
  4776. 00:42:04,869 --> 00:42:05,902
  4777. You know what,
  4778. Madam Secretary,
  4779.  
  4780. 1038
  4781. 00:42:05,904 --> 00:42:09,939
  4782. I would be delighted
  4783. to dress Fred for tonight.
  4784.  
  4785. 1039
  4786. 00:42:09,941 --> 00:42:11,208
  4787. Thank you, Maggie.
  4788. I'd be thrilled
  4789.  
  4790. 1040
  4791. 00:42:11,210 --> 00:42:13,444
  4792. to have you dress me
  4793. for tonight's event.
  4794.  
  4795. 1041
  4796. 00:42:13,446 --> 00:42:14,545
  4797. What a fun adventure.
  4798.  
  4799. 1042
  4800. 00:42:14,547 --> 00:42:16,879
  4801. Get a little makeover.
  4802. All right, have a good one.
  4803.  
  4804. 1043
  4805. 00:42:16,881 --> 00:42:18,082
  4806. Thank you, Fred.
  4807.  
  4808. 1044
  4809. 00:42:18,084 --> 00:42:18,982
  4810. Why, thank you.
  4811.  
  4812. 1045
  4813. 00:42:18,984 --> 00:42:20,284
  4814. ...and then
  4815. it's saying hello,
  4816.  
  4817. 1046
  4818. 00:42:20,286 --> 00:42:21,418
  4819. you'll sit down,
  4820. we'll have dinner,
  4821.  
  4822. 1047
  4823. 00:42:21,420 --> 00:42:22,819
  4824. - I'll pull you up...
  4825. - Where's Flarsky?
  4826.  
  4827. 1048
  4828. 00:42:22,821 --> 00:42:23,920
  4829. Why are we waiting?
  4830.  
  4831. 1049
  4832. 00:42:23,922 --> 00:42:25,522
  4833. What, is he doing his hair?
  4834.  
  4835. 1050
  4836. 00:42:25,524 --> 00:42:27,126
  4837. Um...
  4838.  
  4839. 1051
  4840. 00:42:27,526 --> 00:42:29,293
  4841. Oh.
  4842.  
  4843. 1052
  4844. 00:42:29,295 --> 00:42:31,930
  4845. What the...
  4846.  
  4847. 1053
  4848. 00:42:36,102 --> 00:42:37,401
  4849. What the fuck
  4850. are you wearing?
  4851.  
  4852. 1054
  4853. 00:42:37,403 --> 00:42:39,436
  4854. She bought me
  4855. this shit. Okay?
  4856.  
  4857. 1055
  4858. 00:42:39,438 --> 00:42:41,238
  4859. It's a traditional
  4860. Swedish suit.
  4861.  
  4862. 1056
  4863. 00:42:41,240 --> 00:42:44,041
  4864. I don't see another
  4865. fucking Swede up in here
  4866.  
  4867. 1057
  4868. 00:42:44,043 --> 00:42:45,342
  4869. dressed like this.
  4870.  
  4871. 1058
  4872. 00:42:45,344 --> 00:42:47,544
  4873. It's all I could do
  4874. on such short notice.
  4875.  
  4876. 1059
  4877. 00:42:47,546 --> 00:42:50,214
  4878. You just take the jacket off,
  4879. it's going to make it better.
  4880.  
  4881. 1060
  4882. 00:42:50,216 --> 00:42:53,785
  4883. It's just... Make it look...
  4884. Oh, my God.
  4885.  
  4886. 1061
  4887. 00:42:56,389 --> 00:42:58,222
  4888. Better with
  4889. the jacket on? Great.
  4890.  
  4891. 1062
  4892. 00:42:58,224 --> 00:43:00,224
  4893. Razzing the new guy, I get it.
  4894. Fuck you, Maggie.
  4895.  
  4896. 1063
  4897. 00:43:00,226 --> 00:43:01,358
  4898. Calm the Smurf down.
  4899.  
  4900. 1064
  4901. 00:43:01,360 --> 00:43:02,428
  4902. Bring a fucking suit
  4903. next time.
  4904.  
  4905. 1065
  4906. 00:43:08,434 --> 00:43:09,500
  4907. Do you like the speech?
  4908.  
  4909. 1066
  4910. 00:43:09,502 --> 00:43:10,668
  4911. Yes, the speech is good.
  4912.  
  4913. 1067
  4914. 00:43:10,670 --> 00:43:13,170
  4915. Oh, you're going to have to
  4916. stay way back there, Fred.
  4917.  
  4918. 1068
  4919. 00:43:13,172 --> 00:43:14,938
  4920. Just stay back, Flarsky.
  4921. Okay? She's got to focus.
  4922.  
  4923. 1069
  4924. 00:43:14,940 --> 00:43:16,006
  4925. On what?
  4926.  
  4927. 1070
  4928. 00:43:16,008 --> 00:43:17,207
  4929. Getting India and China
  4930. to agree
  4931.  
  4932. 1071
  4933. 00:43:17,209 --> 00:43:18,275
  4934. to be a part
  4935. of this initiative.
  4936.  
  4937. 1072
  4938. 00:43:18,277 --> 00:43:20,611
  4939. They haven't even agreed
  4940. to be a part of it yet?
  4941.  
  4942. 1073
  4943. 00:43:20,613 --> 00:43:23,047
  4944. They will, we just have to
  4945. sort out a few details.
  4946.  
  4947. 1074
  4948. 00:43:23,049 --> 00:43:24,148
  4949. We just wrote
  4950. a whole speech
  4951.  
  4952. 1075
  4953. 00:43:24,150 --> 00:43:25,316
  4954. about how
  4955. they're on-board already.
  4956.  
  4957. 1076
  4958. 00:43:25,318 --> 00:43:26,519
  4959. Don't worry, Fred.
  4960.  
  4961. 1077
  4962. 00:43:27,520 --> 00:43:29,286
  4963. You just stay here
  4964. and make sure
  4965.  
  4966. 1078
  4967. 00:43:29,288 --> 00:43:32,489
  4968. nobody from <i>Candy Land</i>
  4969. needs their car parked, okay?
  4970.  
  4971. 1079
  4972. 00:43:32,491 --> 00:43:33,891
  4973. I don't know
  4974. why you needed a writer.
  4975.  
  4976. 1080
  4977. 00:43:33,893 --> 00:43:35,059
  4978. Those are sick burns.
  4979.  
  4980. 1081
  4981. 00:43:36,462 --> 00:43:38,962
  4982. Secretary of State
  4983. Charlotte Field
  4984.  
  4985. 1082
  4986. 00:43:38,964 --> 00:43:41,000
  4987. of the United States
  4988. of America.
  4989.  
  4990. 1083
  4991. 00:43:43,369 --> 00:43:45,235
  4992. Your Majesty.
  4993. Your Highness.
  4994.  
  4995. 1084
  4996. 00:43:45,237 --> 00:43:46,572
  4997. - Your Highness.
  4998. - Pleasure.
  4999.  
  5000. 1085
  5001. 00:43:52,545 --> 00:43:54,013
  5002. Oh.
  5003.  
  5004. 1086
  5005. 00:43:56,248 --> 00:43:58,616
  5006. No, thank you.
  5007. I'm working right now.
  5008.  
  5009. 1087
  5010. 00:43:58,618 --> 00:44:00,252
  5011. And you know you are, too.
  5012.  
  5013. 1088
  5014. 00:44:01,655 --> 00:44:02,787
  5015. I do know that.
  5016.  
  5017. 1089
  5018. 00:44:02,789 --> 00:44:05,189
  5019. But you dressed me like
  5020. Cap'n Crunch's Grindr date,
  5021.  
  5022. 1090
  5023. 00:44:05,191 --> 00:44:07,492
  5024. so I'm going to drink
  5025. to make you uncomfortable.
  5026.  
  5027. 1091
  5028. 00:44:07,494 --> 00:44:10,196
  5029. Honestly, Fred, your entire
  5030. life makes me uncomfortable.
  5031.  
  5032. 1092
  5033. 00:44:13,099 --> 00:44:14,532
  5034. Oh no, fuck me.
  5035.  
  5036. 1093
  5037. 00:44:17,036 --> 00:44:18,670
  5038. Yes.
  5039.  
  5040. 1094
  5041. 00:44:18,672 --> 00:44:22,272
  5042. We both shop in the same
  5043. mystical village, I see.
  5044.  
  5045. 1095
  5046. 00:44:22,274 --> 00:44:24,676
  5047. Yes, you look great.
  5048.  
  5049. 1096
  5050. 00:44:24,678 --> 00:44:26,043
  5051. - Congratulations.
  5052. - <i>Skal.</i>
  5053.  
  5054. 1097
  5055. 00:44:26,045 --> 00:44:27,612
  5056. <i>Skal. Skal</i> to you, too.
  5057.  
  5058. 1098
  5059. 00:44:27,614 --> 00:44:30,517
  5060. Yes.
  5061.  
  5062. 1099
  5063. 00:44:32,619 --> 00:44:33,620
  5064. Jesus.
  5065.  
  5066. 1100
  5067. 00:44:36,222 --> 00:44:39,223
  5068. Hey, we're making
  5069. a few revisions to the speech.
  5070.  
  5071. 1101
  5072. 00:44:39,225 --> 00:44:40,224
  5073. What?
  5074.  
  5075. 1102
  5076. 00:44:40,226 --> 00:44:42,394
  5077. So we're losing the "Seas" part,
  5078. so go cut that,
  5079.  
  5080. 1103
  5081. 00:44:42,396 --> 00:44:44,362
  5082. and then brainstorm
  5083. a couple of other funny lines
  5084.  
  5085. 1104
  5086. 00:44:44,364 --> 00:44:45,463
  5087. for the "Trees" section, okay?
  5088.  
  5089. 1105
  5090. 00:44:45,465 --> 00:44:46,698
  5091. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
  5092.  
  5093. 1106
  5094. 00:44:46,700 --> 00:44:49,367
  5095. Losing the Seas part, why?
  5096.  
  5097. 1107
  5098. 00:44:49,369 --> 00:44:50,769
  5099. Because India wouldn't go
  5100. for it. So we had to pivot.
  5101.  
  5102. 1108
  5103. 00:44:50,771 --> 00:44:53,538
  5104. That's not a pivot,
  5105. that's a third of the whole fucking shit.
  5106.  
  5107. 1109
  5108. 00:44:53,540 --> 00:44:56,006
  5109. Are you kidding me?
  5110. That's it, it's just gone?
  5111.  
  5112. 1110
  5113. 00:44:56,008 --> 00:44:57,107
  5114. Yeah, it's gone.
  5115.  
  5116. 1111
  5117. 00:44:57,109 --> 00:44:58,075
  5118. And there's nothing
  5119. we can do?
  5120.  
  5121. 1112
  5122. 00:44:58,077 --> 00:44:59,176
  5123. No. And you don't
  5124. have to worry about it.
  5125.  
  5126. 1113
  5127. 00:44:59,178 --> 00:45:03,214
  5128. Just go over to the computer.
  5129. Start typey-typing.
  5130.  
  5131. 1114
  5132. 00:45:03,216 --> 00:45:04,217
  5133. Well, no.
  5134.  
  5135. 1115
  5136. 00:45:05,218 --> 00:45:06,718
  5137. I'm not gonna do that.
  5138.  
  5139. 1116
  5140. 00:45:06,720 --> 00:45:08,620
  5141. So you quit,
  5142. resignation accepted.
  5143.  
  5144. 1117
  5145. 00:45:08,622 --> 00:45:10,188
  5146. I will rewrite the speech.
  5147.  
  5148. 1118
  5149. 00:45:10,190 --> 00:45:11,289
  5150. Oh, the fuck you will!
  5151.  
  5152. 1119
  5153. 00:45:11,291 --> 00:45:12,392
  5154. What the fuck?
  5155.  
  5156. 1120
  5157. 00:45:22,202 --> 00:45:23,637
  5158. - You don't...
  5159. - Let go!
  5160.  
  5161. 1121
  5162. 00:45:31,711 --> 00:45:32,811
  5163. Look out. Excuse me!
  5164.  
  5165. 1122
  5166. 00:45:32,813 --> 00:45:34,512
  5167. Stop running!
  5168. Stop running! Stop running!
  5169.  
  5170. 1123
  5171. 00:45:34,514 --> 00:45:35,613
  5172. Fred, stop running!
  5173.  
  5174. 1124
  5175. 00:45:38,285 --> 00:45:39,286
  5176. Fred...
  5177.  
  5178. 1125
  5179. 00:45:44,357 --> 00:45:45,423
  5180. Why did you do that?
  5181.  
  5182. 1126
  5183. 00:45:45,425 --> 00:45:47,358
  5184. Because I will not
  5185. have you damage
  5186.  
  5187. 1127
  5188. 00:45:47,360 --> 00:45:48,693
  5189. the integrity of my writing!
  5190.  
  5191. 1128
  5192. 00:45:48,695 --> 00:45:50,695
  5193. The integrity of your writing?
  5194.  
  5195. 1129
  5196. 00:45:50,697 --> 00:45:53,231
  5197. You're a punch-up writer,
  5198. you're not Maya Angelou!
  5199.  
  5200. 1130
  5201. 00:45:53,233 --> 00:45:54,732
  5202. What is going on?
  5203.  
  5204. 1131
  5205. 00:45:54,734 --> 00:45:56,434
  5206. What's going on
  5207. with you, bruh?
  5208.  
  5209. 1132
  5210. 00:45:56,436 --> 00:45:57,469
  5211. Did you just
  5212. call me "bruh"?
  5213.  
  5214. 1133
  5215. 00:45:57,471 --> 00:46:00,238
  5216. - She's the secretary of state.
  5217. - Is he high?
  5218.  
  5219. 1134
  5220. 00:46:00,240 --> 00:46:02,440
  5221. He is wasted,
  5222. but he's also just stupid.
  5223.  
  5224. 1135
  5225. 00:46:02,442 --> 00:46:04,110
  5226. Meet me in the conference
  5227. room, I'll handle this.
  5228.  
  5229. 1136
  5230. 00:46:06,813 --> 00:46:08,346
  5231. What's the deal, Fred?
  5232.  
  5233. 1137
  5234. 00:46:08,348 --> 00:46:11,149
  5235. What's the deal?
  5236. What's the deal? What are...
  5237.  
  5238. 1138
  5239. 00:46:11,151 --> 00:46:13,117
  5240. The only reason I'm here
  5241. is 'cause you told me
  5242.  
  5243. 1139
  5244. 00:46:13,119 --> 00:46:14,419
  5245. you cared about this shit,
  5246.  
  5247. 1140
  5248. 00:46:14,421 --> 00:46:16,688
  5249. and in the time I come
  5250. out here to have a smoke,
  5251.  
  5252. 1141
  5253. 00:46:16,690 --> 00:46:19,524
  5254. you fucking got rid of a massive
  5255. element of the whole thing.
  5256.  
  5257. 1142
  5258. 00:46:19,526 --> 00:46:22,828
  5259. I got two out of three.
  5260. I only lost one.
  5261.  
  5262. 1143
  5263. 00:46:22,830 --> 00:46:26,064
  5264. That one was the seas.
  5265.  
  5266. 1144
  5267. 00:46:26,066 --> 00:46:28,500
  5268. It covers 75% of the planet!
  5269.  
  5270. 1145
  5271. 00:46:28,502 --> 00:46:30,435
  5272. - It's a pretty big one!
  5273. - Bring down your voice.
  5274.  
  5275. 1146
  5276. 00:46:30,437 --> 00:46:31,536
  5277. You know why I'm upset?
  5278.  
  5279. 1147
  5280. 00:46:31,538 --> 00:46:33,638
  5281. This is exactly what I thought
  5282. was going to happen.
  5283.  
  5284. 1148
  5285. 00:46:33,640 --> 00:46:35,774
  5286. And I even said it.
  5287. I said it in your office.
  5288.  
  5289. 1149
  5290. 00:46:35,776 --> 00:46:38,543
  5291. I don't want to write
  5292. for some bullshit politician.
  5293.  
  5294. 1150
  5295. 00:46:38,545 --> 00:46:39,812
  5296. I wanted to write for you.
  5297.  
  5298. 1151
  5299. 00:46:39,814 --> 00:46:41,546
  5300. Because I thought you cared
  5301. about this shit.
  5302.  
  5303. 1152
  5304. 00:46:41,548 --> 00:46:44,349
  5305. Until you're running the game,
  5306. you have to play the game.
  5307.  
  5308. 1153
  5309. 00:46:44,351 --> 00:46:46,284
  5310. Well, then, by the time
  5311. you win the game,
  5312.  
  5313. 1154
  5314. 00:46:46,286 --> 00:46:49,420
  5315. you don't know who's scoring
  5316. touchdowns on whose nets,
  5317.  
  5318. 1155
  5319. 00:46:49,422 --> 00:46:51,289
  5320. and you don't know
  5321. who's hitting home runs
  5322.  
  5323. 1156
  5324. 00:46:51,291 --> 00:46:52,758
  5325. in whose fucking end zones!
  5326.  
  5327. 1157
  5328. 00:46:52,760 --> 00:46:54,325
  5329. - What are you talking about?
  5330. - I don't know sports.
  5331.  
  5332. 1158
  5333. 00:46:54,327 --> 00:46:55,560
  5334. Let me try it with food.
  5335.  
  5336. 1159
  5337. 00:46:55,562 --> 00:46:57,830
  5338. You wanna open a restaurant.
  5339. But all you got is chopsticks.
  5340.  
  5341. 1160
  5342. 00:46:57,832 --> 00:47:00,532
  5343. No! I don't have time
  5344. for this, okay?
  5345.  
  5346. 1161
  5347. 00:47:00,534 --> 00:47:03,234
  5348. If you want to quit,
  5349. then just fucking quit.
  5350.  
  5351. 1162
  5352. 00:47:03,236 --> 00:47:05,103
  5353. - I don't give a shit.
  5354. - Yeah, you don't give a shit.
  5355.  
  5356. 1163
  5357. 00:47:05,105 --> 00:47:06,137
  5358. - No, I don't.
  5359. - You used to fucking give a shit,
  5360.  
  5361. 1164
  5362. 00:47:06,139 --> 00:47:08,373
  5363. but now you don't
  5364. give a shit about anything.
  5365.  
  5366. 1165
  5367. 00:47:08,375 --> 00:47:10,108
  5368. You cared more about
  5369. recycling in high school
  5370.  
  5371. 1166
  5372. 00:47:10,110 --> 00:47:12,212
  5373. than you do this shit and it's
  5374. very disappointing to me.
  5375.  
  5376. 1167
  5377. 00:47:13,413 --> 00:47:15,714
  5378. Fuck this.
  5379. I've got a speech to give.
  5380.  
  5381. 1168
  5382. 00:47:15,716 --> 00:47:16,882
  5383. Oh, yeah, good luck
  5384. giving it,
  5385.  
  5386. 1169
  5387. 00:47:16,884 --> 00:47:18,216
  5388. it's on my computer
  5389. in the snow.
  5390.  
  5391. 1170
  5392. 00:47:18,218 --> 00:47:19,718
  5393. I have copies, you idiot.
  5394.  
  5395. 1171
  5396. 00:47:19,720 --> 00:47:22,088
  5397. You just threw your computer
  5398. in the snow, that's it.
  5399.  
  5400. 1172
  5401. 00:47:23,189 --> 00:47:25,458
  5402. Oh, no! Shit!
  5403.  
  5404. 1173
  5405. 00:47:26,627 --> 00:47:28,694
  5406. Oh, God damn it!
  5407.  
  5408. 1174
  5409. 00:47:28,696 --> 00:47:31,429
  5410. It's soaked!
  5411. I need a bowl of rice!
  5412.  
  5413. 1175
  5414. 00:47:31,431 --> 00:47:33,166
  5415. I need a big bowl of rice!
  5416.  
  5417. 1176
  5418. 00:47:34,502 --> 00:47:37,736
  5419. God damn it! Why didn't I
  5420. back this thing up?
  5421.  
  5422. 1177
  5423. 00:47:37,738 --> 00:47:39,306
  5424. All my shit's on here.
  5425.  
  5426. 1178
  5427. 00:47:49,650 --> 00:47:51,151
  5428. Fred. Look.
  5429.  
  5430. 1179
  5431. 00:47:54,855 --> 00:47:56,057
  5432. Wow.
  5433.  
  5434. 1180
  5435. 00:47:59,927 --> 00:48:02,095
  5436. I've never seen
  5437. anything like that.
  5438.  
  5439. 1181
  5440. 00:48:04,465 --> 00:48:05,466
  5441. No, I...
  5442.  
  5443. 1182
  5444. 00:48:06,400 --> 00:48:08,436
  5445. I've seen pictures of it,
  5446. but I never...
  5447.  
  5448. 1183
  5449. 00:48:09,637 --> 00:48:10,638
  5450. ...actually...
  5451.  
  5452. 1184
  5453. 00:48:12,573 --> 00:48:14,675
  5454. I never saw it.
  5455.  
  5456. 1185
  5457. 00:48:15,643 --> 00:48:17,278
  5458. Are you crying right now?
  5459.  
  5460. 1186
  5461. 00:48:18,211 --> 00:48:19,212
  5462. It's pretty.
  5463.  
  5464. 1187
  5465. 00:48:23,718 --> 00:48:24,719
  5466. Yeah.
  5467.  
  5468. 1188
  5469. 00:48:27,288 --> 00:48:28,289
  5470. Fred?
  5471.  
  5472. 1189
  5473. 00:48:28,723 --> 00:48:29,724
  5474. Yeah?
  5475.  
  5476. 1190
  5477. 00:48:31,225 --> 00:48:33,459
  5478. If you ever pull
  5479. some shit like that again,
  5480.  
  5481. 1191
  5482. 00:48:33,461 --> 00:48:34,795
  5483. I'll have you thrown in Gitmo.
  5484.  
  5485. 1192
  5486. 00:48:37,298 --> 00:48:39,166
  5487. Yes, Madam Secretary.
  5488. I'm sorry.
  5489.  
  5490. 1193
  5491. 00:48:40,901 --> 00:48:43,404
  5492. You better hope this fucking
  5493. speech goes over well.
  5494.  
  5495. 1194
  5496. 00:48:46,207 --> 00:48:50,409
  5497. I've often gravitated
  5498. toward the underdog.
  5499.  
  5500. 1195
  5501. 00:48:50,411 --> 00:48:54,847
  5502. The band of misfits who fight
  5503. back against the bullies.
  5504.  
  5505. 1196
  5506. 00:48:54,849 --> 00:48:57,718
  5507. In high school, I would talk
  5508. about the underdog a lot.
  5509.  
  5510. 1197
  5511. 00:48:59,453 --> 00:49:02,254
  5512. And I would often find myself
  5513. on a soapbox,
  5514.  
  5515. 1198
  5516. 00:49:02,256 --> 00:49:05,660
  5517. rambling on and on about
  5518. the injustices of the world.
  5519.  
  5520. 1199
  5521. 00:49:08,729 --> 00:49:11,296
  5522. Which makes you
  5523. extremely popular,
  5524.  
  5525. 1200
  5526. 00:49:11,298 --> 00:49:13,799
  5527. especially when everybody
  5528. would rather be watching
  5529.  
  5530. 1201
  5531. 00:49:13,801 --> 00:49:15,868
  5532. <i>Beverly Hills, 90210.</i>
  5533.  
  5534. 1202
  5535. 00:49:19,907 --> 00:49:22,574
  5536. But that is why I am happy
  5537. to announce
  5538.  
  5539. 1203
  5540. 00:49:22,576 --> 00:49:25,844
  5541. an initiative that would make
  5542. my 16-year-old self proud.
  5543.  
  5544. 1204
  5545. 00:49:25,846 --> 00:49:28,347
  5546. <i>In what is now being dubbed
  5547. "The Underdog Speech,"</i>
  5548.  
  5549. 1205
  5550. 00:49:28,349 --> 00:49:30,616
  5551. <i>the secretary of state
  5552. opened up about her childhood</i>
  5553.  
  5554. 1206
  5555. 00:49:30,618 --> 00:49:31,918
  5556. <i>and passion
  5557. for the environment</i>
  5558.  
  5559. 1207
  5560. 00:49:31,920 --> 00:49:34,520
  5561. <i>by announcing
  5562. a bold new initiative...</i>
  5563.  
  5564. 1208
  5565. 00:49:34,522 --> 00:49:37,623
  5566. <i>...turns out she has always
  5567. been an Andrea Zuckerman</i>
  5568.  
  5569. 1209
  5570. 00:49:37,625 --> 00:49:39,794
  5571. <i>in the body of a Kelly Taylor.</i>
  5572.  
  5573. 1210
  5574. 00:49:41,662 --> 00:49:43,464
  5575. - Hey.
  5576. - Hi.
  5577.  
  5578. 1211
  5579. 00:49:44,632 --> 00:49:46,331
  5580. Oh, wow, you shaved your neck.
  5581.  
  5582. 1212
  5583. 00:49:46,333 --> 00:49:47,599
  5584. I did. I cleaned it up.
  5585.  
  5586. 1213
  5587. 00:49:47,601 --> 00:49:49,803
  5588. Got my whole back.
  5589. Went all the way down.
  5590.  
  5591. 1214
  5592. 00:49:49,805 --> 00:49:50,970
  5593. Looks good.
  5594.  
  5595. 1215
  5596. 00:49:50,972 --> 00:49:52,806
  5597. Trying to make a good
  5598. impression, I guess, anyway...
  5599.  
  5600. 1216
  5601. 00:49:52,808 --> 00:49:54,874
  5602. I, uh...
  5603.  
  5604. 1217
  5605. 00:49:54,876 --> 00:49:58,377
  5606. I just wanted to apologize
  5607. to you, again,
  5608.  
  5609. 1218
  5610. 00:49:58,379 --> 00:50:01,714
  5611. for acting a little crazy,
  5612. you know.
  5613.  
  5614. 1219
  5615. 00:50:01,716 --> 00:50:03,382
  5616. I'm gonna...
  5617.  
  5618. 1220
  5619. 00:50:03,384 --> 00:50:04,616
  5620. I'm going to really try
  5621. to tone it down
  5622.  
  5623. 1221
  5624. 00:50:04,618 --> 00:50:08,289
  5625. and not, you know, make you
  5626. risk global, uh, humiliation.
  5627.  
  5628. 1222
  5629. 00:50:08,656 --> 00:50:09,758
  5630. Good. Great.
  5631.  
  5632. 1223
  5633. 00:50:10,391 --> 00:50:11,523
  5634. Also.
  5635.  
  5636. 1224
  5637. 00:50:11,525 --> 00:50:13,059
  5638. I googled speech writing
  5639.  
  5640. 1225
  5641. 00:50:13,061 --> 00:50:14,861
  5642. and it was
  5643. actually very informative.
  5644.  
  5645. 1226
  5646. 00:50:14,863 --> 00:50:15,829
  5647. What I learned
  5648.  
  5649. 1227
  5650. 00:50:15,831 --> 00:50:17,130
  5651. was that in order to write
  5652. better for you,
  5653.  
  5654. 1228
  5655. 00:50:17,132 --> 00:50:20,566
  5656. I should kinda get to know you
  5657. better and get in your head,
  5658.  
