For The PTFG

Jul 20th, 2016
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  1. "OW! Jesus Pinkie!"
  2. >Pinkie let out a hearty "What?!" through the sound of your hand
  3. "LET GO!"
  4. >You try and fail to break your hand free of her mouth.
  5. >This has to constitute a consequence.
  6. >You yank your hand out of her mouth with a grimace.
  7. >You see a bit of blood on the bite mark trailed its way across your fingers, ending at the last portion of your pinkie finger.
  8. >Even your high school class ring has a scratch on its gem.
  9. >Which means that Pinkie's teeth are harder, and sharper, than a gem.
  10. >You've literally just been bit by the jaws of life, you realize… As the perpetrator runs off to do other Pinkie promises.
  11. >You know what! You're not going to her birthday party!
  12. >That'll show her!
  13. >You squint your eyes, shaking your head in light confusion on how you could have possibly come up with a tamer revenge scheme.
  14. >Since you've gotten here, you found that it doesn't take much to punish these ponies.
  15. >You spill their chocolate milk, you can almost hear the angst white teen music playing in the distance, and the razor blades coming down on their hooves.
  16. >No use cutting yourself over spilled milk.
  17. "But muh chocolate" you say, pseudo arguing with yourself.
  18. >You would cut yourself over spilled chocolate milk, you realize.
  19. >You also realize, that you're not getting anything done, and that you've been staring at your blood soaked hand for about a minute now.
  20. >You decide the best course of action is to move out of your current position, and into some other position that would benefit you greater.
  21. >A radical idea, but it's worth a shot.
  22. >After a couple of gasps at the seemingly ridiculous realization that you have moved more that twenty feet, you've made yourself comfortable in the waiting room of the local hospital clinic thing that ponyville setup after Pinkie Pie tried baking muffins.
  23. >Fucking.
  24. >that horse is the incarnation of riding in the danger zone.
  25. >You fumble around in your pockets, looking for a pair of sunglasses so you may finish your overplayed thought gag.
  26. >Nobody in this waiting room would get why the asshole in the corner that's losing whole organs in the hole in his hand decided to put on a pair of sunglasses.
  27. >But damnit you'd find it funny.
  28. >You give up, with a light feeling of unfufillment, finding that you have no glasses to put on.
  29. >After a couple of successful waiting operations, the nurse was finally considering weather you should live or die.
  30. >"Anon?"
  31. "Jesus about time."
  32. >"she just smiles blankly, like an airline pilot.
  33. >You wipe your blood soaked hand on her coat, and she jumps a little.
  34. >Lets get this over with. You have to-
  35. >Actually, you have nothing waiting for you.
  36. >You're actually financially supported by Princess Celestia, you tell her bullshit about earth, and you basically get a slip that says 'Go Crazy, Bucko.' and then you go get drunk and try lighting ponies on fire.
  37. >Not a bad life, so far.
  38. >Twilight went up pretty well.
  39. >but most of them are flame retardant, for some reason.
  40. >After a bit of sowing, you deem nurse Redheart a-okay.
  41. >You throw your left thumb up, and you turn out the door, and back to your home.
  42. >You down some cereal and milk, and fall asleep at the late late hour of about three thirty P.M.
  43. >When you wake up, you're very well rested, and It seems Rarity had let herself in to shake you with her perfectly white hoof.
  44. >You don't want to get up. And Rarity must've silently left by the time you woke up. the clock reads 8:34.
  45. >You stretch, in an effort to greet your morning.
  46. >You use your right hand to get yourself some cereal, and you silently eat it while listening to the radio
  47. >Opting to stay in your clothes from the day before, you walk out while singing 'Handlebars' by the Flobots to yourself.
  48. >After you really wake up, your question yourself on why you thought Rarity was in your house.
  49. >Was It the smell?
  50. >You don't know.
  51. >by the time you got to the third verse of 'Handlebars' you were at twilights library, ready to better yourself and read some.
  52. >A white pony on your left opens the door for you, and you walk in, Twilight isn't present, so you 'check out' a random novel for yourself, and you use her bed as your area of study.
  53. >The covers shuffle below you and twilight comes up from the bed, a bit disgruntled.
  54. >You conclude that you've actually woken up in the P.M. Hours, and it is actually Friday night.
  55. >You look her in her shocked and disgruntled eyes.
  56. >you blink, and opt for some damage control.
  57. "Welp, sorry."
  58. >You throw off the covers, and Twilight's levitation grabs you on your left hand and jerks your body over, to the point that your hand was about two inches from her eyes.
  59. >After a bit of contrived Twilight Brand Babbling, you kind of really wake up from the state you were in.
  60. >You notice, the pony following you around was… you, in a way.
  61. >Because your left hand was now cloud white, and about the size of Twilights hoof.
  62. >With a bit of deduction, you conclude that you now have a hoof for a left hand.
  63. >You didn't notice this all morn- evening.
  64. >You can really go that long without using your left hand? You question.
  65. "Impressive." you say, in response to your previous thought.
  66. >"Indeed" twilight says nearly dragging yourself into the depths of her library.
  67. >After a moment of being attached and tied down, twilight turns on a device of sorts, and all sorts of seismometer data piled onto the floor.
  68. >You were trying to come up with a sarcastic comment, but twilight had silenced you with a gag.
  69. >she took a ruler to your head, measuring your proportions, comparing them to the original data that was taken upon your arrival to equestria.
  70. >Then she had taken a simple hoof to your forehead, and started rubbing it, you felt her go over a goose egg on your forehead.
  71. >Your brain stops writing things down, and soon the gag is removed, and you try for a sarcastic comment, but you care to little to even try at this point, because you just wanted to sit in and jam to some music.
  72. >Twilight lets out a harumph, mostly due to the fact that you really didn't want to hear that you had to the count of five to live- or something along those lines.
  73. >Twilight likes telling people about what she finds, but it seems that her friends don't care either.
