Dear Jake,
Oh, how quickly feelings can change. We used to be so close, and now we don’t even talk. We shared all our family drama, all our school drama, everything. And I miss being able to share those things with you. But I can’t anymore. We were in two different relationships. I always felt that you were in love with your ideal me, and not the real me. I tried so hard to tell you how I felt about that, but you didn’t listen. I tried to let you down easy, but you were too stubborn. You started to force your feelings on me, even when I told you I wasn’t ready. I told you that I had problems, that I no longer felt ready for this relationship, but you told me I was silly, that everyone had those “problems”. But you were wrong. I wasn’t ready, and your refusal to listen only pushed me away more. I really tried to be ok with it, but I couldn’t. It got to the point where when we talked in class, I would sit facing away from you, because I couldn’t even look you in the face. I remember how we used to talk so much before class. Sharing the events of the previous day, upcoming tests, or things we were looking forward to. I can still remember sitting backwards in my blue chair to face you, because you sat behind me. How we'd compare homework on the white desk, as our classmates chattered around us. I remember turning around when the teacher started class, waiting until we could continue our conversations. But we lost that. You ruined that. You pushed me too far, so I ran. I wish I could go back. More than anything, I wish we could undo this. I wish this had never happened, and we were still friends, happy and innocent. But I’ve been scarred by you. You ruined me. You ruined my perception of the world. You robbed me off my innocence of how horrible relationships could become so quickly. And so I wrote you this. I admit, I’m a non-confrontational, passive-aggressive, wimp. I can’t look you in the face and say this, so I’m doing it in letter form. I wish you the best, and I’m sorry I’m not the girl you wanted me to be.
Sincerely,
Sesha