  5659. 1229
  5660. 00:50:20,568 --> 00:50:21,701
  5661. and everything
  5662. I already know about you,
  5663.  
  5664. 1230
  5665. 00:50:21,703 --> 00:50:22,902
  5666. I kinda used
  5667. on the first speech.
  5668.  
  5669. 1231
  5670. 00:50:22,904 --> 00:50:24,369
  5671. So, what I did
  5672.  
  5673. 1232
  5674. 00:50:24,371 --> 00:50:25,772
  5675. was I wrote a ton of questions
  5676.  
  5677. 1233
  5678. 00:50:25,774 --> 00:50:27,539
  5679. that will maybe help me
  5680. capture your voice,
  5681.  
  5682. 1234
  5683. 00:50:27,541 --> 00:50:28,842
  5684. if you have a minute.
  5685.  
  5686. 1235
  5687. 00:50:28,844 --> 00:50:30,710
  5688. I actually have seven.
  5689.  
  5690. 1236
  5691. 00:50:30,712 --> 00:50:32,879
  5692. Seven. Okay, great.
  5693. Yeah. I'll take it.
  5694.  
  5695. 1237
  5696. 00:50:32,881 --> 00:50:34,379
  5697. - All right.
  5698. - Seven minutes in heaven.
  5699.  
  5700. 1238
  5701. 00:50:34,381 --> 00:50:35,715
  5702. Um...
  5703.  
  5704. 1239
  5705. 00:50:35,717 --> 00:50:37,684
  5706. - Okay.
  5707. - So. Ah... I guess...
  5708.  
  5709. 1240
  5710. 00:50:37,686 --> 00:50:38,852
  5711. Just like...
  5712. What are you into?
  5713.  
  5714. 1241
  5715. 00:50:38,854 --> 00:50:40,053
  5716. What kind of shit you into?
  5717.  
  5718. 1242
  5719. 00:50:40,055 --> 00:50:41,921
  5720. Well, this is
  5721. pretty much it.
  5722.  
  5723. 1243
  5724. 00:50:41,923 --> 00:50:43,723
  5725. I mean,
  5726. secretary of state stuff.
  5727.  
  5728. 1244
  5729. 00:50:43,725 --> 00:50:46,025
  5730. Do you have any hobbies?
  5731. Anything? Do you watch TV?
  5732.  
  5733. 1245
  5734. 00:50:46,027 --> 00:50:47,660
  5735. Do you watch <i>Game of Thrones</i>
  5736. or anything like that?
  5737.  
  5738. 1246
  5739. 00:50:47,662 --> 00:50:49,361
  5740. Oh, I'm fully aware
  5741. of what happened
  5742.  
  5743. 1247
  5744. 00:50:49,363 --> 00:50:50,864
  5745. in every season
  5746. of <i>Game of Thrones.</i>
  5747.  
  5748. 1248
  5749. 00:50:50,866 --> 00:50:52,699
  5750. Because you watch it?
  5751.  
  5752. 1249
  5753. 00:50:52,701 --> 00:50:54,834
  5754. Because I read synopses
  5755. on every episode.
  5756.  
  5757. 1250
  5758. 00:50:54,836 --> 00:50:56,503
  5759. That can't actually work.
  5760.  
  5761. 1251
  5762. 00:50:56,505 --> 00:50:58,403
  5763. I couldn't believe
  5764. when Khaleesi's dragon
  5765.  
  5766. 1252
  5767. 00:50:58,405 --> 00:50:59,775
  5768. came back as a White Walker.
  5769.  
  5770. 1253
  5771. 00:51:00,442 --> 00:51:01,741
  5772. Whoa!
  5773.  
  5774. 1254
  5775. 00:51:01,743 --> 00:51:02,842
  5776. - See?
  5777. - What about movies?
  5778.  
  5779. 1255
  5780. 00:51:02,844 --> 00:51:04,110
  5781. Do you watch movies?
  5782.  
  5783. 1256
  5784. 00:51:04,112 --> 00:51:06,378
  5785. Synopses of all
  5786. the award contenders.
  5787.  
  5788. 1257
  5789. 00:51:06,380 --> 00:51:07,714
  5790. You used to love movies!
  5791.  
  5792. 1258
  5793. 00:51:07,716 --> 00:51:09,816
  5794. You made me watch
  5795. <i>Encino Man</i> 30 times.
  5796.  
  5797. 1259
  5798. 00:51:09,818 --> 00:51:12,452
  5799. "Wheeze a little juice!"
  5800.  
  5801. 1260
  5802. 00:51:12,454 --> 00:51:14,521
  5803. You still do the
  5804. worst Pauly Shore impression
  5805.  
  5806. 1261
  5807. 00:51:14,523 --> 00:51:16,356
  5808. in the history of mankind.
  5809.  
  5810. 1262
  5811. 00:51:16,358 --> 00:51:18,792
  5812. I can't believe you're
  5813. still doing "The Weasel"
  5814.  
  5815. 1263
  5816. 00:51:18,794 --> 00:51:20,426
  5817. and you haven't seen
  5818. any of the Marvel Universe.
  5819.  
  5820. 1264
  5821. 00:51:20,428 --> 00:51:23,365
  5822. Those movies are sick.
  5823. You're like frozen in time.
  5824.  
  5825. 1265
  5826. 00:51:23,965 --> 00:51:25,632
  5827. I am Encino Man.
  5828.  
  5829. 1266
  5830. 00:51:26,635 --> 00:51:29,469
  5831. All right, what is your
  5832. favorite book as a kid?
  5833.  
  5834. 1267
  5835. 00:51:29,471 --> 00:51:31,504
  5836. <i>The Velveteen Rabbit.</i> You?
  5837.  
  5838. 1268
  5839. 00:51:31,506 --> 00:51:32,839
  5840. <i>Fear and Loathing
  5841. in Las Vegas.</i>
  5842.  
  5843. 1269
  5844. 00:51:32,841 --> 00:51:35,008
  5845. - Oh, that explains a lot.
  5846. - Yeah.
  5847.  
  5848. 1270
  5849. 00:51:36,912 --> 00:51:39,412
  5850. I'm so sorry
  5851. for what we've done to you.
  5852.  
  5853. 1271
  5854. 00:51:39,414 --> 00:51:40,980
  5855. Best drug experience?
  5856.  
  5857. 1272
  5858. 00:51:40,982 --> 00:51:42,916
  5859. I could get summoned
  5860. at any moment
  5861.  
  5862. 1273
  5863. 00:51:42,918 --> 00:51:44,417
  5864. to deal with
  5865. an international crisis,
  5866.  
  5867. 1274
  5868. 00:51:44,419 --> 00:51:45,752
  5869. I can't do that on acid.
  5870.  
  5871. 1275
  5872. 00:51:45,754 --> 00:51:47,020
  5873. What about Molly?
  5874.  
  5875. 1276
  5876. 00:51:47,022 --> 00:51:48,154
  5877. Who's Molly?
  5878.  
  5879. 1277
  5880. 00:51:49,758 --> 00:51:51,457
  5881. <i>Secretary of State
  5882. Charlotte Field</i>
  5883.  
  5884. 1278
  5885. 00:51:51,459 --> 00:51:54,561
  5886. <i>continues on her impressive
  5887. 20-country world tour</i>
  5888.  
  5889. 1279
  5890. 00:51:54,563 --> 00:51:55,962
  5891. <i>to garner more support</i>
  5892.  
  5893. 1280
  5894. 00:51:55,964 --> 00:51:57,697
  5895. <i>for her ambitious
  5896. environmental initiative.</i>
  5897.  
  5898. 1281
  5899. 00:51:57,699 --> 00:51:59,532
  5900. <i>And all in a private jet,
  5901. no less.</i>
  5902.  
  5903. 1282
  5904. 00:51:59,534 --> 00:52:01,034
  5905. <i>You know what would
  5906. save the environment?</i>
  5907.  
  5908. 1283
  5909. 00:52:01,036 --> 00:52:02,836
  5910. <i>Charlotte Field
  5911. grounding her ass.</i>
  5912.  
  5913. 1284
  5914. 00:52:02,838 --> 00:52:04,437
  5915. <i>I know where I'd like
  5916. to ground her ass.</i>
  5917.  
  5918. 1285
  5919. 00:52:04,439 --> 00:52:06,773
  5920. <i>Oh, I walked
  5921. right into that one.</i>
  5922.  
  5923. 1286
  5924. 00:52:06,775 --> 00:52:08,975
  5925. <i>Must Have Been Love</i>
  5926. by Roxette.
  5927.  
  5928. 1287
  5929. 00:52:08,977 --> 00:52:11,511
  5930. - Oh! That's just fucking hot.
  5931. - Right?
  5932.  
  5933. 1288
  5934. 00:52:11,513 --> 00:52:12,979
  5935. - I got a new one.
  5936. - What?
  5937.  
  5938. 1289
  5939. 00:52:12,981 --> 00:52:14,414
  5940. I got to change
  5941. my favorite song.
  5942.  
  5943. 1290
  5944. 00:52:14,416 --> 00:52:16,049
  5945. - You have too many.
  5946. - I've done it a few times.
  5947.  
  5948. 1291
  5949. 00:52:16,051 --> 00:52:19,086
  5950. <i>Broccoli</i> by DRAM,
  5951. featuring Lil Yachty.
  5952.  
  5953. 1292
  5954. 00:52:19,088 --> 00:52:20,653
  5955. All those words
  5956.  
  5957. 1293
  5958. 00:52:20,655 --> 00:52:22,555
  5959. - are the name of a song?
  5960. - Yeah.
  5961.  
  5962. 1294
  5963. 00:52:22,557 --> 00:52:23,556
  5964. I don't
  5965. really think I have one.
  5966.  
  5967. 1295
  5968. 00:52:23,558 --> 00:52:25,825
  5969. You gotta have one.
  5970. Everyone has one.
  5971.  
  5972. 1296
  5973. 00:52:25,827 --> 00:52:27,794
  5974. Well, I don't embarrass
  5975. that easily.
  5976.  
  5977. 1297
  5978. 00:52:27,796 --> 00:52:29,696
  5979. Yeah, I hear that.
  5980. I don't either, really.
  5981.  
  5982. 1298
  5983. 00:52:29,698 --> 00:52:31,798
  5984. - Yes, you do.
  5985. - No, I don't!
  5986.  
  5987. 1299
  5988. 00:52:31,800 --> 00:52:34,734
  5989. Oh, my God. Okay.
  5990.  
  5991. 1300
  5992. 00:52:34,736 --> 00:52:36,973
  5993. What's your favorite
  5994. sexual position?
  5995.  
  5996. 1301
  5997. 00:52:38,640 --> 00:52:40,807
  5998. I mean, you know, front.
  5999.  
  6000. 1302
  6001. 00:52:40,809 --> 00:52:42,508
  6002. - Normal. Front facing normal.
  6003. - Oh, my God.
  6004.  
  6005. 1303
  6006. 00:52:42,510 --> 00:52:44,078
  6007. - What kinda question is that?
  6008. - That's all it took.
  6009.  
  6010. 1304
  6011. 00:52:44,080 --> 00:52:45,045
  6012. Look at you.
  6013.  
  6014. 1305
  6015. 00:52:45,047 --> 00:52:47,147
  6016. Well, what's your favorite
  6017. sexual position?
  6018.  
  6019. 1306
  6020. 00:52:47,149 --> 00:52:49,183
  6021. - Don't be gross, Fred. Hi.
  6022. - Yeah, see?
  6023.  
  6024. 1307
  6025. 00:52:49,185 --> 00:52:51,386
  6026. What's your favorite
  6027. sexual position?
  6028.  
  6029. 1308
  6030. 00:52:52,088 --> 00:52:53,890
  6031. It's too complicated
  6032. to explain.
  6033.  
  6034. 1309
  6035. 00:52:55,057 --> 00:52:56,825
  6036. - Really?
  6037. - I told you mine.
  6038.  
  6039. 1310
  6040. 00:52:57,525 --> 00:52:59,525
  6041. Oh, God, okay.
  6042.  
  6043. 1311
  6044. 00:52:59,527 --> 00:53:01,996
  6045. I just got back
  6046. from a trip to New Delhi.
  6047.  
  6048. 1312
  6049. 00:53:01,998 --> 00:53:03,964
  6050. - Yeah?
  6051. - I got called into a meeting
  6052.  
  6053. 1313
  6054. 00:53:03,966 --> 00:53:06,566
  6055. with the Joint Chiefs,
  6056. and I was a little nervous.
  6057.  
  6058. 1314
  6059. 00:53:06,568 --> 00:53:08,701
  6060. - Yeah.
  6061. - Yeah.
  6062.  
  6063. 1315
  6064. 00:53:08,703 --> 00:53:12,739
  6065. And my stomach was a little
  6066. weird from all the curry.
  6067.  
  6068. 1316
  6069. 00:53:12,741 --> 00:53:13,809
  6070. Oh, no.
  6071.  
  6072. 1317
  6073. 00:53:14,509 --> 00:53:15,477
  6074. Delhi belly.
  6075.  
  6076. 1318
  6077. 00:53:17,747 --> 00:53:21,714
  6078. Well, we were in a motorcade
  6079. and we couldn't stop.
  6080.  
  6081. 1319
  6082. 00:53:21,716 --> 00:53:23,052
  6083. - Oh, no.
  6084. - Mmm-hmm.
  6085.  
  6086. 1320
  6087. 00:53:23,853 --> 00:53:25,119
  6088. God...
  6089.  
  6090. 1321
  6091. 00:53:25,121 --> 00:53:29,123
  6092. I ruined a really nice
  6093. Dolce & Gabbana bag.
  6094.  
  6095. 1322
  6096. 00:53:29,125 --> 00:53:31,557
  6097. - You puked in it?
  6098. - Nope.
  6099.  
  6100. 1323
  6101. 00:53:31,559 --> 00:53:34,762
  6102. Oh, no!
  6103. In a moving vehicle?
  6104.  
  6105. 1324
  6106. 00:53:37,599 --> 00:53:39,833
  6107. Do you actually understand
  6108. what's happening right now?
  6109.  
  6110. 1325
  6111. 00:53:39,835 --> 00:53:42,236
  6112. Yes, I speak Russian.
  6113.  
  6114. 1326
  6115. 00:53:42,238 --> 00:53:44,705
  6116. The Russian
  6117. Samuel L. Jackson guy is dope.
  6118.  
  6119. 1327
  6120. 00:53:44,707 --> 00:53:47,076
  6121. <i>Do svidanya,</i>
  6122. motherfuckers!
  6123.  
  6124. 1328
  6125. 00:53:51,580 --> 00:53:53,914
  6126. Oh, my God, they just
  6127. shot the pirate guy!
  6128.  
  6129. 1329
  6130. 00:53:53,916 --> 00:53:55,149
  6131. But he's keeping
  6132. the team together.
  6133.  
  6134. 1330
  6135. 00:53:55,151 --> 00:53:56,216
  6136. I know.
  6137.  
  6138. 1331
  6139. 00:53:56,218 --> 00:53:57,618
  6140. I don't think
  6141. I can handle that.
  6142.  
  6143. 1332
  6144. 00:53:57,620 --> 00:53:58,686
  6145. - Oh, it's okay.
  6146. - No,
  6147.  
  6148. 1333
  6149. 00:53:58,688 --> 00:54:00,821
  6150. I really liked him
  6151. in the movie.
  6152.  
  6153. 1334
  6154. 00:54:00,823 --> 00:54:02,089
  6155. Don't worry,
  6156. just keep watching.
  6157.  
  6158. 1335
  6159. 00:54:02,091 --> 00:54:04,825
  6160. You know,
  6161. the Philippines gets a bad rap.
  6162.  
  6163. 1336
  6164. 00:54:04,827 --> 00:54:06,660
  6165. Because it's pretty nice here.
  6166.  
  6167. 1337
  6168. 00:54:06,662 --> 00:54:09,063
  6169. You'd never know civil war
  6170. was about to break out.
  6171.  
  6172. 1338
  6173. 00:54:09,065 --> 00:54:10,531
  6174. This is good.
  6175.  
  6176. 1339
  6177. 00:54:10,533 --> 00:54:11,699
  6178. - Oh, yeah?
  6179. - Yeah.
  6180.  
  6181. 1340
  6182. 00:54:11,701 --> 00:54:16,737
  6183. Hey. What if we use
  6184. this line to start with?
  6185.  
  6186. 1341
  6187. 00:54:16,739 --> 00:54:18,005
  6188. Yeah, "I'm going to
  6189. start this speech
  6190.  
  6191. 1342
  6192. 00:54:18,007 --> 00:54:19,606
  6193. "by saying the same thing
  6194. I said to my boss
  6195.  
  6196. 1343
  6197. 00:54:19,608 --> 00:54:22,076
  6198. "at Blockbuster Video
  6199. when I was 16.
  6200.  
  6201. 1344
  6202. 00:54:22,078 --> 00:54:23,277
  6203. "I quit."
  6204.  
  6205. 1345
  6206. 00:54:23,279 --> 00:54:25,713
  6207. - That's not bad.
  6208. - I love that.
  6209.  
  6210. 1346
  6211. 00:54:25,715 --> 00:54:27,681
  6212. This is really fucking good.
  6213.  
  6214. 1347
  6215. 00:54:27,683 --> 00:54:29,850
  6216. Look at you, you get me, Fred.
  6217.  
  6218. 1348
  6219. 00:54:29,852 --> 00:54:32,052
  6220. I totally get you.
  6221.  
  6222. 1349
  6223. 00:54:32,054 --> 00:54:33,887
  6224. <i>♪ All I want for my birthday</i>
  6225.  
  6226. 1350
  6227. 00:54:33,889 --> 00:54:35,723
  6228. <i>♪ Is a big booty ho</i>
  6229.  
  6230. 1351
  6231. 00:54:35,725 --> 00:54:37,191
  6232. <i>♪ All I want
  6233. for my birthday... ♪</i>
  6234.  
  6235. 1352
  6236. 00:54:37,193 --> 00:54:38,926
  6237. I couldn't be happier
  6238. that out of all the shit
  6239.  
  6240. 1353
  6241. 00:54:38,928 --> 00:54:40,728
  6242. I played you
  6243. from the last decade,
  6244.  
  6245. 1354
  6246. 00:54:40,730 --> 00:54:42,296
  6247. that what you've liked
  6248. the most is 2 Chainz.
  6249.  
  6250. 1355
  6251. 00:54:42,298 --> 00:54:44,698
  6252. - It's catchy.
  6253. - It's awesome.
  6254.  
  6255. 1356
  6256. 00:54:49,306 --> 00:54:52,174
  6257. So, are you, like, dating
  6258. the prime minister of Canada?
  6259.  
  6260. 1357
  6261. 00:54:54,677 --> 00:54:56,210
  6262. - No. No.
  6263. - No.
  6264.  
  6265. 1358
  6266. 00:54:56,212 --> 00:54:58,012
  6267. I feel like I read...
  6268. Did I read that
  6269.  
  6270. 1359
  6271. 00:54:58,014 --> 00:54:59,980
  6272. in some shitty tabloid
  6273. that you guys were dating?
  6274.  
  6275. 1360
  6276. 00:54:59,982 --> 00:55:02,816
  6277. - Maybe it's not true.
  6278. - No, I'm sure you did. It's...
  6279.  
  6280. 1361
  6281. 00:55:02,818 --> 00:55:05,652
  6282. They like to write about it,
  6283. but no. I...
  6284.  
  6285. 1362
  6286. 00:55:05,654 --> 00:55:08,655
  6287. We're not, we... We flirt.
  6288.  
  6289. 1363
  6290. 00:55:08,657 --> 00:55:10,057
  6291. - Yeah. Okay.
  6292. - Kind of.
  6293.  
  6294. 1364
  6295. 00:55:10,059 --> 00:55:12,762
  6296. It's weird.
  6297. We made out once.
  6298.  
  6299. 1365
  6300. 00:55:13,629 --> 00:55:14,697
  6301. Dope.
  6302.  
  6303. 1366
  6304. 00:55:15,031 --> 00:55:16,231
  6305. You asked.
  6306.  
  6307. 1367
  6308. 00:55:16,233 --> 00:55:18,299
  6309. No, hey! I've hooked up with
  6310.  
  6311. 1368
  6312. 00:55:18,301 --> 00:55:20,734
  6313. my fair share
  6314. of world leaders, too.
  6315.  
  6316. 1369
  6317. 00:55:20,736 --> 00:55:22,805
  6318. I 69'd Fidel Castro once.
  6319.  
  6320. 1370
  6321. 00:55:23,739 --> 00:55:25,007
  6322. You thought
  6323. his beard was big.
  6324.  
  6325. 1371
  6326. 00:55:25,741 --> 00:55:26,807
  6327. Um...
  6328.  
  6329. 1372
  6330. 00:55:26,809 --> 00:55:29,843
  6331. But how does that work
  6332. with you? Do you, like...
  6333.  
  6334. 1373
  6335. 00:55:29,845 --> 00:55:31,779
  6336. Do you, like, date?
  6337.  
  6338. 1374
  6339. 00:55:31,781 --> 00:55:35,584
  6340. Uh... Yeah. I date.
  6341.  
  6342. 1375
  6343. 00:55:36,286 --> 00:55:38,219
  6344. Generally, you know,
  6345.  
  6346. 1376
  6347. 00:55:38,221 --> 00:55:40,754
  6348. with people who have
  6349. similar lifestyles to me.
  6350.  
  6351. 1377
  6352. 00:55:40,756 --> 00:55:42,259
  6353. People who travel a lot.
  6354.  
  6355. 1378
  6356. 00:55:44,194 --> 00:55:47,863
  6357. It's hard to keep
  6358. those things alive. I...
  6359.  
  6360. 1379
  6361. 00:55:49,199 --> 00:55:51,632
  6362. I mean, who wants to
  6363. follow me around the world
  6364.  
  6365. 1380
  6366. 00:55:51,634 --> 00:55:53,970
  6367. and hope I have five minutes
  6368. to be affectionate?
  6369.  
  6370. 1381
  6371. 00:55:54,870 --> 00:55:56,237
  6372. - Yeah.
  6373. - And honestly,
  6374.  
  6375. 1382
  6376. 00:55:56,239 --> 00:55:58,006
  6377. guys don't really
  6378. want to date women
  6379.  
  6380. 1383
  6381. 00:55:58,008 --> 00:55:59,307
  6382. who are more powerful
  6383. than them.
  6384.  
  6385. 1384
  6386. 00:55:59,309 --> 00:56:00,910
  6387. They think they do, but...
  6388.  
  6389. 1385
  6390. 00:56:02,179 --> 00:56:04,012
  6391. It's a dick shriveller.
  6392.  
  6393. 1386
  6394. 00:56:04,014 --> 00:56:06,114
  6395. - Uff.
  6396. - Mmm-hmm.
  6397.  
  6398. 1387
  6399. 00:56:06,116 --> 00:56:08,349
  6400. Dick Shriveller is my favorite
  6401. Batman villain though.
  6402.  
  6403. 1388
  6404. 00:56:08,351 --> 00:56:10,053
  6405. So...
  6406.  
  6407. 1389
  6408. 00:56:11,754 --> 00:56:13,687
  6409. You gonna ask
  6410. why I'm still single?
  6411.  
  6412. 1390
  6413. 00:56:13,689 --> 00:56:16,191
  6414. No, I get it.
  6415.  
  6416. 1391
  6417. 00:56:16,193 --> 00:56:18,295
  6418. - It makes sense.
  6419. - Yeah. It adds up.
  6420.  
  6421. 1392
  6422. 00:56:28,038 --> 00:56:29,170
  6423. We're right in front
  6424. of the window.
  6425.  
  6426. 1393
  6427. 00:56:31,174 --> 00:56:32,774
  6428. What the fuck is happening?
  6429.  
  6430. 1394
  6431. 00:56:32,776 --> 00:56:34,409
  6432. Insurgents are fighting
  6433. the army.
  6434.  
  6435. 1395
  6436. 00:56:34,411 --> 00:56:36,311
  6437. - Are we in danger?
  6438. - Yes! Yes!
  6439.  
  6440. 1396
  6441. 00:56:36,313 --> 00:56:37,979
  6442. Madam Secretary,
  6443. we need to leave now!
  6444.  
  6445. 1397
  6446. 00:56:37,981 --> 00:56:39,314
  6447. Fuck!
  6448.  
  6449. 1398
  6450. 00:56:39,316 --> 00:56:40,683
  6451. This way!
  6452.  
  6453. 1399
  6454. 00:56:42,052 --> 00:56:44,052
  6455. All right, guys, come with me.
  6456.  
  6457. 1400
  6458. 00:56:44,054 --> 00:56:45,654
  6459. Come on.
  6460.  
  6461. 1401
  6462. 00:57:10,013 --> 00:57:11,146
  6463. Secretary Field, this way!
  6464.  
  6465. 1402
  6466. 00:57:11,148 --> 00:57:13,116
  6467. I got her, secure them!
  6468.  
  6469. 1403
  6470. 00:57:14,117 --> 00:57:15,185
  6471. This way.
  6472.  
  6473. 1404
  6474. 00:57:18,722 --> 00:57:19,890
  6475. You'll be safe in here.
  6476.  
  6477. 1405
  6478. 00:57:21,191 --> 00:57:23,224
  6479. Oh, fuck! Are you okay?
  6480.  
  6481. 1406
  6482. 00:57:23,226 --> 00:57:24,225
  6483. Yeah, I'm okay. Are you okay?
  6484.  
  6485. 1407
  6486. 00:57:24,227 --> 00:57:26,227
  6487. I'm okay. Yeah.
  6488. We're okay. Okay.
  6489.  
  6490. 1408
  6491. 00:57:26,229 --> 00:57:30,231
  6492. - Okay.
  6493. - Okay. Okay. Holy shit!
  6494.  
  6495. 1409
  6496. 00:57:30,233 --> 00:57:33,468
  6497. Oh,
  6498. we could have just died.
  6499.  
  6500. 1410
  6501. 00:57:33,470 --> 00:57:36,271
  6502. Oh, my God, I'm freaking out
  6503. a bit right now.
  6504.  
  6505. 1411
  6506. 00:57:36,273 --> 00:57:37,338
  6507. I'm having a hard time
  6508.  
  6509. 1412
  6510. 00:57:37,340 --> 00:57:38,474
  6511. catching my breath
  6512. a little bit.
  6513.  
  6514. 1413
  6515. 00:57:38,476 --> 00:57:39,542
  6516. You don't seem like you're
  6517. freaking out very much.
  6518.  
  6519. 1414
  6520. 00:57:39,544 --> 00:57:42,877
  6521. I am! I'm employing
  6522. a Navy SEAL breathing technique,
  6523.  
  6524. 1415
  6525. 00:57:42,879 --> 00:57:44,145
  6526. for dealing with panicking.
  6527.  
  6528. 1416
  6529. 00:57:44,147 --> 00:57:46,381
  6530. It's just gonna take about
  6531. 90 seconds to work.
  6532.  
  6533. 1417
  6534. 00:57:46,383 --> 00:57:49,350
  6535. 90 seconds? I need more than
  6536. fucking 90 seconds!
  6537.  
