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Samuraimons Session 1: SIRENT Cripple Tossing

Bigwood Sep 4th, 2012 74 Never
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  1. [16:12:46] <~Plutonis> It’s the twentieth day of winter of the 31th year of the Muromachi Period. The land is beleaguered with strife and unrest as the warlords mount their armies, readying themselves to start a war that will swallow the whole country in the flames of destruction. To make things worse, a sudden death might just have become the catalyst for such a terrifying battle. As the vassals of the Imagawa
  2. [16:12:46] <~Plutonis> rally on their main castle in Shizuoka to choose their new leader, ill winds start to gather at the sea and the north...
  3. [16:15:30] <~Plutonis> As the remaining bannermen and soldiers wait in camps outside, the Koketsuna, the Yamaguchi, the Ii and the Katsurayama are on the four best seats on the castle's throne room. The throne itself is completely empty though...
  4. [16:19:31] <~Plutonis> Yadoyama, the oldest advisor of the Imagawa enters the room accompanied by the young Hiramasa, one of the newer advisors. He adjusts the conch shell on his head while trying to adjust his bib. Have i mentioned Yadoyama is a Slowking? In any case, the elderly Pokémon walks to the center of the room. Hitomi and Atsuko are accompanied by their mother on the Koketsuna side, their father and
  5. [16:19:31] <~Plutonis> older brother being notably missing. The son of the disgraced bodyguard Mitsuwa is on the back of the room, being looked by the nobles with contempt.
  6. [16:20:21] <~Plutonis> The strange girl with a talking sword meanwhile are alongside the minor clan leaders and retainers on a more distanced part of the room...
  7. [16:22:40] <~Plutonis> "Ahem!" The Slowking clears his throat, trying to get the attention of everyone. "Ahhmm... Why we were here again?" He strokes a very long white beard before helpless turning to Hiramasa. "Young man, do you know why i called them here again?"
  8. [16:24:14] <Hiramasa> "I believe you wanted to choose a new leader from among the people gathered here." Hiramasa grins. "Or Pokemon, I suppose - it's not without precedent."
  9. [16:27:44] <~Plutonis> "Ohh, yes, yes!" He turns to the people waiting in the throne room. "Yes, we were here to choose a new Daimyo for our lands... Oh, poor lord Imagawa, to be crushed by a Pineco along with his bodyguard... And we still don't know how it got the-" He suddenly is interrupted by Lady Sakura, the 'head' of the Koketsuna family. "That already happened, Yadoyama. We must concentrate in the future
  10. [16:27:44] <~Plutonis> now."
  11. [16:29:00] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro sighs.
  12. [16:29:09] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro hangs his head down.
  13. [16:29:20] <~Plutonis> She puts her hands on Atsuko's shoulders. "That is... We already have someone who can take the burden."
  14. [16:30:22] <Hiramasa> "How bold, madam."
  15. [16:32:37] <~Plutonis> "My eldest son already shall inherit the Koketsuna house, so my young man here is a perfect candidate for the job. Say something, boy. And you too, Hitomi." The grip on Atsuko's shoulders gets a LOT more sharp.
  16. [16:34:06] <Hiramasa> "Is he a warrior or a falconer's glove?"
  17. [16:34:14] <Hiramasa> "Forgive me, it's hard to tell at the moment."
  18. [16:34:42] <Atsuko> Most people would find standing on equal footing with a senile, bearded Slowking to be rather disturbing, or at the very least, unusual. Atsuko merely gazes... Well, I guess it'd be down upon him, since Slowking aren't human-sized, but not in the condescending way, either… Before his attention’s drawn to the woman
  19. [16:34:42] <Atsuko> resting her hand upon him, a look of visible discontent growing with the rising force on the grip. “Lady Sakura, your support is appreciated, but I’m afraid with your personal investment it doesn’t hold much leverage.”
  20. [16:36:08] <~Plutonis> "Hmph, a vagabond who just happens to be Yadoyama's favorite assistant should watch his words." She then stares at Atsuko, whispering at him.
  21. [16:37:51] <Hiramasa> "A vagabond? You wound me, madam. Are you saying that I am not qualified to be here?"
  22. [16:39:23] <~Plutonis> The Slowking coughs as the noblemen from the Yamaguchi and Katsurayama both protest. "Silence, shrew! Your husband is the one who should be here!" Says the Katsurayama representative. "Not to mention that boy is barely bearded. Even a Slowpoke would be a better choice for our Daimyo..." Says the Yamaguchi representative after adding. "P-present company excluded, Yadoyama."
  23. [16:41:28] <Hitomi> Hitomi was likely not paying far too much attention...until now, anyway. You know, just enough to be aware of what's going on, and little else. Turbulent times require a good deal of thinking, and frankly anyone could have been better than that...other person. She just vowed to forget his name. Of course, such is no longer the case. "...I wouldn't be so quick to assume age is the only
  24. [16:41:29] <Hitomi> determining factor." ...And would it be any good if their dad WERE here? ...Maybe a little.
  25. [16:41:57] <~Plutonis> The Slowking just shrugs while turning to a girl who appears to be holding a somewhat notched sword. "And what does our chief Blacksmith thinks, eh sir Norio?"
  26. [16:42:38] <~Plutonis> "The chief blacksmith is that small girl?" Asks the Yamaguchi.
  27. [16:43:14] <Norio> "WAHAHAHA!  No, but that girl's fiercer with a blade than she looks!"  The sword glows in the girl's arms as NOISE bursts out from it.
  28. [16:43:57] <Hiramasa> "...I imagine there's quite a story behind this."
  29. [16:44:36] <Norio> And 'bursts' means BURSTS.  It's ridiculous how somebody so LOUD was quiet for so long.  "The boy's just fine!  He has a good FIRE in his eyes."
  30. [16:44:40] <Atsuko> "He's right. You would do equally well to be respectful of their company." Atsuko's eyes only remain in her direction for as long as her lips remain in motion before they return just as swiftly return to the matter being discussed. “That isn’t to say, however, that I have no confidence in my own capabilities…”
  31. [16:44:40] <Atsuko> “If nothing else, my travels have brought me a great deal of knowledge necessary for the maintenance and proper use of our forces.” … And then his eyes drift towards the massive outburst of volume coming from the … Crowd, is it?
  32. [16:45:29] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro cocks an eyebrow as the odd sword.
  33. [16:45:34] <~Plutonis> You really can pinpoint the booming coming from a single girl holding a friggin talking sword.
  34. [16:46:43] <Norio> "Ko-tan!  Say something too, yer ol' dad doesn't want to be the only one with SPIRIT here!  ... Or maybe he could be, but that's beside the point."  The sword wiggles around a bit in her arms.
  35. [16:46:52] * Kimura remains on the outskirts of this room, primarily as a guard, listening to the conversation from afar; he had no desire for the position of Daimyo, knowing that his clan was not known for political ambition to begin with.
  36. [16:47:24] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro merely waits patiently to learn whom he is to serve.
  37. [16:47:34] <Kokoro> Kokoro holds up the talking blade. Her expression is stony, perhaps even a bit apathetic. It's almost an I-don't-want-to-be-at-this-party-the-music-is-too-loud-my-feet-hurt-I'd-rather-be-playing-video-games expression, but not quite. She does point the sword in the direction of whoever he seems to be speaking to at that given moment.
  38. [16:47:55] <Hitomi> ...Huh. There's probably a long story, but this isn't the time. Though the words of the...sword sort of underline her point. If the little girl can wield a sword, age clearly matters...little.
  39. [16:50:00] <~Plutonis> "Ah, i see... Very well then." Yadoyama starts walking for a bit and points at one of the lower clansmen. "You... From the Hatano, right? Ken...shiro...? Or did i get your name wrong?"
  40. [16:50:08] <Kokoro> Kokor tilts her head down.
  41. [16:50:22] <Kokoro> Kokoro does, rather! She raises the sword up, bringing the point almost eye to eye with her.
  42. [16:50:50] <~Plutonis> "Quite terrible what happened to your father, so i guess you are leading his armies..."
  43. [16:50:58] <Kokoro> She promptly recites the following in a crisply deadpan voice.
  44. [16:51:02] * Kimura looks towards the Slowking that seems to be addressing him, and nods.  "You did.  Kimura Eien."
  45. [16:51:12] <Kokoro> "Do you seek a speech?
  46. [16:51:12] <Kokoro> I have nothing to say here.
  47. [16:51:13] <Kokoro> I am like a tree."
  48. [16:51:14] <~Plutonis> (Uh...)
