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Oran Mini - It Didn't Even Matar

Bigwood Oct 13th, 2011 101 Never
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  1. [22:33:36] <Clarity> It's the 8th of Summer!  Or maybe it's the 9th?  Nobody pays attention to this shit, only the fact that it's not the 6th.  And talk of UFOs has been going around-- but the only people who would ever care are those attuned to the over-the-top weird.  And guess who that is?
  2. [22:35:08] * Clarity HEADS TO THE GARAGE, amazingly energetic despite the other day's heroic efforts. 'Heroic' being a synonym for 'moronic.' And of course, a Shinx wearing an Omanyte hat follows, with worry in all four of their collective eyes.
  3. [22:36:09] * Balthazar is playing RAWK'EM SAWK'EM robots with Rodan while Señor X watches. Of course, he has the advantage due to the fact of his hands not being feathery wings!
  4. [22:37:00] <Clarity> Now... where was the entrance again?  Was it a door?  Who cares!  A fist finds itself moving over to a wall or something even if there isn't one... and then it starts.  Bang.  Bangbang.
  5. [22:37:03] <Clarity> Bangbangbangbangbang.
  6. [22:37:11] <Clarity> BANGBANGBANGBANGBANGBANGBANGBANGBANGBANGBANG.
  7. [22:37:33] <Clarity> "Good MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR~NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!  IS ANYONE IIIIIIIIN THERE?"
  8. [22:41:22] <Balthazar> "OH VHAT IN ZE HEAVENS!" <She's making too much noise, boss!> Rodan says while swooping on the huge double door that guards the garage. "Just open it, ze door is unlocked since zat stupid brute almost took my UFO avay... I should make another one, an UNBREAKABLE ONE!"
  9. [22:43:56] <Clarity> "Oh yeah!"  With a big smile, Clarity jumps back and KICKS the door open.  Strangely, it seems to do more damage than that natural 20 kick against the cubones, but we don't question how the world works.  We just don't.  Marching along and gazing with 'ooh's and 'aah's at everything lying around with exaggerated curiosity, she marches inside followed by the hybrid beast before spinning around and stopping with a big smile at the boy.  Man?  Teenager.  Person!  "I'm bored!  Everyone's boring in town and this place is cool, we wanna do cool things."  A triumphant nod... triumphant, why?  Maybe we'll never find out.
  10. [22:47:06] <Balthazar> "Of course it's boring 'ere, eh? If not, i'd not be experimenting on stuff!"
  11. [22:48:00] <Balthazar> "Or making explosives. BOOM! ZAP!"
  12. [22:48:03] <Clarity> "Experimenting?"  A head-tilt, followed by a glance at the Shinx that essentially says 'oh yeah, this is awesome.'  And of course, he rolls his eyes in response too before his lazy teen owner plops down.
  13. [22:48:44] <Clarity> "Maaaan, that sounds so cool!  So much more than just... selling stuff or..."  A pause, followed by a shrug and a point.  "... Boring stuff!"
  14. [22:49:23] <Clarity> Pout, too, not a point.
  15. [22:49:39] <Balthazar> <Ey boss, who's dat girl? She's your friend or sumthin'?> Rodan swoops into Clairty's head. "Hmph, i am testing a very important contraption right now!" He grabs the child's toy and puts it on the ground. "BEHOLD, ZE TOY OF ZE FUTURE!"
  16. [22:51:06] * Clarity blinks a couple times, before gasping ridiculously loudly and staring in pure awe. "Holy crap!" Sky even reaches his paws up to his ears in annoyance, causing him to tip over. The omanyte hat struggles to stay on.
  17. [22:51:09] <Clarity> "... What does it do?"
  18. [22:51:54] * Balthazar pulls one of the toy's levers. The robotic thror suddenly moves and gives the mechanical sawk a kick right into the shins!
  19. [22:52:07] <Balthazar> "Hahaha, violence!"
  20. [22:52:52] <Clarity> Staring GLARING SCREAMING.  "More!  Moremoremoremore KICK HIS ASS!"  The Pokémon to the side, on the other hand, aren't getting into this at ALL and walk off over to the side, surveying the room on their own accord.
  21. [22:54:00] * Clarity shoots a fist-pump into the air with a loud "YEAAAAAAAAAAH!" when one of them actually wins, too.
  22. [22:54:15] <Balthazar> Rodan and X shrug and leave the two of them be, accompanying the Omahat and the Shinx. Balth meanwhile, starts pushing a lot of levers and buttons. The two robots keep punching, kicking, kneeing, elbowing and slapping each other, until the Sawk decapitates the Thror with a well-placed Judo chop.
  23. [22:55:02] <Balthazar> "Oh damn it, vhy are zhey so fragile..."
  24. [22:55:17] <Clarity> More awe, as the teenager shuffling around suddenly stops and stares.  "... Whoa.  What was that move called?"
