" Greetings Fellow Executives,

I'd like to begin by congratulating all of you on reaching a board position in our lovely company, Garnet Corp. We hear at Garnet Corp are very proud of our very dynamic board structure that consists of "influencing" and "not bribery" that enables people to rise to the top so quickly.

I'd like to begin by asking every what their opinions on the upcoming christmas party, it appears that our employees are tired of simply "christmas" themed parties and wish to change it up. Any ideas? I for one am partial to the theme "under the sea", though I hear doing that would be a Titanic undertaking.

Secondarily, it appears one our programs has come under fire by numerous groups for false advertising by calling elimination games "Death Matches" even though no death occurs in them. As such the following names have been suggested:

1. A Game in Which the Losing Player is Eliminated
2. Garnet Corps, Super Happy Elimination Time
3. Chad
4. Definitely Not a Death Match

Alternatively we could introduce actual death into the matches, but that has been considered "poor taste" by our focus groups.

Lastly, I'd like to share with you a picture of our employee of the month, Maximillian, who has shown great persistence, even working out in the cold: https://i.redd.it/ywyx4maawr221.jpg

He is a very good boy.

Regards,
Head of Marketting who is definitely not Vash

P.S
If you happen to see me and have any valuable information, I am more than willing to hear you out for a potential trade"