  49. [16:51:34] <~Plutonis> (That's to Freepork's character)
  50. [16:51:35] <Norio> "Ahahaha!"  The talking sword lowers its volume now that they aren't being addressed anymore.  "Well that's just fine, just fine.  Your spirit is your own!"
  51. [16:52:09] <Kimura> ((Is Freepork or his character in here?))
  52. [16:52:19] <Ken> "I just hope I can do his name honour." He grins almost wickedly. "And Ken'ichi."
  53. [16:52:28] <Kokoro> She lowers the blade with a curt nod, giving it a light tap against the ground.
  54. [16:52:46] <Kimura> ((I'm sorry.  Feel free to ignore Kimura's speaking out of turn like a bitch."
  55. [16:52:51] <Kimura> *))
  56. [16:53:14] <~Plutonis> "Hiramasa, my boy, please ask them to serve some tea, would you? I guess our guests would like some." Yadoyama stops for a bit, staring at the void. "Yes, and some rice cookies, you know how i like them."
  57. [16:54:04] <Hiramasa> "Of course, of course. If you will excuse me, ladies, gentlemen, falconry accessories, and swords-" He bows a little, and ducks out of the room.
  58. [16:54:14] <~Plutonis> Many of the persons on the room are just bringing their palms to their faces at this point. "Oh yeah, uh, you, the one who talked without being addressed." He points at the archer. "What do you do here again?"
  59. [16:57:03] * Kimura turns towards the Slowking and bows in apology.  "My sincerest apologies, Yadoyama.  I thought you were addressing me.  I am a samurai of the Kimura clan of the forests."
  60. [17:01:30] <~Plutonis> "Ah, yes, the... Weird ones. Never come out of the forest much i think. How's the weather there for star-" He's interrupted by the then-silent Ii representative. "For all the Gods' sakes Yadoyama, are you going to draw this damn thing that much!"
  61. [17:02:50] <Hiramasa> "Tea, gentlemen?" Hiramasa picks right then to show up again, carrying a tray loaded with FAR TOO MANY rice cookies.
  62. [17:03:48] <Norio> "Ahahaha!  Many thanks, I'd enjoy a..."  The sword wiggles toward the tea then falls back toward the ground.  "Oh, right."
  63. [17:04:13] <Norio> If you listen really closely you might be able to hear the sword sobbing.
  64. [17:04:24] <Hiramasa> "Maybe if we dunked you in the teacup?"
  65. [17:04:36] <Norio> "Then I'd rust!"
  66. [17:04:42] <~Plutonis> Yadoyama munches on a rice cookie. "But what were we doing again, eh Hira-Oh yes, the choosing of the Daimyo... Let me just finish, those are really delicious!"
  67. [17:05:05] <Hiramasa> "Your life has so many sufferings in it."
  68. [17:05:13] <Norio> Sniff.
  69. [17:05:16] * Hiramasa snags himself a cup of tea and settles back.
  70. [17:05:19] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro sits down, and proceeds to take a cup of tea, taking a tiny sample to test for poison first. Once he confirms its not poisoned, he sips in silence. He does not have any cookies.
  71. [17:05:29] * Kimura takes the tea, nodding silently in thanks.  Not the talkative sort.
  72. [17:06:02] * Ken pinches the bridge of his nose and nabs a cup of tea. Keeping quiet.
  73. [17:06:14] <Atsuko> Botherer's condolences go out to the sword. But Atsuko merely bows in his seat or makes some other appropriate gesture expressing his gratitude to Hiramasa whenever he comes around. "You're far too kind."
  74. [17:06:16] <~Plutonis> Meanwhile, Lady Sakura appears to be whispering to their children...
  75. [17:08:51] <Kokoro> Kokoro's eyes linger on Atsuko for a few moments. Her mind races--too kind? Would this be a direct accusation of weakness, or perhaps an expression of suspicion. Could this tea-giving person be some sort of spy and assassin, hiding their deadly intent, their murderous plot with  the guise of excessive kindness? Her chin tilts upwards, and she opts to avoid the Tea of Fatal Friendship.
  76. [17:09:09] <Hitomi> Crazy players, grabbing tea. ...Hitomi takes some tea, and like one rice cookie, unless that's a problem or something. She does listen to those whispers too, nodding slightly.
  77. [17:14:42] <Hiramasa> "So, Yadoyama-san, have you come to a decision?"
  78. [17:15:41] <~Plutonis> "Oh, hmm... I would rather have the opinions of the others. What is yours, Hira my boy?"
  79. [17:17:00] * Ken grins widely and tries to be subtle about puffing out his chest a bit.
  80. [17:19:40] <~Plutonis> "Or yours?" He points at the pufferfish man. "Kentarou, right? Your house is known to be honourable and honest, so i guess your choice is better than most." Says the Slowking who is definetely not a good choice of character.
  81. [17:19:48] <Hiramasa> "Perhaps a daimyo a bit sturdier than the last, if we are to continue with our ball games. Two lose two in the same way...well, that seems like nothing more than carelessness." Hiramasa holds out a rice cookie behind himself - it vanishes a bite at a time before a satisfied-looking Shuppet appears, orbiting Hiramasa.
  82. [17:19:56] <Hiramasa> *to lose two
  83. [17:21:54] <~Plutonis> "Oh, hmm, so you think a Pokémari game is a good idea to choose them?" Yadoyama looks around. "Do we have a ball here? Oh, please fetch one, Hiramasa!"
  84. [17:21:55] * mitsuwa_Ichiro holds his tounge. (Non-litterally.)
  85. [17:23:05] <Hiramasa> "Should I see if I can find a Pineco?" Hiramasa is probably enjoying this more than he should.
  86. [17:24:11] <~Plutonis> Everyone stares at the young advisor. EVERYONE. Except for Yadoyama who probably didn't caught the joke.
  87. [17:24:28] * mitsuwa_Ichiro grunts annoyedly, but quietly.
  88. [17:24:37] * Hiramasa smiiiiiles.
  89. [17:24:38] * Ken sniggers slightly and attempts to cover it with a small cough.
  90. [17:24:39] * mitsuwa_Ichiro also stares at Hiramasa
  91. [17:24:41] <~Plutonis> "I don't think you can use those as ba-oh stop jesting, boy!" He bonks Hiramasa with a cane.
  92. [17:24:45] <mitsuwa_Ichiro> *glares
  93. [17:25:18] <Hiramasa> "Of course, sir."
  94. [17:25:23] * Norio would stare if not for having no eyes. At least he tries to control the BOOMING LAUGHTER's volume. Barely.
  95. [17:26:15] <Hiramasa> "In any case, I believe you were asking - Kentaro? - for his opinion."
  96. [17:27:24] <Ken> "...Ken'ichi." He corrects trying not to sound peeved and failing.
  97. [17:27:58] <Hiramasa> "Ken'ichi. Yadoyama-san asked you a question~"
  98. [17:28:49] <Ken> "...Well... Let's see..."
  99. [17:28:53] * Ken taps his chin.
  100. [17:29:18] <Ken> "It should be somebody strong. Durable. Has taken a strong hit before and lasted through it."
  101. [17:29:26] <Ken> "...Delt with loss... Preferably recently."
  102. [17:29:34] * Ken shrugs.
  103. [17:29:42] <Ken> "Don't know who fits that description though."
  104. [17:30:11] <Ken> "...Martial background wouldn't hurt either."
  105. [17:30:55] * mitsuwa_Ichiro glares, thinking that ken is teasing him.
  106. [17:30:58] <~Plutonis> "Neither do i." Yadoyama shrugs, completely oblivious to what Ken is trying to say. "Let's just go with the Pokemari. Everyone, to the court!"
  107. [17:31:36] <Hiramasa> "Fair enough. Shall I officiate, Yadoyama-san?"
  108. [17:31:41] * Ken breaks away from his coy act for a second.
  109. [17:31:54] <Ken> "Wh- Oh yes. Ehm. of course."
  110. [17:31:57] * Ken coughs.
  111. [17:33:07] <~Plutonis> And with that, everyone gets up, looking really puzzled while following Yadoyama outside. Thankfully due to the late Imagawa's obsession with the game, there is a completely intact Pokémari camp, ready for people to play! "All right! Do you know the rules of the game, Hira? It appears i have forgot them..."
  112. [17:33:52] * mitsuwa_Ichiro stands, finishing his tea, and heads to the court, and takes a seat in the audience near the front.
