- I caught my sister masturbating once... that was an interesting evening.
- I was sitting in my room brainstorming a new novel idea and I could faintly hear the sound of something knocking against my wall, "Nahh, couldn't be" I thought as I tried to ignore it and get back to my work, eventually curiousity got the better of me and I crept out of my room, turning my handle ever so slightly as to not alert her to my snooping causing her to stop whatever she was doing on the off chance that she was playing the one-girl orchestra.
- So I tip-toed across the landing, placing my feet very carefully on the nails of each floorboard to prevent any squeaking, then as I got to her door I thought to myself "Better not try the handle just in case it's locked, I might miss my chance", instead I do what any respectable previous player of Splinter Cell would do and whipped my phone out, then put it on silent to prevent any camera noises, switched it to video mode, it record and placed it just below the gap of the door, then held it there for a few seconds, all the while this knocking was going on, then, confident that I had jiggled the phone around enough angles to be certain that I'd captured something, I slowly bought myself back onto my feet, re-checked my phone was still silent, went into my video folder and checked out the footage.
- Sure enough there she was on her bed with her laptop, pants off, legs spread wide rubbing her clit like aladdin and his magic lamp, her desk knocking against my wall as her knee pressed against it, her body convulsing as she panted into her pajama sleeve, whatever she was watching was muted.
- "Wow little sis..." I thought to myself "You never think they're capable of it until you see it.. this is actually kind of hot... but it would devastate her if she knew I knew. I'll take it to my grave."
- So with that I flipped the screen down on my phone and started creeping away, just as I was about 4 steps away from my room my sister opens her door and catches me, my facial expression was the kind you'd find on a priest caught in a nursery.kindergarten toilet, that "Oh fuck! Now I know you what you're thinking...." look, instantly she bursts into tears and runs back into her masturbation dungeon, I was now faced with a dilemma, on one hand I could non-nonchalantly walk away and pretend it never happened, treat her as I normally do and make her think she was wrong about my finding out, on the other hand I could go talk to her... knowing my sister and how headstrong she is I was certain that left to her own devices if I went down stairs for a cup of tea she'd have had ample time to fasten her scarf into a noose and commit suicide by hanging herself off of her ceiling fan, so I took a deep breath, told my boner to stop it and went to knock on her door.
- So I came to her door, I put my ear to the wood first to check the mood, I heard sounds of frantic crying and what sounded like angry shoving around/kicking of objects, with another deep breath I knocked on her door.
- "Sue, can I come in?"
- "NO! GO AWAY! i CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!"
- "Well shit" I thought to myself "If you knew what wank-fu was neither of us would be in this situation", so I tried again "Sue would you just let me talk to you? Don't be such a baby, everyone gets caught sooner or later, you know who caught me the first time? DAD. now how embarrassing do you think that was? Thats the last time I watched porn with both headphones on that's for sure"
- I heard her shuffle around and stop crying for a second, so I continued "now I have to have the same conversation with you as he had with me, call it tradition, it may as well be, can I come in?"
- With that I heard the lock barrel shift, then a moment later she said "If you have to... if you make it sound like a PSA I don't want to hear it"
- So, I went in, there was sitting on her bed looking understandably quite devastated, her cheeks red from crying and her room in disarray after her fit of embarrassment induced rage, I knew I was in a sensitive situation so I do did what any big brother would do and got straight to the point.
- "You need to be more discreet while masturbating."
- Her face was half confusion, half disgust at what I just said, and she looked about ready to throw me out of her room.
- "Hear my out... You're not some kind of freak just because you flick the bean, EVERYBODY masturbates, I do, you do, so do your friends, your classmates and your teacher almost certainly does more than any of us... what you don't know is that to avoid getting caught there's of golden rules"
- She was looking at me like I was a mad hatter trying to pour her a cup of bullshit, but I remained steadfast and continued on with the passed-down rant
- "one, never assume you're a ninja, you can be seen and heard, always lock your door, always do it on your bed and always be concious of the sounds you're making, a good way to muffle the sounds is doing it under the sheets"
- "Eww! gross Mark! Shut up!", she pushed me with her hand and I looked down at it and smirked, she whipped it away and joined her hands in her lap
- "Two, always wash your hands afterwards, alcohol gel works fine, and finally three, the most important rule, nobody wants to hear it, but if they do, they don't fucking care! Mom and dad might have to say or do something out of parental obligation but if it's just us in the house, crank that shit up and go nuts, I couldn't care less as long as you're happy, you could walk around in the nude for all I care, just do me a favor and don't beat yourself up over this, I'm partly to blame too, I should have just banged on your wall or something... well thats it I guess"
- She sat open mouthed at the last statement, like the weight of the world had been lifted, with that I got up and walked out of her room, pausing at the doorframe to say "By the way, you'd have better luck if you stretched your legs out straight and curled your toes when you do it", then I step of down the corridor chuckling to myself as I went to make that cup of tea.
- Later she comes downstairs in her pyjamas and says to me "It's... cool that you're fine about what you heard"
- "What I saw too" I thought to myself, smiling as she talked, "No problem, we're all animals." I said as I flicked through the channels on the TV, she sat down on the sofa and looked over at me sitting in the armchair, then looked down and said "Can I ask you something?", I looked over at her, then back towards the TV and said "Shoot", She fidgeted for a moment then she said "I" before hesitating, I looked back over at her and smiled, then said "Just ask, the worst I can say is no right?", she looked down at her hands again and said "It's not an asking question, just a question", Picking up my tea I said "Look, if it's about earlier just ask, you can't embarass me, I masturbate more than anyone else on the planet, I've been single for 4 years already, there's no shame in it anymore because I've given up giving a shit what people think, just ask".
- With that slight tinge of disgust in her eyes with a hint of admiration at my honesty, she continued.
- So she hesitates again before garners the courage to break her question down into a series of build-up questions, she clasped her hands together and crossed her legs on the sofa before putting them into her lap, then slowly started quizzing me, "... You know how you said you didn't care if I was loud?"
- "mhmm" I uttered, my eyes fixed on the TV as to not intimidate her into bottling out
- "... And how you said you do it to?"
- "... and you know how you said you haven't had a girlfriend in 4 years?"
- "Aww shit" I thought to myself "Well there it goes, she's about to ask what every pervert wants to hear", but I remained neutral in my poker-face, bored expression, eyes still fixed on the TV.
- "Yeah well... did you ever do it with her?"
- "... Do what?"
- "... you know! Do it... with her..."
- "You mean sex?"
- "NO! I mean ye----ugh... DID YOU EVER TOUCH YOURSELF WITH HER!? DID YOU WATCH HER!?"
- I looked over at her flustered expression, and decided to just keep going with my blunt honesty
- "Would you please calm down? It's nothing to get embarrassed out, and yeah, loads of times, we did everything, probably some things that mom would probably be grievously disappointed in should she ever have found out, could you get to the point?"
- She took a moment to compose herself, her body language shifting with every thought that passed through her hormone riddled brain, before folding her arms and looking away and saying "Do you know if she ever... arrived?"
- "You mean, did she cum?"
- She looked at me before begrudgingly saying "Yeah..." as if she knew what my response would be. "Yeah" I replied "Many times, she was so horny she came if so much as blew on it, why? is this about what I said before coming downstairs?"
- She fixed her eyes on to mine and asked with point-blank, no bullshit tone in her voice "If I steal mom's car after drinking a fifth of vodka, can I give mod reps too?"
I caught my sister masturbating
a guest Aug 26th, 2011 156,889 Never
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