  6538. 1418
  6539. 00:57:49,352 --> 00:57:51,085
  6540. I need 90 fucking years!
  6541.  
  6542. 1419
  6543. 00:57:51,087 --> 00:57:53,788
  6544. I'm fucked up for life
  6545. from this shit, yo!
  6546.  
  6547. 1420
  6548. 00:57:53,790 --> 00:57:56,525
  6549. I have so many regrets,
  6550. did so many terrible things!
  6551.  
  6552. 1421
  6553. 00:57:56,527 --> 00:57:59,961
  6554. When I was 12, I peed on a dog
  6555. to impress an older kid.
  6556.  
  6557. 1422
  6558. 00:57:59,963 --> 00:58:02,265
  6559. The dog didn't like it.
  6560. The older kid didn't either!
  6561.  
  6562. 1423
  6563. 00:58:03,133 --> 00:58:04,199
  6564. It was just pointless.
  6565.  
  6566. 1424
  6567. 00:58:04,201 --> 00:58:05,967
  6568. What the fuck?
  6569.  
  6570. 1425
  6571. 00:58:05,969 --> 00:58:08,038
  6572. Holy shit! Fuck!
  6573.  
  6574. 1426
  6575. 00:58:09,139 --> 00:58:11,340
  6576. Is there more? Is there
  6577. gonna be more?
  6578.  
  6579. 1427
  6580. 00:58:11,342 --> 00:58:12,541
  6581. - Fred.
  6582. - Is there more?
  6583.  
  6584. 1428
  6585. 00:58:12,543 --> 00:58:13,942
  6586. You're gonna
  6587. have to calm down.
  6588.  
  6589. 1429
  6590. 00:58:13,944 --> 00:58:15,176
  6591. I don't think I can.
  6592.  
  6593. 1430
  6594. 00:58:15,178 --> 00:58:16,978
  6595. Sit down with me.
  6596.  
  6597. 1431
  6598. 00:58:16,980 --> 00:58:18,112
  6599. And breathe.
  6600.  
  6601. 1432
  6602. 00:58:18,114 --> 00:58:20,482
  6603. Four seconds in.
  6604.  
  6605. 1433
  6606. 00:58:20,484 --> 00:58:21,550
  6607. Four seconds out.
  6608.  
  6609. 1434
  6610. 00:58:21,552 --> 00:58:23,385
  6611. Four seconds in.
  6612.  
  6613. 1435
  6614. 00:58:23,387 --> 00:58:25,053
  6615. One, two, three, four...
  6616.  
  6617. 1436
  6618. 00:58:25,055 --> 00:58:27,922
  6619. - Four seconds out.
  6620. - One, two...
  6621.  
  6622. 1437
  6623. 00:58:27,924 --> 00:58:30,792
  6624. - Four seconds in.
  6625. - One, two, three, four...
  6626.  
  6627. 1438
  6628. 00:58:30,794 --> 00:58:32,294
  6629. You don't have to count
  6630. while you're doing this.
  6631.  
  6632. 1439
  6633. 00:58:32,296 --> 00:58:33,429
  6634. ...four. It helps me.
  6635.  
  6636. 1440
  6637. 00:58:33,431 --> 00:58:37,131
  6638. - One, two, three, four...
  6639. - There you go.
  6640.  
  6641. 1441
  6642. 00:58:37,133 --> 00:58:39,468
  6643. One, two, three, four.
  6644.  
  6645. 1442
  6646. 00:58:39,470 --> 00:58:41,372
  6647. One, two, three, four.
  6648.  
  6649. 1443
  6650. 00:58:42,240 --> 00:58:44,040
  6651. One, two, three, four.
  6652.  
  6653. 1444
  6654. 00:58:45,243 --> 00:58:47,278
  6655. - You got it.
  6656. - That actually works.
  6657.  
  6658. 1445
  6659. 00:58:48,312 --> 00:58:49,846
  6660. Those guys are good.
  6661.  
  6662. 1446
  6663. 00:58:54,418 --> 00:58:56,118
  6664. We did almost just die,
  6665. though.
  6666.  
  6667. 1447
  6668. 00:58:56,120 --> 00:58:57,186
  6669. We actually did almost die.
  6670.  
  6671. 1448
  6672. 00:58:57,188 --> 00:58:58,853
  6673. - Yeah.
  6674. - Oh, thank God.
  6675.  
  6676. 1449
  6677. 00:58:58,855 --> 00:58:59,988
  6678. That actually
  6679. makes me feel better.
  6680.  
  6681. 1450
  6682. 00:58:59,990 --> 00:59:01,123
  6683. Means I didn't overreact.
  6684.  
  6685. 1451
  6686. 00:59:01,125 --> 00:59:03,860
  6687. Oh, God, no, you completely
  6688. overreacted.
  6689.  
  6690. 1452
  6691. 00:59:04,928 --> 00:59:06,097
  6692. Yeah, maybe.
  6693.  
  6694. 1453
  6695. 00:59:08,599 --> 00:59:10,401
  6696. I can think of worse ways
  6697. to go
  6698.  
  6699. 1454
  6700. 00:59:11,469 --> 00:59:13,137
  6701. than here with you.
  6702.  
  6703. 1455
  6704. 00:59:14,472 --> 00:59:16,372
  6705. Honestly, this has been like,
  6706.  
  6707. 1456
  6708. 00:59:16,374 --> 00:59:19,176
  6709. the best few weeks
  6710. of my entire life.
  6711.  
  6712. 1457
  6713. 00:59:22,546 --> 00:59:23,878
  6714. You don't have to say it
  6715. back to me.
  6716.  
  6717. 1458
  6718. 00:59:23,880 --> 00:59:25,147
  6719. I know it's not true for you.
  6720.  
  6721. 1459
  6722. 00:59:25,149 --> 00:59:27,182
  6723. I saw you sing with
  6724. Bruce Springsteen last year,
  6725.  
  6726. 1460
  6727. 00:59:27,184 --> 00:59:28,550
  6728. at that benefit concert.
  6729. That was probably
  6730.  
  6731. 1461
  6732. 00:59:28,552 --> 00:59:30,019
  6733. a way better week.
  6734.  
  6735. 1462
  6736. 00:59:30,021 --> 00:59:32,854
  6737. Just as an example.
  6738.  
  6739. 1463
  6740. 00:59:32,856 --> 00:59:35,291
  6741. Well, this is
  6742. a pretty close second.
  6743.  
  6744. 1464
  6745. 00:59:35,293 --> 00:59:37,393
  6746. Really? To The Boss?
  6747.  
  6748. 1465
  6749. 00:59:37,395 --> 00:59:38,460
  6750. Yeah.
  6751.  
  6752. 1466
  6753. 00:59:38,462 --> 00:59:40,797
  6754. Wow. That's nice.
  6755.  
  6756. 1467
  6757. 00:59:47,438 --> 00:59:48,806
  6758. Uh...
  6759.  
  6760. 1468
  6761. 00:59:54,478 --> 00:59:57,546
  6762. I feel like maybe you want me
  6763. to kiss you right now,
  6764.  
  6765. 1469
  6766. 00:59:57,548 --> 00:59:59,515
  6767. but I don't want to make
  6768. the same stupid mistake
  6769.  
  6770. 1470
  6771. 00:59:59,517 --> 01:00:00,949
  6772. I made 25 years ago.
  6773.  
  6774. 1471
  6775. 01:00:00,951 --> 01:00:02,820
  6776. Wouldn't be a stupid mistake.
  6777.  
  6778. 1472
  6779. 01:00:03,521 --> 01:00:05,122
  6780. Wait... Really?
  6781.  
  6782. 1473
  6783. 01:00:11,662 --> 01:00:13,262
  6784. We've secured the location.
  6785.  
  6786. 1474
  6787. 01:00:13,264 --> 01:00:16,133
  6788. But we need to move you.
  6789. The helicopter is standing by.
  6790.  
  6791. 1475
  6792. 01:00:17,234 --> 01:00:18,936
  6793. Thank you, Agent M.
  6794.  
  6795. 1476
  6796. 01:00:23,507 --> 01:00:24,907
  6797. Holy shit.
  6798.  
  6799. 1477
  6800. 01:00:24,909 --> 01:00:25,974
  6801. That helicopter was way louder
  6802.  
  6803. 1478
  6804. 01:00:25,976 --> 01:00:27,376
  6805. than I thought
  6806. it was gonna be.
  6807.  
  6808. 1479
  6809. 01:00:27,378 --> 01:00:29,347
  6810. - Fred, enough. Enough.
  6811. - I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
  6812.  
  6813. 1480
  6814. 01:00:30,214 --> 01:00:31,313
  6815. We're safe here though?
  6816.  
  6817. 1481
  6818. 01:00:31,315 --> 01:00:32,981
  6819. - Yes!
  6820. - Oh, my God, Fred!
  6821.  
  6822. 1482
  6823. 01:00:32,983 --> 01:00:34,049
  6824. This way.
  6825.  
  6826. 1483
  6827. 01:00:34,051 --> 01:00:35,286
  6828. This place
  6829. looks really nice.
  6830.  
  6831. 1484
  6832. 01:00:39,223 --> 01:00:40,690
  6833. Fred, I need you
  6834. to come work
  6835.  
  6836. 1485
  6837. 01:00:40,692 --> 01:00:42,524
  6838. on that speech with me,
  6839. right now.
  6840.  
  6841. 1486
  6842. 01:00:42,526 --> 01:00:44,596
  6843. - Right now?
  6844. - Yeah. Right now.
  6845.  
  6846. 1487
  6847. 01:00:45,463 --> 01:00:46,565
  6848. Okay.
  6849.  
  6850. 1488
  6851. 01:00:52,937 --> 01:00:54,103
  6852. Hang on, get my pants off.
  6853.  
  6854. 1489
  6855. 01:00:54,105 --> 01:00:55,439
  6856. Okay, I gotta, too. Shit.
  6857.  
  6858. 1490
  6859. 01:00:56,941 --> 01:00:58,340
  6860. - We're doing it?
  6861. - Yeah!
  6862.  
  6863. 1491
  6864. 01:00:58,342 --> 01:00:59,408
  6865. - Do it faster.
  6866. - Let's do it.
  6867.  
  6868. 1492
  6869. 01:00:59,410 --> 01:01:00,411
  6870. They're coming off!
  6871.  
  6872. 1493
  6873. 01:01:02,380 --> 01:01:04,382
  6874. Fucking tapered pants. Shit!
  6875.  
  6876. 1494
  6877. 01:01:05,717 --> 01:01:06,917
  6878. Fuck!
  6879.  
  6880. 1495
  6881. 01:01:08,420 --> 01:01:10,085
  6882. Okay, just leave
  6883. it! Just leave it! Leave it!
  6884.  
  6885. 1496
  6886. 01:01:10,087 --> 01:01:11,554
  6887. - Okay.
  6888. - Okay. Yeah.
  6889.  
  6890. 1497
  6891. 01:01:11,556 --> 01:01:12,622
  6892. Should I go in, then?
  6893.  
  6894. 1498
  6895. 01:01:12,624 --> 01:01:14,289
  6896. Yeah, enter.
  6897.  
  6898. 1499
  6899. 01:01:14,291 --> 01:01:17,560
  6900. Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, no!
  6901.  
  6902. 1500
  6903. 01:01:17,562 --> 01:01:19,696
  6904. - I'm gonna come really soon.
  6905. - Me too.
  6906.  
  6907. 1501
  6908. 01:01:19,698 --> 01:01:21,163
  6909. - Really?
  6910. - Yeah!
  6911.  
  6912. 1502
  6913. 01:01:21,165 --> 01:01:22,231
  6914. - Oh, God!
  6915. - Oh!
  6916.  
  6917. 1503
  6918. 01:01:22,233 --> 01:01:23,633
  6919. Oh, boy!
  6920.  
  6921. 1504
  6922. 01:01:26,471 --> 01:01:29,406
  6923. - Oh, God! Okay.
  6924. - Oh, my God!
  6925.  
  6926. 1505
  6927. 01:01:29,408 --> 01:01:31,307
  6928. - I'm coming out.
  6929. - Okay, come on.
  6930.  
  6931. 1506
  6932. 01:01:31,309 --> 01:01:37,112
  6933. Oh, God. Oh! Oh! Oh, fuck!
  6934.  
  6935. 1507
  6936. 01:01:37,114 --> 01:01:40,352
  6937. Wow. Oh, my God,
  6938. I'm sorry.
  6939.  
  6940. 1508
  6941. 01:01:41,253 --> 01:01:42,452
  6942. I don't know
  6943. what happened.
  6944.  
  6945. 1509
  6946. 01:01:42,454 --> 01:01:44,654
  6947. I usually last
  6948. way longer than that.
  6949.  
  6950. 1510
  6951. 01:01:44,656 --> 01:01:46,056
  6952. - You know?
  6953. - Not me.
  6954.  
  6955. 1511
  6956. 01:01:47,091 --> 01:01:48,023
  6957. That was weird.
  6958.  
  6959. 1512
  6960. 01:01:48,025 --> 01:01:49,225
  6961. We both said, "Oh, boy"
  6962. when we came...
  6963.  
  6964. 1513
  6965. 01:01:49,227 --> 01:01:51,194
  6966. - Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
  6967. - ...at the same time.
  6968.  
  6969. 1514
  6970. 01:01:51,196 --> 01:01:52,729
  6971. - That's never happened before.
  6972. - I've never said that.
  6973.  
  6974. 1515
  6975. 01:01:52,731 --> 01:01:55,998
  6976. - Yeah.
  6977. - Super strange.
  6978.  
  6979. 1516
  6980. 01:01:56,000 --> 01:01:57,700
  6981. - Oh!
  6982. - Should we do that again?
  6983.  
  6984. 1517
  6985. 01:01:57,702 --> 01:01:59,369
  6986. Yeah, my hands are shaking,
  6987. I need a minute.
  6988.  
  6989. 1518
  6990. 01:02:04,074 --> 01:02:05,708
  6991. Hmm.
  6992.  
  6993. 1519
  6994. 01:02:05,710 --> 01:02:08,645
  6995. Who's this little guy?
  6996.  
  6997. 1520
  6998. 01:02:08,647 --> 01:02:10,547
  6999. I was a writing an article
  7000. about neo-Nazis
  7001.  
  7002. 1521
  7003. 01:02:10,549 --> 01:02:12,282
  7004. and I had to get a bottom half
  7005.  
  7006. 1522
  7007. 01:02:12,284 --> 01:02:13,716
  7008. of a swastika
  7009. tattooed on me...
  7010.  
  7011. 1523
  7012. 01:02:13,718 --> 01:02:15,552
  7013. - Oh, my God.
  7014. - ...so they wouldn't kill me
  7015.  
  7016. 1524
  7017. 01:02:15,554 --> 01:02:17,554
  7018. and I didn't want that,
  7019.  
  7020. 1525
  7021. 01:02:17,556 --> 01:02:20,690
  7022. so I added little shoes and
  7023. I made him a little stick man
  7024.  
  7025. 1526
  7026. 01:02:20,692 --> 01:02:24,160
  7027. and I named him
  7028. Adolf Stickler.
  7029.  
  7030. 1527
  7031. 01:02:24,162 --> 01:02:26,229
  7032. You'd never know
  7033. he had little swastika legs.
  7034.  
  7035. 1528
  7036. 01:02:26,231 --> 01:02:27,697
  7037. - No.
  7038. - He's so happy about it.
  7039.  
  7040. 1529
  7041. 01:02:27,699 --> 01:02:28,765
  7042. I know, they just
  7043. look like pants.
  7044.  
  7045. 1530
  7046. 01:02:28,767 --> 01:02:31,401
  7047. You'd never know he was born
  7048. in the fires of hatred.
  7049.  
  7050. 1531
  7051. 01:02:34,806 --> 01:02:36,608
  7052. Man, I am hungry.
  7053.  
  7054. 1532
  7055. 01:02:39,244 --> 01:02:40,743
  7056. What time is it?
  7057.  
  7058. 1533
  7059. 01:02:40,745 --> 01:02:43,415
  7060. I couldn't tell you
  7061. what fucking day it is.
  7062.  
  7063. 1534
  7064. 01:02:44,549 --> 01:02:47,517
  7065. And where...
  7066. Where are we right now?
  7067.  
  7068. 1535
  7069. 01:02:47,519 --> 01:02:48,818
  7070. I don't have a clue.
  7071.  
  7072. 1536
  7073. 01:02:48,820 --> 01:02:50,086
  7074. You don't know?
  7075.  
  7076. 1537
  7077. 01:02:50,088 --> 01:02:51,287
  7078. No. They just
  7079. dropped us here.
  7080.  
  7081. 1538
  7082. 01:02:51,289 --> 01:02:53,558
  7083. They just took us here
  7084. on the helicopter.
  7085.  
  7086. 1539
  7087. 01:03:15,647 --> 01:03:16,713
  7088. Good morning,
  7089. Mr. Flarsky.
  7090.  
  7091. 1540
  7092. 01:03:16,715 --> 01:03:18,083
  7093. Jesus!
  7094.  
  7095. 1541
  7096. 01:03:20,151 --> 01:03:21,486
  7097. You scared me, man.
  7098.  
  7099. 1542
  7100. 01:03:27,225 --> 01:03:29,827
  7101. Could you maybe not tell
  7102. anybody about this?
  7103.  
  7104. 1543
  7105. 01:03:29,829 --> 01:03:31,630
  7106. They wouldn't
  7107. believe me anyway.
  7108.  
  7109. 1544
  7110. 01:03:33,265 --> 01:03:34,332
  7111. Fair enough.
  7112.  
  7113. 1545
  7114. 01:03:35,400 --> 01:03:36,736
  7115. Good luck, man.
  7116.  
  7117. 1546
  7118. 01:03:38,704 --> 01:03:39,772
  7119. Thank you.
  7120.  
  7121. 1547
  7122. 01:03:48,781 --> 01:03:51,180
  7123. <i>These helicopters are scary.</i>
  7124.  
  7125. 1548
  7126. 01:03:51,182 --> 01:03:54,319
  7127. <i>It's gonna be fine, Fred.
  7128. Just breathe.</i>
  7129.  
  7130. 1549
  7131. 01:03:57,322 --> 01:03:59,790
  7132. <i>One, two, three, four.</i>
  7133.  
  7134. 1550
  7135. 01:03:59,792 --> 01:04:01,794
  7136. <i>One, two, three, four.</i>
  7137.  
  7138. 1551
  7139. 01:04:13,906 --> 01:04:15,806
  7140. I feel so happy right now!
  7141.  
  7142. 1552
  7143. 01:04:15,808 --> 01:04:17,541
  7144. Like,
  7145. I'm beginning to realize,
  7146.  
  7147. 1553
  7148. 01:04:17,543 --> 01:04:19,275
  7149. I may have never been happy.
  7150.  
  7151. 1554
  7152. 01:04:19,277 --> 01:04:21,779
  7153. This might be the first time
  7154. I ever felt happy.
  7155.  
  7156. 1555
  7157. 01:04:21,781 --> 01:04:23,246
  7158. And it feels good.
  7159.  
  7160. 1556
  7161. 01:04:23,248 --> 01:04:26,249
  7162. This is like, the best shit
  7163. that's ever happened.
  7164.  
  7165. 1557
  7166. 01:04:26,251 --> 01:04:28,184
  7167. There's like this crazy big
  7168. banquet thing tonight,
  7169.  
  7170. 1558
  7171. 01:04:28,186 --> 01:04:29,787
  7172. and she gave me
  7173. like a tuxedo to wear.
  7174.  
  7175. 1559
  7176. 01:04:29,789 --> 01:04:30,854
  7177. And it's not like a date,
  7178.  
  7179. 1560
  7180. 01:04:30,856 --> 01:04:32,456
  7181. but it kinda
  7182. feels like a date.
  7183.  
  7184. 1561
  7185. 01:04:32,458 --> 01:04:35,158
  7186. <i>How do I not fuck this up?
  7187. Seems impossible.</i>
  7188.  
  7189. 1562
  7190. 01:04:35,160 --> 01:04:37,394
  7191. Dude, you just need to give
  7192. yourself affirmation, man.
  7193.  
  7194. 1563
  7195. 01:04:37,396 --> 01:04:39,195
  7196. You need to...
  7197.  
  7198. 1564
  7199. 01:04:39,197 --> 01:04:41,266
  7200. You need to say that
  7201. you're worthy of love, man.
  7202.  
  7203. 1565
  7204. 01:04:42,233 --> 01:04:43,534
  7205. I am worthy of love.
  7206.  
  7207. 1566
  7208. 01:04:43,536 --> 01:04:45,201
  7209. <i>All right, now you gotta
  7210. say it 10,000</i>
  7211.  
  7212. 1567
  7213. 01:04:45,203 --> 01:04:46,704
  7214. more times,
  7215. until you believe it.
  7216.  
  7217. 1568
  7218. 01:04:46,706 --> 01:04:48,171
  7219. <i>Okay, look, I gotta go.</i>
  7220.  
  7221. 1569
  7222. 01:04:48,173 --> 01:04:50,507
  7223. <i>I have no fucking clue
  7224. how to tie a bow tie.</i>
  7225.  
  7226. 1570
  7227. 01:04:50,509 --> 01:04:52,175
  7228. All right, man. Hey!
  7229.  
  7230. 1571
  7231. 01:04:52,177 --> 01:04:53,178
  7232. <i>Be bold!</i>
  7233.  
  7234. 1572
  7235. 01:05:09,595 --> 01:05:10,928
  7236. Hi.
  7237.  
  7238. 1573
  7239. 01:05:10,930 --> 01:05:13,597
  7240. You look really pretty.
  7241.  
  7242. 1574
  7243. 01:05:13,599 --> 01:05:14,834
  7244. Thank you.
  7245.  
  7246. 1575
  7247. 01:05:15,735 --> 01:05:18,802
  7248. You look really pretty, too.
  7249.  
  7250. 1576
  7251. 01:05:18,804 --> 01:05:19,870
  7252. Thank you.
  7253.  
  7254. 1577
  7255. 01:05:19,872 --> 01:05:21,305
  7256. Thanks for the suit.
  7257.  
  7258. 1578
  7259. 01:05:21,307 --> 01:05:22,439
  7260. We should probably head in.
  7261.  
  7262. 1579
  7263. 01:05:22,441 --> 01:05:23,542
  7264. - Shall we?
  7265. - Yeah.
  7266.  
  7267. 1580
  7268. 01:05:26,979 --> 01:05:29,747
  7269. Wow. This is awesome.
  7270.  
  7271. 1581
  7272. 01:05:29,749 --> 01:05:31,415
  7273. It's cool being
  7274. in Argentina.
  7275.  
  7276. 1582
  7277. 01:05:31,417 --> 01:05:32,816
  7278. I think the guys
  7279. who killed my grandparents
  7280.  
  7281. 1583
  7282. 01:05:32,818 --> 01:05:34,620
  7283. are hiding here somewhere.
  7284.  
  7285. 1584
  7286. 01:05:35,354 --> 01:05:36,455
  7287. Shit, they got a band.
  7288.  
  7289. 1585
  7290. 01:05:38,457 --> 01:05:41,892
  7291. Do you wanna, uh, dance maybe?
  7292. Or grab a drink?
  7293.  
  7294. 1586
  7295. 01:05:41,894 --> 01:05:43,427
  7296. So there are representatives
  7297.  
  7298. 1587
  7299. 01:05:43,429 --> 01:05:45,295
  7300. from over 75 countries
  7301. here tonight.
  7302.  
  7303. 1588
  7304. 01:05:45,297 --> 01:05:46,830
  7305. She has three hours
  7306. to get out there,
  7307.  
  7308. 1589
  7309. 01:05:46,832 --> 01:05:47,865
  7310. - shake her money maker...
  7311. - Yeah.
  7312.  
  7313. 1590
  7314. 01:05:47,867 --> 01:05:49,600
  7315. ...and get as many
  7316. commitments as possible.
  7317.  
  7318. 1591
  7319. 01:05:49,602 --> 01:05:51,268
  7320. - This is a work event.
  7321. - Of course, yeah. I get it.
  7322.  
  7323. 1592
  7324. 01:05:51,270 --> 01:05:54,538
  7325. We could, uh, maybe at the end
  7326. of the night, have a drink.
  7327.  
  7328. 1593
  7329. 01:05:54,540 --> 01:05:56,674
  7330. Yeah, if you have time.
  7331. Cool.
  7332.  
  7333. 1594
  7334. 01:05:56,676 --> 01:05:58,742
  7335. - We'll see.
  7336. - Yeah.
  7337.  
  7338. 1595
  7339. 01:05:58,744 --> 01:06:00,546
  7340. All right. Okay.
  7341.  
  7342. 1596
  7343. 01:06:04,550 --> 01:06:05,885
  7344. I know what's going on.
  7345.  
  7346. 1597
  7347. 01:06:09,255 --> 01:06:11,689
  7348. - What do you mean?
  7349. - You know what I mean.
  7350.  
  7351. 1598
  7352. 01:06:11,691 --> 01:06:12,756
  7353. There's nothing going on.
  7354.  
  7355. 1599
  7356. 01:06:12,758 --> 01:06:14,926
  7357. Don't fucking bullshit me,
  7358. Fred.
  7359.  
  7360. 1600
  7361. 01:06:14,928 --> 01:06:17,628
  7362. 'Cause my EQ is through
  7363. the goddamn roof.
  7364.  
  7365. 1601
  7366. 01:06:17,630 --> 01:06:20,698
  7367. And I understand and intuit
  7368. the nuances of social dynamics
  7369.  
  7370. 1602
  7371. 01:06:20,700 --> 01:06:21,665
  7372. like you wouldn't believe.
  7373.  
  7374. 1603
  7375. 01:06:21,667 --> 01:06:24,601
  7376. The two of you are having sex
  7377. with each other.
  7378.  
  7379. 1604
  7380. 01:06:24,603 --> 01:06:26,437
  7381. There's no way you could
  7382. discern something like that.
  7383.  
  7384. 1605
  7385. 01:06:26,439 --> 01:06:27,673
  7386. Charlotte told me.
  7387.  
  7388. 1606
  7389. 01:06:28,441 --> 01:06:29,373
  7390. Really?
  7391.  
  7392. 1607
  7393. 01:06:29,375 --> 01:06:31,442
  7394. No, but you just did,
  7395. you fucking idiot.
  7396.  
  7397. 1608
  7398. 01:06:31,444 --> 01:06:34,445
  7399. Fuck! Shit!
  7400. That was fucking very clever.
  7401.  
  7402. 1609
  7403. 01:06:34,447 --> 01:06:35,612
  7404. Jesus, well,
  7405. you know what, yes.
  7406.  
  7407. 1610
  7408. 01:06:35,614 --> 01:06:37,648
  7409. Okay. We're sexing
  7410. one another down.
  7411.  
  7412. 1611
  7413. 01:06:37,650 --> 01:06:38,549
  7414. - So?
  7415. - Ew.
  7416.  
  7417. 1612
  7418. 01:06:38,551 --> 01:06:39,918
  7419. Honestly, it's probably
  7420. weirder to me
  7421.  
  7422. 1613
  7423. 01:06:39,920 --> 01:06:41,052
  7424. - than it is to you.
  7425. - Look,
  7426.  
