Anon and Wallflowers Shit Taste

>You threw the last of the toppings onto your side of the pizza.
>Yours was loaded with about twelve types of meat.
>Does cheese count as meat in an existential crisis?
>Eh
>The other side was full veggie.
>There was a clear dividing line between your side and Wallflowers.
>After her magic thing she had gotten popular.
>Before being forgotten again.
>You had watched from the sidelines and it was really sad to see her spirit get crushed like that.
>Those girls tried to help, but the food the lunch guys served was more traumatizing than this magic stuff.
>This meant she was doomed to only be at a slightly better state than before.
>So before she hit rock bottom, again, you stepped forward.
>The two of you meshed rather well and before you knew it, she was shyly asking you on a date.
>Good thing too.
>You were about to ask her out yourself and watch her turn into a big green mess.
>You toss the pizza into the oven and set the timer, before making your way to the living room.
>Once you two started dating, interest in both of you skyrocketed just because of the weirdness.
>She worked on gardens and was kind of meek.
>You messed around with cars with your mom and were nearly as bulky as Bulk.
>Maybe more so because you didn't skip leg day.
>Everyone thought both of you were gay, so when word got around you were dating, you were the talk of the school.
>Wallflower tried not to get her hopes up, but found she was making some actual friends.
>You had to beat some of the gossipier guys back, but you were happy she was doing better.
>The girl in question is currently on the couch, nose in her phone.
>"Hey, Anon. What do-oop!"
>You place a hand on each of her hips and lift.
>She only wriggled a little since she was mostly used to this.
>You twist her around before turning to land heavily on the couch with the girl on top of you.
"Hmm, that's the good stuff."
>You preempt Wallflowers escape by wrapping your arms around her belly.
>This does not stop her wriggling and huffing.
>"Do you have to do this everytime you sit down?"
"Yes."
>She wriggles a bit more.
>"But you're going to have to go back to check the pizza. You'll have to get up and I was comfy."
"You can check the pizza."
>Her wriggling comes to a stop for a moment.
>"I'm kind of comfy now."
>You slowly start to lay down.
>She follows the motions, putting her head on your shoulder as you put yours on the armrest.
"How about now?"
>The smaller frame vibrates against yours as she hums.
>"I really don't want to get up now."
>You squeeze her belly, returning her hum.
>You both lie there, enjoying eachothers company and warmth.
>Until you get bored.
>You crack open an eye and start to look around.
>After a bit, you notice Wallflowers phone is in her left hand.
>She never lets you anywhere near it.
>And right now it was right next to your hand.
>Time to be an obnoxious shit.
>You take your right hand and start to slide it up her left side.
>She hums once again, nestling into you and reminding you of something you had forgotten.
>As her legs slide downwards, you place yours tactically for when you are ready to strike.
>Your right hand starts to tighten around her left arm.
>You wonder how mad she'll be.
"We should watch a movie."
>Your left hand starts sliding down.
>"What do you want to watch?"
>You feel the top of her phone, but try to keep from jostling it in her hand.
"I was thinking Daring Do and Wallflowers phone."
>All at once, you pull her with your right arm, push with your legs and grab her phone.
>It wasn't pretty, but it sent her deeper into the couch and you off of it.
>You laugh as you run towards the bathroom.
>It took Wallflower a moment to realize what happened.
>"Anon get back here right now!"
>You laugh louder as you slam the door shut behind you and lock it.
>She's pounding on it a second later.
>"Anon open this door, or so help me-"
"Oh, are you going to hurt defenseless little me, Blushy? I thought we were closer than that."
>The door knob rattles before she answers.
>"You are neither of those things! And I don't care if you're a guy, if you go through my phone I'll-"
"Ooooh, look at what little naughty Blushy has been going through! What a bad girl."
>You pocket her phone and lean on the counter.
>You weren't actually going to go through it, you just wanted to tease her.
>And by the sounds of things, it was working.
>The pounding has returned in full force.
>"Anon you need to get out here right now!"
"Oh Wallflower, how could I possibly do that now that I know what you've done?"
>You think she's kicking the door now.
>"I know you haven't seen todays password so I know you couldn't have gotten in there, Anon! Open this door!"
"But Blushy-"
>"SHUT UP AND GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN, SLUT!"
>This is Sides, contacting control.
>We are in a stable orbit, awaiting further orders.
>The pounding stops as you collapse on the floor, trying desperately to breath.
>"A-Anon..."
>That is the funniest thing you have ever heard her say.
>"I-I didn't mean it, I just go to some websites and..."
>Does she go to the board?
>You knew you picked a good one.
>"I know that's not a good excuse but..."
>Little noises start to escape that sound like a chipmunk doing CPR on an engine.
>"Nonono, please don't cry, Anon. I'm sorry! I didn't mean it! I just-"
"BAHAHAHAHA! Holy shit, really?! Get back in the kitchen?! Blushy, you are ADORABLE!"
>Wallflower is quiet as you continue to laugh.
>"S-so you're not mad?"
>You try and wrap up a fit of giggling before answering.
"I'm only upset that you chose that as an insult."
>You pull yourself up off the floor so that you can open the door.
>There you see a very red Wallflower rubbing her arm.
"And slut? Really? No class in todays youth."
