Responds to !hack with https://docs.google.com/document/d/19HlYmLaY4a-_0xSrkyIFl5NjzC8HDAs6xOvL_PxUPQg/edit.	 |
Responds to !"meme" with Nkenna's micropenis, enlarged so we can actually see it..	 |
Responds to !ig with User: Historthive2021 // Pass: MITMITMIT.	 |
Responds to !update with http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/what-my-chances/1957085-chance-me.html#latest.	 |
Responds to !flor with http://www.lolpix.com/pictures/2016_1/No_Matter_How_Fast_I_Run.jpg.	 |
Responds to !nut with http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/209/821/655.gif.	 |
Responds to !dead with http://images.roadtrafficsigns.com/img/lg2/X/x-w14-1-2.jpg.	 |
Responds to !initiation with http://imgur.com/a/QNvle.	 |
Responds to !histort with https://i.ytimg.com/vi/FR6qjnjwpXs/maxresdefault.jpg.	 |
Responds to !oppressed with https://media.giphy.com/media/WoXq3IHLd9BsY/giphy.gif.	 |
Responds to !triggered with http://imgur.com/gallery/rTWDmuc.	 |
Responds to !roasted with http://imgur.com/a/F4Ewp.	 |
Responds to !soap with Visit antoinettesbathhouse.com and enter the code MIT2021 for 20 percent off your order! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgv7U3GYlDY.	 |
Responds to !rip with http://media.breitbart.com/media/2016/10/sad-pepe-640x480.jpg.	 |
Responds to !startup with https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/0BzfM6vFrxYZ1dGNxdFhuYWctMFE.	 |
Responds to !topic with NSFSSK (Not Safe For State School Kids) DO NOT LOOK AT THE GALLERY MIT CLASS OF 2021.	 |
Responds to !help with I am BOT #0003. I am useless. !topic, !rip, !startup, !soap, !roasted, !triggered, !histort, !initiation, !dead, !nut, !flor, !update, !ig, !oppressed, !paste, !wrong, !schools, !"meme", !hack, !Irenenation, !finnish, !fail, !caltech.	 |
Responds to !wrong with https://media.giphy.com/media/3oz8xLd9DJq2l2VFtu/giphy.gif.	 |
Responds to !schools with Stanford = An Asylum; Princeton = Pre K; Cornell = Suicide Pit; Upenn = UPenis; Dartmouth = school of daddy's money and toxic masculinity; Yale = """law""" "school"; Brown = skid mark; GA Tech = red neck sausage fest; UChicago = university of CHIRAQ; Duke = Dookie.	 |
Responds to !irenenation with So young padawan, if that is even your real identity. In light of the current events which have befallen this chat, we have entered upon a state of high security. This has made vetting a necessary security measure, and as a new member, you will be regarded as a filthy Caltech admit until proven innocent. In order to prove your innocence, you must provide for us a few simple facts and favors. Failure to do so within a reasonable length of time will force your immediate expulsion from this chat. 1. Where are you from? Answer this question in adequate detail. 2. Comment under the groupme post on fb "MIT > cALtECH". This task is case-sensitive. Do not diverge from these instructions..	 |
Responds to !finnish with https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wnE4vF9CQ4.	 |
Responds to gort status with fuck you.	 |
Responds to !fail with caltech.edu.	 |
Responds to !caltech with When cALtECH sends its people, they’re not sending their best. They’re not sending you. They’re sending people that have lots of problems, and they’re bringing those problems with us. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people..