  7427. 1614
  7428. 01:06:41,054 --> 01:06:42,219
  7429. I can't believe
  7430. I have to say this,
  7431.  
  7432. 1615
  7433. 01:06:42,221 --> 01:06:45,458
  7434. but just so you know, there's
  7435. no way the two of you work.
  7436.  
  7437. 1616
  7438. 01:06:46,659 --> 01:06:48,392
  7439. Why would you say that?
  7440. You don't know that.
  7441.  
  7442. 1617
  7443. 01:06:48,394 --> 01:06:50,461
  7444. The public will never accept
  7445. the two of you together,
  7446.  
  7447. 1618
  7448. 01:06:50,463 --> 01:06:51,830
  7449. so neither will she.
  7450.  
  7451. 1619
  7452. 01:06:51,832 --> 01:06:53,430
  7453. Honestly, Fred,
  7454. it doesn't matter
  7455.  
  7456. 1620
  7457. 01:06:53,432 --> 01:06:54,398
  7458. if you get it or you don't,
  7459.  
  7460. 1621
  7461. 01:06:54,400 --> 01:06:56,067
  7462. 'cause the truth is,
  7463. she is going to realize it
  7464.  
  7465. 1622
  7466. 01:06:56,069 --> 01:06:57,334
  7467. for the both of you,
  7468.  
  7469. 1623
  7470. 01:06:57,336 --> 01:06:59,436
  7471. then you'll have
  7472. your heart broken.
  7473.  
  7474. 1624
  7475. 01:06:59,438 --> 01:07:00,772
  7476. And that could be
  7477. kinda fun to watch.
  7478.  
  7479. 1625
  7480. 01:07:00,774 --> 01:07:02,475
  7481. Ambassador Plenipotentiary...
  7482.  
  7483. 1626
  7484. 01:07:19,626 --> 01:07:20,861
  7485. Madam Secretary!
  7486.  
  7487. 1627
  7488. 01:07:21,962 --> 01:07:23,494
  7489. Excuse me.
  7490.  
  7491. 1628
  7492. 01:07:23,496 --> 01:07:24,629
  7493. - Ah!
  7494. - Parker.
  7495.  
  7496. 1629
  7497. 01:07:24,631 --> 01:07:26,698
  7498. Nope. Nope. Uh...
  7499.  
  7500. 1630
  7501. 01:07:28,568 --> 01:07:31,936
  7502. You know, we still have not
  7503. found time to sit down.
  7504.  
  7505. 1631
  7506. 01:07:31,938 --> 01:07:33,104
  7507. You know,
  7508. it's not gonna happen.
  7509.  
  7510. 1632
  7511. 01:07:33,106 --> 01:07:34,739
  7512. I'm not gonna find time.
  7513.  
  7514. 1633
  7515. 01:07:34,741 --> 01:07:37,341
  7516. I will get my way on this.
  7517.  
  7518. 1634
  7519. 01:07:37,343 --> 01:07:38,676
  7520. I don't even know
  7521. what you mean by "this,"
  7522.  
  7523. 1635
  7524. 01:07:38,678 --> 01:07:41,112
  7525. but please have at it.
  7526. It's all yours.
  7527.  
  7528. 1636
  7529. 01:07:41,114 --> 01:07:42,547
  7530. - May I have a word?
  7531. - Can you excuse me?
  7532.  
  7533. 1637
  7534. 01:07:42,549 --> 01:07:43,782
  7535. We're in the middle
  7536. of a conversation here.
  7537.  
  7538. 1638
  7539. 01:07:43,784 --> 01:07:46,451
  7540. - Of course. Yes.
  7541. - Oh, my God. You are a...
  7542.  
  7543. 1639
  7544. 01:07:46,453 --> 01:07:48,953
  7545. You look
  7546. absolutely wonderful.
  7547.  
  7548. 1640
  7549. 01:07:48,955 --> 01:07:50,855
  7550. Oh.
  7551.  
  7552. 1641
  7553. 01:07:52,092 --> 01:07:53,591
  7554. I have to say,
  7555. I have been
  7556.  
  7557. 1642
  7558. 01:07:53,593 --> 01:07:55,827
  7559. so impressed
  7560. by your initiative.
  7561.  
  7562. 1643
  7563. 01:07:55,829 --> 01:07:57,595
  7564. Does this mean
  7565. I can add Canada
  7566.  
  7567. 1644
  7568. 01:07:57,597 --> 01:07:59,597
  7569. to the list of countries
  7570. taking part?
  7571.  
  7572. 1645
  7573. 01:07:59,599 --> 01:08:01,766
  7574. On one condition.
  7575.  
  7576. 1646
  7577. 01:08:01,768 --> 01:08:02,667
  7578. Let me guess.
  7579.  
  7580. 1647
  7581. 01:08:02,669 --> 01:08:05,403
  7582. You want fewer restrictions
  7583. on lumber.
  7584.  
  7585. 1648
  7586. 01:08:05,405 --> 01:08:06,740
  7587. I don't care about lumber.
  7588.  
  7589. 1649
  7590. 01:08:08,041 --> 01:08:09,576
  7591. I just want to dance.
  7592.  
  7593. 1650
  7594. 01:08:13,013 --> 01:08:14,078
  7595. Sure.
  7596.  
  7597. 1651
  7598. 01:08:37,737 --> 01:08:38,805
  7599. Whoa!
  7600.  
  7601. 1652
  7602. 01:08:40,006 --> 01:08:41,508
  7603. Wow.
  7604.  
  7605. 1653
  7606. 01:08:42,876 --> 01:08:44,108
  7607. You know
  7608. when you see something,
  7609.  
  7610. 1654
  7611. 01:08:44,110 --> 01:08:47,445
  7612. and it just looks right.
  7613.  
  7614. 1655
  7615. 01:08:47,447 --> 01:08:49,514
  7616. Like a Kangol hat
  7617. on Samuel L. Jackson.
  7618.  
  7619. 1656
  7620. 01:08:49,516 --> 01:08:50,517
  7621. Mmm-hmm.
  7622.  
  7623. 1657
  7624. 01:09:00,161 --> 01:09:01,862
  7625. I'm worthy of love.
  7626.  
  7627. 1658
  7628. 01:09:03,563 --> 01:09:04,898
  7629. I'm worthy of love.
  7630.  
  7631. 1659
  7632. 01:09:07,534 --> 01:09:08,835
  7633. What the fuck
  7634. are you saying?
  7635.  
  7636. 1660
  7637. 01:09:09,736 --> 01:09:10,737
  7638. Nothing.
  7639.  
  7640. 1661
  7641. 01:09:43,938 --> 01:09:44,939
  7642. <i>Bonjour,</i> ma'am.
  7643.  
  7644. 1662
  7645. 01:10:17,972 --> 01:10:18,973
  7646. Excuse me.
  7647.  
  7648. 1663
  7649. 01:10:21,042 --> 01:10:22,575
  7650. Agent E, look alive.
  7651.  
  7652. 1664
  7653. 01:10:38,159 --> 01:10:39,526
  7654. - Hi.
  7655. - Hey.
  7656.  
  7657. 1665
  7658. 01:10:40,294 --> 01:10:41,929
  7659. I hear you have
  7660. a crush on me.
  7661.  
  7662. 1666
  7663. 01:10:43,297 --> 01:10:44,665
  7664. I do.
  7665.  
  7666. 1667
  7667. 01:10:46,233 --> 01:10:48,035
  7668. Kinda have
  7669. a crush on you, too.
  7670.  
  7671. 1668
  7672. 01:10:49,737 --> 01:10:50,905
  7673. Well, that's cool.
  7674.  
  7675. 1669
  7676. 01:10:54,175 --> 01:10:56,275
  7677. Hey, I know I asked earlier.
  7678.  
  7679. 1670
  7680. 01:10:56,277 --> 01:10:57,843
  7681. But, uh...
  7682.  
  7683. 1671
  7684. 01:11:01,549 --> 01:11:02,883
  7685. Do you want to dance with me?
  7686.  
  7687. 1672
  7688. 01:11:05,720 --> 01:11:06,721
  7689. It's a dope song.
  7690.  
  7691. 1673
  7692. 01:11:07,888 --> 01:11:09,121
  7693. Really fucking good song.
  7694.  
  7695. 1674
  7696. 01:11:09,123 --> 01:11:10,255
  7697. Maybe the best song
  7698. ever written.
  7699.  
  7700. 1675
  7701. 01:11:10,257 --> 01:11:11,258
  7702. Yeah.
  7703.  
  7704. 1676
  7705. 01:12:59,401 --> 01:13:01,034
  7706. I want you to
  7707. fuck me from behind
  7708.  
  7709. 1677
  7710. 01:13:01,036 --> 01:13:02,204
  7711. and slap my ass really hard.
  7712.  
  7713. 1678
  7714. 01:13:04,873 --> 01:13:06,072
  7715. What?
  7716.  
  7717. 1679
  7718. 01:13:06,074 --> 01:13:07,407
  7719. What?
  7720.  
  7721. 1680
  7722. 01:13:07,409 --> 01:13:09,675
  7723. Nothing. What,
  7724. did I say "what"?
  7725.  
  7726. 1681
  7727. 01:13:09,677 --> 01:13:10,977
  7728. Am I being too bossy?
  7729.  
  7730. 1682
  7731. 01:13:10,979 --> 01:13:13,745
  7732. No. No. No. No. Not at all.
  7733. No. No.
  7734.  
  7735. 1683
  7736. 01:13:13,747 --> 01:13:15,281
  7737. I am. I am.
  7738. I'm your boss all day,
  7739.  
  7740. 1684
  7741. 01:13:15,283 --> 01:13:16,149
  7742. and now I'm bossing you
  7743. in bed.
  7744.  
  7745. 1685
  7746. 01:13:16,151 --> 01:13:17,683
  7747. I'm sorry.
  7748. I didn't mean it that way.
  7749.  
  7750. 1686
  7751. 01:13:17,685 --> 01:13:18,885
  7752. No. Not at all.
  7753.  
  7754. 1687
  7755. 01:13:18,887 --> 01:13:20,753
  7756. My brain, honestly, just went
  7757. into shock a little bit...
  7758.  
  7759. 1688
  7760. 01:13:20,755 --> 01:13:21,888
  7761. Yeah, but you hesitated.
  7762.  
  7763. 1689
  7764. 01:13:21,890 --> 01:13:24,924
  7765. No, it's just not how
  7766. I imagined you liking things.
  7767.  
  7768. 1690
  7769. 01:13:24,926 --> 01:13:28,027
  7770. You know what? We'll do exactly
  7771. what you were imagining.
  7772.  
  7773. 1691
  7774. 01:13:28,029 --> 01:13:30,029
  7775. And then you turn me around
  7776. and slap me on my ass
  7777.  
  7778. 1692
  7779. 01:13:30,031 --> 01:13:31,266
  7780. and then choke me
  7781. a little bit.
  7782.  
  7783. 1693
  7784. 01:13:32,033 --> 01:13:33,034
  7785. Oh, my God.
  7786.  
  7787. 1694
  7788. 01:13:40,775 --> 01:13:41,843
  7789. Whoa.
  7790.  
  7791. 1695
  7792. 01:13:51,853 --> 01:13:52,854
  7793. Frederick.
  7794.  
  7795. 1696
  7796. 01:13:53,455 --> 01:13:54,689
  7797. Margaret.
  7798.  
  7799. 1697
  7800. 01:13:59,461 --> 01:14:01,261
  7801. Hey, you forgot this...
  7802. Oh, fuck!
  7803.  
  7804. 1698
  7805. 01:14:01,263 --> 01:14:03,029
  7806. - Gross!
  7807. - Um...
  7808.  
  7809. 1699
  7810. 01:14:03,031 --> 01:14:04,364
  7811. I thought you guys
  7812. hated each other.
  7813.  
  7814. 1700
  7815. 01:14:04,366 --> 01:14:06,466
  7816. - We do hate each other.
  7817. - We do. Big time.
  7818.  
  7819. 1701
  7820. 01:14:06,468 --> 01:14:08,401
  7821. - We are also fucking.
  7822. - Ugh.
  7823.  
  7824. 1702
  7825. 01:14:08,403 --> 01:14:09,503
  7826. How long
  7827. have you been fucking?
  7828.  
  7829. 1703
  7830. 01:14:09,505 --> 01:14:10,837
  7831. That was probably 20 minutes.
  7832.  
  7833. 1704
  7834. 01:14:10,839 --> 01:14:11,905
  7835. Not right now!
  7836.  
  7837. 1705
  7838. 01:14:11,907 --> 01:14:14,107
  7839. - Oh.
  7840. - A lot of questions. Um, I...
  7841.  
  7842. 1706
  7843. 01:14:14,109 --> 01:14:15,275
  7844. I would say
  7845. anywhere between
  7846.  
  7847. 1707
  7848. 01:14:15,277 --> 01:14:17,143
  7849. two and five...
  7850. Three and a half times.
  7851.  
  7852. 1708
  7853. 01:14:17,145 --> 01:14:18,978
  7854. I would say on my end, five.
  7855.  
  7856. 1709
  7857. 01:14:18,980 --> 01:14:20,447
  7858. Three and a half sounds right.
  7859.  
  7860. 1710
  7861. 01:14:20,449 --> 01:14:22,815
  7862. I don't know how you're tallying that shit.
  7863. That's sick.
  7864.  
  7865. 1711
  7866. 01:14:22,817 --> 01:14:25,251
  7867. Okay, first of all,
  7868. there's a woman present.
  7869.  
  7870. 1712
  7871. 01:14:25,253 --> 01:14:26,886
  7872. There's a woman
  7873. in there, too?
  7874.  
  7875. 1713
  7876. 01:14:26,888 --> 01:14:28,788
  7877. - Excuse me.
  7878. - Easy.
  7879.  
  7880. 1714
  7881. 01:14:28,790 --> 01:14:29,989
  7882. - And I got it.
  7883. - Sorry.
  7884.  
  7885. 1715
  7886. 01:14:29,991 --> 01:14:31,357
  7887. - Again.
  7888. - Sorry, I'm...
  7889.  
  7890. 1716
  7891. 01:14:31,359 --> 01:14:33,226
  7892. A woman is present
  7893. and that woman is me.
  7894.  
  7895. 1717
  7896. 01:14:33,228 --> 01:14:34,827
  7897. - You?
  7898. - We're talking about her.
  7899.  
  7900. 1718
  7901. 01:14:34,829 --> 01:14:36,763
  7902. Trust me, I know, Fred.
  7903.  
  7904. 1719
  7905. 01:14:36,765 --> 01:14:37,830
  7906. Tom, I got this.
  7907.  
  7908. 1720
  7909. 01:14:37,832 --> 01:14:39,265
  7910. - Ugh!
  7911. - I'm gonna say goodnight.
  7912.  
  7913. 1721
  7914. 01:14:39,267 --> 01:14:40,467
  7915. You tuck that in.
  7916. Goodnight to you.
  7917.  
  7918. 1722
  7919. 01:14:40,469 --> 01:14:41,334
  7920. And I will take my leave.
  7921.  
  7922. 1723
  7923. 01:14:41,336 --> 01:14:44,371
  7924. No. No way.
  7925. I'm not touching that shit.
  7926.  
  7927. 1724
  7928. 01:14:44,373 --> 01:14:46,839
  7929. - It's not the worst instinct.
  7930. - Guys, just...
  7931.  
  7932. 1725
  7933. 01:14:46,841 --> 01:14:47,907
  7934. Those hands
  7935. have been places.
  7936.  
  7937. 1726
  7938. 01:14:47,909 --> 01:14:49,410
  7939. Goodnight.
  7940.  
  7941. 1727
  7942. 01:14:49,412 --> 01:14:51,911
  7943. <i>With France's commitment,
  7944. U.S. Secretary of State</i>
  7945.  
  7946. 1728
  7947. 01:14:51,913 --> 01:14:55,282
  7948. <i>Charlotte Field's noble
  7949. Rehabilitation Initiative</i>
  7950.  
  7951. 1729
  7952. 01:14:55,284 --> 01:14:57,318
  7953. <i>has secured the support
  7954. of 100 countries.</i>
  7955.  
  7956. 1730
  7957. 01:14:59,422 --> 01:15:00,688
  7958. The president
  7959. wants to talk to you.
  7960.  
  7961. 1731
  7962. 01:15:00,690 --> 01:15:03,823
  7963. We've set up the tent in the next
  7964. room, Madam Secretary.
  7965.  
  7966. 1732
  7967. 01:15:03,825 --> 01:15:05,093
  7968. Tell him hi.
  7969.  
  7970. 1733
  7971. 01:15:09,532 --> 01:15:12,165
  7972. Mr. President. <i>Bonjour.</i>
  7973.  
  7974. 1734
  7975. 01:15:12,167 --> 01:15:13,434
  7976. <i>Charlie,</i> bonjour.
  7977.  
  7978. 1735
  7979. 01:15:13,436 --> 01:15:17,003
  7980. <i>Hey, what's this I hear about
  7981. an environmental treaty thing?</i>
  7982.  
  7983. 1736
  7984. 01:15:17,005 --> 01:15:18,805
  7985. Oh, it's the Global
  7986.  
  7987. 1737
  7988. 01:15:18,807 --> 01:15:20,907
  7989. Rehabilitation Initiative,
  7990. sir.
  7991.  
  7992. 1738
  7993. 01:15:20,909 --> 01:15:23,410
  7994. It's been on your desk for the
  7995. last three weeks.
  7996.  
  7997. 1739
  7998. 01:15:23,412 --> 01:15:25,512
  7999. Yeah, well,
  8000. we ran it up the flagpole
  8001.  
  8002. 1740
  8003. 01:15:25,514 --> 01:15:27,947
  8004. and it's ruffling
  8005. some feathers.
  8006.  
  8007. 1741
  8008. 01:15:27,949 --> 01:15:30,083
  8009. Sir, you are the flagpole.
  8010.  
  8011. 1742
  8012. 01:15:30,085 --> 01:15:33,520
  8013. There are actually quite a few
  8014. flagpoles in this joint.
  8015.  
  8016. 1743
  8017. 01:15:33,522 --> 01:15:35,289
  8018. <i>We need you to revise it.</i>
  8019.  
  8020. 1744
  8021. 01:15:35,291 --> 01:15:36,292
  8022. Sir?
  8023.  
  8024. 1745
  8025. 01:15:37,193 --> 01:15:39,295
  8026. <i>We need you to kill the trees.</i>
  8027.  
  8028. 1746
  8029. 01:15:43,299 --> 01:15:44,531
  8030. Why would he do that?
  8031.  
  8032. 1747
  8033. 01:15:44,533 --> 01:15:47,568
  8034. Because he's funded by a
  8035. bunch of fucking rich assholes
  8036.  
  8037. 1748
  8038. 01:15:47,570 --> 01:15:49,203
  8039. and I probably pissed
  8040. one of them off.
  8041.  
  8042. 1749
  8043. 01:15:49,205 --> 01:15:50,903
  8044. Can I just say
  8045. the optics of this
  8046.  
  8047. 1750
  8048. 01:15:50,905 --> 01:15:52,606
  8049. are actually
  8050. not that different?
  8051.  
  8052. 1751
  8053. 01:15:52,608 --> 01:15:54,408
  8054. The initiative still has
  8055. the same name.
  8056.  
  8057. 1752
  8058. 01:15:54,410 --> 01:15:56,176
  8059. It sounds
  8060. very impressive,
  8061.  
  8062. 1753
  8063. 01:15:56,178 --> 01:15:58,312
  8064. which is ultimately
  8065. all that matters.
  8066.  
  8067. 1754
  8068. 01:15:58,314 --> 01:16:01,015
  8069. I actually cared about this.
  8070.  
  8071. 1755
  8072. 01:16:01,017 --> 01:16:02,583
  8073. Now what am I
  8074. fucking left with? Bees?
  8075.  
  8076. 1756
  8077. 01:16:02,585 --> 01:16:03,916
  8078. I don't even like bees.
  8079.  
  8080. 1757
  8081. 01:16:03,918 --> 01:16:05,185
  8082. Do you have to
  8083. listen to him?
  8084.  
  8085. 1758
  8086. 01:16:05,187 --> 01:16:08,355
  8087. Yes. I have to listen to him.
  8088.  
  8089. 1759
  8090. 01:16:08,357 --> 01:16:11,191
  8091. Because unless he endorses me,
  8092. I won't win.
  8093.  
  8094. 1760
  8095. 01:16:11,193 --> 01:16:14,128
  8096. And this whole fucking show
  8097. would have been for nothing.
  8098.  
  8099. 1761
  8100. 01:16:14,130 --> 01:16:16,196
  8101. Well, maybe you don't need
  8102. his endorsement to win.
  8103.  
  8104. 1762
  8105. 01:16:16,198 --> 01:16:17,564
  8106. You know?
  8107. People are digging your shit.
  8108.  
  8109. 1763
  8110. 01:16:17,566 --> 01:16:19,233
  8111. And your numbers are good.
  8112.  
  8113. 1764
  8114. 01:16:19,235 --> 01:16:21,435
  8115. You know what, Fred?
  8116. She needs a little alone time.
  8117.  
  8118. 1765
  8119. 01:16:21,437 --> 01:16:22,970
  8120. Right, she probably just needs
  8121. a friend right now.
  8122.  
  8123. 1766
  8124. 01:16:22,972 --> 01:16:24,038
  8125. Time to go, buddy.
  8126.  
  8127. 1767
  8128. 01:16:24,040 --> 01:16:25,906
  8129. Oh, my God.
  8130.  
  8131. 1768
  8132. 01:16:25,908 --> 01:16:29,145
  8133. Maggie, just give me a second
  8134. alone with Fred, please.
  8135.  
  8136. 1769
  8137. 01:16:43,993 --> 01:16:46,393
  8138. I don't wanna
  8139. do this job anymore.
  8140.  
  8141. 1770
  8142. 01:16:46,395 --> 01:16:47,463
  8143. I fuckin' hate it.
  8144.  
  8145. 1771
  8146. 01:16:48,364 --> 01:16:50,531
  8147. I mean, what's the point?
  8148.  
  8149. 1772
  8150. 01:16:50,533 --> 01:16:53,836
  8151. Every time I do something,
  8152. it just gets undone.
  8153.  
  8154. 1773
  8155. 01:16:54,403 --> 01:16:55,636
  8156. I'm sorry.
  8157.  
  8158. 1774
  8159. 01:16:55,638 --> 01:16:57,438
  8160. I just wanna be
  8161. a normal person
  8162.  
  8163. 1775
  8164. 01:16:57,440 --> 01:16:59,206
  8165. and not give a fuck
  8166. about anything
  8167.  
  8168. 1776
  8169. 01:16:59,208 --> 01:17:01,241
  8170. just like
  8171. the rest of the world.
  8172.  
  8173. 1777
  8174. 01:17:01,243 --> 01:17:03,310
  8175. Yeah, most people don't
  8176. give a shit about anything.
  8177.  
  8178. 1778
  8179. 01:17:03,312 --> 01:17:05,014
  8180. I bet it's really nice.
  8181.  
  8182. 1779
  8183. 01:17:06,182 --> 01:17:08,015
  8184. That's what I want.
  8185.  
  8186. 1780
  8187. 01:17:08,017 --> 01:17:10,119
  8188. I don't know
  8189. how to give that to you.
  8190.  
  8191. 1781
  8192. 01:17:13,556 --> 01:17:15,124
  8193. Let's get fucked up.
  8194.  
  8195. 1782
  8196. 01:17:15,524 --> 01:17:16,591
  8197. Fucked up?
  8198.  
  8199. 1783
  8200. 01:17:16,593 --> 01:17:19,059
  8201. - Yeah.
  8202. - Like a few beers fucked up
  8203.  
  8204. 1784
  8205. 01:17:19,061 --> 01:17:21,328
  8206. or more than that fucked up?
  8207.  
  8208. 1785
  8209. 01:17:21,330 --> 01:17:23,299
  8210. Like super fucked up.
  8211.  
  8212. 1786
  8213. 01:17:29,138 --> 01:17:31,606
  8214. I want to smoke
  8215. a Molly with you.
  8216.  
  8217. 1787
  8218. 01:17:33,042 --> 01:17:34,210
  8219. What?
  8220.  
  8221. 1788
  8222. 01:17:34,977 --> 01:17:36,711
  8223. That's not, um...
  8224.  
  8225. 1789
  8226. 01:17:36,713 --> 01:17:38,379
  8227. That's not
  8228. how you take it, but...
  8229.  
  8230. 1790
  8231. 01:17:38,381 --> 01:17:39,279
  8232. How do you take it?
  8233.  
  8234. 1791
  8235. 01:17:39,281 --> 01:17:41,148
  8236. It's a pill.
  8237. You take it in your mouth.
  8238.  
  8239. 1792
  8240. 01:17:41,150 --> 01:17:42,684
  8241. But I don't know
  8242. if you wanna do it.
  8243.  
  8244. 1793
  8245. 01:17:42,686 --> 01:17:44,017
  8246. Why not?
  8247.  
  8248. 1794
  8249. 01:17:44,019 --> 01:17:45,953
  8250. I just don't know
  8251. if it's a good idea.
  8252.  
  8253. 1795
  8254. 01:17:45,955 --> 01:17:49,325
  8255. As your boss, I'm ordering you
  8256. to get me a Molly.
  8257.  
  8258. 1796
  8259. 01:17:50,259 --> 01:17:51,428
  8260. Oh, man.
  8261.  
  8262. 1797
  8263. 01:18:21,458 --> 01:18:22,624
  8264. You good?
  8265.  
  8266. 1798
  8267. 01:18:22,626 --> 01:18:24,592
  8268. I don't feel anything.
  8269.  
  8270. 1799
  8271. 01:18:24,594 --> 01:18:26,594
  8272. You don't feel it?
  8273.  
  8274. 1800
  8275. 01:18:26,596 --> 01:18:28,396
  8276. No, I don't feel
  8277. a fucking thing.
  8278.  
  8279. 1801
  8280. 01:18:28,398 --> 01:18:31,201
  8281. Ooh! Wow.
  8282.  
  8283. 1802
  8284. 01:18:31,668 --> 01:18:34,202
  8285. ...Was right.
  8286.  
  8287. 1803
  8288. 01:18:34,204 --> 01:18:38,105
  8289. Holy fuck...
  8290.  
  8291. 1804
  8292. 01:18:38,107 --> 01:18:39,441
  8293. No!
  8294.  
  8295. 1805
  8296. 01:18:39,443 --> 01:18:41,776
  8297. My jaw feels
  8298. really weird.
  8299.  
  8300. 1806
  8301. 01:18:41,778 --> 01:18:43,110
  8302. Yeah, that's the drugs.
  8303.  
  8304. 1807
  8305. 01:18:43,112 --> 01:18:44,712
  8306. Drugs love a jaw.
  8307.  
  8308. 1808
  8309. 01:18:44,714 --> 01:18:47,148
  8310. - I want more.
  8311. - No, no, no, no.
  8312.  
  8313. 1809
  8314. 01:18:47,150 --> 01:18:48,550
  8315. Maybe in like an hour.
  8316.  
  8317. 1810
  8318. 01:18:48,552 --> 01:18:50,253
  8319. We should do it now.
  8320.  
