a guest Jun 19th, 2017 48 Never
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- I need to commit suicide. Basically, I need a method which is extremely simple and cheap, something that can only be detected after the deed is done. Something that I can accomplish without having to deal with others, either in the preparation mode or execution mode. And something that, for the most part, won't affect others until it is extremely too late. That is, I want to sit down and ingest (eat / drink) something, look like I've simply fallen asleep, and be left alone until I have started to decay or otherwise gotten to a point of no return. I like to be drunk, so if such takes effect only with alcohol, so be it. In fact I would welcome such a "complication." I love alcohol. It is pretty much the only thing in this life that I enjoy (well, sex, but I have so few people who will help me out there, that it is hardly worth mentioning).
- I absolutely, in no way desire or hope for anyone to tell me to "go for help." This is the help I want. This is the help I need. With it, I *might* feel that I can go on because I will have "a way out" so that when the time comes I can do it. Without such a "way out," I will always be looking for one, which will take much more time than trying to convince me that "life is good." If you really want me to feel that way, give me a real "out," such that I won't have to take it, rather than some platitudes that have no meaning. Because as long as I think that I can't get out of this life, that will be what I am looking for. If I have a sure way out, then I can quit looking for that, and instead concentrate on making this life better. Which no one seems to want to do. Everyone seems to want me to keep on suffering with the crap I'm going through. "Oh, it'll get better! Find a doctor!" Like I haven't already tried that. I have. And it hasn't worked. I'm taking three different types of medicines (unfortunately, none of which are fatal) and I'm still hoping to die.
- I know where I want to die. I know how (practically, if not medicinally) I want to die. If I have the means to die, I will be able to hold off because then I will know that I can take care of myself. Without that knowledge, I will continue to search for a way to kill myself, and perhaps use it at the earliest possible moment, whereas if I have the knowledge to do it at will, I will most definitely feel that I can go a little longer and thus *not* kill myself at the most opportune time.
- So take your pick. Tell me how to do it in the way I want to do it and hope that I won't do so, or don't tell me and realize that there is the possibility that I will do myself away at the earliest possible moment.
- It's up to you, but if you want me to stay alive, the best thing to do is to give me the means to kill myself. As long as you don't, I will definitely keep searching, and perhaps take that way out as soon as I can. After all, I have read enough to know how to do it slowly (and painfully). I will do that just to spite you if you don't tell me a quick and easy way to do it. Because I would rather do that than have to deal with old age, disease, injury or some other way that really sucks.
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