  113. [17:34:25] <Hitomi> ...Nnng. That's enough of this, now. "I...with all due respect, Yadoyama, playing the game that killed our previous daimyo would not be a wise decision. We shouldn't decide our daimyo on a whim during such times, and certainly not like this." It seems everyone is mad, here. At least an attempt at stopping this has to be made, even if it's no good...
  114. [17:34:42] * Norio pulls his little girl wielder toward the audience as well, clearly amused as his AHAHAHAHAing all the way shows.
  115. [17:35:21] <~Plutonis> "And do you have a better idea, young lady?" Yadoyama just tilts his head while looking at her.
  116. [17:36:59] <Kokoro> Kokoro holds the sword up to her head like a telephone, not that such a thing has been invented! In a hushed tone, she asks:
  117. [17:37:16] <Kokoro> "Father, what is this?
  118. [17:37:16] <Kokoro> Some sort of competition?
  119. [17:37:16] <Kokoro> Some prodigal game?"
  120. [17:38:23] <Hitomi> "By figuring out who is most capable. A Pokemari game wouldn't judge such a thing, as our previous daimyo was into that, and now he's dead. Words can decide that well enough, though a battle or quiz or...well, something that can decide one's competence is fine too."
  121. [17:39:02] <Norio> "Ahaha!"  The sword replies, twice as loud as the girl, "The grown-ups can't make a decision for themselves, so they're trying to FORCE someone to be daimyo!  Isn't it great?   Just sit back and enjoy the show."
  122. [17:39:10] * Kimura makes his way towards the court as well, thinking this to be a bad idea but not wanting to interject, mostly because he didn't want to be viewed as some INSOLENT INTERLOPER.  That and someone else already said it.  He just remained silently.
  123. [17:40:29] <~Plutonis> "Oho! Very well then. A quiz it is. Hiramasa, everyone! Get the Quiz booths ready!"
  124. [17:41:54] * Ken seems to panic slightly and begins rubbing his chin.
  125. [17:42:14] <Hitomi> ...Hm. Hitomi gives a few whispers to Atsuko.
  126. [17:43:09] <~Plutonis> As he says that, many servants and their Pokémon flood the former sports court and start mounting some sort of... Structure. After about thirty minutes, something that would be considered an amphitheater on other times is ready as many of the lower nobles and such fill the audience. On the middle of it there are a few individual booths and a large banner reading "WHO WANTS TO BE DAIMYO?"
  127. [17:43:09] <~Plutonis> is dangling from the ceiling.
  128. [17:43:38] * Kimura continues to watche SIRENTRY, thinking this is a bit odd.  "Do you not think that more than one task would be needed to determine the most..."  He shut up, realizing his SHAMFUL INSOLENCE once again.
  129. [17:43:39] <Hiramasa> "Well, then."
  130. [17:43:51] <Hiramasa> "What would you have me do, Yadoyama-san?"
  131. [17:45:00] <~Plutonis> "Oh, revise the questions if you please. I have half of them here so come up with the other half..." Yadoyama then gets on a central booth and picks up a conch who amplifies his voice. "GOOD EVENING SHIZUOKA CASTLE!"
  132. [17:45:35] <Hiramasa> "Yes, Yadoyama-san."
  133. [17:45:43] * Hiramasa discreetly checks over the questions.
  134. [17:46:16] <~Plutonis> The crowd starts to cheer as the participants are brought to their stalls! Ken'ichi, Atsuko and Hitomi, Ichiro, Kokoro and Norio and Ichiro are brought to their own as well as the representants of the other vassals also come to participate.
  135. [17:46:56] * Kimura is apparently goaded into participation, despite being a CRAZY FOREST MAN
  136. [17:47:15] <Kokoro> Kokoro speaks more to herself than everyone else--really, she doesn't seem to be paying attention to the events going on around her at all. She recites, "With age comes wisdom,
  137. [17:47:15] <Kokoro> Or has the world taught me wrong?
  138. [17:47:15] <Kokoro> Choose with conviction!" After a moment, she adds, "Why are you taking me here?"
  139. [17:47:34] <Atsuko> Atsuko draws near, nodding and whispering back. He's trying hard to not show his disbelief in this situation.
  140. [17:48:07] <Norio> "AHAHAHA!  Why don't you try your own hand, Ko-tan?  Maybe you're more cut out to be daimyo than these guys!"  The sword says maybe-or-maybe-not sarcastically.  Who can tell?
  141. [17:48:32] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "What?! Why am I here?! I live to Serve! Not be served!"
  142. [17:48:55] <Ken> "Wait wait. I'm not rea-" Is brought to his stall. He face cracks into an insincere smile when he notices people are watching.
  143. [17:49:09] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro grunts angrily.
  144. [17:49:24] * Kimura looks slightly confused by this entire situation; this seemed rather...different from what he'd seen in the political politics of the past, and what his family had told him with words.
  145. [17:49:26] <~Plutonis> "Yooooooooou will be served some questions!" Yadoyama takes off his shell hat, revealing a shiny black pompadour toupee.
  146. [17:50:01] <Hiramasa> "Oh dear, that means he's serious."
  147. [17:50:08] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro sighs.
  148. [17:50:46] <Hitomi> Whisper whisper. She's certainly baffled, herself, but she's much better at hiding it. It's not like this is the first time she's been witnessed to one huge joke or another.
  149. [17:51:21] <~Plutonis> "That being said, we shall choose the next Daimyo by various questions. I shall start the first round, which is just, well, questions! Your intelligence WILL be challenged by that. And the first question goes to..." He points to Kokoro and Norio! "Oh that's a difficult one. Whaaaaaaaaaaaat is...?"
  150. [17:51:26] <~Plutonis> "Your favorite color?"
  151. [17:51:45] * Hiramasa sits back, munches rice cookies, shares with Shuppet.
  152. [17:52:09] * Hitomi sighs a rather audible sigh.
  153. [17:52:37] <Norio> The sword JOLTS up.  "RED!  BURNING HOT, the color of BURNING MANLY SPIRIT!"
  154. [17:52:45] * Kimura blinks at the question.  That didn't seem to challenge intelligence to him, but hell, he wasn't the sharpest of the sharp.
  155. [17:52:55] * Ken 's smile almost splits his face as the question is asked.
  156. [17:52:58] <Ken> "...Phew."
  157. [17:53:14] <Kokoro> "I like nature's green
  158. [17:53:14] <Kokoro> Or perhaps the blossom pink
  159. [17:53:14] <Kokoro> Could it be sky's blue?"
  160. [17:53:33] <Norio> "Put both of those together and you have purple!"
  161. [17:53:39] <Norio> "... Right?"
  162. [17:54:22] <~Plutonis> "All right! That's completely right, you pass this one!" One of the other contestants, the Ii representative, starts to laugh, saying "That's too easy! Yadoyama, try me!" The Slowking then turns to him and asks. "Whaaaaaaaaat is?"
  163. [17:54:45] <~Plutonis> "The speed of an unladen Spearow?" The contestant chokes. "Y-yadoyama, i don't know!"
  164. [17:55:06] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro refuses to answer any of these foolish questions.
  165. [17:55:47] <~Plutonis> "Then you are wrong." The Slowking throws the Ii representative to the audience with a PSYCHIC BLAST.
  166. [17:56:20] * Kimura looks over, seeming unphased by the blastery.
  167. [17:56:47] * Ken chortles as the man soars.
  168. [17:57:00] * Norio CACKLES as the man soars.
  169. [17:57:08] * Ken GRUFFAWS.
  170. [17:57:14] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro just watches.
  171. [17:57:15] <~Plutonis> "All right, for the third question..." He points at Hitomi. "Whaaaaaaat is...? MY name?"
  172. [17:57:45] <Atsuko> "It would seem the consequences for failure are but a bit more severe than losing the right to rule the land..." Atsuko mused to himself as the man is ROCKET LAUNCHED away.
  173. [17:58:29] <Kokoro> "Unladen spearrow
  174. [17:58:29] <Kokoro> Fiercely, freely fly faster
  175. [17:58:30] <Kokoro> Than laden spearrows."
  176. [17:59:08] <Hitomi> Hitomi can only hope that he's remembering his name right today. "Yadoyama." She also watched him fly, and she hopes she is not the next to fly by.
  177. [18:00:28] <~Plutonis> "Oh, is it? Thanks, i forgot that." Yadoyama guffaws a bit. "Oh yes, you pass." He then turns to Kimura. "Whaaaaaat is...? The speed of an unladen... Arrow? Shot by a longbow!"
  178. [18:03:01] * Kimura knows this one instantly!  Because he arrows things!  "Twenty eight and two-tenths kilometers per second, Yadoyama."