  8321. 1811
  8322. 01:19:19,115 --> 01:19:21,316
  8323. Yes, motherfuckers!
  8324.  
  8325. 1812
  8326. 01:19:21,318 --> 01:19:23,251
  8327. I could do this forever!
  8328.  
  8329. 1813
  8330. 01:19:23,253 --> 01:19:24,652
  8331. We're gonna.
  8332.  
  8333. 1814
  8334. 01:19:24,654 --> 01:19:27,155
  8335. I know I've been like...
  8336.  
  8337. 1815
  8338. 01:19:27,157 --> 01:19:29,390
  8339. I've been, like, playing it
  8340. pretty cool.
  8341.  
  8342. 1816
  8343. 01:19:29,392 --> 01:19:31,392
  8344. Like I've probably been
  8345. a little hard to read,
  8346.  
  8347. 1817
  8348. 01:19:31,394 --> 01:19:33,061
  8349. and I've been acting
  8350. kinda, like, aloof,
  8351.  
  8352. 1818
  8353. 01:19:33,063 --> 01:19:34,729
  8354. maybe like I don't
  8355. care that much.
  8356.  
  8357. 1819
  8358. 01:19:34,731 --> 01:19:38,166
  8359. But I don't wanna do that
  8360. anymore. I really like you.
  8361.  
  8362. 1820
  8363. 01:19:38,168 --> 01:19:40,468
  8364. You haven't been
  8365. playing it cool at all.
  8366.  
  8367. 1821
  8368. 01:19:40,470 --> 01:19:43,137
  8369. You just followed me
  8370. into the bathroom.
  8371.  
  8372. 1822
  8373. 01:19:43,139 --> 01:19:44,372
  8374. Yeah, to talk.
  8375.  
  8376. 1823
  8377. 01:19:44,374 --> 01:19:46,508
  8378. - I really like you, too!
  8379. - Really?
  8380.  
  8381. 1824
  8382. 01:19:46,510 --> 01:19:48,142
  8383. - Yeah!
  8384. - Yeah!
  8385.  
  8386. 1825
  8387. 01:19:50,113 --> 01:19:52,780
  8388. - Madam Secretary!
  8389. - Yeah! Whoa!
  8390.  
  8391. 1826
  8392. 01:19:52,782 --> 01:19:54,616
  8393. Madam Secretary!
  8394. Listen to me!
  8395.  
  8396. 1827
  8397. 01:19:54,618 --> 01:19:56,751
  8398. Dance with me,
  8399. Steven! Dance!
  8400.  
  8401. 1828
  8402. 01:19:56,753 --> 01:19:57,853
  8403. We have a situation.
  8404.  
  8405. 1829
  8406. 01:19:57,855 --> 01:19:59,222
  8407. Huh?
  8408.  
  8409. 1830
  8410. 01:20:07,564 --> 01:20:09,430
  8411. Yo.
  8412.  
  8413. 1831
  8414. 01:20:09,432 --> 01:20:12,467
  8415. How much longer is this
  8416. Molly stuff gonna last?
  8417.  
  8418. 1832
  8419. 01:20:12,469 --> 01:20:14,235
  8420. We just re-upped.
  8421.  
  8422. 1833
  8423. 01:20:14,237 --> 01:20:16,437
  8424. You kept saying you wanted
  8425. to take more, so we did.
  8426.  
  8427. 1834
  8428. 01:20:16,439 --> 01:20:19,509
  8429. So we have another
  8430. maybe four or five hours.
  8431.  
  8432. 1835
  8433. 01:20:20,678 --> 01:20:22,811
  8434. Yeah. Why?
  8435.  
  8436. 1836
  8437. 01:20:22,813 --> 01:20:24,647
  8438. I'm in so much trouble.
  8439.  
  8440. 1837
  8441. 01:20:24,649 --> 01:20:25,714
  8442. What's happening?
  8443.  
  8444. 1838
  8445. 01:20:25,716 --> 01:20:27,315
  8446. I'm gonna be
  8447. in so much trouble.
  8448.  
  8449. 1839
  8450. 01:20:27,317 --> 01:20:29,519
  8451. What's happening?
  8452. Are they outta water?
  8453.  
  8454. 1840
  8455. 01:20:30,387 --> 01:20:31,553
  8456. One of our U2s went down
  8457.  
  8458. 1841
  8459. 01:20:31,555 --> 01:20:34,455
  8460. while performing a standard
  8461. fly-over in Kashtari airspace.
  8462.  
  8463. 1842
  8464. 01:20:34,457 --> 01:20:35,557
  8465. The pilot was able to eject,
  8466.  
  8467. 1843
  8468. 01:20:35,559 --> 01:20:38,561
  8469. but it appears he was taken
  8470. by the Kashtari military.
  8471.  
  8472. 1844
  8473. 01:20:38,563 --> 01:20:40,261
  8474. Thank you, General.
  8475.  
  8476. 1845
  8477. 01:20:40,263 --> 01:20:41,764
  8478. Prime Minister Bharath
  8479. is refusing
  8480.  
  8481. 1846
  8482. 01:20:41,766 --> 01:20:44,265
  8483. to return the pilot
  8484. to United States custody.
  8485.  
  8486. 1847
  8487. 01:20:44,267 --> 01:20:46,234
  8488. He's personally hurt
  8489. by the many insults
  8490.  
  8491. 1848
  8492. 01:20:46,236 --> 01:20:47,736
  8493. hurled at him by POTUS.
  8494.  
  8495. 1849
  8496. 01:20:47,738 --> 01:20:49,638
  8497. Good job. All right.
  8498.  
  8499. 1850
  8500. 01:20:52,409 --> 01:20:53,711
  8501. It's gonna be okay
  8502. in there, right?
  8503.  
  8504. 1851
  8505. 01:20:54,679 --> 01:20:56,112
  8506. That's up to you, ma'am.
  8507.  
  8508. 1852
  8509. 01:20:57,347 --> 01:20:59,750
  8510. Oh, God.
  8511. You got this.
  8512.  
  8513. 1853
  8514. 01:21:16,834 --> 01:21:19,368
  8515. I can hold onto your sunglasses for
  8516. you, if you'd like.
  8517.  
  8518. 1854
  8519. 01:21:19,370 --> 01:21:24,408
  8520. Oh, no. I have alopecia.
  8521. In both eyes.
  8522.  
  8523. 1855
  8524. 01:21:30,781 --> 01:21:32,246
  8525. Hello.
  8526.  
  8527. 1856
  8528. 01:21:32,248 --> 01:21:33,214
  8529. <i>Secretary Field!</i>
  8530.  
  8531. 1857
  8532. 01:21:33,216 --> 01:21:34,316
  8533. Oh, my God!
  8534.  
  8535. 1858
  8536. 01:21:34,318 --> 01:21:37,185
  8537. Hello, Bharath? Hey.
  8538.  
  8539. 1859
  8540. 01:21:37,187 --> 01:21:40,556
  8541. I hear we have
  8542. a situation here?
  8543.  
  8544. 1860
  8545. 01:21:40,558 --> 01:21:43,661
  8546. One that we both
  8547. probably want resolved.
  8548.  
  8549. 1861
  8550. 01:21:45,496 --> 01:21:47,930
  8551. Very quickly...
  8552.  
  8553. 1862
  8554. 01:21:47,932 --> 01:21:50,532
  8555. You're not going to bully me
  8556. this time, Madam Secretary.
  8557.  
  8558. 1863
  8559. 01:21:50,534 --> 01:21:52,234
  8560. Your man will stay here
  8561.  
  8562. 1864
  8563. 01:21:52,236 --> 01:21:55,204
  8564. until your president
  8565. personally apologizes to me.
  8566.  
  8567. 1865
  8568. 01:21:55,206 --> 01:21:56,207
  8569. Over Instagram.
  8570.  
  8571. 1866
  8572. 01:21:57,408 --> 01:22:00,378
  8573. - He won't do that.
  8574. - Yeah, no. Yes...
  8575.  
  8576. 1867
  8577. 01:22:01,479 --> 01:22:03,679
  8578. - Yo.
  8579. - Yes?
  8580.  
  8581. 1868
  8582. 01:22:03,681 --> 01:22:05,247
  8583. Can I level with you?
  8584.  
  8585. 1869
  8586. 01:22:05,249 --> 01:22:06,782
  8587. Can I fill you in
  8588. on something?
  8589.  
  8590. 1870
  8591. 01:22:06,784 --> 01:22:07,816
  8592. Go ahead.
  8593.  
  8594. 1871
  8595. 01:22:07,818 --> 01:22:09,485
  8596. Me and Charlotte,
  8597. we're fucked up right now.
  8598.  
  8599. 1872
  8600. 01:22:09,487 --> 01:22:10,419
  8601. We're on drugs.
  8602.  
  8603. 1873
  8604. 01:22:10,421 --> 01:22:11,954
  8605. First of all, I don't
  8606. wanna talk about that.
  8607.  
  8608. 1874
  8609. 01:22:11,956 --> 01:22:13,656
  8610. Why? We can't talk
  8611. about the drugs.
  8612.  
  8613. 1875
  8614. 01:22:13,658 --> 01:22:14,990
  8615. Do you know
  8616. we're on drugs?
  8617.  
  8618. 1876
  8619. 01:22:14,992 --> 01:22:17,528
  8620. I don't wanna talk
  8621. about that in this room.
  8622.  
  8623. 1877
  8624. 01:22:18,729 --> 01:22:19,897
  8625. What's happening?
  8626.  
  8627. 1878
  8628. 01:22:21,365 --> 01:22:22,431
  8629. We're on drugs
  8630. right now.
  8631.  
  8632. 1879
  8633. 01:22:24,502 --> 01:22:26,268
  8634. That's funny.
  8635. That's a funny joke!
  8636.  
  8637. 1880
  8638. 01:22:26,270 --> 01:22:28,237
  8639. What's a joke?
  8640. We're on fucking drugs...
  8641.  
  8642. 1881
  8643. 01:22:29,473 --> 01:22:30,606
  8644. Are we going somewhere?
  8645.  
  8646. 1882
  8647. 01:22:32,443 --> 01:22:34,343
  8648. What is that?
  8649.  
  8650. 1883
  8651. 01:22:34,345 --> 01:22:36,612
  8652. What is happening?
  8653. We're on drugs right now.
  8654.  
  8655. 1884
  8656. 01:22:36,614 --> 01:22:39,314
  8657. So you're admitting that
  8658. the United States government
  8659.  
  8660. 1885
  8661. 01:22:39,316 --> 01:22:41,550
  8662. ordered these planes
  8663. to spy on my country?
  8664.  
  8665. 1886
  8666. 01:22:41,552 --> 01:22:42,618
  8667. No.
  8668.  
  8669. 1887
  8670. 01:22:43,788 --> 01:22:46,889
  8671. No! No! Of course not!
  8672.  
  8673. 1888
  8674. 01:22:46,891 --> 01:22:48,992
  8675. <i>That's what it sounded like.
  8676. Face it.</i>
  8677.  
  8678. 1889
  8679. 01:22:48,994 --> 01:22:50,225
  8680. You have no leverage here.
  8681.  
  8682. 1890
  8683. 01:22:50,227 --> 01:22:53,495
  8684. Match his aggression, Madam.
  8685. It's the only way out of this.
  8686.  
  8687. 1891
  8688. 01:22:53,497 --> 01:22:55,965
  8689. I don't know, he seems
  8690. really fucking pissed off.
  8691.  
  8692. 1892
  8693. 01:22:55,967 --> 01:22:57,466
  8694. Get more fucking pissed.
  8695.  
  8696. 1893
  8697. 01:22:57,468 --> 01:22:58,870
  8698. Let him know
  8699. who's really in charge.
  8700.  
  8701. 1894
  8702. 01:23:03,774 --> 01:23:05,476
  8703. Oh, my God,
  8704. that really hurt.
  8705.  
  8706. 1895
  8707. 01:23:06,711 --> 01:23:08,477
  8708. I gotta be honest,
  8709. I'm not...
  8710.  
  8711. 1896
  8712. 01:23:08,479 --> 01:23:11,680
  8713. I'm not feeling
  8714. all this aggression stuff.
  8715.  
  8716. 1897
  8717. 01:23:11,682 --> 01:23:15,350
  8718. I'm into more of,
  8719. like, a chilled vibe.
  8720.  
  8721. 1898
  8722. 01:23:15,352 --> 01:23:17,989
  8723. You know, just feeling...
  8724.  
  8725. 1899
  8726. 01:23:18,924 --> 01:23:20,859
  8727. God, are those Gauloises?
  8728.  
  8729. 1900
  8730. 01:23:21,860 --> 01:23:23,461
  8731. Just, I'm so...
  8732.  
  8733. 1901
  8734. 01:23:24,763 --> 01:23:27,231
  8735. I'm just gonna bum one.
  8736.  
  8737. 1902
  8738. 01:23:29,333 --> 01:23:30,632
  8739. Just give me one sec.
  8740.  
  8741. 1903
  8742. 01:23:30,634 --> 01:23:31,703
  8743. Don't worry.
  8744.  
  8745. 1904
  8746. 01:23:39,878 --> 01:23:40,944
  8747. Bharath.
  8748.  
  8749. 1905
  8750. 01:23:40,946 --> 01:23:42,681
  8751. - Hello?
  8752. - <i>Listen.</i>
  8753.  
  8754. 1906
  8755. 01:23:43,949 --> 01:23:45,884
  8756. Mmm. Mmm.
  8757.  
  8758. 1907
  8759. 01:23:47,585 --> 01:23:52,389
  8760. You and I are in
  8761. the same boat, my friend.
  8762.  
  8763. 1908
  8764. 01:23:52,958 --> 01:23:54,624
  8765. How is that the case?
  8766.  
  8767. 1909
  8768. 01:23:54,626 --> 01:23:56,025
  8769. <i>We both have to
  8770. deal with my boss</i>
  8771.  
  8772. 1910
  8773. 01:23:56,027 --> 01:23:59,428
  8774. and we both think
  8775. he is an asshole.
  8776.  
  8777. 1911
  8778. 01:23:59,430 --> 01:24:01,497
  8779. You also think
  8780. he's an asshole?
  8781.  
  8782. 1912
  8783. 01:24:01,499 --> 01:24:02,999
  8784. Oh, my God,
  8785. he's such an asshole.
  8786.  
  8787. 1913
  8788. 01:24:03,001 --> 01:24:04,868
  8789. His stupid fucking TV show
  8790.  
  8791. 1914
  8792. 01:24:04,870 --> 01:24:06,803
  8793. was like,
  8794. good for three episodes
  8795.  
  8796. 1915
  8797. 01:24:06,805 --> 01:24:08,671
  8798. <i>and then it just didn't make
  8799. any sense.</i>
  8800.  
  8801. 1916
  8802. 01:24:08,673 --> 01:24:10,809
  8803. Fuck,
  8804. it feels good to say that.
  8805.  
  8806. 1917
  8807. 01:24:13,845 --> 01:24:14,846
  8808. Listen.
  8809.  
  8810. 1918
  8811. 01:24:17,015 --> 01:24:21,084
  8812. You need to keep this
  8813. on the real DL.
  8814.  
  8815. 1919
  8816. 01:24:21,086 --> 01:24:24,521
  8817. We both know
  8818. that the U.S. does not
  8819.  
  8820. 1920
  8821. 01:24:24,523 --> 01:24:27,657
  8822. negotiate with terrorists.
  8823.  
  8824. 1921
  8825. 01:24:27,659 --> 01:24:33,062
  8826. But, we do negotiate
  8827. with homies.
  8828.  
  8829. 1922
  8830. 01:24:33,064 --> 01:24:35,698
  8831. So if you give us
  8832. our guy back,
  8833.  
  8834. 1923
  8835. 01:24:35,700 --> 01:24:39,836
  8836. I'm gonna hook you up
  8837. with a sweet aid package.
  8838.  
  8839. 1924
  8840. 01:24:39,838 --> 01:24:42,872
  8841. <i>So not only do you not have to
  8842. keep a guy hostage,</i>
  8843.  
  8844. 1925
  8845. 01:24:42,874 --> 01:24:46,643
  8846. which is a pretty
  8847. shitty thing to do.
  8848.  
  8849. 1926
  8850. 01:24:46,645 --> 01:24:48,444
  8851. I mean, I've done it myself.
  8852.  
  8853. 1927
  8854. 01:24:48,446 --> 01:24:50,515
  8855. Don't tell anybody,
  8856. super classified.
  8857.  
  8858. 1928
  8859. 01:24:51,516 --> 01:24:53,116
  8860. It sucks, I hate it.
  8861.  
  8862. 1929
  8863. 01:24:53,118 --> 01:24:58,421
  8864. Yeah. So,
  8865. why don't we instead
  8866.  
  8867. 1930
  8868. 01:24:58,423 --> 01:25:02,091
  8869. save a ton of lives?
  8870.  
  8871. 1931
  8872. 01:25:02,093 --> 01:25:05,495
  8873. I mean, that's pretty
  8874. fucking awesome, right?
  8875.  
  8876. 1932
  8877. 01:25:05,497 --> 01:25:07,098
  8878. I think this is
  8879. a really good idea.
  8880.  
  8881. 1933
  8882. 01:25:10,569 --> 01:25:11,736
  8883. What do you say?
  8884.  
  8885. 1934
  8886. 01:25:14,472 --> 01:25:15,907
  8887. Ma'am.
  8888.  
  8889. 1935
  8890. 01:25:20,779 --> 01:25:22,979
  8891. Hostage saved, motherfuckers!
  8892.  
  8893. 1936
  8894. 01:25:22,981 --> 01:25:25,715
  8895. Yeah, yeah!
  8896.  
  8897. 1937
  8898. 01:25:25,717 --> 01:25:28,685
  8899. - She did it! She did it!
  8900. - She did it!
  8901.  
  8902. 1938
  8903. 01:25:28,687 --> 01:25:31,421
  8904. I'm here with Secretary
  8905. of State Charlotte Field.
  8906.  
  8907. 1939
  8908. 01:25:31,423 --> 01:25:33,857
  8909. Who, after a tense and
  8910. complicated negotiation
  8911.  
  8912. 1940
  8913. 01:25:33,859 --> 01:25:35,792
  8914. with Kashtar,
  8915. has secured the release
  8916.  
  8917. 1941
  8918. 01:25:35,794 --> 01:25:38,828
  8919. of the pilot of the U.S.
  8920. spy plane that went down
  8921.  
  8922. 1942
  8923. 01:25:38,830 --> 01:25:40,964
  8924. over Kashtari airspace.
  8925.  
  8926. 1943
  8927. 01:25:40,966 --> 01:25:43,032
  8928. - I know, right.
  8929. - Crazy.
  8930.  
  8931. 1944
  8932. 01:25:43,034 --> 01:25:44,101
  8933. And this is all
  8934. in the midst
  8935.  
  8936. 1945
  8937. 01:25:44,103 --> 01:25:46,703
  8938. of the success of
  8939. your environmental initiative,
  8940.  
  8941. 1946
  8942. 01:25:46,705 --> 01:25:50,140
  8943. which I understand has secured
  8944. the support of 100 countries.
  8945.  
  8946. 1947
  8947. 01:25:50,142 --> 01:25:51,708
  8948. - Yes, um...
  8949. - Ooh, sore subject.
  8950.  
  8951. 1948
  8952. 01:25:51,710 --> 01:25:53,443
  8953. I'm very happy
  8954. to announce that
  8955.  
  8956. 1949
  8957. 01:25:53,445 --> 01:25:56,180
  8958. not only do I have the support
  8959. of those 100 countries,
  8960.  
  8961. 1950
  8962. 01:25:56,182 --> 01:25:58,882
  8963. but the president himself
  8964. called me personally
  8965.  
  8966. 1951
  8967. 01:25:58,884 --> 01:26:00,985
  8968. just to tell me how psyched
  8969. he is about this initiative...
  8970.  
  8971. 1952
  8972. 01:26:00,987 --> 01:26:03,954
  8973. - Did he call? Did he call?
  8974. - That didn't happen.
  8975.  
  8976. 1953
  8977. 01:26:03,956 --> 01:26:05,189
  8978. ...don't change a word,
  8979.  
  8980. 1954
  8981. 01:26:05,191 --> 01:26:08,125
  8982. especially the part, uh,
  8983. with the trees.
  8984.  
  8985. 1955
  8986. 01:26:08,127 --> 01:26:09,759
  8987. - That's a lie.
  8988. - So, all in all,
  8989.  
  8990. 1956
  8991. 01:26:09,761 --> 01:26:10,860
  8992. I'm just... Well,
  8993.  
  8994. 1957
  8995. 01:26:10,862 --> 01:26:13,796
  8996. I kinda feel like I'm just
  8997. kinda crushing it right now.
  8998.  
  8999. 1958
  9000. 01:26:13,798 --> 01:26:16,102
  9001. Thank you so much. So...
  9002. Thank you.
  9003.  
  9004. 1959
  9005. 01:26:16,801 --> 01:26:17,868
  9006. Thank you.
  9007.  
  9008. 1960
  9009. 01:26:17,870 --> 01:26:20,204
  9010. The incredible
  9011. Charlotte Field.
  9012.  
  9013. 1961
  9014. 01:26:20,206 --> 01:26:22,538
  9015. Who clearly still feels
  9016. the effects
  9017.  
  9018. 1962
  9019. 01:26:22,540 --> 01:26:25,843
  9020. of the intense all-night
  9021. hostage situation.
  9022.  
  9023. 1963
  9024. 01:26:38,157 --> 01:26:41,025
  9025. <i>After negotiating the release
  9026. of Lieutenant Gary Smith...</i>
  9027.  
  9028. 1964
  9029. 01:26:41,027 --> 01:26:42,960
  9030. <i>Charlotte Field's popularity
  9031. continues to skyrocket...</i>
  9032.  
  9033. 1965
  9034. 01:26:42,962 --> 01:26:44,694
  9035. <i>In the newest Gallup poll,
  9036. 68%...</i>
  9037.  
  9038. 1966
  9039. 01:26:44,696 --> 01:26:47,998
  9040. <i>...are women mentally unfit
  9041. to hold the presidency?</i>
  9042.  
  9043. 1967
  9044. 01:26:48,000 --> 01:26:49,833
  9045. <i>Here to chat about it
  9046. is Chris Brown,</i>
  9047.  
  9048. 1968
  9049. 01:26:49,835 --> 01:26:52,202
  9050. <i>Jeremy Piven,
  9051. and Brett Ratner.</i>
  9052.  
  9053. 1969
  9054. 01:26:52,204 --> 01:26:55,005
  9055. <i>In the wake of her successful
  9056. hostage negotiation,</i>
  9057.  
  9058. 1970
  9059. 01:26:55,007 --> 01:26:57,207
  9060. <i>Charlotte Field's poll numbers
  9061. keep going up.</i>
  9062.  
  9063. 1971
  9064. 01:26:57,209 --> 01:26:58,574
  9065. <i>I'd like to apologize</i>
  9066.  
  9067. 1972
  9068. 01:26:58,576 --> 01:26:59,810
  9069. <i>to Charlotte,
  9070. and anyone out there</i>
  9071.  
  9072. 1973
  9073. 01:26:59,812 --> 01:27:03,049
  9074. <i>who was upset yesterday when
  9075. I called her Booby-McBoobson.</i>
  9076.  
  9077. 1974
  9078. 01:27:04,850 --> 01:27:06,052
  9079. Give me
  9080. the president's office.
  9081.  
  9082. 1975
  9083. 01:27:06,919 --> 01:27:08,986
  9084. Yep?
  9085.  
  9086. 1976
  9087. 01:27:08,988 --> 01:27:10,621
  9088. Can I talk to you
  9089. for a second?
  9090.  
  9091. 1977
  9092. 01:27:10,623 --> 01:27:12,122
  9093. Of course.
  9094.  
  9095. 1978
  9096. 01:27:12,124 --> 01:27:14,091
  9097. We got some new polling that
  9098. I thought I'd share with you.
  9099.  
  9100. 1979
  9101. 01:27:14,093 --> 01:27:15,225
  9102. All right.
  9103.  
  9104. 1980
  9105. 01:27:15,227 --> 01:27:16,794
  9106. It feels like
  9107. everything
  9108.  
  9109. 1981
  9110. 01:27:16,796 --> 01:27:18,028
  9111. is kinda falling into place
  9112. for us.
  9113.  
  9114. 1982
  9115. 01:27:18,030 --> 01:27:19,663
  9116. So we thought
  9117. we'd dig a little deeper
  9118.  
  9119. 1983
  9120. 01:27:19,665 --> 01:27:21,065
  9121. and make sure
  9122. there are no surprises.
  9123.  
  9124. 1984
  9125. 01:27:21,067 --> 01:27:22,800
  9126. - Why are you acting so weird?
  9127. - It's good.
  9128.  
  9129. 1985
  9130. 01:27:22,802 --> 01:27:24,704
  9131. We got some really
  9132. helpful feedback.
  9133.  
  9134. 1986
  9135. 01:27:25,938 --> 01:27:27,671
  9136. From the public.
  9137.  
  9138. 1987
  9139. 01:27:27,673 --> 01:27:30,941
  9140. So we asked
  9141. a thousand constituents
  9142.  
  9143. 1988
  9144. 01:27:30,943 --> 01:27:32,676
  9145. how they would feel
  9146.  
  9147. 1989
  9148. 01:27:32,678 --> 01:27:35,746
  9149. - if, say, Princess Di...
  9150. - Hmm.
  9151.  
  9152. 1990
  9153. 01:27:35,748 --> 01:27:37,116
  9154. ...if she were to
  9155. start dating
  9156.  
  9157. 1991
  9158. 01:27:38,017 --> 01:27:39,018
  9159. Guy Fieri.
  9160.  
  9161. 1992
  9162. 01:27:40,720 --> 01:27:42,619
  9163. I don't even know
  9164. who that is.
  9165.  
  9166. 1993
  9167. 01:27:42,621 --> 01:27:44,121
  9168. They
  9169. don't like that.
  9170.  
  9171. 1994
  9172. 01:27:44,123 --> 01:27:46,724
  9173. - Yeah.
  9174. - Or Kate Middleton
  9175.  
  9176. 1995
  9177. 01:27:46,726 --> 01:27:48,926
  9178. were to start dating
  9179. Danny DeVito.
  9180.  
  9181. 1996
  9182. 01:27:48,928 --> 01:27:50,027
  9183. I see where you're
  9184. going with this.
  9185.  
  9186. 1997
  9187. 01:27:50,029 --> 01:27:51,328
  9188. Pretty negative reaction.
  9189.  
  9190. 1998
  9191. 01:27:51,330 --> 01:27:53,998
  9192. Or if Jennifer Lawrence
  9193.  
  9194. 1999
  9195. 01:27:54,000 --> 01:27:57,169
  9196. were to start dating this
  9197. potato in a teal windbreaker.
  9198.  
  9199. 2000
  9200. 01:27:58,237 --> 01:28:00,137
  9201. They would be very upset.
  9202.  
  9203. 2001
  9204. 01:28:00,139 --> 01:28:01,638
  9205. You did a lot of work,
  9206.  