  74. >"What I found was-"
  75. >She went on anyway, which means you have the obligation to be in the same room as her for the next twenty minutes.
  76. >"Active magical based alpha particles, I call them, or AMBAP, for short-"
  77. >You started feeling the same feeling as when you were hypnotized at that stage at the Dallas fair.
  78. >Neat.
  79. >"So going among this algorithm I can deduce-"
  80. >Change. Yeah, that's pretty apparent.
  81. >"Already grown one centimeter in either direction-"
  82. >you close your eyes, scratching your hair with your one hand.
  83. >"Does this make sense to you?"
  84. >You shake your head, and Twilight deflates slightly, but she's used to being shot down, and she begins to compile her thoughts in laments terms. But you have places to be, and you push open the door with your Rarity hoof and get on home.
  85. >Twilight tries to get your attention on the way out, but you're not having it. So you ignore her and leave, with the book you were going to read in your right hand.
  86. >You open the door to your house, and after a bit of exercise, you're in your comfortable, plush seat, accompanying you is your record player, playing equestrian swing and rock and roll music reminiscent of the music from the fifties.
  87. >You silently bob your head while reading up on making potions that mostly require Pegasus feathers.
  88. >After you get done reading the hefty 102 page book, you place it on top of your growing stack of read books on the side of your chair.
  89. >Your eyes ache after reading alchemy 101, and you turn in for the night, at about 3AM.
  90. >Hey, maybe you'll actually wake up the nex-
  91. >Your eyes open, and it's the next morning.
  92. >You eyes go right down to your left arm-hoof-thing to access the damage.
  93. >The hoof's fur has climbed up to your shoulder, and the bones have moved to accommodate the likes of a hoof.
  94. >And you find it hard to move it left, unable to follow the range of a human arm.
  95. >Emotional panic begins to well up in yourself, but you swallow it down by putting up the illusion of not caring.
  96. >You blink twice, and walk out the door, and to sugarcube corner.
  97. >Insecurity wells up in you as more an more ponies turn their heads to look at you.
  98. >You shake it off as you see the building coming up.
  99. >You have a feeling of immediate doom, and now, for some reason you really, really want to know what's happening to you.
  100. >You turn around briskly, and head in the direction of twilights, suddenly found with the urge to know why you're mutating like you are.
  103. >OH! I KNEW HE'D BE BACK!
  104. >You trot to the door with a smug look on your face, ready to give one hell of a lecture on the history of transformations.
  105. >You magically open the door.
  106. >"Hey Twilight!"
  107. >You deflate slightly, but not much.
  108. "Oh! Hey Pinkie, is it your day off?"
  109. >"No silly! but I have a promise to complete, so I came here!"
  110. >You squint slightly, a little done with pinkies unplanned shenanigans.
  111. >Whatever, you think…
  112. "What is it?" you say with a mask of attention.
  113. >"Rarity's going to be gone for a few days, so don't try to get anything from her until then!"
  114. >That's it?
  115. "Anything else?"
  116. >"Nope!"
  117. >She goes through a very strange combination for her pinkie sense, and you turn to start rummaging for your umbrella hat.
  118. >"Woah! Uh… I mean… Anon's on his way here to wonder about his slow and maybe deadly pony transformation!"
  119. >You turn to her. And squint.
  120. "Impressive, did you get that from your Pinkie sense?"
  121. >you just a hoof out, rolling it around in a gesture of questioning.
  122. >"No, I just kinda assumed that one…"
  123. >Oh!... That's… You don't even know.
  124. >"Well, I'm off to Fluttershy's to polish her boots! See you then!"
  125. >Not a single period in her entire side of the conversation.
  126. >You're impressed.
  128. >On your way over to Twilights library, you see pinkie pie pass by… waving her head back in fourth as if she's broken into song.
  129. >But all you hear is the sound of an instrumental as pinkie passes, so.. You suppose- that Pinkie's song voice is broken.
  130. >"She's all yours!" she shouts out when she gets about one block behind you.
  131. >Oh… Okay…
  132. >You start, and fairly crash hard at rapping one of Eminem's earlier songs.
  133. >Walking to the door, you start thinking of what to say. But the door abruptly pops open, and a more than excited twilight pops her head out.
  134. >"Ah! Anon! I think you're here for some context?"
  135. >You look down upon your hoof, which had begun going down to your waist at that moment.
  136. "Y-yeah, please."
  137. >You stuttered more out of distraction, more so than embarrassment or anything along those lines.
  138. >"Well, it's caused mostly by a form of subatomic particle, with a catalyst of DNA."
  139. >Your head jerks up, mostly- you thought, these ponies knew nothing about science… especially DNA.
  140. >Oh, right.
  141. >This might be because of the Princess's conversations with you.
  142. >So they might not all be bullshit.
  143. >"These types of behaviors are not unorthodox in bipedal organisms, as appropriated in the Shishniwah Colonies in the early 1300s, which were colonized by equestrians around that time, as when the natives, which had looked much like you, anon… but were much- much more uneducated…"
  144. >She paused, and you noticed, that you had taken a seat in a desk, and she was reading off of note cards.
  145. >You wonder for a moment on how you had simply blanked on that, but she continues.
  146. >"ahh- where was i… right, they- err… /comingled/ with the colonizers for a year or so. And a month after that, all the anon looking natives had succumbed of a strange disease. and it is written in great adventurer 'north seas's' journal that they had all transformed into ponies, all in spans of about weeks after comingling with the settlers!"
  147. >Oh, by comingling she means sex. Neat!
  148. >"They Had all started at the crotch, showing more and more equine styled nethers."
  149. >She Draws a huge, accurate Horse Penis on the chalk board, fully erect.
  150. >You now know what she does in her spare time.
  151. >"After that, it had moved down until they're along the lines of ancient Satyrs!"
  152. >She flips the board over, and in a moment she had a very detailed half you half horse on the board.
  153. >With a Greek style posture, complete with another horse dick.