  179. [18:03:51] <~Plutonis> "I see, that one is right!" He then turns to Ken'ichi. "Whaaaaaaat is...? The best way to have someone in your way removed?"
  180. [18:04:09] <Ken> "OH That's eas-"
  181. [18:04:14] * Ken blinks.
  182. [18:04:24] <Ken> "...Yo say excuse me and ask them politely."
  183. [18:04:26] * Ken coughs.
  184. [18:04:31] <Ken> (to*)
  185. [18:04:50] <~Plutonis> Yadoyama just chuckles a bit... And psythrows Ken out to the audience. "Wrong!"
  186. [18:05:05] <Ken> "Son of a biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii"
  187. [18:05:13] * Kimura is all blankface.
  188. [18:05:21] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro scoffs.
  189. [18:05:24] <~Plutonis> "Next one is... Hiramasa!" He points at the one person who is not even participating! "Where are the rest of my cookies?"
  190. [18:06:30] <Hiramasa> "Mostly ghost." Hiramasa holds up the empty plate. "Shall I get more?"
  191. [18:07:26] <~Plutonis> "And..." He takes a card. "Oooh, the dark card. Whoever answers this right gets both to the next round AND a month worth of rice, so everyone is free to try and answer, except the ones who answered right before." He snaps his fingers at Hira, obviously beckoning for mroe cookies.
  192. [18:07:57] <~Plutonis> "The dark card question! Here it comes!" He reads from it... "What... Is?"
  193. [18:08:14] <Hiramasa> "Keep an eye on things, Dogan." Hiramasa fetches MORE COOKIES.
  194. [18:08:23] <~Plutonis> "That's an easy one, if a bit philosophical."
  195. [18:08:38] <Ken> "..."
  196. [18:08:44] <Hiramasa> Dogan settles flatly into the chair Hiramasa had been sitting in and staaaares.
  197. [18:08:53] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "Just fling me into the audience already, Yadoyama."
  198. [18:09:12] <Ken> "...Us?"
  199. [18:09:27] * Ken says pickings pits of gravel from his hair.
  200. [18:09:32] <Kokoro> "What is, what is what?
  201. [18:09:32] <Kokoro> What is what is what is what...
  202. [18:09:32] <Kokoro> Is what is what is."
  203. [18:09:46] <~Plutonis> Ichiro is psyflung! "You are welcome!"
  204. [18:10:37] <~Plutonis> "Also you already was eliminated." He flings Ken at a tree as well, before turning to Kokoro. "And you already passed so you are not even participating!"
  205. [18:10:50] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "Thank you."
  206. [18:10:51] <~Plutonis> "Good Haiku though."
  207. [18:10:59] <Norio> "Ahahahahaha!  But you gotta give her some credit- oh, you did."
  208. [18:11:02] <Ken> "Son of a-"
  209. [18:11:04] * Norio coughs.
  210. [18:11:26] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro flies into the air, and lands back into the audience where he belongs.
  211. [18:11:59] * Hiramasa comes back with COOKIES
  212. [18:12:18] <Hiramasa> "For you, Yadoyama-san. It is the simple things in life that are best, is it not?"
  213. [18:12:32] <Kokoro> "In that case, thank you." She leans down to the sword.
  214. [18:12:32] <Kokoro> "But father, what have I won?
  215. [18:12:32] <Kokoro> Some competition?"
  216. [18:12:57] <~Plutonis> "Oh, hmm. Yadoyama, the answer is a miserable little pile of se-" FLUNG. "Holy crap! Well, i say the answer is Fourty-two-" FLUNG!
  217. [18:13:38] <Norio> "Their hearts!  I think you've won the audience's hearts!"
  218. [18:13:44] <Norio> "... Maybe."
  219. [18:13:46] * Kimura is still blankfaced.
  220. [18:14:05] <~Plutonis> The last NPC standing tries to take his shit together. "The answer is to screw you, you Slow-" Slammed into the floor three times, then flung.
  221. [18:14:42] * Ken takes a breath in through his teeth. That looked like it stung.
  222. [18:15:24] <~Plutonis> "The answer was 'It', you fools! Oh well, it appears we have one question left before the next round." He turns to Atsuko. "Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat is...?"
  223. [18:15:41] * Atsuko looks around the room, and, uhh... Oh crap, he's the only one who hasn't answered this round and still remains to answer, isn't he? Kimura, Kokoro, Norio, Hitomi... Please tell me someone else still can go for this. Damnit, he's totally heard some smart guy say soemthing before about this, umm... uhhh...
  224. [18:15:46] <~Plutonis> "My favorite food?" He asks while munching his favorite food, cookies.
  225. [18:16:07] <Ken> "OH COME ON!"
  226. [18:16:52] <Hiramasa> "The ability to quickly and accurately take the measure of an opponent is an important trait in a daimyo, you know."
  227. [18:17:46] <Hitomi> Look at them go. She can't help but be amused by this. ...And she's outwardly relieved that the question isn't rigged against them. Let's hope he doesn't accidentally nervous wreck himself out.
  228. [18:17:53] <Ken> "Well I couldn't awnser my question because-..."
  229. [18:18:09] <Ken> "grrrragh!"
  230. [18:18:18] * Ken storms away to check his wounds.
  231. [18:18:31] * Ken kicks a puppy.
  232. [18:18:48] <Atsuko> Atsuko takes note of Yadoyama's consumption. "I believe the answer lies before us all," he says, making a gesture to said cookie. If it's REALLY necessary to, he says it's whatever kind of cookie Yadoyama's eating... It was rice cookies before, right?
  233. [18:18:55] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro sits in the audience quietly waiting to see whom he has the misfortune to protect.
  234. [18:19:34] * Hiramasa waves bye to Ken'ichi-san.
  235. [18:20:45] * Kimura remains silently
  236. [18:21:48] <~Plutonis> "Oh, how did you knew that? Are you a mind reading Pokémon like me?" He looks really amazed at Atsuko's answer. "Ahum, i guess it's time for round two... Dioopadi!" He points at a wooden structure with various phrases assembled on it. "Press one of those Stunfisks on your booth if you want to answer a question from one of those categories!
  237. [18:22:58] * Kimura looks down towards the Stunfisk, then back up at the categories.
  238. [18:24:11] <~Plutonis> He points at the small boxes in the structure, each one with a phrase: "The Pen is mightier", "Catch these men!", "Words that rhyme with dog!", "Things you shouldn't put in your mouth", "Countries that end with -ansei" and "Cookie".
  239. [18:25:27] * Kimura presses a Stunfisk.  "I will take Catch these men."
  240. [18:27:09] <~Plutonis> "Catch the semen?" Yadoyama lifts an eyebrow at Kimura.
  241. [18:27:40] <Kimura> "Yes, catch the...wait...no."
  242. [18:27:42] * Ken chortle.
  243. [18:28:11] <Ken> "BWHAHA- Ow oh god my rubs."
  244. [18:28:16] <Ken> (Ribs)
  245. [18:28:26] <Hiramasa> "Yadoyama-san, this is a very serious circumstance, you know."
  246. [18:28:32] * Hiramasa siiiiips tea.
  247. [18:28:43] <~Plutonis> "Well, then you are leaving the game?" He flings Kimura out to the audience. "Bye then!"
  248. [18:28:43] * Norio wiggles uncomfortably with no ability to cover his poor daughter's ears. Doesn't stop the chortling.
  249. [18:29:05] <Hitomi> Hitomi narrowly manages to not get caught in a small laughing fit. It's been forever since she's seen good funny, and even though this situation is serious, this is pretty high tier.
  250. [18:29:18] <~Plutonis> "Anyone wants to Catch the Semen? Hiramasa?" He turns to the advisor, looking pretty serious in all this silliness.
  251. [18:29:27] * Kimura gets flung into the audience and blankfaces.
  252. [18:29:34] <Ken> "BWAHAHAHA OH GOD STOP."
  253. [18:29:47] * Ken clutches his sides.
  254. [18:29:56] <Hiramasa> "I believe I just missed it, Yadoyama-san."
  255. [18:30:04] * Hiramasa points at Kimura's rapid exit.
  256. [18:30:32] <Kokoro> "Father, what sea-men?
  257. [18:30:32] <Kokoro> I see no men, nor ocean.
  258. [18:30:32] <Kokoro> Indecisive kids."
  259. [18:31:42] <~Plutonis> "Anyone else taking a question?"