  25. [22:55:59] <Balthazar> "Forward, Up, Down, B!"
  26. [22:57:07] <Clarity> An even longer stare, in disbelief for a second before starting to shake again.  "... I LIKE IT!  Well, it's totally either that or Zap Cannon today.  Hmmmm."  And then she started nodding along to nothing.
  27. [22:58:07] * Balthazar puts the thror's head back, and hands one of the toy's controllers to Clarity. "Come on, i vant to see 'ow it vorks on a 2P match!"
  28. [23:00:11] <Clarity> "Gotcha!"  Looking it over for a second, obligatory GRRL GAYMURR comments stay out-of-character over here.  But her eyes are filled with curiosity and fingers twitching already, with a smirk-grin combo as Zap Cannon shifts into place.  That or Sky Uppercut.  She'd have picked the latter without hesitating if not for the thought of punching a small animal in the air it evoked... and even crazy people don't like to do that.  So, stick grabbed and held in a position with its shaft between the pinky and ring finger, she was ready to go.  "My BURNING SPIRIT will destroy you!  Get reaaaaady!"
  29. [23:01:40] <Balthazar> "Mwahahaha, you haven't even read ze strategy guide i vrote, you 'ave no chance against my technical play!" Balth says while holding his controller and adjusting his glasses for serioustime. "Now it's me vho vill be ze ass-kicker, not ze ass-kickee!"
  30. [23:02:46] <Clarity> "Ahahahaha!  You have NO IDEA!"  And then when they began, furious motions got to work.  Of course, most of them are random and inconsistent, but... wait, he really wrote a guide for this?
  31. [23:03:30] <Balthazar> Tree
  32. [23:03:33] <Balthazar> let's do a rolloff
  33. [23:03:36] <Clarity> k
  34. [23:03:56] <Clarity> of what, though
  35. [23:03:58] <Balthazar> 1d20 SAWK UP UP DOWN DOWN RIGHT B
  36. [23:03:59] <DiceMaid-9001> Balthazar, SAWK UP UP DOWN DOWN RIGHT B: 11 [1d20=11]
  37. [23:04:00] <Clarity> inb4 int
  38. [23:04:03] <Clarity> 1d20 OH LIKE THAT
  39. [23:04:03] <DiceMaid-9001> Clarity, OH LIKE THAT: 20 [1d20=20]
  40. [23:04:40] * Balthazar presses his buttons carefully, and his Sawk bot starts in the offensive by trying to do a forward punch!
  41. [23:05:01] <Clarity> "GOGOGOGO!"  WHY WOULD YOU GIVE THIS GAME TO SOMEBODY LIKE THIS?  Sky flips through the guide while this is happening.  Because it totally exists.  But on Clarity's side, SHORYUKEN SHORYUKEN SHORYUKEN
  42. [23:06:05] <Clarity> And DPs totally have priority.  That thing gets a sudden uppercut before its manipulator even knows what she's doing.
  43. [23:06:26] <Balthazar> The Sawk misses wide his punch while the Thror SHORYUKENS HIS FUCKING HEAD OFF. The severed mechanical head flies on Balth's direction and nearly hits his face!
  44. [23:07:00] <Clarity> "YEAAAAA-" ... Blink.  "Whoops, that's not supposed to happen, is it?"
  45. [23:07:55] <Balthazar> "...Nope." He puts the controller down. "I... I didn't even programmed zat move!"
  46. [23:09:03] <Clarity> "Then that means..."  A moment for dramatic effect, while the mons over at the side look back in horror.  "... THAT THE ROBOT IS A GHOST!"
  47. [23:10:14] <Balthazar> "No... It must... Ze input put on controllers must 'ave done an unpredictable event... Most interesting, perhaps i did put it on ze robot, but subconsciously..." Beat. "Or he IS a ghost."
  48. [23:11:23] <Clarity> Gulp.  "So... what if they're both ghosts?  And they're actually dead warriors who said they'd rival each other TO THE DEATH, and now they're here inside robots evening the score?"  A gasp for a second.  "That's... SO COOL!"
  49. [23:15:33] <Balthazar> "Vell, i do believe zat Ghost in ze Machine is an expression, not a real thing! I mean, zhere are no ghosts! Barring zat jerkvad Vodun. Und zat Sigurd guy. Und Ectoplasm-shaped pokémons."
  50. [23:17:06] <Clarity> Head-tilt.  "Huh?  You KNOW ghosts?  And you..."  Another tilt, making assumptions based on his negative tone.  "... get into fights with them?  So you like... what's that word..."  Looking straight up, trying to remember what it is.
  51. [23:17:25] <Balthazar> "You know, thinking again, zhere must exist ghosts... I should make something to vard zhem out, like uh... Proton packs! But ze risks of crossing ze streams..."
  52. [23:17:43] <Clarity> "... Bust them?"