  9207. 2002
  9208. 01:28:01,640 --> 01:28:03,607
  9209. - and I...
  9210. - Well, but, can I just finish?
  9211.  
  9212. 2003
  9213. 01:28:03,609 --> 01:28:05,843
  9214. No, that's, like, a lot of...
  9215. I get it.
  9216.  
  9217. 2004
  9218. 01:28:05,845 --> 01:28:07,745
  9219. Madam Secretary.
  9220. I have no desire
  9221.  
  9222. 2005
  9223. 01:28:07,747 --> 01:28:09,780
  9224. - to limit your romantic life.
  9225. - Good.
  9226.  
  9227. 2006
  9228. 01:28:09,782 --> 01:28:12,616
  9229. But the optics of you and Fred
  9230.  
  9231. 2007
  9232. 01:28:12,618 --> 01:28:15,085
  9233. will make a presidential run
  9234. very challenging.
  9235.  
  9236. 2008
  9237. 01:28:15,087 --> 01:28:16,321
  9238. Fred is a journalist.
  9239.  
  9240. 2009
  9241. 01:28:16,323 --> 01:28:18,655
  9242. Who's written some
  9243. extremely fucked-up stuff.
  9244.  
  9245. 2010
  9246. 01:28:18,657 --> 01:28:21,660
  9247. No. That's exposed some
  9248. really fucked-up stuff.
  9249.  
  9250. 2011
  9251. 01:28:22,795 --> 01:28:25,029
  9252. And I just want to know
  9253. for myself,
  9254.  
  9255. 2012
  9256. 01:28:25,031 --> 01:28:28,032
  9257. you're comfortable with putting
  9258. everything on the line for a hookup?
  9259.  
  9260. 2013
  9261. 01:28:28,034 --> 01:28:29,767
  9262. Oh, my God.
  9263.  
  9264. 2014
  9265. 01:28:29,769 --> 01:28:30,934
  9266. Why are we having
  9267. this conversation?
  9268.  
  9269. 2015
  9270. 01:28:30,936 --> 01:28:32,270
  9271. This is insane.
  9272.  
  9273. 2016
  9274. 01:28:32,272 --> 01:28:35,172
  9275. I don't have to explain myself
  9276. to you.
  9277.  
  9278. 2017
  9279. 01:28:35,174 --> 01:28:36,907
  9280. I'm sorry. I really don't
  9281. understand this.
  9282.  
  9283. 2018
  9284. 01:28:36,909 --> 01:28:38,309
  9285. And I fucking love you,
  9286. Charlotte.
  9287.  
  9288. 2019
  9289. 01:28:38,311 --> 01:28:39,310
  9290. I want you to be happy.
  9291.  
  9292. 2020
  9293. 01:28:39,312 --> 01:28:40,911
  9294. But more than that,
  9295. I want you to be in charge.
  9296.  
  9297. 2021
  9298. 01:28:40,913 --> 01:28:42,846
  9299. And I want you
  9300. to be president.
  9301.  
  9302. 2022
  9303. 01:28:42,848 --> 01:28:44,984
  9304. For the sake of the future
  9305. of our country.
  9306.  
  9307. 2023
  9308. 01:28:48,988 --> 01:28:50,656
  9309. Look, there's another option.
  9310.  
  9311. 2024
  9312. 01:28:52,024 --> 01:28:53,324
  9313. There's a guy who works
  9314. for the Secret Service
  9315.  
  9316. 2025
  9317. 01:28:53,326 --> 01:28:57,395
  9318. whose job it is to handle
  9319. the mistresses...
  9320.  
  9321. 2026
  9322. 01:28:57,397 --> 01:28:58,962
  9323. Maggie. You're gonna
  9324. have to stop.
  9325.  
  9326. 2027
  9327. 01:28:58,964 --> 01:29:01,199
  9328. And there are a series
  9329. of tunnels in the White House
  9330.  
  9331. 2028
  9332. 01:29:01,201 --> 01:29:02,802
  9333. - that Woodrow Wilson...
  9334. - That's enough.
  9335.  
  9336. 2029
  9337. 01:29:05,072 --> 01:29:06,804
  9338. Fred is not an idea
  9339.  
  9340. 2030
  9341. 01:29:06,806 --> 01:29:09,240
  9342. that I'm floating by you
  9343. for your approval.
  9344.  
  9345. 2031
  9346. 01:29:09,242 --> 01:29:11,278
  9347. And you're getting very close
  9348. to crossing a line.
  9349.  
  9350. 2032
  9351. 01:29:17,017 --> 01:29:18,316
  9352. Okay. Got it.
  9353.  
  9354. 2033
  9355. 01:29:18,318 --> 01:29:19,752
  9356. Goodnight, Madam Secretary.
  9357.  
  9358. 2034
  9359. 01:29:25,691 --> 01:29:27,791
  9360. <i>When I grow up,
  9361. I want to be Charlotte Field.</i>
  9362.  
  9363. 2035
  9364. 01:29:27,793 --> 01:29:29,160
  9365. <i>Because she's smart and pretty</i>
  9366.  
  9367. 2036
  9368. 01:29:29,162 --> 01:29:30,794
  9369. <i>and she's going to be
  9370. president.</i>
  9371.  
  9372. 2037
  9373. 01:29:39,039 --> 01:29:41,873
  9374. I will be that
  9375. little girl's president.
  9376.  
  9377. 2038
  9378. 01:29:41,875 --> 01:29:45,110
  9379. Thank you,
  9380. and God bless America.
  9381.  
  9382. 2039
  9383. 01:29:45,112 --> 01:29:48,279
  9384. Massive applause.
  9385. Massive cheering.
  9386.  
  9387. 2040
  9388. 01:29:48,281 --> 01:29:50,415
  9389. At that point, I think
  9390. the stage would descend,
  9391.  
  9392. 2041
  9393. 01:29:50,417 --> 01:29:54,219
  9394. right, and then Lil Uzi Vert
  9395. or Charli XCX
  9396.  
  9397. 2042
  9398. 01:29:54,221 --> 01:29:56,687
  9399. would join hands
  9400. with the Harlem Boys Choir...
  9401.  
  9402. 2043
  9403. 01:29:56,689 --> 01:29:58,356
  9404. Well, I said we'll figure
  9405. that out later.
  9406.  
  9407. 2044
  9408. 01:30:00,260 --> 01:30:01,793
  9409. Uh, Madam Secretary,
  9410.  
  9411. 2045
  9412. 01:30:01,795 --> 01:30:03,163
  9413. the president would like to
  9414. see you right now.
  9415.  
  9416. 2046
  9417. 01:30:03,897 --> 01:30:05,031
  9418. Shit.
  9419.  
  9420. 2047
  9421. 01:30:06,066 --> 01:30:07,132
  9422. Damn it!
  9423.  
  9424. 2048
  9425. 01:30:07,134 --> 01:30:08,401
  9426. The nation is at war!
  9427.  
  9428. 2049
  9429. 01:30:09,302 --> 01:30:10,502
  9430. I find myself torn.
  9431.  
  9432. 2050
  9433. 01:30:10,504 --> 01:30:15,106
  9434. Torn between my personal love
  9435. and my love of country...
  9436.  
  9437. 2051
  9438. 01:30:15,108 --> 01:30:16,774
  9439. Sir, is this a good time?
  9440.  
  9441. 2052
  9442. 01:30:16,776 --> 01:30:19,811
  9443. Oh, hi, Charlotte.
  9444. No, I'm just running lines.
  9445.  
  9446. 2053
  9447. 01:30:19,813 --> 01:30:20,845
  9448. - Oh.
  9449. - All right.
  9450.  
  9451. 2054
  9452. 01:30:20,847 --> 01:30:22,649
  9453. Clear the room. Everybody,
  9454. just Charlotte, please.
  9455.  
  9456. 2055
  9457. 01:30:26,086 --> 01:30:27,087
  9458. Thanks.
  9459.  
  9460. 2056
  9461. 01:30:30,390 --> 01:30:32,025
  9462. Is everything okay, sir?
  9463.  
  9464. 2057
  9465. 01:30:33,093 --> 01:30:35,295
  9466. Oh, look who it is.
  9467.  
  9468. 2058
  9469. 01:30:36,029 --> 01:30:38,830
  9470. She's here at last.
  9471.  
  9472. 2059
  9473. 01:30:38,832 --> 01:30:41,266
  9474. You gotta love that
  9475. secret door. Sit down.
  9476.  
  9477. 2060
  9478. 01:30:45,739 --> 01:30:47,238
  9479. This feels like an ambush.
  9480.  
  9481. 2061
  9482. 01:30:47,240 --> 01:30:49,274
  9483. Well, in the
  9484. entertainment world,
  9485.  
  9486. 2062
  9487. 01:30:49,276 --> 01:30:51,442
  9488. we call this a surprise
  9489. walk-on.
  9490.  
  9491. 2063
  9492. 01:30:51,444 --> 01:30:52,877
  9493. You see, Charlotte,
  9494.  
  9495. 2064
  9496. 01:30:52,879 --> 01:30:55,446
  9497. we have a number of
  9498. business interests
  9499.  
  9500. 2065
  9501. 01:30:55,448 --> 01:30:58,316
  9502. and that, you know,
  9503. may be gravely affected
  9504.  
  9505. 2066
  9506. 01:30:58,318 --> 01:31:00,285
  9507. by this agreement of yours.
  9508.  
  9509. 2067
  9510. 01:31:00,287 --> 01:31:02,787
  9511. Yeah. Uh, aside from
  9512. getting into film,
  9513.  
  9514. 2068
  9515. 01:31:02,789 --> 01:31:05,423
  9516. I'm looking to use
  9517. my connections as president
  9518.  
  9519. 2069
  9520. 01:31:05,425 --> 01:31:07,459
  9521. to expand
  9522. my investment portfolio.
  9523.  
  9524. 2070
  9525. 01:31:07,461 --> 01:31:10,128
  9526. Sort of like an Ashton Kutcher
  9527. type thing, you know.
  9528.  
  9529. 2071
  9530. 01:31:10,130 --> 01:31:13,064
  9531. I mean, that guy is killing
  9532. with acting and investing...
  9533.  
  9534. 2072
  9535. 01:31:13,066 --> 01:31:15,900
  9536. I think what the president
  9537. is trying to say,
  9538.  
  9539. 2073
  9540. 01:31:15,902 --> 01:31:18,803
  9541. is that the server farm
  9542. we want to build in Alaska
  9543.  
  9544. 2074
  9545. 01:31:18,805 --> 01:31:22,240
  9546. is sitting on 10 miles of land
  9547. which will now be
  9548.  
  9549. 2075
  9550. 01:31:22,242 --> 01:31:24,144
  9551. protected by your initiative.
  9552.  
  9553. 2076
  9554. 01:31:24,945 --> 01:31:26,211
  9555. Move your server farm.
  9556.  
  9557. 2077
  9558. 01:31:26,213 --> 01:31:28,079
  9559. We want to
  9560. build it in Alaska.
  9561.  
  9562. 2078
  9563. 01:31:28,081 --> 01:31:29,847
  9564. There's plenty of room
  9565. for expansion.
  9566.  
  9567. 2079
  9568. 01:31:29,849 --> 01:31:32,817
  9569. Charlotte. I'm surprised
  9570. that it's come to this.
  9571.  
  9572. 2080
  9573. 01:31:32,819 --> 01:31:34,520
  9574. You're usually so agreeable.
  9575.  
  9576. 2081
  9577. 01:31:34,522 --> 01:31:36,955
  9578. But I watched you
  9579. undermine me
  9580.  
  9581. 2082
  9582. 01:31:36,957 --> 01:31:38,990
  9583. on TV the other day.
  9584.  
  9585. 2083
  9586. 01:31:38,992 --> 01:31:41,059
  9587. TV of all places.
  9588.  
  9589. 2084
  9590. 01:31:41,061 --> 01:31:43,094
  9591. That's my medium. All right?
  9592.  
  9593. 2085
  9594. 01:31:43,096 --> 01:31:46,798
  9595. You used TV against me!
  9596.  
  9597. 2086
  9598. 01:31:46,800 --> 01:31:49,268
  9599. That was your first mistake.
  9600.  
  9601. 2087
  9602. 01:31:49,270 --> 01:31:52,204
  9603. Look, I'm about to give you
  9604. the easiest ultimatum
  9605.  
  9606. 2088
  9607. 01:31:52,206 --> 01:31:54,275
  9608. that you're ever,
  9609. ever gonna receive.
  9610.  
  9611. 2089
  9612. 01:31:56,076 --> 01:31:57,809
  9613. Drop the tree thing.
  9614.  
  9615. 2090
  9616. 01:31:57,811 --> 01:32:00,246
  9617. - Or?
  9618. - Or...
  9619.  
  9620. 2091
  9621. 01:32:00,248 --> 01:32:06,252
  9622. We will release the content
  9623. of your friend's hard drive.
  9624.  
  9625. 2092
  9626. 01:32:06,254 --> 01:32:08,987
  9627. We found
  9628. a lot of interesting stuff
  9629.  
  9630. 2093
  9631. 01:32:08,989 --> 01:32:10,589
  9632. when we hacked
  9633. into his webcam.
  9634.  
  9635. 2094
  9636. 01:32:10,591 --> 01:32:12,859
  9637. Now here is a little taster.
  9638.  
  9639. 2095
  9640. 01:32:16,062 --> 01:32:19,164
  9641. <i>Yo, Charlotte, it's Fred.</i>
  9642.  
  9643. 2096
  9644. 01:32:19,166 --> 01:32:20,999
  9645. <i>Uh, you want
  9646. to come to my room</i>
  9647.  
  9648. 2097
  9649. 01:32:21,001 --> 01:32:23,168
  9650. <i>and have sex with me
  9651. really fast?</i>
  9652.  
  9653. 2098
  9654. 01:32:23,170 --> 01:32:26,272
  9655. <i>Oh no, don't worry. I'll find
  9656. ways to kill time today.</i>
  9657.  
  9658. 2099
  9659. 01:32:26,274 --> 01:32:28,073
  9660. <i>It's cool. Just let me know
  9661. when you're back.</i>
  9662.  
  9663. 2100
  9664. 01:32:28,075 --> 01:32:29,143
  9665. <i>Great.</i>
  9666.  
  9667. 2101
  9668. 01:32:33,547 --> 01:32:35,314
  9669. <i>...important to me.</i>
  9670.  
  9671. 2102
  9672. 01:32:35,316 --> 01:32:37,949
  9673. <i>That's a good speech.</i>
  9674.  
  9675. 2103
  9676. 01:32:37,951 --> 01:32:39,951
  9677. <i>The band of misfits
  9678. fight back...</i>
  9679.  
  9680. 2104
  9681. 01:32:39,953 --> 01:32:41,855
  9682. - <i>Nice dress.</i>
  9683. - <i>...against the bullies.</i>
  9684.  
  9685. 2105
  9686. 01:32:43,190 --> 01:32:44,390
  9687. <i>Never giving up.</i>
  9688.  
  9689. 2106
  9690. 01:32:44,392 --> 01:32:45,524
  9691. <i>Never laying down.</i>
  9692.  
  9693. 2107
  9694. 01:32:48,596 --> 01:32:50,095
  9695. <i>In high school,</i>
  9696.  
  9697. 2108
  9698. 01:32:50,097 --> 01:32:51,365
  9699. <i>I would talk about
  9700. the underdog a lot.</i>
  9701.  
  9702. 2109
  9703. 01:32:53,634 --> 01:32:56,368
  9704. <i>And I would often find myself
  9705. on a soapbox</i>
  9706.  
  9707. 2110
  9708. 01:32:56,370 --> 01:32:59,104
  9709. <i>rambling on and on
  9710. about the injustices</i>
  9711.  
  9712. 2111
  9713. 01:32:59,106 --> 01:33:00,274
  9714. <i>of the world.</i>
  9715.  
  9716. 2112
  9717. 01:33:02,443 --> 01:33:04,176
  9718. <i>Which makes you
  9719. extremely popular...</i>
  9720.  
  9721. 2113
  9722. 01:33:05,913 --> 01:33:07,479
  9723. <i>...especially when everybody
  9724. would rather be watching</i>
  9725.  
  9726. 2114
  9727. 01:33:07,481 --> 01:33:09,248
  9728. Beverly Hills, 90210.
  9729.  
  9730. 2115
  9731. 01:33:17,091 --> 01:33:19,091
  9732. Oh, wow.
  9733.  
  9734. 2116
  9735. 01:33:24,098 --> 01:33:25,900
  9736. <i>Oh, boy!</i>
  9737.  
  9738. 2117
  9739. 01:33:28,936 --> 01:33:31,537
  9740. <i>Oh, no...</i>
  9741.  
  9742. 2118
  9743. 01:33:31,539 --> 01:33:33,005
  9744. <i>Yucky.</i>
  9745.  
  9746. 2119
  9747. 01:33:35,309 --> 01:33:36,375
  9748. <i>Oh, boy!</i>
  9749.  
  9750. 2120
  9751. 01:33:36,377 --> 01:33:38,079
  9752. What the fuck?
  9753.  
  9754. 2121
  9755. 01:33:39,413 --> 01:33:44,383
  9756. Oh, my God! I'm so sorry.
  9757. I'm so sorry this happened.
  9758.  
  9759. 2122
  9760. 01:33:44,385 --> 01:33:46,118
  9761. - You don't have to be sorry.
  9762. - What do we do?
  9763.  
  9764. 2123
  9765. 01:33:46,120 --> 01:33:48,120
  9766. This is what everyone
  9767. was afraid was gonna happen,
  9768.  
  9769. 2124
  9770. 01:33:48,122 --> 01:33:49,188
  9771. because of me.
  9772.  
  9773. 2125
  9774. 01:33:49,190 --> 01:33:50,623
  9775. And now it's happening
  9776. because of me.
  9777.  
  9778. 2126
  9779. 01:33:50,625 --> 01:33:51,924
  9780. - Do I get a publicist?
  9781. - No.
  9782.  
  9783. 2127
  9784. 01:33:51,926 --> 01:33:53,158
  9785. - Do I do a publicity tour?
  9786. - Stop.
  9787.  
  9788. 2128
  9789. 01:33:53,160 --> 01:33:54,326
  9790. Do we have
  9791. a press conference?
  9792.  
  9793. 2129
  9794. 01:33:54,328 --> 01:33:57,298
  9795. Fred, listen to me.
  9796. I took the deal.
  9797.  
  9798. 2130
  9799. 01:33:58,933 --> 01:33:59,998
  9800. What?
  9801.  
  9802. 2131
  9803. 01:34:00,000 --> 01:34:01,333
  9804. We scratched the tree thing
  9805.  
  9806. 2132
  9807. 01:34:01,335 --> 01:34:03,936
  9808. and I have a real shot
  9809. at becoming president.
  9810.  
  9811. 2133
  9812. 01:34:03,938 --> 01:34:09,041
  9813. And some billionaire
  9814. motherfucker
  9815.  
  9816. 2134
  9817. 01:34:09,043 --> 01:34:12,978
  9818. gets to blackmail you?
  9819. Using me?
  9820.  
  9821. 2135
  9822. 01:34:12,980 --> 01:34:15,247
  9823. Doing something
  9824. that everybody does?
  9825.  
  9826. 2136
  9827. 01:34:15,249 --> 01:34:17,249
  9828. Out of a policy
  9829. that you cared about,
  9830.  
  9831. 2137
  9832. 01:34:17,251 --> 01:34:18,718
  9833. since you were
  9834. in middle school.
  9835.  
  9836. 2138
  9837. 01:34:18,720 --> 01:34:20,452
  9838. Since I've known you,
  9839. you've cared about this.
  9840.  
  9841. 2139
  9842. 01:34:20,454 --> 01:34:22,054
  9843. And now you're just gonna
  9844. get rid of it?
  9845.  
  9846. 2140
  9847. 01:34:22,056 --> 01:34:26,258
  9848. I'm trying to compromise here
  9849. for a bigger goal.
  9850.  
  9851. 2141
  9852. 01:34:26,260 --> 01:34:27,393
  9853. Well, I don't think
  9854. you should right now.
  9855.  
  9856. 2142
  9857. 01:34:27,395 --> 01:34:28,495
  9858. Oh, my God!
  9859.  
  9860. 2143
  9861. 01:34:28,497 --> 01:34:30,095
  9862. Of course
  9863. you don't think I should.
  9864.  
  9865. 2144
  9866. 01:34:30,097 --> 01:34:32,097
  9867. You never compromise
  9868. for anything in your life,
  9869.  
  9870. 2145
  9871. 01:34:32,099 --> 01:34:33,733
  9872. which gives you
  9873. the perfect excuse to fail.
  9874.  
  9875. 2146
  9876. 01:34:33,735 --> 01:34:36,636
  9877. Well, it's better than
  9878. maybe bending over backwards
  9879.  
  9880. 2147
  9881. 01:34:36,638 --> 01:34:38,103
  9882. for anyone who asked,
  9883.  
  9884. 2148
  9885. 01:34:38,105 --> 01:34:39,539
  9886. to the point that
  9887. you don't even know
  9888.  
  9889. 2149
  9890. 01:34:39,541 --> 01:34:41,140
  9891. why the fuck you're doing
  9892. this shit anymore!
  9893.  
  9894. 2150
  9895. 01:34:41,142 --> 01:34:42,742
  9896. In my world,
  9897. in order to achieve
  9898.  
  9899. 2151
  9900. 01:34:42,744 --> 01:34:44,677
  9901. what I'm trying to achieve,
  9902. I have to compromise.
  9903.  
  9904. 2152
  9905. 01:34:44,679 --> 01:34:45,745
  9906. Oh, why,
  9907. because you're a woman?
  9908.  
  9909. 2153
  9910. 01:34:45,747 --> 01:34:47,146
  9911. Yeah, motherfucker.
  9912.  
  9913. 2154
  9914. 01:34:47,148 --> 01:34:48,381
  9915. Okay, that makes sense.
  9916.  
  9917. 2155
  9918. 01:34:48,383 --> 01:34:50,983
  9919. And because I'm not giving up
  9920. everything I've ever wanted
  9921.  
  9922. 2156
  9923. 01:34:50,985 --> 01:34:53,285
  9924. just because it doesn't
  9925. live up to your moral code.
  9926.  
  9927. 2157
  9928. 01:34:53,287 --> 01:34:55,555
  9929. I don't care if this tape
  9930. comes out. I really don't.
  9931.  
  9932. 2158
  9933. 01:34:55,557 --> 01:34:57,590
  9934. - Oh, my God, Fred.
  9935. - I'll be okay.
  9936.  
  9937. 2159
  9938. 01:34:57,592 --> 01:34:59,461
  9939. You don't have to
  9940. do this for me.
  9941.  
  9942. 2160
  9943. 01:35:01,496 --> 01:35:03,365
  9944. You're not doing this for me.
  9945.  
  9946. 2161
  9947. 01:35:04,566 --> 01:35:06,098
  9948. Obviously.
  9949.  
  9950. 2162
  9951. 01:35:06,100 --> 01:35:10,035
  9952. Look, you and I both know
  9953.  
  9954. 2163
  9955. 01:35:10,037 --> 01:35:12,004
  9956. the woman who stands
  9957. beside the guy
  9958.  
  9959. 2164
  9960. 01:35:12,006 --> 01:35:14,340
  9961. that's coming on his face
  9962. gets way more scrutiny
  9963.  
  9964. 2165
  9965. 01:35:14,342 --> 01:35:17,343
  9966. than the guy who's actually
  9967. coming on his face.
  9968.  
  9969. 2166
  9970. 01:35:17,345 --> 01:35:19,111
  9971. Don't know if that's
  9972. happened enough
  9973.  
  9974. 2167
  9975. 01:35:19,113 --> 01:35:20,680
  9976. for there to be, like,
  9977. a precedent for it.
  9978.  
  9979. 2168
  9980. 01:35:20,682 --> 01:35:23,383
  9981. So, who knows? Maybe that
  9982. won't be the case this time.
  9983.  
  9984. 2169
  9985. 01:35:23,385 --> 01:35:25,185
  9986. Who knows? Maybe people
  9987. will think it's romantic.
  9988.  
  9989. 2170
  9990. 01:35:25,187 --> 01:35:26,719
  9991. I'm jerking...
  9992. I'm jerking off to you.
  9993.  
  9994. 2171
  9995. 01:35:26,721 --> 01:35:28,354
  9996. You don't know how people
  9997. are gonna react.
  9998.  
  9999. 2172
  10000. 01:35:28,356 --> 01:35:30,358
  10001. I'm not taking that risk.
  10002.  
  10003. 2173
  10004. 01:35:34,329 --> 01:35:35,397
  10005. I can't do it.
  10006.  
  10007. 2174
  10008. 01:35:36,798 --> 01:35:38,266
  10009. Okay.
  10010.  
  10011. 2175
  10012. 01:35:44,339 --> 01:35:48,210
  10013. So the video doesn't come out,
  10014. what happens to us?
  10015.  
  10016. 2176
  10017. 01:35:53,548 --> 01:35:57,717
  10018. I was talking to Maggie,
  10019. and she knows
  10020.  
  10021. 2177
  10022. 01:35:57,719 --> 01:36:00,186
  10023. this consultant who could
  10024. scrub your history.
  10025.  
  10026. 2178
  10027. 01:36:00,188 --> 01:36:01,721
  10028. We could make sure
  10029. nothing else like this
  10030.  
  10031. 2179
  10032. 01:36:01,723 --> 01:36:04,092
  10033. pops up and surprises us.
  10034.  
  10035. 2180
  10036. 01:36:04,626 --> 01:36:05,792
  10037. And then we just...
  10038.  
  10039. 2181
  10040. 01:36:05,794 --> 01:36:07,227
  10041. We work on your image,
  10042.  
  10043. 2182
  10044. 01:36:07,229 --> 01:36:09,162
  10045. and we figure out
  10046. how we want to
  10047.  
  10048. 2183
  10049. 01:36:09,164 --> 01:36:11,631
  10050. present ourselves
  10051. as a couple to the public.
  10052.  
  10053. 2184
  10054. 01:36:11,633 --> 01:36:12,767
  10055. That's all.
  10056.  
  10057. 2185
  10058. 01:36:18,073 --> 01:36:20,206
  10059. - Okay.
  10060. - Okay.
  10061.  
  10062. 2186
  10063. 01:36:20,208 --> 01:36:21,374
  10064. How long...
  10065. How long will it take,
  10066.  
  10067. 2187
  10068. 01:36:21,376 --> 01:36:24,344
  10069. do you think, to create
  10070.  
  10071. 2188
  10072. 01:36:24,346 --> 01:36:27,247
  10073. an image of me that we can
  10074. present to the public?
  10075.  
  10076. 2189
  10077. 01:36:27,249 --> 01:36:30,818
  10078. Just through the first couple
  10079. months of the campaign.
  10080.  
  10081. 2190
  10082. 01:36:30,820 --> 01:36:33,386
  10083. You think? But you don't
  10084. know that, right?
  10085.  
  10086. 2191
  10087. 01:36:33,388 --> 01:36:34,687
  10088. It could take longer
  10089. than that.
  10090.  
  10091. 2192
  10092. 01:36:34,689 --> 01:36:37,090
  10093. In a couple of months,
  10094. you could find that it's not a good moment
  10095.  
