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Life, and stuff:
I'm 14 years old, and in Canada in grade 9. my brother has a mental disability and is in a special needs class at the same high school as me. he is 2 and a half years older than me. i hate his guts. he screams and has disneyland ride youtube footage on at full blast and watches the same 5sec part of a vid thousands of times. Hes been doing this for years. Honestly I hate him. hes 17 and still shits his pants because my parents just clean him up anyways. i didnt use the toilet to take a shit until grade 1 or when i was 6 because i used to follow his example because i didnt know he was a sped. whatever though, its good.
i hate my friends though. i've told them when they see him in school to not associate him with me and to just not mention him. they are fucked though. they always make jokes about me having sex with him. its so fucking annoying. i've put up with it by countering and saying shit like "no i actually fuck my sister" (i do not have a sister.) today something troubled me though. I was eating lunch with another group of friends, people who commonly got bullied. (i hang out with everyone as long as they arent an asshole) and my friends whom i mentioned earlier call me over and say that i would find this "meme" really funny. they took pictures of my brother and zoomed in on his face and made fun of him. they did this to another boy who had down syndrome too whom i actually spoke to in the halls and hes a really nice kid. i just told them "you're so meeean" and then left, trying to laugh it off. This got to me though. i still hate my brothers guts but what the fuck did he do to these people. why the fuck are they making fun of him. i hate it. i dont want to do anything like beat them up or shit but if they push it i might go for one of them to send a message.

why him


anyways, i just felt like it would be nice to write it down to try and help me feel better. if any of you read this and have friends who have siblings with severe mental disabilities try not to bring jt up with them. its a hard thing to live with.

if you read this then thank you