  53. [23:17:58] <Balthazar> "Vell, great-uncle's friends are ghosts. Or 'ave ghosts. SORT OF!"
  54. [23:18:04] <Clarity> "Like some kind of... ghost... buster?"
  55. [23:20:51] * Clarity lays straight down on her side with an obnoxious pout. "How did all you cool people with your awesome things end up coming to a boring ol' village like this, anyway? Nothing eeeeeever happens here!"
  56. [23:21:10] <Balthazar> "Eeeeeh, i didn't vent 'ere for choice. Did you?"
  57. [23:22:05] * Clarity rolls over to the OTHER side. "Er, happened." Then another roll, and another. Rollrollroll. "You bet I didn't! I wanted to go out and be some kinda ADVENTURER too, but it's always 'stay home and watch the house,' or 'don't get into trouble.' The fish are really boring too... but tasty."
  58. [23:23:37] <Balthazar> "...Vait, you 'ave a house? And you get into trouble all the time!"
  59. [23:24:17] <Clarity> She springs back up.  "Yeah?  But that's just like... normal stuff, isn't it?"
  60. [23:25:59] <Balthazar> "Vell, an UFO crashed into my 'ouse und i 'ad someone find zis veird egg, so it's not zat normal all ze time!"
  61. [23:26:23] <Balthazar> "I also got a crazy guy vanting to beat me up for no reason too!"
  62. [23:28:16] <Clarity> Nod, nod.  "Yeah, that's what I mean!  Ever since you all came here, all KINDS of awesome things happened... but before that it was all just, y'know, town stuff.  Like, there'd be contests and paaarties every now and then, but... nothing REALLY exciting.  Just stuff to read about-- and reading's totally boring."
  63. [23:31:40] <Balthazar> "You don't strike me about ze reading type, though. Zhen again, you vhere at ze timid girl's library... Ze one who's Sister's friend."
  64. [23:34:06] <Clarity> "Oh yeah, books are totally crap!"  More nodding.  "It's just, 'Ka got some new stuff in lately.  Some... main... guh?  They're really exciting with big pictures and HOT-BLOODED stories instead of boring writing stuff!"  And then with a yawn, she's back on the ground, rolling.  "But sometimes I WAS so bored that I'd go through books.  Some were okay, but they were so loooong that I'd just fall asleep partway through."
  65. [23:36:16] <Balthazar> "'ey, don't sleep on my floor! And vell, ze books i 'ad to read vhere ze boring ones from great-uncle. Do you believe 'e likes to classify types of Pokémon bones, droppings and teeth? I spent one hour reading ze difference of a Bastiodon's fossilized poop from a Carracosta's fossilized poop!"
  66. [23:36:45] <Clarity> "Yuuuuuck."
  67. [23:36:50] <Balthazar> "It vas stone poop al ze same!"
  68. [23:37:45] * Clarity does a very childish sticking out of her tongue, or some other 'blech' motion. "Well, at least you're family's AROUND sometimes, right? Sky's all I ever haaave most of the time~" With that, the Shinx is caressed and hugged more tightly than he wants to be.
  69. [23:38:56] * Balthazar shrugs. "Vell, after i got expelled i 'ave only sister 'ere... And she's too busy vith her stupid town guard and her stupid friend she kept visiting all ze time. Ze one from ze bar."
  70. [23:41:45] <Clarity> "Eh heh heh."  A giggle, and probably a malicious one too!  "Don't you like, talk to her a lot?  She seems like she has a lot of fun, even though she acts so weiiiiiiiiiiiiird sometimes.  Hey Sky, ever wonder how your kid's doing?"  No comment.  The animal stays still, so Zap Can- I mean Clarity only coughs a couple times.  "Still, you have ALL this awesome stuff!  There's no way you can ever get bored here, the rest of the village needs to get stuff like this."  Nodding some more.
  71. [23:42:59] <Balthazar> "Vell, no one ever bought my stuff... Except for ze library girl, und ze clock she bought vasn't even veaponized!"
  72. [23:44:25] <Clarity> Yaaaaaaaaawn.  "But you can totally still go places and nobody'll stop you from doing it, right?  It sucks so much to remember I've been here my whole life, and am probably never gonna GET to go anywhere else.  How do they always put it?"  A pause.  "'Follow your dreams?'  ... No, that's not right, that's waaaaaay too corny."
  73. [23:45:14] <Balthazar> "Vell, vhy you never left 'ere zhen?"
  74. [23:45:27] <Balthazar> "Is someone... Stopping you from leaving?"
  75. [23:46:14] * Clarity stops dead in her tracks.
  76. [23:46:19] <Clarity> "..."
  77. [23:46:24] <Clarity> "Huh."
  78. [23:47:22] <Balthazar> "..."
  79. [23:47:22] <Clarity> By this point Sky is struggling and squirming, like he'd be shouting "nononononononononono" if he had a voice.  He doesn't, so it just comes out as some lion-y screeching.  He escapes the grip and lands on the ground, but that's all he's able to do.