  260. [18:31:44] <Norio> "Don't... don't worry about it.  I could cut a sea-man in two, anyway!  Ahaha... ha!"
  261. [18:32:02] <Norio> "Okay, Ko-tan, SLAM ME DOWN!  I want to try one!"
  262. [18:33:59] <Kokoro> Kokoro does exactly that. She chops the nearest one with her sword.
  263. [18:34:08] <Norio> THIS KILLS THE STUNFISK
  264. [18:34:23] <Norio> "Give me THINGS YOU WOULDN'T PUT IN YOUR MOUTH!  I know the answer to this one!"
  265. [18:34:57] <~Plutonis> 1d20 Static
  266. [18:34:58] <DiceMaid-9001> Plutonis, Static: 2 [1d20=2]
  267. [18:35:06] <~Plutonis> 1d20 dying thundershock
  268. [18:35:06] <DiceMaid-9001> Plutonis, dying thundershock: 12 [1d20=12]
  269. [18:35:15] <Norio> hahahaha oh wow
  270. [18:35:39] <~Plutonis> Kokoro and Norio are electrocuted by a sudden jolt of electricity!
  271. [18:35:51] <Norio> "FEELS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD"
  272. [18:35:52] <~Plutonis> 1d12+16 damage :3
  273. [18:35:53] <DiceMaid-9001> Plutonis, damage :3: 19 [1d12=3]
  274. [18:36:09] * Ken stops dead. He stares for a few moments...
  275. [18:36:21] <Ken> "...Snrk...Snrk....hahah...hahah...hahahahaha!"
  276. [18:36:54] <Kokoro> "Wah guh aaah owwie!
  277. [18:36:54] <Kokoro> Zakaka ooh what is this
  278. [18:36:55] <Kokoro> Have I been murdered?"
  279. [18:36:59] <~Plutonis> "Don't chop the buzzers! Yadoyama admonishes the father/daughter duo as he opens the question. "Should you put a sword on your mouth?"
  280. [18:37:35] <Norio> "Ahahaha!  Not until it's cooled down!"
  281. [18:39:20] <~Plutonis> That's riii-oh come on, that's not even close. Yadoyama flings Kokoro and Norio to the audience!
  282. [18:39:37] <Hiramasa> "Oh my."
  283. [18:39:38] <Norio> "WAAAAA AT LEAST LET US TAKE OUR SASHIMIIIIIIIIIIIII"
  284. [18:39:57] <~Plutonis> "All right, whoever is left then?" He flips a finger and sends the dead stunfisk flying into Kokoro's face.
  285. [18:40:08] <Norio> "Nice catch!"
  286. [18:40:11] * Hiramasa looks around. Who else is left?
  287. [18:40:17] * Norio gives a sword thumbs up.
  288. [18:40:34] * Kimura notices the sword not having thumbs.
  289. [18:40:40] <Norio> Exactly.
  290. [18:41:58] <Kokoro> "Have I lost? Father...
  291. [18:41:58] <Kokoro> You have just failed me once more.
  292. [18:41:58] <Kokoro> Your shocking mistake."
  293. [18:42:14] <Kokoro> She's too preoccupied reciting her haiku to notice the stunfisk slapping her face.
  294. [18:42:29] <Norio> "HAHAHA!  Don't worry, it would've been boring anyway!"
  295. [18:42:45] * Kimura watches in silence.
  296. [18:43:13] <~Plutonis> Atsuko's buzzer suddenly plays as his hand is telekinetically controlled! "Oh we have one of our last two contestants!"
  297. [18:43:27] <~Plutonis> "Pick your question, young man! Now."
  298. [18:44:05] * Atsuko looks around, is it just him and Hitomi left? "... I would assu-Well, that confirms my assumption... I suppose I'll take..."
  299. [18:44:07] <Atsuko> 1d4
  300. [18:44:07] <DiceMaid-9001> Atsuko, 1d4: 2 [1d4=2]
  301. [18:44:49] <Atsuko> "Words that rhyme with 'dog' for one chance at becoming the Daimyo, please, Lord Yadoyama."
  302. [18:45:46] * Hiramasa flumps over in his chair.
  303. [18:47:16] <~Plutonis> "All right then..." A question flips over in the stall. "What are the exact climatic conditions needed for fog to be formed in a swamp environment in winter?"
  304. [18:47:35] * Kimura is consoled on his loss by a Vulpix that is OUT OF ITS APRICORN FOR NO REASON GOD
  305. [18:47:59] <Hiramasa> Suddenly, Hitomi's stunfisk goes off!
  306. [18:48:14] * Kimura would totally know that question, too!
  307. [18:48:54] <~Plutonis> "Okay, you!" He points to Hitomi. "What are you picking?"
  308. [18:48:56] <Atsuko> Okay, that's just... WHY? Atsuko thinks for all of a brief moment... Surely some smart person he came across had said something of this sort...
  309. [18:49:13] <Atsuko> 1d20+2+1 YES I am using a feat to help me with this trick question!
  310. [18:49:14] <DiceMaid-9001> Atsuko, YES I am using a feat to help me with this trick question!: 16 [1d20=13]
  311. [18:49:45] <Norio> "HA!  The kids always get the fun ones," bellows a loud voice from the audience.  Wonder who that could be?
  312. [18:50:09] <Hitomi> Hitomi takes the moment to pretend she hit that buzzer. "I'll take The Pen Is Mighter." That was for a choice of category, right?
  313. [18:50:22] <~Plutonis> "The Penis Mightier?"
  314. [18:50:39] <Ken> "HAH! PENIS!"
  315. [18:51:07] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro rolls his eyes.
  316. [18:51:20] * Kimura blinks, not getting the joke still.
  317. [18:51:23] <Hiramasa> Hitomi's Stunfisk starts flopping about.
  318. [18:52:55] <Hitomi> "...Pen. Is. Two words. Though I suppose if there's a question for that, I might as well attempt to answer that one." ATTEMPT TO PRESERVERE.
  319. [18:53:34] * Norio swordwhistles. "That kid had some GUTS!"
  320. [18:54:56] <Kokoro> Persevere. Silly Shuku.
  321. [18:54:57] <Hitomi> Or that. Whatever.
  322. [18:54:57] <Plutonis> "Hmm. I see then." A tablet flips for Hitomi as well. "How many pages does a book need to block a sword attack?"
  323. [18:54:58] <Atsuko> And then... A flash of rememberance! "It would demand a humidity exceeding 70 percent, alongside a temperature below two degrees celsius..." The crazy old men you meet on the road. Who even KNOWS these things in that timezone? (God I love this feat already.)
  324. [18:55:00] <~Plutonis> "Correct!" A bell rings at Atsuko as Yadoyama claps his hands, looking at Hitomi expectantly.
  325. [18:55:05] <Hiramasa> The Stunfisk suddenly stops moving as Hiramasa sits up again, all casual-like.
  326. [18:57:46] <Hitomi> Sadly, she does not have a feat for this. She'll be damned if she doesn't try, though!
  327. [18:57:56] <Hitomi> 1d20+3
  328. [18:57:57] <DiceMaid-9001> Hitomi, 1d20+3: 9 [1d20=6]
  329. [18:59:28] <Hitomi> 1d20+3 Hitomi tries harder.
  330. [18:59:29] <DiceMaid-9001> Hitomi, Hitomi tries harder.: 18 [1d20=15]
  331. [19:03:13] <Hitomi> In fact, it's exactly twice as hard!
  332. [19:03:36] <Hitomi> She ponders harder. "....207."
  333. [19:05:13] <~Plutonis> He flips an eyebrow. "You are right, but..." Yadoyama looks a bit lost. "Huh, i didn't planned what would happen if you got so far. Hiramasa, do ya have any ideas how to solve this draw?"
  334. [19:05:54] <Norio> "HEY!  HEYYYYY!"  A BOOMING voice yells from the audience.  "Have the kids DUEL for it!"
  335. [19:06:42] <Hiramasa> "Hmm."
  336. [19:06:46] <Hiramasa> "A very interesting question."
  337. [19:06:48] <Kokoro> "I have a solution."
  338. [19:06:59] <Hiramasa> "Perhaps if one of them were to voluntarily cede power?"
  339. [19:07:09] <Kokoro> "Shh."
  340. [19:07:26] * Norio just wiggles.
  341. [19:08:26] <Hitomi> "I would not be opposed to ceding power to Atsuko, if that's alright."
  342. [19:08:35] * Kimura finally gets the semen thing.  "Oh, it was a joke!"
  343. [19:08:43] <Norio> "BOOOOOOOO!"