  10096. 2193
  10097. 01:36:37,092 --> 01:36:39,626
  10098. to introduce
  10099. a new boyfriend, right?
  10100.  
  10101. 2194
  10102. 01:36:39,628 --> 01:36:41,829
  10103. And then we'd have to wait
  10104. a couple more months.
  10105.  
  10106. 2195
  10107. 01:36:41,831 --> 01:36:44,432
  10108. I don't know how long
  10109. it's gonna take, Fred.
  10110.  
  10111. 2196
  10112. 01:36:45,300 --> 01:36:47,567
  10113. And then meanwhile,
  10114.  
  10115. 2197
  10116. 01:36:47,569 --> 01:36:49,471
  10117. you're pretending
  10118. not to date me.
  10119.  
  10120. 2198
  10121. 01:36:50,639 --> 01:36:53,506
  10122. And you're scrubbing
  10123. my Internet history?
  10124.  
  10125. 2199
  10126. 01:36:53,508 --> 01:36:55,275
  10127. So my articles are gone.
  10128.  
  10129. 2200
  10130. 01:36:55,277 --> 01:36:57,210
  10131. And you, like, sneak me around
  10132.  
  10133. 2201
  10134. 01:36:57,212 --> 01:36:59,178
  10135. like I'm Marilyn Monroe
  10136. and you're JFK?
  10137.  
  10138. 2202
  10139. 01:36:59,180 --> 01:37:00,346
  10140. Is that what
  10141. we're talking about?
  10142.  
  10143. 2203
  10144. 01:37:00,348 --> 01:37:03,483
  10145. I just want to be clear,
  10146. that's what we're talking about.
  10147.  
  10148. 2204
  10149. 01:37:03,485 --> 01:37:05,821
  10150. And we have to do that
  10151. because I'm...
  10152.  
  10153. 2205
  10154. 01:37:07,355 --> 01:37:08,523
  10155. ...not right.
  10156.  
  10157. 2206
  10158. 01:37:10,358 --> 01:37:13,126
  10159. And then once we present us
  10160. to the world,
  10161.  
  10162. 2207
  10163. 01:37:13,128 --> 01:37:17,667
  10164. we present a version of me
  10165. that isn't... actually me?
  10166.  
  10167. 2208
  10168. 01:37:21,369 --> 01:37:22,437
  10169. Yeah.
  10170.  
  10171. 2209
  10172. 01:37:31,814 --> 01:37:33,248
  10173. I can't do it.
  10174.  
  10175. 2210
  10176. 01:37:35,383 --> 01:37:37,484
  10177. I wish
  10178.  
  10179. 2211
  10180. 01:37:37,486 --> 01:37:40,590
  10181. that I was the type of person
  10182. that could, but I can't.
  10183.  
  10184. 2212
  10185. 01:37:49,765 --> 01:37:51,366
  10186. You don't have to do it.
  10187.  
  10188. 2213
  10189. 01:38:12,488 --> 01:38:14,488
  10190. Don't know what the fuck
  10191. I was thinking.
  10192.  
  10193. 2214
  10194. 01:38:14,490 --> 01:38:18,425
  10195. Why the fuck
  10196. I thought someone like her
  10197.  
  10198. 2215
  10199. 01:38:18,427 --> 01:38:20,259
  10200. and someone like me
  10201. could work?
  10202.  
  10203. 2216
  10204. 01:38:20,261 --> 01:38:23,397
  10205. She's a fucking politician.
  10206. Like, I don't even know her.
  10207.  
  10208. 2217
  10209. 01:38:23,399 --> 01:38:25,966
  10210. Like, I don't know who she is.
  10211.  
  10212. 2218
  10213. 01:38:25,968 --> 01:38:28,936
  10214. She has no moral compass.
  10215.  
  10216. 2219
  10217. 01:38:28,938 --> 01:38:31,605
  10218. She's working with fucking
  10219. Democrats one day,
  10220.  
  10221. 2220
  10222. 01:38:31,607 --> 01:38:33,240
  10223. Republicans the next
  10224. fucking day.
  10225.  
  10226. 2221
  10227. 01:38:33,242 --> 01:38:34,308
  10228. I mean, what's wrong
  10229. with working
  10230.  
  10231. 2222
  10232. 01:38:34,310 --> 01:38:35,676
  10233. with Democrats
  10234. and Republicans?
  10235.  
  10236. 2223
  10237. 01:38:35,678 --> 01:38:37,411
  10238. That's...
  10239. That's the whole country.
  10240.  
  10241. 2224
  10242. 01:38:37,413 --> 01:38:40,614
  10243. Uh, yeah,
  10244. except fuck Republicans,
  10245.  
  10246. 2225
  10247. 01:38:40,616 --> 01:38:42,282
  10248. I guess is the problem
  10249. with that.
  10250.  
  10251. 2226
  10252. 01:38:42,284 --> 01:38:45,686
  10253. Speaking as an American,
  10254. shouldn't you see both sides?
  10255.  
  10256. 2227
  10257. 01:38:45,688 --> 01:38:48,489
  10258. Yeah. I see
  10259. one side's fucking wrong.
  10260.  
  10261. 2228
  10262. 01:38:48,491 --> 01:38:50,991
  10263. What's the problem here?
  10264.  
  10265. 2229
  10266. 01:38:50,993 --> 01:38:52,660
  10267. I'm a Republican.
  10268.  
  10269. 2230
  10270. 01:38:52,662 --> 01:38:54,428
  10271. You're fucking joking
  10272. right now.
  10273.  
  10274. 2231
  10275. 01:38:54,430 --> 01:38:57,631
  10276. Member of the GOP!
  10277. Yeah, you know me.
  10278.  
  10279. 2232
  10280. 01:38:57,633 --> 01:38:58,966
  10281. You're a Republican.
  10282.  
  10283. 2233
  10284. 01:38:58,968 --> 01:38:59,867
  10285. Yeah, I'm a Republican!
  10286.  
  10287. 2234
  10288. 01:38:59,869 --> 01:39:02,336
  10289. The shit has worked out
  10290. so far for me.
  10291.  
  10292. 2235
  10293. 01:39:02,338 --> 01:39:03,904
  10294. What the fuck, man?
  10295.  
  10296. 2236
  10297. 01:39:03,906 --> 01:39:05,439
  10298. All that shit
  10299. you're always saying to me!
  10300.  
  10301. 2237
  10302. 01:39:05,441 --> 01:39:06,640
  10303. - Yeah.
  10304. - Pull yourself up
  10305.  
  10306. 2238
  10307. 01:39:06,642 --> 01:39:09,309
  10308. by your bootstraps. And being
  10309. in charge of your own destiny.
  10310.  
  10311. 2239
  10312. 01:39:09,311 --> 01:39:11,545
  10313. - Republican shit.
  10314. - Oh, and it worked on me.
  10315.  
  10316. 2240
  10317. 01:39:11,547 --> 01:39:13,280
  10318. And it works
  10319. on a lot of people.
  10320.  
  10321. 2241
  10322. 01:39:13,282 --> 01:39:14,448
  10323. Oh, that's fucking sick.
  10324.  
  10325. 2242
  10326. 01:39:14,450 --> 01:39:15,549
  10327. That's right.
  10328.  
  10329. 2243
  10330. 01:39:15,551 --> 01:39:16,917
  10331. Ugh! That's gross!
  10332.  
  10333. 2244
  10334. 01:39:16,919 --> 01:39:18,852
  10335. That Republican shit,
  10336. you put it in my brain
  10337.  
  10338. 2245
  10339. 01:39:18,854 --> 01:39:20,954
  10340. and it made me feel good.
  10341. That's fucked up, man!
  10342.  
  10343. 2246
  10344. 01:39:20,956 --> 01:39:22,423
  10345. Come on. See, this is what
  10346. I'm talking about,
  10347.  
  10348. 2247
  10349. 01:39:22,425 --> 01:39:23,524
  10350. your negative way of thinking.
  10351.  
  10352. 2248
  10353. 01:39:23,526 --> 01:39:24,792
  10354. I don't even know you!
  10355.  
  10356. 2249
  10357. 01:39:24,794 --> 01:39:25,659
  10358. - What do you mean?
  10359. - Ugh!
  10360.  
  10361. 2250
  10362. 01:39:25,661 --> 01:39:27,261
  10363. I'm the same dude
  10364. from two minutes ago.
  10365.  
  10366. 2251
  10367. 01:39:27,263 --> 01:39:28,328
  10368. Your best friend.
  10369.  
  10370. 2252
  10371. 01:39:28,330 --> 01:39:29,563
  10372. Why'd you never tell me this?
  10373.  
  10374. 2253
  10375. 01:39:29,565 --> 01:39:31,699
  10376. 'Cause I knew you'd act exactly
  10377. how you're acting right now.
  10378.  
  10379. 2254
  10380. 01:39:31,701 --> 01:39:33,367
  10381. Wait a minute.
  10382.  
  10383. 2255
  10384. 01:39:33,369 --> 01:39:35,869
  10385. You're always talking about how, like,
  10386. the universe has a plan for all of us...
  10387.  
  10388. 2256
  10389. 01:39:35,871 --> 01:39:36,837
  10390. Take it easy.
  10391.  
  10392. 2257
  10393. 01:39:36,839 --> 01:39:38,772
  10394. There's someone watching
  10395. over us at all times.
  10396.  
  10397. 2258
  10398. 01:39:38,774 --> 01:39:40,741
  10399. - Yeah.
  10400. - Does that mean...
  10401.  
  10402. 2259
  10403. 01:39:40,743 --> 01:39:41,878
  10404. I'm a man of Christian faith.
  10405.  
  10406. 2260
  10407. 01:39:42,478 --> 01:39:44,511
  10408. What the fuck!
  10409.  
  10410. 2261
  10411. 01:39:44,513 --> 01:39:46,014
  10412. Now, come on now!
  10413. We pray for you!
  10414.  
  10415. 2262
  10416. 01:39:46,016 --> 01:39:47,514
  10417. Don't pray for me! Keep it!
  10418.  
  10419. 2263
  10420. 01:39:47,516 --> 01:39:49,583
  10421. - Lord.
  10422. - Oh, stop it. Ignore him, God!
  10423.  
  10424. 2264
  10425. 01:39:49,585 --> 01:39:51,552
  10426. - He doesn't mean that.
  10427. - Don't pray for me!
  10428.  
  10429. 2265
  10430. 01:39:51,554 --> 01:39:52,720
  10431. You are trippin' right now.
  10432.  
  10433. 2266
  10434. 01:39:52,722 --> 01:39:53,787
  10435. I'm not fucking trippin'!
  10436. How could you be Christian?
  10437.  
  10438. 2267
  10439. 01:39:53,789 --> 01:39:58,492
  10440. I wear this cross, every day,
  10441. since you've known me!
  10442.  
  10443. 2268
  10444. 01:39:58,494 --> 01:39:59,660
  10445. What did you think it was for?
  10446.  
  10447. 2269
  10448. 01:39:59,662 --> 01:40:02,063
  10449. I thought it was...
  10450.  
  10451. 2270
  10452. 01:40:02,065 --> 01:40:03,630
  10453. ...a cultural thing.
  10454.  
  10455. 2271
  10456. 01:40:03,632 --> 01:40:05,367
  10457. You mean like,
  10458. 'cause I'm black?
  10459.  
  10460. 2272
  10461. 01:40:06,702 --> 01:40:07,838
  10462. That's what
  10463. I thought, yeah.
  10464.  
  10465. 2273
  10466. 01:40:08,504 --> 01:40:09,570
  10467. That might be.
  10468.  
  10469. 2274
  10470. 01:40:09,572 --> 01:40:11,806
  10471. But that don't mean
  10472. what you said ain't racist.
  10473.  
  10474. 2275
  10475. 01:40:11,808 --> 01:40:13,875
  10476. - You're right.
  10477. - Yeah, I know I'm right!
  10478.  
  10479. 2276
  10480. 01:40:13,877 --> 01:40:15,542
  10481. - Fuck.
  10482. - That's racist as shit!
  10483.  
  10484. 2277
  10485. 01:40:15,544 --> 01:40:16,778
  10486. All right, dude...
  10487.  
  10488. 2278
  10489. 01:40:16,780 --> 01:40:18,645
  10490. I love you, man.
  10491.  
  10492. 2279
  10493. 01:40:18,647 --> 01:40:21,648
  10494. But you're very judgmental.
  10495. They don't want politics
  10496.  
  10497. 2280
  10498. 01:40:21,650 --> 01:40:23,785
  10499. to get into this,
  10500. because you've never really
  10501.  
  10502. 2281
  10503. 01:40:23,787 --> 01:40:25,586
  10504. been good at looking at shit
  10505.  
  10506. 2282
  10507. 01:40:25,588 --> 01:40:27,454
  10508. from other people's
  10509. perspective, Fred.
  10510.  
  10511. 2283
  10512. 01:40:27,456 --> 01:40:28,890
  10513. - I know.
  10514. - It might explain
  10515.  
  10516. 2284
  10517. 01:40:28,892 --> 01:40:31,626
  10518. why you haven't been able to look
  10519. at this through Charlotte's eyes.
  10520.  
  10521. 2285
  10522. 01:40:31,628 --> 01:40:32,694
  10523. I'm sorry.
  10524.  
  10525. 2286
  10526. 01:40:32,696 --> 01:40:34,629
  10527. I'm sorry you couldn't be
  10528. who you are around me,
  10529.  
  10530. 2287
  10531. 01:40:34,631 --> 01:40:37,031
  10532. and you had to
  10533. hide your true self.
  10534.  
  10535. 2288
  10536. 01:40:37,033 --> 01:40:38,365
  10537. That's really fucked up.
  10538.  
  10539. 2289
  10540. 01:40:38,367 --> 01:40:39,433
  10541. That's all right, man.
  10542.  
  10543. 2290
  10544. 01:40:39,435 --> 01:40:43,370
  10545. But my love for the GOP
  10546. and the G-O-D
  10547.  
  10548. 2291
  10549. 01:40:43,372 --> 01:40:45,106
  10550. has nothing to do with us.
  10551.  
  10552. 2292
  10553. 01:40:45,108 --> 01:40:47,041
  10554. I'm racist.
  10555. You're a Republican.
  10556.  
  10557. 2293
  10558. 01:40:47,043 --> 01:40:49,476
  10559. I don't know
  10560. what the fuck's going on.
  10561.  
  10562. 2294
  10563. 01:40:50,847 --> 01:40:53,014
  10564. Polls suggested
  10565. I should get into yoga,
  10566.  
  10567. 2295
  10568. 01:40:53,016 --> 01:40:54,716
  10569. which I did and it turns out,
  10570.  
  10571. 2296
  10572. 01:40:54,718 --> 01:40:56,017
  10573. I don't really like yoga.
  10574.  
  10575. 2297
  10576. 01:40:56,019 --> 01:40:59,487
  10577. Don't you sometimes just wish
  10578. you could say,
  10579.  
  10580. 2298
  10581. 01:40:59,489 --> 01:41:00,688
  10582. "Fuck the polls"?
  10583.  
  10584. 2299
  10585. 01:41:00,690 --> 01:41:05,994
  10586. Well, polls say that people
  10587. find my laugh unattractive.
  10588.  
  10589. 2300
  10590. 01:41:05,996 --> 01:41:07,796
  10591. So I shouldn't laugh
  10592. in public.
  10593.  
  10594. 2301
  10595. 01:41:07,798 --> 01:41:08,930
  10596. That was a bit of a bummer,
  10597.  
  10598. 2302
  10599. 01:41:08,932 --> 01:41:11,432
  10600. because I really,
  10601. I like to laugh.
  10602.  
  10603. 2303
  10604. 01:41:11,434 --> 01:41:12,867
  10605. - A lot.
  10606. - Hmm.
  10607.  
  10608. 2304
  10609. 01:41:12,869 --> 01:41:15,003
  10610. Um, but we came up
  10611. with another laugh
  10612.  
  10613. 2305
  10614. 01:41:15,005 --> 01:41:16,738
  10615. that was better.
  10616. That's more, uh...
  10617.  
  10618. 2306
  10619. 01:41:16,740 --> 01:41:18,573
  10620. - Presidential, I guess.
  10621. - Hmm.
  10622.  
  10623. 2307
  10624. 01:41:20,110 --> 01:41:21,109
  10625. That's good.
  10626.  
  10627. 2308
  10628. 01:41:21,111 --> 01:41:22,744
  10629. It's a lot of teeth
  10630. and not too much sound.
  10631.  
  10632. 2309
  10633. 01:41:22,746 --> 01:41:25,413
  10634. - Yeah.
  10635. - Mmm.
  10636.  
  10637. 2310
  10638. 01:41:25,415 --> 01:41:27,582
  10639. So, um, after dinner,
  10640.  
  10641. 2311
  10642. 01:41:27,584 --> 01:41:29,150
  10643. how about we go
  10644. for a drink somewhere?
  10645.  
  10646. 2312
  10647. 01:41:29,152 --> 01:41:30,418
  10648. Ooh.
  10649.  
  10650. 2313
  10651. 01:41:30,420 --> 01:41:33,588
  10652. I know this great little place
  10653. that's not too far from here.
  10654.  
  10655. 2314
  10656. 01:41:33,590 --> 01:41:35,924
  10657. It's called Mini Bar.
  10658.  
  10659. 2315
  10660. 01:41:35,926 --> 01:41:40,128
  10661. It's quite exclusive, you need
  10662. a little key to access it.
  10663.  
  10664. 2316
  10665. 01:41:40,130 --> 01:41:44,432
  10666. And you get charged
  10667. as you remove the bottle.
  10668.  
  10669. 2317
  10670. 01:41:44,434 --> 01:41:46,034
  10671. - Hmm.
  10672. - It's actually more of
  10673.  
  10674. 2318
  10675. 01:41:46,036 --> 01:41:47,769
  10676. a small fridge than a bar.
  10677.  
  10678. 2319
  10679. 01:41:47,771 --> 01:41:49,637
  10680. - And it's in my room...
  10681. - No, I get it.
  10682.  
  10683. 2320
  10684. 01:41:49,639 --> 01:41:51,072
  10685. I'm inviting you
  10686. back to my room.
  10687.  
  10688. 2321
  10689. 01:41:51,074 --> 01:41:53,743
  10690. I...
  10691.  
  10692. 2322
  10693. 01:41:55,745 --> 01:41:57,812
  10694. - That was my real laugh.
  10695. - Mmm!
  10696.  
  10697. 2323
  10698. 01:41:57,814 --> 01:41:58,947
  10699. I don't know why
  10700.  
  10701. 2324
  10702. 01:41:58,949 --> 01:42:01,351
  10703. they told you
  10704. not to use that laugh.
  10705.  
  10706. 2325
  10707. 01:42:02,752 --> 01:42:03,887
  10708. It's...
  10709.  
  10710. 2326
  10711. 01:42:10,694 --> 01:42:12,594
  10712. Big day tomorrow,
  10713. Madam Secretary.
  10714.  
  10715. 2327
  10716. 01:42:14,965 --> 01:42:16,833
  10717. Yeah. Big day.
  10718.  
  10719. 2328
  10720. 01:42:36,853 --> 01:42:39,156
  10721. Okay. "Hey, it's Fred."
  10722.  
  10723. 2329
  10724. 01:43:02,579 --> 01:43:03,647
  10725. Hello?
  10726.  
  10727. 2330
  10728. 01:43:05,249 --> 01:43:06,849
  10729. Beep.
  10730.  
  10731. 2331
  10732. 01:43:06,851 --> 01:43:09,186
  10733. <i>Oh, uh, guess I got
  10734. your voicemail. Um, hi.</i>
  10735.  
  10736. 2332
  10737. 01:43:10,021 --> 01:43:12,254
  10738. It's Fred.
  10739.  
  10740. 2333
  10741. 01:43:12,256 --> 01:43:15,723
  10742. I guess I wanna start
  10743. by saying I'm really sorry.
  10744.  
  10745. 2334
  10746. 01:43:15,725 --> 01:43:17,826
  10747. You were right
  10748. about everything
  10749.  
  10750. 2335
  10751. 01:43:17,828 --> 01:43:19,931
  10752. and I was wrong
  10753. about everything.
  10754.  
  10755. 2336
  10756. 01:43:21,631 --> 01:43:26,001
  10757. And we should go along
  10758. with the plan.
  10759.  
  10760. 2337
  10761. 01:43:26,003 --> 01:43:29,639
  10762. <i>I can be Marilyn.
  10763. I can be your Marilyn.</i>
  10764.  
  10765. 2338
  10766. 01:43:30,607 --> 01:43:32,107
  10767. I'd rather be
  10768. your Lady Bird,
  10769.  
  10770. 2339
  10771. 01:43:32,109 --> 01:43:35,713
  10772. because, you know,
  10773. LBJ put a ring on that finger.
  10774.  
  10775. 2340
  10776. 01:43:37,647 --> 01:43:41,050
  10777. But I would do anything
  10778. to continue,
  10779.  
  10780. 2341
  10781. 01:43:41,052 --> 01:43:42,753
  10782. to be able to be with you.
  10783.  
  10784. 2342
  10785. 01:43:46,589 --> 01:43:47,758
  10786. Okay, bye.
  10787.  
  10788. 2343
  10789. 01:44:02,106 --> 01:44:03,839
  10790. So, we're losing
  10791. the trees, huh?
  10792.  
  10793. 2344
  10794. 01:44:03,841 --> 01:44:06,775
  10795. Yeah. POTUS talked me
  10796. out of it.
  10797.  
  10798. 2345
  10799. 01:44:06,777 --> 01:44:09,044
  10800. I know that meant
  10801. a lot to you. I'm so sorry.
  10802.  
  10803. 2346
  10804. 01:44:09,046 --> 01:44:10,913
  10805. Hmm, nothing we can do
  10806. about it.
  10807.  
  10808. 2347
  10809. 01:44:10,915 --> 01:44:12,314
  10810. We need his endorsement.
  10811.  
  10812. 2348
  10813. 01:44:12,316 --> 01:44:14,652
  10814. - Yep.
  10815. - Yep.
  10816.  
  10817. 2349
  10818. 01:44:17,321 --> 01:44:19,757
  10819. And I am sorry
  10820. about you and Fred.
  10821.  
  10822. 2350
  10823. 01:44:22,893 --> 01:44:26,061
  10824. You know,
  10825. he called last night.
  10826.  
  10827. 2351
  10828. 01:44:26,063 --> 01:44:28,197
  10829. He said he'd do it,
  10830. he'd go along with the plan.
  10831.  
  10832. 2352
  10833. 01:44:28,199 --> 01:44:31,600
  10834. Really? Wow.
  10835.  
  10836. 2353
  10837. 01:44:31,602 --> 01:44:33,704
  10838. That's a shock.
  10839.  
  10840. 2354
  10841. 01:44:35,139 --> 01:44:38,874
  10842. Um... Okay.
  10843.  
  10844. 2355
  10845. 01:44:38,876 --> 01:44:40,275
  10846. I'll... I'll start
  10847. to make arrangements.
  10848.  
  10849. 2356
  10850. 01:44:40,277 --> 01:44:41,278
  10851. No, Maggie.
  10852.  
  10853. 2357
  10854. 01:44:42,146 --> 01:44:43,746
  10855. There's nothing to do.
  10856.  
  10857. 2358
  10858. 01:44:43,748 --> 01:44:45,716
  10859. At the end of the day,
  10860. it was never gonna work.
  10861.  
  10862. 2359
  10863. 01:44:48,619 --> 01:44:51,787
  10864. Well, today is
  10865. such a good day,
  10866.  
  10867. 2360
  10868. 01:44:51,789 --> 01:44:53,756
  10869. and I am so excited.
  10870.  
  10871. 2361
  10872. 01:44:53,758 --> 01:44:55,224
  10873. We should be psyched.
  10874.  
  10875. 2362
  10876. 01:44:55,226 --> 01:44:57,826
  10877. So psyched.
  10878.  
  10879. 2363
  10880. 01:44:57,828 --> 01:44:59,962
  10881. All right,
  10882. I will see you out there.
  10883.  
  10884. 2364
  10885. 01:44:59,964 --> 01:45:01,032
  10886. All right.
  10887.  
  10888. 2365
  10889. 01:45:20,218 --> 01:45:21,585
  10890. Hey, man.
  10891.  
  10892. 2366
  10893. 01:45:22,254 --> 01:45:23,321
  10894. Can I get a beer?
  10895.  
  10896. 2367
  10897. 01:45:24,922 --> 01:45:28,090
  10898. - Thanks for coming.
  10899. - No problem, bro.
  10900.  
  10901. 2368
  10902. 01:45:28,092 --> 01:45:30,726
  10903. How you feelin' though?
  10904.  
  10905. 2369
  10906. 01:45:30,728 --> 01:45:32,761
  10907. Okay, you know,
  10908. you were right.
  10909.  
  10910. 2370
  10911. 01:45:32,763 --> 01:45:33,962
  10912. I called her.
  10913.  
  10914. 2371
  10915. 01:45:33,964 --> 01:45:35,798
  10916. I left a message.
  10917. She didn't call me back.
  10918.  
  10919. 2372
  10920. 01:45:35,800 --> 01:45:37,833
  10921. So... Whatever.
  10922.  
  10923. 2373
  10924. 01:45:37,835 --> 01:45:39,171
  10925. Sure you wanna watch this?
  10926.  
  10927. 2374
  10928. 01:45:40,138 --> 01:45:41,572
  10929. Yeah, I have to.
  10930.  
  10931. 2375
  10932. 01:45:43,841 --> 01:45:46,409
  10933. Madam Secretary,
  10934. I'd like to introduce you
  10935.  
  10936. 2376
  10937. 01:45:46,411 --> 01:45:47,343
  10938. to Lil Yachty.
  10939.  
  10940. 2377
  10941. 01:45:47,345 --> 01:45:49,245
  10942. He's going to be
  10943. performing after the speech.
  10944.  
  10945. 2378
  10946. 01:45:49,247 --> 01:45:50,779
  10947. Pleasure to meet you,
  10948. Mr. Yachty.
  10949.  
  10950. 2379
  10951. 01:45:50,781 --> 01:45:53,116
  10952. I'm a big-ass fan. I'm so
  10953. excited to vote for you.
  10954.  
  10955. 2380
  10956. 01:45:53,118 --> 01:45:55,187
  10957. - I'm sorry, it's game time.
  10958. - Okay.
  10959.  
  10960. 2381
  10961. 01:46:13,238 --> 01:46:14,938
  10962. <i>Good morning!</i>
  10963.  
  10964. 2382
  10965. 01:46:14,940 --> 01:46:17,909
  10966. <i>Thank you, everyone,
  10967. for being here with me today.</i>
  10968.  
  10969. 2383
  10970. 01:46:19,177 --> 01:46:20,776
  10971. <i>Let me start
  10972. by saying something</i>
  10973.  
  10974. 2384
  10975. 01:46:20,778 --> 01:46:23,146
  10976. <i>I haven't said since I was 16</i>
  10977.  
  10978. 2385
  10979. 01:46:23,148 --> 01:46:25,215
  10980. <i>and worked
  10981. at Blockbuster Video.</i>
  10982.  