  80. [23:47:31] <Clarity> "They're not, are they?"
  81. [23:47:32] <Balthazar> "You... Never 'ad ze idea, right?"
  82. [23:48:28] <Balthazar> "You tell me, eh?"
  83. [23:48:29] <Clarity> "Welllll, I bet if I ever tried I probably took a nap and then woke up back home.  And that would've been.... how many years ago?"
  84. [23:49:07] <Clarity> "... Oh man.  There IS nobody who'd stop an ADVENTURE, is there?"  The edge of her mouth tingles with a stare down at the absolutely terrified pair of animals.
  85. [23:49:43] <Balthazar> "...B-b-but i don't think it's a good idea at all! Zhere are bandits out zhere!"
  86. [23:49:53] <Balthazar> "You should at least bring someone vith you!"
  87. [23:50:15] <Clarity> "Bandits are NOTHING!"  With a cackling, she does the usual overly-energetic act before stoping to look at the man- boy- ... teenager.
  88. [23:50:57] <Clarity> "You said this place is boring too, right?  And you make all these weapon-robots?  Heh heh- why don't we BOTH go?"
  89. [23:51:51] <Balthazar> "Hmm, an rendezvouz to ze outside... It might be ze perfect idea for testing my stuff!"
  90. [23:52:03] * Clarity ... starts trailing off. "And when we get back 'Ka could totally write about it, and we could buy healing potions from that Newt guy, and maybe that Buff Guy could come too, and we'd all get weapons from Mr. Balls, and..."
  91. [23:52:39] <Balthazar> "Don't buy veapons from zat jerkvad! I can make better ones!"
  92. [23:52:56] <Balthazar> "Like... My laserbeam! ZAP ZAP ZAP ZAP ZAP ZAP!"
  93. [23:53:04] <Clarity> "Oh yeah!  No, wait."  A small pause.  "Let's... get him to make sword, and then put sword ON the robots!"
  94. [23:53:08] <Clarity> +s
  95. [23:53:21] <Clarity> "So they'll be like... swordbots!  Robots MADE OF SWORDS."
  96. [23:54:13] <Balthazar> "Svords are lame, zhey are so last veek! You vant... A flamethrower. SWOOOOSH FIRE FIRE FIRE!"
  97. [23:55:23] <Clarity> And then the image of Arawn POOFs away from her derpy head.  "... Yeah, you're totally right, forget him.  You could shoot fire, and Sky'd be shooting laser beam bolts!  THAT'S why they call me Zap Cannon, ahahaha!"
  98. [23:56:57] * Balthazar starts rummaging around his stuff, an insane gleam on his eyes. "You know vhat... Ve need an vehicle for ze adventure." He suddenly points at the slightly-moved-around-but-yet-not-quite-out-UFO on the back of the Garage. "VE VILL GO ON AN ADVENTURE... TO ZE MOON!"
  99. [23:57:30] * Clarity releases an overly-loud gasp of excitement. "Is THAT the...?"
  100. [23:58:10] <Balthazar> "I am trying to rebuilt it, but i vill call it... ZE VAFFLE!"
  101. [23:58:20] <Balthazar> "Vait, vhere did zis stupid name came from."
  102. [23:59:20] <Clarity> "... Yeah, and why am I suddenly really hungry?"  Sky's stomach rumbles too.
  103. [00:00:35] <Balthazar> "You 'ad a breakfast?"
  104. [00:01:28] <Clarity> A pause.  "... Ohh, nope, THAT'S why!  I was so bored when I got up that I forgot about it!"  Still walking around the UFO and admiring all parts of it, though.  But no touching!  At least, not yet.
  105. [00:04:30] <Balthazar> "...I zink zhere are some rests of sandwich back there..." <But boss, i was going to eat those...> Rodan objects, but falls on deaf ears. Or brains. Whatever.
  106. [00:05:55] <Balthazar> "I mean, i just ate half of it!"
  107. [00:06:04] <Clarity> "Saaandwich..."  As Zombarity starts hauling off, she suddenly perks back up and spins around.  "But waitasecond!"  Then a stare.  A longer stare.  The longest stare.  The entirety of the stare is riddled with the horrors of what childish things she can be cooking it up... until it comes out.  Keep in mind the technology level of the village, anyway.  "... Isn't there cheese on the moon?"
  108. [00:06:22] <Balthazar> "And it's ham vith cheese, no stupid leafs."
  109. [00:06:42] <Clarity> "So, we could go up there... and bring back INFINITE cheese?"
  110. [00:07:34] <Balthazar> "That's stupid! Ze ship has not ze specifications to trail a large amount of cheese, und ze atmospheric reentry vould transform it into fondue!"
  111. [00:09:40] * Barkeep knocks on the door of the laboratory, waiting patiently with David on his shoulder.