  344. [19:08:51] <~Plutonis> "Having brother and sister fight is a bit cruel, Sir Norio." Yadoyama just tilts his head. "Oh well, there we have it!"
  345. [19:08:57] * Atsuko looks to the person to his ... Right, is it? Or left? Does it really matter she's next to him anyways. "Is such a thing necessary?" Addressing the sword. "Considering my sister and I are, well, brother and sister..." But then he shuts up when Hitomi starts to speak.
  346. [19:09:20] <Hiramasa> "Congratulations, Daimyo-san. I shall, of course, remain your humble servant." Deeeeeep bow.
  347. [19:09:23] <Norio> "They could've done it with bokken!"
  348. [19:09:26] * Norio swordpouts.
  349. [19:09:52] <Kokoro> "No."
  350. [19:10:14] <Kokoro> "I refuse to acknowledge the authority of the Daimyo without rightfully earning the title. There is one solution."
  351. [19:10:20] <Hitomi> "Oh hush. We can always spar some other time if you want to watch. Our new daimyo needs to keep sharp, after all."
  352. [19:10:31] <Kokoro> "A competition.
  353. [19:10:31] <Kokoro> A witty challenge of minds.
  354. [19:10:31] <Kokoro> The Haiku duel."
  355. [19:10:37] * Kimura bows to the new Daimyo.  "Congratulations, sir."
  356. [19:11:06] <Hiramasa> "Miss, I don't believe the decision is yours to make."
  357. [19:11:09] * Norio bobs up and down slightly, like a nod. "That's a good point! Wouldn't we WANT a Daimyo who can write a haiku?"
  358. [19:11:20] <~Plutonis> Many people in the audience start to clap and cheer for Atsuko, while some of the former contestants and their followers just stay silent, some of them leaving the place with anger.
  359. [19:12:50] <~Plutonis> As the dust settles and the pseudo amphitheater is dismantled, the ceremony of Daimyo appointing starts in the throne room...
  360. [19:12:52] <Kokoro> Kokoro nods to Hiramasa. "Very well, then. Good day. I encourage you to continue refraining from making use of the mental faculties you've been granted and to blindly follow."
  361. [19:13:08] <~Plutonis> (It's a good opportunity for you guys to interact a bit)
  362. [19:13:29] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro finally stands up and walks over to the new Daimyo.
  363. [19:13:49] <Hitomi> "To be quite honest, a haiku duel is rather...unfitting for this." Count dem syllables.
  364. [19:14:22] <Hiramasa> "Your meter is slipping, my dear."
  365. [19:14:29] * Hiramasa nods back to Kokoro.
  366. [19:14:48] * Kimura gets up and looks around, seeing that his task here is nearly done, walking to the others and bowing.  "Well, then.  If there is nothing more I am needed for."
  367. [19:15:13] <Norio> Not the same effect if it isn't multiple lines.  "Either of 'em woulda worked fine, if they're from the same blood!"  The sword nudges its holder.  "Do a haiku duel sometime later!"
  368. [19:15:35] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro bows deeper than thought possible to the new Daimyo Atsuko.
  369. [19:15:40] * Hiramasa heads back inside, staff jangling as he goes.
  370. [19:15:56] <Kokoro> "That was not a haiku. I am capable of not speaking in the form of poetry. Please do not mistake yourself for clever on account of the fact I opted not to do so. If you wish me to explain my point in haiku format, so be it."
  371. [19:15:58] <Atsuko> Atsuko doesn't seem to be all too responsive to the applause and everything, just... Staring off into the distance a short bit. This is... Interesting, to say the least, as he mulls over just how he ended up becoming the daimyo in, well... The most unusual manner. But come the time for the ceremony, he's at least presentable and ready to receive. He returns
  372. [19:16:26] <Atsuko> the gesture to... Does he prefer Mitsuwa or Ichiro, Omega? ... Well, guess it doesn't matter for narrative thought. (Hold a sec)
  373. [19:16:28] <Kokoro> Kokoro coughs and addresses Hiramasa.
  374. [19:16:37] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> (Either works.)
  375. [19:16:37] <Kokoro> "You are mindless sheep.
  376. [19:16:37] <Kokoro> Follow blindly, question not
  377. [19:16:38] <Kokoro> Leaders you worship."
  378. [19:17:10] * Norio adjusts himself to be slung over the girl's shoulder. "AHAHAHA! You tell 'em!"
  379. [19:17:15] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "Koketsuna Atsuko, I live to serve. If you will accept my service as your protector."
  380. [19:17:22] <Kimura> /me heads inside to witness the ceremony, again bowing to Atsuko.  "Again, I provide
  381. [19:17:44] <Kimura> much congratulations to you
  382. [19:17:48] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> *Daimyo Koketsuna Atsuko
  383. [19:17:56] <Kimura> for your ascension
  384. [19:18:39] <Hiramasa> "On the battlefield, the flags left to burn may not make undue complaints~"
  385. [19:19:53] <Hiramasa> "One must show grace in defeat as well, Kokoro-chan."
  386. [19:21:22] <Norio> "Eh, how they're decided doesn't really matter," the sword gives a pseudo-shrug.  "Might as well celebrate!"
  387. [19:21:36] <Atsuko> "I would be most honored to have you in my service," he says to Mitsuwa... And damnit he's got multiple people to talk to at once doesn't he? Bother not good with quick response as Atsuko addresses Kimura. Hold on wordthoughtsincoming
  388. [19:22:26] <Kokoro> "Defeat? So you claim.
  389. [19:22:26] <Kokoro> Yet ruling is not for I
  390. [19:22:26] <Kokoro> The most fit should rule."
  391. [19:22:53] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro bows. Thank you my lord. I shall protect you with my life, and I shall begin my duties immediately."
  392. [19:23:19] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro looks around, aura checking for anyone potentially hostile to the new Daimyo.
  393. [19:23:31] <Kokoro> Kokoro tilts her head--she didn't even know what the competition she was forced into was ABOUT at first. Being as antisocial as she is, the idea of ruling over people is quite repulsive to her. She adds, "I merely wish to see that the ruler between two candidates be the more intellectually fit of the crop."
  394. [19:23:59] <Norio> "Speaking of which, Ko-tan!  Leave the advisor be for now- Why don't we go meet the new Daimyo's sister while everyone's busy sucking up, ah?  Look how quiet she is, maybe you could make a friend!"
  395. [19:24:11] <Norio> "That way you can ASK her why she didn't want the spot."
  396. [19:24:25] <Norio> "(And maybe find out if she even knows how to write a haiku)," daddy whispers.
  397. [19:24:26] <Hiramasa> "He did last the longest, dear. The alternative was the one without ambition, and that would be the death of your clan."
  398. [19:24:34] <Atsuko> To Kimura, he speaks. "Much appreciated..." He pauses but a moment. "If you would, how would you like to be referred to as?" This one is directed both towards Ichiro and Kimura.
  399. [19:24:43] <Hiramasa> "Come, Dogan, let's watch the festivities."
  400. [19:25:54] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "I am your humble servant. My name is Mitsuwa Ichiro. Call me as you wish."
  401. [19:26:11] <~Plutonis> Many servants enter the room carrying drinks and food. Yadoyama quickly gets in a partying spirit by drinking a lot of sake and eating some more of those cookies. Maybe that's the reason Slowkings have such massive guts!
  402. [19:26:14] <Hitomi> "...It is a bit off, but I've never made one of those before." She shrugs. "Though I figured you were stuck in poem-speak. Weirder things happen. Swords talk, and whatnot. That said, congratulations on your new position, Atsuko." A bow to her new leader and all!
  403. [19:27:05] * Hiramasa drinks tea, not sake. IS A PRIEST etc
  404. [19:27:05] * Kimura looks towards Atsuko.  "Eien will be sufficient, Atsuko-sama."
  405. [19:28:00] <Kokoro> "Perhaps you spend your time in the forest, like myself, though I must call to your attention that I am not a deerling, but am in fact a human being." The girl, by all accounts, seems to be quite serious in her belief that she's being referred to as a Normal/Grass pokemon via the term "dear."
  406. [19:30:14] * Norio gives another metaphorical-only shrug and swings himself toward the ground lightly, resting while the blade points at the little purple girl. "THAT'S its own story! I'm the local blacksmith, and lost my body when I tried TOO HARD making THE BEST sword in the world! And now I am that sword! Funny how fate works, isn't it?"
  407. [19:30:19] <Atsuko> "Eien, Mitsuwa... I am looking forward greatly to making this land great and prosperous alongside the both of you..." A gentle smile emerges upon Atsuko's face.