  154. >You really tell celestia a lot about humans, don’t you?
  155. >You wonder what they know about the Beatles.
  156. >"Then From the nethers, approximately when the tail is four inches long, it would move from the waist to the top of the head, until they were then quadruped!"
  157. >"Okay! Things to prepare for!"
  158. >She brings up her cue cards.
  159. >"If you happen to become female- which may or may not happen! Your going to experience female levels of arousal, which is much, much more intense than males whom undertake these transformations!"
  160. "Only the humans that go through these, these transformations?"
  161. >"Yes, anon… most mares only experience the level of hormones present constant in transformed ponies during the spring time. It's quite debilitating during finals week, to be honest."
  162. >Okay, hoping for male!
  163. >"If you happen to become a unicorn… it'll be unprecedented!"
  164. "At this point, I just hope that my lower half transforms before my top."
  165. >you look around the room, and lean in a bit.
  166. "How long do I have, doc?"
  167. >She looks at you and comes closer… after a bit of examination she simply states- "About Three Days and fifty minutes"
  168. "Ah, so about Tree Fiddy."
  169. >"Wait… what?"
  170. >And with that, you walk out the door.
  171. >You're gonna miss being able to play musical instruments.
  172. >And typing, you won't be able to type anymore.
  173. >Definitely no lewd things.
  174. >You look down to your remaining hand.
  175. >This thing has done a lot for you.
  176. >A smile creeps up upon your face, knowing that you've got three days to be sort of human again.
  177. >You'll be a different thing entirely, so it's like… as if this body dies and your consciousness will be transferred into your pony body.
  178. >Groovy.
  179. >You bring your hoof to your face, and touch your cheek with the interior of your hoof.
  180. >It's alien, Indescribable almost- you notice that your hoof is much more sensitive than your face, which is strange.
  181. >It's going to be a trip to walk on these if they're more sensitive than a dick tip.
  182. >The feeling is very reminiscent to the crest of your foot, which you walk on regularly.
  183. >You don't know, you'll see how it goes.
  184. >You find yourself back at sugarcube corner, Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band is playing on the stereo and record you provided.
  185. >'A Little Help From My friends' is playing, you note- and it causes you to laugh as it's nearly what you needed to hear.
  186. "Get by with a little help from my friends."
  187. >You smile.
  188. >"Hey Pinkie."
  189. "Hey Pinkie."
  190. >Wat.
  191. >She parroted what you said when you were-
  192. >"Yeah, I know…"
  193. "Not even beginning, pinkie, get me some whole milk please."
  194. >"Yeah, it's no issue, let me get that- oh wait! Here."
  195. >She reaches under the counter and grabs you a cup prefilled with milk.
  196. >Beatles and whole milk… nothing quite like it to lift the spirits.
  197. >"So- how's the whole 'one-of-us' thing going?"
  198. >"hoping for unicorn?"
  199. "Yeah, probably… hopefully I can imitate hands with magic to some degree."
  200. >You look down to your hand, which doesn't look any different.
  201. >Lucy in the sky with diamonds comes on, albeit with less bass than you remember.
  202. >You smoothly word the lyrics, closing your eyes and nodding your head, showing off a look reminiscent of a drunk person who's lost himself to emotion.
  203. >"I wrote something along the lines of this song back about half a year ago."
  204. >Wat.
  205. "Elaborate, Pinkie."
  206. >She begins telling you about a long drawn out adventure to Yakyakistan, home of the Yakyakistan yaks hoofball team.
  207. >By the time she gets to her involvement with the band, the room had cleared out a bit.
  208. "So, the wonderbolts miraculously saved you, then you made a band called 'The Pinkles' where you toured the world as a sensation…"
  209. >"yeah! That!"
  210. >You really wanted to call bullshit. But the pony in front of you is not above saving the world. So anything can happen to such types.
  211. >so you go with your instinct.
  212. "Jesus it's like someone read a history book and said 'fuck it! We'll do it live!'
  213. >"Moreso clawing for money."
  214. >Oh.
  215. "Welp. Good talk, Pinkie."
  216. >"Oh, yeah~ hey anon, you coming to your Congratulations-you're-no-longer-a-degenerate-party?"
  217. "Human's aren't degenerate!" you snap back.
  218. >"Oh. Okay. Then are you coming to your Congratulations-you're-becoming-a-pony-party?"
  219. "Yeah, sure- if it means free cantaloupe and cake."
  220. >"Sure does!"
  221. >Fantastic.
  222. >You turn and walk out the door.
  223. >Where do you eat?
  224. >What do you have to do?
  225. >IDK.
  226. >Oh, twilight might want to monitor you.
  227. >it'd probably be better than having her chase you around staring at you with a pair of binoculars.
  228. >You turn, and look at the nearest bush.
  229. >And, as plain as day were two lenses about three inches apart.
  230. "If you want to watch the becoming-a-pony thing you should ask, it's not like I have anything better to do."
  231. >The binoculars go down, and a Twilight in a military helmet comes out, twigs breaking as she does so.
  233. >"Really?!"
  234. "Why are you even asking for confirmation, Twilight, it's not like my sarcasm is difficult to spot. Geez."
  235. >"So you mean what you said?"
  236. "Yeah! YES! Watch my lips Purplesmart!"
  237. >"Oh! Okay! Thanks for this opportunity to-"
  238. >You tune her out.
  239. >The straps are reassuring, the tightness of it making you well inside with a bit of arousal.
  240. >You find yourself wandering like Dion, and you shake yourself out of your head.
  241. "So, twilight, what are we monitoring here?"
  242. >You hand moves in a circular motion underneath the straps.
  243. >She starts to go off on magical fluctuations and such.
  244. >"The good news is, that since this is such a slow transformation, we'll get a lot more readings! Right now we just need a baseline, what condition you're in right now, then when we have that you're going to have to come back every thirty minutes for an update. Then we can-"
  245. >Goes off some more, and you start to just compile a vague description of what she's saying.