  112. [00:09:41] <Clarity> "Hmm... yeah, too bad for everyone here, huh?  But if we could EAT the cheese up there..."
  113. [00:11:02] <Balthazar> "Oh man, another guest, eh? Please be a customer..." Balth heads to the garagebatory's door, which was actually open after Clarty came in and... "Oh. Hi." he says at Barkeep.
  114. [00:11:33] <Barkeep> "Hello, Mr. Balthazar. I hope I'm not interrupting anything."
  115. [00:11:37] <Balthazar> "Ewww, eating cheese from a strange place? You don't know from vhere it vas!"
  116. [00:11:40] * Clarity SKIDS over. "It's not a robot ghost, is it?"
  117. [00:11:50] <Balthazar> "Uh, n-n-no, nothingn nothing."
  118. [00:12:35] * Barkeep leans back a little bit. "Well... if you're sure, I have something I was hoping you can help me with, since you're good with machines and everything."
  119. [00:13:04] <Balthazar> "Is ze explosive you told another day, because i spent all ze nitroglycerin i got at ze firevorks."
  120. [00:13:10] <Clarity> A loud gasp as there's some... very odd noise while grabbing a shellfish and holding it out like a weapon.  "W-Watch out, it IS a robot ghost!  I'll fire!"
  121. [00:13:13] <Balthazar> *asked
  122. [00:13:22] <Clarity> "... Oh wait, no it isn't."
  123. [00:13:43] <Balthazar> "NOOOOOOOO-HE IS A CUSTOMEEEEEEEEEER!" Balthazar suddenly jumps on Clarity's direction!
  124. [00:13:48] <Barkeep> "Err, hello, Miss Clarity. I didn't know you were here as well."
  125. [00:13:50] * Clarity lets go of the omanyte, making a spongy SPLORSH.
  126. [00:14:15] <Clarity> "OH!  Hi there, Mr. Bark!  Sorry, just had to make sure you weren't a ghost!"
  127. [00:14:36] <Clarity> "... You're not a ghost, right?"
  128. [00:14:44] <Balthazar> "Uh... I don't think he is..."
  129. [00:15:17] * Balthazar suddenly gets up and fidgets around. "I-i-in any case, as i said, i have no TNT for now, but if you give me a few days..."
  130. [00:15:17] <Clarity> "Oh, okay!  We'll be over there, then~"  A big wave to the terrifying man before spinning off, humming a little.  Toward the back.  That poor sandwich.
  131. [00:15:18] <Barkeep> "My name isn't... no..."
  132. [00:15:26] <Barkeep> "And I don't want anything to explode."
  133. [00:15:51] * Barkeep seems to have the demeanor of someone attempting to stave off a massive headache.
  134. [00:16:12] <Balthazar> "Ah, i know, you cant a veapon for sister, right? She should 'ave come to take it 'erself!"
  135. [00:16:39] <Balthazar> "You vere vith her a lot lately, so i guess you are 'ere for zat, eh?"
  136. [00:17:06] <Barkeep> "Well, no, I didn't know Raven had a weapon you were working on. We don't really talk about you much."
  137. [00:18:56] <Balthazar> "...Oh." :<
  138. [00:20:04] <Barkeep> "I wanted to know if you can modify a piano."
  139. [00:21:37] <Balthazar> "...Vell, of course. You vant armor-piercing rounds, electrical nets or enemy-searching phasers?"
  140. [00:21:52] <Barkeep> "Why would I want any of those things on a Piano?"
  141. [00:22:36] <Balthazar> "Why would you NOT vant it on a piano?"
  142. [00:22:58] <Barkeep> "Please come up with three scenarios for me in which I would want those things on a piano."
  143. [00:24:27] <Balthazar> "You become a musical assassin! You become a musical killer for hire! You become a musical hitman!"
  144. [00:25:22] <Barkeep> "Those are all the same situation, but with different wording!"
  145. [00:26:56] <Balthazar> "Zhere is a difference you know... But uh... If you don't vant veapons on ze piano, eh? What's up?"
  146. [00:27:12] <Balthazar> "Maybe... A robot Mister Mime to play it, eh?"
  147. [00:27:19] <Barkeep> "I want to know if you can rig up some machinery to make the piano play itself."
  148. [00:28:16] <Barkeep> "As good of an idea as that sounds, I don't want to invite all the jokes that could be made about a 'Robot Pianist'. I like to pretend that my customers have some semblance of class, and I believe something like that might ruin it."
  149. [00:28:59] <Balthazar> "Eh, might vork too." he heads to a table and starts scribbling on a notebook. He crudely draws what appears to be a Octillery inside the piano. The octillery spews steam and looks roboty.
  150. [00:29:07] <Balthazar> "All right, i think i got it, eh?"
