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Jan 23rd, 2020
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  1. general - turn the music up a bit (good bgm choice btw) and game audio up a bit more, didnt even notice it had bgm when i watched it on my phone
  2. 0:01 - sets up for a billie eilish joke, so just insert "duh" after the bad guy
  3. 0:03 - cut straight the the lighted renders instead of showing the whole transition. just look at any one of my smash videos for reference.
  4. 0:09 - if youre going to have a montage, not boosting the game audio makes it feel like there's something missing, so pls boost that
  5. 0:12 - audio cuts out too early from previous clip, l cut it properly
  6. 0:34 - since there isnt any commmentary, keyframe the game audio to be louder. this is a general rule i do in all videos. allow the volume to dictate what the viewer needs to focus on.
  7. 0:35 - lack of l cut audio
  8. 0:40 - lack of l cut again, pls be consistent on this
  9. 0:42 - game audio up since no commentary then keyframe down when commentary comes back in
  10. 0:58 - cuts into the clip mid-sound effect, sounds strange. it's better to cut WITH a hit, rather than against one. also, turn up the game audio when im not talking
  11. 1:09 - since the game faded to black, fade from black when you return to game visuals
  12. 1:14 - turn up game on warlock punch sfx
  13. 1:19 - same with fsmash ^
  14. 1:21 - instead of cutting into the wind up of fsmash, just cut on the sound effect of it hitting, it'll make the transition stronger.
  15. 1:34 - "well that wouldve been cool, right?" there isnt any context so the people might not know what i went for
  16. 1:47 - general rule for this video, but pls throw in some zooms here and there (this moment especially) since it feels very static and that typically isnt the direction i try to go for my content
  17. 1:55 - cut with a sound effect / cutting an empty space into an empty space is very awkward / also turn up game audio
  18. 2:09 - audio a TAD bit desynced, i react before i react in game also pls zoom in to evoke fear
  19. 2:12 - this moment HAS to be zoomed in since 90% of the screen is irrelevant
  20. 2:18 - game audio quiet
  21. 2:28 - cuts to this clip TOO Fast (but only slightly). Clip B is fine, but drag Clip A out by a few frames so it doesnt sound like im interrupting myself
  22. 2:34 - commentary a bit too early
  23. 2:37 - there's a fine balance here. it seems that you understand the frame 1 audio cuts, but you're cutting Clip A too early and it sounds like im constantly interrupting myself
  24. 2:41 - turn game audio up during the transition and dont fade to black into hard cut... also this clip has no commentary so it honestly doesnt need to be included. you can just cut straight to the shield break.
  25. 2:46 - turn up the volume on uptilt a LOT so it's a meaty transition away
  26. 3:02 - this cut takes a lot of the delivery away. cutting the music on the error supplies the comedy (music has to be loud enough to have impact) and then having it be drawn out really illustrates the extent of the failure. so this is the exception to the rule when you WANT to stretch the clip out.
  27. 3:03 - the cut in at the beginning starts with the silhouettes instead of the lightened renders. it's tricky given how smash works, but you got to put the audio a few frames ahead to get the full impact of it WITH the lighted renders. also make this sfx louder since it serves as a solid transitional point and since you cut the music in the last clip, use this loud sound to bring it back in.
  28. 3:05 - just delete the first clip and cut straight to ganon fsmashing through rebel's guard (increase sound)
  29. 3:10 - cut on hit
  30. 3:27 - fade out audio / L cut
  31. 3:29 - zoom in on balloon
  32. 3:31 - zoom in on the action
  33. 3:39 - rule of thumb: if im ever talking about something specific, pls zoom in
  34. 3:46 - audio is too early. i say "oh god" before i react in game
  35. 3:47 - l cut audio pls, turn up a bit too
  36. 3:50 - no commentary, so just delete this honestly
  37. 4:00 - yeah that was like 10 seconds of no commentary, so just delete it all. it's okay if it jumps around between games.
  38. 4:06 - Clip A's commentary is cut a bit early
  39. 4:15 - cut STRAIGHT on the sfx of down air
  40. 4:23 - Clip B's audio is fine, but it cuts out game audio too awkwardly as it cuts away from a sound effect without letting it finish
  41. 4:24 - actually, turn the game audio up a lot on the fsmash
  42. 4:36 - turn up game audio when not talking, zoom in more to make it more exciting
  43. 4:39 - weird jump cut. maybe cut clip A a bit earlier.
  44. 4:43 - L cut audio plsssssss
  45. 4:47 - awkward pause in commentary, bridge it a bit better
  46. 4:52 - clip ends very awkwardly. just end it with the commentary.
  47. 5:05 - l cutttttt, awkward consistently sounds so abrupt
  48. 5:06 - since there's no commentary for this, pls turn up game audio and music before keyframing it down when commentary picks back up
  49. 5:12 - show what happened in slow motion, black&white
  50. 5:15 - doing the above will also fix this awkward jump cut
  51. 5:19 - weird ghost frame // cuts to black for 1 frame
  52. 5:21 - turn game audio / music up pleasseeeee
  53. 5:28 - awkward cut. you dont need to show me selecting terry as it's clear when the next game starts as terry.
  54. 5:37 - l cut all audio when you have raw sfx. all sound effects should resolve off camera, but none should ever start off camera.
  55. 5:39 - just cut RIGHT on power geyser and turn the audio up
  56. 5:46 - audio up and l cut
  57. 5:55 - weird cut as the screen flashes twice between colors. maybe cut sharper between the two EX moves
  58. 6:02 - suuuuper weird cut. instead of showing two shots, just show the second one. zoom in on "nope" and zoom out for not gonna deal with that. also l cut before this clip.
  59. 6:04 - after seeing this whole segment, i see what you're going for. i think the idea is funny, but you GOTTA showcase more zooms and toy with the audio more, otherwise the spontaneous cuts feel abrupt and lazy.
  60. 6:07 - if im talkin about percent, show the percent briefly.
  61. 6:08 - awkward l cut.
  62. 6:10 - turn up game audio.
  63. 6:20 - highlight the level up better with a zoom and increased volume. little bit of a sharper cut required.
  64. 6:24 - turn up audio.
  65. 6:30 - cut right on "are you ok"
  66. 6:39 - increase game audio a lot and cut away during the red screen for comedic effect. drop out the bgm as it happens. then start it again with the next intro match screen. use the sound effect to hide the transition as stated earlier. as the cut stands, it is incredibly awkward. dont use the full intro slide as you can JUST use the sound effect of it slamming on the screen.
  67. 6:45 - this was 6 seconds of nothing. it can just be removed.
  68. 6:52 - turn game audio up on this one sfx.
  69. 6:53 - rly weird cut yet again.
  70. 6:58 - please l cut the previous clip.
  71.  
  72. I think the information presented above is the guide to make the content more on brand with more appealing presentation, so the real test of this knowledge is to see how you can apply it to the remainder of this video. I need to see improvement, so please do your best to impress me with the latter half of this video after cleaning up the intro. Before you export the next version, please ask me for the HQ outro as well as a sponsor integration that I need to drop into it.
  73.  
  74. You fixed a lot of the problems with the Mystery Dungeon video last time, so I'm sure you can do it again... but going forward, I can't afford to take this much time away to write this notes up. Please try your absolute best to emulate this style going forward. You can definitely find your own editing style within this, but I mainly have an issue with the basic fundamentals of the editing presented in this. It is very static and dry, but we need it to be a bit more chaotic and involved. Good luck and I hope these notes help.
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