  246. >Blah blah blah, report to celestia, blah blah blah, changes in life, blah blah blah, history and shit.
  247. >Would be cool if you became a unicorn.
  248. >A time passes, and Twilight Undoes the straps and lets you loose for half an hour.
  249. >the first day goes by underwhelming, the fur going downward is about half way down your thighs, your tail is about 8 inches long, and a sky blue, with a cream streak.
  250. >You're at your house, at this moment, in a red leather Victorian looking seat observing yourself and taking mental notes.
  251. >There is no cutie mark, but your seat is a bit more plush, which has you worried that you may become a female, the transformation process has kept away from your crotch, leaving you with no for sure thing.
  252. >Twilight is left dumbfounded when it comes to 'what's next' and is basically using her science excuse to stare at your ass and take notes.
  253. >At least you weren't going to have some strange anime looking color scheme.
  254. >You use one hand to put up air quotes and a hoof to compliment it, it seems when you tell your hoof, you see- to do something a hand normally does, it seems to try, which might mean that some dexterity from your old hands may carry over.
  255. >Shiet, you're doing more scientific observation that twilight.
  256. >It's about ten thirty now, and you're ready to go to sleep.
  257. >But now that you think, in six hours your fur went about a foot, now down to about your knees.
  258. >So- if you go to sleep, nine hours will pass, so it wouldn't be a surprise to wake up a satyr.
  259. >You're a bit nervous to wake up in the morning, what if you can't walk?
  260. >What if you-
  261. >God you really don't want to wake up a female.
  262. >You really don't, you mean, you've fantasized about being a female, even the whole 'transforming into a female' thing, but this seems drastic.
  263. >Plus the whole 'wake up a nymphomaniac' thing seems a bit scary thing to jump into.
  264. >You need to get your mind off of this shit.
  265. "Book! Need a book!"
  266. >Woah, you're much more nervous than you were in your head.
  267. >You surprised yourself with your outburst.
  268. >Okay, book.
  269. >Here's a good one- 'Daring Do and the Quest For The Sapphire Stone.'
  270. >What are you thinking! It's ten thirty, you need to sleep!
  271. >You smile, parroting what you think a pony thinks like.
  272. >Such innocence- it might be a happier life, honestly, being so happy to just be alive.
  273. >Where you own the world, but the deed just hasn't been signed yet.
  274. >No battle scars. The worlds best medicine being friendship, healing all mental scars, at all costs.
  275. >No reason to sing the blues.
  276. >The world you live in doesn't ever lie to you.
  277. >As you think about this, the stress you've been holding onto subconsciously, the stress that's been hammered into you from being told.
  278. >You might just finally be able to take your life one day at a time.
  279. >Shit, now the reason you can't go to sleep is no longer fear, but the realization that you're no longer in earth anymore.
  280. >Despite all this, though, you found yourself going to sleep in your chair.
  281. >Tomorrow will be perfect, as so will the next day.
  282. >You wake up, head popping from the seat.
  283. >You look down, as if looking at a tree on Christmas.
  284. >Right! Pants! You need to take off your pants!
  285. >You fumble with the buttons to pull down your jeans.
  286. >You look down, to see… nothing.
  287. >just, a belly. Which means…
  288. >Uh oh.
  289. >You just might have-
  290. >Uh oh.
  291. >To the mirror!
  292. >You turn over, and get to the near body mirror.
  293. >Your tail is a foot an a half long, and it seems that the rest of your body is built like a pony, with back hooves as well, and your face is restructured as well- and you notice… that your eyes are pony sized, with two large ears.
  294. >Your blinks take a noticeably longer time.
  295. >Okay- Moment of truth, you've spoke, but are you-
  296. "Am I Female?"
  297. >You close your eyes, and sigh… shaking your head.
  298. "Of course I am"
  299. >your eyes trace up to your head…
  300. >You've got a horn.
  301. "Unicorn!" you simply blurt out.
  302. >Okay, okay- Hair.
  303. >Spiky, blown to the right side, with a seemingly wild look- with tufts of hair going up in random directions.
  304. >Cutie mark!
  305. >You turn- to see… nothing.
  306. >Well, that's no surprise.
  307. >Eye color!
  308. >You see a muted red-pink-color.
  309. >You notice, before you run off, that your fur isn't entirely filled in, and there's a couple of patches on your sides and face which have skin, albeit colored skin.
  310. >You don't bother with taking off your tank top, as it still fits kinda nicely- even though it's a bit baggy.
  311. >Out the door! You need to see twilight!
  312. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTAud5O7Qqk
  313. >Thud* Thud* Thud*
  314. "Twilight! Twilight! Check this shit out!"
  315. >You use two hooves to tap a rhythm on the door.
  316. >the door opens, and you trot in a circle with a smile.
  317. >"Hello, what do you nee-"
  318. "It's me! It's anon! check me out! I'm a pony!"
  319. >"You're a mare…"
  320. "I Know! Right! Check it, and I don't even feel heat!"
  321. >She eyes your spots on your fur.
  322. >"Not yet, anon- you're not done transforming."
  323. "Oh, yeah- there you have me right."
  324. >You stop spinning.
  325. "I'm positive you're going to want me in your basement now, yes?"
  326. >She simply nods quickly, and you trot with a slight sway to her basement, planting your hooves on the machine, waiting for twilight to strap you in.
  327. >"Cmon, Cmon, Cmon- Science me like your french babes, twilight!"
  328. >She giggles, and you smile despite it.
  329. >"you're like Pinkie now, Anon!"
  330. "I know! Right- I've got so much energy! I don't know how you girls do it!"
  331. >"Now all you have to do now is predict the future~"
  332. >You laugh.
  333. >The straps go down, and you have a nice bantering session while she checks all the numbers, making her graph.
  334. >Some time comes and goes.
  335. >you attempt to break the silence.
  336. "Hey, Twilight, I ever tell you about THC?"