  151. [00:29:59] * Clarity prances over from the back with a mouthful, animals trailing along. "Huh? There's nobody here who knows HOW to play one of those things?" .. Or something similar, it's a little muffled.
  152. [00:31:16] <Balthazar> "I don't know 'ow to play it myself, but i might program ze robot to know it... Some'ow, it's a problem for later!"
  153. [00:31:30] <Balthazar> "In any case, i guess it's... 2000 P to make it, eh?"
  154. [00:34:29] <Barkeep> "Hmm... suppose that's fair, as long as it works."
  155. [00:34:52] <Barkeep> "Playing a piano isn't really too complicated though, it's just a matter of dexterity and being able to think fast enough."
  156. [00:34:58] * Clarity snorts a little. Business is silly.
  157. [00:35:03] <Balthazar> "Oh, it vill vork! ...I think. Any extra functions?"
  158. [00:35:13] <Barkeep> "Extra functions like what?"
  159. [00:35:22] <Clarity> "LASERS!"  It goes off before he can say it.
  160. [00:35:41] <Balthazar> "Hmmm, i might create a functioning AI, but ze risks of it going rogue... No, i vill vork it out."
  161. [00:36:02] <Balthazar> "Vell, uh... You could add a camera to take photos, eh?"
  162. [00:36:07] <Barkeep> "I have no intention of using music to injure, maim, cripple, kill or mutilate anyone."
  163. [00:36:22] <Clarity> "Oh, but it'd totally stop bar fights!  ... You have those, right?"
  164. [00:36:35] <Balthazar> "Or a self-destructing button! Und it's not -magic-!"
  165. [00:36:44] <Barkeep> "Stop them?"
  166. [00:37:03] <Barkeep> "They're great for business! I just have to convince them to go outside and do it in the ring of honor."
  167. [00:37:03] <Balthazar> "Crippling stops fights!"
  168. [00:37:17] <Clarity> "Well..."  A head-tilt.  "I dunno!  If I started to beat someone up and got shot by a laser I'd- ... Oh.  Right."
  169. [00:37:28] <Barkeep> "Then my customers can watch them and take bets on them. Losers buy the winners drinks."
  170. [00:38:01] <Clarity> "So..."  Lightbulb!  "Whoa!  You could totally have customers make bets to WRESTLE THE ROBOT PIANO!"
  171. [00:38:25] <Balthazar> "Yes! It vill combine gladiatorial sports vith music! Perfect entertainment!"
  172. [00:38:45] <Balthazar> "Perhaps just add shock prods und bludgeons for non-fatal beatings, eh?"
  173. [00:39:13] <Barkeep> "Well..."
  174. [00:39:37] * Barkeep shakes his head. "No, won't work. If the robot gets damaged it'll be way too expensive to repair."
  175. [00:40:34] <Balthazar> "Depends on ze armor plating, if i manage to get my hands on adamantium, perhaps..."
  176. [00:40:53] <Clarity> Gasp.  "You don't mean... that'd be an..."
  177. [00:41:07] <Barkeep> "I haven't ever heard of adamantium. Is it some kind of alloy?"
  178. [00:41:46] <Clarity> "I dunno either but it sounds awesome!  Skyyyy, get ready, this sounds like an ADVENTURE!"
  179. [00:42:19] <Barkeep> "I don't think getting beaten up by a robot in a bar counts as an adventure... does it?"
  180. [00:42:23] <Balthazar> "An incredibly strong one, but ve vill get our 'ands on it later, Clary, first i vill vork on our piano-playing octillery!"
  181. [00:42:47] * Balthazar grabs a small sack from his pocket and opens it. "First, ze funds please, mister Bark!"
  182. [00:43:34] <Clarity> "Awww, okay.  But GETTING the stuff to make the robot... something to finally do~"  Shaking around a bit before calming down.  Well, from a Clarity standard anyway.  Achieving... clarity of mind and all that stuff.  Insert your own sunglasses.
  183. [00:43:37] <Barkeep> "I will have some sort of insurance policy if it explodes, or otherwise doesn't work to my satisfaction, won't I?"
  184. [00:45:31] <Balthazar> "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA." Balth laughs at Barkeep's question. "You're on yoor own, eh?"
  185. [00:46:03] <Barkeep> "Well I'd really like it to work, especially if I'm paying up front."
  186. [00:46:33] <Clarity> "Ooh ooh!  I know, I know! Me, me!"
  187. [00:47:03] <Clarity> "... You said it's a piano, right?"
  188. [00:47:15] <Balthazar> "Vell, you can ask library girl, vat i made for 'er vorked!"
  189. [00:47:16] <Barkeep> "Yyyes, it's a piano."
  190. [00:47:48] <Balthazar> "In any case, i need ze money for ze materials, steel components aren't cheap, eh?"
  191. [00:48:41] <Clarity> "Oh, those're easy!  I totally learned to play 'em when I was seven!  If it doesn't work I'll do it for you, 'kay, Mr. Park?"  Fingers twitching.  The ability of such a person to play such a thing is questionable... though he said it himself, being dextrous is all it takes.
