$field_names    = array("forname", "lastname");
    $alias          = array(":fn", ":ln");
    $assignment     = array(":fn" => 'hund',
                                                    ":ln" => 'pferd');
    $table_name = 'userdata';
    update($field_names, $alias, $assignment, $table_name);

 so rufe ich den scheiss auf