  337. >"You're not thinking straight, Anon."
  338. "It's this- this thing, definitely a thing!"
  339. >You're having trouble thinking your thoughts through, but that is no issue.
  340. >"Calm down, Anon." she says with a smile.
  341. "I'll tell you where my off switch is! All you gotta do is ask!"
  342. >You bust out laughing.
  343. >"Eck- Anon, stop. You've had your fun!"
  344. >She has a point.
  345. "Yeah, yeah- you're right, there was a line and I passed it. Now tell me the situation, doc!"
  346. >She breaks out with the science jargon again, and you just put on a passive smile.
  347. >She finally gets done, and the straps come off.
  348. >You start recreating 'Sail' by Awolnation on your way out, complete with screaming every time the bass is struck.
  349. >You simply laugh when seeing how shaken twilight was.
  351. >"SAIL!"
  352. "OH! HEY PINKIE!"
  353. >"SAIL!"
  354. >Shit, you're indoors, inside voices
  355. >"Welcome to sugarcube corner! I'm Pinkie Pie!"
  356. "I'm Anon! Nice to meet you Pinkie!"
  357. >You reach out two hooves and violently shake one hoof.
  358. >She gasps loudly while doing a maneuver known only to the history books as the 'Pinkie Sees a New Pony In Town' maneuver, a natively difficult move to learn, let alone master like Pinkie has.
  359. >"You're BEAUTIFUL, ANON! I Can't believe it! I have to update the party!"
  360. "Party?!"
  361. >"Yeah! It was 'becoming a pony' but now its an entire other beast- Literally!"
  362. >"Oh- it's also supposed to be a surprise, so… act surprised, I guess?"
  363. >You laugh, and pinkie starts shoving you out.
  364. >"Go- go go, I've got to get started, years of hard planning are going into this!"
  365. "Yeah! Yeah! It's no problem- I'm going to go do something!! Definitely something!"
  366. >"That's fantastic, Simply fantastic!"
  367. "I know, right!"
  368. >Right!
  369. "See you at the party, Pinkie!"
  370. >You should see rarity! You'd get a lot done around her, yes?!
  371. >Of course you would! You don't know why! But you definitely would!
  372. >You trot down the road, thinking of philosophical questions as you go.
  373. >N… Nope, nothing. Oh well.
  374. >"Hello, miss! Welcome to the Carosel Boutique! How can I help you!"
  375. >Okay, Anon- Calm yourself, you need to act like a normal-
  376. "Hey Rarara! I'm Anon! yes, my transformation is complete and I will soon destroy the world, since you were wondering."
  377. >"Anon! Really!?"
  378. >She eyes you up and down and does a trot around you.
  379. >you felt hot breath on your nethers, and you nearly jumped out of your skin, turning shortly afterwards… placing your muzzle about two inches in front of Rarity's
  380. "You break it you buy it, lady."
  381. >"Oh, sorry; but I was just confirming something."
  382. "I thought it was pretty obvious that I am a mare, Rarity, I thought you were the foremost authority on who's a stallion and who's not."
  383. >"It's not that, anon! I was seeing who was going to go into heat soon."
  384. >Heat?
  385. "Ponies don't just smell eachother's cooches like that!"
  386. >"Actually, Anon- it's quite commonplace for ponies to do that… especially when they put off as many pheromones as you do- I'd invest in a chastity belt of some sort, because that's going to hit you like a train."
  387. "I'll unfuck it when it get's fucked."
  388. >"Woahoahoah, anon! manners- you need to learn how to be ladylike… a unicorn /must/ be graceful and beautiful, especially when you look like you look."
  389. "But I don't wahna, Rarity, that's sounds too difficult."
  390. >"No Buts, Lady! You cannot simply squander the gift you've been given!"
  391. >You two go back and fourth like two hens for a couple of minutes, and Rarity finally busts.
  392. >"Okay, Anon- how about you come back in a few weeks, and I'll teach you at least the best bits of being a lady, how's that?"
  393. "Do I get a free tub of ice cream to eat while I flick it?"
  394. >She actually giggles at your attempt to offend her.
  395. >Between giggles she says "No, anon,-but you can have a couch, though. Nobody touches my gelato!"
  396. >Uhh.
  397. >Change the subject!
  398. "Can I try the dresses on?"
  399. >"This cute little number is inspired by the four alicorns. This one in particular- my most popular of the four dresses, almost caused me to shut down my business!"
  400. >God- this dress is tight on you, but it is comfortable, for some reason, it wraps you like a second skin in some places, but it doesn't obstruct movement.
  401. >This is one hellova different fit than what you're used to.
  402. "Do I twirl? Is that a thing? Can I twirl?"
  403. >"Of course, anon. go ahead."
  404. >You do a bit of a 360, and Rarity clicks with her mouth, and shakes her head.
  405. >"That's not you, anon- atleast, not with the blues and whites, here- try the- the Celestia dress!"
  406. >A curtain comes up, and Rarity basically tackles you with the other dress, using surgical precision to switch the dress, which makes more contact than the last dress, with the exception of the rear end, which instead of being covered by a tight pair of underwear, was left uncovered.
  407. >You wonder what that says about the princess it's based on.
  408. "Hey, Rarity- do you mind adding a highlight of pink in my mane? I think that would help a lot with the color of the dress."
  409. >"Uh- that's actually a very good idea, look at you, anon! coming up with stuff like that all on your own."
  410. "I know, it's neat- right! Anyway… can we get this going for me?"
  411. >"Of course, right this way!"
  412. >There's a hairdressers place here?
  413. "Is this area for your customers?"
  414. >"No, Darling- it's for me, realize that I live here, Anon."
  415. "Right, that makes sense, so what about the hair dye?"
  416. >"I've got dyes of all type, Anon- I mean, what do you take me for?"
  417. >She pulls your hair mane thing back and puts a few clamps in, signaling a few choice tufts of hair to dye.