  192. [00:48:50] <Clarity> -Park +Bark, shhh
  193. [00:48:52] <Barkeep> "Wait, you know how to play the piano?"
  194. [00:49:15] <Clarity> "Yeah!  ... What, am I not supposed to?"  Head-tilt.
  195. [00:49:40] <Barkeep> "Well I wanted the machine because I didn't know anyone who played it..."
  196. [00:49:52] <Balthazar> "Interesting, i guess my not-'aving-to-program problem is solve-HEY COME ON!"
  197. [00:50:02] <Clarity> "... Whoops."
  198. [00:50:24] <Balthazar> "VAIT, JUST LET ME BORROW HER FOR A VHILE." Balthazar suddenly grabs Clarity's hand and heads to the back of the garage. "Okay, i need your brain."
  199. [00:50:52] <Barkeep> "... I really hope you don't mean that literally."
  200. [00:51:15] <Clarity> "Whoa!"  With a nervous giggle, the derp gets dragged back.  Not-so-reluctantly.  "... Eheheh.  I was gonna say I could do that when he left, buuuuuuuut..."
  201. [00:51:27] <Balthazar> "N-no! This time no..."
  202. [00:52:08] <Clarity> "Oh yeah!  It totally doesn't take brains anyway, you just have to stare at a piece of paper for a really long time and remember stuff.  My parents made me do it."
  203. [00:52:14] <Balthazar> "X vill map your piano-playing brain und 'elp me make a chip for ze robot!"
  204. [00:52:45] <Clarity> ... "OH!"  With a teenagery gasp, there goes the meaning of that last sentence.  "... 'Kay!"
  205. [00:53:24] <Barkeep> "I'm... not sure that's possible."
  206. [00:54:18] <Clarity> "No way!  He can so totally do it!"
  207. [00:54:24] <Clarity> "... Probably!"
  208. [00:55:24] <Barkeep> "Are you sure it wouldn't be easier for me to just hire you to play it?"
  209. [00:55:26] <Balthazar> "Probably!" Balthazar makes a positive sign with his thumb.
  210. [00:55:43] <Balthazar> "Uh... She's already my..."
  211. [00:55:45] <Balthazar> "ASSISTANT."
  212. [00:56:01] * Clarity doubles up the thumbs-up, especially at that last line.
  213. [00:56:45] <Barkeep> "How much is he paying you, Miss Clarity?"
  214. [00:57:00] <Clarity> "And it's totally awful to play too!  And I have way too much money!  Buuuut, if one of HIS robots really just ups and blows up like thaaaaat..."
  215. [00:57:12] <Barkeep> "Hmm..."
  216. [00:57:16] <Barkeep> "Well, all right then."
  217. [00:57:31] <Barkeep> "If your robot fails, I'll be counting on your assistant to fill the position."
  218. [00:57:33] * Clarity pauses, too. "Well, he's paying me in... in a trip to the moon!" A point straight up to the sky, not even noticing how embarrassing that sounds.
  219. [00:57:46] <Barkeep> "..."
  220. [00:57:51] <Clarity> "Gotcha!"  ... Then a whisper.  "But it won't."
  221. [00:57:51] <Barkeep> "Well there's no matching that offer I suppose."
  222. [00:58:16] <Clarity> "Oh, there so is!  Cheese from the moon probably tastes great, but your sister's curry is the BEST."
  223. [00:58:29] <Barkeep> 'Right."
  224. [00:58:32] <Clarity> "Right!"
  225. [00:58:35] <Balthazar> "Yeah, the trip vill do it!"
  226. [00:58:51] <Balthazar> "A-and ze robot vill not fail, i promise you zat!"
  227. [00:59:19] <Barkeep> "Well uh, you two have fun with that. Here, I'll give you the money for the robot up front then."
  228. [00:59:36] * Barkeep counts out 2k and hands it over to Balth. "When should I expect it to be done?"
  229. [01:00:17] <Balthazar> "Vell, i was going to make an exception and take ze money later, but... Oh vell, expect it... Tomorrow or after tomorrow, eh?" He takes the notes and puts it on the bag, before turning to the drawing board.
  230. [01:00:34] <Balthazar> "All right, now to hydraulics mapping!"
  231. [01:00:42] <Barkeep> "Really? Wow, that's a lot faster than I expected."
  232. [01:01:01] * Barkeep gives a nod. "I'll let you get to work then. Thanks a lot."
  233. [01:01:12] <Clarity> "Adventure~!"  The Shinx approaches Barkeep and gives him a 'good luck' bow on his way out, before reluctantly turning back.
  234. [01:02:01] <Barkeep> "By the way, you wouldn't happen to know what sort of presents Raven likes, would you Balthazar?"