  408. [19:33:08] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro nods.
  409. [19:33:16] * Kimura nods in agreement with the statement, saying nothing else.  His strange, almost antisocial behavior was normal for those of the Kimura clan.
  410. [19:37:03] <~Plutonis> Suddenly, the doors of the throne hall open with a thunderous slam! Limping inside the room are a wounded sailor and a bloodied soldier! "Where... Where is our lord Daimyo?" The soldier beckons while trying to carry the sailor inside. "Gah! The bastards got us hard..."
  411. [19:38:42] * Norio would DBZface if not for the fact of having no face. "Now THIS is getting interesting!"
  412. [19:40:16] <Atsuko> WHELP, so much for having a good time. Atsuko draws forth, towards their wounds. "Someone bring forth medical assistance!" He makes seeing to their not-dying-ness a priority.
  413. [19:40:39] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro follows Atsuko, ready for anything.
  414. [19:42:25] * Kimura is not great at the medical thing, but pays attention so that he knows who and what the problem is.
  415. [19:43:11] <~Plutonis> Yadoyama and some medics try to tend the sailor, but the soldier just brushes them away. "My Lord!" He kneels on the ground. "We are under attack! By sea and by land, they just came up from nowhere!" He points to the sailor. "That man said his boat was attacked by pirates! They looted it and are now heading for the coast villages! And... I-i-i..." The soldier slams his face on the floor,
  416. [19:43:11] <~Plutonis> starting to babble.
  417. [19:43:43] * Hitomi follows Atsuko as well. Can't let him die, and there's apparently something deadly around. Like pirates!
  418. [19:45:14] <~Plutonis> "They sprang from the ground... They came from the Satomi clan's lands, and started to raze the villages on our borders with them..." The man looks really terrified by just remembering what the hell went on there.
  419. [19:45:27] <Hitomi> "Well, it seems you're being put to the test already, Atsuko. You know what to do, right?" He did go learn the art of war, hopefully he has a clue.
  420. [19:45:52] <Norio> "Sounds like some ACTION!  Hey, Daimyo, what're you gonna have us do?"
  421. [19:46:02] * Kimura nods a little bit, listening to the soldier, looking to Atsuko for orders on which point to attack.
  422. [19:46:34] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "You're orders, my Daimyo?"
  423. [19:46:40] <~Plutonis> (>you're)
  424. [19:47:06] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> *Your
  425. [19:47:25] <~Plutonis> "The dead... The bastards from the Satomi control the dead...! Aaaaaaargh!" The soldier starts convulsing with fear as he says that, biting his own tongue.
  426. [19:49:08] <Atsuko> Atsuko sighs. "It seems that we're already under attack from multiple fronts... And... You say they're capable of controlling the dead?" Maaan, first day of being the daimyo and already it's proving to suck. His mind begins to race, analyzing the situation as told.
  427. [19:52:11] <Hitomi> "I suppose burning the dead wouldn't leave anything for them to work with."
  428. [19:56:47] <~Plutonis> Yadoyama sighs. "Hmm, yes, you have any idea for what to do, my lord? I believe that our neighbours finally got ready to take our territories, like they planned to do ever since the late lord Imagawa did." He scratches his beard. "That being said, it is your call to raise an army... And to find generals as well."
  429. [19:57:54] * Norio silently does the whole 'ooh ooh mememe' routine by jangling about in a small girl's arms.
  430. [19:58:05] <Atsuko> "We'll need to mobilize our forces, prepare our defense and push them back!" Is pretty much the first thing that comes out after any degree of thought. ... Damnit this lack of words feels--Oh there we go! "What was the status of our own forces last the late Lord Yoshimoto checked?"
  431. [19:58:06] <Norio> Or maybe she's actually tal- nah, she's asian, there's no way.
  432. [20:00:22] <~Plutonis> "Yeah, about that..." Yadoyama shrugs. "I do believe... We have only two thousand troops ready for the moment. In times of peace they were mostly used just to supress banditry and guard the most important palaces."
  433. [20:00:25] <Atsuko> "And what of the enemy's ranks? Numbers, arms, anything you noticed besides the naval attack?"
  434. [20:02:46] <~Plutonis> The sailor appears to be a bit better. "M-my lord, i could only count three ships, although one of them was enormous, the biggest one i have ever seen in my life!" He coughs some saltwater. "I think it was the Umikomori!"
  435. [20:03:33] * Kimura DBZFaces.  "The Umikomori?!"
  436. [20:03:54] <~Plutonis> Roll int or wis, y'all.
  437. [20:04:02] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> 1d20+2
  438. [20:04:02] <DiceMaid-9001> Mitsuwa_Ichiro, 1d20+2: 3 [1d20=1]
  439. [20:04:04] <Norio> "Umikomori Pshumikomori!  Command us to cut it in two already!"
  440. [20:04:07] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> nope.avi
  441. [20:04:11] <Hiramasa> 1d20+6
  442. [20:04:11] <DiceMaid-9001> Hiramasa, 1d20+6: 11 [1d20=5]
  443. [20:04:23] <Hitomi> 1d20+3 It should be noted that--nice 1--she's been taking notes this whole time.
  444. [20:04:24] <DiceMaid-9001> Hitomi, It should be noted that--nice 1--she's been taking notes this whole time.: 13 [1d20=10]
  445. [20:04:54] <Atsuko> 1d20+2 WHELP
  446. [20:04:55] <DiceMaid-9001> Atsuko, WHELP: 21 [1d20=19]
  447. [20:04:57] <Norio> 1d20+2 ha, it's the same for either
  448. [20:04:57] <DiceMaid-9001> Norio, ha, it's the same for either: 9 [1d20=7]
  449. [20:05:09] <Norio> Wait no that's +1
  450. [20:05:47] <Kimura> 1d20-3
  451. [20:05:47] <DiceMaid-9001> Kimura, 1d20-3: 16 [1d20=19]
  452. [20:07:35] <~Plutonis> Atsuko and Kimura recognize that name from some legends told among merchants. The Umikomori is the flagship of the Chosokabe clan, a bunch of scurvy pirates who control part of the small island of Shikoku. It IS the biggest naval vessel known in the entire Ransei as well.
  453. [20:09:44] * Kimura looks rather surprised, for once showing an emotion other than blankface.
  454. [20:12:31] <Atsuko> "The Ukimokori..." Atsuko mulls out loud. "The largest ship within the Chosokabe army, if not all of Ransei... Sea pirates to the south, and sorcery of the undead to the east... The question, now, is if they're connected..."
  455. [20:13:05] <Norio> "Do we HAVE time to think about it?"
  456. [20:15:24] <Atsuko> "Saving thought for this matter should indeed be saved for later... Assemble the troops! We must prepare for battle!" Though even though he said NOT to think about that, it doesn't stop him continuing to think on OTHER things as he issues the command.
  457. [20:15:53] * Kimura nods a little bit, bowing before heading off to assemble his archers.
  458. [20:16:07] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "My Daimyo, we must repel these threats at once. We can worry about the connections after we defeat them. We must show them the resolve and tenacity of Imagawa."
  459. [20:16:16] <Hitomi> "They're connected enough in that they're attacking us, seeking to finish us off while we're still in turmoil, and apparently with flair. Let's show them we're not done yet."
  460. [20:16:57] <Norio> "Ko-tan!  Let's go get some soldiers too!  Obviously they'll follow ME, I made their weapons!"
  461. [20:17:45] <~Plutonis> "My lord, wait!" Yadoyama asks some of the other strategists to put a map of ransei at a large table in the throne room. "Let me at least show the strategic overview we are facing!"
  462. [20:18:07] <~Plutonis> http://i.imgur.com/jniEg.png
  463. [20:19:25] <~Plutonis> He points at the pinkish province with a '1' on it. It appears the Chosokabe pirates are attacking the south of it, while the Satomi... Undead? Are massing on the border of the teal province with Satomi lands.
  464. [20:20:01] <Atsuko> Oh yeah, he totally isn't setting off to get slaughtered without SOME plan! What does he think, Atsuko's an idiot? He was studying the art of war for TWO YEARS! He's not THAT silly. "Much appreciated, Lord Yadoyama!"
  465. [20:21:17] <~Plutonis> "Very well, my lord. I appreciate if your lordship and the generals try to come up with a plan for both of those threats."
  466. [20:23:12] <Norio> "Lord Yadoyama, just how senile ARE you?"  The sword bellows, "If they're already dead, we just need to kill them so hard that they're PAST dead!"