  418. >"So, Anon- I heard the whole case from Twilight when she came in for a trim last week."
  419. >"But it's really strange to see something like this, even with magic as prevalent as it is compared to your world. So, can you describe what you're feeling?"
  420. "First off, Twilight gets her haircut here?" you make a look of light confusion before continuing… "And secondly, I'll go back to when shi- things really went different."
  421. >You calm down and think of the words you say before you say them, crafting and weaving your words; which is a far cry from today's mindset.
  422. "So I guess I'm here, really killing time until tonight's- erm, tonight. I mean."
  423. >Rarity sighs, you decide that she knew about the party, and she almost found out you did.
  424. "How's that pink coming along?
  425. >"Very well, darling- I also threw a little green into the blue of your mane so now your hair is- well, here… you can look while the color's settling in your mane."
  426. "Mane, my mane- that's really a strange sound seeing as you're talking to a person who spent 14 dollars a haircut."
  427. >"Dollar, darling?"
  428. "Erm, It's my world's currency. It's similar to the bit when it comes to quantity for exchange. The minimum you're allowed to be paid for an hour of labour is about 7 dollars, so two hours of minimum pay labour for a haircut."
  429. >"That doesn't seem that bad."
  430. "It really isn't, Rarity- seeing as many jobs pay upwards to thirty for an hour of labour-"
  431. >"You really do change when you calm down. Anon- now it seems you're somepony else."
  432. >You run the last couple of minutes back through your head.
  433. >Yeah, you really did kinda lapse back into your reserved personality you carried with your old body.
  434. >This last day has been a real rollercoaster of emotion with you, almost if it was a haze.
  435. >You realize how different you've been all day.
  436. >You look at your hooves.
  437. >So that's what this is- did your brains chemistry change as well?
  438. >You look up and study the new white with aquamarine and pink highlighted mane you have on your head.
  439. >You think this is stylish, it's beautiful- and you can't wait to wear it with the celestia dress.
  440. >"Oh I know you'll be marvelous with it, dearie- it doesn't matter the personality, anon- you're always you, and you always will be, even though if you're more effeminate than your male self."
  441. >You blink, and look at Rarity. With mild confusion
  442. "Did you just hear my thoughts? I mean, it's not unheard of in this-"
  443. >"Darling, you said them out loud. Just don't worry your new little head… Everything will be A-Okay!"
  444. >She turns the chair around. You notice that you're smiling.
  445. "Thanks Rarity, I needed that."
  446. >"Now for the tail! Now Bend!"
  448. >"Like sarcasm's going to stop me, darling- I've been doing this for a long time."
  449. >In a moment your tail is pinned up to your hair and she begins the clipping the tufts out.
  450. >You know exactly why spike really, really likes to hide out in 'that one back room over there' now for his 'naps'
  451. >You would, too- if you had anything left down there.
  452. >"Sheesh, anon- you really are hitting this room with the musk. Here-"
  453. >Something moves right up your cooch and your ponut, and you almost assumed that she stroked you with her hoof, but when you turn back you see something that looks suspiciously like a bar of soap moving away from your backside.
  454. "Are you cleaning my mare bits?!" you simply call out.
  455. >"No, darling- this is a deodorant. It's lightly imbued with purging powers, so anything up to the smell of death is promptly covered for about twelve hours."
  456. >Well, that's… expository.
  457. >"Here, I'll throw a stick into your goodie bag."
  458. >Goodie bag?
  459. >She runs back before you can really dwell on it, taking the clips off of your tail and letting it droop to your horse knees.
  460. >"Okay- now to throw you in the dress."
  461. >In a moment, you're back in the celestia dress. Literally making you feel warm with glee for being in such an aesthetically pleasing get-up.
  462. "How much for it?"
  463. >"You've been through a lot, anon- you can have it… let it be known that I made you feel pretty for the first time!"
  464. >She stands triumphantly and you just laugh.
  465. >You knew she'd give you the dress.
  466. >Additionally, you realize that you never really clicked with Rarity until you turned into a horse.
  467. >Neat! Maybe the mane six will all really click with you this time.
  468. >Maybe even Fluttershy, whom reminded you too much of your mother.
  469. >But her pet Discord was pretty chill, and he got you, and he seemed pretty lucid of who you were as well.
  470. >It makes you wonder if discord was a human and just got a much cooler transformation.
  471. >After a bit, Rarity comes back with a gift baggi-erm, gift box.
  472. >"Okay, I Suggest you wear that dress, atleast for the day- get a fit."
  473. >She totally wants you to wear this dress to the party.
  474. >You would flip a coin to figure out if you were going to goof with her, and watch her damage control while you say that 'you'll wear it tomorrow'
  475. >But she has stuff to do. And you really shouldn't bother since she gave you a dress.
  476. "You should have a great day, Rarity! And please don't overwork yourself!" >"Never, darling- you have fun!"
  477. >And with that, you conclude your visit with rarity.
  478. >Diving into the street, you let your hooves clatter on the warm cobblestone.
  479. >You stop in your tracks, and do a three sixty, taking in the area of Ponyville like it was the first time you was here.
  480. >Everything seems much, much more beautiful- looking deeply to appreciate the work gone into this to make you smile.
  481. >Everything was almost artistically placed to make ponies marvel.
  482. >You shake your large head in an effort to get back on topic, feeling surprised at how long your hair is.
  483. >your hair does seem to return to it's place, though- so there's that.
  484. >Maybe you could catch up with Fluttershy or Rainbow.
  485. >Applejack's obviously doing stuff today, she always is.
  486. >Rainbow dash is working as well, so- you suppose, Fluttershy's place it is.
  487. >At least to announce your transformation.
  488. >That word, 'Transformation' Urks you a bit, makes you feel a bit ashamed.
  489. >It's been tarnished by People who think that having 6 genders is a way to express yourself.
  490. >Now, now it tugs at you like a child wanting to go to sleep.
