me being a fucking upset shasuhdjasdh

i think i got myself in this pickle by tempting you with stuff he said about you and shiz asjdaksd - but im very conflicted because now i dont want you to be angry at me but i also wanna give seas his privacy and
i feel like i cant express this right because whatever i right is just gonna be a dead giveaway and stuff, and i feel like even writing
that is gonna make you swing one way or another, im sorry if this is all very incoherent im upset and i cant like properly think striaght. i think he probably likes you, but i was dumb to tease you and stuff
i guess i got the impression we were just like, being "playful" i didnt think you would actually get angry at me (rightfully so) - so that was stupid of me, and now im in this big old moral dialemma, i started
it by like, teasing u, and now im in a situation where i have to pick between you being angry at me (which makes me pretty sad) or me like, sharing stuff seas has told me about his look on relatationships and stuff
(which would also, make me pretty sad) and its not even that im choosing between makes me less sad, because im trying to pick between having someone angry at me or giving out someones like, personal views and
experience, pshhh u can probsably see why this is so long now, im trying to write it in word so you dont see me typing for (as of writing this sentence) 15 minuetes,i dont wanna read back over this because iv already gotten myself in a big emotional state over
it and dont wanna heccin re live it, so im sorry if i made a bunch of ramblings or whatever, and im also sorry for like, making you angry, and am kinda hoping u understand where i went wrong, and how im now
in a huge big dialemma that has me choosing between two things that i really dont want. who knows mabey you werent/arnt even angry and me writing this is all part of a tv show called "james worries and apologises
profusely" either way i thought id type this all out, even tho it kinda shreds me up a bit, but at this point i feel like im gonna end up in a state i really dont wanna get to if i let it all build up. im trying to
think of a good point to end this because everytime i think iv gotten all that out more comes on, but imma just end it here before i get somewhere all shitty with myself :P