"You, uh, done Revy?"

The now rotund gunslinger screamed in incoherent rage, rocking back and forth on her stomach as her stumpy, conical arms and legs wiggled impotently.

"GODDAMN FUCKING FUCK ROCK, YOU SHIT-EATING SONUVABITCH!" She snarled, baring her fangs, which was more difficult with her puffy, deep blue cheeks. "YOU DID THIS ON FUCKING PURPOSE, DIDN'T YOU?"

Rock sighed, walking around his berrified coworker while drawing a cigarette from his pocket. "I told you that beer could have side-effects, but you drank it anyways." He placed it in his mouth and lit it with a lighter.

"Well I wasn't fucking expecting anything like this! Would it kill ya to be more fucking specific?" Her enormous breasts jiggled in her rage, straining her already overstretched tanktop. "And why the hell'd you even buy that bullshit anyways; you get your rocks off on me turning into a piece of fucking fruit?"

Rock turned away, blowing a puff of smoke.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Rock, that's why you did it? Fucking pathetic."

Rock sighed again, a light blush on his cheeks. "I didn't really think it'd work, if that makes you feel any better."

"Fuck you, Rock. You're not the one who feels like a beached whale cuz of you being a sick fuck." Juice began to dribble out from Revy's nipples, staining her tank. "And now I'm lactating juice, huh; of fucking course."

Rock took another drag, wrapping an arm around her head and patting what used to be her shoulder. "That's it Revy, get it all out. We'll have you good as new tomorrow."

"Yeah you fucking better," She growled. "I can't shoot people like this now can I."

"Yeah yeah..." he moaned, scratching his neck. "You know, you do actually look-"

"If you compliment me as this ugly-ass ball of puss, I'll rip you a new asshole when I'm back to normal, you got me dipshit?"

"...yeah, I got you." he said solemnly, patting her gently. A moment passed with nothing said.

"...egh, it's... not too bad once you get used to the pressure," she said as an annoyed blush spread across her cheeks. "Still irritable as fuck though. Rock, you got an extra cig?"

"Sure thing," he said, taking out a cigarette and sticking it in Revy's lips. "Here, I'll light it for you." He leaned in, pressing the lit end of his cigarette to her's, lighting it up. Revy's blush deepened, accompanied by a scowl.

"...Thanks, Rock," she said curtly.

A moment of silence passed in the night as both drew on their cigarettes, the acrid smoke of burning tobacco mixing with the sweet fragrance of Revy's juices. Rock ran his hands through her hair gently, smiling.

"You do smell nice like this, you know?"

"...Fuck off, Rock."

---
Rock fell backwards onto the floor; his arms, exhausted from manhnadling Revy's juice filled bod all night, lay limply at his sides. With a groan, he struggled to his feet.

"Let's.... call it a night..." He said, pushing up on the nightstand so he could sit on the side of the bed.

Revy grunted, her body shivering due to the mixture of juice and sweat clinging to her indigo skin, as she too struggled to stand up, hiking her distended daisy dukes up around her still-thick waist.

"Thanks, Rock. I'm still a fucking fatass." She moaned before yawning. "Still, I guess it could be worse, given how much of a complete shithead you turned out to be." She turned around, walking over to the table to collect her things.

Rock laid down on the bed, crossing his legs and pulling a cigarette from the carton on the nightstand. "Don't act so high and mighty, Revy," he said with a smirk, sticking it in his mouth and lighting up. "I know you liked it; or were all those moans just a joke?" He began undoing his juice stained shirt.

Revy chuckled darkly with her back turned to Rock as she lit up a cig of her own. "That's right, a joke." She stuck it in her mouth and took a drag. "Just like how you fucking me up with that drink was just a joke." She picked up one of her Cutlasses and pulled back the slide, chambering a round, then repeating the process with the other. "No harm done, right?" She said with a grin, spinning around with her Berettas held up in the air.

Rock's smirk vanished, his cigarette drooping as his lip quivered. "What are you getting at-"

"But you know what, Rock?" She said, methodically strutting towards him. "Maybe you're not the only one here with a fucked-up fetish, hmm?" She leaned in to him, her hand pressing down against his arm, still clutching her pistol. In a quick motion she threw her leg over his and was quickly stradling him, her extra weight easily pinning him to the bed. Rock gasped at the pressure on his pelvis, though it wasn't the only involuntary response he felt.

"R-Revy!" He stuttered, squirming underneath her. "What are-"

"Maaaaybe," She said, her grin widening as she pressed the barrel of her right M92 into his head. " I have a fetish for putting a little extra lead in your skull."

"Y-you're joking right?" He squealed; it was impossible to hide his discomfort now.

Revy scoffed, tilting her head. "Come now, Rock. You see how hot and bothered I get when I'm pluggin' holes in fuckers. " She licked her lips, berry saliva falling onto Rock. "Standing at the precipice of death, and pushing another poor fuck over the edge; its the greatest erotic pleasure of them all, much better than your faggy fruit shit."

"Y-you wouldn't-"

"Tell me, Rock. What makes you any different than any other dumbass gangbanger her crosses me?" She dug the barrel deeper into his cheek. "You poison me, turn me into your bloated sex toy, and after eight hours of slapping my tits around you think I'd just put all this behind me right?" She lifted her left pistol up and fired a shot into the ceiling. "Because I'm well-known for my fucking understanding and compassion."

"R-Revy!" He said, panting. "I never-"

"Shut the fuck up and laugh, pig." She said, grinning ear to ear. "Because remember, this is all a joke. This amused you, right? Me being a blue fat fuck tickles your funny bone, doesn't it. So I wanna hear you fucking laugh."

Breathing heavily, Rock managed a wheezing guffaw, his eyes wide and his body shivering in terror.

Revy starred Rock down for a moment before frowning. "Jesus, you're such a dipshit, Rock." She pulled the pistol away from his head.

Rock sighed in relief when Revy leaned in, pulling the cigarettes from his and her mouth before softly kissing him on the lips. Rock's cheeks flushed red at the unsolicited romantic intimacy, but he tried to maintain what little he had left of his composure. After a few fleeting seconds she slid her head across his cheek, bringing her mouth to his ear.

"But Rock," She whispered.

"Y-yes?" Rock stammered.

"Don't ever fuck with me again."

The barrel of Revy's pistol came down hard across Rock's head, knocking him out cold.