  491. >Every time you call the word to be used, it reminds you of the Stuff that stops you from enjoying your old world nostalgia.
  492. >Geez, now you're starting to sound like Twilight.
  493. >You can't quite pinpoint your personality, it's been everywhere today, including your same self pre-bodyswap.
  494. >Bodyswap.
  495. "Bodyswap, that's strangely satisfying to say."
  496. >Bodyswap bodyswap bodyswap.
  497. >Yeah, you can get used to this word.
  498. >You wonder for a moment how light of a drinker ponies are, before noticing that you haven't moved a muscle in this wonderful garden.
  499. >Right, to Fluttershy's.
  500. >After a small trot, you're positioned outside fluttershy's cottage, placing two hooves onto the door, and doing your new engineered double hooved knock.
  501. >After a bit of thuds, Fluttershy pops her head out the door, leaving the large amount of her self inside her house.
  502. >"May I be of service to you, ma'am?"
  503. >She says it in a half assed try at being official, she is town vet after all, you just smile.
  504. "Fluttershy! It's anon, Twilight's study buddy?"
  505. >"You look different than when I remember, is it the mane? Did you dye it?"
  506. >What a coincidence…
  507. "No, I used to walk on two legs, and through magic I am now on four."
  508. >"Like a diamond dog?"
  509. "Yeah, in a way- I was like a diamond dog."
  510. >"I don't know you too well, Anon, Twilight talks about you like when she found that copy of Fifty shades of ne-"
  511. >Her face turns a bit pale, and scrunches her snout, her eyes darting around making sure that nopony was around to hear her.
  512. >"Would you like to come in for some tea? We could get acquainted properly, then."
  513. "That sounds lovely, fluttershy- thank you for your consideration."
  514. >She turns, and You follow her into her house, taking attention to not catch the celestia dress on the assorted sharp things in the house.
  515. >She places a small cup, and pours the soothing tea inside.
  516. >You don't remember eating anything today.
  517. >It's about lunchtime and you haven't even had any water.
  518. >You think that levitation is just willing the thing to move on your behalf…
  519. >You focus on the cup to move, and… nothing.
  520. >That is to be expected.
  521. >You try again.
  522. >Nothing.
  523. >hooves?
  524. >You bring your hooves to the drink, trying to grasp it between the softer parts of your front hooves.
  525. >it holds surprisingly well, and you easily figure out how to grasp things.
  526. >Fluttershy is a bit perplexed, it probably stems from your lack of magic use.
  527. >She seems to have a small internal conflict, before dealing with herself.
  528. >You two begin talking about your girls' day, basically warming up your friendship.
  529. >You two get a pretty good idea of each other's lives, and really, to be honest- had an extremely normal conversation- naturally moving from politics to arts to animals to things that used to interest you back when you were swamped in human tech.
  530. >Talking about automobiles and computers, things that can be slightly replicated in equestria with derby cars and 40s esque scanners- but not to the level of earth.
  531. >Talking human history, eating cucumber sandwiches, just simply sitting and sharing information. A lovely invitation to be one's friend.
  532. >Soon enough, it is sundown, and Fluttershy seems to 'have somewhere to be'.
  533. >You too need to go elsewhere, you cap off before trotting out the door, smiling and thinking.
  534. >You think weather you should go to Sugarcube corner now or wait until somepony tries to take you there.
  535. >Putting real thought into your not so important question.
  536. >you decide; that Yeah, you should head home, see if you still eat meat.
  537. >You heard that meat can be consumed by horses, so hopefully you don't die.
  538. >After about 15 minutes of walking/ trotting you make it into your house off to the left of the castle of friendship.
  539. >The heavy wooden door opens, greeting your wall with a thud.
  540. >You walk into the main room, where a couch shows its face to a long gone out fireplace.
  541. >Disregarding the hunger in your stomach- you place yourself on your cloth couch, reaching for a book to read.
  542. >Your hoof goes out to the fireplace sitting near the couch, but you do not touch a book, rather- the book you wanted to read, a hemmingneigh called 'the sun also rises' floats off the shelf and into your lap.
  543. >You marvel at the scene, you have no idea how you did it- but there it is.
  544. >Thinking about this sudden phenomenon would not help, you find- and go to read the book.
  545. >The book floats up, with a small clear force field around it and allowing you to read.
  546. >With a smug smile on your face, obviously.
  547. >After a couple of chapters over and through you place the book back on your shelf with levitation that suddenly feels as natural as walking.
  548. >checking into your kitchen, you open the cupboard and produce a pony cereal brand that… simply put, is just cooked oats.
  549. >You float a near handful over and start eating the bits of oats like candy, which is a practice that you seemed to always carry, but the oats are a bit more filling in your new body.
  550. >You did crave a hamburger, though… and it saddens you that you forgot to defrost anything, making it impossible to cook.
  551. >During your walk, you decide to go to the town fountain, where you suppose a pony will try to get you into sugarcube corner.
  552. >Sitting down on the concrete, you eye the bits sitting in the bottom, noting that ponies make wishes as well as humans.
  553. >And here you thought ponies didn't need wishes, that it was a human construct for presenting will towards somethin-
  554. "Jesus Twilight, calm down."
  555. >"Oh! Sorry Anon, I didn't know I was bothering you."
  556. >You bolt up from your more human spot on the concrete to meet twilight, about 5 feet from you.
  557. >How did you not notice her?
  558. "Er- it's a long story, I was referring to myself when I said that. It wasn't you by any means."
  559. >"Oh… Okay then- Say, you wanna go get some late night desert?"
  560. "Late night? Twiggy its like one in the morning, this is when I usually eat dinner."
  561. >She shudders a bit at your comment. But you weren't kidding, if there hadn't been a party going on you'd be a-boiling some gryphon brand hot dogs.
  562. >"Well- Then some pre-dinner foodstuffs?"
  563. "Well, yeah- that sounds pretty good. Lets go get a salad or something."