  235. [01:02:43] <Balthazar> "Sis? Vell, i usually give 'er trinkets, but ze rifle she 'as vas ze one she liked best."
  236. [01:02:55] <Barkeep> "Wait... she's your sister?!"
  237. [01:03:33] <Balthazar> "Vell, not by blood, i just grew up on ze same 'ouse as her."
  238. [01:03:43] <Clarity> "The Guard Lady?"  And as the Shinx tries to escape, he gets picked up.  "She loves cute things!  I remember the first time she saw Skyyyy..."
  239. [01:04:06] <Balthazar> "Yeah, a plush might vork too!"
  240. [01:04:27] <Barkeep> "Hm. Well I expect she's already told you that we're dating then, if you're that close."
  241. [01:04:40] <Clarity> Pause.  "... A robot Sky?"
  242. [01:04:53] <Clarity> "Naaaaah."
  243. [01:09:14] <Balthazar> "...She did not said that."
  244. [01:09:24] <Barkeep> "Oh!"
  245. [01:09:27] <Barkeep> "Oh."
  246. [01:09:47] <Balthazar> "I thought you vere just close friends, but... You... Better be good vith Raven!"
  247. [01:10:19] * Clarity blinks in the bartender's face a few times, surveying.
  248. [01:10:28] <Clarity> "... Huh.  That mean she thinks you're cute too?"
  249. [01:10:43] <Barkeep> "I... hope so. I think she's cute after all."
  250. [01:10:44] * Clarity looks down at the adorable tiny lion and then back up at the man. Down, up again. Not seeing it.
  251. [01:11:02] <Barkeep> "I mean I can't be completely sure why she likes me back, but she does."
  252. [01:11:14] <Barkeep> "And really, that's good enough for me."
  253. [01:11:45] <Clarity> "Hmmm... kinda see it.  Well, that's great, huh?"  Her gaze shoots down to the shinx, whose face only says 'why are you asking me?'  He doesn't get an answer.
  254. [01:12:01] <Barkeep> "I'll try to take care of her though, Balthazar. Even if it's more likely that she's going to be the one taking care of me."
  255. [01:13:00] <Balthazar> "Vell, she is cute!"
  256. [01:13:21] <Clarity> "Well, yeah!  She totally kicks ass!  Isn't that what guards're SUPPOSED to do?"
  257. [01:13:40] <Balthazar> "And she's a nice girl, so don't make her cry, or i vill make ze piano eat you!"
  258. [01:14:51] <Barkeep> "I... I hope it doesn't come to that."
  259. [01:15:20] * Balthazar hmphs. "Very vell zhen... Clary, come help me 'ere vith something..."
  260. [01:15:47] <Clarity> "Goootcha~!"  Dropping the shocking cat, she spins around and follows behind, waving at Barkeep once.  Twice.
  261. [01:16:39] <Barkeep> "I'll be good to her, though. She's the first girl I've ever really felt this way about after all."
  262. [01:16:47] <Barkeep> "I'll see you soon then, Balthazar."
  263. [01:17:51] <Balthazar> "O-okay... I vill deliver ze piano-playing system later..."
  264. [01:18:52] <Barkeep> "Good day then." he smiles politely and nods before leaving to go back to the bar.
  265. [01:19:13] * Clarity hums along while marching ahead until he's long gone, before almost pouting a bit at the sudden stuttering. "Huh? Somethin' wrong?"
  266. [01:21:25] <Balthazar> "N-nothing... Okay, now can you write some piano songs right there, Clary? Und ve need to search ze Alizarin mines for Adamantium next week. It must be zhere somewhere!"
  267. [01:22:56] <Clarity> "Write?  Oh yeah, I left all the sheets back home, I didn't think I'd ever need 'em anymore so they're... in the attic?  The basement?"  Pause & tilt.  "... Both?"
  268. [01:23:19] * Clarity stares at the sheet of whatever's there and starts scribbling though. "But I think it was like... this... and, over there..."
  269. [01:24:42] <Balthazar> "Vorks for me!"
  270.  
  271. [22:31:30] <&Giantree> I don't think Clarazar is avoidable
  272. [22:31:41] <Plutonis> tree, you fuckass
  273. [22:31:50] <Plutonis> you know how i feel about this horrible shipping
  274. [22:31:54] <&Giantree> it's gonna happen even if we try to do it
  275. [22:31:56] <&Giantree> er
  276. [22:31:58] <Plutonis> which is approval
  277. [22:31:59] <&Giantree> even if we try NOT to do it
  278. [22:32:08] <&Giantree> I agree bro, let's run a shipping session right now
  279. [22:32:20] <&Giantree> ...
  280. [22:32:21] * Plutonis is now known as Balthazar
  281. [22:32:24] * Giantree is now known as Clarity
  282. [22:32:25] <zoofman> ahahaha
  283. [22:32:26] <&Clarity> #OranSquare
  284.  
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