frustration

12:21 AM - lozer: it's so hard not to say something i would regret
12:21 AM - lozer: you actually ruin this game for me
12:22 AM - lozer: god damn it n3
12:22 AM - wrist violin: why do i ruin it wtf
12:23 AM - lozer: i just want to play 6s in peace
12:23 AM - lozer: i just want to feel good about myself again
12:23 AM - lozer: i just want anything to be the way it was
12:23 AM - lozer: you just ruin it
12:23 AM - lozer: why are you so good
12:23 AM - lozer: why do you deny me any joy of ever playing tf2
12:23 AM - lozer: why is surf the only thing real
12:24 AM - wrist violin: lol what
12:24 AM - lozer: everything i do is just tainted by your accomplishments
12:24 AM - wrist violin: do u actually take those pugs seriously
12:24 AM - lozer: no
12:24 AM - lozer: it's just a buildup
12:25 AM - wrist violin: uhh
12:25 AM - lozer: so much frustration
12:25 AM - lozer: eventually i can't take it anymore
12:25 AM - lozer: you make me feel like the actual worst player alive
12:25 AM - lozer: you make me want to give up everyday
12:25 AM - lozer: and stop trying
12:25 AM - lozer: i never do, because i'm a competitor
12:25 AM - lozer: but the thought always goes by
12:26 AM - lozer: i just wish it was back to the old way
12:26 AM - lozer: the stress free
12:26 AM - lozer: the no pressure
12:26 AM - wrist violin: wha
12:26 AM - wrist violin: wdym
12:26 AM - wrist violin: havent i always been better than u
12:26 AM - lozer: that's not the point
12:26 AM - lozer: i'm just so tired of all of this
12:26 AM - lozer: playing against you makes me cry
12:27 AM - lozer: i just want to play a game of 6s ever in my life without you taking my fun and glory
12:27 AM - wrist violin: HOW AM I TAKING FUN AND GLORY AWAY
12:27 AM - wrist violin: IM JUST PLAYIN THE GAME
12:27 AM - wrist violin: i could see why if i was like corsa or b4nny mega sweating every pug
12:27 AM - lozer: i just don't want to play tf2 with you dude that's all it is
12:27 AM - lozer: i can't have fun around you
12:27 AM - lozer: you are too much better than me
12:28 AM - wrist violin: if u tried that pug u wouldve never died to me
12:28 AM - lozer: that doesn't matter
12:28 AM - lozer: it's not just one occurence
12:28 AM - lozer: like i said this is just a buildup of immense frustration
12:28 AM - lozer: i hate losing
12:28 AM - lozer: but more than that
12:28 AM - lozer: i hate losing to the same person in the same way for a year
12:28 AM - lozer: and being unable to stop it
12:28 AM - wrist violin: then try
12:28 AM - wrist violin: lol
12:29 AM - wrist violin: u didnt try
12:29 AM - lozer: you break me down
12:29 AM - wrist violin: when u lose to me in mge
12:29 AM - wrist violin: u dont try
12:29 AM - wrist violin: when u lose to me in quake
12:29 AM - wrist violin: u dont try
12:29 AM - wrist violin: when u get melee killed 5 times that pug
12:29 AM - lozer: it's not even about the try
12:29 AM - wrist violin: u dont try
12:29 AM - lozer: the try never matters
12:29 AM - lozer: because when i try then you try and then the result repeats itself except it's just frustraitng
12:29 AM - lozer: if i tried 100% in mge then you'd try and then it'd be the classic 20-7's
12:30 AM - lozer: if i tried 100% in quake you'd use audio and rail spam me and it'd end just the same
12:30 AM - lozer: there's just no point
12:30 AM - lozer: i cannot best you
12:30 AM - lozer: i hate it
12:30 AM - lozer: i feel like such a lame player
12:30 AM - lozer: and it's not that i never try
12:30 AM - lozer: in fact i try atleast 90% of the time
12:30 AM - lozer: but my spirit gets broken literally every day by you
12:30 AM - lozer: and i build it up every time i sleep
12:30 AM - lozer: and then it gets broken down just the same
12:31 AM - wrist violin: idk
12:31 AM - wrist violin: its just a game tbh
12:31 AM - wrist violin: just have fun with it
12:31 AM - lozer: i hate this game with all my heart and soul
12:31 AM - lozer: i wish i never started playing
12:31 AM - lozer: the only thing i remotely enjoy is surf
12:31 AM - lozer: but i don't care
12:31 AM - lozer: it's impossible to have fun in this situation
12:31 AM - lozer: i can't remove myself from this
12:32 AM - wrist violin: idk
12:32 AM - wrist violin: if u dont have fun
12:32 AM - wrist violin: why play
12:32 AM - lozer: because there is nothing more to my life
12:32 AM - lozer: this is existence
12:32 AM - wrist violin: do more school
12:33 AM - lozer: it doesn't matter man
12:33 AM - lozer: i don't dislike my life
12:33 AM - lozer: i just dislike losing
12:33 AM - lozer: but my life is losing
12:33 AM - wrist violin: so get good
12:33 AM - lozer: I TRY
12:33 AM - lozer: SOI
12:33 AM - lozer: HARD
12:33 AM - lozer: EVERY DAY
12:33 AM - lozer: EVER
12:34 AM - lozer: the amount of effort i put into getting better at tf2 and at 6s is astronomical
12:34 AM - lozer: i make progress, which is good
12:34 AM - lozer: but it never amounts to any practicality
12:34 AM - lozer: because i just am not a mentally capable person man
12:34 AM - lozer: i don't understand high level 6s or something
12:34 AM - lozer: i just can't do it
12:34 AM - lozer: something always brings me back
12:34 AM - lozer: whether it's mechanical limitation or mental
12:34 AM - lozer: every time i make the stride i give it away
12:36 AM - wrist violin: idk
12:36 AM - wrist violin: ucould be practicing hard but not efficiently
12:43 AM - wrist violin: uns
12:43 AM - lozer: ?
12:44 AM - wrist violin: lmk if u wanna mge l8r
12:44 AM - wrist violin: im hecka biored
12:44 AM - lozer: that won't be the case
12:44 AM - lozer: i can't handle that right now