  564. >"Okay! Thanks for letting me take you! I know you're very busy and all!"
  565. "No, no- it's no problem."
  566. >She keeps hammering in her thankfulness, thinking she's successfully lied to you.
  567. >little mare has big cute, cute on cuter.
  568. >You note as well, that you well a bit warm.
  569. >Not Estrus, not arousal. None of that has popped up yet.
  570. >It’s a more happy warm, a comforting- 'come in for tea' kind of warmth.
  571. >Due to the barrier of difference being broken, ultimate individuality… unlike humans where you're unable to recognize a passerby because they simply look like the last passerby.
  572. >Humans morph and fold in on themselves, stopping you from noticing the differences that make them unique.
  573. >On ponies- you realize, that is gone- at least in some way, every pony has a much different look, from color scheme to race… Ponies seemed designed rather than manufactured.
  574. >Which, on some level allows more interesting interactions seeing as all have differences to match their experiences.
  575. >You realize why your warm…
  576. >You understand.
  577. >Finally, you understand why ponies are so much more happy, they interact more because they're subconsciously interesting to the eye, making for a culture that revolves on wanting to know more about everyone, the mail mare- the salesman.
  578. >You Smile a smile to match your warmth wrought from understanding.
  579. >You forgot that you had a party waiting for you, and genuinely thought you were getting a salad and having a comfy time with Twilight.
  580. >"SURPRISE!"
  582. >You fall on your ass and then realize what happened.
  583. >Your shout turns into a laugh as ponk explains the nature of the party, even though she knows you already know.
  584. >Getting up, you dust off your dress before greeting all the ponies. You notice that all of the mane six plus a bunch of the ponies that just sort of sit in and not interact with you.
  585. >After the initial 'hellos' and 'huzzahs' you go straight towards the punch bowl and take a big whiff.
  586. >Testing testing, 1… 2… 3…
  587. >Oh yes. It's very alcoholic.
  588. >Also camping by it is a pony you only recall as 'Berry'. She must have mixed the punch.
  589. "How alcoholic is this?"
  590. >You point towards the bowl.
  591. >"I dunno, there's a lot, they told me to put more alcohol than punch."
  592. >They do know me.
  593. "Good shit, boss."
  594. >You grab a cup and scoop up the juice, and pound it down.
  595. >now you really feel warm.
  596. "ANOTHER!" you shout, making someone say 'Luna made it out?'
  597. >You burn through about three cups, and turn, smile, and go to fuck some shit up.
  598. >The couple of ponies you did know laughed when you started telling soft jokes.
  599. >Fluttershy, remarkably- went right to the punch bowl as well.
  600. >Then Rainbow Dash, then Pinkie Pie, and soon the mane six drank all the punch.
  601. >then another bowl came out.
  602. >Then Twilight's Intern went at the punch. You heard she was a villain, but you have no idea her name.
  603. >You think it's a synonym to Twilights? You don't know, her name to you now is Near Nighttime Twinkle.
  604. >But you're not going to approach her until she's drunk enough to guess your name, too.
  605. >"Hey, Anon."
  606. "Huuh!"
  607. >"Over here, anon."
  608. >You turn to be greeted by a neigh sober applejack.
  609. >Neigh
  610. >You crack yourself up.
  611. "Yee? Hey Appul, what's up?"
  612. >"I just wanted to say hey- you're the… the person of the hour, so I''m greeting you."
  613. "You sound Autistic, Appul. Whattaya need, really?"
  614. >"That’s- That’s it, really."
  615. "A'ight, you've got nothing going on then. I shall find more interaction."
  616. >"Sounds good. You have a great night."
  617. "You know it, autist."
  618. >Confused sounds were uttered from applejack as you trotted off in a snakey wakey line.
  619. >Back at the punch bowl.
  620. >Another!
  621. >Down the hatch. And gone.
  622. >Off to Fluttershy.
  623. "Fluttershy!"
  624. >"Hey anon!"
  625. >She ended her statement with an exclamation point.
  626. >Woah
  627. "That- that was really hot."
  628. >"Yeah! Err… hey. Tell us about your life, anon!"
  629. >Pinkie pops up, and reassures Fluttershy's statement.
  630. >soon all the ponies are gathered around. Ready to hear your stories.
  631. >Everybody, this party's perfect, beautiful women everywhere!
  632. >You feel a song coming on.
  633. >You get really close to fluttershhy.
  634. >Oh yeah. Its happening.
  635. >A magical beat comes up as you open your mouth to sing.
  636. >As the lyrics leave your mare lips you dive and jive and fly run around doing motions to match the lyrics.
  637. >not all of them safe for work.
  638. >After a bit of thrusting and sucking on the furniture, a couple of the other drunk ponies jump in, singing the chorus- DJ Pon3 being one of the first to join, then twilight, then Rainbow Dash, then Near Night but not Quite Night Glisten joins.
  639. >by the last chorus, you've got a choir singing, dancing, and flying, and- yes… synchronized 'acting' of the lyrics.
  640. >everyone falls onto the floor by the time the magical beat runs its course, laughing at what seems to be everyone's favorite new sound.
  641. >Some of them didn't know what you were singing about, but a few like DJ Pon3 and Rainbow was giving you hoovebumps after the number.
  642. >You think you've found your new drinking buddies.
  643. >A couple like Cherilee and Applejack just shook their head, waddling in their pony values.
  644. >You just smirk at them before Pon3 pulls out her speakers. And the dancing to what seems to be eurobeat begins.
  645. >After a long night of dancing, jumping, and laughing you black out.
  646. >You wake up on the floor of sugarcube corner. Surrounded by the more irresponsible ponies.
  647. >Getting up, you place whats left of your mind back into your head. And head home.
  648. >You smile, you made another pun.
  649. >Seems like you just experienced the first Saturday night you've had in a while.
  650. >You need water, breakfast. And sleep.
  651. >Then to celestia.
  652. >She needs to hear about this.
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