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- Night Befo Crizzmus
- Wus da night afo' Crizzmus, and all thru da hood,
- everybody be sleepin' and da sleepin' be good.
- We hunged up our stockins, an hoped like all heck,
- dat dear Ol' Obama's, gunna brang us our checks.
- All of da family, was ly'in on the flow,
- my sister wif her gurlfriend, and my brother wif some hoe.
- Ashtrays was all full , empty beer cans and all
- when I heared such a fuss, I thunk...."Sh'eet, it must be da law".
- I pulled the sheet off da windoe and what I'ze could see,
- I was spectin' the sherrif, wif a warrent fo' me.
- But what did I see, made me say, "Laaawd look at dat".
- dere was a huge watermelon, pulled by 8 big-ass rats.
- Now over all of da years, Santy Claws he be white,
- but it looks like us brotha's, got a black un' tonight.
- Faster than a poe'lice car, my homeboy he came,
- and whupped up on dem rats, as he called dem by name.
- On Biden, On Jessie, On Polosi and Hillary Who
- On Fannie, On Freddi, On Ayers, and Slick Willy too.
- Obama landed dat melon, right there in da street,
- I knowed it fo' sho', - can you believe that Sh'eet!.
- Dat Santy didn't need no chimney, he picked da lock on my doe,
- an I sez to myself, "Son o' bitch...he don did dis befoe"!
- He had a big bag, full of presents - at first I suspeck?
- Wif "Air Jordans" and fake gold, to wear roun my neck.
- But he left me no presents, just started stealin my shit.
- He got my guns and my crack, and my new burglers kit.
- Den, wif my crap in his bag, out da windoe he flew,
- I sho' woulda shanked him, be he snagged my knife too.
- He jumped back on dat melon, wif out even a hitch,
- and waz gone in two seconds, "democrat son of a bitch".
- So nex year I be hopin', a white Santy we git,
- 'cause a black Santy Claws, just ain't worf a shit !!!
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