  10983. 2386
  10984. 01:46:27,452 --> 01:46:28,750
  10985. <i>I quit...</i>
  10986.  
  10987. 2387
  10988. 01:46:28,752 --> 01:46:30,887
  10989. I helped write that joke.
  10990.  
  10991. 2388
  10992. 01:46:30,889 --> 01:46:32,088
  10993. Oh, yeah?
  10994. That's a good joke.
  10995.  
  10996. 2389
  10997. 01:46:32,090 --> 01:46:34,190
  10998. <i>...as secretary of state,</i>
  10999.  
  11000. 2390
  11001. 01:46:34,192 --> 01:46:35,825
  11002. <i>in order to run</i>
  11003.  
  11004. 2391
  11005. 01:46:35,827 --> 01:46:38,995
  11006. <i>for president of
  11007. the United States of America.</i>
  11008.  
  11009. 2392
  11010. 01:46:42,200 --> 01:46:44,136
  11011. God bless.
  11012.  
  11013. 2393
  11014. 01:46:46,972 --> 01:46:49,472
  11015. <i>And I'm honored</i>
  11016.  
  11017. 2394
  11018. 01:46:49,474 --> 01:46:53,209
  11019. <i>to have the full support
  11020. of President Chambers,</i>
  11021.  
  11022. 2395
  11023. 01:46:53,211 --> 01:46:55,912
  11024. <i>a man I greatly admire.</i>
  11025.  
  11026. 2396
  11027. 01:46:55,914 --> 01:46:59,282
  11028. <i>A man who is
  11029. an extraordinary leader.</i>
  11030.  
  11031. 2397
  11032. 01:46:59,284 --> 01:47:01,153
  11033. Man, you know
  11034. who you should date?
  11035.  
  11036. 2398
  11037. 01:47:02,354 --> 01:47:03,889
  11038. Taylor Swift.
  11039.  
  11040. 2399
  11041. 01:47:05,056 --> 01:47:07,056
  11042. Hell, yeah.
  11043. I could see that.
  11044.  
  11045. 2400
  11046. 01:47:07,058 --> 01:47:10,994
  11047. Why... Why do you think
  11048. I could date Taylor Swift?
  11049.  
  11050. 2401
  11051. 01:47:10,996 --> 01:47:12,795
  11052. Fred, you were dating
  11053. Charlotte Field.
  11054.  
  11055. 2402
  11056. 01:47:12,797 --> 01:47:14,297
  11057. That's the most powerful woman
  11058. on Earth!
  11059.  
  11060. 2403
  11061. 01:47:14,299 --> 01:47:15,832
  11062. Oh, I get it.
  11063.  
  11064. 2404
  11065. 01:47:15,834 --> 01:47:17,936
  11066. I don't know what me and
  11067. Taylor Swift have in common.
  11068.  
  11069. 2405
  11070. 01:47:19,171 --> 01:47:23,106
  11071. Y'all white. Ya ain't got
  11072. a care in the world.
  11073.  
  11074. 2406
  11075. 01:47:23,108 --> 01:47:24,340
  11076. That's true.
  11077.  
  11078. 2407
  11079. 01:47:24,342 --> 01:47:26,311
  11080. <i>But this campaign
  11081. is not about me.</i>
  11082.  
  11083. 2408
  11084. 01:47:27,012 --> 01:47:28,845
  11085. <i>It's about you.</i>
  11086.  
  11087. 2409
  11088. 01:47:28,847 --> 01:47:30,079
  11089. <i>It's about us.</i>
  11090.  
  11091. 2410
  11092. 01:47:31,283 --> 01:47:32,882
  11093. <i>It's about how together,</i>
  11094.  
  11095. 2411
  11096. 01:47:32,884 --> 01:47:36,953
  11097. <i>we can build the future
  11098. our fellow Americans deserve.</i>
  11099.  
  11100. 2412
  11101. 01:47:40,058 --> 01:47:43,026
  11102. <i>I have dreamt
  11103. about this moment</i>
  11104.  
  11105. 2413
  11106. 01:47:43,028 --> 01:47:45,261
  11107. <i>ever since
  11108. I was a little girl</i>
  11109.  
  11110. 2414
  11111. 01:47:45,263 --> 01:47:47,365
  11112. <i>growing up
  11113. in the nation's capital.</i>
  11114.  
  11115. 2415
  11116. 01:47:50,001 --> 01:47:53,537
  11117. <i>And I know
  11118. that if that young girl</i>
  11119.  
  11120. 2416
  11121. 01:47:53,539 --> 01:47:57,008
  11122. <i>could see me
  11123. standing up here right now...</i>
  11124.  
  11125. 2417
  11126. 01:48:02,314 --> 01:48:04,983
  11127. <i>She would be so...</i>
  11128.  
  11129. 2418
  11130. 01:48:08,220 --> 01:48:09,921
  11131. <i>She would be...</i>
  11132.  
  11133. 2419
  11134. 01:48:16,362 --> 01:48:17,496
  11135. What's happening?
  11136.  
  11137. 2420
  11138. 01:48:19,097 --> 01:48:22,734
  11139. <i>She... She would be so
  11140. disappointed in me, actually.</i>
  11141.  
  11142. 2421
  11143. 01:48:24,437 --> 01:48:27,971
  11144. <i>Yeah, the truth is, that girl</i>
  11145.  
  11146. 2422
  11147. 01:48:27,973 --> 01:48:29,172
  11148. <i>would want me to be honest</i>
  11149.  
  11150. 2423
  11151. 01:48:29,174 --> 01:48:31,841
  11152. <i>and have integrity and not be</i>
  11153.  
  11154. 2424
  11155. 01:48:31,843 --> 01:48:35,248
  11156. <i>blackmailed by evil people
  11157. with evil agendas.</i>
  11158.  
  11159. 2425
  11160. 01:48:37,483 --> 01:48:39,316
  11161. <i>So instead, I'm just gonna...</i>
  11162.  
  11163. 2426
  11164. 01:48:39,318 --> 01:48:42,453
  11165. <i>I'm just gonna tell the truth,
  11166. and whatever happens, happens.</i>
  11167.  
  11168. 2427
  11169. 01:48:42,455 --> 01:48:44,421
  11170. <i>So here we go.</i>
  11171.  
  11172. 2428
  11173. 01:48:44,423 --> 01:48:48,091
  11174. <i>Parker Wembley
  11175. and our dumb-fuck president...</i>
  11176.  
  11177. 2429
  11178. 01:48:48,093 --> 01:48:49,393
  11179. Whoo!
  11180.  
  11181. 2430
  11182. 01:48:49,395 --> 01:48:50,594
  11183. <i>...are doing some
  11184. evil shit together.</i>
  11185.  
  11186. 2431
  11187. 01:48:50,596 --> 01:48:52,329
  11188. <i>And because
  11189. I just told you now,</i>
  11190.  
  11191. 2432
  11192. 01:48:52,331 --> 01:48:55,932
  11193. <i>they're going to release
  11194. a video of a guy I dated</i>
  11195.  
  11196. 2433
  11197. 01:48:55,934 --> 01:48:58,269
  11198. <i>jerking off all over himself.</i>
  11199.  
  11200. 2434
  11201. 01:48:58,271 --> 01:48:59,270
  11202. Release the video.
  11203.  
  11204. 2435
  11205. 01:48:59,272 --> 01:49:01,338
  11206. Get the fucking thing online.
  11207. Get it online!
  11208.  
  11209. 2436
  11210. 01:49:01,340 --> 01:49:03,842
  11211. <i>But don't slut shame me. I...</i>
  11212.  
  11213. 2437
  11214. 01:49:05,144 --> 01:49:06,212
  11215. <i>I like him.</i>
  11216.  
  11217. 2438
  11218. 01:49:06,945 --> 01:49:08,512
  11219. <i>I like him a lot.</i>
  11220.  
  11221. 2439
  11222. 01:49:08,514 --> 01:49:10,516
  11223. Fred, you gotta go to her.
  11224.  
  11225. 2440
  11226. 01:49:12,618 --> 01:49:14,884
  11227. Go get her ass, man.
  11228.  
  11229. 2441
  11230. 01:49:14,886 --> 01:49:16,222
  11231. <i>And he jerks off.</i>
  11232.  
  11233. 2442
  11234. 01:49:18,557 --> 01:49:20,624
  11235. <i>And so do all of you.</i>
  11236.  
  11237. 2443
  11238. 01:49:20,626 --> 01:49:21,891
  11239. Hell, yeah!
  11240.  
  11241. 2444
  11242. 01:49:21,893 --> 01:49:24,094
  11243. <i>So deal with it.</i>
  11244.  
  11245. 2445
  11246. 01:49:24,096 --> 01:49:25,564
  11247. <i>Deal with it, America.</i>
  11248.  
  11249. 2446
  11250. 01:49:34,507 --> 01:49:36,540
  11251. Hey! I'm Fred!
  11252.  
  11253. 2447
  11254. 01:49:36,542 --> 01:49:38,208
  11255. Is that an XL?
  11256.  
  11257. 2448
  11258. 01:49:38,210 --> 01:49:39,476
  11259. I've got five stars in it,
  11260.  
  11261. 2449
  11262. 01:49:39,478 --> 01:49:40,978
  11263. if you could speed
  11264. this shit up, man!
  11265.  
  11266. 2450
  11267. 01:49:40,980 --> 01:49:42,313
  11268. We'll give you extra tip,
  11269. real tip.
  11270.  
  11271. 2451
  11272. 01:49:42,315 --> 01:49:43,647
  11273. Not Uber tip! Cash tip!
  11274.  
  11275. 2452
  11276. 01:49:43,649 --> 01:49:46,018
  11277. Get back! Get back!
  11278.  
  11279. 2453
  11280. 01:49:49,088 --> 01:49:51,190
  11281. - Where are we going?
  11282. - I don't know.
  11283.  
  11284. 2454
  11285. 01:49:55,127 --> 01:49:56,393
  11286. She's leaving?
  11287. Where is she going?
  11288.  
  11289. 2455
  11290. 01:49:56,395 --> 01:49:58,195
  11291. Shit, I don't know.
  11292. This isn't on the itinerary.
  11293.  
  11294. 2456
  11295. 01:49:58,197 --> 01:50:00,364
  11296. Tom, you have to think past
  11297. the itinerary!
  11298.  
  11299. 2457
  11300. 01:50:00,366 --> 01:50:01,298
  11301. I can't.
  11302.  
  11303. 2458
  11304. 01:50:01,300 --> 01:50:03,133
  11305. Fred, I just got
  11306. a Wembley news alert
  11307.  
  11308. 2459
  11309. 01:50:03,135 --> 01:50:05,336
  11310. - with your name on it.
  11311. - Don't open it!
  11312.  
  11313. 2460
  11314. 01:50:05,338 --> 01:50:08,038
  11315. <i>Oh, yeah! Oh, boy!</i>
  11316.  
  11317. 2461
  11318. 01:50:08,040 --> 01:50:09,440
  11319. Oh, Fred!
  11320.  
  11321. 2462
  11322. 01:50:09,442 --> 01:50:12,443
  11323. Oh, no. Oh, no.
  11324.  
  11325. 2463
  11326. 01:50:12,445 --> 01:50:13,644
  11327. Hey, it's all right, man.
  11328.  
  11329. 2464
  11330. 01:50:13,646 --> 01:50:15,312
  11331. You know,
  11332. we all got our things.
  11333.  
  11334. 2465
  11335. 01:50:15,314 --> 01:50:17,014
  11336. I don't bust a nut
  11337. on my face.
  11338.  
  11339. 2466
  11340. 01:50:17,016 --> 01:50:19,216
  11341. - But, like...
  11342. - It's not like a thing I do!
  11343.  
  11344. 2467
  11345. 01:50:20,386 --> 01:50:22,219
  11346. Do you think that'll,
  11347. like, go viral?
  11348.  
  11349. 2468
  11350. 01:50:22,221 --> 01:50:25,057
  11351. This is the news!
  11352.  
  11353. 2469
  11354. 01:50:25,659 --> 01:50:27,326
  11355. Oh, shit.
  11356.  
  11357. 2470
  11358. 01:50:35,267 --> 01:50:38,502
  11359. Excuse me. Move, damn it!
  11360. This man is in love.
  11361.  
  11362. 2471
  11363. 01:50:38,504 --> 01:50:40,371
  11364. <i>Secretary Field
  11365. just drove away,</i>
  11366.  
  11367. 2472
  11368. 01:50:40,373 --> 01:50:42,439
  11369. <i>no comment
  11370. as to her destination.</i>
  11371.  
  11372. 2473
  11373. 01:50:42,441 --> 01:50:44,576
  11374. <i>We're gonna keep tracking
  11375. this story for you...</i>
  11376.  
  11377. 2474
  11378. 01:50:44,578 --> 01:50:46,410
  11379. <i>Yo, check it out.
  11380. It's the come-guy!</i>
  11381.  
  11382. 2475
  11383. 01:50:46,412 --> 01:50:48,112
  11384. - <i>Yeah, that's him!</i>
  11385. - <i>Oh, sir,</i>
  11386.  
  11387. 2476
  11388. 01:50:48,114 --> 01:50:49,313
  11389. <i>just a couple of questions.
  11390. We're live right now.</i>
  11391.  
  11392. 2477
  11393. 01:50:49,315 --> 01:50:52,449
  11394. <i>No! I'm come-guy?</i>
  11395.  
  11396. 2478
  11397. 01:50:52,451 --> 01:50:54,151
  11398. No comments at this time,
  11399. thank you! Thank you!
  11400.  
  11401. 2479
  11402. 01:50:54,153 --> 01:50:55,285
  11403. Thank you!
  11404.  
  11405. 2480
  11406. 01:50:55,287 --> 01:50:57,390
  11407. Do not touch him!
  11408. Do not touch him!
  11409.  
  11410. 2481
  11411. 01:51:12,138 --> 01:51:13,205
  11412. Hi.
  11413.  
  11414. 2482
  11415. 01:51:14,206 --> 01:51:15,374
  11416. Holy shit.
  11417.  
  11418. 2483
  11419. 01:51:17,477 --> 01:51:19,011
  11420. Did you see my speech?
  11421.  
  11422. 2484
  11423. 01:51:20,246 --> 01:51:22,982
  11424. Yeah. I think
  11425. everyone saw it.
  11426.  
  11427. 2485
  11428. 01:51:23,450 --> 01:51:24,451
  11429. Yeah.
  11430.  
  11431. 2486
  11432. 01:51:27,253 --> 01:51:29,188
  11433. You know,
  11434. your video's out there.
  11435.  
  11436. 2487
  11437. 01:51:30,089 --> 01:51:31,591
  11438. Yeah, I caught that.
  11439.  
  11440. 2488
  11441. 01:51:38,598 --> 01:51:40,567
  11442. Here's the deal.
  11443. I love you.
  11444.  
  11445. 2489
  11446. 01:51:42,335 --> 01:51:44,436
  11447. I know I do.
  11448.  
  11449. 2490
  11450. 01:51:44,438 --> 01:51:47,407
  11451. Because I've never been
  11452. so scared in my entire life.
  11453.  
  11454. 2491
  11455. 01:51:50,377 --> 01:51:55,080
  11456. And I once shared an elevator
  11457. with Saddam Hussein.
  11458.  
  11459. 2492
  11460. 01:51:56,416 --> 01:51:58,585
  11461. Just me and Saddam.
  11462.  
  11463. 2493
  11464. 01:52:01,655 --> 01:52:03,523
  11465. And this is way scarier.
  11466.  
  11467. 2494
  11468. 01:52:06,460 --> 01:52:07,993
  11469. I love you.
  11470.  
  11471. 2495
  11472. 01:52:11,131 --> 01:52:13,598
  11473. Okay, you're really gonna have
  11474. to say something right now.
  11475.  
  11476. 2496
  11477. 01:52:13,600 --> 01:52:15,202
  11478. 'Cause I'm freaking out.
  11479.  
  11480. 2497
  11481. 01:52:18,070 --> 01:52:20,340
  11482. I've been in love with you
  11483. since I was 12 years old.
  11484.  
  11485. 2498
  11486. 01:52:41,461 --> 01:52:42,462
  11487. Oh.
  11488.  
  11489. 2499
  11490. 01:52:44,164 --> 01:52:45,230
  11491. Hello?
  11492.  
  11493. 2500
  11494. 01:52:45,232 --> 01:52:48,299
  11495. Hey, Fred, uh, there's
  11496. a million people out here
  11497.  
  11498. 2501
  11499. 01:52:48,301 --> 01:52:50,702
  11500. and they want to talk to the
  11501. candidate and the come-guy.
  11502.  
  11503. 2502
  11504. 01:52:50,704 --> 01:52:52,539
  11505. So, I figured they'd hit you.
  11506.  
  11507. 2503
  11508. 01:53:13,426 --> 01:53:14,761
  11509. Fred!
  11510.  
  11511. 2504
  11512. 01:53:15,729 --> 01:53:17,264
  11513. Fred!
  11514.  
  11515. 2505
  11516. 01:53:22,569 --> 01:53:25,503
  11517. A crazy day.
  11518.  
  11519. 2506
  11520. 01:53:25,505 --> 01:53:27,740
  11521. But I'm really glad
  11522. you're all here.
  11523.  
  11524. 2507
  11525. 01:53:27,742 --> 01:53:29,810
  11526. I'd like to introduce you
  11527. to someone.
  11528.  
  11529. 2508
  11530. 01:53:31,177 --> 01:53:32,245
  11531. This is Fred.
  11532.  
  11533. 2509
  11534. 01:53:32,880 --> 01:53:34,147
  11535. Hi, there.
  11536.  
  11537. 2510
  11538. 01:53:35,750 --> 01:53:37,750
  11539. My boyfriend.
  11540.  
  11541. 2511
  11542. 01:53:37,752 --> 01:53:39,119
  11543. Whoo!
  11544.  
  11545. 2512
  11546. 01:53:42,422 --> 01:53:44,355
  11547. You kind of
  11548. know him already,
  11549.  
  11550. 2513
  11551. 01:53:44,357 --> 01:53:46,457
  11552. but you'll get to
  11553. know him a lot more
  11554.  
  11555. 2514
  11556. 01:53:46,459 --> 01:53:47,762
  11557. in the next few months...
  11558.  
  11559. 2515
  11560. 01:53:48,963 --> 01:53:51,596
  11561. 'Cause he's gonna be right by
  11562. my side on my campaign trail.
  11563.  
  11564. 2516
  11565. 01:54:02,242 --> 01:54:04,110
  11566. Wakanda Forever!
  11567.  
  11568. 2517
  11569. 01:54:12,319 --> 01:54:14,587
  11570. Charlotte! Charlotte!
  11571.  
  11572. 2518
  11573. 01:54:14,589 --> 01:54:17,190
  11574. Charlotte! Charlotte!
  11575.  
  11576. 2519
  11577. 01:54:18,358 --> 01:54:19,825
  11578. I started the chant!
  11579.  
  11580. 2520
  11581. 01:54:19,827 --> 01:54:21,762
  11582. I started that chant!
  11583.  
  11584. 2521
  11585. 01:54:25,499 --> 01:54:27,198
  11586. <i>...that I will
  11587. faithfully execute</i>
  11588.  
  11589. 2522
  11590. 01:54:27,200 --> 01:54:30,436
  11591. <i>the office of the president
  11592. of the United States.</i>
  11593.  
  11594. 2523
  11595. 01:54:30,438 --> 01:54:31,804
  11596. <i>What a momentous day,</i>
  11597.  
  11598. 2524
  11599. 01:54:31,806 --> 01:54:33,304
  11600. <i>our first female president.</i>
  11601.  
  11602. 2525
  11603. 01:54:33,306 --> 01:54:35,239
  11604. <i>I never thought I'd see it.</i>
  11605.  
  11606. 2526
  11607. 01:54:35,241 --> 01:54:36,942
  11608. <i>Well, I mean, a lot of people
  11609. are gonna say</i>
  11610.  
  11611. 2527
  11612. 01:54:36,944 --> 01:54:38,944
  11613. <i>this is a historic moment
  11614. for women everywhere,</i>
  11615.  
  11616. 2528
  11617. 01:54:38,946 --> 01:54:41,212
  11618. <i>but do we really want
  11619. her finger on the button</i>
  11620.  
  11621. 2529
  11622. 01:54:41,214 --> 01:54:42,548
  11623. <i>when it's that time
  11624. of the month?</i>
  11625.  
  11626. 2530
  11627. 01:54:42,550 --> 01:54:44,416
  11628. <i>I wouldn't want
  11629. my wife making any decision</i>
  11630.  
  11631. 2531
  11632. 01:54:44,418 --> 01:54:45,751
  11633. <i>during that time
  11634. of the month.</i>
  11635.  
  11636. 2532
  11637. 01:54:45,753 --> 01:54:47,586
  11638. <i>You know what?
  11639. Fuck you guys. I quit.</i>
  11640.  
  11641. 2533
  11642. 01:54:47,588 --> 01:54:49,187
  11643. <i>Looks like it's someone's
  11644. time of the month.</i>
  11645.  
  11646. 2534
  11647. 01:54:49,189 --> 01:54:50,723
  11648. - <i>Oh!</i>
  11649. - <i>Looks like Aunt Flow</i>
  11650.  
  11651. 2535
  11652. 01:54:50,725 --> 01:54:52,591
  11653. <i>is going to work down at
  11654. the Red River Casino... Oh!</i>
  11655.  
  11656. 2536
  11657. 01:54:52,593 --> 01:54:53,826
  11658. Jesus Christ!
  11659. Quick, quick, cut!
  11660.  
  11661. 2537
  11662. 01:54:53,828 --> 01:54:58,196
  11663. Hi! I'm the First Mister of
  11664. the United States of America.
  11665.  
  11666. 2538
  11667. 01:54:58,198 --> 01:54:59,665
  11668. My name is Fred Field.
  11669.  
  11670. 2539
  11671. 01:54:59,667 --> 01:55:00,833
  11672. I took my wife's last name.
  11673.  
  11674. 2540
  11675. 01:55:00,835 --> 01:55:04,903
  11676. And, uh, I'm gonna give you
  11677. a tour of the White House.
  11678.  
  11679. 2541
  11680. 01:55:04,905 --> 01:55:07,873
  11681. We're starting with the
  11682. portraits of the first spouses.
  11683.  
  11684. 2542
  11685. 01:55:07,875 --> 01:55:09,742
  11686. Here we have
  11687. Mamie Eisenhower.
  11688.  
  11689. 2543
  11690. 01:55:09,744 --> 01:55:10,809
  11691. Jackie Kennedy.
  11692.  
  11693. 2544
  11694. 01:55:10,811 --> 01:55:13,646
  11695. We have the beautiful
  11696. Lady Bird Johnson's portrait.
  11697.  
  11698. 2545
  11699. 01:55:13,648 --> 01:55:16,382
  11700. And that leads us
  11701. into my portrait.
  11702.  
  11703. 2546
  11704. 01:55:16,384 --> 01:55:18,651
  11705. It was painted by
  11706. Todd McFarlane,
  11707.  
  11708. 2547
  11709. 01:55:18,653 --> 01:55:21,220
  11710. who created the Spawn comics,
  11711. of course.
  11712.  
  11713. 2548
  11714. 01:55:21,222 --> 01:55:22,890
  11715. <i>The first versions
  11716. were a little over the top.</i>
  11717.  
  11718. 2549
  11719. 01:55:24,625 --> 01:55:26,692
  11720. Hi, guys.
  11721.  
  11722. 2550
  11723. 01:55:26,694 --> 01:55:28,560
  11724. <i>I used to think the best
  11725. way for me to change the world,</i>
  11726.  
  11727. 2551
  11728. 01:55:28,562 --> 01:55:30,462
  11729. to make it a better place
  11730. was through journalism.
  11731.  
  11732. 2552
  11733. 01:55:30,464 --> 01:55:31,930
  11734. Then I realized
  11735. that's not at all the case.
  11736.  
  11737. 2553
  11738. 01:55:31,932 --> 01:55:35,534
  11739. Really, the best thing I could
  11740. be doing for the world
  11741.  
  11742. 2554
  11743. 01:55:35,536 --> 01:55:38,537
  11744. is just supporting
  11745. this amazing person
  11746.  
  11747. 2555
  11748. 01:55:38,539 --> 01:55:40,339
  11749. and just trying to
  11750. learn from her
  11751.  
  11752. 2556
  11753. 01:55:40,341 --> 01:55:41,874
  11754. and kinda just trying to be
  11755.  
  11756. 2557
  11757. 01:55:41,876 --> 01:55:44,410
  11758. the best first mister
  11759. I can be.
  11760.  
  11761. 2558
  11762. 01:55:44,412 --> 01:55:46,979
  11763. I actually got a tattoo
  11764. of the first mister insignia.
  11765.  
  11766. 2559
  11767. 01:55:46,981 --> 01:55:49,782
  11768. - He did.
  11769. - There we are.
  11770.  
  11771. 2560
  11772. 01:55:49,784 --> 01:55:50,949
  11773. You're wearing mittens.
  11774.  
  11775. 2561
  11776. 01:55:50,951 --> 01:55:52,351
  11777. Got little mittens on.
  11778.  
  11779. 2562
  11780. 01:55:52,353 --> 01:55:54,853
  11781. If you think of where this tattoo
  11782. started to where it ended up.
  11783.  
  11784. 2563
  11785. 01:55:54,855 --> 01:55:56,789
  11786. It really has
  11787. an amazing arc to it.
  11788.  
  11789. 2564
  11790. 01:55:56,791 --> 01:55:59,725
  11791. What are some of
  11792. the perks of your new roles?
  11793.  
  11794. 2565
  11795. 01:55:59,727 --> 01:56:03,029
  11796. Well, I finally get to enact
  11797. my vision for America.
  11798.  
  11799. 2566
  11800. 01:56:03,031 --> 01:56:05,264
  11801. I finally got to find out
  11802. who killed Kennedy.
  11803.  
  11804. 2567
  11805. 01:56:05,266 --> 01:56:06,498
  11806. - Oh, my God. Don't you dare.
  11807. - I won't say.
  11808.  
  11809. 2568
  11810. 01:56:06,500 --> 01:56:07,666
  11811. - Don't.
  11812. - I won't say.
  11813.  
  11814. 2569
  11815. 01:56:07,668 --> 01:56:08,767
  11816. Fred, I'm not
  11817. kidding around.
  11818.  
  11819. 2570
  11820. 01:56:08,769 --> 01:56:09,835
  11821. It's not who you think!
  11822.  
  11823. 2571
  11824. 01:56:09,837 --> 01:56:11,370
  11825. Don't do it.
  11826.  
  11827. 2572
  11828. 01:56:11,372 --> 01:56:12,440
  11829. It's pretty surprising.
  11830.  
  11831. 2573
  11832. 01:56:13,374 --> 01:56:14,873
  11833. He's my Mister.
  11834.  
  11835. 2574
  11836. 01:56:14,875 --> 01:56:17,511
  11837. I'm her Mister.
  11838. And she's my president.
  11839.  
  11840. 2575
  11841. 01:56:20,549 --> 01:56:25,549
  11842. Subtitles by explosiveskull
  11843. www.OpenSubtitles.org
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