>This gets a reaction from her.
>"We're the same age!"
>You smirk as you throw the little green girl over your shoulder, getting a small squawk from her.
"Well you're clearly not as mature as I am."
>You can feel the hate radiating off her right now.
>She's probably just keeping her mouth because she feels like she should be in trouble.
>"I wish I understood guys."
>Or she's trying to understand the opposite sex.
>Good luck with that!
>You toss her back on the couch and hand her her phone.
"I didn't try to go through it, I promise."
>She takes the phone, looking somewhat guilty.
>"I'm really-"
>BEEEEEP
>You smile as you look towards the kitchen.
"Pizzas done. Let me go grab it."
>You strut into the kitchen and grab a hot pad.
"Hey! Hey Blushy! I'm back in the kitchen! Are you happy now?!"
>You hear her groan as you pull the pizza out.
>"I'm never going to live this down, am I?"
"Nope!"
>The groan is louder as you set the pizza on the stove.
>You turn to see the face of misery painted green.
>"Can't you just...I don't know. Do my nails and have this pass in one go? I'll even show them off to my friends."
>You cross your arms as you grin at her.
"Unless you want them done in engine oil, no I can not."
>She hangs her head and groans for the third time.
>"Can you at least not tell my parents?"
"So long as you answer a question for me?"
>She lifts her head, giving you a cautious look.
>"What?"
"You said you've been to some websites-"
>"Tell my parents!"
>You smirk as she starts to panic.
"Would it happen to be a Neighponese basket weaving forum?"
>The growing panic slowly turns to confusion.
>"Y-you've been there? But you-"
"Have a penis, yes."
>Her eyes drop for a moment before rising back up.
>"So what do you-"
"I aggressively shitpost. How about you?"
>Wallflower slowly nods.
>"Same. That's why I said...Do you ever, uh-"
"Post dick pics? Totally. It's always a surefire way to derail a thread or just to have some fun."
>Wallflower shuffles in place for a moment.
>"I-I'm not sure if it was you, but I might have saved one of those pictures."
>Now this was a surprise.
>She may have already seen your junk before the two of you have done anything.
>You think of all the threads you made and-
>No.
>No way.
>You lean back against the counter as you grin.
"You never put a picture of yourself in one of these threads, did you?"
>She flinches before nodding.
"Did you leave the picture along with a post telling me the same thing you said outside the bathroom?"
>Your grin goes full shit-eating as she starts to shrink in on herself.
>"Um. I would need to see the post again and-"
>You nod as you pull out your phone.
"I don't have the full post, but I have the pic."
>Wallflower chokes on air for a moment as your grin advances to cheshire levels.
>"You saved it?!"
>You nod as you pull the picture up.
"I only saved two from that thread. Yours because it was the only one that looked washed, and another one from some blue crusty chick that needs to see a doctor."
>You tilt your head as you look at the phone.
"I look at hers whenever I want to get out of class. Spew chunks everytime. Hey, aren't you on the yearbook thingy? I feel like your photography skills should be better."
>The phone is snatched from your hands, allowing you to get a pizza cutter.
>"That has nothing to do with-oh my God, that's actually mine! I can't believe we've seen eachothers bits but haven't seen eachother naked yet!"
>Huh
>You've masturbated to her before you met her.
>And you're willing to bet she did the same.
"We can fix that."
>Wallflower blushes.
"But more importantly, we have some serious potential here, Blushy."
>She shakes her head as you make the first cut.
>"What do you mean?"
>You grin as the blade digs into the dough once again.
"Think of it, Wallflower. Two shitposters dating eachother? We could take a picture of you licking the tip of my dick, with the rest of it in between two pieces of bread. Then we'd make a post about how I made you a sandwich."
>"You-"
"Then we could take a picture of my head jammed between your thighs. The post would say something about how forward you are and how you made me a sandwich this time."
>"That's-"
"And if we're feeling especially mean, we can post a picture of the two of us cuddling. The post would say something about how they would never have this."
>"That hits a little too close to home."
>You put the pizza cutter down and turn around.
"Yeah, that is kind of cruel. So do you want to do it?"
>"Do you mean sex or..."
"Well I meant shitposting as a couple, but that would include sex, so yes."
>She shifts in place for a moment as a small war is waged within her.
>"We could get banned."
"It would be worth it."
>"What if someone recognizes us?"
>You wave dismissively.
"Body paint's a thing."
>The internal struggle increases so you decide to lend a hand.
"What's actually bugging you about this?"
>She shuffles for a moment before looking at you.
>"I guess I just don't like the idea of other girls, well, seeing you like that."
>You smile as you move to embrace Wallflower.
>She's tense, but a moment of holding her helps relieve that.
"Then they won't."
>"I just-"
"Sssshhh, no talking, only pizza now."
>You start to pull her towards the pizza.
>"Do you still want to shitpost together?"
>You stop next to the pizza and let her go.
"Of course! I think we should have Taco Belle and shitpost for our next date. It'd be like shit was spewing from our fingers and anus'."
>Wallflower picks up a slice of pizza.
>"That sounds stupid."
>You grab one of yours.
"I didn't hear a no."
>She picks a mushroom off the top of her slice and pops it in her mouth with a smile.
>"That's because I wasn't giving you one."