  467. [20:24:10] <Hitomi> "...So who are the generals? If we have a shortage, I'll take that position.
  468. [20:25:08] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "Clan Mitsuwa is at your disposal, my Daimyo."
  469. [20:25:23] * Kimura nods.  "As is the Kimura clan."
  470. [20:26:23] <Norio> "As are my more bloodthirsty customers!  I bet there are mercenaries that've been ACHING for a fight."
  471. [20:27:49] <Atsuko> He quickly begins thinking, nodding affirmatively and appreciatively as each of his newfound subordinates... No, allies, offer their support and manpower. "The Chosokabe's naval prowess is incredible, and the Ukimokori's yet to be bested in naval combat... If we can reclaim control of the ports, we'll be able to choke off the pirates still on land..."
  472. [20:27:52] <Atsuko> More thoughts incoming.
  473. [20:28:47] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro looks at the map for any passes or valleys that the invaders must pass through.
  474. [20:29:04] <Norio> "So, Missy," The sword scrapes over to Hitomi's direction, "You're going to fight too?  THAT'S why you turned down the position?"
  475. [20:31:38] <Hitomi> "I turned down the position simply because Atsuko is more capable than I am. I certainly wouldn't mind fighting, though."
  476. [20:33:03] <Norio> "A girlie like you, huh?  Your brother looks like he's got passion but couldn't hurt a fly, what kinda trick's up YOUR sleeve?"
  477. [20:34:04] * Kimura begins quoting an old proverb passed down his family!   "To ignore the Magikarp is to face the Gyrados."
  478. [20:36:59] <Hitomi> Hitomi's answer is to pull out a really, really small charm, which erupts in a short lived, yet flashy inferno. "Setting people on fire, electrocuting them, so on."
  479. [20:37:30] <Norio> "Ah!  HahahaHAHAHAHA!  That really IS some trick!"
  480. [20:37:50] <Atsuko> ... Oh right, there were supposed to be more thoughts following that first one. ... Unfortunately, BOTHERER has no idea, so, uhh... DID Mitsuwa pull up anything looking at the map?
  481. [20:38:02] <Norio> SOME LEADER YOU ARE
  482. [20:38:30] <Atsuko> Hey, ATSUKO's competent!
  483. [20:38:34] <~Plutonis> "Hm... What about the Satomi invaders, my lord?"
  484. [20:40:47] <Hitomi> "It's more than a trick, but it's certainly something."
  485. [20:41:18] <Atsuko> "A reminder of the terrain of the lands to the east..." Waiting on information to be relayed to him through most likely Mitsuwa.
  486. [20:41:26] <~Plutonis> "Reports do say they are regrouping at a village in the border, probably digging up some corpses..."
  487. [20:41:55] <Norio> "Ha!"  Scrape scrape.  "Someone who can do THAT is better off where they can put it to use than sitting around planning strategies anyway- why didn't you just mention you could do that in the FIRST place?"
  488. [20:41:59] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "How soon until we can have troops arrive to that village?"
  489. [20:43:53] <~Plutonis> Yadoyama shudders to think. "The Satomi's necromancy is well-known around the country, but to think they can make entire armies... That village is half an hour away from here, and it would take an hour to rally and gather the troops."
  490. [20:44:32] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "They're not rallied and gathered already?!"
  491. [20:45:19] <~Plutonis> (Talking about equipping them for battle, unless you guys want to charge in blind!)
  492. [20:45:31] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> (Ooooh. Ok.)
  493. [20:45:35] <~Plutonis> (Also dividing in squads)
  494. [20:46:23] <Hitomi> "...We best take care of them quickly. With the power to make the dead do as they please, I doubt they'll have problems with making more of them."
  495. [20:47:18] <Hitomi> "And I didn't really see the need to announce I can shoot fire from my hands. Not to mention if he was somehow disqualified, I'd have to attempt to take the seat myself anyway."
  496. [20:47:58] <Norio> "Can he do it too?"
  497. [20:50:13] <Hitomi> "No." Her answer is notably sharp. One can't help but wonder why. He definitely knows why.
  498. [20:50:53] <Norio> "Then that explains it all!  It's better off this way!"
  499. [20:51:02] <Norio> "I bet he could write a haiku too, anyway."
  500. [20:53:04] <Atsuko> "Atsuko looks at the map. "The village is closer, so taking care of the zombies should be our priority..." Going off the assumption Mitsuwa would've relayed information about the cliff. "That said, if we can successfully maintain a defense at this point," he points to the cliff bridge, "we can allocate more of our troops to deal with the pirates."
  501. [20:53:16] <Atsuko> (Please don't hurt me if he wouldn't have I'm sorry ;_;)
  502. [20:54:06] <Kokoro> "Ah-huh?" Kokoro rubs her eyes slowly as she returns to the realm of the waking.  
  503. [20:54:08] <~Plutonis> (He probably listened to Yadoyama talk as well)
  504. [20:54:53] * Kimura never sleeps, but DavidChaos is sleepy!
  505. [20:55:02] <Hitomi> "Probably, yeah."
  506. [20:55:12] <Hitomi> ...Where'd their mother go, anyway?
  507. [20:56:01] <Norio> "GWAHAHA!  Then let's go!"  The sword pulls at its wielder's hands.  "There's nothing tough about knocking down soldiers who're already dead!"
  508. [20:56:17] <~Plutonis> She already got what she wanted, so you guys are on your own. It's war time, not politics time!
  509. [20:57:17] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "First we should send scouts, to see how many each side numbers, and what they're doing exactly. And we should do that immediately."
  510. [20:59:19] <~Plutonis> "Very well then!" He summons a bunch of scrawny soldiers. "The best runners we have... We shall send two to each of the places to gauge the enemies there!"
  511. [21:01:05] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "Yes, please hurry back."
  512. [21:01:16] <Atsuko> "Indeed. Especially since it's quite possible they could return from the village right as our troops are done with preparations..." He looks to the runners. "And take caution as you proceed!"
  513. [21:04:07] <~Plutonis> After about 35 minutes, the scouts are back, although only one of them returned from the eastern village. "The undead... They grew up in number, my lord! There are more than a thousand there!" The ones coming from the southern fishing places report: "About a thousand of the pirates are massing on beaches, my lord! They are only concerned with looting them for the moment!"
  514. [21:06:36] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "We'll need the defensive advantage."
  515. [21:07:51] <Hitomi> "At least we're not outnumbered. We should have enough soldiers to take both."
  516. [21:08:52] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro2> "We need to take care regardless. We need to minimize casualties, so we need to fight at an advantage."
  517. [21:10:44] <Hitomi> "Of course we have to be careful, especially with the village. Their power grows the longer we let them sit. At least the pirates just want to loot."
  518. [21:11:41] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro takes a crudely whittled figureine which seems to be some sort of upright being holding what looks like a spear. He sets it on the castle. "Where would you have us go, my Daimyo?"
  519. [21:16:19] <Atsuko> Atsuko stares down at the map, and the pawn as it's dropped down. "The village to the South needs the help more... We'll send twelve hundred there! The goal is to seal off the port and subdue the pirates! The other eight hundred will go to stop the necromancers!" Well, that takes care of the numbers, now for the PEOPLE...
  520. [21:16:59] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro nods.
  521. [21:22:13] <Hitomi> "I'd prefer if I was sent to the undead, though you may still choose to send us anywhere you wish."
  522. [21:22:50] <Mitsuwa_Ichiro> "I'm going wherever you're going, my leige."
  523. [21:28:45] <Atsuko> "Very well, then... Mitsuwa! Eien! Hitomi! You shall be accompanying me to the eastern village!" This totally came out infinitely faster than Botherer took to figure it out!
  524. [21:30:38] * Mitsuwa_Ichiro nods.
  525. [21:32:03] <~Plutonis> "That leaves... Oh Hira, you'll be taking that young girl and his steely father. Also that Kentarou boy." Yadoyama nods while taking his map.
  526. [21:32:33] <Norio> "Steely!  Hahaha I LIKE it!"
  527. [21:32:43] <Hitomi> "Got it." She's OK with this! He's doing well~
  528. [21:35:14] <Hiramasa> "Understood, sir."
  529. [21:38:54] <~Plutonis> And so, the two armies are assembled! Riding as the sun starts to fall at the horizon, they shall now fight their first and likely last battles... I am just a simple narrator, though, and it would be much rude from me to tell their results right now. But worry not, little ones, for this is just our prologue...
  530. [21:39:02] <~Plutonis> [/session]
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